Pinkie was not having a great day.
It started out fine! Like every day does. Waking up, baking at Sugarcube Corner, throwing any birthday parties needed around town, helping run the school now that Twilight was off on her vacation, all fun things.
The problems started when she ran into a shady individual roaming the school grounds.
“And now I’m learning that the headmaster herself has left the country? What kind of hairbrained leader just toddles off the second they’re needed? This is a gross example of mismanagement.”
Neighsay started ranting nonstop when Pinkie had stopped him from breaking into the record room near the back of the school. It wasn’t even because there was anything bad back there that he shouldn’t find. She just knew Starlight was working really hard organizing everything with Twilight gone and Pinkie didn’t want her to be interrupted.
Just like Dashie had mentioned last time she saw him, Neighsay still had two beefy earth ponies following closely behind him. They didn’t say much, just stood there looking big and scary. Pinkie wasn’t sure if he kept them around because he was honestly scared Smolder or Ocellus would attack him or just to intimidate any creature who dared to try and stand up to him.
Either way, it did make all the students give him a wide berth and so the conversation they were having could almost be seen as private.
“And what are you doing out here anyway? You’re a teacher aren’t you? Why aren’t you teaching?”
Pinkie cocked her head at him as he glared down at her. It sucked that he was so tall. It was much easier to not look intimidated when you didn’t have to crane your neck up. “Huh? Don’t you go to tons of schools? Teachers don’t teach at every second. I’m on my lunch break.”
That wasn’t… entirely true. It wasn’t entirely false either, she was on break, but the truth of the matter was the school didn’t have too many students in it and so there were often long stretches of downtime where the teachers could run off to do their other jobs or save the world again.
Or make sure no meanie pants were trying to break in.
“Well… yes,” Neighsay sniffed, thrown off a bit at her answer and attitude. If there’s one thing Pinkie learned while fighting big world-ending threats it was that baddies got really confused when you didn’t get angry or scared at them, “Fine. Since I have you here and the Headmistress seems to be indisposed I would like to know why you have decided to bring more Changelings into this little treason factory of yours.”
Pinkie’s brow furrowed in confusion. “More Changelings? What more Changelings? The only Changeling we have right now is Ocellus.” She stopped and tapped her chin as a thought came to her. “At least… I think so… I guess I wouldn’t be able to tell if they snuck in. But why would more sneak in? They can just enroll if they really really want to! We only have the one because King Thorax thought everyling else should take time to adjust to not starving anymore. But I guess it’s possible that-”
“Stop blathering this instant!” Neighsay snapped, a vein bulging right below his horn, “The Changelings! Those two that were taking the form of the Headmistress and Miss Dash just the other day. Miss Dash, the real one, said they were also enrolled here.”
“Ooooooh.” That clicked it into place. “You mean Evening and the other clones.”
Neighsay’s eyes widened and he took half a step back in shock. “I-I beg your pardon. The what?”
“The clones!” Pinkie explained with a happy little hop, excited to be talking about her brand new best friends. That was a nice word to say with excitement and not cringing embarrassment. “They’re clones of me and the rest of the girls, but don’t worry, they’re their own ponies now. We decided they should come to school to learn how to be good little ponies and I don’t know if I should be telling you this.” Her hopping slowed and her smile became hesitant. “Actually, I don’t know if I should really be telling anyone this, especially not you… oops.”
Neighsay was gaping at her like she had just told him Discord had turned his house into swiss cheese. “You’re… you’re letting constructs into your school? Magical puppets? What in Equestria for? Is your sorry excuse for a school such a failure you have to invent students to fill seats?”
There were a lot of mean things in that little speech but Pinkie latched onto the first one that struck her. “They’re not constructs! They’re real ponies! Just because they were made of dark magic doesn’t mean they don’t have thoughts and motives of their own!”
“Dark Magic???” Neighsay shrieked, “You’re doing dark magic in that school???”
“No silly.” Pinkie rolled her eyes. “We didn’t make them. Dark magic is definitely a no-no at the School of Friendship.”
“You didn’t make them? Then who did?”
“That one’s easy. Chr-”
“Pinkie!”
Pinkie Pie flinched at the scolding tone as both Neighsay and his guards turned to regard the new voice.
Starlight Glimmer had come out of the record room, probably because of all the shouting, and was now approaching the little group with a glare that could scare your cutie mark off.
Heh, get it?
“Pinkie, what is Neighsay doing here?” Starlight asked, ignoring the other Unicorn besides shooting him a deathly look. “And why are you telling him about our, ahem, new students?” She glanced around, possibly trying to find other things to glare at, but all the other ponies in the courtyard had completely scattered when Neighsay had started screeching.
