Sea of Misfits

by M48 Patton


Chapter 21

Storm knew the moment that the shouting started, the plan had failed. Tracking Longhorn as he jumped to his hooves, Storm twitched her leg and let the bolt loose at his head. Longhorn somehow saw the bolt coming and used his arm to block it.
Not waiting for Longhorn to reach her, Storm scrambled out the back of the tent and took off towards where she left her crew. Throwing stealth out the window, she flew past two unsuspecting pirates and neatly knocked one into the other before they noticed her. Another one of Longhorn's crew was unfortunate enough to turn around in time to actually see Storm's hoof connect with his muzzle shortly before he crumpled to the ground.
Four more oblivious ponies and one diamond dog were similarly dispatched with well placed blows to parts of the cranial region. However, due to the diamond dog's naturally hard head, the sound of Storm's hoof connecting with the skull made an unusually loud thunk that was loud enough to be heard over the battle taking place on the far side of the cave.
A griffon turned around and squawked in surprise, attracting the attention of several other pirates. They instantly rushed her, trying to tackle her to the ground.
Storm took down each pirate as soon as each one was in range; diving under the griffon on her back and kicking him into a pegasus before using an earth pony's own momentum against him to throw him onto a unicorn caster.
With a huge roar, a minotaur made himself known to Storm by bringing a huge hammer down right where Storm had been moments ago. It wasn't Longhorn, but the minotaur's sheer strength guaranteed he would be a tough fight.
Twisting around the legs of the minotar, Storm deftly evaded a unicorn's spell and launched herself upwards to land on the minotaur's head. Two solid hits to both of the minotaur's ears promptly caused the minotaur to drop his hammer and sent him into a rage as his hearing was impaired, permanently most likely.
Dodging the minotaur's hands as he tried to grab her, Storm flipped off his head and landed on top of a passing pegasus, breaking his wing in the process. Landing on the ground, Storm heaved on the gigantic hammer that the minotaur dropped it with both forelegs, using her entire body as leverage. The head of the hammer left the ground and sped through the air to connect with the minotaur's stomach. He was thrown backwards from the force of the blow and fell, unable to rise due to the massive pain he felt.
Storm let the hammer go and ignored it as it flew through the air and impacted a diamond dog's face, instead choosing to focus on the next pirate in line. However, much to Storm's surprise, the unicorn caster closest to her was ignoring her, instead looking at the suspended cage.
Too late did Storm realize what was about to happen as the unicorn unleashed a fire spell directly at the rope that held the cage in the air. Stomping on the unicorn, she could only watch in horror as the spell impacted the rope, sending five mares and one wendigo plunging towards the ground.


Henry smashed at the stubborn iron again and again, but it held firm even when frozen.
“Stan' back!” The orange mare said, turning to buck the area where Henry had been hammering.
The cage suddenly shook violently, and it wasn't from the orange mare's kick. Henry looked up and saw what was left of the rope quickly burning away. The final few strands holding the rope together began to snap one after the other, and in less than a moment, the cage would fall.
He acted quickly, dropping down to the very bottom edge of the cage so that he was hanging underneath it. From there he began to conjure ice, lots of it.
The rope snapped and the cage began to fall, but Henry ignored it and continued to make as much ice as he could. Soon, his entire body was encase in ice that constantly expanded as he made more and more.
The wendigo had formed a solid block of ice on the underside of the cage at least five feet in diameter when the cage hit the ground. Henry felt the ice crack around him as the cage landed on top of his improvised shell. The iron bars smashed their way through the ice, snapped and twisted into sharpened pieces of metal that sheared away Henry's frozen shield and pierced his toughened hide.
He screamed in agony as the rest of the cage fell on top of him, pinning him to the ground. Craning his head around, he tried to analyze his situation. There were three iron bars poking out of his chest, two of his legs were bent at impossible angles, and there was a thousand pound cage currently crushing him into solid rock.
