Starry Sky Studios, a quaint little art store nestled in one of the quieter corners of Canterlot. It had what most art studios have, paint, easels, brushes, canvas’s, but what it has which made it stand out in the community was the proprietor, Pastel Pallet. An earth pony mare with a cream-colored coat with patches of white, her mane was tied in a tri-tone braid of pink, yellow, and cyan with a cutie mark of a paint brush and pallet; who after years of discipline and struggle had finally set up a sanctuary where she can practice her trade in peace.
“Hmm, needs more blue-no! Periwinkle! But will it clash with the vermillion? Better not then,” Pastel mumbled to herself as her whole world and focus was devoted to her canvas and brushes. The muses have ushered her away to the upper echelons of creativity and thought as she mixed her paints and made the necessary alterations. This new piece would be her latest and greatest work. Or would it be not as great as her last piece? Pastel wasn’t entirely sure, but what mattered now was finding the right balance of colors.
Pastel loaded up her brush with paint and made very steady and controlled strokes. When her task was done, she took the brush out of her mouth and cleaned it in a murky water glass. “Huh. The periwinkle was wrong. Good thing I went with the aquamarine instead.” Pastel dipped her brush in more paint and was poised to begin the process all over again when the bell to her shop rang out. Pastel leapt from her seat and hurried down the stairs.
“Pastel!” Wit called out as he looked around the empty store. “You here? I really need to talk to you!”
The sound of thundering hooves echoed down the stairs as Pastel came bounding into the shop, with her paint brush still in her mouth.
“Oh geez…” Wit muttered as he instinctively pulled a blank canvas over with his magic. Pastel came to a screeching halt but the paint on her brush (as well as bits from her smock and mane) continued to fly towards the unicorn stallion. Wit quickly moved the canvas about, blocking any and all paint that came his way. After spinning the canvas, the resulting art had a very interesting and intricate spiral pattern.
“Hellooo Wit!” Pastel greeted.
“Hiya Pastel. I take it you were ‘zoned out’ when I got here?” Wit presented the piece of “spontaneous” art to Pastel who brushed some paint on her hoof and stamped the canvas. Wit then levitated it over to a wall with canvases of similar designs.
“Yep. One of these days I’ll remember to put my brush down before I greet ponies. So what brings you here? Just a friendly visit?”
Wit twiddled his hooves. “Uh, kinda.”
“Wiiiit?” Pastel pressed. “Is something on your mind?”
“Yeah. I really need somepony to talk to.”
Pastel wrapped her unpainted hoof around Wit. “Well what are besties for? Come up to the studio, we can talk more there.”
Pastel’s studio was the same as it’s always been. One side was relatively neat and organized, while the other was messy and paint stained. Pastel took her seat at her stool before the large canvas and started rearranging her paints. “Hmm, I need to remember to pick up more magenta. So, what’s wrong Wit? You seem a bit… nervous and glum. Did you have an unsuccessful comic hunt?”
Wit took a seat at one of Pastel’s spare chairs and groaned, “Ugghh, if only it was that. There’s… quite a lot of things to unpack.-“ his eyes quickly scanned the room and he closed Pastel’s windows and blinds. “-but you have to promise not to tell anypony.”
Pastel held up her painted hoof. “I promise. Now, what’s going on?”
“Well…” Wit gulped. “I seemed to have… unknowingly been mistaken for… Princess Luna’s fiancé.”
Pastel nearly fell off her stool. “Wait. Seriously!? When did you start dating Princess Luna!?”
“I’m not dating Princess Luna!” Wit cried. “But it seems Princess Cadence thinks that Luna and I are dating because of a conversation Luna and I had in my dream.”
“You sure you’re not dating her?”
“We’re not dating! Luna’s not even interested in me; she loves-!” Wit clasped his hooves over his mouth for fear of what Luna would do to him if he let her secret slip. Wit coughed, “Uh, she loves somepony else!”
“Oooh, she does?” Pastel’s eyes glittered at the chance of hearing some juicy royal gossip. “Who is it? Who is it?”
