AMICITAS FLIGHT THREE – MISSION DAY 505
ARES III SOL 496
TRANSCRIPT – AUDIO EXCHANGE BETWEEN ESA AMICITAS AND NASA EXPLORATION VESSEL HERMES
HERMES (Martinez): Hey, Mark! This is Martinez! Man, you’re really hustling across Mars these past few days! A guy might almost think you were in a hurry to get off the planet!
NASA wants me to tell you to keep heading straight east for the next two days. Most of that is gonna be flat and level ground except for some sand dunes… but at the end of it you’ll be out of Meridiani Planum. From there the ground will get rugged again, and the closer you get to Edom Crater and what you call the Entrance Ramp, the quicker the terrain rises.
Right now you’re about eleven hundred meters below zero level, where you’ve more or less been for the past week. The crest of Entrance Ramp is two hundred meters above zero, and you’ll gain half of that in the last two sols. And be careful once you start down, because in less than forty kilometers you drop almost five hundred meters elevation. That’s about a 1.5 degree grade if it were level, but you and I both know it won’t be.
So there you are, Mark- don’t say we didn’t warn ya.
Okay, enough with that- it’s time to get down to business. Could you put Commander Berry on? I’ll stand by until I hear her voice. Over.
AMICITAS (Watney): Thanks for the heads up. On the one hand, Meridiani is spoiling us. On the other, the mostly flat land is getting a bit hypnotic. Last night I dreamed that there was no Earth, no pony world, no outer space, just an infinite plane of Mars, and I was cursed to wander it like a Mad Max knockoff.
I tell you, man, I am definitely in a hurry to get off this planet. So far as I’m concerned you guys can show up here the sol after we make it to the MAV. I don’t care if the mods aren’t done. I will learn to fly and fucking well PULL the thing into space if I have to. I am prepared to walk all the way back to Earth if somebody shows me the road.
Anyway, it’s good to hear your voice. Chris? Vogel? You guys can feel free to talk any time. I’m getting a little tired of hearing just Johanssen and Lewis every day.
Anyway, here comes Cherry.
AMICITAS (Cherry Berry): Hi, Major Martinez! It’s good to hear your voice! What can I do for you? Over.
HERMES (Martinez): Morning, Commander Berry! NASA just sent us the updates to the MAV launch software, including the flight simulator. They’ve also sent it to the MAV. When Mark activates the MAV, it’ll automatically update. NASA wants you working on that simulator every sol you’re there, and they want me to help walk you through it. They want to be sure you’re fit to fly in case the automatic launch sequence fails and I can’t override from Hermes, or if you have to fly direct to Earth on that warp drive of yours.
NASA said I had to make it real clear; they haven’t decided who will actually fly the launch, you or me. They’re not saying you will; they’re not saying you won’t. They’re just not saying, comprende? But I’ll do everything I can to make sure you’re fit to fly, because I know if we switched places I wouldn’t want my life in anyone’s hands other than my own. We’re gonna be a team, for this, you get me? Over.
AMICITAS (Cherry Berry): Thanks, Major! I worked hard to learn your systems in the MDV simulator. And you’re right. I want to fly again a lot. Really, a lot. I learned good English just so I could be the one to fly the MAV. I’ll make you proud! Over.
HERMES (Martinez): Okay, that’s the spirit! Now listen: the system we use requires two people. The pilot watches what the launch program is doing and engages manual override if the program can’t cope. Then we have the system operations crew member, or sysop for short. They monitor the systems and tell the pilot how they’re doing. Sometimes they tweak things to improve chances for a successful launch. Up here that’s Johanssen’s job. We’ll both be watching you all the way through launch, but you need a sysop on your end to be in the comm loop and give you instant updates.
You’ll also need a third crew member to run your Sparkle Drive. NASA decided not to give the launch program authority to turn the drive on. Instead they made some control software which will, um… something about pulse frequencies. It’s got a slider bar, is all I know. Your drive will still connect to a computer, but not the main MAV computer, and you’ll have to decide if it’s safe to use.
Okay? You’re gonna have to pick these people out for me, Commander Berry. I can’t do it for you. Over.
AMICITAS (Cherry Berry): Huh. I’m gonna have to think about that, Major. I’d like Mark to be sysop. He trained on this system for years with you. But he’s going to be too busy with the MAV mods. So I think it’ll be Dragonfly, if she’s fit. She was our ship engineer, and she’s an experienced pilot and capcom too. Spitfire will be her backup- she ran the MDV sims back at the Hab.
And of course Starlight Glimmer will run the Sparkle Drive! She made it! The only reason we don’t call it the Starlight Drive is because she asked we not name it for her!