Well, today certainly wasn't shaping up the way he expected.


Twilight made a mad dash to where the cage had fallen, blasting anything unfortunate enough to get in her way. A now undisguised Drip and Storm's crew member followed closely behind, attacking any of Longhorn's crew that tried to ambush the princess.
Several of Storm's crewmembers as well as Woody the timberwolf had already reached the cage and were trying to pry open the bars as well as fend off any attackers. Twilight arrived and after unleashing a blast wave that sent anything unfriendly flying away, took charge.
“Stand back!” She ordered, using her magic to rip the cage apart.
“Twilight! Don't!” Applejack yelled as the metal began to split.
Twilight paused and took a closer look into the cage. Applejack was relatively unhurt, but Rainbow Dash was in the corner with a broken wing being tended to by Rarity who had a slight limp, and Fluttershy was near the back of the cage hovering over a white creature that was trapped underneath the bars.
“Careful Twi.” Applejack cautioned. “Poor ol' Henry here done saved us when he caught the cage, but Ah think he may be near death's door if'n we don't do something fast!”
Twilight nodded, rather stunned at the sight of Henry. Shaking herself free of her stupor, the young alicorn carefully cut away a section for her friends to exit the cage through. She then removed Rarity's inhibitor ring and dispelled the trap.
“Alright, I'm going to lift the cage off of him, but I need to concentrate, or else I might accidentally do more damage.” Twilight explained once her friends were out. “Rarity, I'll need a shield, Applejack, you keep those pirates off of me.”
Rarity nodded and began to cast a shield, albeit a rather weak shield, but a shield nonetheless. Applejack was about to join in with Storm's crew and start kicking pirate flank when a tornado of dark blue fur and feathers swept in, batting and crushing any pirate in its way.
Storm Stalker landed by Twilight's side, breathing heavily and cut up in so many places that Twilight wasn't too sure how she was still alive.
“Princess.” Storm panted. “Get 'Enry an' yew're friends out o' here. Me an' me crew'll cover yew.”
Twilight was stunned at Storm's condition.
“Stalker, are you crazy?” She accused. “We need to get you out of here! You're-”
“PRINCESS! GET OUT O' HERE!” Storm screamed before using the nearest one of her crew as a springboard to launch herself into the battle.
The crewmember turned to Twilight with panic in his eyes.
“Please Princess!” He pleaded. “Ye have ta leave! She'll keep fightin' 'til she knows your safe!”
Twilight stared at the blur that was the pirate known as Storm Stalker, then turned back to look at the crushed white figure of Henry.
She set her jaw. “Okay, just give me a minute.”
Carefully pulling the cage apart piece by piece, Twilight began to extract the battered and broken pirate, hoping that it wasn't too late for anypony else on the crew.


Longhorn stomped his way forward, his eyes never leaving the pegasus mare that seemed to be everywhere at once. One moment she was on top of a diamond dog, beating it into submission, the next she was twisting in midair and knocking his griffons out of the fight.
The minotaur smiled though, the small amount of intruders that Storm had brought with her would easily be overwhelmed by Longhorn's much larger crew of cutthroats, no matter how many Storm Stalker managed to take down.
He noticed that the Elements of Harmony were making their way towards the tunnel entrance with a large white pony held in the princess's magic. No matter, as soon as he had dealt with Storm and the rest of them, he would find some way to capture the Elements again. Perhaps another hostage situation? It seemed as though Storm Stalker and the princess knew each other.
His grin grew, Storm would make an excellent hostage. After he broke every last bone in her body.
“STORM STALKER!” He bellowed, his voice carrying above the melee.
She didn't even acknowledge him. That was fine, Longhorn knew exactly how to get her attention.
By now, the intruders were clustered in a semi-circle around the entrance to the cave, slowly retreating. However, they would not break their formation no matter how hard Longhorn's crew attacked them, not allowing themselves to be routed and overwhelmed.
