//------------------------------//
// FNTK Reborn part 2: Whole new life, Whole new world// Story: From Nobody to Knightmare// by JJ Malcolm//------------------------------//
Album 1: The Greatest Gala Ever
Chapter 1: A whole new life in a Whole New World
Hey, everyone, Knightmare here. Okay, I know this is gonna sound embarrassing, but Twilight just force-fed me my meds because she was getting ticked off by the lack of coherence. Hopefully it won’t be much of an issue later so...yeah...ignore me, and let’s get back to the weird bulls#!t that is my past.
Okay. I last left off having just realized I was on a floating island in the middle of friggin’ NOWHERE. Literally, there was nothing but my island and a scant few others. I wasn’t alone on the island, though. I could tell by the whispering coming from behind me.
“Are you sure he is stable, sister?” came the gruff yet feminine voice of Princess Luna. “We have made so many wrong choices in the past.”
“I am as sure as can be said, Luna,” replied Celestia’s calm and soothing voice. “He is a good soul, and he will remain as such.”
“What of the others? Will they tolerate the time we spend in preparation?”
“Not likely. But Discord left loopholes to use, and use them I shall.”
"And in the meantime? Will the land remain intact while we prepare? I hear whispers that others are coming that seek to disrupt everything we have strived for."
“I have my sources, dearest sister,” Celestia said. “I don’t think there’s too much to fear for in the year ahead, but he should have plenty of time in this dream zone. Hopefully the one called ‘Marty Stu’ doesn’t accidentally break your barricades before then.”
"We can only hope. Halt, he is awakening."
“What hit me?” I asked, mainly out of confusion. I took a quick look around before slowly sitting up, still confused out of my mind.
“...A bus, maybe?” Celestia replied, wearing a playful grin on her face.
“A bus...oh hardy har har, real funny.” I brought my hand to my face, hoping to massage away my migrane, the reality [or sur-reality] of my situation pretty much negating my comprehension of the severity of the situation of being so close to the mare of my dreams.
And THEN I got a good look at my hand.
Or, more accurately, my hoof...which was riddled with holes.
“OH WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ME!?” I screamed, backpedalling to escape the freakish sight of my mutated AND dessicated limb. Sadly, I really ought to learn to watch where the hell I’m going. Because I wound up backpedalling OFF of the island, and into the endlessly deep void.
Just as I was about to impact the impenetrable blackness where even the sun dare not tread, I felt an intense, excruciating pain....and re-appeared high above the island where I began, looking down to Celestia’s approaching face...and realized I had ‘respawned’ over the endless void...
And ‘de-spawned’ again.
This repeated for what felt like hours, with Celestia laughing harder and harder each time.
“Si-sister! Puh-puh-please m-mo-move his...r-return point,” Celestia finally said between gasps for air.
“Fine...and it was just getting funny.” Luna’s horn glowed, causing the mysterious ‘point’ of spacetime to move over the island with a safe, manageable drop distance. Which is good because I’d probably have broken my neck from the prior height, especially as painful as the sort-ish drop was.
“Okay, what the bloody hell is going on here!?” I screamed, finally climbing back to my...hooves.
“To sum it up, we’re not IN Equestria. Well, we are, but not at the same time. This is your ‘Dream Zone’, an extension of your mind that’s a section of Tel’aran’rhiod,” the sun princess stated.
“What?”
“Tel’aran’rhiod,” she repeated, her voice slipping into the tone of a wise and benevolent teacher. “It’s what’s generally called the realm of dreams. Because of that, this world operates on different laws than our own. For example, one hour in the ‘real world’ is equivalent to twenty-four hours here. Once you finally do come to Equestria, be careful who sleeps near you, as they will also get pulled into the dream world, though that may be beneficial for you eventually. Now, do you want to know why you’re here?”
“Well...yes!” I replied instantly.
“Theodore, you have barely any recollection of who you truly are. With the 24 years you’ll first spend in this dream zone, you will be trained by three heroes from Equis’ past, as I remember them. With their aid, you will relearn some of your most vital skills, and hopefully be prepared for your place in...Well, I’ll explain that later. For now, just know this: if you get hurt here, you will experience the pain in real life...the same goes for if you die under abnormal circumstances, such as in Tel’aran’rhiod proper. No pressure!”
