Jade, Hsi, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo strolled along the street outside Uncle's antique shop. It was the final stage of Jade's 'recovery' from the events in England, and despite the fillies' curiosity they'd abided by the directive not to quiz her on what had happened after they'd been herded away. They were also all walking despite preferences, just in case Jade found herself losing her balance or otherwise having issues with the balance between her mind and body. They were being so considerate that she was about to scream in frustration, and possibly hit someone.
"Look, can't you all just give me one minute to try and feel like myself without you all hovering?" she demanded finally. "I get that I'm not in the best of shapes, but yeesh!" Stepping away, she rolled her neck and shoulders to try and relax. "Only way it'd be worse is if it was the grownups..."
"Us keeping an eye on you like this means they aren't," Scootaloo pointed out, only to get a glare from Sweetie. "What? You really think she wouldn't figure it out on her own?"
"Shoulda known," Jade grumbled under her breath. Sighing, she shifted her focus. "Look, can we just...talk about something? Give me something to focus on other than everyone's concern for my well being. Anything going on at school I should be focusing on?"
"Well, the talent show is coming up-" Hsi Wu began carefully.
"Oh crap!" Jade gasped out aghast. "That's tomorrow, and I still don't have a talent picked out! I haven't even looked into how it's run now! What am I going to do?"
"Ya could ask yer boyfriend who's probably kept track a' those things for ya specifically cause he knows ya let those things slide?" Apple Bloom suggested slyly.
Jade blew her an irritated raspberry, but turned to Hsi as the fillies giggled. "Did you?" she asked hopefully.
"Yes," Hsi confirmed. "Even those details that others might overlook sharing that you need to know due to not remembering how things work in a magic-normal world."
Jade sighed in relief. "So...?" she prompted.
Hsi stared back at her for a time. "...oh, you wanted me to tell you?" he teased playfully.
"Seriously, Hsi?" Emeraude asked from Jade's shoulder. "You're really going to be like this now?"
"Of course I am," Hsi responded coyly. "I have to get her mind back to herself somehow. Good to see you manifesting again, though."
"Maybe he'd be more cooperative with a whip," Queen suggested somewhere between groggily and snidely, mostly manifest on Jade's other shoulder.
"Am I going to need to do that, Hsi?" Jade asked playfully, raising an eyebrow as she cocked her hips.
"If you like, Mistress," Hsi teased.
"I'm not your Mistress!"
"You're the one suggesting whipping me."
"HSI!"
The fillies continued to laugh at their antics. After a time, Hsi spoke more normally. "It's your basic talent show," he explained readily. "You mark down the talent you'll showcase on your entry form, filled out the day of the show. File it as a magical or a mundane talent, and magical talents are judged against your expected magical capabilities, as recorded in your school records."
"I'm guessing mine includes the fact I'm the Chosen One?" Jade asked dryly. When Hsi nodded, she sighed. "Guess I'll need to find a mundane talent to show, then, if I want a chance of getting a good prize."
"Well, that should be easy enough," Sweetie Belle suggested. "You've got all those past lives to draw on-"
"Even if they would let me use those skills for a school talent show, I wouldn't want to win like that," Jade pointed out dryly. "If I'm going to compete, I want it to be on my own abilities, not something inherited."
"So a talent a past life hasn't mastered," Hsi mused thoughtfully. "That's going to be tricky."
"You could do lion taming!" Sweetie Belle suggested helpfully.
"How would that work?" Jade demanded in confusion.
"Just stick a mane on Hsi!" Sweetie explained. "Then you just need the chair, right?"
Jade and Hsi both facepalmed as the fillies laughed. Jade blew her bangs out of her eyes. "Well, better than trying to shape change Ruby and train her," she offered ruefully. "Any other ideas?"
"We could take our feline form and dance," Queen suggested wickedly, shaking her hips in a suggestive manner to demonstrate her meaning.
"Jade! Is! TWELVE!" Emeraude snapped back, her eyes blazing.
