We were all huddled into the planning room as Bently and Dr. M brought out their signature slide show presentation of the plan. “Alright gang, from what Kite has told us, we have to do this operation as quick as possible.” The turtle said, bringing up a slide.
"Rajan has sped up his plans to tonight and if we don't act fast, even if we win and defeat Rajan, the Prince and all his children will be lost." Uncle M said.
"Which is why we need to also need to split into groups to deal with everything." I said, helping shift a slide. "I'll deal with Rajan, as he might have gotten some special things added to him by Clockwork, as well as the fact I have a means of dealing with the hydrophobic bastard." I said, bringing out Arpeggio as an example.
"Do you think he would have been trained to not be hydrophobic?" Sly inquired to me.
"Good question…and no. Cause getting past phobia's is one thing…this is a primordial fear for him, even if it's stereotypical of cats to fear water, the stereotype exists for a reason."
"In Rajan's case I did find where the fear came from." Carmelita stated. "After some digging Bentley and I found out when Rajan was still young the village he and his family lived in was flooded. Only he survived because he climbed a tall tree but he watched his family and all the villagers drown below him."
"I mean, Fuck yeah that would cause hydrophobia among other issues." Nyla stated.
"I'd feel bad about using something that literally killed his parents…but fuck him he's being a deplorable prick." I frowned.
"As much against the idea I might be, maybe a Psychological attack would be the best approach." Dad voiced. "Kite, can you make realistic illusions?"
"I mean, I can make Illusions more real than reality itself." I answered. "Also…please don't question it…it's very weird to explain and even I barely understand how it works."
"And what about pulling memories from someone's mind?" Dad asked.
"Oh that's easy." I said honestly, pulling out my Lexicon.
"Then I think you know the plan." Dad stated.
"That's rather cruel of you, did Clockwerk rub off on you?" Nyla asked.
"Spent years around that psychotic owl. I won't lie, I probably know more how he thinks than any Cooper before me. Or after. No offense kids."
"I'm glad to know there are things I don't know about." I answered. "So it's alright dad."
"I guess it's at least an advantage in the long run." Sly said. "Well, in terms of how this is going down, I guess Kite is the only one that needs to do the heavy lifting. We'll just use the conflict between you and Rajan to sneak the hostages and his 'brides' out and to safety." Sly said.
"True, but I want to bring up a point." I said, bringing up a slide of the Contessa. "So, while I'm not sure if Clockwork got his talons around the spider lady, we need to be careful that we don't step into a trap."
"Why bring her up?" Murray inquired. "Something about your 'alternate history' knowledge?"
"Correct." I nodded. "Normally, the Contessa and Neyla would capture you and Sly for obvious reasons, and Carmelita for being a supposed 'traitor', helping the Cooper gang do crimes, and a whole thing with prison time and hypnosis with Clockworks Eyes helping her do better with that cause she was a part of the Klaww Gang." I explained. "She also…apparently has a lot of knowledge on tech and dark magic…somehow." I shook my head. "So I'm just going to say, be careful, I don't know what outliers are here and I don't want to take chances…or lose any of you."
"Putting aside that why would I work with the warden of Moon Cell?" Nyla asked, making us all look at her. "What? She's clearly an off worlder."
"Excuse me what?" I frowned. "Alright so…do you want the answer to why you were working with them in the alternate timeline or…do you just want to answer how the hell she's an Off Worlder?" I asked, cause even in the games the Contessa was said to be from this world.
"Well for starters name one other person on this world that is essentially a Spider-Tar or any other form of centaur?" I thought about it… and shit… she's right. "Second her species from what I know are all wardens on a world called Moon Cell. Basically a prison planet that holds galactic criminals. They use dark magic and hypnosis to keep their less than friendly inmates more or less comatose and docile until they expire naturally."
"Oh boy, that makes this a lot more complicated." I frowned. "So originally, she was just a normal spider lady that used her hypnosis to 'rehabilitate' the inmates, but as a front for her getting the criminals to tell her where all their loot was and profit from it " I explained. "But…if Clockwork managed to…her husband…" I muttered in realization and horror.
Bentley began typing rapidly on his PC. "According to this she isn't married yet. The two are currently dating but not engaged." He reported.
Good. He's still alive then.
"Alright…so at least at this point, The Contessa would be married and, through mysterious means, he husband died pretty much after the wedding and gave her tons of money to do a lot of shady things with her hypnosis." I explained. "And yes, it was never explained." I added.
"Must have been a rowdy honeymoon." Dad chuckled, earning a mild smack from mom.
"None of you are ready for what I have to say on that subject." I said vaguely. "But…hopefully this means the Contessa isn't working for Clockwork…" I said. "But uh…question, how old is the boyfriend?"
"According to this her boyfriend is in his early seventies. No actual age given for the Contessa though." Bentley informed.
"Makes sense. Her species is long lived. Average lifespan is a little over two hundred." Nyla added as she looked over at Bentley's PC. "Judging from that photo of her she's probably about a hundred and… thirty or so."
"Alright…" I said. "Well, best to still remain vigilant and cautious. We don't know what that damned owl has in store for us besides Rajans bullshit, and I'd rather not get caught off guard too hard."
"Once Rajan is dealt with we can check in with Contessa and the other people of interest you have in mind." Dad said.
"Yeah, cause I don’t know what’s changed with Dimitri and Jean since we got here and have been doing this…and Arpeggio is going to be a bitch and a half I just know it.”
I wasted no time once the operation began and kicked in the doors leading to the chamber Rajan was in. He snarled as he looked at me. “You must be Kite Cooper.” Rajan said.
