Su Bin Bao had gone to Beijing to meet the two top men of the American space program, leaving his backup to translate on behalf of the American launch director. Yang Jusheng had known the job was difficult, after shadowing his boss and the Yankee for almost two weeks.
If he’d known how bad it was going to be, though, he would have requested to re-enlist in the People's Liberation Army and get stationed in Xinjiang. It would be less stressful chasing drug smugglers and secessionists in the far western mountains and desert than preventing his co-workers from murdering the loud, tactless American.
“Tell this unlettered dog whelp to leave my people alone!” the vehicle assembly supervisor was shouting at him, pointing at the American in question. “We don’t need some white-bread jerk hovering over our shoulders while we’re trying to do delicate work on heavy machinery!”
Meanwhile, in an entirely different language, Mitch Henderson was shouting, “Tell this lazy bastard to get his crew into gear! This ship has to launch in four days, and we haven’t even begun on final inspections! Why the hell isn’t Sleipnir 5 mounted yet?”
“And if you can pound anything at all into that pig head on that American hog,” the supervisor continued, “try to get him to learn that just because we don’t speak English doesn’t mean we haven’t learned any! And my people know very well when they’re being insulted!”
“And tell him I’m not interested in excuses!” Henderson continued. “There are eleven people up there for whom excuses aren’t going to do any good!”
“We’re moving as fast as we can!” the supervisor continued. “But we’re not going to rush things and risk what happened with Sleipnir 1!”
“WHAT did he say about Sleipnir 1?” Henderson snarled.
Jusheng had had enough for a moment. He held up both hands, palms out, to silence the two older men. “Mister Henderson, I will get a full report on current conditions from the supervisor so I can translate it for you. While I am doing that, I will express your concerns to him. In the meantime, we have prepared fresh coffee in the break room. Perhaps you would like some while you wait?”
After a few moments made it clear that Jusheng wasn’t going to say a word to the supervisor until Henderson left earshot, the American growled, “Four days to launch. Remember that!” Having made his point, he stalked off.
“Boy, I don’t think I can take much more of him,” the supervisor said quietly.
“He is anxious,” Jusheng said. “For us the aliens on Mars are a wonderful thing, a treasure to be rescued from the flood. But for him there are six co-workers- perhaps friends-“
“Does such a man as that know what a friend is?” the supervisor snorted. “How would he keep one long enough to find out?”
“He thinks they are his friends, anyway,” Jusheng said diplomatically. “He knows them personally. Their lives are at stake. He wants them to be saved.”
“It would go much faster if he would restrict himself to assisting when we need his knowledge!” the supervisor said. “I’ve considered denouncing him as an American spy, except he’s obviously not trying to steal our knowledge. He keeps trying to fix it instead. If anything, he’d be a double agent!”
“Does he know what he’s talking about?” Jusheng asked.
“Most of the time, yes,” the supervisor said. “The problem is that he won’t give us credit for knowing what we are talking about- or doing! And every time one of my workers sets down a tool and wipes his face, he’s there, shouting at him, calling him lazy-“
“Sir, please consider,” Jusheng said, trying to derail this rant before it could build up momentum. “Consider that, say, three of our taikonauts were stranded in a capsule in orbit, unable to re-enter. Only a miracle could save them from slow, agonizing death. What would you do to save them?”
“If it would help? I would skin myself alive and dance around the gate of the Forbidden City,” the supervisor said. “I’d climb to the top of the assembly gantry and jump off if it would help. I would do anything. And I understand he’s the same way, boy.” He pointed a finger at the door to the break room and growled, “But I’d be a lot more polite than that pocket-turtle!”
“He is from a different culture,” Jusheng said. “A culture where the politeness you and I take for granted is considered the mark of a weakling.”
“No, he’s just a dick,” the supervisor said bluntly.
“Perhaps.” Jusheng wasn’t like Su Bin Bao. He had a limit to his diplomacy. “But we aren’t, sir.”
“Mm,” the supervisor said, nodding. “Please offer my apologies for… well, find something to apologize for besides my calling him a dick.”
“Yes, sir,” Jusheng said. “How is the assembly proceeding?”
“Couldn’t be better, aside from him,” the supervisor said. “The adapter collar their JPL made lines up perfectly with the mount points for Tai Yang Shen. We should be good to go to roll out to the pad tomorrow, after inspections.” He smiled a little and added, “We might even get ahead of schedule if you could take him somewhere else.”
