Unfortunately for Gilda, she was not able to reach the hotel in time for her to avoid the press. Somehow, possibly through tapped phones (which was highly illegal, considering Princess Celestia’s media laws against slander, libel, and personal privacy), a few media dogs received word of the hotel she would be staying in for her time in Ponyville. The doctor made the arrangements ahead of time through magic lettering transportation, but nothing was signified until Gilda signed the papers at the front desk. When Gilda and the doctor caught a glimpse of the paparazzi outside the hotel, they tried their hand at sneaking around the back entrance. However, that still did not stop the paparazzi from recognizing her at the front desk. Even in her get up (a poncho, provided for by the doctor due to the incredible rain happening that day) someone was able to see Gilda’s signature beak, tail, and feathers. As she was signing the papers, she heard someone shout “Gilda!” as an autonomic reaction, she turned to greet whoever called her name. She was welcomed with a flashbulb to the face.
Before she could even comprehend what had happened, her picture of her at the front desk, miserable, wet, and shocked, was blasted throughout all the TV news programs and newspapers of Equestria. Stories began like wildfire. If anyone was linked to it, they became media stars over night. Even the doctor was placed on the spot, and unfortunately, in some circumstances, was linked as her lover. This was disproven almost immediately, for the doctor was married and had three children. But it didn’t matter. At the rate the story was being flung around, overnight, everyone knew who Gilda was and where she was staying.
But as for Rainbow Dash, she had no time for TV. She was too busy with her morning workout routine to flip on the television or grab an early copy of the newspaper. Imagined how shocked she was to find several reporters outside her door, and how one of the first questions out of their mouths was “Are you related to Gilda Griffon?”
Her response contained that tomboyish charm. “Who’s asking?” she replied.
One of the reporters introduced themselves and explained that Gilda was the sole survivor of the 411 train crash on route to Ponyville and that she was miraculously unharmed; to which Rainbow Dash responded, “……..she came back?” and then it hit her. “Sweet Celestia…….she’s back!”
When Gilda awoke the next day, in her hotel bed, she realized that the pillow under her was wet with tears from the previous night before. She couldn’t remember much, except that she had passed out crying last night. She of course remembered the generous doctor, and made a mental note to repay him somehow, someway.
But something big was troubling her. She still did not feel that intense burning sadness. She of course, felt tired, like most do when waking from a night of sleeping in and intense anxiety. But she did not feel that depression, that emptiness, like she usually did when waking up. It felt odd, feeling tired, yet comfortable waking up. It felt like that whatever that was going to happen today, it was all meant to be, that she somehow was finally honing in on her calling, that mysterious destiny the doctor referred to.
She left the bed, and showered in silence. She stayed in the shower for what seemed like forever. Actually, it was only about 15 minutes. She just stood there, one talon placing itself onto the wall to balance her as she stood up on her back legs. She simply let the water wash over her. She didn’t even bother using shampoo. She simply just wanted to feel what it would be like standing out in the rain today; cold, bleak, and hopeless, yet feeling confused.
She decided what she really needed, was a drink, to help her get her mind off of things. On top of that, she also had to consider what was going to happen next. She had been fired from her job two days before she decided to return from Ponyville. Her wallet had been lost in the train fire, apparently. She was alone, in a hotel room being paid for by a very generous stranger, with no money, no way to call her friends, and surrounded by thousands of ponies wanting to take her picture. She couldn’t necessarily live in the hotel for the rest of her life. She had to find a place to stay. She had to find a quick way to get money fast to get back home. Then she had to find a job to keep paying off the rent on her apartment back in Filidelphia. How could she do it? Where could she stay? Did she even want to go back? What if it was Filidelphia that was causing her inner turmoil? All these questions, along with her newfound sense of belonging which felt increasingly awkward, persuaded herself to don a hoodie to disguise herself, and head on down to the hotel bar, to numb the pain with the finest Vodka she could buy. After all, the charitable doctor was paying for it. She deviously smiled when this thought entered her head. It was so wrong, and yet…..so right; just like the old days.
But that got her thinking about Rainbow Dash, and then that got her thinking about her upcoming apology. She still felt that in her heart, she would be rejected by her once truest friend. But before she could even apologize to Dash, she had to find her.
It seemed as if though fate where to have its special way with Gilda. She would not find Rainbow Dash and her friends. Au contraire me frere. They would find her.