AMICITAS (Starlight Glimmer) (shouted off-mike, very faint): Not true! Twilight Sparkle did most of the work! I only made the final arrays!
AMICITAS (Cherry Berry): And who made the actual drives? All of them? Personally?
AMICITAS (Starlight Glimmer): (inaudible)
AMICITAS (Cherry Berry): Right. Sorry about that, Major. We’ll let you speak now. Over.
HERMES (Martinez): Sounds good to me, Commander Berry! It’s your decision, and you know your crew. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get in some sim time myself. I can’t train you if I don’t try it out first! Tell Major Spitfire I hope she’s getting better! Out!
AMICITAS (Spitfire): Thanks, Major. I will fly again. You watch me. Out.
Too bad there isn't a map charting their course on Mars.
So Mark is the Sparkle MAV's engineer?
"I'm giving it all I can Captain!"
Well, things are going swimmingly right now. There's 55 sols until launch. Who wants to bet that Mars will find some new and horrible way to screw the astronauts in that interval?
Possibly literally?9166043 Don't say that too loud, or the Church of Scientology will sue you for copyright infringement. :)
9166088 The ones available online are pretty close to accurate, except that the southward turn from what the book called the "Watney Triangle" begins at the edge of Trouvelot and goes almost straight south to the north edge of Crommelin, after which the route tracks southeast until it hits the line of the book's trip again.
I couldn't find any evidence of a crater on Mars called "Edom". There's an "Edam", but it's west and south of Schiaparelli. Where is Edom?
9166088
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a9/The_route_of_'The_Martian'_-_from_Chryse_Planitia_over_Arabia_Terra_in_the_Martian_highlands_to_Ares_4.jpg
9166142 According to the National Geographic detailed elevation map I'm using, Edom is the proper name of "Entrance Crater", in the northwest rim of Schiaparelli.
9166108 Quoting the book: "If I could have anything, it would be a radio to ask NASA the safe path down the Ramp. Well, if I could have anything, it would be for the green-skinned yet beautiful Queen of Mars to rescue me so she can learn more about this Earth thing called 'lovemaking'."
9166152
Too bad they don't mention it here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schiaparelli_%28Martian_crater%29
9166155
Remember, if we can trust ERB, any Martian babe who has green skin usually has four arms, four breasts and huge tusks.
It's the red-skinned Martian babes you want to take home to Mom.
John Carter swears by them. :)
Gotta say, "Starlight Drive" is a much better name for an FTL drive.
9166113
I think it's talking about her suit, with its damage, specifically, not a suit.
9166104
9166108
What if the Spitfire's weather stunt somehow accelerates the terraforming (equisforming?) of Mars? Probably would tick off the malevolent entity...
Starlight Drive would have been a better name for it too.
9166356
I agree it sound more FTL like
9166202
Actually, they have two jump drive models now. Derivated from original Sparkle Experimental Short-range High-frequency Translocation Device (Sparkle Drive Prototype for short), they now have Starlight Short-range High-frequency Teleport Device (Starlight Jump Drive) and Sparkle High-range Interdimentional Translocation Device (Sparkle Trans-dimentional Drive).
Just shows how bad the driving conditions are when you have to take care that the steepest grade you hit is less than half that on mainline railways. Then again, on the steepest grades, railways had Banking Engines, extra traction units for pushing and braking, which Mark and crew dont get. Even so, 1 in 85 vector is 500 kg forward mass vector spread over all those wheels so the weight equivalent to one Earth g astronaut? Thats a very weakly bound surface to slide under those conditions, Even Teflon, wet ice on wet ice is 0.04, or 1 in 25?
it looks like plans are coming to gather, (looks like)
9166631
The Winnybago is overloading the Rovers it is perched on. Beyond that, perching the Amicitas on the back of Rover 2 almost certainly made the whole assembly top heavy. The concern on a slope, besides the extra power consumption of going upslope? And the Rover motors are heavily loaded to begin with, a steep enough slope might push them past as far as they could move. When they have to turn, like to go around rough terrain? Then that puts them at an angle to the slope and the potential for the Winnybago to tip over if the slope is steep enough.
Roles assigned, plans made... and Mars plotting. Though first they have to worry about making it into the crater.
9166104
"I cannae change the laws o' physics, Cherry! That's Starlight's job!"
9166202
It does sound more space related, but I can't help but think it's like the German Chocalate Cake, which has nothing to do with Germany, and everything to do with Samuel German, for whom it was named in honor of. A Starlight drive has nothing to do with starlight (small 's') and everything to do with Starlight Glimmer. From how it actually works, rapid oscillation of off and on for short jumps, Sparkle is pretty good. Alternatively, I'd personally go for Glimmer drive (alliteration not withstanding) or Shimmer drive (if she were at all involved and to keep the alliteration) if Sparkle was off the table. That's how my mind works, anyway.