It took a few seconds for that to properly sink into my thoughts. “I’m in deep shit, aren’t I?”
“Well, that’s ONE way of putting it...” She turned to her sister and nods. “By the way, I’ll be coming back once a year by your time to gauge your progress. Take care, Theodore.”
With that the Sun Princess bowed out, replaced by three ponies I never thought I’d see.
The first was a brown-coated earth pony with a spiky brown mane. He carried a bullwhip and rapier, and wore a green bow tie. His cutie mark was a simplistic golden hourglass. His expression was that of an unyielding calm, while his eyes glinted with a manic glee.
The second was a pink-coated, blue-maned pegasus. Her little pink bow on her tail was cute, but her expression of fierceness and defiance seemed more in line with a war veteran or rebellion leader than an adorable pink pony. Her cutie mark was two electric-blue lightning bolts.
The third and final equine was a dusty grey unicorn with a long white beard and mane in a rather comical-looking blue, bell-studded robe and steepled hat. His cutie mark was a star surrounded by a vortex of energy, and his aged expression was one of ancient wisdom and patience deep as the ocean.
Those three were my trainers.
The Doctor, legendary swordsman and mad genius of the Nightmare War.
Firefly, the first Wonderbolt and a mare who defied fate and logic against an ancient evil.
And none other than Starswirl the Bearded, the mightiest conjurer of the Discordian Rebellion.
...This was gonna hurt, wasn’t it?
* * * * *
“You’re not fast enough!”
Whack!
“Almost had it that time!”
Thwack!
“Ew, that would be messy if I were using a sharpened sword!”
Thwack, thwack, THWACK!
The Doctor sent another barraged of blurring sword strikes at me, piercing my defenses as if it were completely nonexistent. Sadly, they technically were. I only had my old guitar as a weapon and no idea how to use any weapons, let alone what was effectively a wooden battleaxe. I had no idea of what I was do-
THWACK!
“You really need to focus,” The Doctor chided, clucking his tongue in mock disapproval. “How do you expect to survive in the thick of battle if you don’t keep your wits about you?”
“...Dumb luck,” I answered. Yes, I was, in fact, being entirely serious. I’ve survived eighty years on sheer dumb luck.
THWACK!
Emphasis on DUMB.
“Oh, come now. What about your own cunning, and wits?” he asked in reply, this time striking at my knees. Miraculously, I managed to block it on my guitar, and push him back. He grinned at me, and said, “You see? In battle, the best weapon doesn’t lie in your body. It lies in your head, in your heart!”
THWACKTHWACKTHWACKTHWACKTHWACK!
“Of course, knowing how to USE your body can be helpful.”
“YA THINK!?” I snarled, still trying to get used to walking on four legs. Add in the fact that I was using a battle-axe which needed TWO legs to even have a chance of using, which this form was clearly not designed for....My body has no OSHA compliance at all.
THWACK!
“Narrating to the readers doesn’t do you any good in battle!”
“...Are you breaking the fourth wall or am I actually speaking out loud to you?”
“...Bit of both.”
* * * * *
KRACKKOOM!
“SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT!” I fell over the edge of the island...AGAIN.
“Not every battle is gonna be a one on one duel, Kiddo,” Firefly said, looking at me with a cold smirk. The pegasus-turned-alicorn-turned-back-into-pegasus was clearly enjoying her ‘artillery escape’ lesson.... She was the artillery, I was the one escaping.
“Ya know, it’s kinda hard to escape artillery if the only safe haven is UNDERNEATH the island! Ya know, where the ENDLESS VOID OF DEATH is!”
“Bah, quit whining and start running, kiddo. Once you get used to moving around, THEN I’ll teach you how to fly.”
“FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-”
KRACKKOOM!
“Let me guess. Firefly?” Starswirl asked, looking at my...less than perfect appearance. I think I could see my spleen lying a couple of feet away from me.
