“Nopony moves...” Pinkie Pie spoke in earnest, waving her forelimbs apart. “...nopony dies.”
Rainbow Dash bit her lip. Every tiny tremble caused more and more fractures to spiderweb across the petrified wooden planks beneath her. Her marefriends held their breaths as she looked from left and right, desperately judging the scale of the fractured rooftop beneath her.
“Uhm... maybe...” Twilight braved a hopeful smile. “M-maybe it wouldn't be that terrible a height if you just dropped down through?”
Rarity vigorously shook her head. “You think the roof is bad, darling?” She gulped, gesturing downward. “The two stories beneath us have already given way. There's jagged rock and broken splinters exposed through the floor below.”
Rainbow grimaced. “Frig...”
“Rainbow...” Fluttershy murmured, drifting closer. “Not to make a bad situation worse, but the griffons are sweeping closer.”
“Friggin' frig.” Rainbow inhaled and exhaled.
The air crackled as more planks of wood bent and warped around her. Cold mists wafted closely overhead, chilling the pegasus. Goosebumps formed along her shaved scalp and next.
“Any chance you can hop on another cloud, Dashie?” Pinkie asked.
“There's nothing condense enough for that to work,” Rainbow grumbled. “And I'm afraid to hop in any direction or... or...”
CRACK!
Rainbow's weight shifted down.
The four ghostly mares gasped.
Rainbow squinted one eye, wincing. She jolted in place, barely supported by a crossbeam below. Meanwhile, the loud crack of the fragile rooftop...
...echoed across the Mist Cliffs, dipping down into the ravine. Every jutting needle and column of granite resonated with the noise.
Commander Seraphimus paused in mid-flight. “...?” She tilted her helmeted gaze up.
The two Sergeants heard it too. Starstorm and Raptr stopped gliding across their respective sides of the mountains. Their hawkeyes traveled up to the misty ridge overlooking the lower topography.
“What in Goddess' name was that?” Starstorm stammered.
Raptr blinked. “A boulder, perhaps?” He glanced across the group. “We did kick up quite a breeze just now.”
Seraphimus took a deep breath.
“Commander?”
“Resume your search,” she ordered. Wings flexing, she slowly drifted north. “I shall go investigate.”
“Yes, ma'am.”
Fw-Fwoosh! Seraphimus soared upward, eyes piercing.
Instantly, Fluttershy trembled.
“Mmmm!” She spun about. “Rainbow Dash! Their leader—”
“Right. Got it.” Rainbow gnashed her teeth, staring down at her locked legs against the splintering wood. “Time to move.”
“But where?!” Twilight Sparkle exclaimed. “If you so much as tremble—”
Rarity spoke over her. “Rainbow, if you can make it to the north end of the shack...”
“Yeah...?”
Rarity gulped. “It'll surely be arduous... but...” She pointed. “There's a steep slope descending down the north end of the ridge. If you can make it there, it should be an easy gallop into the plateau of Ivory Prefecture.”
“Whatever you do, Dashie, you'd better do it quick!” Pinkie squeaked.
“But... b-but...” Twilight trembled.
Rainbow exhaled, then took a step forward.
Crkkk!
A shingle of wood fell down into the second story below. Nevertheless, Rainbow crawled forward, lifting one hoof after another.
Crkkk-crkkkk!
“Oh jeez...” Twilight covered her muzzle with trembling hooves. “Oh jeez oh jeez oh jeez—!”
“Could do without the paranoid soundtrack, thank you,” Rainbow hissed. She exhaled vaporously through clenched teeth as she marched forward. A savage crack formed in the ceiling behind her, shaping into a fractured “V.”
“Quicker,” Fluttershy insisted, gazing behind them at a silver dot as it approached the foot of the ridge, glinting. “Quicker!”
Cr-Crkkkk! More planks of wood fell beneath Rainbow Dash.
“Guhhhhhhh...” Pinkie had to grasp her tail to keep it from twitching.
