The story of how Fluttershy became so acquainted with the stars was a somber one indeed. Fluttershy had told nopony else this story, so why she would she tell it to Luna? The same question ran through Fluttershy's mind several times over since she offered. She wasn't even sure why she said it, it just kind of... came out.
"Oh... actually, I'm not so sure Luna. It's just...it's kind of... a sad story. Are you sure you want to hear it?" She let out the last sentence in nothing more than a small squeak.
Luna's face showed traces of confusion as she turned to the skies. "3 minutes.." she whispered. Luna closed her eyes and thought for a moment. Fluttershy was just about to prod Luna to make sure she hadn't fallen asleep when she finally spoke up. "Fluttershy.. when one has lived as long I, you hear many ponies stories: both sad and joyous. I would still like to hear it, if you would allow me." said Luna, smiling lightly at the frail Pegasus. Twas true, Luna had heard, and been present for many tales. She has seen the reactions to all matters of troubles, and could tell that deep down Fluttershy was troubled by something, even to this day.
Luna's smile seemed to penetrate Fluttershy's very soul. Her chest fluttered and she felt a blush dance across her face. She wasn't used to people caring about what she had to say, most people just assumed that she was, and had always been a nervous wreck. Nopony ever bothered to ask about it because, as she assumed, nopony cared to know. Yet here was Luna, a Princess no less, asking about a simple town pony. Fluttershy felt extremely honored, yet at the same time, now obligated to tell Luna about it. How could she deny a Princess?
"O-of course Luna.." Fluttershy took a deep breath, bracing herself for the telling of the reason she was the way she was, the reason she was so afraid, the reason Fluttershy couldn't get to close to most ponies. All because Luna asked how she came to like the stars...
"W-well.... it started back before I was even in flight school. I was tiny... just a little filly..."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
(Flashback)
It was a warm day in Cloudsdayle and Fluttershy couldn't be happier. Her parents had promised to take her to the cloud park to play with the other fillies preparing to go flight school. The play dates her parents set up were always fun, and never failed to disappoint.
Fluttershy's parents often had trouble controlling the bouncing ball of energy that was Fluttershy. She was always the first to run into the playpen, yet always the last to leave it.
Today was no different, she happily bounced to meet her friends at a swing set in the park while her parents walked over to sit on a bench with the other parents. Fluttershy had always wondered what the grown-up's talked about, but was always to busy with her friends to go find out.
"Oooh! I'm gonna be a secret agent.. Hey everypony, I'll be back later ; I'm gonna to be a detective!" said Fluttershy, hopping off in the direction of her parents, making extra sure not to be seen. She managed to sneak into a fluffy green bush seated behind the bench.
Fluttershy's father, Sunburst, was a horrible drunk, but thanks to her mother, Linda, she had never known this. Her mother would always take the brunt of his drunken rage. He would frequently scream at Linda, occasionally going as far as to strike her. Linda never did anything about it though, she figured after the murder of his parents he was just using this as an outlet to his emotions. Fluttershy was never around for these outburst thanks to strategic planning by her mother. She promised herself she would never let anything happen to her only daughter.
Fluttershy had picked the wrong day, the wrong time, the wrong everything, to decide to spy on her parents. Linda didn't know it at the time, but Sunburst had downed a few shots before coming out today. His mood was quickly deteriorating as he argued about Linda becoming a stay at home mom.
"Wh..what the hell? You act like Fluttershy can't watch herself! Hell, she'll be going to Flight school next year for buckin' sake.." Being an alcoholic for many years, Sunburst was able to speak with very little slur at all.
"I just think it would be better if one us stayed home to take proper care of her. I worry about her. I worry about you to you know. You've been drinking again haven't you?" said Linda, a disappointed look on her face.
"And what if I have!? How is it any of your business if I drink?!" Linda opened her mouth to speak up but was interrupted by a loud squeak coming from behind them. Fluttershy was becoming increasingly frightened by her father. He was yelling way louder than she had ever heard him before, and she was frightened.
"What the fuck was that?" Sunburst turned to the bush behind them, eyeing through it to find the source of the strange sound.
"Just forget it... it was probably just a bird.." said Linda, tears forming in her eyes. The stress of this new argument, and the violent one they had before coming to the park weighing down on her.
"No.. there's some little shit brained br-...ooh, Fluttershy. What the hell are you doing hiding in the bushes? You weren't spying on me and your mother, were you?!" He had pulled her out of the bushes and was now holding her above the ground by her mane.
