Just a sonic fan and a friendship is magic fan who wants to make fun stories!
After the defeat of Nightmare Rarity and the nightmare force purged for good, and Twilight's coronation into being the princess of friendship, Everypony believes that the days of Nightmares are over...but what happens when Rarity transforms back into her Nightmare form? Can Spike help her control her new form and can old bonds be fixed between him and Twilight?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well...didn't Fluttershy birdnap the royal phoenix? Applejack caused a stampede of bunnies and got half the town sick on toxic pastries. Pinkie Pie + mirror pool = 'nuff said. Let's not forget the Smarty Pants incident. Pinkie also made Luna look bad during Nightmare Night by stirring the ponies into a frenzy. Can't remember one off the top of my head for Rainbow but I'm sure there is one somewhere.
11903233
I'm talking about going full on villain mode, like casing destruction, almost Conquering the world, stuff like that. Like discord and king Sombra levels of villains. Not being a Nuisance.
I really liked it. However their are plenty of spelling errors and plenty instances of i instead of I. Also instances of some names not being written with proper nouns formatting. I would suggest to fix these errors before submitting another chapter. Because with some polishing here and there, I believe your story will shine here, please do take your time with this story. Overall, I do like your story.
11903566
Thanks! I'll work on spell checking them. Thanks for the feedback!
Whats gonna happen next?
11904490
Funny you mentioned that. I'm working on the next chapter now.
11904517
Cool
Colt?
Don't you mean cult?
11904633
Didn't know if it was a o or a u.
11904636
Ok
11904639
What did you think of the idea of Rarity being descend from a cuit?
11904651
Kind of unexpected
11904667
Yeah. I figured that if I was gonna do this, I'm gonna go all out and have Rarity be the raven of friendship is magic. You know without the whole emo persona.
11904675
Cool
11904675
You planning on having Rarity steal Twilight's voice too? I'm sure you know Tara Strong voiced both Twilight and Raven so I was wondering.
Anyway, I feel uncertain about the Raven concept in the story since Go kinda ruined her for me, though the non-Go movies have improved how I feel about her. It's still a good story overall.
11905165
The whole point was to keep Rarity's personally but make her, but make her just as skilled in using dark magic as raven. Also I'm keeping Rarity as far away from teen titans go as possible. I hate that show.
11903587
Your welcome. I'm pretty sure you can edit first chapter to fix any minor issues.
So, we have Twilight who is being kept in the dark about a big secret that most of her friends have been keeping from her, Rarity with more than one. I wonder if you have something important planned for Pinkie as well.
11907745
You'll have to wait and see.
The more I read about that cult and the description of what kind of magic they were ressearching, it reminds me more of the Inspiration Manifestation book that at this point in time is still in The Castle Of The Royal Sisters in the Everfree Forest.
Also along with some spelling errors in some words from time to time, you've keep doing the same mistake regarding the GAUGE machine ever since is been brought up two chapters ago, is not gadge as you wrote it.
I recomed you to read carefully and with calm your chapter before publishing it though.
Otherwise, Great Job with this, I hope to see more of this story as soon as you can
11908365
Ohhhhh that's how you spell it. Thanks man. And I'm working on the next chapter now!
11908385
Cool! Work carefully on it, you are in no rush, and make sure to correct the issues with the spelling previously pointed out and you're golden!
Oh, I know where this is going. It's going to be one of those stories. Welp, 3 down and 3 to go. Let's just hope that Twilight isn't too sympathetic to Celestia's beliefs lest some heavy drama goes down when she finds out.
11909626
I'll say this nowthere's no relationship drama here while i did intend to include all six of them to be Spike's mare friends. The lore comes first.
11909632
I only mentioned that because it's well known how close Twilight is to Celestia in most stories and given what you said about what Celestia did it left open the possibility of her instilling the fear of dark magic into Twilight.
11909647
We'll just have to see.
Sorry way too ooc for this
11910561
Well it is a parallel universe after all so things will be different. Plus I'm trying to put a dbz spin with the fight scenes.
11910565
alt but on point till here. sorry it turned me off to this story.
11910682
Well it's not for everyone. And I understand.