Three hundred years after the fall of Princess Luna, Equestria teeters on the brink of disaster. Bitter political infighting and power-hungry nobles threaten to tear the country apart in a bloody civil war, while in the south old enemies prepare to reclaim their ancient homeland from the ponies.

As Princess Celestia desperately strives to hold together her splintered nation, she sends a young pony on a quest to the northern lands that border Equestria in order to plead for aid against the threat of Grypha. This unlikely messenger is Rye Strudel, the flightless, magicless, half-breed son of a guard and a baker. Rye must do the impossible and unite the thanes of the north... for if he cannot, there may be no home to come back to.

Tempest gets roped into babysitting Flurry Heart during a visit to the Crystal Empire. It's not so bad. She can talk all she wants and Flurry's a good listener. Plus, it gets her away from the hustle and bustle of the Crystal Faire. In all, she expects a quiet night.

Then she spots a spider. And spiders need to die. By any means necessary.

The Crystal Palace will never be the same.

Written for the May 2020 Pairing Contest. Loosely inspired by, well, Kill it With Fire. Has a Spanish translation by SPANIARD KIWI.

Spike carries each of the most important ponies in his life home after a long day.

A commission-turned-gift for B_25

UPDATE: A Spanish language translation for Carry Me Home is now available, made by Spaniard Kiwi on his deviantart.

UPDATE (2024): Them's Writin' Words podcast did a wonderful review of this story. I appreciate all the thought and work put in to their critiques and all the kind words.

Certain aspects of the palace have been stable for a long time, and the longer that time has gone on, the harder they are to shift -- no matter how badly Luna might desire it. But one tapestry is undeniably ugly. It's been ugly for more than a thousand years. And so she's going to do what should have been done centuries ago and simply kick it out.

Inanimate objects have a way of returning to the scene of the crime.

(A stand-alone, no prior-reading-necessary part of the Triptych Continuum, which has its own TVTropes page and FIMFiction group: new members and trope edits are welcome. )

Now with author Patreon and Ko-Fi pages.

Dedicated to Bill Veeck