“Unfortunately I am ordered to go where he goes,” Jusheng sighed. “Hopefully he will be distracted by his colleagues when they arrive tomorrow.”
The supervisor shook his head. “I wouldn’t be, in his position,” he said. “And if I was that boorish.”
“It’ll all be over soon, sir,” Jusheng said soothingly. “Hold on to that thought.”
The supervisor frowned. “We’re going to have to give him a thank-you dinner,” he said. “Hospitality requires it. Boy, my crew and I, and the booster team, we’d all rather give him a short flight off the Great Wall without a mattress at the bottom.”
“Please try not to mistreat him,” Jusheng said. “This is supposed to be a moment of international cooperation between spacefaring nations.”
“Oh, we won’t poison him,” the supervisor said, showing his teeth. “But if he’s not used to the traditional dishes of our back-country work force, well, too bad for him.”
Jusheng sighed. “Could you at least restrain yourselves to one eyeball?”
“No promises, boy. Last I heard, pig embryos come with two eyes anyway.” The supervisor chuckled and added, “I wonder if we can get him to eat the placenta.”
Michael Hong still had his job, though he wasn’t sure he wanted it anymore.
He’d taken a pay cut, lost the little seniority he’d had, and was put under NASA supervision for the duration, but he had his job. The two other inspectors who’d signed off on what had turned out to be a deteriorating coupling on Sleipnir 3 had lost theirs, but only after clearing Hong.
When the special investigating committee had interviewed the inspection crews, Hong hadn’t said a word about his misgivings. After all, he’d signed off on the part along with the other two. Each of his former coworkers, when privately interviewed, had admitted that Hong had noticed something wrong and that they'd pressured him to ignore it. They'd both done it unprompted, whether out of guilt or obligation or something else Hong didn't understand. But for whatever reason, they'd fallen on their swords for him, although he heard both tried to pin final blame on NASA's schedule pressure. Their testimony had resulted in a second, more specific interview for Hong, and that interview had saved his job.
He didn’t deserve it. He’d knuckled under. The reasons didn’t matter; it was still his name on the inspection report that deliberately overlooked the discoloration which was the very beginning of corrosion from an oxygen leak due to the faulty seal. It hadn’t advanced enough to be obvious, to match up to what Hong had been trained to watch for. He’d failed in his job.
But… but if he resigned from SpaceX after this, his engineering career was dead. Gone. Over. No other aerospace firm would hire him. He wouldn’t even be able to get a job repairing thirty-year-old airliners in Africa. He might- might- be able to find a job as a high school science teacher, but that was all. He'd be remembered forever as one of the men who (almost) killed Mark Watney.
So he was still here, doing his job, hating himself the whole time.
Today, to be specific, he was the lone SpaceX man of a three-man final inspection team. The other two men were NASA inspectors, whose names Hong had heard but hadn't registered. Names weren't important; the inspection was. Most of the normal inspections had been tossed, with the launch date and time set and immovable, so this was the only pass they'd get. Fortunately this time the booster was brand new, just off SpaceX’s assembly line, without a refurbished part in it.
The probes went in the inspection ports, the little cameras snaking around the tanks, around the thrusters and guidance systems. Hong’s hands remained on the controls, moving the camera slowly, delicately, not missing one inch of the insides of the giant beast preparing to hurl a comparatively tiny package into deep space.
The longer the inspection went, the more his hands wanted to shake. He kept blinking. Several times he stopped to rub his eyes. Again and again he looked, trying to spot the flaws, the hidden flaws… hell, the obvious flaws.
There weren’t any.
Hong had inspected plenty of SpaceX rockets, some just off the assembly line, others before being refurbished, others after. He’d once sent a second stage that was fresh off the line back for seventeen corrections. There were always problems. ALWAYS problems. And with less than three days to go, there was no time to spare to fix a problem, so he had to find them right now.
He couldn’t find any, and that was impossible.
There was always a problem that needed fixing. Always.
So if he couldn’t find the problem, that meant there was something wrong with him.
“Okay,” one of the NASA men said, removing the probe from the last inspection port and preparing to seal it up again. “I wouldn’t have believed it, but it looks like-“
“I want to check again,” Hong said in a soft voice.
The two NASA men looked at each other, then at the SpaceX inspector standing between them. The second NASA man said quietly, “Did you see something?”
“No,” Hong admitted. “And that’s why I want to check again.”
The two NASA men exchanged another look. Then the first man said, “All right, Michael, I think we can spare a little time.”