Longhorn braced himself and lowered his head while unsheathing his scimitars. With a roar, he charged forward, bulling aside his own crew until he reached the line of battle. Smashing through the intruders, he turned and swung his blades in a graceful arc towards the neck of the nearest enemy, a griffon. Well, maybe not a griffon, something looked a bit off. Didn't really matter, in a moment it would be dead.
Steel rang on steel, and Longhorn's blow was stopped short. Storm Stalker had moved so fast that Longhorn hadn't even seen her coming in, but here she was; holding the entire strength of a legendary minotaur up. She was balanced on her rear hooves and arced protectively over the griffon thing, using her crossbow that was mounted on her right foreleg as a shield and using her left foreleg to brace her right.
She was looking right at him through bloody and fearful eyes, and that's probably why she didn't see his hoof coming up to her stomach. The pegasus mare was thrown backwards, stunned but still fighting; twisting herself and flaring her wings to catch her unexpected trip before arcing over Longhorn's head to attack him from behind, but he was expecting this.
Normally, he would have countered by spinning to his left with his scimitar outstretched to force his opponent away from his vulnerable back and then finished with a downward swing with the sword in his right hand, however it was this very move that cost him his pride when facing Storm before. She had dodge his initial swing and slipped under his downward stroke before finishing him off.
Instead, Longhorn brought his left sword around as before, but dropped his right sword and reached out to where he expected the mare to be. He was rewarded with the feeling of her mane in his fingers.
Grabbing onto the hair, he ripped her away from him before she had a chance to buck him in the stomach and threw her against the rock wall. She tried to catch herself, but she was to close and slammed into it before she could react.
Longhorn was on her in an instant, his hand closing around her throat and the tip of his scimitar an inch from her eye.
“Hello Storm.” He growled. “Did you miss me?”
Her response was to spit in his face and feebly kick at his arm.
Longhorn ignored the insult and chanced a glance at his surroundings. Thanks to his earlier action, his crew had subdued or trapped most of the intruders, either holding them at bay with their weapons or beating them down.
He let out a chuckle.
“It seems as though I've won again.” Longhorn smiled.
“Yew ain' done nothin'!” The pegasus sneered. “The Elements are safely away an' the 'Questrian fleet'll be here by morn!”
“Oh really?” Longhorn asked. “They would abandon you to a pirate who has no misgivings about murdering all your crew and then nailing you to the mast of my ship?”
Storm glared at him with unrestrained hate in her eyes.
“Yew'll never get away wit' this!” She hissed.
Longhorn leaned in, his sword edging closer to Storm's head.
“I already have.” He whispered.
“Captain!” One of Longhorn's crew called out. “Above!”
Longhorn turned his head slightly to see a yellow pegasus with a tricorn hat diving on him from the darkness above, sword outstretched. With a twang, the griffon that had called out the warning fired a crossbow at the pegasus.
The newcomer let out a scream before tumbling to the ground in a bundle of fur and feathers, impacting the rock with an audible thud.
Longhorn looked at the fallen pegasus and laughed.
“Was that the best you could do Storm?” He taunted while turning back to face her. “One worthless-”
“CAPTAIN!” Storm shrieked in a mixture of fear and anger.
Longhorn suddenly felt something snap in his arm as the dark blue mare was abruptly free from his grasp. He roared in pain, but it was drowned out by the cry of the intruders. Their scream was beyond anger or fear, it was a feral scream of pure rage that was echoed in their sudden attack.
Like animals driven insane, those that were penned in by blades fought their way free regardless of the wounds they received in the process, while those that were trapped bodily by the crew gained an unnatural strength as they rose to their hooves, sending any creature in their way flying.
And Storm Stalker was the most insane of them all. If she had been a tornado before, now she was a full on hurricane, punching, biting and gouging anything that tried to approach the yellow pegasus lying on the ground.
