Twilight had to save Equestria. She had to try.
Minor Content Warning: This story includes mentions of bloody ice spikes, and a slow, painful death, as well as brief descriptions of character death.
Written for the 1000 words contest, hosted by Bicyclette.
Well this is by no means bad, but it is... err abrupt? Not sure if that is because you're bound by 1000 words or if it was purposely written that way.
Solid writing, but I don't know if I can say I enjoy reading about the girls dying.
11649861
I was very constrained by the limits, otherwise, I'd have gone into depth about the journey, her adventure, etc, and what all else led up to this in full. which, I might still do once the comp is up. I can say i didn't enjoy writing them die but it was planned as part of the story.
11649877
A longer version sounds quite intriguing. One with the gradual deterioration of Twilight's mental state as she watches her friends die one by one. Lmk if you ever decide to do so, I'd be very interested.
11649883
def will do! I appreciate the interest and will maybe try to write something if i have the time!
My guess, Twilight was burned out from all her adventures and couldn’t take it anymore. So she went into denial about the coming disaster… until it was far too late….
that was perfect!
11649962
Hmm you're on the right track! Check the ending one more time ;)
11653725
With all due respect, I did explain to another user, and in my description, that this story was highly constrained due to the 1000 word limit. Remember that there are real people behind the stories you comment on. I would have taken your comment better if you weren't so rude about how you worded your criticism. There is a massive difference in constructive criticism and just being mean.
oh no!
oof that is quite an awful fate. poor purple mare!
and oof. it would work extra well on powerful unicorns and alicorns then, it seems
aww she does have a sweet voice!
yeah i would be silent after that too
oof! that is quite gruesome
and damn, those Windigoes sure are something! when they take their vengeance, they really take their vengeance.
thank you for writing!
Yes, how could Twilight let this happen? Why did she let this happen? Very pertinent questions that the story raises but doesn’t actually answer, especially when literally the first thing Twilight did in canon was find an ancient prophecy of doom and take steps to address it.
This is manufactured drama pure and simple. We get no rationale for why everything is awful and everyone is dead, it just is and they just are. Sorry, but this kind of thing is a major pet peeve for me, and the whole story rubbed me the wrong way as a result. All that being said, thank you for entering the contest.
11698543
While I understand what you're getting at, I feel as though your criticism is unfair. Am I the best in giving context in such a small limit? Obviously not. I'll get better the more I write stories in such a constrained limit.
But the questions are answered. As I told others, there is a major hint in the story *right at the end* as to why she didn't do anything. All she knows is she stood complacent and feels guilt, but even she doesn't know why. There are implications as to why.
I'd by lying if I said I didn't take offense to your statement about this being "manufactured" as you worded it. It's not just "as they are" and so on. I'm not a writer who only thinks of just this story slice details and nothing more. I have an entire story that leads up to this in my head, a world built, and more. Which I do plan on utilizing, if I can find the time. I just felt this part would be most interesting to enter into a competition.
Sorry for rubbing you the wrong way, I guess, but please consider that this is just a slice of an even bigger story, and was meant to lead to even more questions and theories. Did I do well to get that point across? Apparently not, that's fine, I'll do better next time.