Chapter 24
– Counsel –
“Comet, you are doing splendidly. The Great and Powerful Trixie is most impressed.” Trixie said proudly.
Comet giggled and attempted the spell again, this time getting a bigger explosion than the last. She giggled and jumped in place, so proud of herself for getting the spell so easily. She was improving with magic, she could be a great magician.
“Thank you so much Miss Trixie, this is so cool!” Comet said, hugging Trixie’s leg again.
Trixie was again taken aback, as she was not used to this kind of treatment, especially from children. In fact, she didn’t have much experience with children other than the ones in the crowd at her shows. She patted Comet on the back and just let her do what she wanted.
As the two ponies shared a moment, Starlight looked at them from the back window of Trail’s home. She had wanted to give Trixie a chance to teach and decided it would be best to give the two space. She watched from the window to make sure nothing bad happened, but there was something else to it.
Starlight looked at the two making good progress so quickly. Sure the spell was relatively simple, but that didn’t stop Starlight from getting that pit in her stomach again. What was it?
She had been pondering the meaning of the feeling since Comet had first asked Trixie to teach her the spell. She had never felt it before, and had no idea what to do about it.
The backdoor opened, snapping Starlight out of her thoughts. Comet and Trixie came inside the house, taking notice of her. Starlight quickly composed herself and walked towards the two.
“So, it looks like the lesson went pretty well for you two. I could hear the fireworks from here.” Starlight said.
“Yeah! Miss Trixie showed me the spell and I got it super easy. I’ve never gotten a spell figured out this quickly.” Comet said.
“Trixie was quite impressed that she performed the spell so well. With practice, it will be even more spectacular.” Trixie said, flipping her cape behind her.
Starlight smiled, “Wonderful. Now let’s relax and have some tea in the living room.”
Starlight led them into the living room, where she had a tea set and pot all ready. Comet sat between Starlight and Trixie, taking a cup in her magic. The older mares took their cups as well, Starlight pouring everypony a cup.
“So where is your father?” Trixie asked.
“He and Auntie Zala went to see Zecora. They are still examining the basilisk corpse.” Comet answered.
Trixie gave a disgusted look, “Trixie can’t imagine being around something so disgusting.”
Starlight chimed in, “Well it is a pretty rare opportunity to study a basilisk. And a rich source of alchemy ingredients. Basilisk venom alone can go for several hundred bits.”
“Well, Trixie still finds it gross. But useful. Trixie still can’t believe that story about the field trip.” Trixie said, sipping her tea.
“I was there, and I still can’t believe it. If it wasn’t for Trail and his siblings, I wouldn’t be here.” Starlight said, smiling down into her tea cup.
Comet put a hoof on Starlight’s side, “I still feel bad you got hurt so bad. It’s why I want to learn as much magic as possible. To save ponies, like you.”
Starlight was shocked and almost shed a tear at those words. To hear Comet paint her in such a light, it made her heart jump.
“Oh Comet. You have nothing to feel bad about. And you will be a great mage. I’m sure of it. Maybe your cutiemark will represent your courage.” Starlight said.
“You think so!? I hope so. I’d love to be a great mage like you.” Comet said.
She then stood up and struck a pose in the middle of the room, “And I would vow never to use my magic for anything other than the good of ponies. Just like you, Starlight.”
Starlight froze at those words, looking at Comet with wide eyes, “What do you mean Comet?”
“I wanna be like you. A mare who always uses magic to help others. Protecting ponies and never using magic for anything other than good intentions.” Comet said gleefully.
Memories soon flooded Starlight’s vision, her life flashing before her eyes. Memories of her village, of traveling through time to ruin Twilight and her friend’s friendship, using magic to manipulate her friends. For so long, she had accepted her past. But now, it all came flooding back.
Starlight’s expression grew frantic, and Trixie soon saw the distress of her friend.
“Starlight, what’s wrong?” Trixie asked.
Starlight bolted as Trixie reached out for her, moving to the front door.
“I have to go.” Was the only thing Starlight said before she teleported away.
As she disappeared in a flash of light, Trixie and Comet stood there, stunned.
Comet turned to Trixie, “Did I do something wrong?”
Starlight reappeared in her room at Twilight's castle, breathing heavily and eyes still wide. She was having a panic attack, she needed to calm down. Taking deep breaths, she tried to calm herself, slowly making progress.
When her breathing got back to normal, she slumped into her bed and laid there for a few minutes. She didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t think, her mind too blurry from the incident. But as she tried to think about what just happened, the realization dawned on her.
She gasped and bolted up in her bed. She had just ran out on Comet. She could only imagine what that must have looked like to her student. What if she took it the wrong way?
She jumped out of bed and into the hallway, not thinking clearly. When she got out into the hallway, she ran right into her own mentor.
Twilight landed on her rump as she collided with Starlight, momentarily stunned. When she looked up, she saw Starlight.
“Starlight, what are you doing running in the hallway?” Twilight said.
Starlight flinched back, “I’m sorry Twilight, I didn’t mean to.”
Twilight saw the look in Starlight’s eyes, and that her mane was a little disheveled. For a moment, she saw herself.
“Starlight, what’s wrong? You look awful.” Twilight said.
Starlight opened her mouth to answer, but couldn’t make the words come out. She turned away from Twilight, not knowing what to do.
