Counting Cinders
Sunset
We made it. I wasn't certain I could teleport so far with another pony, even with the pre-prepared array and beacon. I let out a breath that I had been holding. Canterlot Castle fell. To whom I was unsure but they would regret it. Celestia would return to her castle. To save the Ponies that she so cared for. To avenge her fallen soldiers. To protect the Ponies she still loved. To rescue the Princess that she had left behind. The Princess I had all but foal napped.
Speaking of foal-napped Princesses. I looked at the pink Alicorn that was still draped around me. Her eyes were closed and after a quick spell, she did appear to be unconscious. Gulping down the panic and setting it ablaze. I immediately untangled myself from the Princess throwing my sack and saddlebag into the stone wall of the cave. I turned my full attention to the pony that came with me.
Grasping her in my magic and slowly moved her to the bed I had prepared years ago. I doubted my past self would have expected any other Pony to use it let alone be in this cave. Shaking my head to clear those thoughts, I refocused on the infant goddess. More specifically her wounded wing.
Four jagged tears ran through it, as she continued to bleed from the jagged gaps in her flesh and feathers. Running through every cleaning spell I knew that all that remained was the mangled flesh and feathers. I summoned a bundle of cloth and held it to the wounds while I magicked it stuck. Celestia would have my head for daring to use a sticking spell like this.
She would have my head for a number of reasons. Here I was in the wilderness of Canterlot after absconding with her newest Princess. Leaving behind burned corpses and ashes in the castle that she calls home. I wonder what her reaction was going to be when she returned and found the altar I had constructed out of her enemies.
Would she look upon it and realize that I had once more failed? That I was but one more pony in her immortal life that refused to listen to the words that she spoke? That I had left the remnants of her guards to be butchered by the various groups that had attacked the castle, all in an effort to steal away the Alicorn of Love.
I could taste the blood from the most recent Griffon as it ran down my muzzle and into my grinning mouth. That pathetic creature deserved the fate I had delivered upon it for daring to attack an Alicorn. One that was named the niece of the goddess of the Sun herself. Watching it be incinerated in my mind's eye once more was almost therapeutic.
Turning towards the still-suspended Alicorn I had in my clutches. Defenseless and without any protection. I would be able to reave her wings from her form. Rip into her mind and claim the right to ascension for myself. Celestia would never know. She would have easily just thought that the newest Alicorn had perished in the attack. After all, she was the one that had so hurriedly left. Leaving her oh-so-precious ponies alone while she went chasing after some element.
Like she always said I should take advantage of what others give me. She herself had just given me the perfect opportunity to ascend. I could survive here for weeks if not months, all without any other pony knowing where I was. The newest Princess will provide the knowledge and the resources I need from her mind and flesh. I would take care to preserve her sanity until the final steps in my ascension so that she for once in her life contributes something to me instead of once more stealing my destiny.
I would become an Alicorn. Celestia’s equal. One that she would never be able to once more abandon. I would be with her for countless eternities. The two of us are together forever more. Just as we always should have been. Just as we always will. My eyes focus on the sleeping being more specifically the pained grimace that rested upon her muzzle. The patches of blood that still clung to her mane. Staining the bright rainbow, dark red.
“Ponies have always thought the worst of you, right? Use this to prove them wrong. To show them that you are more than the demon that they think you are.” Her unconscious form whispered in a vain attempt to save itself. Did it not understand that I was by destiny's own decree, fated to become an Alicorn? That for every moment I did not ascend I would potentially lose Celestia once more?
That I would be lost to the ravages of time, leaving Celestia to forget me. To have her replace me. To be once more nothing in the face of the Alicorn of the Sun. To have no pony care for me. Much less the only pony that gave me a chance. The one pony that saved me from the ice and cold? The one that shared her warmth with me?
No. Immediately my magic lept to my desire as she was spread out in the air. I would take what was my right. There was no pony in Equus or beyond that would stop me from claiming my wings. From ascending and becoming Celestia’s equal. From becoming the true daughter of the Sun.
“Please Sunset.” She once more whispered right before I would have severed her wings from her form. She dared? SHE DARED TO DENY ME? I was Sunset Shimmer and I would take what I was owed. It is what she took from me. I was the one that had been stolen from. My fate. My destiny. Celestia’s love. She had taken them all from me. I could have them all back. I just needed to continue.
I waited for the next plea of the soon-to-be meat puppet, but only silence came from the unconscious pony.