Hong felt tears coming to his eyes, and it took a moment for him to realize it wasn’t from the Sleipnir 3 failure or from his terror of missing something on Sleipnir 4. “That’s the first time anyone I’ve worked with has called me Michael,” he said. “Thank you.”
“Er… you’re welcome?” the NASA man said, a bit confused.
“What do they call you?” the second NASA man said.
“Mickey,” Hong squeaked.
“Ah.” The two inspectors shared another look, this one of sympathy. “Michael, we’re both named Richard. Trust me when I say, we understand,” the second one said.
“Restart the inspection from the bottom?” the first man said.
“Thank you,” Hong said again.
Meanwhile, Hermes drew closer.
8895548 The pony in your avatar is entirely appropriate.
Okay, now you can panic.
What a couple of Dicks!
As an avid fanfic reader of all genres (not just here on FIMfic), I want you to know how backwards the Maretian flipped my typical M.O..
Usually, whenever I get into a new fanfic fandom (The Martian in this case), it usually starts by me either reading the source, or in this day and age, watching the movie. And after that, I read any fanfics based on the source material, and after that, I look into crossover fics.
In this case, I stumbled across The Maretian first. After reading through the entire story twice, I eventually managed to find and record The Martian on my DVR, and watched it. A few weeks after that, I had the time to listen to the audiobook on YouTube. And once that was done, I went down the list of all Martian fanfics on both FF.net and ao3 (didn't read most of them, but there were a few dozen that grabbed my interest).
So yeah, basically I backed myself into loving The Martian, and it's all because of your fic.
That being said, I just ordered the book (hardback, of course), the audiobook, and the Blu-Ray of The Martian from B&N this evening.
Three chapters in a row... Same ending line...
alarms start blaring like a nuclear plant meltdown
Either: 1)red herring, 2)sent to Eques/EqG, 3)CSP/ESA probe knocks them off course, or 4) Apollo 13-level disaster on board and they have to somehow aerobrake into HEO (High Earth Orbit) and gradually slow so they can land.
Alright, Kris... what's about to go down? That's 3 iterations of "Meanwhile, Hermes drew closer"... we all know that usually means something's about to happen
It isn't often that four simple words can have an entire audience about to crap their pants.
8895609
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is
enemy actionMars laughing at them.8895688
Considering that Mars has been described by the characters as activity hating them, enemy action might still be the right choice.
8895609
Oh OHOHOHOH that guy is in it now with the food, us Asian eat weird ass shit all the time..... I wonder he would love a fried rat with a side of fried ant larvae with a hit of snake vodka.
8895657
I certainly hope so... one of the few times I'm wishing I'll be wrong
"He’d one sent a second stage that was"
"He’d once sent a second stage that was"?
8895621
Panicking in 3, 2, 1...
I think it's understated how big Fireball probably is in China right now, considering how significant Dragons are in their culture.
Even better, try Bhutan! Their monarch is named "Dragon King" and they even have a Dragon on their flag. His name literally "Druk the Thunder Dragon!" Probably the coolest national symbol in the world!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Druk
Now that I'm at home and not at work when reading a new chapter, I can spend more time writing my thoughts in Notepad while I read.
It looks like the preferred spelling (in English) of the Chinese region you talked about is actually Xinjiang, not Sinkiang.
What kind of Chinese dish has pig embryos?
I look forward to the next long chapter. Like, 2,000 or more words. So far, the longest chapter has been SOl 88 at 5,247 words, but I'll be happy for anything.
8895640
I'm hoping it's a mixture of the first three. I'm hoping it's a red herring, BUT one of the ponies (either Starlight, Twilight, or somepony else) realizes that it's a possibility that they could, if they found the right universe, poof directly into Hermes' path, so in realizing this possibility, they take steps to prevent it, or create a way to quickly get out of the way if they end up in its path. I don't want to see any disaster. I want to see all 11 space travelers back safely on Earth, or barring that, the six Martians are temporarily brought to Equestria, and then full diplomatic relations open up and Mark gets to go home while any ponies who wish to can visit Earth. That's my hopeful ending.
So I've been thinking about this next thing for the past few chapters. I just wanted to list the number of known universes out there in this story:
1. The pony universe that sent our main characters.
2. The human universe that this story's Mark Watney lives in
3. The Equestria Girls human universe (with magic)
4. The pony universe where Nightmare Moon still rules (Angel 3's sixth trip)
5, 6, 7, 8, and 9: The first five successful trips of Angel 3 (low magic)
10, 11, 12, 13, and 14: Successful trips of Angel 4, one with emergency abort
15. Unknown, no magic (Angel 4)
16. Fine. (Angel 5)
17. Pony universe ruled by Empress Twilight Twinkle
18-24. Angel 6's trips, two with emergency abort. One trip presumably visited a human universe.