Fluttershy shook her head, turning her head to avoid looking at her father. She had convinced herself that if she didn't look at him, that she could still hold onto the notion that this wasn't her father, that this was just an impostor, pretending to be him.
"I think you were..- Look at me!" He snatched her head, jerking it to make her look at him. Fluttershy felt her head jolt. Now that she was looking into his eyes, there was no way she could deny what was really happening.
Linda saw this and pushed Sunburst, making him drop Fluttershy on the ground. "Don't touch her like that, you pig!" she screamed. The other ponies parent's had long left the scene, hoping to not get involved. Linda hated them for this, how could they be so cowardly as to just ignore the escalating situation?
"Oh yeah...? What are you gonna do about it!?" He kicked Fluttershy, just hard enough to knock her over. The kick did very little damage, but it wasn't the physical effect that bothered Linda as much as it was the emotional.
Linda said nothing, afraid of what her crazed husband would do next. She sat silently, teary eyed, defeated. She wasn't as strong as him. She had learned before that if she just gave up, he would usually stop.
"Nothing to say eh...? Didn't think so. Come on, we're going home then.." He turned to look at Fluttershy. "And when we get there, I'll make sure you get what's comin' to ya'..." Both Fluttershy and Linda cringed at this.
He grabbed Fluttershy by the mane again and forcefully threw her onto her mothers back and began to drag them back to their cloudtop house.
- - - - - - - -
When they arrived at the small house on the corner that was their home, Sunburst slammed the door closed behind them, causing Fluttershy to jump. "Now... to deal with you..." He raised his hoof, prepared to strike the yellow Pegasus that very much resembled his wife. "This will teach you to spy you littl- OOF!"
Linda had decided that she had to stop her husband. She valued the innocence, and protection of her daughter way more than her husband. She knew this time would be different, he wasn't going to just stop and let it be. She struck him with an old baseball bat from Sunburst younger years, which hurt his pride more than anything.
"Hey! I thought I told you to wait your tur- ugh..I think you broke a rib, fucking bitch. Fine, you can go first.." He turned his attention to his wife, who was now charging him again. He grabbed the bat with his mouth though, and easily over powered her, throwing her to the ground. He threw the bat to the side and began to viciously stomp Linda.
"Hope...you...fucking...learn...your....lesson...this...TIME!" the last stomp unleashed a loud cracking sound. Fluttershy screamed for her father to stop, but he paid no mind. All he could think about was 'the bitch that broke his ribs'.
"St-stop it! Think about your daughter, think about what your putting her through!" Linda screamed, now fighting back the blood oozing from gashes across her face and hooves.
"Oh...I'm sure she'll be fine...she's just like her mother after all..." He reared back his leg and let it crack into her head. Almost instantly she slumped and fell face first in her own blood.
He had busted her skull, killing her from a brain hemorrhage. "Oh...shit. Oh well.." Linda's body now laid, unrecognizable in a puddle of crimson blood. Sunburst many stomps had completely distorted her face, leaving it nothing but a red blob.
Fluttershy had retreated to a corner, now sobbing loudly. She had stopped watching once the beating ended and was now only hearing the altercation. The crunching sound was the worst, it scarred her, leaving the mental imprint of her mothers death deeply embedded in her mind. She started violently shaking and whimpering as fresh tears fell from her face.
"Pl-please. Just let me wake up, let me go back to yesterday. Let this all be a sick dream, and just end it. Please..."
"What are you pleading for? Ain't no dream darling..." said Sunburst, now advancing towards Fluttershy.
"G-...get back! Your a monster!" she screamed, kicking and flailing her hooves at any part of Sunburst she could reach. He almost found it amusing, making a game out of dodging her.
"I'm a monster...? I'm a monster?! No...no, the real monster is your mother...I mean, look at how she left you. I thought she was supposed to protect you? What happened to that?" He was mocking her name, getting joy out of torturing her. He looked over at his now dead wife. "Son of a bitch...how could this happen..." Fluttershy whimpered again, trying to crawl towards the door. "Where do you think your going?! This is all your fault!"
He beat her and beat her, despite her constant pleas for him to stop. He was taking out years of agony from his childhood on this poor filly. He stomped, kicked, and swiped at her several times, causing the poor Pegasus to scream in pain. Sunburst figured that the neighbors probably heard, but he didn't care anymore. He had nothing to live for, if he ever did.
