The draconequus strolled through the throne room doors as if he owned the place, heading straight for the doors hiding the princess’s private clientele room.
“Should I even ask how you know where everything is?” Cadence said once inside, watching him raid the available sweets.
Discord sneered. “Please, Cadence, you insult me. The number of times I’ve entertained myself listening to ponies confess their hopeless love lives to you! Why, it’s even better than sitcoms on TV!”
“Excuse me?” Cadence angrily cried, clearly aghast.
“Now, now, no need to get your mane in a twist,” he said, waving his paw. Her hair twisted up like thousands of miniature springs before quickly unraveling back to normal. “As is your policy, their plights never leave this room. It’s not my fault you’ve never noticed my set of ears mixed in with the chandelier.”
She looked up to see his ears currently making themselves comfortable in the crystal hangings. Her scowl deepened.
“Discord, those conversations were private! Honestly! Do you even have an ounce of respect for anypony else's privacy?”
“Well of course I do!” he countered. “I’ll have you know there have been many opportunities to sneak a peek at Fluttershy’s diary but I’ve refrained every single time - even when she left it sitting wide open in plain sight one day I randomly popped in to visit.”
Cadence scowled. “Anypony besides Fluttershy?”
Discord thought a moment before shrugging, a shameless grin on his face. The princess scowled.
“From now on I would appreciate you respecting the privacy of every pony that comes in here!”
“Fine, fine, I’ll behave,” he drawled. “Now, let’s get down to brass tacks, shall we? I’m here because Fluttershy has decided to get her Soul Mark and I need you to tell me what to do about it.”
Cadence blinked. “Fluttershy is what?”
“She’s getting her Soul Mark,” Discord repeated, “In an hour, if I’m not mistaken. It is Saturday morning, is it not?” He pulled out a calendar that had the current date circled in red. “Time runs away from me in my own realm. If I didn’t have a cuckoo clock set to remind me of Tuesday Tea and Guy’s Night every week, I'd miss them altogether.”
“Fluttershy is what?!” Cadence repeated.
Discord rolled his eyes. “Honestly, Cadence, do you have a canary in your ear?” He pulled said bird from her right ear before repeating a third time, “She’s getting her Soul Mark. And if she does, the entire world is going to plunge into chaos because I honestly cannot handle the very thought of her being with somepony else! And Celestia help the stallion that ends up being her soulmate.” He spat the word and growled. “The poor creature will be in the puppet dimension the second I know who he is!”
Cadence leapt onto all fours, looking at him as if he were deranged. “If all this is true, why in the whole wide world of Equestria are you even here? If you love her, then stop her!”
Discord blinked. “Honestly? That’s all you’ve got for me?”
Cadence scowled. “Discord, do you love her?”
“I thought that was obvious!” he snapped. “I’m talking to you about her, aren’t I? Are you sure you’re the Princess of Love because you’re pretty bad at this. I’m here for advice, Cady!”
“If you already know how you feel, why do you need me to spell it out for you?” she retorted. “I know for a fact she’ll reciprocate your feelings so why don’t you just go and tell her?”
“Because I can’t!”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m immortal!" Discord shouted. "Because I can’t stand the thought of living in a world without her! And I don’t believe she’d be happy with having to leave me behind either. It would torture her. It would torture me. And yet the very thought of her with somepony else…
"Cadence, I don’t know what to do!” he cried. “If she gets her Soul Mark today, I… I'll unleash chaos across Equestria again! You weren’t born when I took over the first time. Chaos was slowly disappearing and I let my anger get the better of me because I couldn’t stand the rejection… I fear history may repeat itself.”
Cadence bit her lip and hesitantly prodded. “All those years ago, the reason you took over Equestria; it was because Celestia didn’t return your feelings.”
A humorless laugh escaped Discord. “Why does everypony believe it was Tia?”
“It wasn’t? But I thought…”
“So did everypony else,” he muttered, “Including many fans. No, the straw that finally broke this camel’s back was Luna.”
“Luna?!” Cadence gasped. “But… I’ve never seen the two of you together. Ever!”
Discord rubbed the back of his head. “There’s a reason for that. In the past the only thing I’ve ever been attracted to is chaos. My partners never lasted because the relationships died when their lives were fully devoid of disharmony. Lulu and I never actually had a relationship. I was merely attracted to the chaos raging inside her.”
"So, you’ve never actually been in love with anypony before?”
“Or creature,” he added, nodding. “Only the chaos they temporarily held.”
“Sweet Celestia,” Cadence muttered. “Fluttershy’s your first!”
Discord smiled, his pupils unintentionally reshaping into hearts. “The first and last, if I’m being honest. She’s done something nopony or creature has ever managed to do before."