It happened at the hotel bar, approximately an hour after Gilda left her room. She had been causally sipping her alcoholic beverage, watching the ponies interact in the hotel lobby. It was a strange sight. She found that observation of social interactions was fascinating. Some ponies, like her, moved with their head hung low, their speech condensed, trying to avoid conversation. She felt like reaching out and lending a hand; being a comforting soul who had once before been in that line of battle. Other times, some ponies were just too busy to talk. The ordered their food, ate and left. Of course there were couples, parents, children, and many others to witness. But at one point, her observation got sidetracked when she felt somepony sit down to the bar stool right next to her.
Her peripheral vision caught the neon blue fur and rainbow mane.
She was frozen solid. Gilda didn’t know why, but as soon as Rainbow Dash sat down right next to her, she tried to avoid her. She kept her eyes glancing the other way. The talon gripped the glass tightly. She was under so much pressure, to keep herself from being noticed. Maybe it was just her conscience trying to keep the eventual confrontation from happening. The more time she had not being rejected, the better.
Ironically enough, Rainbow Dash was completely oblivious to Gilda’s presence right next her. Even her friends, the mane six (now five), as they grouped around her, were blind by the hooded griffon close by. The conversation between the friends was very revealing, and perked Gilda’s attention immediately.
“It’s useless,” Rainbow Dash sighed. The sighed transformed into a groan as she leaned her neck back and faced the ceiling. “We can’t find her anywhere.”
“This should be the place,” The orange one proclaimed. Gilda had a hard time figuring out what her name was. She was a farm pony, so her rational guess was that her name dealt with oranges.
“The Hooftin hotel chain is very glamorous,” stated the egotistical white one with the purple mane. “Just look at the marvelous chandelier on the ceiling.” Gilda unconsciously looked up for about a quarter of a second to notice the chandelier. Yeah, it was nice. She looked back down. “Don’t you agree Applejack?” The purple mane one continued.
“Uh yeah Rarity, now’s not the time to think about high decorating standards, if you don’t mind me being so bold,” Applejack stated. As the names were being tossed around, Gilda began adding them into her head, and pairing them with each individual. She knew Dash. The orange one was apparently Applejack which caused her to chuckle mentally for that totally went against the orange farmer assumption. The white one was Rarity.
“Yeah, we need to find that big meanie!” The pink twerp said with her overly high and squeaky voice.
Dash groaned as she held a hoof to her temple, looking like she was experiencing a bad headache. “Pinkie Pie,” Dash stated. “You really need to lay off Gilda.”
Ok, so the pink twerp was coincidently named Pinkie Pie. She remembered now.
“Uh….if-if-if you don’t mind me asking….. I mean- I don’t want to be mean……or….anything……you know…. It-it-‘s just….wh-wh-why sh-should we? I mean-she was very rude to us last time.” This came softly from the yellow pony with the long pink mane.
“Well, for one thing Fluttershy,” Rainbow Dash retorted as Gilda placed the name into her conscience. “There are a lot of things that you don’t know about Gilda that I know. I was Gilda’s roommate for the flight academy and I can tell you that she did a lot of good things for me. She’s not a bad person…..she’s just……..confused. That’s all.”
“Ok,” Applejack asked Dash inquisitively with a glaring eye. “Name one thing that we don’t know about Gilda that you know.”
This enticed Gilda. She had thousands of things she could list off, but she still resorted to keeping her beak shut. She was quite interested in how this scenario would play out. What would Dash use to defend Gilda.
Rainbow Dash, looking at her friends square in the face, retorted with vigor, slowly yet quietly, “She saved my life.”
An intense shroud of silence immediately surrounded them. A pin could’ve been dropped a mile away and all of the girl’s could’ve picked it up. Gilda, out of all of them, was on the edge of her seat the most. She knew exactly what Dash was referring to, and felt that if she didn’t leave soon, she would burst. But she couldn’t leave. She felt like she was sucked into some kind of strange tractor beam.
Rarity was the one who broke the silence. “Saved your life? What in Equestria’s name are you talking about?”
And finally, Gilda could hold it in no longer. She didn’t shout it, she didn’t yell it, but she got close to doing so in volume range. “The Cart Accident.”
Rainbow Dash turned her head to face the stranger who piped in. When she recognized Gilda, she became powerfully silent as her eyes grew wide. Applejack’s, Pinkie Pie’s, and Rarity’s jaw could’ve touched the floor. Fluttershy was somehow able to hang her head lower than it already was.
Gilda felt stupid for speaking out. But there was no going back. She had to tell them now. But first, she needed to finish the story. Breathing out heavily, once she turned around and wiped the crust from her eyes, she began to do so. She spoke calm, with reserve, but the fervor of her words were so powerful, that it left the ponies even more shocked and amazed than they were when they realized that Gilda was right next to them.