“And you must be overcompensating.” I teased with a cheeky grin.
"Ah yes. The quick wit, sarcastic humor. Vincent told me about you. In great detail."
Okay… that caught me off.
“Cause of course he did…” I grumbled. “Alright, so you know how this is going to end, yes?”
"I know better than to fight you. Yes. I also know you won't let me leave here free or alive."
“Alright, you’re going the right direction of this being the easy way.” I answered carefully. “Cause I’d rather not fight, and…at a certain point wonder why you thought this…” I motioned to everything. “Was at all a good idea?”
"I figure, if I was to leave an impact on this world it would be one remembered for generations. For better or worse, my name won't be forgotten."
"I mean…there's better ways to have your name never be forgotten than literally everything you've been doing." I said bluntly.
"Maybe. But I am not a good man. Never claimed to be, and never tried. I know who and what I am Kite Cooper, and I am at peace with it."
I sighed. "So…how do you want to do this?"
"Do I really get a choice?"
"All depends on if this is a trap or not." I answered simply. "Cause the age old adage 'easy way or the hard way' is still up in the air technically with Clockwork and Vincent involved."
"True. Never before have I met someone with as twisted an imagination or endless bounds of cruelty as him. When you make an enemy, you know how to pick them."
“I’m assuming your talking about Vincent…and well, that’s what happens when you’re a bastard that somehow remember’s every reset.” I frowned. “And I’m here to make sure that the world doesn’t end because of his spite.”
"Then pray tell, why are you here? Why are you not going after him rather than standing here, speaking to me?"
“Because I technically am at the moment, and because this is part of his ‘entertainment’.” I answered. “Cause shit’s happening that he’s never seen before…and he’s enjoying it.” I said, seeing Rajan’s eyes widen a tad at that. “Something new, after countless times he’s seen this happen before…plus, you’ve probably heard of how I was personally punted half way across the planet by the bastard himself.”
"I remember hearing of something like that. I see. It makes sense, to be fair. Someone like him, his goals require little effort, and it seems between the end and now, he simply fills his time."
“And considering what he’s willingly given me, an entire cascade of his own knowledge…” I sighed. “There’s no reason why he couldn’t have just nuked reality as a whole…but ya know, I’m not here to just roll over and die, I’m not here to let other’s suffer because some asshole think’s it’s funny, I’m here to make a difference damn it.” I frowned. “I’m here to help people, to stop those that would abuse their powers just for shit’s and giggles, and give those that fell down a dark path a second chance if able.”
“I suppose. As far as idealistic goals go, it’s better than drowning yourself in meaningless tasks or endless sex.”
…
“Don’t answer that.” I immediately thought to myself, showing him no emotion at that barb. “So…mind if I ask who else you're working with?” I inquired, carefully walking towards Rajan with a pair of handcuffs for his size cause he’s gonna have to come with me for his crimes.
“That is for Vincent and Clockwerk to decide.” He shrugged as he looked down at me as I was now right in front of him. I reached to grab his hand… only to have it phase through… “Like I said, I would be a fool to fight you.”
“Shit…” I muttered. “Anybody there?” I asked quickly through my communicator for everyone else.
”Kite, the kids are all here but the prince and his wives aren’t.” Uncle M informed.
I took a deep breath, and exhaled…I took another deep breath an exhaled as I used my brand new Cript Senses to find where the fuck Rajan and everyone else is.
First I scanned India… Then The planet… then the solar system. I frowned as I looked back up at Rajan.
“Looking for someone?” His… projection, asked me.
I rubbed my temples. “Cause nothing can ever go right can it?” I asked, looking at his projection and seeing if it was just a hologram, or if I could use my powers to literally pull this motherfucker by the throat back to this reality.
“Don’t worry, I won’t be harming the Prince or his wives. I have no need to. Vincent made me an offer I figured would be better in the long run, and so, you will find them on a small planet rather far from here. Unharmed and in good health. I am, however, keeping my brides.”
I rubbed my temples. “And what was this god damn offer?” I asked.
“Why be a king when I can be a being above gods.” He answered. “One day, we will have the fight you were expecting Kite Cooper, but whether you are in this skin or in your true form, you might find Clockwerk, myself and whoever else joins in this little game Vincent is playing… will be a fair fight.”
“You’re adorable.” I answered nonchalantly, honestly getting real sick and tired of this bullshit but knowing it’s only here to annoy the piss out of me and make that rat bastard laugh. “But whatever…only making thing’s worse…so what planet is the prince at?” I asked carefully.
“Don’t know the name. All I know is that it has… such lovely gardens.” Rajan said with a calming sigh. The projection vanished rapidly.
Gardens… Radiant Garden. Only planet I know that is like that.
“I got a lead where the prince and his wives are.” I said over the communicator. “And also, Rajan fucked off with his wives and…is now like Clockwerk…”
”Makes sense. Rajan has done a lot of harm and bad but Clockwerk must have admired his skills and strength.” Dad said over the comms.
It was a quick trip bringing the prince and his wives back from Radiant Garden.
The hard part was cleaning up the leftovers of Rajan’s gangs and such. India would take a long time to recover but with actual cops back in action here it would at least be a start.
With that all done I dragged Nyla along to speak with Arpeggio. “I still say this is a bad idea.” Nyla said as we landed outside Arpreggio’s lab.
“I am a bad idea but you don’t see me whining about it.” I rolled my eyes. “But I need you here to help me figure out if Arpeggio is working with Clockwerk or not…”
“Why? Aren’t you mr. all seeing god whatever?”