“Sorry, can’t tell you that. I made a strict promise and I am a stallion of my word.”
“And because Luna threatened you with, I don’t know, banishing you to the moon or Tartarus or something?”
“Also that.”
“Go on.”
“Anyway, I’ve been spending the last few weeks trying to help Luna work up the courage to finally confess to her special somepony, but she’s still too scared and one night she pulled me out of my favorite dream.”
“The one with the fan girls?”
“Yep.”
“Were there Kirin this time?”
“Oh yeah,” Wit said with a dopey grin. “Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, so she pulled me out of my dream and said she wanted to speak to me about that particular pony and invited me to the palace. When I got there, I learned that Princess Cadence somehow overheard us and mistook me for Luna’s actual true love.”
“And how did that go?”
Wit’s eyes glazed over as he found a very fascinating spot on the wall. “Uhhhh…”
“So how did you two meet?” Cadence asked fanatically. “Was it romantic or by chance? What’s your favorite color? Blood type? Star sign? What was your first thoughts when your eyes met? Did you get lost in them and never wanted to find your way out? How do you feel when you’re not together? Does it pain you like nothing else has in your entire life? Do you count the hours, nay the minutes you've been apart from one another?”
The only thing Wit wanted more than anything right now was the ability to phase through the floor as he was bombarded with the Princess of Love’s compatibility questions. “Um, we met in the park? But I’m not-“
“Oooh? A chance encounter?” Cadence wrote down some notes on a small pad. “Then what? Small talk? Dinner?”
“Small talk, but we’re not-“
“And when was your first date?”
“Date!?”
“Cadence, please!” Luna said coming to the poor stallion’s aid. “Wit’s just a friend!”
A smirk rose up from Cadence’s lips. “Oho? Not ready to make it official to the public yet? Well don’t you worry, that’s where I come in and I’ve got plenty of ideas!”
Off to the side, Celestia teleported a nice canvas chair and a bucket of popcorn and made herself comfortable before kicking back and watching the show. She tossed a hoofull of the buttery, salty treat in her mouth and sighed, “It’s good to be a princess.”
Luna was somehow able to pry the love pony away from her panicky friend. “Cadence! I’m honored that you want to help, but I can assure you that it’s all really unnecessary, so there’s no need to trouble yourself!”
Cadence waved a hoof. “Auntie Luna, it’s no trouble at all, I’m thrilled to help you! I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to find a special somepony; you and auntie Celestia for that matter.”
Celestia started coughing as an un-popped kernel hit the back of her throat.
“So not only am I more than happy to help, I’ll stop at nothing until you and Mr. Wit are the only thing Equestria’s talking about! From Applewood to Manehattan, you two will be the hottest topic.”
“Luna,” Wit whispered. “I think she’s serious. Maybe now would be a good time to just tell her that-“
Luna shoved her hoof in Wit’s mouth. “Oh no, Wit! You have to leave already? What a shame, well thanks for stopping by, I’ll show you out!” Luna’s horn flared and with a pop of Magic, Wit was gone.
“Next thing I know,” Wit continued as he massaged his temples. “I’m diving headfirst into a bush. The least she could’ve done was teleport me someplace softer, or my house.”
“She knows where you live?” Pastel asked as she dipped her brush into a paint mixture.
“To be honest, I wouldn’t be surprised at this point. She seems to always know where I am and where I’ll be. It’s kinda creepy.”
Pastel tapped her brush to her chin, accidentally painting it lavender. “So, what you’re telling me, is that you keep getting dragged into random shenanigans because Princess Luna can’t seem to work up the nerve to tell the pony she actually loves and since you’re with her most of the time, that makes you her coltfriend?”
Wit nodded. “Yep, that about sums up the story of my life right now.”
“Well, if you ask me, I think that the easiest solution is to get the two of them together and hopefully the problem will solve itself.”
Wit perked up. “You know, that’s not a bad idea. I can get the two of them together in, I don’t know, a pottery class or maybe a dance festival or something. Thanks Pastel, I owe you one!” Wit gave Pastel a hug and ran out the room.
