Halo ODST: Feet First Into Equestria

by DontBeThatGuy


Troopers Know What The Ladies Like

Epsilon Eridanus System

Reach

22 May 2549

Jennings glanced at the altimeter in his pod, watching in disbelief as the numbers span by faster than he could see. The meter sped past 15Km, showing no inclination of slowing. He bounced around nervously in his pod as the temperature rose to uncomfortable levels. He was in charge of the raid they were about to perform, the first of many in the next month. His performance on this would determine whether or not he would pass, fail, or be recycled to the previous class. And he did not want to spend any extra time in this school.

The Cadre controlled a small compound, rectangular compound that sat atop a lone hilltop surrounded by grasslands. Because of this, Jennings ruled a stealthy approach out of the list of options. He eventually decided on a multi-phase plan. He was going to emplace two sniper teams, one to the northwest the other to the southwest of the objective, before anyone else could hit the ground. At the same time, decoy pods would be dropped in the courtyard of the compound. Each of the pods had been rigged with the training claymore mines, each timed so that the door would blow open, at which point the instructors would likely duck to avoid the flying metal. A few seconds later the Cadre would pop back up and fire into the pods to kill the Troopers. Hopefully they came back up, the mines would fire, splattering red paint on the Cadre and freezing their armor.

Then, phase two would begin. Three squads would land, storming the Compound from the North and West. Their objective would be was to secure the outside of the compound. In the third phase, first and second squads provide security on the structure, while third squad would breach the target building within the compound to find the intelligence. A contingent of pelicans would drop from the sky to pick them all up, and exfil back to their main base. To be entirely honest, he hadn’t been authorized the Pelicans, though he had never been told not to use them. Basically, after a couple months of scouting around, he discovered a way into the Pelican bay, and found a couple Troopers who knew how to fly it. The Cadre were always telling him to be innovative, so he was. Better to ask forgiveness than permission.

“Assault element, deploy chutes,” he said tersely into his microphone. Three squads decelerated, letting the sniper teams and the decoys rocket ahead of them. A few seconds later, he could feel the thrusters fire, slowing the pod to a non-lethal level.

“Sniper teams are in position,” the report crackled through his helmet.

“Stand bye,” he said, glancing at his video feed from his drones. The windows were blossoming with red paint as the Cadre opened fire on the closed door from various emplaced MG positions. Jennings grinned within his helmet. He had ‘accidentally’ left plans around, detailing his assault. In these fake plans, he dictated in great detail how an element was going to land on the inside of the compound, working their way to the gate to let the rest of the force inside. As he had hoped, they had set up more defenses than they normally would have facing inside. Ah, the smell of subterfuge in the morning!

The doors of the pods exploded outwards, sending a few ducking behind cover. Immediately, they jumped back up, pouring volleys of fire into the interior of the pods. Jennings depressed the button on the detonator, watching with glee via the camera as quite a few Cadre toppled over with rock-solid armor.

“Engage targets,” he said into his mic. Over his radio, he could hear the loud SR-99 fire at compound.

“Ten seconds!” One of the squad leaders said over the radio. Every man braced in their own respective pods. The jarring impact with the ground rattled every bone in Jennings’ body. The door blew open, Jennings leapt from through the opening, pulling his M7S into his shoulder. Overhead, sniper rounds hissed seeking the already cover-seeking Cadre.

Jennings regrouped with his squad, directing their placement along the north wall. They stacked on the wall about 20 meters from where the door was. The number one trooper in the stack pulled out a spray-on explosive device, covering the wall 10 meters from the door in a thick layer. He stepped back into formation, awaiting the signal.

“First and third squad are in position, over,” came a call on the radio, from the element assaulting from the west. Jennings depressed the second detonator, shredding gaping holes in the solid rock walls. The elements filed in rapidly, splitting off into their own distinctive sectors.

Jennings sped through the brand new entrance, weapon at the ready. He snapped a few rounds off at a Cadre on the wall, who was raining bullets into the lower levels with an MA5B. The frozen soldier toppled off the wall, landing in a heap on by the base of the wall.

By now it was obvious the Cadre were surprised by the sudden, ferocious attack. Normally it wasn’t until the end of the Trooper-led raids when they were beaten, and even then it wasn’t usually this sound of a beating. The Cadre were dropping rapidly, and they were pretty obviously unhappy about it.

Eventually, the pissed off Cadre holed themselves on a small packet of the wall, barricading themselves in, and away from the sniper rounds. From their covered positions, they rained a wall of fire upon the advancing students. A thunderous explosion rocked the compound, coating three of Jennings’ Troopers in red paint. The remainder dove for what cover was available.