“I was trying to find out that exact thing!” PInkie answered the first question, choosing to ignore the second. She was pretty sure it was rhetorical anyway. Probably. “He’s just lurking around even though Twilight told him not to come back.”
Starlight narrowed her eyes and Pinkie shivered a little. “Maybe if he’s not allowed here then we don’t tell him anything he wants to know, right?”
Pinkie nodded rapidly and Starlight, seemingly satisfied, turned to finally face Neighsay. “And you. I believe she is correct in the fact that you’re not supposed to be here. So get out.”
Neighsay sniffed and stood up straighter, trying to not look caught off guard. Pinkie didn’t blame him though, Starlight could be scary when she wanted to. “I demand to know more about these dark magic clones running around this so-called school.”
“No,” Starlight said bluntly, “We are not a part of the EEA system. Who we let attend is quite frankly none of your business. Now get off the school grounds or you will be forcefully removed.”
On cue, the two beefy ponies behind him moved up in a threatening manner as Neighsay continued to seeth. “Young lady if you so much as lay a hoof on-”
A flash of teal magic erupted out of Starlight’s horn and with a blink Neighsay and his two goons were gone.
“Did you send them to the moon?”
Starlight turned an incredulous look on Pinkie. “What? No! I just teleported him off of school grounds. Why would you even think…” She stopped, took a deep breath through her nose, and then continued again more calmly. “Pinkie, why were you telling him about the clones?”
Pinkie smiled awkwardly. “Well I didn’t really mean to. He met Evening and Parade in town the other day and was wondering who they were. I got a little carried away and accidentally told him they were clones… but I wasn’t going to tell him any more than that! But then he started saying they were just puppets and not real and that’s not true so I had to-”
“Stop. Stop, I get it,” Starlight said. She had started messaging her temple somewhere through Pinkie’s explanation. “That was… noble of you… but I thought Twilight wanted to keep their existence under wraps for now?”
“She did,” Pinkie agreed, ears folding back in embarrassment, “and I really think that’s a smart decision on Twilight’s part, the clones need time to adjust, for sure. But it should be fine! Neighsay already hates us, what’s he gonna do with more reason to hate us?”
Starlight didn’t seem completely sold on Pinkie’s flawless reasoning but she did take a few deep breaths and nod her head, not pushing the issue farther. “I guess. I just don’t want any more trouble. Twilight’s away, which, while I agree is good for her, puts a lot of pressure on the rest of our shoulders. Hay, I don’t even know if the clones still want to kill me, specifically, so you can kind of imagine the pressure I’m under.”
“Aw, you worry too much, Starry,” Pinkie said with a wave of her hoof, “the clones aren’t like that. They’re really nice!”
Starlight frowned which was not what Pinkie had been going for. “Okay, first off. Don’t call me that. Second off, you know I’m big on second chances, I am! And I do think they deserve a second chance. But I don’t know if they’ve really… learned the error of their ways so to speak. They’ll get there, I’m sure, but for now… I’m kind of keeping my guard up.”
Pinkie hummed in thought and then leaned in close, a knowing smile on her face. “You know what I think? I think you just have a scary shape shifting evil bug lady with a personal agenda against you running around and that’s making you jumpy.” She clapped Starlight on the back. “But that’s just what it means to be a hero! You’ll get used to it.”
Starlight stumbled a little and fixed Pinkie with an incredulous expression. “Wha- of course that’s making me jumpy. I’m literally saying that I’m being cautious around them because they’re directly a part of that personal agenda. It’s a very normal reaction to have.”
“And you know what will fix that?” Pinkie pressed.
“Capturing Chrysalis?”
“Getting to know the clones! Then you’ll see they aren’t as scary and out-to-get-you as you think they are.”
Starlight pursed her lips. “I don’t know… even if they are like you say I don’t want to stress them, and myself, out more than I have to. What if being around me activates something in them?”
“And what if you seeing them all have cutie marks activates something in you?” The death glare was back, stronger than ever, but Pinkie pushed forward regardless. “They’re not robots, Starlight, they’re just ponies. Didn’t you feel better when ponies you hurt actually talked to you after you said sorry?”
The glare slipped off of Starlight’s face and was replaced with a guilty look. “Yeah… I guess that is true. Maybe I’m being unfair.” Starlight took a deep breath, steeling herself, and nodded. “Okay, let’s go talk to the clones.”
Pinkie couldn’t help but leap in joy. “Hooray! Now let’s go find one! Let’s see…”
She trailed off as she scoped around the courtyard, hoping to find one of the clones just wandering around. The class change must have happened while they were arguing because students were starting to wander out of the school in large groups, chatting to each other excitedly about what they had just learned.
