When Dark Flare, Phoenix’s conscience, talks, it looks like this.
When White Fire, Phoenix’s other conscience, talks, it looks like this.
When Phoenix Flame talks mentally, it looks like this.
Inside the Ponyville hospital, Nurse Redheart tenderly cared for the sick and injured patients. it was the dream she always wanted when she was a foal. And with every job came its ups and downs. All day she passed data sheets, tools, and medicine to the doctors, caring for all the poor ponies in need. The only things she kept to herself were her nurse’s cap, a smile, and a spoon.
Outside the hospital, Phoenix Flame stood, pondering about how he would get into the building.
Just go inside the building and ask for Nurse Redheart.
We tried that remember? They just said that she was busy and can’t see anypony right now.
Why don’t you hurt yourself?
How about: this is just a game, and I’m not going to hurt myself just to Blammo one pony.
I can hurt you.
Fuck you Dark Flare.
Phoenix groaned as he continued to try to find a good way into the hospital. As the ideas filled his mind, he began to realize more and more that the only way was to injure himself. He could wait for Nurse Redheart to finish her job, but she could still be holding her spoon. And he couldn’t get the nurse in her home, because he was a Pegasus.
Ever heard of Intensive Care?
No.
Voluptuous images of Nurse Redheart with another stallion entered his mind.
What the hell Dark!?!
I’m just saying, you can get lucky.
Phoenix shook his head, trying hard to erase the images that penetrated his mind. It seemed as though the only option was to, unfortunately, hurt himself.
Alright Dark, I give up. You can hurt me. Just don’t make it too rough, okay?
Woohoo! And don’t be such a pussy, it won’t hurt that much…
Dark Flare took over Phoenix’s body. He quickly searched the area to find the most suitable form of injury. Breaking his legs of wings would be ineffective, since those were actually useful. The hospital wouldn’t take something so trivial as a cut or bruise either.
Dark Flare got himself into a running stance.
Is this really necessary?
The Pegasus charged himself at the tree ahead of him. He bent down his head and closed his eyes to ready for impact. The sound of crunching bark blasted his ears as he made contact. The stallion stumbled back after the impact. A warm trickle of blood ran down his face.
See, not too bad right?
Close enough…
Phoenix regained control of his body and staggered towards the hospital.
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“YEAH!” Pinkie, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash exclaimed. After a night filled with Blammos, the three mares were thirsty for their next targets. They could have done nothing for the next two days, but where was the fun in that? The trio trotted over to the facilitator’s table, each of them ready for anypony they would get.
“Pinkamena? Yes, your next target is the Mister Phoenix Flame.”
Pinkie nodded excitedly. It didn’t matter who the target was, she knew every single pony on that list and had the abilities to get them. Pinkie sense, two spoons, and knowing where nearly everypony lived, she was an unstoppable machine. Up next was Twilight.
“Twilight Sparkle? Your new target is the Mister Crimson Brass.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Pinkie! I need you!” Her first Blammo wasn’t as exciting as she thought it would be. Daisy merely shrugged at her Blammnation, her two friends weeping for her. As satisfying as her first target was, it wasn’t quite as exciting as her friends’ were.
Rainbow Dash eagerly stepped up to the table. “The name’s Rainbow Dash. I Blammoed Fyrefly!”
“Good for you,” the pony said, pushing aside any comments. Now then, Miss Rainbow Dash…. looks like your new target is Miss Lily.”
Rainbow smiled. “At least it’s somepony I know this time.” One of the flower trio, just like twilight’s old target. Fyrefly was pretty tough on Sky High, as far as Rainbow Dash heard.
Pinkie and Twilight finished their conversation of their new targets as Rainbow Dash approached.
“So Rainbow, who did you get?” Twilight asked.
“No one too special, just Lily. Somepony I know this time though,” Rainbow replied.
“Lily? Another one of the flower trio… So are you heading over to their shop now?”
“Nah, I have to head over to Lyric’s place. I was supposed to meet up with him yesterday, but my schedule got…. clouded up.”
The three continued their chat as they trotted away from the table. Another successful Blammoer strolled her way over to the table.
“We have effectively Blammoed our target, Allie Way. We wish to receive our new target.”
