Chapter 3: Fatty Animal Products
It was raining heavily in Milford as Henry drove through the empty downtown district with Octavia on a chilly Sunday morning. The pony-turned-human leaned quietly against the window, staring at the dreary scene outside. Although she was fascinated by the amazing structures that seemed to surpass the architectural powerhouse that was the industrious city of San Flankcisco, the rain disserviced the beauty of their design. Slowly, he pulled up a side street on North Main Avenue, pushing the car up a steep hill and into a narrow side street that opened up to a large parking lot. He pulled into the lot and found a parking spot towards the side door of the home-sized cafe, gathering his things before cutting the engine. “You ready to go?” He asked, the question prewritten on his slate. Octavia answered with a nod.
Octavia stuck an umbrella outside the door, opening it with a muffled poomf as she ducked beneath it before she could get too wet. After locking the car, Henry joined her beneath the small awning and they made all due haste towards the cafe’s doorway.
“Ugh, this weather is dreadful. Are your weather teams really so terrible they can’t even keep it sunny for even a week, as promised?”
A waitress walked by and chuckled in their direction. “The Milford Weather Stations aren’t the best at reporting accurate weather, but they sure do try their darndest to be professional.”
“Report..? Why not just control the weather?”
She laughed. “If only! I’d have more fun taking photos with my boyfriend instead of getting caught up in this horrible Autumn weather.” She said before attending a customer and leaving them to their own devices.
Octavia slumped into a booth, Henry sitting on the opposite side. “I don’t understand,” Octavia muttered. “You just let the weather be as it is wont? Who controls the day cycle? I’m guessing nopony.”
Henry gave her a small smile as he typed on his slate. “We can’t control the weather so we let it be. As for the day cycle, well, that’s handled by the celestial bodies and the rotation of the Earth. Do try to remember not to use words common in your society just to prevent any problems.”
“Ugh, fine. nobody controls the weather. Nobody controls the sun, nor the moon. They’re all just willy-nilly, and I’m a silly filly. I get it.” Octavia groaned as she planted her head on the table.
A loud squeaking erupted from his throat as he smiled widely, patting her back softly; writing one handed on his slate. “I guess you are a silly filly, ‘Tavi. Don’t ya worry about it though, you’ll get the hang of things soon enough.”
Octavia gave Henry a small, grateful smile as the waitress returned, notepad in hand. “So, what’ll it be for you two today?” She asked, her smile widening as her eyes narrowed flirtishly. “The couple’s treat, perhaps?”
Octavia sat up, ramrod straight, a deep blush kissing her cheeks as she spluttered. “I-I-I- Henry!” She looked at Henry over the table, her eyes shimmering as her lower lip trembled cutely.
Henry just sat there laughing silently, body shaking as tears of mirth streamed down his face. Picking up his slate once again, he typed out— as quickly as he could— “No, that’s alright. We were thinking something along the lines of a latte. Maybe some eggs and french toast.”
“Oh, no problem you two. Do you want to know today’s special?”
He nodded his head in agreement while Octavia nodded, not quite looking at him as she leaned her head into her hand; trying futilely to hide her blush.
“Our special for this morning is the pancake puppy love— such a silly name, but it sells— and with that comes a stack of four pancakes, three strips of bacon, biscuits and gravy, and a slice of toast or an english muffin. I’m sure that a growing man like you could use a hearty meal like that,” The waitress offered with a twirl of her strawberry blonde hair and a small wink.
Henry blushed and looked at her with a shy smile before typing on his slate. “Would you like the special, Octavia?” he asked, holding the slate in front of her as she distractedly stared off into space.
Octavia blinked, and looked at the slate between two of her fingers, her eye flicking across the sentence quickly before she gave a small nod. I really should ask what bacon is... Better to do that in private, though; I don’t wish to make a scene.
He quickly wrote on it. “We’ll both have the special. Could we get some orange juice and coffee milk with that, please?”
“OJ and coffee milk... Okie Dokie! I’ll get that right away!”
