The opening of the Empire has also meant the reintroduction of the species who live there. It's been over a thousand years since Equestria has been through this particular migration -- more than enough time to forget how hyper-territorial, angry, unreasoning, and just plain foul these travelers are. But it's finally the right season again, and that means Ponyville is about to get a refresher course in dealing with the second-worst thing to ever come out of the North.
...well, maybe first.
(A stand-alone, no prior-reading-necessary part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits are welcome. )
Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.
And now we have a bored Apple Bloom in a house with the idea of tinkering with chemistry. And then she gets a Cutie mark out of it because Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle aren't around. And then things start going off the rails...
Also, I didn't notice how much emotion can be conveyed with just dialog like that. Cool.
My Leg!
Can it fly and punch things with its wings at the same time?
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/6b/e3/61/6be361d6c099dd69cb3ad9946acf6153.jpg
Are you saying that I can't handle some wimpy food? I'll eat a double portion AND LIKE IT!
...If Sombra was the one to bring the Empire back, wouldn't the geese have come regardless?
Congratulations, Spike. I'm mentally appointing you the new Captain America.
I haven't read any other comments. Am I the only one who took the Pinkie Senses Ten Dollar Reward Special?
Wow just dropping 40,000 word story like that. I thought this was going to be another one of your mid four digit comedies. Not that I'm complaining. I'm not. I'm just probably not going to read it because I'm a horrible person who mostly only read short stories other than Austraeoh. But it's coming from you so I'm sure it's good. See now I sound like an asshole. But hey, I follow you, Love reading your blogs, and support you on patreon, so I must think you're doing something right, right?
Oh man, I've been looking forward to this since the original blog post...
43k words, huh? Here I was expecting something in the 6-16k range... Well, that more than explains the delays, and gives me yet more reason to be jealous, but more importantly it gives me something big to read
7185145
Don't worry: someone will be along to call it the surest hallmark of a lazy & unskilled writer in a minute... (But truthfully, I think it works best when you already know the characters well enough to hear their voices.)
My running gag!
If Rainbow can hover... Fly-by wing swipes aren't kind either. As for the return of the geese being inevitable: it's partially how Fluttershy and the others are choosing to perceive the situation. Remember, the last barriers didn't really go down until after the fight.
Oh, here we go...
(I was going to put a piece of fanart showing Spike as Cap here. And then Google told me there wasn't one. How did we all miss that?)
No: including yourself, four people asked for the preview password, and one person sent a few PMs as the story progressed. You're just the only one who decided to get First Comment! Or in this case, first six.
(For everyone who has no idea what we're talking about: one of my Patreon rewards for sponsors is that every so often, I'll randomly offer people at that level early access to a story. In this case, a few people were basically watching while it was being written. Literally, because based on the active chapter being-viewed count, I know I went through at least two compositions with someone peeking over my shoulder.)
7200798
I said I was going to get this one into the New column as a single post, accurately tagged as Complete on the day it went up, or it wasn't going up at all. I meant it. If I'd gone with putting up ten chapters in ten days, some people might have just shrugged at the final word count. It's having it hit all at once which makes an impact.
For the sake of sanity, it's sometimes best to treat stories (and infinity) as a sequence of smaller bits.
Back where I used to live, the junkyard didn't have a dog.
They had geese.
7200806
Hi. I'm Estee.
That's my evening sorted out then. Well, this and David Attenborough's new series...
Well, I guess my first thought is "let's ask the crystal ponies how they used to deal with them," but then the obvious answer would be "King Sombra", and... sometimes the cure is worse than the disease.
Okay, this was one of the funniest stories I have ever read in recent memory. Seriously, it takes a great author to write a funny over 40,000 word story with a invasion of geese as the centerpiece.
Between Discord, Harry the bear, and Angel bunny, it's a wonder that anypony tries to skip out without paying. Maybe she ought to put up a sign...
7200969
But when she was absent -- well, the cottage grounds always had their share of carnivores. Very defensive carnivores. There was a silent understanding that Intruders Would Be Dealt With, although Snowflake had sometimes wondered if Fluttershy would benefit from a sign reading Bill Disputers May Be Eaten.
7200963
Using species names as direct attacks is something of a time-honored tradition.
I love this so much.
Quick, Rarity, dust off your
woodchipperPhoenix-b-gone.Speaking as a Canadian who lives near a University with lotsa large green spaces...
I wish they only stayed nine hours.
Beautifully done as always Estee. Even though I find myself with an overwhelming urge to punch the mayor in the mouth.
it was funny to start with and kept getting better. At this point I lost it " Fluttershy briefly went full Twilight." Having seen and in a few small ways dealt with geese your description is spot on.
I’m glad you liked the names.
7201101
And thankee again.
I just hope the Author's Note on the last chapter (where I credited everyone from the original blog post) is showing up. It doesn't always appear in the non-edit window during composition.
An unlikely saviour arises... Mr. Flankington!
