Rarity's sobbing snapped Red out of his stupor. The sight of her threatened to knock him right back into one however, and as it was he had to spend a moment staring in shock. Her pristine coat had been mussed something awful, the normal snowy whiteness replaced with a dust smeared and blood splattered mess. She wept into her forelegs, shaking with pain and fear. Gently as he could Red laid a hoof on her shoulder, hoping to offer some comfort as he checked her over for injuries.
Red himself wasn't in the best of shapes, his blood red coat stained a few shades darker with the life's blood of his kills, but he didn't notice. He only had eyes for the mare whom he'd just committed murder to keep safe. She'd cringed slightly at his touch, but soon allowed him to draw her into a gentle hug, weeping into the fur of his shoulder. He held her tightly, tears flowing down his own face freely.
In his own mind he was now no better than every cruel twisted figure who'd done him some harm. In many ways he was worse, so very much worse. They'd beaten him, made his life hell, but they'd never robbed him of it. Never once robbed anything of life that he knew of, but he had. No matter the reason, no matter if good came of it, he'd killed three living creatures and he'd done it so very easily. In the clarity that only comes after the fact he realized that he'd not only killed them, he'd done it in a horrid manner. All murder was horrid sure, but to beat someone to death with a shovel? Gods below... He didn't deserve to be in such a peaceful place as Equestria. He didn't deserve to be given such a great gift. He didn't de-
"Thank you..." whispered a soft voice in his ear. "If you hadn't been here, I don't think I would be..."
Red blinked, distracted from his dark thoughts by those simple and heartfelt words, and the fact that they'd been spoken by somepony who'd been nothing but kind to him in the first place hit him like a freight train. The feeling of the mare who's life he'd saved by taking three other lives hugging him tightly and pressing her lips softly to his bloody cheek floored him. She was thanking him for doing something so violent? He couldn't believe it, not at all. It was so against what he knew of pony sensibilities.Still... She was right, he'd saved her life even at so great a cost, and that ment at least some good had come from his actions.
Gems forgotten he gathered her up, holding her tightly, and took wing. He flew automatically, concern for his new found and injured friend occupying his mind. At some point he simply black out, and knew no more, overwhelmed by his thoughts and feelings and unable to cope.
He awoke to find himself floating in a star-filled expanse of darkness, alone and afraid. Where was he, why was he here, and what had happened to Rarity were the only questions on his mind. The only questions until a soft and familiar voice spoke behind him.
"Crevan... You're alright, relax and talk to me for awhile please." said Celestia, walking calmly towards him across the Astral plane. She wore a soft comforting smile, her eyes touched with sadness and her bearing a bit subdued as if by a great weight pressing down on her normally regal frame. Slowly she sat down near him, extended her wings, and wraped the confused and scared pegasi in a warm embrace. "Everything will be ok Crevan, or Red if you prefer that name now." she whispered in his ear.
"How can it?" he replied with a hint of pain and bitterness tinting his words. "I... I killed three living, breathing, THINKING, beings. I don't deserve to be here, even if I did save a life. Nothing can excuse murder, nothing." He broke into sobs at his own words, clinging to the princess like a drowning man to a piece of flotsam. He wept for the lives he'd taken, for the lack of remorse he'd felt while wielding that shovel, and for the fact that he'd not even given them a chance in his blind fury.
Celestia remind silent for a few moments, letting him cry himself out. Gently she kissed the top of his head and pushed him away enough to look him in the eye. "My little pony," he cringed at that, "That's exactly why you do deserve what you've been given. Nothing excuses violence and murder, that is true. However, you don't have to excuse it in this case. You fought in defense of another's life and your own. My dear boy, you're a hero to Rarity and her friends, to Ponyville, and to my sister and I. Rarity and the others for obvious reasons, you saved her life and got her to a hospital at great risk to yourself. For me and my sister you are a hero not because you saved a life, but because even after taking three you weep for them. You shed not a single tear for yourself, but for the lives you were forced to take."
Red Wyne sat and listened to all this quietly, sniffling every now and again. It offered him little comfort, but he knew she was right. He'd saved Rarity, had gotten her medical care, and he'd do it again if he had to... But he'd try and avoid taking lives if he could have. The princess' admission that he couldn't have avoided doing so brought fresh tears to his eyes and he hugged her tightly once more. In the back of his mind a little hissing voice whispered They deserved worse...
He ignored it, falling asleep in the wings of the princess who'd not only played a part in giving him a new home, but had just comforted him when he needed it. Celestia smiled softly down at him, and let him drift back to the Prime Material plane, safe in the knowledge that he would be safe and whole when next he awoke. She cared for her little ponies, even those who hadn't always been her's. "Sleep well..." she whispered to him.
Red awoke some time later to find himself in a hospital bed, six mares standing around his bed, mounds of flowers and get well cards piled up on every viable space, and the warm glow of grateful friends showering him like a blessing from the heavens. He smiled softly, drawing attention to his being awake, and was immediately wrapped in a six way hug that he could honestly say he didn't mind, despite the rib cracking force of it. It just made him feel all the more grateful to have been placed here.