Before she left, Henry tugged on her sleeve, writing something. “Thanks for the warm welcome, Tara.” He wrote, a cheery smile on his face.
“Not a problem, Henry. You’re one of our best customers!”
As the waitress wandered off, humming along to the radio, Octavia gave Henry a curious look. “Best customer?”
Henry shrugged, hitting one of his pre-written responses. “This is the only place in town that doesn’t make me feel bad for being mute.”
Octavia smiled. “As long as you feel welcomed here, then so will I. Goddesses know we all need to find someplace where we can be who we are.”
“Not too much of yourself though, my little pony girl,” Henry typed while giving Octavia a cheeky grin. “This is a world where magic is make-believe, talking animals a myth, and where everything is always the President’s fault.”
Her head tilted in curiosity. “Is the President the equivalent of our Princesses?”
Henry shrugged. “He doesn’t have singular control, no. Laws and stuff have to go through Congress first.”
“Ugh, sounds like a lot of time and resources are wasted, then. We’ve spent the last thousand years under the rule of a single monarch. Princess Celestia has always been kind and fair in judgement, even going so far as to return her sister to her rightful throne after being banished for those same thousand years.”
He looked at her in disbelief. “One of the princesses was banished for a thousand years? What could she have possibly done to provoke such a punishment? Was it high treason?”
“High treason!” Octavia snorted. “No, she tried to keep the Sun from rising ever again. The ponies were suffering beneath the cold night, a night that lasted a month. Crops were dying, ponies were freezing, the world was almost torn asunder from the frigid night air. Once Celestia had finally weakened Her sister, Luna... Nightmare Moon... She locked Her sister away in the moon. When Nightmare Moon returned, she almost succeeded in bringing the world to eternal darkness. That night lasted only for an extra 15 hours compared to normal, and it’s all thanks to six young mares who each held a certain Element of Friendship and Harmony in their hearts. I was not one of those six, but I am friends with one... technically.”
Henry cocked an eyebrow and typed out “technically?” on his slate.
“Yes. I’m cousins with the Element of Laughter... Pinkie Pie. She’s a dear, but... you know how hyperactive some can get...”
“Ah... a party animal?”
“Hmmph. Yes, though to her parties are no laughing matter.”
As Henry nodded sagely to this, Tara walked up with a smile, carrying their food. “Here you go, you two! And don’t you worry about it, Henry! Your discount extends to all guests, especially if they’re cute!” She gushed, giggling as Octavia flushed a deep red.
“T-thank you...” Octavia stuttered, thoroughly embarrassed; her bangs fell over her eyes as Tara went back to work.
Henry silently chuckled, pouring syrup on both her pancakes and his before cutting into his greedily, albeit civilly.
“That’s not fair, really. I’m not cute...” Henry looked up in surprise. Octavia didn’t think she was cute? “I mean just look at my arms! They’re so... so... spindly! My legs are barely able to hold my weight, and my chest is horribly imbalanced; I’m not so simple-minded to not recognize breasts, but why must they be so big? I’m not even in heat, so there’s no rhyme or reason to it!”
“You’re not used to being human is all, ‘Tavi.” Henry wrote on his slate, offering her a supportive smile.
“Women shouldn’t be so skinny, though. It’s disgusting and unhealthy. I need to bulk up quite a bit to get back to how I used to be.”
Henry looked at her worriedly. “How much do you define “bulk up” as?” he typed.
“I need to weigh at least two hundred pounds, maybe even three hundred; I’ll need to find a gym to start working my muscles again, and I’ll need to start a vitamin regimen again.” Octavia sighed, taking a bite out of her food. “I really hate taking vitamins, they leave a lot to be desired.”
His eyes bugged out, and he nearly choked on his food. He madly typed away on his slate before holding it out to her in near hysteria. “Are you mad, ‘Tavi!? You weigh at least one-twenty to one-fifty pounds! Any more, and you could be jeopardizing your health!”