Wow. I wasn't expecting this. Don't know what I was expecting, but not an engrossing exploration of responsibility, deep-seated abandonment issues, ingenuity, the limits of thaumobiology, the logical consequences of a special talent in politics, the perils of pure academia, weaponized boysenberries...
Yeah, this was a trip and a half, even if I don't agree with the idea of where the ultimate responsibility lies... unless Sombra was going to kill the geese. Which I could certainly see. He certainly wouldn't tolerate an entire flock of competing tyrants.
(Also, I have to admit, I did a double take when I say my name in the author's note. I'd forgotten about that comment.)
Thank you for this, Estee. It's always good to see an idea come to fruition, and this one was especially enjoyable.
7201003 Ditto, and this is only with birds. Imagine just how painful it would be for a stallion (of a type she had spent extensive time with a measuring tape and close inspection) who attempted anything unwelcome.
"So," said the doctor as he lifted the poor sobbing stallion's tail and peered into the resulting space, "how did you get a pincushion stuck up there?"
There goes Pinkie. Here come the tubas...
7201134
Or he just might have been considering whether he had the makings of a slow-strike avian army.
Huh...makes sense Spike would be the one to know what to do about magical overexertion.
Smart, Spike, very very smart. When everyone is looking at the target, somebody has to mind the weapon.
The big problem with the blame idea is that they didn't bring the Empire back, they just stopped Sombra from retaking the throne. So that doesn't really work even before the debate begins =|
And this is why Rainbow Dash is a more productive author than I.
43,126 words and not one of them is 'gander'.
Looks like the gender imbalance in Equestria isn't limited to ponies,
*Alondro spies a Canada goose...* DIE YOU FILTHY POOP MACHINES!!! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!!!!
(They've reached Biblical plague numbers here in NJ.)
7201257
Then for 'bring back,' try 'integrated'. But it's their perspective on events, and they're sort of right on top of it.
7201263
As I understand it, for linguistics alone, "goose" will be singular for either gender, with "geese" as the plural. I have a harder time dealing with cattle, which is a species that has accepted gender-specific terms and no common singular neutral.
But for what it's worth, you can safely assume half of them were males.
7201269
May 9th, 2016: the first time Alondro ever had a public underreaction.
Look up in the sky! Its a bird! Its a plane! No! Its the Royal Canadian Geese Force!
7185145 Canada geese attacked me one time... they foolishly thought I was as weak as other hyoomans...
The corpses of those foolish few taught the rest to flee in terror at the sight of me.
Same goes for white-tailed deer.
(Alondro: The REAL Jersey Devil)
7201305
7201286
I'm just bitter because my high school mascot was a gander; kinda hard to be enthusiastic about sports when your rivals from the next town over have a snarling tiger painted on everything and all you've got for backup is a smelly oversized duck,
7201329 Well, you could look at it this way: tigers are critically endangered, while Canada geese have taken over half a continent.
Soo... yay?
7201329
Works for Oregon.
visitpb.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/10/oregon-ducks-logo-visit-pb-pacific-beach-alehouse.jpg
Besides, if it's Canada Goose vs. Tiger, someone's going to risk a dollar on the goose.
7201342
See, that works. That's Donald... Donald I get; nobody wants to pick a fight with a duck that knows Firaga and has anger management issues:
49.media.tumblr.com/f1f80ce8b55ade5f41b195f12cfbb8ea/tumblr_nyy6mbFNdt1tlxl72o1_400.gif
We had this schmuck:
rondout.k12.ny.us/common/pages/GalleryPhoto.aspx?photoId=14911889&width=800&height=600
... What are you even doing, dude...
Oh, goody. The evilest of all evil birds. They just might have to surrender. Also, this is going to make the loss of the West Orchard to predators and ecologists seem like a picnic.
Now, I absolutely HAVE to share this email I sent Estee during the early process.
You know, if you're evil, you'll resolve it this way.
"You are incorrect, Twilight." Princess Celestia took a step forward and carefully levitated her crown, petryal, and all four golden hoof-boots to one side and made a small pile of the symbols of her position. "We have seen these geese before, and know how to properly put them in their place."
Luna closed her eyes and rested a hoof against her forehead. "Please, Celly. Not in public."
"There's really no choice, sister. It was not I who started this." Celestia strode forward regardless of the squishing noises from underhoof, paused a goodly distance away from the irate goose, and spread out her great white wings.
"Honk," she declared.
The goose responded as if he had been... well, goosed. He lowered his head and spread out his own not inconsiderable wings, which although they were smaller than the Princess of the Sun, seemed just as strong. With a loud hiss, he waddled forward several steps and seeming intentionally dropped a load of slimy dung behind him.
Celestia hissed back, lowering her head and bracing herself to charge...
She does have a consistent problem with the Crusade, doesn't she?
As soon as I saw that title and cover picture.
I think you meant fowl.
7201547
No. No, I do not.
7201371
Donald's crazy, man. It was the war. The best parts of his soul got left on the bloodstained sand of some tropical island in the South Pacific. He ain't never been the same.
No really.