Derpy's House, Ponyville, Equestria
December 30th, 2059 (Earth Calendar)
It's been a slow day for Angel Bunny. He's spent almost two days cooped up in a tiny little cottage with Tank, the flying Turtle. All six Elements of Harmony were in Canterlot to attend the coronation of Twilight Sparkle (yes I'm Twilicorning) and unfortunately for Angel, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash has both decided that out of all the ponies in Ponyville that could have been appointed to watch them, Derpy was the best choice. Owlicious was here too but he wasn't so bad, he just sat there and confused Derpy with his constant hooting. What was a much bigger problem for Angel (aside from an out-of-control flying turtle) was Derpy's annoying little shit of a daughter, Dinky. She wasn't bratty or anything, she was probably one of the sweetest little fillies in Equestria but Angel hated her nonetheless. She was constantly poking him, petting him and snuggling him against his will. He hadn't been this miserable since the time Spike was told to watch the pets of the Elements. He had to get out. The whirring of a propeller told him that Tank was on the move again and Angel turned just in time to dodge the airborne reptile. As Angel did a tuck and roll of the stool he had been sitting on he heard the sound of shattering glass. He turned expecting to see a guilty looking Tank but instead found an embarrassed Derpy.
"Ponyfeathers" exclaimed Derpy "Dinky! Muffin!" she called to he filly.
"What's up mum?" Dinky peeped as she appeared from behind a corner.
"I'm going to have to go to the store to get a new lamp, can you keep an eye on the critters while I'm out?"
"Another one mom? That's the second one this week! Maybe we should take you to a doctor..." Dinky said tentatively.
"Nonsense" replied Derpy as she gathered her bits "There's nothing wrong with my vision! I can see just fi- OW!!" she shouted as she knocked her head on the door on the way outside.
The door shut and Dinky was left alone with the animals. This was Angels chance to escape! He eyed the turtle who was still sailing through the air at a considerable speed. Choosing his moment, he carefully climbed back up on his stool and at the right second he jumped and caught Tank by the feet. Tank spun out of control (even more than usual) and just as Angel let go he struck Dinky right in the back of the head, knocking her out cold.
'Sorry kid' thought Angel as he proceeded to wriggle through the nearest open window. 'Nothing personal, it's just that I hate you'
Angel didn't plan to be gone very long, he just needed to get away from the madhouse that was Derpy taking care of three critters. Besides, Dinky hadn't seen it coming and Tank wasn't going to tell anybody.
'Hey' he thought as he made his way across Derpy's yard 'maybe I put that filly in a coma! Or maybe I killed her! That would certainly make my life easier!'
He mad a mad dash for the bushes, as he would most certainly be recognized if anypony saw him. He did a super badass barrel roll into the nearest garden and peaked out from between the branches of his hiding place. Derpy's cottage was farther away from the center of Ponyville than most other houses, but there was still a long open stretch of road that stood between Angel and his goal; the Everfree forest. He would sometimes take off to the forest when Fluttershy was out of the house and he had a specific spot that he liked to hang around. Sometimes he'd even get some rabbit poon there. He looked up and down the long stretch of gravel road that led into Ponyville to make sure that he wouldn't be spotted by anypony heading in or out of town. When he was satisfied that he could remain undetected, he made another dash for the tall grass on the other side of the road. Once safely concealed in the grass Angel began calmly hippety hopping over towards the treeline.
Most of Ponyville's citizens avoided the Everfree, and if they did venture inside they were probably going to see Zecora. They would stay diligently on the path to avoid getting lost and as a result almost all of the Everfree was still unexplored. Every reason the ponies seemed terrified of the massive forest seemed idiotic to Angel, but then again most things seemed idiotic to him. The forest was large, dark and did have a few dangers such as timber wolves or poison joke, but those could be avoided easily enough. The weather moved over the forest with no interference from pegasi which also seemed to frighten the locals.
'What a bunch of pussies' thought Angel contemptuously as he crossed into the forests shadowy depths.
To be fair, the forest did have plenty of regions that were dark and unnerving but it also had many places that bloomed with vibrant flowers and were home to a plethora of friendly creatures.
'If only those pansies had the balls to look for them' Angel mused once again as he approached his favourite hangout in the forest.
He was about to simply burst through the underbrush into the small clearing when he noticed that a number of small creatures as well as a bear were huddled together in some bushes. Curious, Angel approached them. The clearing that they were spying on from the shadows was home to a large cave, which Angel had named "Headache Cavern" for the simple reason that whenever he approached it his head felt like it was about to explode. Angel soon realized why his compatriots were drawn to the spot. An ominous rumbling sound emanated from the mouth of the cavern. As it grew steadily louder so the collective nerve of the animals watching grew steadily more shaken. Soon the ground began to shake in unison with the rumbling and at last a set of lights came into view. From the opening in the rock emerged a creature- no... A machine, a huge machine bigger than a farm tractor. It appeared to be made of some sort of metal, propelled in the front by wheels and in the back by a set of treads such as the ones that could be seen on a bulldozer. It was a dark green in colour, matching the forest and was covered in irregular black stripes going diagonally from top-front to bottom-back. Atop the strange iron monster was a small hump with a triangular face, and a rather large tube sprouting horizontally from it. As the machine turned Angel could make out the letters "IOFR" and "CVM-4 CENTURION", also imprinted on the side was a large red star. These made little sense to Angel who, looking around realized that he was the only one of the animals who hadn't taken off.