"You knew how to belly dance when you were twelve," Queen pointed out teasingly.
"Wait, what?" Jade and Hsi both demanded in shock.
"It was for exercise!" Emeraude snapped back, her cheeks bright red.
"Well I never said we should take our clothes off first," Queen offered playfully. "You're the one who went there."
With a scream of inarticulate fury, Emeraude lunged for Queen as they began to tussle back and forth over Jade's shoulders, tearing at each other.
Jade sighed ruefully. "Pity I can't just use a spell to make you two visible," she groaned. "My talent could be the world's most embarrassing comedy routine."
"Uh...this may seem like an obvious suggestion," Apple Bloom spoke up, "but...wut about a martial arts demonstration? Ah mean, ya are still givin' those informal lessons at school durin' recess."
Jade blinked as she thought over that. "...call that Plan B," she allowed. "A fall back if we can't find anything the school hasn't already seen."
"Pretty sure you could spice it up a bit and make it really impressive," Hsi observed calmly. "Got a few tricks along those lines I could share easily."
"How about ventriloquism?" Scootaloo offered helpfully as she stared at a rather creepy looking monkey puppet in a shop window they were passing. "That Dunham fellow's hilarious, and he doesn't even have any magic! Maybe you could do something like that?"
The whole group turned to look at the puppet, carefully examining it. It was dressed in bright green, had dark red hair slicked back in spikes, and had a rather disturbing face exquisitely carved with movable eyebrows, along with a huge grin filled with sharp teeth. "So...you want me to try throwing my voice into an evil monkey puppet?" Jade asked flatly.
"I'm not picking up any magic in it whatsoever," Hsi pointed out calmly. "Should be perfectly safe."
"...feels a little too convenient," Jade murmured before glancing up at the name of the shop.
Movere Autem Insidiamini
"...any of you read Latin?" she asked curiously.
"Nope," Apple Bloom offered apologetically.
"Not really," Sweetie Belle allowed.
"Nope!" Scootaloo declared eagerly.
"Despite what most fiction would tell you, Latin has actually very little place in magic usage," Hsi apologized.
"Well, that's reassuring!" Jade declared as she stepped into the shop to buy the puppet, certain it would be perfectly harmless.
The monkey king and a talent show? This is going to be an... interesting combination
Movere Autem Insidiamini...
Move to wait?
What dose that mean?
OH NO! IT'S HIM!
Good to know Jeff Dunham exists in this world.
This could turn out either very good or very bad... depending on how the Monkey King reacts.
She would be WRONG.
9184103
Latin has no set linear structure, so it could just as easily be the other way around.
9184103
Looking at the words individually, "movere" translates as "move", "insidiamini" as "plot", and "autem" is a multipurpose conjunction that can mean "moreover" or "however" (or variations on those themes). I suspect "Movere Autem Insidiamini" is being treated by Google translate as an idiomatic phrase when it comes up with "move to wait" - particularly since changing the capitalisation gives different translations - including "move to betray" and "{he} move{s} the plot" though I suspect "plot" in the latter is more "conspiracy" than "events of a work of fiction"...
Disclaimer: I'm not a linguist, and have no formal training in Latin - I just know some of the ways computers can give bad answers...
9184107
Oh thank God I'm not the only one enjoying that part.
Well, Movere Autem Insidiamini translates to Move to Wait, but change Autem to Autim and you get Move to Attend Plot. Whatever that shop is, it probably deals in conspiracies.
Is it bad that I'm really hoping this some how results in Ron and his Mystical Monkey Power showing up?
Funniest part: the comments so far.
"Move to Plot."
Or:
"To Move the Plot"
More colloquially said as "The Plot Device"
Love the Jeff Dunham reference. And I totally know the feeling of the hovering parents/friends/caretakers.
And the image of Emeraude and Queen fighting on Jade's shoulder made me laugh.