“Not going to attempt to save yourself anymore Princess? Have you realized that the only thing you can do to make up for what you have taken from me is to return it tenfold?” I questioned the strung-up pony. She still didn't wake. WHY? “AREN'T YOU GOING TO DEFEND YOURSELF YOU PATHETIC EXCUSE OF AN ALICORN!” I bellowed at the Pony that still clung in my grasp.
Flames began to sprout across the room as my magic lept to defend me from the pony that refused to defend itself. Refused to give me a reason to spare it. Refused to apologize for its transgressions. The Alicorn of Love, still silently detained in my magic. In my hideaway, because I had saved her.
Things would have been so much easier if I had ignored her back at Canterlot Castle. I could have continued to defend the few guards I had saved. I could have always retreated here whenever the tide of battle was to turn. But no. When she reappeared I went to her. Found her being attacked by a creature that didn't realize how stupid its actions were.
I quickly taught it the error of its ways. When I took it apart limb by limb. Erasing a portion of its body at a time with my flames. Bringing it back to consciousness to once more experience the pain it had earned. Only finally extinguishing its life when it went so mad it started to ramble about the ‘nightmare’ saving it. I proved that for all the terrors found in dreams, I was the reality it had wrought.
I then brought her into my room. My sanctuary. Which I swore she would never enter. Then furthering the foolishness of my actions I brought her with me. WHY? She should have died at the castle. The only reason she still lived is that I saved her. I glared at the Alicorn that should have perished and continued my foolishness that would lead to my death.
Carefully lowering her onto the bed, ensuring that her wing was not underneath any portion of her body. I calmed myself and quickly killed the flames and heat that had surged with my rage. Ignoring the chill that the charm had once more provided me as I looked at the recovering Alicorn.
She should live, as long as she awoke from this slumber. If her wing got infected I would have to find some pony to save it. Taking one final glance at the defenseless creature that deserved the torture that awaited it.
“Thank you for trusting me.” She once more whispered. Taunting me. All but throwing the decision I had made back into my face.
“I hate you,” I growled back to the still-unconscious pink pony. Turning from the Alicorn before I would once more change my mind about my current actions I instead began to look throughout the hideaway I had long ago prepared. It had been some time since I was last here. What was it about three years ago I set this getaway up? Close enough. With that taken care of I continued on my task to check over the stored supplies.
Rummaging through the various barrels that I had appropriate from the Cel- Princess Celestia’s castle and the guard rations that I had purloined. There would have been plenty of food if it was just me. However, with my newest… guest, and her Alicorn-sized appetite I would have to go foraging or find a local village. I should have found one when I was previously setting up this bolt-hole of mine. Hindsight was cast in perfect clarity, however.
I would make do with what I had, regardless. Making my way to the entrance of the cave and checking over the array of spells. Over the time I had not been here about half of them had degraded to almost unusable levels. Shows what happens when I rush things. Sighing I began to rework the spell matrix restoring it and improving it with the new tricks and knowledge I had since picked up.
Anti-scrying defenses were a must, especially if Princess Celestia was to come looking for her newest fancy. What was this-. Oh yes, I remember this charm. I was a deviously evil filly. Chuckling at my own designs I restored the little charm that would make creatures experience hallucinations the closer they got to the cave. After all, most of the stupid animals around here would be chased off by their own shadows, ponies included.
After a rather enjoyable hour of refreshing the wards, I once more looked back at the Princess that I had brought with me. Still unconscious on the bed. Wings, ripe for the taking. Knowledge of ascension sitting uselessly in her skull. Just waiting for me to crack it open. All I had to do was-.
Ripping my head back from her form I put one hoof in front of the other as I made my way into the forest that surrounded this cave.
Entering into the silent night the Mare on the Moon is on display high above. Watching from her prison. Eventually, a cloud covered the Moon and I continued on with my task. It would prove prudent to ensure that the river I remembered was still here. Ignoring the broiling of shades that slipped from behind the trees as they traced my movements. I would take my blessings where I could.
Making it to where my memories claimed a river once ran I felt a burning desire to go back in time and strangle myself. Glaring upon an empty riverbed. Fine. I could summon water myself. It would provide plenty of practice with that spell. Huffing and kicking a rock into the now riverless riverbed, I continued on. I could at least check to see if any manticores or any other creature I could incinerate were around.
Hours passed as I traipsed through the forest. Finding little but trees and flowers. Not a single opportunity to incinerate a creature that could attempt to harm me. It wasn't as if I could just start a forest fire. Well, I could, but the last time I had done so Princess Celestia had been rather displeased with me. She however wasn't here. I could do whatever it was that I wanted. I was no longer beholden to her will.