Gilda was silent, trying her best to say the story in the best possible way. Then, she told it like it was. “During our last year in the flight school, me and Dash went to this bon fire out near Everfree forest.” She did her best to describe the scene. She also did not forget to mention that she was on the varsity stormball team, and so it was almost required for her to attend and to bring along a friend. “Some hard liquored Cider was passed around, so were other beverages and……substances. We basically left the place in no condition to drive, so we called a cab.”
Now came the hard part. She involuntarily gulped before she spoke up again.
“Apparently the driver was unable to resist our feminine wails, asking for him to go faster. Cause he did, right up until he smacked that tree, killing himself upon impact. As for me, last thing I remembered was being thrown from the cart through the windshield……..when I came to……at-at the hospital….I found out that Dash wasn’t thrown to the cart be-because I……..coaxed her into putting her seatbelt on before we asked the driver to go faster…….and the sad part is……I don’t even remember doing it……”
Her eyes were becoming shrink-wrapped with tears, and Dash noticed them when Gilda turned to face her.
“I saved you life,” Gilda stated. “and I don’t even remember doing it……..I’m a…..I’m a terrible-”
Dash stopped her before she could even finish. “NO!” she proclaimed, pointing. “You were never a terrible friend……..you were always one of my best friends…..and although you can’t recall that night…..I will forever. And I have no one but you to thank.”
A silence fell amongst them once more. This time, it was Pinkie who came with the outburst.
“Well…….this is awkward,” she said.
“Listen,” Gilda stated articulately. “I came back here to apologize, but there’s so much more I need to tell ya. I can’t do it here because…..it’s…….I just can’t do it here. But if we walk out that front door, the paparazzi will swarm us like parasprites.”
The logical solution was to head back to Gilda’s room. But after Gilda explained the doctor situation, they understood why she probably wanted to get out of the good stallion’s hair. Gilda stated the obvious after that when she asked, “Is there any place we can go that’s more……private?”
Using the Hotel’s telephone, Applejack arranged for her brother to pick them up by the back of the hotel and take them to the farm. Being from the country, Applejack realized they would have all the privacy they would need. It was a bit of a long trip, but it shouldn’t be any more than 30 minutes tops. The down side effect was ever since the passing of Granny Smith some two years ago, Applebloom always had to be watched over by Big Mac. So, evidently, Applebloom was coming along too. The 5 ponies laughed amongst themselves knowing that she would be in for a surprise once she would catch sight of Gilda. The Griffon only smirked in shrugged.
However, she was in for a surprise too. For she had never met Applejack’s brother. She heard in passing from the 5 that he was a strong stallion, and Rarity added a handsome one at that. However, at the time, Gilda really didn’t care. As long as he was bringing a ride, he was alright in her book.
Once he did arrive, carrying the cart behind his back, Gilda was spellbound.
After staring at the muscular pony for quite some time, she realized that the only words floating by her brain were ‘hubba hubba.’ She also realized that someone in return was looking at her. She turned to find Rainbow Dash with the biggest smirk on her face.
“What?” Gilda asked somewhat defensively.
“I’ve seen that look before,” Rainbow Dash teased.
Gilda began to blush and look away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“You totally want to jump Big Mac’s bones,” Dash coaxed.
“I do not!” Gilda returned like a small school filly denying a playground crush.
“Yeah you do,” Dash slowly drew out humorously.
Gilda was never one for throwing on masks. And so, her façade broke, and with a small grin, she admitted, “Ok. Maybe a little.”
Suddenly, a new voice piped in, and apparently, it came from the ground. “WOW!”
Both Gilda and Rainbow Dash looked down to notice a yellow pony with a red mane and bright red bow on her head. Rainbow Dash immediately recognized her as Applebloom. Gilda made the connection from the news given to her earlier by Applejack. She saw the family resemblance, and she could practically hear it in that thick southern accent.
Applebloom was awestruck. She just stared right up at Gilda, with bright eyes and a gaped open mouth. “You’re tall…….you must play basketball!”
Gilda chuckled. The kid was, actually kind of cute. “Stormball kid but…..close. It’s almost like basketball. Actually, I’m trying to be a distance swimmer.”
This left Applebloom confused, as she proceeded to show Gilda a face that a dog would show when shown a card trick. Rainbow Dash just started laughing. Gilda turned to the cyan blue pony and nudged her side with her elbow, finishing the joke. “I have a natural fear of water though. I think that might be the problem.”