Luckily, one of those students just so happened to be who Pinkie was looking for.
Unluckily, it was Vanilla Dream.
Pinkie suppressed a flinch she hoped Starlight didn’t see. It wasn’t that she didn’t like Vanilla, the pink clone hadn’t been any less friendly than the others, Pinkie just got a teeny weenie bit uncomfortable around her, and being uncomfortable definitely wouldn’t help Pinkie make Starlight not uncomfortable. Maybe she could pretend she hadn’t seen Vanilla and spot somepony else…
“Isn’t that one of them there?”
Pinkie turned to see where Starlight was looking and, shoot, she was looking at Vanilla too. Recognizing that her fate was sealed, Pinkie put on her most excited smile and acted like she too had just spotted the clone.
“Oooh, you’re right! Let’s go over and say hi.” She grabbed Starlight’s leg and, ignoring the Unicorn’s startled protests, dragged her over to Vanilla.
They weren’t being particularly subtle so Vanilla looked up almost immediately as they zigzagged their way through the crowd. She seemed irritated, as usual, but a curious expression ghosted her face when she saw who Pinkie was dragging along and didn’t even flinch as the two ponies screeched to a stop in front of her.
“Hi Vanilla!” Pinkie greeted, waving at the clone even though she was standing a foot in front of her.
“Me,” Vanilla greeted back bluntly before turning her attention to Starlight, “And Starlight Glimmer. You know I actually didn’t think I’d run into you while we were here.”
Starlight awkwardly scratched her neck. “Well, I am the counselor so if you spent enough time at this school you’d have to come see me. Uh, but it’s nice to get to meet you right now.”
Vanilla simply stared at Starlight, thoughtfully, while Starlight stared awkwardly right back. Pinkie watched both of them eagerly. Getting past this first hurdle would definitely make the clone’s integration much smoother.
Then Vanilla kicked Starlight in the shin.
“Ah! What the buck?” Starlight cursed, stumbling back and clutching her right foreleg.
Every pony that had been milling about instantly turned to look as their counselor swore, a few even creeping closer to get a better look.
“Vanilla!” Pinkie scolded, rounding on the clone, “What did you do that for?”
Vanilla Dream, for her part, was staring at her own hoof in fascination. “Wow, that actually was pretty fun.”
“No, no, no, no.” Pinkie swatted Vanilla’s head like one would a naughty dog that had just learned how to bite. “That is not how you make friends, Vanilla.”
“Ack.” Vanilla flailed a hoof to wave off Pinkie’s swats. “But it was funny. And she sucks.”
“It was not,” Pinkie said sternly, “and she does not. You can’t just hit ponies you don’t like and even if you could hit ponies you don’t like you don’t even have a reason not to like her!”
“You dislike her,” Vanilla shot back, her signature annoyed expression back.
Pinkie blinked, completely caught off guard by that shift in subject. A few of the watching students around them oohed. “Huh? That’s silly, no I don’t.”
Vanilla Dream leaned in real close so the two pink pony’s snouts almost touched. But they didn’t. Because Pinkie backed away a half step. “Yes you do. I can see it in your memories. You’re mad at her for mind-controlling you after she got reformed.”
“Hang on,” Starlight said, annoyance, and a little trepidation in her voice as all the watching eyes turned to her, “I feel like we’re getting off topic from you kicking me-”
“You can see my memories?!?” Pinkie gasped, clutching at her head just in case the memories were somehow leaking out of her ears. “How are you doing that? Can you tell what I’m thinking right now?”
“Uhg, no,” Vanilla said, rolling her eyes, “How do you think I know how to talk and stuff?” She tapped her own head. “I have some scattered memories from every part I’m made up of. Yours are dumb though. You keep doing boring stuff and pretending that it's fun. Seriously, why were you so excited about a dumb walk or talking to ponies or junk?”
“Wait, really?” Starlight asked, her irritation momentarily forgotten, “If that’s true then…” she paused, glancing around at the ponies who were trying with little success to look like they weren’t listening. Leaning in close to Vanilla, Starlight whispered, “then do you also have some of the other creature’s memories?”
“Yep,” Vanilla said flatly, “and they tell me that you’re a half pint loser. Who smells. And can’t get a girlfriend.”
Starlight reared back, irritation quickly unforgotten as her horn started to spark dangerously. “Okay that is it! Pinkie, I’m sorry but I am not putting up with this any longer. Everypony stand back.”
Vanilla stuck out her tongue as Pinkie tried to put herself between the two angry ponies and everypony else obediently scattered away from what, in their minds, must surely be a fight about to brew. “H-hold on Starlight. I’m sure-”
“What the buck is going on now?”
