you!""Chrysalis..." Began Luna as she breathed loudly. "I think it's better you take a seat and keep quiet for the rest of the day."
Said Bug Queen felt more insulted than anything about Luna's rather...genuine warning. "A queen does not take orders from anyone but herself." She replied with a proud voice.
Luna grumbled loudly, at the very brink of insanity. "Let me rephrase that for you: Get the hell out of my life!" She yelled in Chrysalis' face who now realized the severity of the situation she was in.
With an awkward, false smile, Chrysalis made a few, small side steps towards her desk. "Yes. Yes, that...does sound like a good idea, actually. The queen happily agrees, hehe."
Just when Luna thought she could have a short break and have herself calm down, the next nuisance was just around the corner.
Or in this case, right behind her.
"My, my, Lulu. Thousands of years old yet still unable to control your anger." Discord said to her, his arms folded behind his back.
Luna grumbled as she heard him call her Lulu, she simply hated that nickname. "For the tenth time, Discord, stop calling me that! You know I hate that name!" Luna barked at him.
Discord chuckled at her reply, snapping his fingers and reappearing next to Luna. "Of course I know you hate the name." Discord said, resting his right arm on Luna's head, "And that is exactly why I'm using it, dear."
Luna could only give out another annoyed grumble as the Draconequus next to her chuckled. "And you're just as much of a nuisance as you were a thousand years ago, Discord." Luna barked at him.
"Oh, why thank you, dear." Discord replied with a smile. "Or should I say...deer?" His left arm rose, yet just before he was able to snap his claws...
"Do it and I'll have you lick the restrooms clean for a thousand years." Luna told him with a grim and serious expression.
Discord froze for a moment as he reconsidered his options. Licking the toilets for a thousand years and seeing Luna as a deer...
Or not...
Hmmmm....
"Fiiine." Discord replied insulted. "What a spoilsport..." He grumbled quietly.
"What was that?" Luna asked Discord after hearing his grumbling.
"Oh I said you look wonderful today, that is all." Discord replied with a fake smile.
Luna looked and stared at him, making Discord increasingly uncomfortable. Luckily for Discord though, someone else came to save him.
"So." Began Sombra as he stood next to Luna. "Maybe now it is time to re-negotiate the whole crystal empire thing."
Luna's heartbeat ascelerated simply by hearing Sombra's voice. "Sombra..." She started, though Sombra was quick to cut her off.
"Yes, yes, I know. We've had our differences and all that. But, seeing as how we both are noble, civilized rulers, I believe we should be able to look past such actions." He too gave Luna a smile, though his looked more genuine than fake. Making Luna concerned that Sombra really was a retard, and not just playing dumb.
"For the last time-"
"Now, I know we have not found any common ground in this matter just yet, but I am quite fond of seeing how we could both form a fair deal."
"Sombra." Luna said.
"But before-"
"Sombra." Luna said again, louder this time.
"We simply must-"
"Sombra!" Luna yelled, finally getting him to shut up. "I appreciate your optimism about this matter, I really do."
Sombra smiled more and was about to reply to her statement. "But." Luna interrupted Sombra just as he was about to say something. "Despite all this, I only have one thing to say to you."
Sombra lost his smile and gulped. "A-and that would be?" He asked timidly.
"Get. Lost." She yelled at him once again.
Sombra had turned from optimistic and happy to...well...something many would not expect of him.
Yeah, well, he curled himself up on the ground and cried. It was sort of entertaining the first few seconds, though it quickly became boring and annoying for many in the audience.
"Fantastic job, second hand princess." Mocked Trixie as she looked at the crying Sombra on the ground. "Now we've got to deal with yet another cry baby in here."
"I assume the other one is you?" Said Starlight with a giggle.
"I was about to say it would be you, but I don't think butt-touchers can be cry babies." Replied Trixie in the same mocking voice as before.
"-Said the unskilled magician. I guess real magic is only something for grown ups after all."
The two met face to face and grumbled loudly, attracting everyone's attention, even that of Sombra who temporarily stopped whining.
"Quit it, you two." Interrupted Princess Luna, trying to finally bring order back to this mess of a meeting.
"I must agree." Said Discord, popping up next to Luna. "Usually I would be all for conflict and insults, but it's simply no fun if two children ramble about who is more miserable."
Trixie and Starlight were not amused at all.