“Good luck!” Pastel called out before all her focus was devoted to her canvas.
Wit trotted through the Canterlot park and planted his flank down on a familiar bench. Taking a moment to breath in the aroma of the fresh cut grass, the gentle buzz of bumble bees, the soft tune played by the ice cream vendor and the morose princess of midnight currently eating a ripple fudges cone, with another two on the sidelines awaiting their fate.
“Ah Luna,” Wit remarked feigning surprise. “What are the chances of seeing you here?”
Luna devoured her cone and moved on to the second one. “This is terrible Wit!” she said dramatically. “This is downright mortifying! I just can’t believe Cadence! Jumping to conclusions, asking us all those questions! You know she’s trying to come up with a nickname for us as we speak?”
“Nicknames?”
“Yes, like, ‘LuWit’ and “Witna’! Don’t you know that a catchy nickname for couples is what solidifies them in society and pop culture? Next thing we know, they’ll start writing stories about us, or making art of us together!”
“Tasteful I hope,” Wit muttered.
Luna sighed as she turned to her last ice cream cone and gave it a few sad licks. “She won’t stop until she’s micromanaging our nuptials. Ugh! This is all so frustrating! And all because I can’t admit to Twilight that I love her!”
“Oh, ho?” came a flighty voice. “What juicy gossip did I just stumble into?” in a puff of smoke, a lanky and mismatched creature appeared before the princess and her unicorn friend.
“Discord!” Luna gasped. “Y-you didn’t hear anything! I was just rehearsing a play!”
“Geez, a little louder princess,” Wit commented. “Maybe Twilight will hear you all the way in Ponyville and we can put this whole thing behind us.”
“Well this is truly a surprise,” Discord said as he poofed between the ponies on the bench. “Princess Luna bitten by the love bug? And our poor, hapless Silver Wit. Nice to see you working on this again by the way.”
Wit tilted his head. “Huh?”
“Choose thine words very carefully trickster! Why art thou here?” Luna barked.
Discord snapped his talon as a strange device fell in his paw and he was now sporting a lab coat and glasses. “My C.K.E meter was going positively bananas,-“ he emphasized this by showing the arms of the strange device going up and down on the sides as it emitted beeping sounds and a picture of a banana showing on the screen. “-and I wanted to know where all this potent chaos was coming from. And who do I find at the source? A love sick princess unable to say what her heart truly desires and a stallion in a rather difficult position.”
“Discord,” Luna snarled. “if thou wish not to return to stone, thou wilt not breath a single word of this to anypony!”
“And ruin all the fun?” Discord asked, totally unfazed by Luna’s threat. “Why in the world would I want to do that?”
“Plus, you’ve been having no trouble telling other ponies yourself princess.” Wit snarked. “Just not the one that matters.”
“I-I do not, um, do that!” Luna huffed. “There’s just a lot of nosy ponies is all.”
Wit rolled his eyes. “I keep telling you about your ‘inside voice’, but you just can’t seem to grasp the nuance.”
“Well be that as it may,” Discord said as he squeezed Luna and Wit to his sides. “I’m just so thrilled to have such a great wellspring of chaos from somepony other than myself. Keep up the good work you two, I’ll be keeping a close watch on your progress!” and with that, Discord vanished.
“Huh. That was… something…” Wit remarked.
“Ugh, this is getting more and more out of hoof with each passing moment!” Luna leaned forward and placed her head in her hooves.
“Which is why I wanted to give you another idea on how you can get Twilight to notice you.”
Luna perked up. “Really? How?”
“Why don’t we go to Ponyville and see if there are any special events going on? I mean, from what I’ve heard, Ponyville has parties and festivals almost every other day. I can be your mediator and possibly arrange some alone time with Twilight.”
“That’s a brilliant idea!” Luna cheered. “Very well, I leave it to you my love advisor. Let us be off to Ponyville!” and with a glow and a flash, Luna and Wit teleported away to a very familiar town.