The two joined the rest of the ponies on the back of the wagon, altogether laughing. To Gilda it felt…..nostalgic; reminiscent of the old days back at flight school, where the two would stay up half the night just talking and cracking jokes, trying to get the other one to stay up longer. Those were the days. Her sadness was with her then, but with Dash, that sadness seemed almost distant; null and void due to their friendship.
It was about halfway home that Gilda realized something. She decided to bring it up, even though it seemed like she would be stating the obvious.
“Hey……aren’t there suppose to be six of you guys including Dash?” Gilda asked curiously.
Coldness overwhelmed them all. Dread was in the faces of everypony on that wagon. A mournful silence encapsulated them and Gilda realized that she must’ve said something terribly wrong. A sniffle was heard and everyone turned to their left to see Pinkie trying to hold back the tears. It didn’t work out. Big Mac stopped the cart and Pinkie hopped off the back and began to weep deeply and bitterly. Fluttershy came to her side to consol her.
Applejack watched the situation with that same somber loss that was happening within Pinkie’s heart. She turned to see Gilda, utterly flabbergasted. The pony sighed, and then explained.
“It’s ok…….you didn’t know,” Applejack grew silent and looked away for a while, feeling sorrowful and sadden by the fact that she vicariously had to relive the experience of the loss by telling Gilda about it. “You see……Twilight Sparkle was our sixth friend……she’s…..she’s been gone for quite a while……”
“…dead?” Gilda supplied.
“Well….we don’t know,” Applejack stated. “She’s been missing for the past 4 years……ever since…….ever since she went to the hospital………she….she uh…….she tried to kill herself. ….Spike, her assistant found her in the corner of the library bleeding out. She was fixed just in time only to talk to Princess Celestia for a bit…..which we never got to see. And then, the next day, she was gone. The papers were signed and we haven’t seen her since.”
Gilda was extremely shocked about all the information she received; even more so, realizing that she would be providing an almost similarly darker story to the 5 once they arrived at the barn.
“I probably shouldn’t tell you my story once we reach the barn then,” Gilda said.
Applejack shot her a look of confusion. “And why’s that?”
Once they were in the barn, Gilda told them everything. She told them about the intense sadness she had experienced all her life, even during flight school. She told them about the neglectful mother and the abusive drunken father she grew up with, and how after once incident in which she was tied to a bed post and beaten half to death, she was taken away and placed into foster care. She talked about the many nights in that orphanage when she thought about ending it all. She talked about how at flight school, when she met Dash, how that darkness, that sadness, got demised to almost nothing. She talked about getting her security guard job back home, and how she would only look forward to the days her and Dash would hang out. She talked about the fear she experienced when she realized Dash had more friends. She talked about how she was afraid she would be all alone again, and how that darkness would come back. She told them that this was not meant to justify her actions. She told them how she was wrong. She told them about that night before coming back, holding the blade close to her skin. And most importantly, she told them that she was sorry, so sorry, and super sorry over and over again.
Once Gilda was finished, Rainbow Dash, knowing Gilda, realized that there was only one thing left unsaid. “What now?”
“I don’t know,” Gilda stated as she rubbed the back of her neck. “I mean, I know that the apartment isn’t fully paid off but….honestly…..I really don’t want to go back.”
“Why’s that?” Rarity asked.
“It’s just….” Gilda tried to explain as best as she could. “It’s just that, for the past two days, although the circumstances have been extremely odd, I…..haven’t felt the….emptiness. I don’t know if it was the city causing it…..or if being here with you guys is the cure for it. But regardless, I don’t think I want to go back for a long time. Besides, that still doesn’t change the fact that I’m jobless, homeless, and broke at the moment.”
Rainbow Dash sighed disappointingly into her hooves as she stretched out her eye lids. “Gilda, I would let you stay at my place but…..”
Gilda cringed. She knew that something would be between them. However, once she learned exactly who it was, she was honestly surprised and happy for Rainbow Dash to be in the position she was in at the moment.
“I’m currently dating someone and……the guest bedroom has been changed into a bigger workout area….he’s……he’s a wonder bolt.”
Gilda’s eyes shot up. “That’s great!” she said with a smile. “If you can’t beat em or join them, I say screw one of them.”
The six laughed together full heartedly. It was a much needed laugh.
Eventually though, the dying died down and they were back to the situation. What to do with Gilda. “So……where can you stay, if you don’t mind me asking?” Fluttershy inquisitively asked.
Suddenly, a voice piped in from down the far side of the barn, near the entrance. “uhh, pardon the interruption ladies,” the low baritone voice stated.
The six turned their heads to see Big Macintosh. He seemed to be very interested in what they were talking about, more importantly who they were talking about, as self evident by the few looks that Big Mac flashed towards Gilda.