25. Human universe beseiged by hostile alien invaders (Angel 6).
26. Unknown universe, crashing on moon
In addition to these universes in the multiverse, I can think of a number of other universes implied to exist:
1. The original canon Equestria as shown in the television cartoon. No space travel is mentioned whatsoever.
2. The original canon human world of Equestria Girls as shown in Hasbro animation across various platforms. No space travel is mentioned or shown.
3. The real world right here that you and I live in every day, where nothing fantastical ever happens.
4. The human universe of the original The Martian book by Andy Weir.
5. The human universe of the film The Martian starring Matt Damon. Neither of these two universes features ponies, or horrible dust storms that are able to happen on Mars, and mankind has invented things that don't exist yet in universe 3's 2018.
I could go on listing alternate universes of other fan fictions I've read, but suffice to say that any fan fiction you read of anything, that fan fiction creates a brand new universe which is a copy of the universe it's based on, with small or large differences. And any other fan fictions based on the same property create their own universes unless specifically stated to take place in the same continuity as someone else's fan fiction, approved by the original fanfic author (for example, side fics to TwistedSpectrum's Five Score, Divided by Four that he approves of are in the same universe, but any he hasn't approved, and especially any that conflict with his story, are in their own universe. Ones that don't conflict may or may not be in his universe.)
ANYWAY, according to this, the Hermes will approach Earth in July 2036. So any reader reading my comment, you can use the facts in that PDF to get an idea of where we are in the timeline of things.
Wrote you a filk
So sit right back
And you'll hear a tale
A tale of a fateful trip
That started from this rocket port
Aboard this pony ship
The Skip was a mighty missile mare
The medic brave and true
Five astronauts were launched that day
On an inter-system tour
An inter-system tour
They encountered a tiny speck of rock
From their universe they were tossed
If not for the courage of the fearless crew
Amacitas would be lost
Amacitas would be lost
The ship's marooned on the surface of
The fourth planet of our sun
With Dragonfly,
the skipper too
The medic who loved to fly
The mighty mage
The dragon and the human man
Under cold Martian skies
So this is the tale of our castaways
They're here for a long, long time
They'll try to all survive on Mars
It's an uphill climb
In the cave farm and the canvas hab
They grow life's necessities
Mars tries to kill them every day
Inhospitable as can be
The human and the Skipper too
Will do their very best
To keep them all alive and well
In their fragile Martian nest
So join us here each night my friends
You're sure to get a smile
From all six stranded astronauts
Surviving Martian style
This day stood in juxtaposition to most, where you work hard and I procrastinate. Evidently we are opposites, for when you claim to have been relaxing, I wrote a ten page Turabian Comparative Bibliographical Essay about the Mark 14 torpedo. Well, relax tomorrow, I have to write another essay then, but mark my words come Wednesday I will do absolutely nothing and as a result, you will work like a Walmart employee on black friday! Hahahahahahaha!
8895621
To my reading, this is "time is running out" tension, not "it's gonna explode!"
The Martian was one of the best science-fiction films ever. The Maretian is quite an enjoyment to read.
8895651
Nah.
It's just Hermes is slow af and Ares original crew has zero screen time in this fic.
If Kris wouldn't remind us every once in a while, I would forget Lewis and co existed.
And so the buffer is revived! Praise be the buffer! And let it grow!
:D
I lost it at pocket turtle.
Its like lots of people putting two pieces of jigsaw together each, then those turning round and putting their pieces together and repeat. All of a sudden its done.
But if its sent back each time theres a problem and theres always a problem, then it would never be completed? Then again, theres something wobbling about. How to do the equivalent of the Navahoe Perfection fuze?
8895651
Obviously, what's going to happen is that Hermes will draw closer.
Maybe Hermes is just cold and shivering in the depths of space, drawing closer to Earth for warmth.
Everything seems to going well. I'm just worried about what will happen when the sleep deprivation hits the fan.
Meanwhile, Hermes draws closer.
It hadn’t advanced enough to be obvious, to match up to what Hong had been trained to watch for.
Sounds like they needed some sacrificial lambs.