“Funnily enough, I tried that.” I said honestly, which caught Neyla off guard. “And my advice? Don’t.” I shook my head. “I’m not ‘all seeing’, just because I’m an Admin that…has been given the information about Reality itself Twice now, there’s thing’s even I don’t know. Just because I’m the smartest person in the room eight times out of ten doesn’t mean I know everything.”
“I still don’t want to go.” She frowned as I snuck up to a window. Well, there he is. Looks like he’s working on… that mobile bird cage thing.
“Was your falling out that bad?” I asked with a frown.
“He can’t have a Keyblade. He’ll just get himself killed or… worse.” Nyla frowned.
“Listen, he already thought using Clockwerk’s corpse as a hate fueled flight suit was a great idea in the alternate timeline, and besides…we’re not here to ask for a Keyblade…also, if Clockwerk got to him, why the fuck would he ask us for one?” I pointed out.
“Cause he wants to fly. On his own power.” Nyla said. “Or as close to it as he can get.”
“My point.” I said. “So do you want to see if he sold his soul to a very vindictive Tootsie Pop Owl or not?”
"You can go in if you want. I'm staying here." Nyla said, dropping to the floor and sitting cross legged in the grass.
I rolled my eyes. “Fine.” I shook my head, not wanting to deal with her being a child right now as I continued to meet the really smart bird.
I walked around to the front of the lab and knocked. After several minutes and a few swears from inside the door opened. Arpeggio standing next to a button on the wall nearby. "Who are you?" He asked me.
“Kite Cooper.” I answered. “May I come in? I have a few questions I’d like to ask concerning both…a friend of mine, and other important things.”
"Umm… okay?" He said as I entered. "Don't know what a Cooper wants to talk to me about. Majority of my machines are either in beta or theoretical only so far."
“Well…this visit is important, for a few reasons.” I answered. “One of them being…have you ever been visited by any people of interest?” I asked. “And not me for obvious reasons.”
"Hmm… well, some years ago Raleigh contacted me asking if I was interested in working on some weather machine but I turned it down. Not my area of expertise or interest. After that… no. A few business types asking if I'd make this or that in exchange for funding but I haven't taken any offers yet."
“So you weren’t contacted by Releigh’s boss?” I inquired.
"No, just him. Offered good pay but again, not my field of expertise and he was arrested a bit ago so I dodged a bullet with that one." He shrugged. "Most of the people who contact me now ask about cars or machines for factory manufacturing."
“Fair enough…also yes, you would have not wanted to be a part of my Mom’s Ire.” I said sheepishly. “So…next question…what is your relationship with Neyla?”
"Hm. Former associate. We… had a disagreement some years back. I haven't seen her since. Is she… in trouble?"
“No, thankfully.” I sighed. “But I want to know your side, cause I was told Neyla’s side…and I’d like to know what your side is.” I said honestly.
Arpeggio eyed me skeptically, and seemed to be choosing his words carefully before speaking. "I met Nyla many years ago. She was… homeless. Moving from place to place and digging through trash for meals. Caught her trying to mess with some of my trash. I offered her a meal the location of some shelters. She tried to refuse but her stomach betrayed her." He said with a chuckle.
"In the end she stayed around here for a while. In exchange for helping me in the lab I gave her a place to stay. Taught her, she was surprisingly illiterate and lacked basic math skills. We became like friends though I suspect she saw me more like a parental figure. Never told me what happened to her parents, just that they died when she was young. One day I saw her use an… artifact. Old and magic in nature. Normally I wouldn't bother with magic, but her artifact held… power. And I saw in it a means to achieve a life long dream of mine.
"She refused to let me examine it and I, well, lost composure. Words were said and… to my regret, slurs were part of it and… well, she left and I haven't seen her since. All I have left of her are a few photos we took." He motioned to a wall where a few pictures of him and Neyla were taped on it.
“Why do you think she didn’t want you to have this artifact? Or to study it at least?” I inquired, knowing exactly why but wanting to know from his perspective.
"She always told me she couldn't stay anywhere long because she attracted trouble. At first I thought she was just superstitious but… well, after I saw her with the artifact and the… trouble she spoke of I guessed, when I cooled down, that she didn't want me to attract that trouble either." He said with a sigh. "She honestly deserves better. A chance at a normal life, to have a place she can rest her head without being a magnet for this trouble. I of all people know how life's unfairness can make something so simple so out of reach." He said, fluttering his small wings as he said that before folding them back at his sides.
I sighed. “Trust me…I know that feeling more than anyone.”
"I suppose I'm not surprised she doesn't want to see me again. I just hope one day she can get the simple, peaceful life she wants."
“Well, I’m doing my best to give people that future.” I said honestly. “But it’s…tough to be honest…I tried to bring Neyla here but…well, you probably know better as to when she doesn’t want to do a thing.”
"Heh. True." He nodded. "I suppose if anything, I hope she finds some happiness. Was there anything else you came here for?"
"Well…" I hummed. "We could use your technical expertise to help us deal with other bad guys…and in exchange…" I decided to give Arpeggio a once over, to see if he wasn't also a hologram or a double agent.
My scan turned up nothing. This was him. His body is almost criminally weak. Even for a bird his size.
"I appreciate the offer but I respectfully decline." He said simply. "My work focuses on restoring lost functions to the body or returning functions that didn't developed properly. I'm not interested in developing gadgets and utilities, just returning or giving what was lost or never there to those that need it."
"Well I can easily help with that." I answered readily. "And if you need an example, I'm willing to demonstrate my knowledge."