“Whah? Jeopardizing my health, hmm? Ugh, I suppose it’s another of those ‘human’ things I’ll need to get used to.” She glared at her plate, snagging a piece of bacon in her hand and biting into it. “Guess I’ll be even weaker than normal. Earth ponies can buck hard enough to knock down trees! I could barely keep a mugger off of me, even after bucking him in the underbelly.”
Henry looked down at his plate, contemplating a follow up as he half-heartedly typed on his slate. “I’m sorry that you feel that way...I uh, didn’t mean to make you upset. If it’s of any encouragement, why don’t you try working out and practicing martial arts? I’m positive it could help you with your issue.”
“Martial Arts? My last teacher was a pegasus, and he kept on getting way too friendly. Should have seen it coming, since his name was Win Wang.”
Burying his fist in his mouth, Henry silently laughed hard, tears sliding down his cheeks at the cruel irony while he typed a response. “W-why... don’t you try another.... form?”
“What, like Tie-Quan-Moo? Or Kenda? Or maybe an adapted form of Wing Tsun?”
Henry only laughed as he made the connections from Octavia’s versions, and the versions he knew.
Octavia went back to eating, not noticing that she was holding her utensils perfectly with nary a spasm in her mood.
The mute man chuckled quietly at her progress. She’s getting better, he thought to himself. But once she’s ready to head out on her own... Will she want to stay with someone like me?
Henry pulled out his keys, unlocking the door as Octavia hummed a few stanzas she could recall from a concerto she’d performed at some point, when a thought flashed into her mind. “Henry,” she asked as he opened the door. “What’s bacon made of? It doesn’t seem to be hay like bacon is in my world.”
Henry weighed his options, thinking about her potentiality to freak out if he didn’t phrase his next statement the right way. He picked up his laptop, fiddling with it to buy him extra time to think.
Octavia sat down on his bed as he looked busily at his laptop by his desk. “Henry?”
He raised his hand, signaling her to wait a moment as he carefully typed a response, feeling a lump forming in his throat as he nervously turned the screen hinge to face her.
Octavia read the words on the screen. “‘Do you have pigs on your world?’ Yes; I’ve met a few who were among the elite in Canterlot, they always made sure to leave a good-sized tip after a concert. As Vinyl would say, their wallets were the fattest part of them.” Octavia’s eyes stop shimmering in reminiscence as she turns a questioning gaze to Henry. “Why do you ask?”
“Well...uh...” he wrote nervously, thinking it over. “Here, on our planet... I told you how Humans are the only species that speak, right?”
“Yes...” Octavia was still wondering about that. Only one sapient species, no magic... how do they survive?
“Well, humans... since we don’t have other creatures here that we can speak to, we instead make use of other animals for food... Bacon is an animal byproduct from pigs.” Henry winced, wondering if blunt honesty was really the best way to go about explaining the food she had taken a liking towards.
“Y-you mean...” The look on her face was an indication that he had been right.
Henry gulped, nodding slowly. He drew in a deep breath, bracing himself for the screaming and shrieking he was expecting, but instead only received a small whimper. “H-henry, please... I need a h-hug...” Numbly, Henry complied, wrapping his arms around her and holding her close as she shook, not really crying, but still in need of comforting.
Her hair smells nice... She’s just been using my shower stuff, so why does hers smell nice? Henry shook the sudden thought out of his head, deciding that it was worth putting before the girl who he was trying to comfort. Nudging her so she would look up, he showed the text he’d typed out, and she gave a small, choked laugh, wiping at her eyes.
“Dummy. You’re a big dummy, Henry. And... I adore you for that.” She nuzzled her face against his chest, sighing as her strength began draining away.
Henry laid her down in bed, not even thinking about it this time. It was obvious she needed comforting, and he’d provide it. After tucking her in gently, he began running his hand through her hair, humming softly as her breathing became regular, and deeper, until she was finally fast asleep. Getting up, he, turned off the light, and quietly made his way to the couch. They’d talk about it in the morning, he decided. If she decided she wasn’t comfortable eating meat products, then he wouldn’t buy any more. And on that note, Henry fell asleep.