“What was that?” Jennings barked over the radio, ducking as a round from the Cadre snapped just overhead.

“Stand bye, we’re trying to get eyes on as to the source!” a squad leader shouted over the gunfire. Another explosion detonated nearby, ‘killing’ another Trooper.

“Oh, shit! Scorpion column on approach!” Two Scorpion tanks were rolling up the road, firing off their main cannon as fast as it could be reloaded. Jennings dropped to his stomach, making a snap decision.

“Raptor Two-Three this is Raptor Two-Seven, over.”

“Go ahead 27.”

“We need you inbound now. Be advised, there are enemy Scorpions firing on our position. Recommend preparing heavy weapons.”

“Roger 27, 23 is inbound hot.” Jennings turned back to his men.

“Two minutes! Backup will be here in two minutes!” Another explosion killed a Trooper.

“Hey Jennings!” Naber shouted at his buddy in the growing racket.

“What?”

“Do you think we’ll last that long?”

“We have to!” Jennings spun, firing off a few rounds which impacted harmlessly on the outside of the barricade. Naber fired again, with similar results.

“How long now?” Jennings glanced at his watch.

“One minute, fifty three seconds!”

“Are you kidding me? We have to get off the wall, the Scorpions will shred us up here!”

“No, we aren’t moving! If we abandon position, the Cadre will have the high ground, and we won’t have any momentum. We have to hold here.”

“This is about to get real intense.”

“Hell yeah.” Jennings fired a quick burst, catching the helmet of Cadre with one round, not killing him but removing him from the fight for a few hours at least.

“Jennings, we’ve got incoming Pelicans!” Naber pointed skyward, noting the delta shaped formation of the four vehicles. The Cadre immediately started cheering, knowing how the Pelicans slaughtered Troopers every time. The Tanks ignored them as they passed overhead, continuing their oppressive fire on the entrenched Troopers.

“Hey Troopers, ya see that shit! Enjoy tasting led, ha ha!”

“Oh darn, if only we had prepared for this!” Jennings shot back sarcastically. Half of the Cadre looked up at the Pelicans, expecting to see red paint pathetically splatter over the side of the bird, in a vain effort for the Troopers to save themselves. Instead, they watched rockets fly out the back, killing their tank column in a matter of seconds.

“Oh shit, open fire, open fire!” Red paint splattered pathetically over the side of the Pelican as the Cadre tried in vain to save themselves. The tail end whipped around, and the gatling guns rained death over the Cadre positions.

The immediate opposition cleared, third squad stacked up on the roof of the target building, laying down explosive in a circular pattern. Jennings gave them a green light, and the earth shook with an earsplitting roar as the debris from the detonation rained down. The squad jumped in, clearing the room with ease. Only thirty seconds later, the squad emerged through the door, having cleared the room without casualties (the Cadre weren’t expecting troopers coming in from above), and with the required intel.

“Everyone onto the Pelicans, let’s move!” Jennings tapped the Troopers on the shoulder as they loaded onto the pelicans, making sure he had every single soldier with him. He motioned to the pilot with his hand, and the flight of took off, stopping to retrieve the snipers en route to their main base of operations.


Four weeks later…


Jennings stood stiffly at attention with his 37 other remaining classmates. Finally receive the coveted ODST tab to wear on his dress uniform, and to serve in combat with the finest soldiers the UNSC could field. He was proud to have finally finished the long, arduous course.

“Ladies and gentlemen, what you have in front of you is the best the UNSC can offer. These soldiers have stood the test, and risen above the challenge,” the speaker read over the loudspeaker as families watched on. To be honest, Jennings tuned out the majority of the speech. In fact, he didn’t listen to any of it. He was just so relieved to be done, and so anxious to move on with his life. Finally the speaker read off a list of names.

“The Honor Graduate, Trooper Jennings. Top rated in combatives, Trooper Naber,” he said, scanning down the list.

“Welcome to the 105th, Helljumpers.” The reply was thunderous.

“Feet First, Sir!”


~ ~ ~ ~ ~


“And that’s how I graduated at the head of my class!” Twilight finished her story, pointing towards various pictures on the mantel. They had been talking for hours about various complexities (or at least to the level the Jennings knew, not necessarily to the level that Twilight wanted), and the day had rapidly faded into night.

“So… you’re an egghead.” Twilight hesitated slightly before making a correction.

