Due to an unusual lapse in communication, Twilight and Rainbow Dash travel to Canterlot only to discover something sinister may be unfolding within the castle walls. A mysterious horror awaits. Something different. Comments always welcomed and appreciated.
This is disturbing already!
9705265
As is the intention! Haha.
9705306
I know. "Master of Puppets," anyone? (That's a Metallica song.)
9706963
Good choice
9709442
Ooh. Now I know I'm doing something right. Hehe
What is this a crossover of?
9714798
Nothing that I am directly aware of. Just trying to write a good yarn.
9716026
Who knows where it goes.. But I am liking these comparisons!
And into tha fire?
9732756
Only the shadow..knows..
Why is chapter fourteen so long compared to the rest of the chapters?
9795711
Simply got inspired to write, so I did
9939798
Hmm? Hehe. If you're happy and you know it clap your hooves..
Shouldn't there be an OC tag, for whatever force is targeting Twilight and Rainbow?
9971134
Oh. Hadn't thought about it.
Okay, so far the story is amazing. Even though it's progressing so fast you kept it interesting and never once failed to add something new and horrifying to the mix. There are some minor grammatic errors but I see them only once every few chapters.
Just keep on writting cause you're doing great and I can't wait to see what happens with Luna and Rainbow Dash in the next chapter.
I can't believe this story has so little likes and comments, it definitely deserves more.
Also the figures sort of sound like the 4 horsemen of apocalypse.
9987986
Wow. Thanks lots. Sounds like I am doing good. Hehehe.
At last a new chapter has appeared. You didn't disappoint, it's awesome.
But I suggest you split the text to more chapters, it feels much too long like this. Almost all of your chapters have 1000 words so it feels weird to read the 3 with 10000 words.
Also, I think you should ease a bit with the descriptions in chapters, it feels a tiny bit weird to read these:
Nevertheless it was a beautiful chapter, you really managed to show the despair the characters feel and their will to fight.
Looking forward to the next chapter.
10096420
Think you might be missing a slight bit of the point. Hehehe. I will take your words under advisement though, but I simply felt to get writing and it is best to keep going when I do or there might be nothing at all or too much to split in a good way..
10096501
True, best to keep going while you have the inspiration.
And at the end of the day, it doesn't matter what I or someone else might prefer, all that matters is that you write the story on your mind.
How many chapters long will this story be?
10139818
I don't quite know. I do know where I'm heading with it though. As long as it will be. Haha
Well you still managed to keep things interesting, so cheers to that. Im wondering tho, have you considered putting founders of equestria as puppets? It'd be interesting to see Hurricane and others fight, given that they were warriors.
10374270
Many ideas. Not done yet by any means. Hehe. Been slowed on writing by some home renovations and alterations. In other words the big bangup will be coming.
The purple prose really isn't working for ya.
10993643
Know what kind of comment is both futile, useless, and pointless? that kind