Forced to play to her rules. Bowing my head to her every whim and fancy. Allowing myself to be strung along by the Princess that had forsaken me. I was free for the moment. Free to light Canterlot ablaze with my flames. All I had to do was let go. Let the flames out to feast and embrace the warmth. A single spark. A single cinder. Properly placed and the surrounding plant life would bloom into a beautiful flame.
I would provide a beacon to all that wished to harm me. Where they could find their prey. Where I would meet them upon a sea of flame and ash. A battle fought in flames and blood. Where I would perish within a torrent of flames. Bringing them with me into the endless tundra. To suffer evermore. A proper ending for a demon. Forever lost to the cold. With the warmth forever forsaken.
I could taste the flames upon my tongue. My blood blazing in desire for desolation. All it would take is a singular thought and I could end the tale of the Alicorn and Unicorn. It would be an ending that I chose. Not Princess Celestia. Not the Parasite. Not even the shades that I had long suffered under. I would be the one to end the tale.
NO. I reflexively spun the cooling charm. Smothering the flames that leaped forth. The frost once more smothered my flame, ice once more binding me. Embraced no longer by the warmth, but by the uncaring chill. I watched in creeping horror as a singular spark fueled by my hate rushed to escape the uncaring end that I had brought it. Reaching for another source of fuel.
Even in my muddled state, I brought it back. Flames were mine to command. I was the one that brought it into this world and I would be the one to extinguish its light. It fruitlessly fought against my will.
Was this what I looked like to Princess Celestia? Searching for a way to escape the cold that once provided warmth? Unknown to the little flame how utterly pointless it was in the grand scheme. Its only purpose is accomplished. Now set to be smothered. Forgotten. Forsaken.
Snarling I brought the flame a quick death. Ignoring the taste of iron as I spat it upon the ground. I would ascend. Show her the error of her ways. That I would not be extinguished. Glaring at the fragments of light that began to sprout from the Dawn. My promise was kept. I teleported back to the cave.
Watching. Observing. An unconscious, and utterly defenseless Alicorn. Waiting for any sign of degradation of the parasite's condition. If it was to perish I would take what it owed. Wings. Knowledge. Warmth.
I heard an all too familiar tearing of flesh from behind me. I however ignored the show. I had seen the forming of the parasite’s shade and I would see it evermore. The shades had found another that they used as much as the Sun herself. Finally, the rending of flesh stopped and the sound of hooves upon stone began. A single haltingly slow step at a time.
I could feel it staring me down. I would not fall for the bait that it provided. I would not miss the perishing of my foe. Of the insect that dared to steal Princess Celestia from me. The-. My thoughts died a horrid death as a warm wing placed itself on my back. My head twisted.
There the shade of the parasite was. A singular shadowed wing was placed on me. I glared at the shade waiting for the inevitable torture. Waiting for the wa-. Why was the parasite’s shade warm? Even Princess Celestia’s shade was a creature that extinguished all warmth. Yet this one, the shade of the parasite, was now warm?
Wrenching my gaze from the wing that almost covered me. I focused on the black pools of empty thoughts. Nothing more than just a shade. No spark of intelligence. Only focused on the one that it was set to torture. Then why was it warm? Where were its brethren? Ever since I awoke from my injuries the only one I had seen coalesce into a pony was the parasites. Has my punishment changed? Did Princess Celestia think that a singular shade of the parasite would finally break me?
I had lasted for far longer against the hordes of shifting shades. I had survived Princess Celestia’s own shade butchering me. I would survive the warmth of a singular shade. Even if it was the parasites. I would not be felled before I could ascend.
The shade almost as if hearing my thoughts began to smile. A smile that I swore could have been placed upon the parasite’s own mouth. The shade’s empty eyes met mine as it stepped forth. Encircling me with its wings. Upon setting the shade ablaze and teleporting out of its grasp I watched as it slowly turned once more to face me.
Its mouth opened promising unwhisperable delights. It moved. Blurring into the shadows and darkness that survived despite my flames. Reappearing above the parasite itself. “Oh? What is this?” Did the shade truly believe I cared for its originator? I sent a spear of flame hurtling into its side. Even after I obliterated its form, I knew that it would simply reform. However with the words that were next spoken I felt far more pain than any shade’s claws against my flesh. The parasite’s purple eyes flickered open. Confusion and fear were written across them. Then it saw me. Its eyes DARED to soften, as the fear fled.