9166631 The key point is that, just because the average slope is 1.4 degrees over forty kilometers, does NOT mean that the actual slope at any point is only 1.4.
9166738 Subocaji is referring to Ad Astra, whose hobby is imagining monstrous and terrifying alien species. (She's going to be very disappointed in Mark.)
9166749
Or
Mark: I cannae change the laws o' physics, Cap'n. Ye must be thinkin' of fanciful things like unicorns and pegasuseseses (sic).
Cherry: Celestia damnit.
Spitfire: I'm a specialist. You want a generalist.
Starlight: Coffee break.
Mark: Where did you get coffee?
Cherry: And are there cherries?
Starlight: Supply drop, just over there. Oh, and cherry flavoring packs, yes.
Cherry: Well done specialist, Glimmer!
9166817 Why not the Moondancer Drive? Get all the Sparkle clones a chance.
9166868
My overly literal brain cites the same reason as Starlight, minus the concern for alliteration. This also applies to Sunset (awesome though she may be).
Now, Dancer, I might be able to get behind, as the drive does make short hops.
9166738
Yep Ad Astra I believe 😀
9166178 Ah yes, Barsoom. Of course, red Martians, while looking almost identical to humans, are opivarous with 1000 year natural lifespans, though the latter may be due to ancient medical tinkering. Certainly their version of Genesis (which involves several different species being born from a tree) makes no more sense than any of ours.
Not that it stopped John Carter getting busy with Deja Thoris and having a kid, Carthoris. Which suggest red Martian biology is even wierder than already described.
9167159 Nope. Hermes was the first through the blackout zone, or else it would have gone a week to ten days longer. Sleipnir 2, I believe, would only have come out of blackout a day before Earth.
9166879
Use Asimov\Keith principle and call it TSSG Drive, Second Generation. Or Starlight Glimmer model
I think, Keith used dash between names of inventors, so TS-SG.
9166970
Let's not forget the 8 legged beaver tailed horse/pony analogs Thoats.
9165850
Ahhhh, okay that makes more sense now. I had forgotten that they were using the ponyphone.
9167380 I hadn't given them any thoat.
My lesser thoat,
My lesser thoat,
Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh, ahhhh!
My lesser thoat, I used to wonder what valour could be,
Until you shared it's magic with me!
Big adventures,
Lots of fights,
Heroic journeys,
Martial might!
Comrades in honour,
No defeat,
And romance makes it all complete!
My lesser thoats,
We'll be together till the very eeeend!
Barsoom is a far more martial culture, their version of MLP would probably be focussed on different values. The lesser thoat is the riding animal commonly used by red Martians, while the greater thoat is used by the green Martian race.
9166990
I figure suborbital and LEO flights would be best done with a spaceplane. You'd get the most use out of the aerodynamic surfaces. It's a pretty old idea, Von Braun's 1955 plans for a station and Lunar mission relied on a spaceplane. I haven't seen 2001 in years, maybe I should watch it again.
9167534
Ah but Mr. Carter could very well be called the warlord of friendship for he taught it's value to the Tharks.
"Jeddak of Helium," returned Tars Tarkas, "it has remained for a man of another world to teach the green warriors of Barsoom the meaning of friendship; to him we owe the fact that the hordes of Thark can understand you; that they can appreciate and reciprocate the sentiments so graciously expressed."
"A Princess of Mars" Edgar R. Burroughs
9167520 Ponyphone? Is that anything like the Muppaphone?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1YAUeOk2Hk
9167824
Yup, it's how I view the Ponies' radio and shall from this point forward!
Sparkle sparkle!
Fuck yeah sparkle sparkle!
9168108
And then twilight was a pokemon.
:"Sparkle? Sparkle spark? Sparkle."
9170324
Glimmer glimmer? Glim? GLIMMER?! *panicky horse noises*
Starlight Drive...
-In?
Anyone?
Is it wrong that I imagine Martinez being played by Samuel L Jackson?
9167689
Seems plausible to me!
O yeah! Time to sim until the equicment overheats
Nice Chapters
9170324
reminds me of a gag in that crazy "mlp time loops":
"Rarity Rarity Rarity Rarity?"
"Sparkle Sparkle Sparkle."
translation:
"why are we Pokemon?"
"i don't know."
Remember folks. If something do wrong, just get out the Space viacle and push. It is just like in the situation where your car is on strike
Ponies is space, coming soon 🙏
11243270
The name of the story?