"And in exchange as my boss you can get me and Neyla in the same room for a talk?" He asked with a chuckle. "If that is your intent then I'm afraid my decline still stands."
"Oh no." I shook my head, getting Arpeggio to give me a look. "At this point, I just want to help someone that wants to be better, and I also want to be the one to help you so your desperation doesn't…make you follow bad individuals." I said carefully.
He seemed to mull that over for a bit. "I suppose the funding would be nice. Getting a bit old doing commissions for factories, car nuts and such."
“Plus you can focus on the world of prosthetics.” I said simply. “Cause that can help people a lot more than simple cars and factories.”
"Alright. I suppose at least it opens up better possibilities." He nodded.
“Yep.” I nodded. “So, mind showing me some of your works?”
"Well, at the moment most of my projects are on paper. Save this." He motioned to the half built bird cage mobile. "This will help me move around and at least remain at eye level with people in my daily life. I have plans for modifications later on but if it makes travel for me easier then I know others will definitely utilize it for the same reason."
“Having a motorized segway is always a good thing.” I chuckled, looking over the thing and seeing that it was pretty much the same as the game version, just half built. “So, got any questions as to what I know about Prosthetics?”
"Well, what do you know of Prosthetics?"
“To the point where I can make it look, act, and feel like the real flesh and blood thing.” I answered readily.
"If that is true, then why hire me?"
“Because of many reasons.” I answered. “One is to help you, because I am a genuinely good person, two because I want to share my knowledge of it with you, and three, because one person can’t do everything.” I answered. “Believe me…I have tried doing everything by myself and…it doesn’t work.”
"Well, I suppose. What will I be doing aside my usual work?"
“Well, what else do you want to do?” I inquired. “Cause with my help I’m giving you the chance to fly.”
"I don't really have any other goals in mind. Being able to fly and help fix others has been my main goal since I began inventing."
“A noble goal that I want to help foster and grow.” I said with a smile. “For knowledge is meant to help the people, not meant for personal gain.”
I spent a few hours talking with Arpeggio and making arrangements. When I finished, Neyla was gone. Sighing, I went home and took a nap.
The next morning I woke up feeling a bit stiff. With a stretch and some pops that went away and I began to wonder what to do today. Still need to check in on Dimitri. Contessa… and John Bison.
“Alright…so Dimitri was still doing that ‘flash bang’ art that we…accidentally caused back during Mugshot’s whole thing…” I muttered, thinking about who to find first. “At least, I hope he’s still trying to do something with art, better than crime…”
I checked and he is still a well respected artist. No ties to criminal activity, but he does own the same night club as before. Only this time it seems to be legit.
All the data on the Contessa is still there. Same as what Bentley said.
John Bison is still being thawed out it seems… hm… I could probably move him to a world ripe with trees and in need of a good lumberjack. Probably what's best for him in the long run.
And if I can't find one I can make one-
Wait… make one…
I mean… I know I can make planets but their Affinity… I'd have to talk with Heart about it but I might be able to kill two birds with one stone.
“Alright…” I muttered. “This is going to take…a lot of time and effort…plus I was gonna have to train my family to be a whole lot stronger for the upcoming problems…”
First… best see about calling Heart. The whole Light and Dark thing is their domain after all and if anyone can make this work it's them.
“Alright…time to call Heart…” I said, hoping thing’s won’t escalate from there and…well I don’t think Heart has seen me as Kite.
I sent the message and It wasn't long til the DTL appeared and my Floof Noodle partner and mate slithered into my room… it was almost too small.
"Hey King." Heart said with a small wave. They were mostly coiled up and I sat atop their coiled half. "So, Sly Cooper world?"
“Yep.” I said. “And I’m Kite Cooper…also sorry for this area being too small for ya.”
"It's alright. Kinda forget we're usually huge." They shrugged. "So, what's the reason you called me here?"
“Cause I need your help with…creating a world here.” I said carefully. “And Light and Darkness is in your area so…”
Heart looked around the room. "Looks like a world to me." They said.
I huffed. “Listen…there’s already more problems with Rajan also becoming an Admin and…I need to do a lot of shit real quick, one such thing is probably getting John Bison a new world to Lumberjack to his heart’s content if he’s still mad at nature and Neyla a world her Lanesborn issue won't call Heartless on.”
"Hmm. Well, Lanesborn can only safely live on a planet that is wholly in the Light. In order for a world like that to exist another has to exist where all the darkness exists and the two would basically co-exist as equilibriums to one another."
“Ah, that makes sense.” I nodded. “First time I’m trying to make a planet in the Lanes so…really need to know all my stuff before doing something stupid ya know?”
"I imagine you want it close to this world to have tabs kept on it and such?"
“Of course.” I nodded. “Don’t want to just plop down a planet somewhere random and then leave them to do who knows what.”
"Fair. But it's counterpart will have to be near too. Hmm. I can probably set something up to ensure whatever develops on the counterpart planet can't escape so at least there's that. Making a portal from there and here will be easy. Now, I just have one question for you."
“Go ahead.” I nodded. “What do you have to ask?”
"Mind if Eclipsa and I join in here?" They asked. "I think it would be fun. We'll even take new forms to fit in better."
“I mean, that would be cool.” I nodded. “Family would probably flip at having you and Eclipsa probably dog pile onto me….”
"Hence why we will change forms to better fit in." Heart said. "Probably should also do different names. Better fit the mood and slip into the story." True. With Balance, Grey Hearts, and Secret Reports all marked completed their main screen time will be here on LoN. "Wonder what I should pick?"