Longhorn let go of his broken arm and let it hang uselessly, instead picking up his scimitar and advancing towards Storm Stalker. No more games, no more elaborate plans, he was going to kill that mare once and for all. She had made a fool of him not once, not twice but three times; she had disgraced him in front of his father, she had somehow outwitted an entire Equestrian fleet, and now she had broken his arm in full view of his crew. She would pay: She would die.
Longhorn's fixation on Storm Stalker blinded him to the sight of one of Storm's unicorns jumping in front of him with a charged horn. Before the minotaur even knew what was happening, a magical fireball burst into his face, igniting his fur.
Dropping his blade and clutching at the burns, Longhorn fell to his knees and screamed as his skin was forever changed by fire. When he finally was able to open his eyes, the battle had ceased.
A good half of his crew were lying on the ground, groaning or unconscious, while the other half had sustained injuries of various degrees. Turning, he saw the last of the intruders running into the tunnel and to freedom.
“AFTER THEM!” He screamed, struggling to his hooves. “KILL THEM ALL!”
Reluctantly, his crew followed him into the tunnel, ready for one final battle.


Sun Flowers sat in the forward cannon box of the Marblehead, slowly turning the cranks to turn the turret and adjust for the rise and fall of the ship. Poisoned Beaker sat near her, watching her work.
“Are you sure you know what you're doing?” She asked for the fifth time that night.
Sun Flowers fixed her with a deadly glare. “For the last time yes! Now will you let me concentrate?”
Beaker waited for a moment watching Sun look through the small eyepiece before speaking again.
“Wasn't the captain supposed to stay on the ship?” She asked.
Sun groaned in frustration. “Yes. Now be quiet, something's happening onshore.”
“What's going on?”
“I'm not sure.” Sun explained. “I count six, maybe seven ponies just joined Night Watch and Dusk Maiden at the boat. I think it's the Elements of Harmony, but—Oh no.”
“What is it?” Beaker asked impatiently.
“Cover your ears!” Sun ordered.
“What?”
“FIRING!”
A gigantic boom shook the cannon box, leaving a stunned Poisoned Beaker on the floor. She coughed as smoke filled her lungs and looked up dazedly at Sun Flowers. The former show mare didn't even acknowledge her, but instead was concentrated on the sight of the her work.
“I hope I didn't miss.” She said with worry.


Twilight carefully laid Henry into the boat, making sure to keep her magic covering his wounds. It had taken some time to navigate their way out of the caves, but they had finally reached the surface where Dusk Maiden was tending to her brother.
As soon as she put Henry in the boat, there was a commotion from the cave entrance and moments later Storm and her crew came pouring out of the cave and towards the boat. The pirates began jumping into the boat or simply jumping into the water alongside the boat.
“Princess!” Storm panted as she ran up to Twilight. “Longhorn an' 'is gang are righ' behind us! Can yew put shield o'er the cave entrance?”
Twilight nodded. “I can hold them for a little while, but I'm not sure how long. My magic is almost drained from healing Henry.”
“Yew 'ave to-” Storm started, but was interrupted by a loud boom from a dark shape in the distance.
“Look out!” Somepony called as a pair of fireballs streaked overhead and slammed into the volcano just above the cave entrance. A massive explosion shook the ground and a wave of hot air blasted everypony off their hooves. With a spray of rock and dust, the cave entrance collapsed, sealing the tunnel more effectively than any shield spell.
Everypony got to their hooves, staring at the sight of the giant craters that had only just been formed.
“Well.” Storm finally spoke. “Tha' works too.”
Big Sail, his coat covered in cuts and bruises, turned to the crew. “Come on! We need to get our injured back to the ship!”
His words instantly roused the crew to action as they began to put those who were the most severely injured into the boat. Twilight helped Zabramn into the boat, the zebra was missing his left ear and had a large gash in his right hind leg. Once she finished with him, she turned to held the next pony in line, but was stunned to see Storm Stalker and Big Sail standing there holding the limp form of Trade Breaker between them.
