When I woke up, I was slightly disorientated. Not 'woke up in Vegas with no recollection of the previous night, a pounding headache and a mysterious ring on my finger' disorientated. Just that I knew I wasn't in my room, and I was confused as to why I found myself suddenly waking up in the Barn.
I sat up, and saw that I was also still in yesterday's shorts and t-shirt. "A bit weird," I thought. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I pulled myself up, and started walking to the door.
I tiptoed quietly around the sleeping Twilight curled up on the floor, making my way to the door, when I saw something in a reflection on the window. A body, lying right next to where I was. I spun around and couldn't help but yell out.
"Josh?!"
He woke up with a start.
"Wha?"
"What are you doing here?" I said, half-shouting.
"You invited me over?"
"I mean, why are you still here?"
Josh rubbed his eyes and sat up. "Err...we were in here, and we started...I think we were playing on your Wii. And then you fell asleep, and then Twilight fell asleep, then I fell asleep. I think."
"Okay, fair enough. One more question though."
"What?"
"Why are you in your boxers?"
Josh looked down, and saw himself only in his boxers. Going a bright red, he grabbed his t-shirt from a small pile by his side, and quickly put it on. "I...I tend to get hot when I sleep, and I usually wake up and...er...take some clothes off..."
I raised my hand up to my face, trying my best not to laugh. Eventually, I needed to turn away from him; I was so scared that I would just burst out laughing.
"Come...on..." I said, taking pauses to hold back the laughter. "Let's go...and...get breakfast."
I opened the door, and waited for Josh for get changed, then started walking back towards the kitchen.
I had my hand on the door handle when we heard something that made both our hearts stop.
"And what's this?"
Both of us froze. I slowly spun around to find my grandma standing behind us, hands on her hips, eyebrow raised.
I completely froze. I could sense Josh doing the same next to me. Which is understandable. I mean, what guy wouldn't? And I can hear you now - why was I suddenly so terrified of my grandma? It's not like she forbade me from having friends over, or that anything happened between Josh and me. And I wouldn't have been, if it weren't for that tone.
I have never heard her use that tone with me before. She sounded...angry. And I had no idea how to react to that.
"Err...we..."
She suddenly started laughing, and we both just stood there, so very confused.
"Oh, I'm just messing with you two. Nice to meet you - I'm Grace's grandma, Lillian," she said, extending her hand to Josh.
Josh stared at it for a few seconds, frozen in shock, until he finally took it, shaking it slowly, and said in a quiet voice, "I'm Josh."
"Well Josh, are you staying for breakfast?"
Josh nodded, acting in a way that immediately reminded me of Fluttershy. "Yes, please."
The poor thing. My grandma actually broke him. He just sat in the kitchen with an apple in his hand, slowly eating it, as my grandma smiled at him. As soon as he finished, he pretty much ran out of the house, with a quick goodbye and nothing more.
"Well," my grandma said, once he'd left. "He seems nice. Good boyfriend material."
"He's not my bo-"
"I know, sweetheart."
"Wait. You do?"
"I know my little Gracey. I know when she does and doesn't like someone. And I know when that someone feels the same way."
I smiled. My grandma actually gets me. She is the only one in the world who actually understands what is going on in my head. She's not worried about leaving me in the house because she knows I'm not going to do anything stupid. She gives me permission to have parties because she knows that that's not really my thing, and even if it was, I don't have any one to invite. She trusts me bringing the few friends I do have over because she knows I would not be friends with someone who took advantage of me or would wreck the house or anything.
And this is why I love my Grandma Lil.
I realised, a few hours later, that I probably owed Josh an apology - I mean, he was probably just rocking back and forth in his room, completely broken. So, I called him.
It didn't take him to long to answer.
"Hello?" I heard his voice say.
"I am so sorry Josh."
"About what?"
I paused for a second or two. "My...grandma...?"
He laughed. "Oh, that? It's fine. I mean, it's kinda funny now."
"Okay...?" I will never understand guys.
"Anyway, what's up Grace?"
"No, I just wanted to make sure my grandma didn't break you or anything. We wouldn't want that now, would we?"
"Absolutely not." I could almost hear him smiling on the other side. "Oh, by the way, I'm going into town with Jaime in a minute or so. Wanna tag along?"
"Oh, I wouldn't want to intrude on you guys spending time together."
"Oh please. We'd both love for you come. So, what d'ya say?"
I thought about it for a moment. "I'd love to. I need to get some stuff for Lakeside anyway, so two birds, one stone. Thanks."
"Don't worry about it - we'll come pick you up in like 10 minutes. See ya."
A trip to town doesn't seem like much, but to me it was. Lydia, unlike me, was actually popular amongst the girls in our years. She was always invited to parties and trips to various places, whereas no one ever even considered me as an option. But Lydia was always great and did her best to include me when she could, which was mainly on trips into town. And I knew that all those trips I had been invited on were just out of pity and not much more - she tries to deny it, but I've seen the looks on her friends' faces when I walk up to meet them. They don't want to spend time with me, and let's face it, I don't want to spend time with them really. But sometimes it's nice to feel included, even if it's false.
