I get home.
It's a small apartment with no heating and little electricity. I cant afford better. I curl up on my aged sofa, head on my arm. I quietly sing to myself, trying to distract my thoughts from today. From everything.
Power was not the main desire
Instead it was the approval, what i wanted was approval aquired.
I've began to fall, there's no light ahead
Darkness found me
And left me on my own.
Like shadows curling round, in the night
I'm broken, won't deny
I may have no future, so I'm told
But here me when say
That put my past behind me
Because my past is not my way.
Tears burn my eyes. I wasn't always like this. I want to be nice but I have noone to teach me how. I'm a monster. No one wants to be friends with a monster. I wrap my arms around my chest. All I do...is fail. My past, it only proves that. Whywhywhy. Why am I me?! OK. Calm down. Breathe. Perfectly calm. I'll be OK. I've always picked myself up before, why not this time? There's always hope...even if things have always been cursed for me....Maybe I should explain...
Flashback-Age; 10
"Wrong! Do it again!" A yellow unicorn with light green hair yells.
"But I'm tired..." I protest.
"Being tired is for losers! Do you want to carry on being a loser for the rest of your life?" she yells.
"No mother." I reply. We're doing magic training. It's gone midnight but mother says I have to get this right.
"Don't look so miserable!" a red unicorn with darker red hair snaps. "You are too cause that emotion in others. That's how you succeed. Not that you will, Sunset Shimmer. You'll never amount to anything."
"B-but Father..." I protest.
"But nothing! Try again!" he yells.
End Flashback
They always pushed me like that, I ended up like them. Insulting to get my way. It hurt me so why did I do it? Have I always been a monster? Ugh. Everyone could do better than me. Freaking Tirek could. I have no potential for goodness, otherwise I wouldn't of turned into my parents. Sure...they wanted to push me to my limits...but it made it hard for me to trust anyone. At least Father was right...I'll never amount to anything.
Flashback-Age; 13.5
I can't do the spell. I strain myself, no luck.
"Sunset, we can't advance until you master this and it's been months." Celestia says to me. "I'm wondering if you have a backup career which isn't entirely magic based." Is she...giving up? Am I that much of a failiure. I run out the room not replying. The bitterness from my parents overspills. I cant stay here, where no one has faith in me..and I know about the portal to another dimension. A fresh start. Just what I need. Noone needs me here, not even Celestia...
End Flashback
Flashback-Age; 17
Twilight pulls me out the crater. I couldn't fight the darkness, all I wanted was to show Celestia my power. Instead I tried to enslave people. FAILIURE. WHY DO I KEEP FAILING EVERYONE?! Escpecially...myself. "Im so sorry," I sob. She hugs me. She tells me her friends will he friends with me...its a lie. Albeit a kind one...
"Oh now you feel bad" Dash snaps. "You didn't feel bad when you tore apart our friendship!" I did that three months ago...For one reason. I was jelous. I've never had any friends..."
End Flashback
And I never will...
The song is basically 'My Past is Not Today' but I changed the words. Was my edit of the song ok?