- - - - - - - - -
listen to this for the next scene (um...if that's okay with you)
Fluttershy had just spent the last hour being abused by her father, having his drunken rage being taken out on her over and over again. After the first hour she had just spaced out, taking whatever he did to her as it came. Even the tears stopped, she had become numb to anything at all. Now she was being flown to a small field on the ground, far away from Cloudsdayle..
He landed in the field and dropped Fluttershy next to a tree. He had sobered up a bit, but he knew deep down that after what he had done this was for the best. Not only would he soon be going to jail for murder, he had just put his daughter through the most horrific experience she may ever go through. He knew what he had to do to appeal for his sins.
He sat there next to her, staying quiet for several minutes. She was still numb to emotion and just laid on her back, staring at the sky. It was a clear night, the stars spread out across the sky. You would think living above the clouds that she would often see the stars, but she had never bothered, she was always to busy. For the first time since all this had happened, she had a clear though. There was something she had to know before he left.
"D-...daddy.." Sunburst snapped out of his teary daze and turned to look her in the eyes. He felt disgusted at himself for even looking at her now.
"y-yes...Fluttershy." His voice cracked from a combination of the tears and utter shame.
"...why didn't you kill me...like mommy..?" Sunburst cringed, fresh tears streaming from his eyes. He knew the answer, even through his drunken stupor one thing always kept him from doing to much damage to her. He only prayed that after this was all over she would go to some family that could watch her, and treat her like she deserved to be treated.
"It-...it was your smile. You have.. her smile.... my mothers. It's JUST like hers...it's almost scary how much you two are alike...now that I think about it. She was always there for me. I loved her more than anything... your smile was the last thing I had left of her...." Fluttershy made no further response, no more than Sunburst expected. She just continued to stare up at the night sky, as if entranced by it.
He let out one final sigh. "I know this means nothing, and I don't expect forgiveness, nor do I deserve it...but I'm sorry Fluttershy..." He clenched his eyes tight, wringing them of tears and walked over to the cliff located about 100 meters away. "I guess...it's time for us to be reunited. It's more than I deserve, but maybe I can get a second glance from your mother...nah... I doubt that.... we won't be going to the same place, after all..." he said, closing his eyes. He shut his wings tight and dove off the cliff, falling towards eminent death.
Fluttershy, still lying on her back, knew what just happened. She didn't care though, not anymore. She didn't care about anything, she didn't even care if anyone found her. They surely would though, Sunburst made sure to leave her in a frequently visited park, at most she would have to spend the night alone before being found.
She stared at the sky's endless vast blanket of stars, feeling as if her worries were being wiped clean. She felt it easy to get lost in the endless patterns of the night sky. She found solace in them, a light in the shining darkness. They allowed her to escape from her misery, if only for a moment...
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"And that's how I got my love of stars...if it wasn't for them, I'm not sure I'd even be here..... they helped me through the night..the worst night.." Fluttershy's story had lasted a lot longer than she expected. She originally just planned to tell her the basics, but she soon found herself pouring her heart out to Luna. She shocked even herself with this.
Luna, no longer caring about the Midnight Star Celebration sat crying silently. Over her immense life she had never been so openly told such a horrific story. She reached a hoof over to wipe the tears from Fluttershy's face. She tried to think of comforting words, but found none. So, she did the only thing she knew to do, she hugged her. She hoped the hug would vocalize every word she wanted to say, and provide the yellow Pegasus with at least a shred of comfort.
Fluttershy blushed at first, but ended up just resting her head on Luna's shoulder, crying away years of repressed pain. This was the first time she had been so open about it, and it felt good to let it out after all these years. They sat under the stars, the brightest stars of the year, sharing the moment.
Several minutes later Luna finally thought to check the time. She realized that it was well later than she intended. The party had been over several hours, but they were both to involved in the story to notice.
"Fluttershy..I'm sorry, but it appears to be really late..."
"Oh, its quite alright..I don't mind..."
"No this could be problematic, your not going to be able to get a ride this late at night..." Luna lied, she could very easily order one of her guards fly her home, but she didn't want the night to end. She wanted to keep this emotional connection going...
"So the only option I see is for you to room with me tonight.."
"sh-..shouldn't we talk to Celestia first..?"
"Nonsense Fluttershy, you forget, I am a Princess as well." Luna was now smiling, grabbing Fluttershy by the hoof.
"Come on, I'll lead you to my room"
"Oh...okay.." Fluttershy smiled. She thought she looked horrible, her eyes puffy from crying, and her hair disheveled from resting her head on Luna's shoulder. Maybe Luna would let her freshen up a bit, at least?