"Oh, so what gives you the right to call us that?" Asked Trixie towards Discord.
"Yeah! You're no better than us!" Said Starlight, reinforcing Trixie's statement.
Discord held his belly as he burst out in laughter. Fairly literally, actually, seeing as how he exploded in a burst of confetti. Surely enough though, he reappeared in front of the two insulted mares just a few seconds later.
"Phew. That was a good one." Discord said, still in laughter, as he wiped away a last tear of laughter. He looked down onto Starlight and Trixie and spotted their serious looks. "Oh wait, you're serious?"
The two grumbled at him as their eyes narrowed.
"Well you see, unlike you, I am a god. I can do anything, I am the god of chaos, spirit of disharmony. I have the ability to rip a hole in the very fabric of reality, to travel between dimensions and travel in time." Discord said out loud with proud voice as he praised himself.
"While you two..." He said, taking a knee in front of Trixie. "Yes, well, it's a rather pathetic display, really." He said, snapping his claws and swapping Trixie's hat with a rabbit.
Trixie screamed as the rabbit on her head bit her in the left ear. She started running about, still screaming, until Discord decided he had enough.
Another snap and the rabbit on Trixie's head disappeared, much to her relief.
"Lulu, dear, I thought this was a meeting for villains? What are these children doing here?" He asked, still eyeing Trixie who breathed heavily after her marathon through the room.
Starlight jumped behind Discord and yelled: "Call us children and-"
"And?" Discord interrupted, not bothering to turn around. "You should go home, child. Do your homework and get ready for bed. It's getting quite late." Discord's voice was filled with no shame, only with pure joy. Truly, he enjoyed mocking them as much as one possibly could.
"Hey! Where's my hat!" Complained Trixie.
"Oh, my bad. Hat, coming right up." Said Discord in a giggly voice. He snapped his fingers and a hat appeared on Trixie's head. Though...it wasn't exactly what she had wished for.
"A Dunce hat!?" Trixie bursted out. Discord fell on his back in laughter at seeing her face in reaction to the new cosmetic item on her head. For a moment it seemed like Discord was going to suffocate as loud coughs interrupted his laughter.
Man, that would be a funny way to die. Literally. I mean, imagine. 'Here lies Discord. He died as he lived: Laughing his butt off.'
Oh, yes, right. Moving on.
After about a minute or so, Discord finally managed to calm himself. Well, as calm as Discord can be, of course.
"Right....right..." Discord began, still trying to calm down. "Oh dear, that one really got the better of me."
"...What?" He asked himself as he looked around, seeing how everyone stared at him with an annoyed look. "That was funny! You know it, I know it, even the damn reader knows it!"
Once again, he looked around, though this time the others in the roomed looked more confused than annoyed.
"Readers?" Asked Ember curiously.
Discord snapped his claws, making a thunder cloud appear above him.
"Ahem...Foooools!" He yelled, as a thunderbolt shot out behind him. "Right, that's that then." He said, back in his normal voice, making the cloud above him disappear.
"Discord, I must ask you to behave appropriately." Said Luna to him in a demanding voice.
"Oh, you're saying I need to bully these dwarfs even more? Hm, I thought they would have had enough for now but if the princess says-"
"Discord!" Luna interrupted.
"I'm howling at the moon." Discord sang in reply.
"What?" Luna asked in surprise.
"Oh, nothing. I forgot I'm the only one in the show that is self-aware."
".....What?" Luna asked again, even more confused this time.
"Forget about it. I didn't want to talk to you peasants anyway." Discord lifted his right arm, snapping his claws once more. From one moment to the other, he suddenly wore a black suit, a monocle, wore a top hat and held a golden walking stick in his left hand.
"Now, if you would excuse me," He said, stroking his white beard, "I have more important business to attend to. Good day." The now fancy-looking Draconequus tipped his hat and turned around, slowly making his way towards the exit.
As he came up to the closed door and reached for the door handle, something rather...unpleasant and unexpected happened.
"Luna!" Yelled Celestia as she kicked open the door, unintentionally hitting Discord with said door. The previously noble-looking Discord now laid on the ground in front of Celestia who looked at him in surprise
"Discord? What are you doing down there?" She asked him, seemingly unknowing that she had kicked a door in his face.
Discord looked up to her, snorting at her and saying: " you!"