“You're doing good, Rainbow!” Rarity said with a sweaty grin. “There's a support beam beneath you! And it would appear that it's supporting your weight—”
CRAKKKKK! The entire two-story shack shifted.
Rainbow froze in place, eyes wide. She looked down. The beam beneath her was bowing. Every shingle slid apart behind her.
“Buck it!” Twilight shouted.
“Run, darling!” Rarity shrieked as the shack gave way beneath her. “Run like a maniac!”
“Rrrrrrrrrghhh!” Rainbow desperately threw herself forward. Wind shifted past her ears as the vertical columns supporting the building finally gave way and—
Scrkkkkkkkkkkk!
Seraphimus' charcoal eyes blinked. Her armor rattled as she caught sight of a massive wooden structure completely spitting its support beams loose and careening down the side of the ridge...
...and towards her.
London Bridge is falling down...
See, this is why you can't find the Rainbow Rogue.
Worst possible situation? Check.
Best possible outcome? Check.
I know it shouldn't, but this situation cracks me up.
Holy crap, Talon, I thought you guys were supposed to be competent
Timber!
That devious Rainbow Rogue lured Seraphimus into a trap. Throwing a shack at that poor griffin. Dick move you monster.
I'm kinda hoping she has to choose to save Dash or watch her die. (Not really as Dash could have totally made it)
She needs a dose of the Dash, that always warms the frostiest hearts.
>Listening carefully for any sounds the Rogue makes.
>Hears sounds.
>Doesn't blame on Rogue
Logic
6823641 Timber?
6823668
Caught up!
Dear lord, I actually caught up to the ongoing series.
Welp, just three years to wait to know how the story ends.
Blessed are the Cheesemakers.
I picked up the here parrot not an hour ago, and now its dead.
Im a lumberjack and Im ok.
You know, I think Ive seen this episode somewhere.
As long as Dash jumped hard enough, she couldve used the shack as reaction mass, and as long as the downward path is decently aligned with fences and posts, she could try tuck and roll, and introduce Sonic SpinDash Boom to the prefectures.
Wonder if Ivory Prefecture has zebras. Someone to guide Dash on her journy, a pilot you might even say.
Feeling Lucky Rainbow Dash? Because this is quite the gamble that you have to make, though a necessary gamble.
I highly doubt it is going to do anything but spook her.
Aww, no shacksurfing after all :(. Oh well, Dash got away, and seraphimus is going to have one bad day
6823733
6823727 Welcome, bonjour, willkommen.
YES! HAHA!
Here we see the diligence of the Talon, hear sound, probably boulder
Aww crud! Dodge Seraphimus!
6823727 Добро пожаловать!
I am literally shaking right now, I'm so tense.
Seraphimus should be fast enough to dodge this even if caught a bit by surprise. But if it hits that is likely going to put her out of commission for a bit.
6823727 congratulations! Welcome!
Can't Dash use her wings at least to stay longer in the air when she jumps?
6826090
With only one functional wing, it would create an imbalance. Best case scenario, she'd fall over on her side (and on top of the injured wing, to boot).
And so Seraphimus is about to end her existence buried underneath a mountain of cymbals, airhorns and dying cats. Such cruel irony.
Let the first Annual Avalanche Surf Meet... begin!!!
Well, it's not a boxcar, but it'll do.
6826090 One is bandaged to her side. At best, she'd fall sideways. At worst, she'd tumble through the air uncontrollably.
Using a house as a weapon . . .
Yeah, it was unintentional, but if Rainbow knew, I can guarantee that'd be a story to tell.
6884069
Quite a few stories unless I Rarity was mistaken on the side of the house.
YES!! MEET YOUR END SERAPHIMUS!!
Here. Have a house.
Well that was quite some timing.
6823727
Trying to catch up myself now. Was hoping to do it before the end of the year but at the rate I'm going I don't think that'll happen.
deep breath
TIM-BEEEEER!