“Well, we should probably bring Eclipsa here as well…also I have two girlfriend’s so far, Matilda and Jing King…Matilda is basically Rouge the Bat and…Jing King is an adorably thicc panda.”
"Cute. Also she is here." Heart said, patting their coiled body. Huh. I thought it looked… larger than normal. I thought it was just the size difference though.
“Ah, that’s why.” I nodded. “Good to know, alright…so we’re in a world of Beastial’s…so pick your favorite race?”
"Hmm… that's actually a tough one…" Heart hummed as they thought. "Hmmm… already snake and canine so not gonna do those two…hmmm… oh! I got it!" Heart said, snapping their fingers. In a poof of light I fell to my butt and looking up I spotted Heart's new form. They were a bear. Fluffy and curvy with very light brown fur but the same red eyes they've always had. Despite being a bit taller than me I figured physical age wise we were still the same. They were dressed in a simple blue sports bra and short shorts. "Like it?" They asked, twirling to let me see front and back… nice.
“Perfect.” I said with a warm smile, hugging the now bountiful bear that was Heart.
"Heh. Okay, Eclipsa. It's your turn." Heart said.
In another flash Eclipsa popped out. Only instead of the pony-naga I knew she looked like an orange cat. Stripes of white along her back, arms and tail with two white ear tips. She was also short. Like, surprisingly short but well built and curved. A Short Stack, if you will.
"Ta-da." She declared, dressed in a tight fitting shirt and also wearing short shorts.
“Awesome.” I said, giving Eclipsa a hug as well. “Now…names.”
"Hm… dibs on Megan." Heart, now Megan, said.
"I'm feeling Sasha. Short stack Sasha." Eclipsa, now Sasha, said with a smirk.
"Why are you a short stack anyway?"
"Thought I'd give it a try." They shrugged.
“And I’m super happy.” I said happily. “Boy…is everyone going to flip when they meet you two…”
"So, mind giving us a recap on what's happened so far? Judging from how this place looks I'm guessing it went off the rails fast?" Megan asked.
“So…” I sighed. “First…Clockwerk and the gang took over the world because Clockwerk was using Cooper Bot’s to help his bullshit…yes, literal cybernetic undead of all my ancestors to help…” I sighed. “Then, after a bit of nonsense…me, Sly, the gang, Carmelita, Dr. M and McSweeny all moved to Cane Island…”
The next few hours were spent recapping the last few years, my rebuilding relationship with Sly, that Time Walker asshole, and this deal with Vincent, and all that…
"That's fucked up." Sasha said.
“You have no idea.” I sighed. “Oh, I also have a bunch of kids…both from me somehow adding my DNA to Clockwerk’s kids and…all those adorable racoon owl hybrids…and then the Good Boy Predator.”
"Kinky." Megan chuckled. "So, where is Neyla anyway?"
“No idea.” I shook my head. “After I finished talking to Arpeggio she kinda fucked off.”
"Hm. Rude. Well, Sasha and I can get started on making the safe planet for her and others. You go let your parents know two of your wives are in the house." Megan said, smirking as she and Sasha vanished.
Oh boy… wonder how Matilda and Jing will react? Sly… yeah…
“Ugh…” I groaned, rubbing my temples bitterly as I walked out. “Why do I keep doing this to myself?”
My first trip was to Sly's room. I entered and began overhearing Sly talk to… Carmelita?
"Are you positive you wanna do that?" She asked.
"If I'm honest… yeah." Sly said. "Been thinking it over for a while and Honestly I think it's best."
“Stab me in the heart, why don’t ya?” I thought to myself, not sure if I should ask what’s going on or wait till their done with their conversation.
"Think Kite will overreacted?" Carmelita asked.
"He has a tendency to blame himself but this isn't about all that. I've been considering this long before he told and showed us his god… powers, stuff." Sly replied. "I'm gonna let him inherit the cane and family legacy."
"And… be a cop?"
"Well, Matilda and mom said if I want there is room for me. I know you're joining it too."
"Still. I just hope Kite won't feel guilty. Those games were called Sly Cooper after all."
Sly laughed. "Those are just that, games. This is Kite's story. Not mine. As wild and crazy as it is."
"I mean, I knew from the start when we played 'Cops and Robbers'." I said, poking my head around. "Sly always wanted to be a cop, and you were the robber Carmelita…almost feels like an eternity talking about that…"
"How long have you been there?" Sly asked with a smirk.
"At the 'are you positive?' bit." I said. "Which I could have taken…many different ways, and if you wanted me to overreact, you could have had it be a marriage proposal." I chuckled.
"Not anytime soon my not so little brother." Sly chuckled. "But, yeah. I'm gonna be joining the mainstream policing units so I'll be doing cleanups of whatever bad guy you take down leaves behind."
"Which I'm fine with." I nodded.
"But, that does mean I won't be around here a lot." Sly pointed out. "World's getting better but it's not peaceful yet. I'll be away for a good while."
"You, me, Mrs. Cooper and Matilda." Carmelita added. "They need as many people on the streets as possible."
"We need good people on both sides to get things do." I nodded. "Talk to the others about this?"
"Yeah. Everyone else knows already. Gonna suck not seeing you all for a while but eventually we'll try and call when or if we can." Sly said.
"Alright." I nodded. "I trust you both…now there's just a thing where…two of my spouses are here…" I said sheepishly.
"Spouses? As in from… the other life?" Carmelita asked.