8896266 More that they felt guilty and confessed. Maybe it wasn't their fault for not recognizing the warning sign as such, but it was definitely their fault for not looking more closely when Hong pointed it out. And most people who work for space contractors are gung-ho true believers in human space flight- not the kind of people who play CYA when they've screwed up big time.
8895651
I mean, It should be pretty obvious that at this point Kris is simply having fun with the phrase (aka trolling the audience) because of how much people have been jumping at it since it first appeared. There are probably quite a few chapters to come that will end with said phrase just because of the reader reactions
8896188
It's actually quite the opposite. Spaceships need to keep heat generation and heat loss in perfect balance. Human bodies are exothermic. Machines inside the ship are exothermic. The engines produce some interior heat. Electrical systems are exercises in resistance loss, so that's more waste heat. All this heat needs to be radiated out of the ship rather than lost to air as is the case with atmospheric vessels.
We maintain our body temperature through heat loss to the air around us. Space doesn't give that option, so it has to be done through, say, infrared radiation.
Have you ever played the first Mass Effect game? In it, the SSV Normandy ship can cloak itself by dumping heat into internal sinks, thereby eliminating its infrared signature on other ships' sensors. If it were to stay cloaked long enough, the crew would be killed by higher internal temperatures.
There is always, always, a problem to find when you peer review something. If that problem is worth the time correcting is another matter.
I expect Hong to find something really minor, like a bolt not torqued down to optimal tightness. Or, the worst nightmare, continue to find nothing to comment on. Because just like he thought: just because you don't find anything wrong doesnt mean there is nothing wrong to find. Just that you didn't find it.
8896380 You don't think Hermes just wants to snuggle, then?
8896380
Microwave rectanna arrays can operate at 95% plus, and current 3 year old technology climb optical rectannas are now claimed to be as high as 0.1% efficient.
Optical Rectanna Research.
The aim of course eventually over the next 20 years or so is to make optical broadband rectannas as effiicnt as Vantablack, which would give strange problems in power generation.
This of course is just one research groups announced work on the technology, there should be expected to be others world wide.
8895929
Except that everything seems to be going well. They're on-track to make the deadline so there's no tension around whether they'll run out of time. The tension is whether something goes wrong...
8895911
What is such a thing even?
I really love that last bit of the chapter. I like that you elaborated on the book's mention of Mitch's abrasive behavior with the Chinese team, but I really enjoyed the dichotomy of the next section, wherein another character not typically liked by his coworkers but dedicated to getting it right has his moment of vulnerability, and is for ONCE met with understanding. Also shows how important it is to call someone by the name they prefer; hurtful nicknames really are hurtful.
8896660
Yep.
well as of now i am starting chapter 5.
i am vary interested in this story and i am pretty sure i know the movie this is loosely based around.
8896136
Or they'll have a Mir-style docking SNAFU.
8897561 What Mir had- twice- was beyond SNAFU and straight into TARFU.
8896136
groan. reminds me of a lousy episode of Nova: it was supposed to discuss what it would be like if a tornado hit a large city, like Chicago.
BUT the idiot writers decided their ONLY job was to be overly over-dramatic simply for the sake of being overly over-dramatic!
think i'm exaggerating? let me summarize what they ACTUALLY said:
"a tornado forms over the lake."
"no one notices, they are busy going about their daily lives."
"the tornado draws closer."
"still no one notices."
"the tornado draws closer."
"still no one notices."
after 15 minutes of that i gave up. and it was a 1-hour episode...
Trying to poison me, eh? They know full well I'm allergic to mammalian flesh thanks to tick bite-induced anaphylaxis!
Commie spies, all of em!
Just think about it I think humans would be the alien face eating monsters for any earth-foreign species we stumble upon. After all we even eat unborn babies.
Mickey Dick x2!
Ah, non export Chinese food. Just like with real Peking Duck you get its head, sliced in two.
Welcome to the world of actual Chinese food.
America vs China
This cooperation is going well
Dammit people, top tier diplomacy there
Ooh, ouch. Call him nitpicky again!
Look on the bright side, Hong. No nicknames
Welcome to NASA
Remarks and corrections:
> “The problem is that he won’t give us credit for knowing what we are talking about- or doing! And every time one of my workers sets down a tool and wipes his face, he’s there, shouting at him, calling him lazy-“
You lost your italics halfway through this. I assume you wanted to un-italicise "us" but you didn't re-italicise the rest, and used normal italics to stress "we" afterwards.