“Sunset? Where am I?” The parasite asked. Uncaring that I had saved it even against my better judgment. Unknowing how close it was to never awakening to the world now covered in sunlight. That it was only by the grace of Princess Celestia’s Sun that I had not butchered it. Instead, it asked these pointless questions. Did it not remember how I had slain its attacker that nearly snuffed the parasite's own light?
“What is the last thing you remember?” I asked the parasite after running the cooling charm. Had she suffered brain damage? Did it still remember the process to become an Alicorn? Did it dare forget that Princess Celestia named it her own niece? The parasite before me attempted to lift both of its wings and bawled out a cry of pain. It remembered my name. What else did it remember?
The parasite now with tears clouding its eyes once more as its eyes traced the sloppy patchwork I had provided it. It cleared its eyes with its still usable wing. I could see as it allowed the fear, pain, and confusion to bleed from it. So that it could focus on the matter at hand. Preventing it from being caught in a spiral that would lead to its demise. It took the parasite a few tries to once more speak and even then it was a pale comparison to its usual mannerisms.
“Where are we?” It meekly asked. Its voice barely whispers. Where did the strength that so fueled it go? Where was its vaunted Love? Was it left without its warmth? “Sunset?” It whimpered as it tried to right itself only to fail.
“We are outside of Canterlot, about a half a day's journey by hoof. In-.” My words were silenced by the shade that had been kept at bay by my flames reformed. It was layered over the parasite. A mix of shadowed ink and pink coat and feathers. Why? What was this punishment? What was the purpose of this torment? Glaring at the shade I continued “-a bolt hole that I had prepared for when Princess Celestia finally got rid of me.”
The parasite frowned but otherwise remained silent as she digested my words. Yet, the shade that clung to her form did not. It opened its mouth in an attempt to speak its honeyed words. I did not give it the chance. Throwing forwards a spear of flames that ripped it from the Pony that it had originated from. Ignoring the cry of pain I tore and shredded the shade. Illuminating the cave as I birthed a new star to chase the darkness away.
It was gone for the moment. I had once more removed the parasite from the game. Now all I had to do was sever its wings. Stitch them to my own flesh and begin my ascension. Then I would properly greet Princess Celestia. Our reunion would be a pleasurable experience. My Sun blazed with the thoughts that swam through my blood. Perhaps the goddess of the Sun would enjoy experiencing the birth of another?
Mine would dwarf hers. Enveloping it. Embracing the warmth that was given to all. All except one. Once more embracing the love that had been denied. Swallowing the pitch that had formed in my mouth. I felt something plink off my shield. Refocusing on the realm that I still hoped was the one where ponies walked awake, I saw the parasite burn, her eyes frozen in fear.
This brings me back to our first meeting. Oh yes, I could remember the fear in her eyes. How she nearly crumbled before my might. I could remember the screams of the guards. The shouts of pain and torment. The blazing death that sought out the one that Celestia dared call her “Niece”.
The emptiness in Celestia’s eyes as she brought down the shield that separated the Ponies that she cared for and me. An impossible shield of brilliant light that saved the one that I had sought to reduce to soot. Then after she had ensured that her Ponies were safe did she turn to the demon that dared strike them in her presence. Was it any wonder I nearly killed myself at that moment?
Once more entrapped in the chill of a frozen prison. This one is of my own designs. The last sight I saw was Princess Celestia’s face contorted into a foul mockery of concern for the ponies she still cared for. It would have been better for every pony involved had she left me to expire. Instead, she brought me back, even after I had so nearly killed the one that she claimed as her own family.
I was after all a jumped-up orphan that managed to get saved by the Princess that cared for all of her ponies. Not the daughter of the only pony that ever cared for me. Taking in love that I had never deserved. That I had spat upon. That was no longer mine to take. There was no love spared to the one that would have struck Princess Celestia’s family.
There was no need for me anymore.
There was no need for me at all.
There was never a need for me.
My flames extinguished as my anger fell. Turning my attention back to the par-... Alicorn before me. Looking over the various burns that peppered her form. Fresh blisters and wounds seared into her being. How lucky. The one type of wound I could somewhat heal. “I can heal your burns,” I spoke, unsure myself if it was an offer or a command.
The Princess of Love however much she flinched back from my words did give a shallow nod. Giving her assent to be healed by the one that had spent the little time knowing her, plotting a fate worse than death for her. I stepped forwards, one hoof after another. Taking care not to inflict any more pain than necessary upon the pony that I had tormented. I began to work spells that I had once in my life been a constant companion to me. Now but distant memories.