"Yes…" I said nervously. "They're friendly, they won't do anything…to crazy, and they'll abide by the rules I'm doing…kinda." I explained carefully.
"Okay… where are they?" Sly asked.
"They are…either busy or waiting for me to introduce them to all of you." I said carefully.
"Oh. So, we'll see them later then." Sly said with a nod. "By the way, have you seen Neyla?"
“Nope, after I talked to Arpeggio she just…kinda fucked off.” I shook my head.
"Oh. Well according to Bentley she didn't come back last night."
"Do you think she went off world?" Carmelita asked.
“Hmm…maybe.” I said, using my new Cript senses to see where the hell she was. “This feels like cheating…” I mentally joked.
I had to scan far. Further than I expected and I finally found her… the hell is she doing at the Keyblade Graveyard?! And fighting waves of Heartless?!?!
Huh… so that's what her Keyblade looks like.
“Alright…I’ll be right back, cause Neyla is fighting a whole lotta enemies.” I said.
I rapidly opened a DTN and ran through.
The Keyblade Graveyard was just as… usual as ever. Depressing. Bleak.
In the distance I spotted Neyla fending off the endless swarms of Heartless. Shit this is what shows up when she summons her Keyblade? No wonder she doesn't use it much… but why does she have it out now?
As she fought I managed to get a look at her weapon. It looked as if made from a mix of a tree and metal, the branches and vines wrapping and climbing up from one another to the top that seemed to hold the image of a moon with a silhouette of a wolf howling.
Despite the numbers she was… actually, she's holding her own… and, pretty well…
“Doing pretty good.” I said, walking around the Heartless as it seemed like they were all giving me an extremely wide birth to walk towards Neyla.
"What are you doing here?" She asked, seeing the distance the heartless put between myself and them. Eventually she and I were in the fair sized safe bubble my presence made.
“Wondering why your here, and wondering why there’s a metric ass ton of Heartless after you.” I started
"It's what happens when I summon my Keyblade. Me just being on a world draws them over time. Slowly but more over time and when I summon my Keyblade I get this." She waved to the sea of Heartless around us. "This world is empty. I come here to vent. Train… wield it…" She said, lazily swinging her blade around. "Only me and the heartless. No one else is at risk…"
“Mind if I see the Keyblade?” I inquired softly. “Maybe me and my spouse can figure out why this is happening cause…this doesn’t happen.” I answered, which made Neyla give me a strange look like I was crazy.
"I told you why it happens remember? Lanesborn. Two parents from two different worlds. Even without a Keyblade I'd attract the bastards."
I frowned, before looking into Neyla’s Code cause something about that still doesn’t make much sense to me. “Well, I’d still like to see your Keyblade cause it’s a brand new one I’ve never seen before.”
"How about no?" She countered.
I frowned. Her code was pretty straightforward. Basic hybrid stuff and… what's this? Right… there. Mixed in with her code lines for Homeworld location… that's… a mess… right. Two parents, two different worlds. It seems to cause a bug that her heart code seems to trigger. When a Keyblade is summoned it creates basically a beacon effect, letting any creature that can detect a heart's frequency, aka Heartless, that they're here.
“Alright, so I think I figured out the problem.” I answered. “And yes, it actually does involve your Keyblade.” I said, starting to send a message to Heart given this was also their Territory.
"No shit Sherlock." She huffed.
“So, there seems to be a small…problem with your Heart.” I said carefully. “Somehow when you were born, something bugged and, whenever you bring out your keyblade, you act like a beacon for literally anything that detects a heart’s frequency…funnily enough, for the most part it has nothing to do with the fact you're a hybrid.”
"Points for obvious…" She frowned, sitting down on the dirt and sighing.
“And don’t worry, I know how to fix it.” I answered.
"Doubtful."
“We just need to wait for my spouse to get here real quick and then we move onto fixing it.” I stated simply.
"Are they an Eldritch being from beyond nightmares?"
Well… only if you ate the last bag of Skittles…
“Well, you better not eat their ButterFinger that’s for sure.” I chuckled.
"Should I… know what a Butterfinger is? Sounds like a quick way to clogged arteries."
I blinked at her…then literally pulled out the candy bar in question. “Try it.”
She took it, looking it over before shrugging and opening it and taking a bite. She then spat it out. "Egh. Peanuts. Gross."
“Allergic or just don’t like Peanut Butter?” I asked curiously.
"Don't like it. Had nothing but the stuff to eat for a month and I'm still pretty sick of it." She said, tossing the rest of the candy bar into the swam of heartless.
“Yeah that’s fair.” I nodded. “But yeah, Heart should be getting here soon, then a lot of things will be solved for you.”
"Not optimistic." She shrugged, disbanding her Keyblade.
“I’m sure it’ll change at least a bit.” I said simply.
"Not getting my hopes up."
“Alright, is there more reasons as to why your this pessimistic?” I inquired.
"Hmm. I dunno. Saw my parents killed by Heartless before my very eyes. Was told from a very young age I could never have a home, family or nice things in general cause of my magnetism to Heartless. One time dared to dream I found a nice place I could blend in and call home. Accidentally summoned my Keyblade and sent that world to the realm of Darkness. Have been kidnapped. Enslaved. Raped. Tortured and beaten multiple times over my life. Oh yeah and my feral form which I can not control myself or even remember and have on many occasions woken up after said change covered in blood and it was rarely ever mine and I had bone fragments and chunks of meat in my teeth among other things such as finding scraps of clothes or jewelry in my shit the next day. So… yeah I think I'm entitled to my pessimistic views."