“I’m an academic.”

“But still, you love school,” Jennings insisted.

“I love knowledge,” she corrected again, this time a little more gently.

“I don’t know man, I just go crazy staring at numbers and letters all day.” Twilight looked at him askew, abruptly changing subjects.

“ Are you sure you are in the military?”

“Uh, yeah. Pretty da-darn sure,” he abruptly changed his cursing when Twilight gave him a murderous look.

“But you’re so…” Twilight trailed off, looking for the right word.

“I’m so what?”

“Undisciplined.”

“Undisciplined?” he said, grinning. “You think I’m undisciplined?”

“Well, yeah.”

“And what gave you that impression,” he said, almost snorting with laughter.

“Well, your vernacular isn’t exactly high-class. You use colloquial phrases constantly. Your poise is terrible, too! Your clothes are in disarray. And even if they weren’t, they look bulky, cumbersome, and nowhere near the level of our royal guard. And how would you get people to respect you with that mane? You can’t do anything to it, it’s far too short.”

“That’s your criteria for military discipline?”

“Well, yeah.”

“Well then I don’t fit in, in your military. I could kill your military no problem, though.”

“Unlikely.”

“Oh, it’d be easy. Your military, based on your description, loves its appearance. Our military trains us to kill.”

“Oh right. So you go to schools on killing?” Twilight said sarcastically.

“We sure do. And I graduated from the best school.”

“And that is…” Twilight sounded a mix of disbelieving, disgusted, and curious.

“Orbital Drop Shock Trooper school. Approximately 300 of us started, only 38 of us graduated.”

“And how do they teach that? I thought you didn’t like school.” She pantomimed writing on a chalkboard, beginning to
talk in a high-pitched , mocking voice. “And you stab in this part of the body for maximum effect!”

“Well, sort of. Except we usually used knives on corpses, so we could see their full effect.” Twilight blanched at the thought.

“I was joking.”

“I wasn’t.”

“That’s barbaric!”

“So is war! And we train brutally so we can win! Don’t even try to tell me you wouldn’t do the same.”

“Not in a million years! That’s uncivilized!”

“You don’t train like you fight?”

“We do, but we don’t fight like barbarians! We’re civilized!”

“Then your enemies must be civilized.”

“Well, we haven’t had a full-scale military conflict in a while,” she confessed.

“I thought as much.”

“And you have been in full-scale war?”

“We have for the last 25 years.”

“Why haven’t you used the elements of harmony?”

“The what?” Jennings gave her a bizarre look.

“The elements of harmony. You know, character traits of true friendship.”

“Fu- Shi- Dang I need to live in this world for a while. Your world seems so much nicer.”

“You don’t have them?”

“The only element I have known is misery, conflict, and blood. Not exactly friend-making material.”

“Well, haven’t you at least tried to talk to them? Figure out a good middle ground?”

“Lady, they attacked us. All attempt at contact has lead to death and-” The door crashed open as a rainbow colored blur sped through the opening. Surprised by the noise, Jennings dove across the room, bringing his M7S to bear on the new threat.

“Hey Twi I was-whoa! It’s awake!” Rainbow Dash sprang across the room in a single leap, landing, with her nose almost touching the suppressor on the stubby submachine gun in the strangely clad creature’s claws. “What’s that?” Jennings had thought he had seen it all.

“Rainbow.”

“That’s me.”

“With wings.”

“Most pegasi are.”

“A rainbow-colored horse with wing.”

“Technically I’m a pegasus pony, but I’ll let it slide.”

“What the f-”

“Ahem!” Twilight interrupted. “Jennings, meet Rainbow Dash. Dash, Jennings.”

“Hi!” Dash said enthusiastically, sticking out a hoof. Jennings cautiously shook han… shook hoo… exchanged common courtesies with the brilliantly colored pegasus before him.

“Um, hi.” Inter-species diplomacy wasn’t exactly his strong point. Well, that depends on how you define ‘diplomacy.’

“Hey, I was there when your meteor crashed. No, wait! Meteorite!” She grinned triumphantly.

“Oh yeah. The meteor. Right. That thing.” Jennings was still recovering from the shock of a rainbow colored flying horse. Seriously, what the heck.

“Jennings, could you stop pointing your weapon at Rainbow, please?” Twilight asked, her eyes locked on the weapon Jennings was leveling at the athletic pony.

“What? Oh, right. Yeah, sorry about that.” He placed the M7S on the table.

“That was a weapon?” Rainbow commented, suddenly getting angry.