His gaze drew distant as he thought of her. Her teal eyes. Her small, perfect form. Her ability to find order in the midst of pandemonium. (Taking care of all those animals day in and day out; how did she do it?) Her quirks. Her kindness. He shook his head. "I'm getting distracted."
"That usually happens when you think of the pony you love," Cadence smiled supportively.
Discord cleared his throat. "Yes… Well, back to the past. The anger Luna felt about being overshadowed by Celestia mixed with the love she still had for her. It was tearing her apart so badly her very magic was being infected. I felt and watched that conflict grow from a distance and thrived in it; the imbalance was like an enticing drug! Here was a pony, the most powerful I'd ever been attracted to, a princess even, who was rejected by her kind and left alone in the dark with her chaos; sweet, glorious chaos. She was just like me. So naturally I thought: 'Why would she not accept one who was also unappreciated by ponykind?' But when I tried to propose a relationship, she spurned me. This rejection (made by one who was an outcast herself) coupled with over a millennia of cruel treatment by ponies everywhere, finally tipped me over the edge.”
“I’m sorry,” Cadence muttered. She knew she wasn’t responsible for the actions of past ponies but she felt the need to say it anyway.
Discord merely shrugged it off. "It wasn’t your fault. Besides, my hostile takeover suited me just fine since Equestria had been purging disharmony from the land for years.”
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“Well, the uniting of ponykind ended the Wendigos for one and Starswirl finding and beginning Celestia and Luna’s reign didn’t help. But then the Pillars disappeared - something I originally celebrated- and Sombra began to rule over the Crystal Empire. Chaos was thriving. That is, until Cay-Cay and Lulu defeated Sombra and harmony once more started to invade. I confess I was thoroughly put out until I noticed Luna’s growing inner conflict. As stated before, I tried to get her on my side but was rejected. Thus my short reign began, Luna temporarily forgot her anger to help Tia imprison me, and the rest is history.”
“And now you’re afraid of causing another reign of chaos because Fluttershy’s getting her Soul Mark?” Cadence asked, slightly perplexed.
“She’s the first real friend I’ve ever had, Cadence,” he reminded. “My best friend. The only creature I've ever truly loved. Imagine that friendship, that love, ending and how I would personally react to it. I’ve already obliterated a star from the mere revelation of her getting a Soul Mark! Imagine what I’ll do to Equestria if she bonds eternally with somepony else! All of you think my first reign was bad…”
“I see your concerns,” Cadence muttered, trying not to panic.
If what Discord was saying was true, and he'd never truly loved any of his previous partners, Equestria was indeed in trouble! To think the fate of the world rested on the shoulders of a tiny yellow pegasus!
“Discord," she hesitantly began, "Will your friendship with Fluttershy really end if she’s with somepony else?”
“Well, yes,” he stated.
“Why?”
“Because I would end it.”
"And what about your love for her? Are you going to end that too and take over Equestria out of spite?"
"No!" he countered. "I'd take over Equestria, throw her soulmate into another dimension, and-"
"And what?" she angrily interrupted. "Keep her for yourself? Are you seriously that selfish? Discord, she would be miserable without her soulmate! A part of her would literally be missing. Not to mention she'd be forever disappointed by your behavior. Retaliating by conquering Equestria and throwing her soulmate into some abyss is not the way to fix this!"
"Then what is?!" he snarled.
"Wait,” she paused, rubbing her hoof against the side of her head, “Were you seriously going to keep her locked up like a prisoner?"
“Scorpan, no!" he cried, appalled. "Honestly, Cady, what kind of draconequus do you take me for? I'd never do anything like that to Fluttershy! I’d just make everything return to the way it used to be between us."
"When you were just friends?"
"Yes!” he said exasperatedly. “Because back then everything was perfect!"
"And you honestly want to go back to that?"
"Of course I do!" he huffed, crossing his arms. “This love nonsense has ruined everything!”
She held a skeptical stare. "So you’d be totally okay with going back to a platonic relationship, removing all physical affection besides that of an occasional friend-based hug?"
Discord froze, fully grasping what she was getting at. There would be no more snuggles. No more kisses! No more nuzzling each other's muzzles! The draconequus literally began to deflate at the thought, his body crumbling in an unruly heap as the sound of leaking air filled the room. He looked up at Cadence and scowled.
"You had to go and ruin my one solution, didn't you, princess?"
Cadence sighed. "I’m sorry. While I have no doubt that you could somehow use your phenomenal powers to revert the world back to how things used to be, living in the past is not the answer."
"Then what is?" he mumbled, using a car jack to crank his body back upright.
"How about stopping Fluttershy from getting her Soul Mark by confessing your feelings and living the life you so obviously and desperately want?" Cadence said. Discord opened his mouth to protest but she wasn’t done. "Stop hiding behind your immortality already and spend the rest of her life with her, for pony’s sake! You’ll make wonderful memories -memories you currently don’t have- and you’ll both be happy. Yes, she’ll die and you won’t, but it would be a crime to let the love you clearly have fizzle out instead of giving it a chance!”