“Yeah, that sounds about right.” I nodded. “Sounds like you need therapy, a friend, and a hug.”
"Therapy is for people who have a reason to care. My few friends are either getting on in years or have lives. And I don't like being touched."
“Therapy is for everyone, and I should know, I never thought Therapy would help and it has been helping.” I answered simply. “Doesn’t matter about age or ‘have lives’, you have friends you can rely on…and yes, you do need a hug.”
"This coming from the same guy who was bitching 'woah is me, my family knows I'm not a normal racoon and I'm a god playing make believe and will hate me'."
Okay what's taking Heart so long cause I'm getting a bit close to knocking her the Fuck out…
“Because I learned that family and trust actually means something.” I frowned. “I learned that life is actually great when your not seeing everything through the lens of pessimism to the point you pretty much kill your own Heart because you don’t care.” I stated.
"If it means I croak then so be it." She shrugged. "My life has no value to me."
“And I thought that exact same thing.” I answered. “But when I found people that cared about me, that could help me through all this bullshit, I got better, and the same thing can happen to you.”
"And how long did that take you?"
I had to think about that. “I…don’t actually know.” I said. “Time has been weird for me…like, technically, due to a lot of time dilation shenanigans…I’m probably a few million years old? Maybe? I haven’t kept track, and boy fucking howdy was a lot of it filled with me just wanting to Spite someone.”
She laughed at that. "No offense but I'd rather not see if I can even live that long."
“And I had to because I have people that believe my life means something.” I answered. “Even if I stayed alive to make sure they were happy, they wanted me to know my life is important, that I shouldn’t just spend my days pissed at myself so hard that I try to push everyone and everything away from me.” I shook my head.
"Well lucky you." She huffed.
"And I'm here, trying to help you." I told the tiger hybrid. "Not for any personal gain, not for some bullshit reason you think I would have, I want to help you cause I want to help."
"What reason do I even have to live? Arpeggio? He's better off without me. Matilda? She's got herself a Cooper and seems fine as can be. You? Ha!"
“When I talked to Arpeggio, he said that you deserve better.” I said honestly. “Cause he still cares about you. Matilda? I mean, she’s dating me, but she’s fine even without that…and wait, are we magically talking about dating?” I asked. “Also rude, I’m here actually trying to help you and do a good thing but you keep acting like me before I finally realized all life doesn’t suck total ass.” I growled.
“Like you have anything to say mister ‘this is all fun and ga-’.” She was cut off as I picked her up by the throat.
“My life, before all this horseshit, has been a complete lie twice over.” I told her bluntly. “Everything about me has been one fabrication after another for those that think it’s fucking funny to watch as a child get murdered, lose his soul, having to use his own light to keep himself alive, and then murdering their parents and staging them as suicides to blame myself ttime, and time again.” I growled. “I have suffered tortures you couldn’t even fathom, I crossed the threshold of Madness, but you want to know why I’m still here? Do you want to know why I’m still going? Even though I gave up my own Death?” I asked, seeing the hybrid look at me with wide eyes at me explaining this. “It’s because I have people that I don’t deserve, people that deserve better, people that genuinely love me.” I explained, dropping the tiger dire wolf hybrid. “I have people with me that care, I…mostly let go of my own self deprecating hatred and finally felt better about myself, because I had people to help me! You have people here to help you to damn it!”
"And what exactly do you expect me to do after?! Forget all the shit that was my life?! You sure as shit haven't if you're throwing it in my face! How do you expect me to be happy when I can remember?!"
“It’s called fucking trying!” I snapped. “Being there with the people that care about you, making an actual god damn attempt to be better! Yes, it’s hard, I don’t expect you to get it today, or tomorrow, but what I expect you to do is at least try!” I told them bluntly. “That’s literally all I’ve been trying to get you to do, is to at least try to be better, bring you to my family to at least form some relationship, friendly or otherwise, so you can see that life actually does matter, that it’s more than just self depreciation…and currently, if Heart could get here faster, we can take the first step to fixing this cause you being born, you being a hybrid of two different worlds, never was the problem.” I answered.
"Sorry that took so long I was putting some finishing touches on the world." Heart- er, Megan, said as they exited a DTL. "Woah. What's all this?" They motioned to Neyla, the heartless still around and me.
“They’re Code is bugged, that whenever they bring out their keyblade they become a beacon for Heart Detectors.” I answered. “As well as almost as self deprecating as me, so we had an argument about her actually trying to be better.”
"Huh… feels weird being on the other end of that argument doesn't it?" Megan chuckled.
"So… this is the person you said might be able to fix me?" Neyla asked.
“Yep.” I nodded. “My spouse, who’s going by Megan right now, is going to help me fix your heart considering…well the Heart is her domain.” I said carefully. “Like…their Kingdom Hearts level of domain.”
Nodding, Megan walked up to Neyla. She raised a hand that glowed with that all familiar blue light. "Let's see. Ah. Lanesborn glitch. Oddly common. Hang on, the old Admin left me something for just such an issue…" Megan snapped her fingers, a brief flash of code and when I scanned Neyla, the issue was gone. But, rather than a Homeworld slot, now was an Ancestor list. Both her mother and father's worlds are listed. "Done."
“Fantastic.” I said with a smile. “And now, things should be getting better.”
"I don't feel any different." Neyla said.
"You wouldn't feel a difference but you will see it. Also, begone with you!" Megan said, all the Heartless vanishing at their command.
“Yeah, it’s one of those changes that you can notice around you rather than in you.” I shrugged. “Like a calming silence after a douchebag roommate moves out finally.”