The facilitator graciously bowed. There was no need to ask for her name, for you would have to be a foal not to know of the great Moon Princess. Luna was beaming, truly enjoying herself for the first time in over a millennium.
“Of course Princess,” the pony exclaimed. “Your new target is…. the Mister… Ice.”
The princess’s smile faltered. She was nearly the exact opposite of Pinkie, not knowing most of the ponies in Ponyville. She expected it to be a pony she did not know, but still hoped for one of the Mane Six.
“Thank you,” Princess Luna said. Whether it was the game itself or the effects of the late night, Luna definitely wanted to experience the pleasure of Blammoing somepony once more. Hundreds of years by herself, and now she was finally interacting with others. Oh, how joyous it would be for me to win the entire competition!
Meanwhile, Lyric Noir opened his front door to find Rainbow Dash with a small blush on her cheeks.
“Hey Lyric… I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to dinner last night…” Rainbow said sheepishly.
Lyric tapped his hoof, waiting for a response.
“Okay, so here’s the story. I was going after my target in Blammo when I got stuck in her wall. She left me there for hours until one of her friends finally let me out. But it’s not too bad, I got my target in the end!”
Lyric dropped her serious gaze and chuckled a little. He could never stay angry with Rainbow for too long. And even if he did, he would fall right apart when she put a pout on her adorable face. At least she didn’t just completely forget.
“All right Rainbow, I forgive you,” Lyric stated.
“Thanks,” Rainbow answered. Her response was accompanied with a warm hug, which made Lyric’s heart jump with joy. Even after months of being with Rainbow Dash, he still shuddered at the feel of her warm fur against his.
“Congratulations by the way. You know, I got my target too. You know Bonbon right?”
Rainbow pulled away from her coltfriend. “You’re the one that Blammoed Bonbon? You know she started crying…. even if she was overreacting.”
“I know… and I do feel bad, I swear! I didn’t want or expect her to start bawling, but I had to get her out somehow…”
“Why are you even in the competition? Your father should have plenty of money. There’s no real need for you to want the prize money.”
“You’re right. But my mom wants me to make more friends, other than you. She thought this would be a great way for me to ‘meet new ponies’. So, I signed up.”
Rainbow shrugged. His mother was right, he did need to get out more. Other than herself and some of her friends, Lyric barely went outside at all.
“Makes sense to me,” Rainbow replied.
“Yeah… anyways, do you know anypony named Girokon?”
Lyric could make out a small shade of red on Rainbow’s cyan cheeks when she heard that name. Little did he know that the poor stallion was nearly molested by Rainbow Dash. Twice. Or perhaps even more.
“Umm yeah, I heard of him. You should go ask Twilight, she knows a bit more about him.”
“Is there something you’re not telling me Rainbow?”
“Nope, nothing at all,” Rainbow lied. “Whoa! Would you look at the time, got to head over to Applejack’s. See you around Lyric!” Rainbow Dash turned and darted off to the clouds.
“Wait, what about.....” Lyric sighed. Sometimes, that pony can just….
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Razor Graze’s conscience Kill writes in the brackets and bolded]
< His conscience Joy writes in these and Italics>
{He respond in these}
Razor Graze allowed his nose to drop under the warm water of the hot tub. There wasn’t any use in not having a little bit of relaxing time since he was here. A small stream of bubbles surfaced as he breathed out. As hectic as things could get, it was nice to soak in some peace.
Graze’s head submerged entirely under the warm water. His head sprung back up as he gasped for air. So much for peace. He shook his head to get some of the moisture out of his mane.
“What the hay!?”
“Sorry muffin, but you were getting too relaxed. We’re here on a mission, remember?” Ditzy stated.
“I know, I know. But can’t we at least have a little fun while we’re here?”
[Spa. Day. Soiree. C’mon! It’s on every colts bucket list of things to do in his life.]
{I’m not having a four way!}
“Umm…. Graze?” Ditzy asked.
“Yes Bright Eyes?”
“Umm… your wings.”
Graze’s eyes widened as he suddenly realized his wings were spread out like two large pans.
<Don’t want a four way, huh?>
As Graze struggled to keep his wings down, the two ponies of the spa trotted over.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Aloe began, “but is there anything you two need?”
“Not right now. We’ll call if anything comes up,” Ditzy replied.
