Dear Princess Celestia,
You probably don't know me from Pony Joe, but I really wanted to write to you, considering not many humans do, I'm sure. Applejack and Twilight convinced me to do this, so might as well. When I came to Equestria, I expected to go on some wild adventure or end up getting into a bunch of silly shenanigans. The result, however, was much better than I thought. I ended up on Sweet Apple Acres, working with Applejack, falling in love, and saving her sister and the CMC from certain doom.
Yes, you read that right, I fell in love with Applejack. To be honest, I was a little unsure at first, but everything about her is hardly different from those in my world. The thing is, though, I thought she was a stereotypical hillbilly or country redneck or something of that sort, but the truth was much better than I expected. She's kind, strong, funny, dependable, honest, and absolutely beautiful. She judged me too, thinking I had raped her sister or had thoughts of raping her! In the end, however, everything turned out alright. I'm helping out with her work on the Acres, reading with Twilight on pony history, and from time to time I go back to my world to take care of business there. And here's the best part; I can literally come back anytime, and time barely moves when I'm gone! I know that there's a chance that this thing with Applejack might not last, but I know that even if it doesn't, there won't be any bad blood between us. We'll still be friends, and maybe things will work themselves out. In the meantime I'm climbing trees, doing homework, helping with the daily harvests and chores, and dodging random questions about how to get a Cutie Mark from Applebloom and her friends. And you know what?
I'm the happiest man on Equestria.
Your newest subject,
John