But I could tell this was different - Josh actually wanted me there, because...we were friends. And I imagine Jaime thought the same. They actually wanted to hang out with me, spend time with me, be a friend to me. And it was fantastic.
After a few minutes, I was outside waiting for them. Josh knew the way to my house, so I wasn't worried about that. But I was a bit worried about how he was getting here. As I was thinking about that, I heard several high pitched beeps from behind me. I spun around to see a small red car, rattling down the road towards me.
Now when I say it was a car, I mean it in the broadest term - it was more like a rusty metal box on wheels that was somehow (probably through luck or maybe magic) moving. I stood there, my mouth gaping wide open, as it pulled (or rather, sputtered) up next to me. The window rolled down and I saw Jaime sitting in the passenger seat. He smiled and waved at me. I was just about to wave back when I saw Josh sitting next to him.
"Yo Grace! Get in!" Josh shouted out to me.
"Yeah, about that. There is no way on Earth I am getting into that."
He sighed. "Hey, this is my baby we're talking about. Don't judge a book by it's cover - she's perfectly safe."
I hesitated for a moment and then grabbed the handle. "Fine, but if I die in this thing, you're explaining it to my parents."
Josh laughed. "Oh come on. Where's your sense of adventure? 'You Only Live Once' after all."
"Don't you dare..."
And with that, Josh sped off, yelling 'YOLO' at the top of his voice, with me sinking into the back seat, wincing. He stopped after a few minutes (thank God), so I asked a question I had been meaning to ask.
"How long have you been driving? I didn't know you had even passed your test."
"A few months now," Josh said, not taking his eyes off the road. "Didn't seem much point in driving into school for the last few weeks, but I drive everywhere else. Jaime'll be passing soon too, hopefully."
Jaime sighed. "I would have passed before you if it wasn't for that stupid examiner." He turned in his seat to look at me. "She's an absolute bitch. She's failed me twice now, for the most ridiculous things. But this prick over here," he pointed to Josh, "he went to a different centre. So he didn't get Mrs 'You Made One Very Minor Mistake That Could Potentially Lead to a Serious Accident So I'm Failing You' - instead, he got a nice one."
"Really? Only one minor?" I asked. That really did not seem fair.
"Well, more than one, but still. I deserved that pass. Well, probably not..."
"Well, I'm sure you'll pass next time. Hopefully you won't get such a horrible examiner." I was still too young to drive. I still had a few months until I could even get my provisional, but driving seemed so difficult - I would not trust myself behind the wheel of a car. At all. I can barely tie my own shoelaces without them coming undone immediately and me tripping over them. Knowing me, I'd probably crash a car after 30 seconds of me touching the wheel. I wouldn't even trust myself to wash a car - I'd probably still end up killing someone.
Despite the feeling of impending doom I got from that metal death trap, Josh was actually a fairly good driver. He never looked away from the road once, never stalled the car or even cut a kerb. However, no amount of safe driving could make me feel at ease, and when we finally parked, I jumped out of the car, practically throwing myself to ground.
Shopping with the guys was an experience I had never had. With Lydia and her friends, it was always that stereotypical girl nonsense - 'let's go bra shopping!' or 'let's go bikini shopping!' and the dreaded 'let's get makeovers together!'. Oh, and don't forget that ridiculous day when we went to a bridal shop and browsed the dresses. I kid you not - they were so close to trying on wedding dresses.
But with Josh and Jaime, it was completely different. The first time I went with them, I could only stay for a short time, so we only really went for some food. But I had all day with them this time, and I was really excited. Actually being able to spend some time with people who were like me... I couldn't ask for anything more.
To get us started, we stopped off to grab some milkshakes first. This was going to be a long day, and we were gonna make sure we had enough energy to take us through the entire day.
The guys ordered their milkshakes first (chocolate-banana and vanilla-caramel) and then I went up to order mine.
"It's quite cramped in here, we're gonna wait for you outside Grace," Josh said, trying his best to move against the river of people entering the shop.
"That's fine, I won't be long." I didn't blame him - this milkshake bar was extremely popular. It was only been open a couple of months but it had literally the best milkshakes in the world. I would queue up for years to get one of these milkshakes and a lot of people would agree with me.
But since there were a lot of people, it was taking them a little longer to get my order ready. They gave me a complimentary chocolate bar and told me to sit down and they'd get it to me as soon as they could. I was debating running outside to tell the guys or just to sit and wait with my chocolate, so I was looking to see just how easy it would be to get out to the door and then back.
And that's when I saw the worst possible thing that could possibly happen.
"Oh shit," I said, quickly turning away, praying to God it didn't see me.
"Gracey."
Fuck.
I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, and turned around.
"Hi Bella."
That stupid little smirk. The number of times I've seen that directed towards me, and it still drives me crazy.
"Fancy seeing you here, Grace. Shopping by yourself? Well, I don't blame you - you need to buy those rags from somewhere, right?" she said, that terrible false smile plastered on her face.
That was the worse part about Bella. What she said wasn't really the issue, it was how she said it. Anyone walking past would hear her tone, and assume she was a great friend of mine, saying such kind things. When in reality, every word that came out of her mouth directed at me was some horrible insult, disguised as either a false compliment or, even worse, an almost caring sentiment.