“It’s not any weapon you or I would be familiar with,” Twilight interjected.

“Why the hay was it pointing it at me?”

“Jennings is a ‘he,’ and because you startled him. He’s a soldier. A very…” Twilight paused, trying to think of a good word. “…effective soldier.”

“A soldier, huh?” She immediately punched him in the shoulder. Before the blow even landed, Jennings deflected the blow, grabbing Rainbow and throwing her to the ground at lightning speed. “Ow.”

“Careful Dash, they don’t value the same discipline that our military does. They focus on killing the enemy.”

“Really? Cool! You’d get along great with the great pegasus military leaders.”

“Jennings, could you let Dash up, now?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Hey, Jennings, right?” Dash asked. Jennings nodded. “You should talk to some of the pegasi generals about your military and the training you do. I’m sure they’d like to hear your opinion.”

“Oh. I can do that, I guess.”

“Speaking of meeting people, I need to introduce you to Pinkie Pie. I’m sure she’s got a party planned for you, or something.”

“Shouldn’t I wait until my burns are… huh. The burns are gone,” Jennings said, feeling his neck.

“Well, yeah,” interjected Twilight. “Burns don’t take long to heal. Maybe a day, tops. If you’d broken a bone though, you’d be down for at least a week.”

“One week.”

“Yeah.”

“Where I’m from, it takes at least six.”

“Six weeks?” Dash said aghast.

“Yeah.”

“Man, if I’d been down for six weeks after I broke my wing, I’d be miserable. I thought a week was bad.”

“Apparently not. To me, six is normal.”

“Whatever. We can solve the differences between your world and ours after we get you some cupcakes.”

“Did you say cupcakes?”

“You have cupcakes where you’re from, right?”

“Yeah, we do. I’ve just never had one.” He mentally reviewed the ships he’d been on, and all the military meals he’d been issued, the miscellaneous meat and vegetables scrounged from somewhere. Even as a kid, he’d grown up as a refugee from Harvest, and always had to scrounge for what he could eat. Nothing fancy like a cupcake. He’d watched through glass windows as bakers had made them, but never could afford them himself. Never thought that Earth’s last stand would be how he got his first cupcake.

“You’ve never had one?” Dash said, her jaw dropping.

“Our race has been at war for almost as long as I’ve been alive. My planet was destroyed when I was three, and I’ve been on the move since. I haven’t exactly had time to sit down and eat luxury food. Then I joined the military, and been eating military rations ever since.”

“Oh, wow. That, that sucks. Couldn’t your parents get you some of that?” There was an awkward silence for a few moments.

“My parents were killed in the first attack.”

“Oh.”

“Don’t look so depressed. Plenty have lost more than I have. Let’s go get some cupcakes,” Jennings said, sweeping
his weapons from the counter, and grabbing his helmet.

“Oh, sure!” Dash still felt bad for bringing it up.

“Wait!” cried Twilight. “Don’t do anything rash to him, Dash! I’d prefer to have our first alien visitor intact in the morning!”

“Don’t worry, Twi. Geez, you expect the worst of me,” she said with a sly grin before closing the door. “Alright Jennings. Let’s do some work on Ponyville” Dash strutted off down the nighttime ponyville. “Look, I’m sorry that I have to tell you this, but we aren’t getting cupcakes right now. Those’ll come later. Besides, Pinkie isn’t even at her bakery right now. We’re going to have some fun tonight.”

“Oh?” He said, raising an eyebrow, his helmet still under his arm.

“Oh yeah. You’ll like this place,” she gestured towards a building, with a glowing sign above reading ‘VS’ with subscript ‘the nightclub.’ Blaring bass and pulsing lights accentuated the familiar feeling.

“Twilight will kill you.”

“So don’t say anything.”

“You know how long it’s been since I’ve been to a club?”

“Too long?”

“Yup.”

“Let’s hit it.” Dash walked up confidently to the bouncer. He welcomed her to the VIP line.

“Welcome back, Ms. Dash. Vinyl is backstage if you want to say ‘hi,’ she’s going on in fifteen minutes, so make it brief.”

“Thanks. I’ll make sure to. Oh, he’s with me. And don’t even try to stop him, you wouldn’t be able to.” The bouncer flinched at the insult to his ability, but let the hulking behemoth of a human walk by.