Storm Stalker, although she was cut in more places than Twilight could count and there was a crossbow bolt in her shoulder, had only one worry, and that was the stallion currently hanging from her back.
“Princess, the fool got 'imself shot, can yew help 'im?” Storm pleaded.
Twilight nodded, taking Trade Breaker in her magic and gently lifting him into the air. With careful precision, she felt through his body with her magic and found several cracked ribs as well as a broken wing.
“It's nothing life threatening.” She explained. “But I need to get him back to the ship and put some splints over the broken parts immediately.”
Turning to the relieved mare, Twilight looked her over.
“As for you, Miss Stalker, you need immediate medical attention. I have no idea as to how you're still standing, but the injuries you've sustained are far more serious.”
Storm Stalker leaned on Big Sail as he helped her into the boat.
“Tend ta the cap'n firs'. I've sur'vived worse.” She said, letting herself fall to the bottom of the boat.
Twilight frowned and tried to say something else, but she was suddenly alone on the beach.
“Ya comin' Princess?” She heard Culinary call as the boat began to make its way out into the water.
The alicorn leaped into the air and sailed alongside the longboat as the least injured crew rowed it out to the Marblehead. She tried to grab the prow of the boat with her magic to help move it along, but the even longboat resisted any attempts she made at using magic.
“Miss Stalker! It's the Bloodhound!” Came the frightened warning.
Twilight looked into the night and sure enough, the darkened outline of the pirate ship loomed in the distance, growing closer.
“She's 'eadin' righ' fer da Marblehead!” Culinary yelled.
“Stand by for boarding action!” Big Sail ordered.
Twilight dove ahead. “I'll go stall them!”
She pumped her wings as hard as she could, streaking towards the dark ship with a glowing horn. Although her magic was drained from the massive amount of healing she had performed earlier, Twilight could still perform some basic combat spells to deal with whatever came at her.
“Halt!” She yelled, amplifying her voice. “Or else I will sink your ship!”
It was an empty threat, at most Twilight could do were stun spells at the moment, but the pirates didn't need to know that. However, it seemed as though the pirates would not be deterred as the Bloodhound continued to race towards the Marblehead.
“I said stop!” She yelled, flying a bit closer to the ship.
“Princess!” Culinary Beak called as he struggled to catch up with her. “Hol' on! Ah t'ink dere's somet'in' wrong!”
Twilight turned back to face him. “What do you mean?”
“Loo' at 'er sails!” Culinary said breathlessly as he drew up alongside of her. “Dey ain't down. An' listen.”
The purple alicorn followed his advice and scanned the ship. The sails were furled, and there was no movement on the deck. Additionally, she could hear a faint but familiar call for help.
“Is that-” She began.
“Four Eyes!” The hippogriff finished, tucking in his wings and diving for the deck.
Twilight followed close behind, landing on the deck beside him.
“Four Eyes! Where arrr ya?” Culinary shouted.
“Culinary! Is that you?” Came the cry from the bow of the ship. “Help!”
Twilight and Culinary rushed to the bow and looked over to find the diminutive seapony hanging from the anchor chain for dear life.
“Four Eyes! Wha' arr ya doin' down 'dere!” Culinary called as he climbed over the bow, careful of the spray that threatened to knock him into the water.
“Culinary!” Four Eyes sobbed. “Thank goodness it's you! I thought that the pirates were going to find me! I wasn't expecting the Bloodhound to come loose and it hit my head! And I lost my glasses! I was just able to grab onto this, but I've been too scared to move!”
The hippogriff grabbed the seapony by the scruff of his neck and hauled him upwards.
“Ya daft fish, yer lucky we foun' ya instead o' Longhorn.” Culinary said as he hauled Four Eyes onto the deck.
Four Eyes looked around blindly. “But-but, you're here, so did the plan work?”
Culinary looked at Twilight, then back at Four Eyes. “Aye, it 'ad a few kinks, bu' it all worked ou' in the end.”