"What's the situation down there?" a voice called .
Angel's attention snapped back towards the clearing. The machine had found a place to rest and was currently sitting broadside to Angel. In the sheer awe of the spectacle Angel hadn't even noticed the smaller creature sitting atop the mechanical mount. This new animal was now standing tall atop two legs, it was mostly brown in colour with a few patches of paleness on its head and at the end of its upper appendages. Angel began to think that the brown part was clothing. On it's head sat a cap, similar to that of a policestallion but wider and brown. The creature also had a large hump on its back, whether this was part of the creature itself or its attire Angel couldn't tell but he saw a long, thin black rod poking out of the hump. It seemed to be talking to the back of its machine but Angel's confusion was laid to rest when he saw the head of a similar creature appear from where the first was looking.
"Not too bad sir, that cave brought down our firing computer which we're rebooting right now. Our radio also died but now it seems to be working okay. There doesn't seem to be any effect on the mechanical components, just electrical problems. We should have everything fixed within a half an hour" the one in the vehicle said.
"Good. While you're at it let Kolba and McPhee know that we need to clear up some space to dump the choppers"
The second creature responded with a "Yes Kommandant" but Angel didn't stick around to watch, and didn't see roughly sixty more plus another machine pour out of the cave's maw.
Angel had turned tail and fled. He didn't know what he saw, but he knew that he had to let somepony know about these strange creatures and their thundering machines. Hopping through the thick Everfree foliage, he sped towards Ponyville as fast as he could. Within minutes Derpy's cottage came into view and in a few more moments he had sprinted across the front yard and done a flying ninja leap through the open living room window.
>Inside Derpy was consoling a crying Dinky and holding a bag of ice to where Tank had struck her.
"It's all my faaaaaaault!" sobbed Dinky. "I-I don't know what happened! I just got hit on the head and when I got up Angel was g-goooonnee!!!"
"Shhh muffin! It's okay, we'll find that bunny! I promise" Derpy cooed.
"Fl-fluttershy is going to be sooo mad at me!" Dinky continued to bawl.
Angel, feeling no sympathy for Dinky was thumping his large foot impatiently. This drew the attention of the two ponies and after the unwanted hugging and promises by Dinky to never lose him again, Angel proceeded to freak the fuck out. He ran to and fro, tried to mimic the machine he had seen and it's strange inhabitants. He took a pencil and paper and drew a crude stick figure of the aliens and their vehicle. Dinky and Derpy were hopelessly lost.
>If he could talk Angel would have said something along the lines of "Fine then, don't come crying to me when you get your BRAINS EATEN or some crazy shit!" before storming off.
Anon sat with his body half inside the Centurion, his torso protruding from the gunner's hatch. The rumbling of expedition's engines reverberated off of the smooth walls of the cave, making it hard for Anon to think. He looked ahead and noticed with dissapointment that some of the infantrymen were walking slightly ahead of his vehicle, off to the side. He would have to make note of which one of them was the first to leave the cave's other opening considering they could be the first human to set foot on the soil of this mysterious new territory. Anon was made uneasy by the cave's interior. It was's irregular or rough like a normal cave, but perfectly smooth on all four sides, smooth like glass. Soon the light from the exit was bright enough to negate the need for the Centurion's headlights.
'Not a moment too soon' thought Anon after they were finally clear of the cave.
The cavern interior gave him both the creeps and a headache and he didn't know why but he got the strangest feeling that it also gave him some sort of severe diarrhea, but only time would tell on that one.
As the Centurion exited the cave it turned off to the left and found a place to park. Anon surveyed the immediate surroundings. They were in a clearing in a forest. The sky was a pleasant blue and the sun shone brilliantly. He smelled the air, it was clean and fresh.
'My God, I haven't smelled air like that since the winter of '56' he thought pleasantly.
His attention was caught by the Centurion's gunner tapping him on the leg. He quickly pulled his lower half out on top of the vehicle.
"What's the situation down there?" he called.
"Not to bad sir," the gunner responded "that cave brought down our firing computer which we're rebooting right now. Our radio also died but now it seems to be working okay. There doesn't seem to be any effect on the mechanical components, just electrical problems. We should have everything fixed within a half an hour"
"Good. While you're at it let Kolba and McPhee know that we need to clear up some space to dump the choppers" Anon yelled back as he looked back at the helicopter strapped to the trailer behind the Centurion.
Foot soldiers had begun to file out of the cave's mouth, followed by Kolba and McPhee riding aboard the Babylon with McPhee's engineers and Juarez's medics trailing behind them.
McPhee!" he called. The young man's head turned to his direction "Get you're boys working on bringing some of these trees down! There's not enough room in here for all our junk!" McPhee acknowledged with a salute and turned to begin issuing orders to Kolba.
Within minutes Kolba and McPhee were directing the Babylon in it's new role as lumberjack. Using it's massive weight and awesome engine power to knock down trees. By nightfall their camp was constructed and operational at the mouth of the cave. The last structure to be erected was a flag pole, the scarlet IOFR banner was the first, but not the last human standard to fly on Equestrian soil.