The two sisters nodded and trotted away. Both of them held their spoons firm in their mouths, and had decorated them to match their coats. Lotus having a spoon with a blue handle and a pink head. Aloe having a spoon with a pink handle and a blue head.
“So what’s the plan?” Ditzy asked.
Graze raised a hoof to his head as he thought. “How about…. tabletop?”
Ditzy gave her coltfriend a confused look. “Tabletop?”
“Well I would start talking to Lotus. And then you would sneak up behind her and crouch. When you’re ready, I’ll push her. She’ll stumble back onto you, fall over into the hot tub, and drop her spoon. And then BLAMMO!” Graze explained.
“That’s great for you, but what about me and getting Aloe?” argued Ditzy.
“Oh yeah, that’s true…”
Aloe looked over to her sister who was filing her hooves.
“Don’t you think it’s weird?”
“Think what is weird?” Lotus responded.
“Don’t you think it’s strange that Ditzy and Graze are here? I mean, Ditzy normally doesn’t come to the spa, and this is the first time Razor has ever been here.”
Lotus stopped her filing and looked at her sister. She always believed Aloe thought too much, but was she perhaps… “What are you trying to say Aloe?”
“What I’m trying to say is, I think one of them might be our stalkers for Blammo,” Aloe answered.
“Well, it makes sense I guess…”
“You guess? It makes perfect sense. Those two barely show up here and when they do, it just so happens to be right after Blammo starts. Not only that, but those two are still holding their spoons! They’re probably thinking of a way to get one of us as we speak.”
“Aloe, don’t be so paranoid. What if they just wanted to…”
“Lotus! Can you come over here?” Graze called out.
The spa ponies turned their attention to the two clients. Both of them stood out of the hot tub, water dripping down their manes.
“Well, looks like I’m needed,” Lotus said.
“Don’t go!” Aloe yelled out, blocking her sister’s path. “I’ll go instead. If they asked for you personally, then they must be going after you, right? If I go instead, that’ll completely throw off their plans.”
“Aloe, you’re taking this game too seriously, don’t you think”
“NO!” Aloe interrupted. “Let me go instead!”
“Alright! I’ll just stay back then…”
Aloe nodded. She started her trot over to the couple. They think they’re so smart. Hah! This’ll foil their plan. No way are either of them getting MY sister out.
“What do you two need?” Aloe said, putting on a fake smile.
“Where’s Lotus?” Graze asked.
“Oh, she’s busy right now…” Hah! They are trying to Blammo her! “But I’m free right now. So why did you call?”
Graze looked over to Ditzy. Ditzy answered back with a silent shrug.
<Just switch the positions. Let Ditzy get Aloe first and then you can get Lotus.>
{But I don’t want to wait for my Blammo. It was hard enough figuring out a plan to get them both out and Aloe comes out instead and it’s really nice for Ditzy and all because she’ll definitely get Aloe out, but I want my Blammo and ah want it now!!!}
<Shut up and wait.>
{But I….}
[I just want to push somepony!!]
“Well we think there might be a crack in the tub, do you think you can check it out?” Ditzy asked.
“And why, exactly, did you ask for Lotus specifically?”
Ditzy looked over to Graze for an answer. “Well umm… you’ve done so much today, we thought we might give you a break…” he answered.
“Right,” What a terrible excuse… “Well, let me just take a quick peek.” Aloe leaned her head over the clear waters. The bottom of the tub was the same as always, smooth and crack free.
“I don’t see anything here…” A sudden push from behind sent her flying over the waters. Everything seemed to move in slow motion for her. The cool artificial air enveloped her as she was thrust forward. The clear water below grew in front of her eyes. She was able to let out a small shriek right before her body hit the water. A small convulsion passed as the sudden warmth hit her body.
A sharp signal passed through her brain as she swallowed a large gulp of water. She turned her head upwards and swam to the surface. Aloe took in a large breath as oxygen was introduced her lungs once more. She followed up with a few coughs, trying to get the water out.
“BLAMMO!”
Aloe rubbed the water out of her eyes and looked up to see Ditzy holding a spoon right on the top of her head. Aloe gasped as she looked back into the tub to see her spoon lying helplessly on the floor. The warm water of the tub was mixed in with the warm water that began to trickle out of Aloe’s eyes. After all of her planning, all of her expectations, it turned out that it was her that the pair were going after.