“No, princess, what would be a crime is allowing her to be with me!” Discord snapped back, just as agitated. “Ponies hate me, Cadence! How do you think they’d treat her if I were to become her special somedraconequus?”
“Are you seriously going to let your happiness die because you’re afraid of what others think?” she rejoined.
“Yes!” he retorted. “You don’t get it, do you? The rejection I faced by ponies in the past was not just verbal, Cadence. They literally chased me out of their towns with torches and pitchforks! While none of those things could actually hurt me, the manner in which I was treated…" He paused, shaking his head, briefly stuck in past memories. Ones filled with nothing but anger, abuse, terror, and pain.
"I've had years to perfect brushing aside the snide comments and crude actions of others,” he muttered. “But Fluttershy hasn't. And I'm afraid she's too tender-hearted to grow callous to the mean things ponies can say and do. It’s hard enough for her just being friends with me. I’m well aware of what those ponies in Ponyville say about us. I could care less what they think of me - I stopped caring eons ago - but I do care about what they think and feel about Fluttershy. It will only grow worse if we become more than what we already are.”
“All creatures fear what they can’t understand,” Cadence consoled, “And I’m sorry I haven’t had the highest opinion of you in the past. But the feelings of others should not stop you from being with the pony you love. Standing side by side through every hardship, fighting opposition, strengthens love. It deepens and makes it all the more precious to you. Don’t you want to deepen your love with Fluttershy?”
“Of course I do!”
“Don’t you think she’d want to do the same for you?”
“I thought she did until she told me she was getting her Soul Mark,” he said. “Now I don’t know what to think!”
Cadence frowned. "Did it ever occur to you that maybe she’s getting her Soul Mark because you made her feel like she didn’t have any other choice?”
“What do you mean?” Discord asked, failing at hiding the guilty look on his face.
Cadence let out an exasperated sigh. He was really going to make her spell it out, wasn't he?
“You told her you couldn’t be together because you’re immortal and she’s not. Yet she has these deep feelings for you that aren’t going to simply go away. Neither of you want to lose the friendship you have so maybe getting her Soul Mark was her solution to end any further romantic feelings that could interfere with said friendship.”
The horn and antler on Discord’s head wilted like dying flowers as he covered his eyes with shaking hands. “This is all my fault,” he finally admitted.
“So it would seem,” she muttered sympathetically.
The draconequus agitatedly rubbed his face. “I’m such an idiot!”
Seemingly out of nowhere something forceful smacked into the back of the Chaos Lord's head. Yellow stars popped into existence, swirling around his skull. Rubbing the sore spot, Discord shooed the stars away and turned to reprimand Cadence but the princess was looking over his shoulder with a somewhat amused expression. He glanced back and saw Cordy Two standing there with a bat in his hands, the wooden surface sporting the words Reality Check in bold black ink.
“Well? What are you still sitting around here for?” he cried. “Go after her, you fool! Before it’s too late!”
Discord turned back to Cadence.
“I'm with him,” she agreed, waving her hoof. "I think you’ve wasted enough time already."
“But what if she doesn’t want me anymore?” he protested.
“Please,” Cordy Two scoffed. “How could she pass up the most handsome draconequus in Equestria?”
Cadence laughed. “He’s got a point. And, if it helps, I know for a fact she wants you. You’re in her heart; her chosen destiny. The one she’s meant to find. The apple of her eye. The sugar on-”
Discord threw up his hands. “Ugh, gag! I get the picture! Please stop.”
She laughed again. “Then get out of here, you lovestruck Purveyor of Pandemonium.”
Discord leaned forward. “You know, you’re not so bad, Princess of Love.” He produced a single yellow rose. “Thank you, Cadence,” he said, his tone turning serious as he held it out. “You may not believe it, but you saved Equestria today.”
She smiled, accepting the bloom. “I’m glad I could help.”
Discord grinned. Inclining his head, he stood up. Placing his paw over his heart and thrusting his eagle claw above his head, he began to proclaim, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a Fluttershy to wo-”
But Cordy Two cut him off, grabbing him unceremoniously around the middle. “No time!” he shouted, throwing him ruthlessly through a portal. “Honestly, he’s the King of Procrastination. Toodles, Cady! Keep up with the love therapy. You’re really good at it!” Wiggling his talons, he disappeared.
The princess blinked and then fell back laughing both at the absurd exit and as a means to release the tension she’d been feeling through most of their conversation.
“I think I’ll leave all future hero work to Twilight and the girls,” she said shakily. “Fluttershy’s got her hands full with that one. If she makes the right choice, that is.”
She could only hope that she would.