It was a thick silence that neither one of us broke. The Alicorn of Love kept her breathing steady and attempted to not cry out at the pain. Refusing to show weakness to the one that harmed her once more. Was this what she was expecting out of the alliance? Was this another of my failures?
Finally, I had finished my work upon her flesh. Now all that was left was to allow her to heal the physical wounds. However much like the tears in her wing, I doubted it would be that easy for the scars that would no doubt remain. Turning my gaze from her form I instead looked at the now burned remnants of a place that could have hidden me from the Sun. Now but embers and ashes.
Finding that my satchel and sack didn't appear to be incinerated, I almost let out a relieved sigh. Perhaps my idiocy wouldn't be my complete downfall just yet. Pulling out from my sack a map and a compass, setting them on the ground behind me as I turned away from the wounded Alicorn. I began to restore what little could still be salvaged within the cave. Removing most of what could not and turning it into fine dust.
Making my way to the mouth of the cave I turned back to the Alicorn of Love. “You should be fine to walk. I would however recommend against using that wing again until it has had some more time to heal. I am going to go get food. If you stay within the cave nothing should be able to find you.” I informed the pink pony who was no longer actively staring at me instead focusing on one of the many new wounds that adorned her beautiful features. I took one more step before I spoke the words that had been freezing me from the inside. “I won't be back for an hour or so if you want to leave this would be the time. I promise I will not hunt you down in any way if you leave.” Promise spoken, I stepped out of the cave.
Readjusting my saddlebag to allow my sack too much more easily be held atop it. Even with telekinesis, some things didn't feel comfortable when you were holding them on your back. Brushing away a tear that dared spill from my eye, I began my hunt for any foodstuffs that I would need.
Finding a few berry bushes and even other plants that were edible was low and far between. I would have killed a few ponies to find a plot of wild hay. The hour passed in record time. Not even a shade phased into existence to further taunt me. There was no need. I could whisper those accursed words to myself. After all, there is no need for a tormenter when the guilty is willing to inflict such harm upon herself.
Taking a moment to reorientate myself. I began the long trek back to the cave. It would be an easy way out to teleport myself there. I would survive knowing that I would once more be alone. I would walk back into that cave to find that I was the only pony left. The Princess that had escaped the demon that had tortured her.
I know how this story went. But for the life of me, I could not squash the hope that dared flicker. That she would once more impossibly look past what I had done. That I was not going to be alone. That some pony actually stayed. I smiled at the Sun at the thought. “Has this all been worth it Princess?” Hearing no response from the celestial body I continued “You should have saved us both the heartache and left me to freeze.” I whispered to the ever-uncaring Sun that continued its journey dutifully across the heavens far above.
Pausing in my journey back towards the cave where I would once more find myself alone. Once more thanks to my own actions. I had once more ended up alone. Perhaps I truly was a demon. After all, ponies needed one another and yet here I was all alone. Should I just get ahead of the curve at this point? After all, eventually after experiencing the same tale over and over I should know how it ends.
Much like how in the stories of old the Princess was rescued after the foul demon was slain. Returned to her family's warm embrace and showered with Love. The kingdoms celebrated the return of the Princess, why wouldn't they, the Princess was adored far and wide by every pony. While the demon was once more cast into flames. Alone in the dark and cold once again. Left to wonder if it would ever crawl out of the ruined remnants of a burned-down home.
Standing in front of the entrance to the cave I froze. I could leave. Head anywhere. Princess Celestia wouldn't bother to find me and if she did it would be to execute me. The Princess that was no longer here, would come across a town or a traveling pony. Being rescued and brought back into Princess Celestia’s waiting wings. They would reunite and be happy that they were once more together. With no pony who dared separate them.
It would be so easy. All I had to do was not step inside. I wouldn't be disappointed by the fact that I had once more been left alone. I could still pretend that I was never abandoned by Celestia. I was never forsaken because I was never good enough for the goddess that was my only light.
Stepping forwards into the cave once more. With my namesake beating down upon my back. Urging me forward to step into the darkness and away from the light. The shadeless shadows beckoned me forth. The encroaching darkness demanded that I step forwards. With one final look to the final act of the Sun as it set upon the horizon. I entered a realm of darkness.
Skewing my gaze in a methodical fashion I checked every nook and cranny. Praying to the goddess that had abandoned me, in a futile fashion to ask her to let her chosen favorite be hidden where I had not yet checked. Once more forsaken I couldn't help the laughter that spilled out as I found the map and compass missing. With them, the Alicorn of Love.