Lotus watched all of the action unfold on the chair of the booth. She couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle as her sister’s prediction came true. Oh well, I guess Aloe was right. They were going after one of us.
She put down her file and trotted over to the three. At the edge of the tub, Aloe laid on the ground, a large frown on her face. Lotus put on a smile and stroked her sister’s mane comfortingly.
“It’s okay Aloe, it’s okay. So you got Blammoed, it’s not the end of the world.”
Aloe simply laid there and didn’t give any response.
“And hay, you were right! They were going after one of us. That was pretty smart of you.”
A smile appeared on Aloe’s face for just a second, before it disappeared again. Lotus let out a sigh.
“C’mon Aloe. I’ll go make your favorite tea. How does that sound?” Lotus inquired, forcing her sister onto her hooves. “Umm… you two don’t mind if we leave, right?”
“No problem,” Graze answered. “But I think Aloe’s crash might have put a crack in the hot tub.”
“Wait, seriously?! It costs a lot of bits to fix something like that!” Lotus peered over the hot tub. All she could see through the clear waters was a lone spoon.
“Where do you see a crack? I…”
Graze pushed on Lotus’s rump as hard as he could. The pony was sent flying forward and landed in the water with a satisfying Kersplash.
[Buck yeah!! We should do this more often.]
<Pool party anypony?>
Lotus popped her head out of the water. She also let in a large gulp of air to catch her breath.
“BLAMMO!”
[Brohoofs all around.]
^.^ /) (\ ^.^ /) (\^.^
Lotus propped herself out of the tub. She looked back down into the warm waters. The spoons were now keeping each other company on the tub’s floor. Lotus let out a giggle as she strained the water out of her mane.
“I didn’t see that coming… So both of you were after us?” Lotus asked.
“Eeyup,” Graze answered.
“Wow. Well, I don’t really know what to say to that, other than good luck with the rest of the competition.”
“Thanks,” Graze and Ditzy said mutually.
“Now about the bill…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a bright and sunny day, perfect for flowers. Not too hot, not too windy, not too dry, just right. Rose and Daisy tended to their flower shop just as every other day. Lily was out trying to find her target. The three had agreed to taking turns to stay in the game. Rose had just finished her turn and Daisy had been taken out by none other than Twilight Sparkle.
In the shrubbery across the shop, laid three little fillies. Two of them were chattering quietly with one another as the third peered through binoculars.
“Can you two please pay attention? You girls agreed to help me with Rose and all you two are doing are talking,” Sweetie Belle said, looking up from her binoculars.
“But it’s so boring!” Scootaloo replied. “Can’t we go after my target instead?”
“Quit complaining. We still have to wait for Rainbow Dash to come back and tell us where Lyric Noir lives. So until then, just help me out.”
“Well as fun as starin’ at them is, we need to take action. How’s about we make a plan?” Apple Bloom suggested.
“What kind of plan?” Scootaloo asked.
“Well, ya see, what you have to do is…”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I don’t know Dinky, Big Mac is really…. well big. I don’t want to mess with him,” Pipsqueak whispered.
“Don’t worry Pip, Big Mac doesn’t bite. Unless you really really tick him off,” Dinky Doo answered.
“But that’s what I’m afraid of!”
“Pip, we snuck out here at eight in the morning just so we can get your target. Now are you going to go get him or not?”
Pipsqueak gulped. He wasn’t normally afraid to take a challenge, but when it came to somepony as big as Big Mac, then there was trouble. “But… but he still has his spoon. I can’t get him right now.”
“Well we’re going to have to change that then, won’t we?” Dinky said. She followed up by whispering a plan into her friend’s ear.
“Golly Dinky Doo! That’s a great idea!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Author’s Note: In case you are wondering about some of the ponies that were mentioned in this chapter, here some links:
Phoenix Flame is an OC from the story "Where.... am I?" The story had just been changed to Mature. So, be careful.
In case you are wondering, Intensive Care is a real clop-fic. I don't read clop-fics, but I saw this on the premiere five thing and remembered the plot (lulz plot).
Dinky Doo and Pipsqueak.