"No, I'm actually with some friends," I said, trying to glance around to see if I could find either of the guys around to save me from this bitch.
"You, with friends?" she laughed. "Now that's a sight I'd like to see."
And here it was. The reason I cannot stand this girl. Because every time it feels like something good is happening to me, she always somehow seems to swoop in and ruin it. My God, I remember when I first discovered MLP - I felt like it was such a great sweet show and it genuinely made me happy. Happier than I had been in a while at that point. Lydia could see that I was much happier at school, and my parents were shocked at how much I had changed at home.
Then Bella found out.
Granted, I've never been particularly popular when it came to school - people have teased me about all kinds of things, but this was a whole new level.
Just imagine walking into school, noticing that people are staring at you, some of them whispering to each other as you walk past. There are girls shaking their heads and the guys are straight up laughing. And then Bella appears and straight up tells you. That she knows.
The thing is...she didn't just tell people that I watched a kids show. Like people wouldn't care about that, and she knows it. So she did her research, found out about bronies and...well, the reputation that some of them have.
And that's what she tells people.
So then I'm branded as a paedophile and the scum of the Earth, because that is what Bella has told everyone. And they all believed it.
Now I know that bronies are not paedophiles and they're not all gay (even if they were gay, there is also nothing wrong with that) but it is very difficult to explain that to a bunch of teenagers who already dislike you.
This girl has been the bane of my life for years - it seems like it is her goal in life to upset me, to make me feel like I'm worthless, like the world would be better off if I wasn't there.
But that's not true.
"You know what, Bella," I said, refusing to let her mind games work this time. "Shut the fuck up."
I was in the middle of an extremely busy shop, with people around me on all sides, but at that moment it felt like the world had gone silent, and the only two people standing there were me...and Bella.
"What...did you say?" she said, slowly stepping towards me.
I froze with fear. I quite honestly have no idea what came over me - yes, I've said things like that to her, but always under my breath, or after she had walked away. Never actually to her face, though. Saying something like that was always the kind of thing that I thought about 5 hours after the conversation had ended, and wished that I could go back to scream in her face.
And here I had just done it.
And she was furious. My god, if she looked any angrier, she might have burst into flames then and there. I had no idea what to say or do to make this situation any better, until...I thought of Twilight.
I hadn't known Twilight for particularly very long but I had spent a fair amount of time watching her grow up with her friends in Ponyville. And seeing how she had changed from the solitary pony she was, to being surrounded by friends... I knew that I had always found it difficult to make friends, but now I didn't just have Lydia. I have Josh and Jaime, and of course Twilight herself. If I could do what I had always thought was impossible, then maybe that wasn't all I could do.
I looked Bella right in the eyes and spoke the truest words I had ever said in my life.
"You have spent every waking moment of your life making sure that mine is as miserable as it can possibly be. You have tormented me, terrorised me and turned everyone against me. But I'm not taking it anymore. I am not some worthless piece of crap, like you always say I am. I am not some crazy girl, and I am not unwanted or ugly or stupid or any of the other things you call me on a daily basis. I am me - I am kind, I am caring and I am done with your bullshit. So yeah, Bella. Shut up. Shut up, and fuck off."
There was silence for a short while, until I heard someone clapping. I turned to see a few semi-familiar faces standing not too far from us - people I had seen around school - staring directly at me, applauding. Slowly but surely, the applause tricked around the room, until everyone, including the waiters and baristas, was cheering for me, some even shouting 'you go girl!'.
Bella looked startled, and almost scared, as she turned to look around the room. But, for probably the first time ever, there was no one here to support her. There was no one willing to stand with her in her corner.
At this point, she knew exactly what it was like to be me every day of my life - to be heckled by near-strangers while someone you know torments you.
I almost felt sorry for her. The only difference is that she doesn't have to relive this for the rest of her life. I know that I will.
Bella finally had enough and ran out, pushing against the huge crowd, screaming at people to 'get the fuck out of her way', until she was gone.
I turned around to collect my milkshake, and was immediately congratulated by (what felt like) hundreds of pats on the back - "Good for you for standing up for yourself!" "You should never let a bully rule your life!" "Don't let the haters get you down, that was brilliant!"
It felt like they were still cheering when I finally left to rejoin the guys.
"What the hell happened in there?" Josh asked, raising an eyebrow.
"The little guy finally stood up," I said, walking straight past them. I carried on walking as I heard 'what the hell is that meant to mean?!' shouted in my general direction. I laughed and gestured for them to follow.
I honestly can't tell you much about what happened for the rest of the day. We went all around town, visiting all the best shops and spots, but I was in such a daze of happiness that I was essentially on autopilot for the entire day.
I am not the kind of person to stand up for myself. On the contrary, I have buckled under more people that I can't even count. I am not someone to seek out conflict, so I tend to just stay quiet when things happen. God, if Bella had said what I said to me, I would have been completely silent and probably would have just apologised to her, just so it would stop. And here I was, finally standing up for myself. This was a huge step for me, a turning point in my life, and honestly...
I'm really proud of myself.