“Now, Applejack,” Big Mac said as he walked forwards towards them. “Forgive me for suggesting this but…..why not let her stay here?”
This puzzled Applejack for a couple of moments. “I beg’yer pardon?”
“Yeah I mean,” Big Mac continued graciously. “We live right under Cloudsdale so miss…..Oh. I’m so sorry. Forgive me but I didn’t catch your name,” Big Mac told Gild.
“It’s G-Gilda,” the griffon clucked out with a bit of a blush. She heard a small cackle and automatically realized it came from Rainbow Dash. The griffon only wished she could flip her off at that moment.
“Gilda, beautiful name,” the red stallion stated, causing the heat in Gilda’s face to intensify. “Anyways, we live Right under Rainbow Dash so you two can visit each other every day. And AJ, we can always us extra hoofs…or in this case, talons around the orchard. And, we still have that extra room ever since Granny Smith’s passing so….why not?”
The more AJ thought about it, the more she realized it made perfect since. “I don’t see why not,” AJ confessed. “I mean, it seems perfect.” She then focused her attention towards Gilda. “We can feed you and give you a place to stay for as long as you like and all you’d have to do is help out here and there when needed. You won’t have to do nothing for the moment. Apple-bucking season doesn’t start till two months from now. But, is that ok?”
“Yeah, certainly,” Gilda replied. Then she turned her head to Big Mac. “Is that ok?”
Big Mac responded with his signature. “Eeyup.”
That night, Gilda had dinner with the Apple family, and saw what a true family looked and acted liked. The dinner was good, which all three prepared together (taters and grits with a main course of apple dumplings. They were able to find some old tuna for Gilda, which satisfied her completely and then some). They talked about many things to each other, but all the conversations lead on one particular theme. Each one was heavily invested with the other and wanted to know how their day went because if they had a good day, it meant the other had a great day. All in all, Gilda realized what they truly were; a family. It only made her wish that her family was like that.
After dinner, they went into the main living room, and Gilda realized they had no Television. They usually played games with each other or read Applebloom a story before it was time to go to bed. Applebloom however, was getting to old for bedtime stories and instead asked if Big Mac could play his harmonica. This added an even bigger blush on Gilda’s face as she suddenly realized the big, muscular stallion with a long flowing gold mane was skillful with his mouth and hooves.
She gained an even bigger attraction to him, when she realized that he was a big blues fanatic just as much as she was. This lead to a playful argument about which blues musician was better: Howlin’ Diamond Dog, or Duck Berry.
When it was time for bed, Gilda realized that she wasn’t going to get much sleep. She noticed then, when she thought about how great of a family they were. She realized how much greater of a family they probably were back when Granny Smith, and the two parents were alive. She realized that death could sometimes divide and even ruin families.
And then she thought about how many families were now affected due to the 411 train derailing.
Applejack noticed Gilda’s room was still lit when she was passing by back to her room on her way from the restroom. She tilted the door just a smidgen, and noticed Gilda curled up into a ball on the bed, back knees brought up to her chest.
“Gilda,” Applejack asked softly. “Yall alright?”
Gilda sniffed and wiped away the tears from her eyes. “No,” she responded.
Applejack slowly entered the room and closed the door lightly behind her. “Let’s talk,” Applejack stated. A silence fell amongst them before Gilda finally came out with a question she was dying to ask.
“Applejack,” she asked sincerely. “Have you ever believed in ‘destiny?’?”
The earth pony thought about it for a moment. “Once and a while, yeah. But I tend not to think about such deep things.”
Gilda continued with her story. “I don’t know why I survived that crash two days ago. All I know is……is that it’s gotta mean something. But as to what it is, I don’t know. It’s tearing me apart on the inside knowing that thousands of innocent people died and I survived and I have no clue why.”
“You can’t think like that,” Applejack told her. “You’re only going to beat yourself up thinking such thoughts. What you really need to focus on is this. Things happened, for better or for worse, they happened. Whether they mean something or not, it doesn’t help to reflect on it when it’s already happened. The truth of whatever this is will reveal itself soon, but as of right now, you just gotta think that it’s better to be living, than to be dead.”
Gilda hung her head low. She told Applejack that she was right, but that still didn’t excuse from the fact that she was here, and somehow, she felt that she didn’t deserve to be. She leaned towards the orange earth pony who hugged her, and cried into her shoulder’s asking why exactly was she still alive.
She fell asleep crying.
A/N: I originally was going to split this up into two chapters of 2000 or so words, but I decided to mush it toghether. What do you like better? short chapters like the last one, or long one's such as this? more to come.