I tried to tell him Yeah, that bitch deep-fried me, eviscerated me, and tore me to pieces...and not in that order, but all that came out was, “Hargghhhle farafle.”
“I’ll take that sickening gurgle you’re making as a ‘yes’,” Starswirl muttered. He took a deep breath, and looked at me with a mixture of wisdom and amusement; a very Dumbledore-y look. “In that case we’ll start with basic healing and bodily repair magic. You’ll need it.”
His horn glowed, and I felt my wounds start to seal up, and mend themselves, powered by what I could only guess was the power of his magic.
He smiled at my expression of astonishment, and gestured to my newly healed body. “Not many true practitioners remember this, but...Magic isn’t just power. It isn’t just something you pick up in a book, that you can use automatically. Magic, in itself, is one of life’s purest forms. To truly use magic, you don’t just have to know how to use it. You have to believe in what you’re doing.” To emphasize his point, his magic swept through my body once more, dulling the pain, and filling me with a sense of...
I think the best word for it was life.
Starswirl stroked his beard, and offered me a hoof. I gratefully grasped it in my own, and he hauled me to my feet. Erm, hooves.
“Contrary to popular belief, but...everypony can use magic. As I said, it’s a force of life. And all creatures, be they the smallest changeling, or fiercest dragon, hold some measure of life within them. It’s in the air you breath, in the ground you walk on,” he continued, tapping my chest gently with his hoof. “That’s why I’m not going to teach you how to use magic...”
Oddly, I didn’t feel disappointed at hearing that.
“Instead, I’m going to teach you why you use magic, where it comes from. For in the end, all of your victories will have come from your heart. Your laughter, my young Knightmare, holds more magic than any firestorm that I could conjure. That is why I suspect what you take from my lessons shall be vital to your very destiny...So...shall we begin?”
I nodded vigorously.
“Excellent,” he chuckled. “Now, allow me to tell you about an old story they used to tell me of when I was but a foal...”
* * * * *
“So, Knightmare,” Celestia asked. “How’s the year been?”
“Honestly,” I replied, using my dampened fingers to douse the flame on my fin-mane-thing. She’s calling me Knightmare? Not a bad name. I’ll take it “I’ve survived worse...and I’d like to believe I’m actually improving.”
“Honestly, Celly, the fact that he’s even ALIVE right now is promising,” Firefly added, earning rolled eyes from her fellow legends.
“Well, a living champion tends to get more done than a dead one. And undead are, technically, not allowed by the game’s rules,” Starswirl pointed out.
“I’d hope so. That’d be cheating with the whole ‘last one alive’ thing being the goal...” The Doctor muttered the last part underneath his breath.
“Exactly...” Celestia muttered, looking a tad perturbed.
“Yeah, well...Ugh. sorry about the...mess. We tried to get back one of my memories just before you arrived.” I waved my hands in the general direction of a bridge that Firefly was dousing with water.
“It was some creature called a ‘Creeper’, milady,” StarSwirl said, “It, well...it explodes when it gets close. He wasn’t paying attention when he was coming back for supplies.”
“....Coulda been worse.”
“Aye, Starswirl, remember the fiasco with that first memory chest?” Doctor Whooves added.
*****Flashback!*****
“I DON’T LIKE THIS IDEA, FIREFLY!” I screamed, hanging on for dear life from a vine...attached to a floating rock barely bigger than my head, DANGEROUSLY close to a flow of magma that was coming from, literally, nowhere. I could see the top and there was no source for it.
“Look, kiddo, you need to find your memories and THIS is your best bet for tracking the damn things down.” The irritable, and irritating pegasus called out, flittering about a few dozen feet behind me, in the comfortably cool air away from the PHYSICS DEFYING SPOUT OF LAVA WITHIN ARMS REACH OF ME!
So when I felt I couldn’t get a better swing, I let loose......and promptly caught the vine with my foot, because it was MUCH closer than I thought, and wound up being flung INTO the lava I was just attempting to get away from.....
You can guess how much THAT hurt when I respawned.....
*****End Flashback*****
“Well...there IS always next time.” Celestia said, stepping back through the veil to reality....