After that I sent Neyla to her new home place, rapidly abducted John Bison and basically hired him to work cutting all the trees. I also had the various Cripts, their mates and my good boy move into the world and here they were able to have homes.
Mom and Dad liked Megan and Sasha. Matilda really liked them and was sad she wouldn't be around much.
Sly, Carmelita, Mom and Matilda all went off to be cops and while I was upset, I knew they were at least happy. And called regularly.
I took a week off enjoying Megan and Sasha's company. Jing also joined in and… well that's been enjoyable.
Eventually I got back to work and was checking in on the Contessa. I've been scoping out her and her boyfriend. They seem… genuinely happy together.
“Well…glad to know that this was a genuine and loving relationship…” I muttered to myself, gently walking up to the front door and knocking on it cause I did have some questions for them.
After a bit the multi-legged walking taps of the Contessa stopped and she opened the door. "Yes- Oh, Kite Cooper! What an honor!" She said with a bow.
“Please, no need to bow.” I said with a raised hand. “Mind if I come in? I would like to ask some questions about…current events as it were.” I said carefully.
"Oh, of course." She said, stepping aside as I entered. This was her boyfriend's mansion, and there, sitting in a large chair by the fireplace was her love. Phillips L Northwood. His family is old money, but he specializes in, funny enough, plant cultivation and GMOs. "Sweetie. We have a guest."
The older man looked up and over at me. "Kite Cooper. Come. I had hoped to speak with you." He motioned to a seat across from him.
I took the seat and Contessa sat next to her love on a fluffy floor mat. Well, she is too big for a sofa…
“So, it’s nice to meet the both of you.” I nodded with a smile. “And I’m happy to see you two are in a loving relationship.”
"Of course." Phillips said with a chuckle. "You wouldn't guess by looking at us, but she's older than I am."
"Oh hush you." Contessa chuckled.
I chuckled at that. “So, before I start saying I agree with your taste in mature women, I have some questions I’d like to ask, and to answer any questions you might have.”
"I suppose. I am an open book. Ask away." Philips said.
“Have either of you been visited by a…being of interest?” I inquired. “Not in the ‘here’s another inmate’ kind but a more…’I can offer you something’ kind of being?”
"Heh. Now that takes me back." Philips said. "Last being of interest I met aside my live here was Scrooge McDuck." I raised my eyes at that. I wasn't expecting that but… also, it did make sense. Phillips in his youth would vanish for up to months at a time and each time he returned it was with some new exotic or undocumented plant or means of genetic modifying… now it all makes sense. "He's an old business associate of mine. We traveled and if it wasn't for him, I'd have never met Contessa here."
"I'll admit, I owe the old duck that much." Contessa added.
"Gonna have to send that old duck a message one of these days…" I muttered. "Alright, so I presume neither of you have been visited by…Clockwork or anyone associated with him?" I asked carefully.
"Clockwork? I'm afraid I do not know anyone by that name. You know anything Contessa?" Phillips asked.
"Hmm… not really. Aside from some rumors about some supposed Ancient Metal Owl, no." She shrugged.
"Alright awesome." I let out a sigh of relief. "Now, I heard a rumor about you Contessa…about being an Off Worlder?" I inquired.
She sighed, but nodded. "It's true. I am not from this world. Few here even know of Off Worlders. But… well, long distance was killing me." She said, giving Phillips a kiss on his head. "I moved here and set up my own identity. Using some funds Philips provided I began having a prison built to continue the work of my people. Given what you have done and those you have taken down, I have had to make expansions."
"It's not illegal in any laws written, but Keyblades and some who consider themselves forces for order frown at it." Phillips added. "World Order they say."
"And World Order hasn't meant jack shit since the moment it was first mentioned." I shook my head, seeing the two surprised by my reaction to it. "Sorry about the…small outburst, but sorry for making your work a lot harder ma'am…just doing our best."
"I can't really complain. One more criminal off the streets means more and more public safety." Contessa said.
"Yep…but that sadly means others are getting…picked up by something worse…" I sighed. "But enough about that depressing topic, how long have you two been together?"
"Well, we met thirty years ago but Contessa and I have only been living with one another for the last six." Phillips said.
"I'd have arrived sooner but it's not easy to leave home and my duty." Contessa said. "Eventually though I finally came."
Phillips chuckled. "And it's been wonderful every day from morning til night. I only with my body was thirty years younger again. Cause I'd make an honest woman out of you the next morning." He chuckled, making Contessa blush and laugh.
Hmmm… well, most theories say she went mad and joined Klaww Gang because her husband passed… so, imma fix that. Souls and Nothingness are my primary domain… but a Nobody is still more or less a body.
"I think I can help you with that." I answered, causing the two to stare at me. "Please, don't panic, but there's gonna be some serious shenanigans about to happen."
I snapped my fingers. Using magic to restore his physical age to that of thirty years ago was easy. And just to be safe I also tied his lifeline to Contessa. Should one of them pass the other will also pass a day later. That being said I also added some passive protection wards around them to help them avoid dying from other external means, some wards of fast healing, fortify health, and given what they'll be doing soon fortify stamina and endurance.
Needless to say they were beyond thrilled.
I let the two of them enjoy themselves and went back home. Okay, so that's everyone from the Claw Gang… Just leaves the enemies and people from Honor Among Thieves and Thieves in Time.
"Right…so I help an old man see that people still like Opera, get Australia to not mine at the Guru's place…finally get Bentley and Penelope on a date…kick LeFwee's ass…but first, I have a skunk to deal with…" I growled.
To be continued...