The three of them turned to see Evening Star stalking over with her usual grumpy scowl. Students cleared out of her way like she was a boat cutting through water. Surprisingly, Rarity was right on her heels, wearing an unusual worried expression and apologizing sweetly to the quickly dispersing crowd.
“Evening! Rarity!” Pinkie called to her friends, waving her hooves excitedly, “I was just trying to get Starlight and Vanilla to be friends but they’re both being super rude.”
“Hold on,” Starlight protested, “how in Equestria am I the one being rude? She kicked me in the shin!”
Rarity’s face grew even more worried. “Oh dear! Darling, are you alright?”
“I’m fine,” Starlight admitted, still rubbing her leg, “More pissed off than hurt, honestly.”
While Rarity was fussing over Starlight’s well-being Evening wacked Vanilla on the back of the head.
“Ooow,” Vanilla whined, “what did you do that for?”
“Stop being rude to our hosts,” Evening said with a grumble, “we want them to like us, remember?”
“But they’re so boring,” Vanilla insisted, overexagurating the whine in her voice, “and Starlight sucks! I hate Starlight.”
Starlight opened her mouth to snap something probably rude in reply but Evening beat her to it.
“No, Chrysalis hates her. This is the first time you’ve ever met Starlight.” Evening fixed her fellow clone with a hard stare. “Or do you want to be exactly like that stupid bug?”
Vanilla hesitated at that and, while avoiding eye contact with every pony there, slowly shook her head. “No… she sucks more…”
“Good,” Evening said with a tone of finality, “now apologize.”
Vanilla glanced at Starlight through the side of her eye and said, “Sorry you suck at first impressions.”
Starlight’s teeth ground together so hard Pinkie was afraid they were going to crack. “You’re not making so hot of one yourself.”
“Great. We’re all friends again. Now if you’ll excuse us, we should be on our way,” Evening said, pushing on Vanilla’s shoulder back towards the school. She gave a very fake smile. “Great to meet you Starlight. Oh, and Rarity, have a good time on your trip.”
“Thanks Evening!” Pinkie Pie called as the clones walked away. Evening did not look back at all, which Pinkie thought was a bit rude, and soon the two disappeared into the school. Pinkie turned back to Rarity and Starlight and beamed. “Wasn’t that great? Evening saved the day!”
Starlight gave her a flat look as she hesitantly put weight back on her leg. “Yeah, great. Couldn’t have been better.” She sighed and her shoulders slumped, like all of the built up tension just leaked out of her. “I’m sorry Pinkie, thank you for trying but I just think there’s too much bad blood between us for us to be friends anytime soon.” She paused and looked thoughtful. “Maybe even literally? Their blood might actually be flowing with Hate Starlight energy.”
“Now, darling,” Rarity spoke up, “I agree that they’re a bit… uncouth but Pinkie’s right; you must give them a chance. They’ve had a bad start but they’re learning and that means there will be some bumps in the road. You should know what that’s like.”
Starlight groaned. “I know, I know. Believe me I understand. It’s just harder when they’ve got something against me, personally.”
Rarity gave her a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry, dear. You’ve been trying so hard lately and the pressure just keeps building for you. And it certainly won’t help with me being gone-“
“Gone?” Pinkie interrupted, “Where are you going?”
“Evening did say something about a trip,” Starlight added, “What did she mean?”
Rarity waved her hoof in the air, as if to shake away the pink ponies’ concerned expressions. “Oh, it’s nothing important. My parents take these trips across the country or onto cruises all the time. They’ve gotten it into their heads recently that I’m constantly in ‘mortal danger’ or other such rot and are rather insistent I come along this time.” She bit her lip and looked away guiltily. “And normally I wouldn’t dream of leaving while things are so chaotic and Twilight is also away but… my parents can be quite insistent when they want to be.”
Starlight looked pensive but Pinkie just nodded understandingly. “Of course! Family time is really super important. You shouldn’t miss out on it just for our sake.”
“Yeah,” Starlight agreed, putting a kind of forced, but no less genuine smile on, “Family is important. If you feel like you need to be with them now then you should.” She laughed kind of awkwardly. “I know I’ve ditched on my dad more than a few times but I, uh, regret those decisions.”
Pinkie grabbed Rarity in a side hug. “Don’t you worry about us! We’ll run this ship ship-shape while you’re gone! Oooo, maybe we can get a substitute teacher or something. We’ve never done that before.”
Rarity gently squeezed her back. “Oh, thank you darling. It certainly eases my mind knowing you’ll be alright without me.”
Starlight glanced back over to where Evening and Vanilla disappeared. “I’m sure we’ll survive somehow.”