7 colors in your hair
Get your boots on dear 'cause we're going out there
Don't care bout the dress code
Put it on, let's go
Girls go wild 'cause we're going "al fresco"
Ha!
No need to perform
Hooves on our bodies gonna keep our skills warm
We need social reform 'cause we're just so criminal
Linguist subliminal, damages minimal

The bass pounded his ears as he walked through the pulsing lights and dancing horses. This place was so weird, and yet so familiar.

“Hey Vinyl!”

“Dash! What’s up my pony?” A brilliantly white pony with crazy blue hair whirled, giving a fist—er—hoof bump to Rainbow.

“Vinyl, I want you to meet a friend of mine. Jennings, this is Vinyl Scratch.”

“’Sup Vinyl.”

“Not much, Jennings. Man, that’s way too long of a name. Jay, it’s good to meet you.”

“Vinyl Scratch is a peculiar name. Let me guess, you like to DJ.”

“Hay yeah. I DJ all buckin’ night.”

“So, is this your club? I just noticed that the initials match your name.”

“He’s a fast one, isn’t he? It sure is! I do most of my shows here, but I’ll occasionally bring in talent, like livemau5, who’s onstage right now.”

“He’s good.”

“Hay yeah he is! You like club music?” She said, offering him a fist bump.

“When I went to clubs I did.”

“Why’d you stop, man?”

“I went to war. I made music with my weapons from then on.”

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about. Make music in any circumstance. Listen, I’d love to stay and talk, but I have to get onstage! Catch ya later!”

“Later!” No sooner had she left, than Dash was pulling him elsewhere. They emerged onto the floor right as Vinyl took her spot, shouting out into the crowd to get them riled up, immediately launching into another bass-heavy song.

“Where are we going now?”

“The bar!” Dash had to shout to be heard over the reverberating bass. Now that’s what I’m talking about. “Two shots of vodka, put it on my tab!” She shouted at the bartender. Two shot glasses appeared, filled to the brim. Dash handed one to Jennings.

“To new friends!” She said, downing her shot.

“To new friends!” He said slower.

“Another two!” The glasses appeared rapidly. She nodded at him.

“To the friends lost.” He suddenly had a faraway look in his eyes.

“To friends lost,” Dash repeated, more solemnly. She had no way of knowing everything he felt, and never planned on losing all the friends that he had.

“You’re awake? And I didn’t even throw a party!” A loud voice appeared at Jennings’ side.

“Jay, this is Pinkie Pie,” Dash introduced. “Pinkie, Jay.”

“Jay, you’re going to love your party!”

“Hey Pinkie,” Dash interrupted. “Jay’s never had a cupcake before.”

“What? That’s an atrocity! How can you have never had a cupcake before?”

“I’ve been running from death all my life. I haven’t had time for luxuries.”

“Luxuries? Cupcakes are essential! Come with me right now!” Pinkie led the two out the door, making a beeline for her
bakery.


~ ~ ~ ~ ~


“Go with the blessing of the prophets. Lead your element and kill all those in the village.” Those had been Lo’Vadomir’s exact words to the red elite. His blood was riled, he wanted blood. He wanted to prove himself to his superiors and his family. He would bring death upon the heretics. He would show them pain like they had never known before.

“Spread out,” he growled to the Unggoy and Kig-Yar under his command. Dutifully they moved apart, the Kig-Yar igniting their energy shields.

“Heretic!” A Unggoy squealed, leveling a plasma pistol on a passing pony.

“Hold. This one is mine.” The elite covered the open ground between him and the light blue pony in a split second. He grabbed the pony by the scruff of the neck with a crushing grip, raising it to eye level.

“Ow! What did I do?” she proclaimed.

“Pathetic. No fight. I will purge you heretics from existence!” He slid the sizzling blade into the body of the struggling mare.

“Why…” Her struggling ceased. He tossed the lifeless husk to the ground. The elite paused, noting a familiar scent in the air.

“Human.” He saw a single human soldier walking along with two of these other heretics. The man flipped his helmet on leveling a notoriously effective human weapon in his direction. The human dropped the only three Kig-Yar he had with him in a flash, turning his attention next to the grunts.

“Kill the heretics!”



A/N I know for a fact that the next two weeks (ish) I will be unable to post anything, do to the fact that I will be in the front leaning rest repeatedly, then jumping out of helicopters.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlxJtHpVqnE&feature=related

I doubt I will be able to do any writing during that timeframe, but I promise I will as soon as I can. I have some plans as far as where to go. I can’t wait to start writing again, it’ll be a nice break from full muscle failure.

Also, I tried to tone down the swearing in this one. Barring a few bursts of planned vulgarity, this is about the level of profanity that will exist for the rest of the story.