Twilight simply looked at her student, something was definitely wrong. She stepped forward and put a hoof on Starlight’s shoulder, lighting her horn and teleporting them to her study.
Starlight found herself sitting in a chair across from Twilight, the princess wearing her glasses and holding a notepad. Starlight slumped in her chair.
“And here I thought I was supposed to be the counselor.” Starlight said glumly.
“That doesn’t mean your teacher can’t listen to whatever is bothering you. Now, tell me what happened.” Twilight said.
Starlight hesitated for a moment, ashamed of what she was about to say.
“I don’t know exactly why it happened. But I ran out on Comet and Trixie.” Starlight said.
Twilight raised an eyebrow at that, “Didn’t you and Trixie have a magic lesson with Comet? Did it not go well?”
“No no, it went great. Comet got the firework spell working pretty easily. I was so proud.” Starlight said.
“But…” Twilight pushed.
Starlight slumped again, “I wasn’t even out in the yard when they were practicing. It was Trixie’s spell and I didn’t want to butt in on their lesson.”
“But you could have encouraged Comet. She always loves practicing with you.” Twilight said.
“I know. I just…” Starlight said, before turning her head away.
“Starlight, you can tell me anything.” Twilight said.
A tear fell from Starlight’s eye as she turned back, “Comet was so excited to learn from Trixie. More than she had ever been with me. What if Comet would rather have Trixie as a mentor than me? Did I do something wrong?” Starlight asked.
The tears were flowing now, Twilight could see how hard it was to admit for Starlight.
“Starlight, Comet loves having you as a mentor. She always talks about you. I hear her telling her friends about your magic lessons all the time.” Twilight said, her voice comforting.
“She does?” Starlight asked, looking directly at her.
Twilight got out of her chair and walked over to Starlight, sitting next to her.
“Starlight, just because Comet was excited for one spell, doesn’t mean she wants to replace you. Think about all you’ve taught her. She’s almost at the top of her magic class now. All from your tutelage. How could she replace that?” Twilight said.
Starlight was quiet for a moment, not knowing how to process this. She thought back to all their lessons together. Comet struggling with a spell, Starlight giving some extra suggestions and then Comet succeeded. Memories of their first lesson, when Comet was crying that she would never be good at magic. That moment where Starlight didn’t hesitate to hug the filly and tell her she did have talent. She loved that memory.
Starlight’s smile grew as the memories came back. Twilight saw the change and smiled herself.
“If you truly want to know, ask Comet. Let her know how you feel. You’ve come so far since I took you in Starlight.” Twilight said.
And with those words, the real reason Starlight ran away came back in full force. Starlight’s smile disappeared and she started to tear up again. She leaned in to rest her head by Twilight.
“It’s not just that. Something else came up.” Starlight said.
Twilight immediately grew concerned, “What happened?”
“Comet said she wanted to be like me. It didn’t bother me at first, but when she said that I never use magic for anything other than good intentions, it made me realize. Comet and Trail don’t know about my past.” Starlight said.
Twilight’s expression changed, concern and understanding mixed together on her face.
“And you think when they learn about what you did in the past, they will reject you?” Twilight said.
Starlight broke down at those words, realizing that was her worst fear at that moment. She cried into Twilight's foreleg, so scared of losing her student and her newest friend. She cried for a while, soaking Twilight's fur. Twilight did not move, only petting Starlight’s mane in an attempt to calm her down.
When Starlight had let it all out, she removed herself from her mentor.
“Starlight, friendship is stronger than that. I’ve forgiven you, so have our friends. Comet will understand. She has seen the good side of you.” Twilight said.
“And Trail?” Starlight sniffled.
“What about him?” Twilight asked.
“What if he doesn’t take kindly to my past?” Starlight said.
Twilight smiled.
“Trail has also seen the good side of you. Would an evil mare risk her own life to save his child and her friends?” Twilight said.
Starlight shook her head at that, saving the children was a good act. Her old self never would have done it. All the times with Trail at their coffee shop and talking in her office came back. All the times she had been invited to dinner with them. They had become so close.
“Starlight, tell them. Tell them everything you’re afraid of. Let it all out, and you’ll feel a lot better. I promise.” Twilight said.
Starlight got out of the chair and stood up, looking at Twilight again, “And if they see me differently?”
Twilight smiled, “They won’t. I think they will feel proud of you for sharing something like this. It’s not easy to admit your past mistakes. I felt that when I went back to Canterlot to visit my old school friends. Moondancer forgave me, even after I ditched her when she needed a friend.”
“You’ve done so much for Equestria. Defeating Queen Chrysalis, helping Thorax to change the changeling race all together. And helping Trixie to become a better pony too. You are a good pony Starlight.” Twilight continued.
Starlight nodded and smiled at her words, determined now to make things right and clear the air. Though as she walked away from Twilight and back in the direction of Trail’s house, a thought came to her. What happened with Comet explained why she was scared that Comet would reject her because of her past. But why was she worried about Trail? He wasn’t even home when she ran away.
Why did losing him seem just as horrible as losing her student? When she thought about him rejecting her, it hurt almost as bad as the thought of Comet rejecting her. And if she was truly being honest with herself, it hurt worse than Comet’s rejection. Why was that? What were all these new thoughts coming to her about? Why did Trail’s friendship matter to her so much?
All these thoughts caused Starlight to bump her head against the palace door, making her embarrassed and open the door outside and start running towards Trail’s home. What was wrong with her?