9184143
I don't really remember the Monkey King arc, but given those translations, my guess is it roughly translates to 'to move the plot.' As in, 'this is just here to move the plot forward.'
Chapter One Hundred Ninety-Four
"Bad Day"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 48
"I'm not his/your Mistress!"
Chapter Count: 1
Total Count: 12
Pretty sure Jade has a talent for getting into sticky situations. Though not sure if shouldering the tension between Emeraude and Queen should count as one. Hsi most likely doesn't like Sweetie's idea because he has to manely do the lion's share of the work if they agreed to it.
Oh boy, here we go.
*groans* Oh no. Not him. *rubs temples* How do you get into these messes, Jade?
9184127
Yes, considering (1) the world where magic is norm and (2) who else is in the same school as Jade... (already mentioned in previous chapters)
Ehh, at least that doll would probably only manifest an aspect of her insanity. At least it isn't a Chucky doll.
So...Who's gonna be the one to pull the merry ape's leg?
I like that you referenced Jeff Dunham.
9184219
ere we go ere we go waaaaaaaaaaaaagh!
9184423
the next few chapters are going to be fun. I wonder if Jackie will be the one to pull the puppet’s leg like in the original, or if someone else is going to do it.
I wonder… did any member of the Chan clan (aside from possibly Hsi) realize what Alucard spelled backwards is, and that they fought alongside the grand daddy of all vampires.
Cause it would be a little funny if the fillies realized that while the humans did not. XD
9184103
You’ll see.
… the one day I forget to check and My favorite Arthor updates.... Ahh well better late then never.
Welp, we're in trouble.
Was wondering when the Monkey King would make his appearance. Now they just need Discord to show up and make it a contest of who can annoy Jackie the most.
Regardless of the lack of detectable magic, that is clearly an evil puppet and this is a bad idea.
YOU IDIOTS.
9184816
I'm hoping Lord Monty Fiske and Ron Stoppable show up in this arc.
Lord Fiske was a highly respected, wealthy, and world famous explorer/archeologist in KP. He was driven insane in his pursuit of Tai Shing Pek Kwar and the various monkey-themed magical artifacts associated with mystical monkey powers, but in a world where magic is normal he could have a very different life.
He could very well be an associate of both Jackie Chan (both are explorers and archeologists, so they either know of each other or are their paths have crossed in the past) and Valmont (Fiske also did a ton of highly questionable and illegal prior to his first arrest and more than likely had to do business with the dark hand to accomplish a couple of them).
Fiske could also know quite a bit about the true history of Sun Wukong, why he ended up trapped as a mystical puppet, and how to defeat him without forcing Uncle to swallow his pride and buy the answer from his rival antiques shop owner. Or he could quite possibly be the "master mind" behind this whole scheme in an attempt to get his hands on the Monkey Talisman. Either would be hilarious.
As for Ron Stoppable, there could be any one of a billion things which could have brought him, Kim, and Rufus to San Francisco. Even a mission from Sonata wanting Kim and Ron to deliver her Nacos from Bueno Nacho. Why Nacos? Well the city of San Francisco doesn't have them anymore after Valmont and the chain's corporate owner, Señor Senior, Senior (I am making that up, but it makes too much sense), had a falling out after SSS fought with and lost to an American Teenager (Kim).
Actually it would be hilarious if SSS was also in San Francisco so he could try to Blackmail Valmont into sponsoring him for re-admittance into the Billionaire's Club. For you see, SSS has come across footage, footage which he is the sole owner of (and has multiple copies to), showing Valmont losing badly to an elementary school girl and her three cousins. Losing to a cheerleader is one thing, but losing to a preteen? Just imagine the scandal that would create if word were to get back to the other billionaires in the club.
SSS would also be completely aware that Valmont is the new Demon Sorcerer of Light, and has several contingency plans in place to have that video sent out should he not return to his private island after visiting Valmont's office within 72 hours. Valmont would either be impressed with SSS, or tell him that all of this attempted blackmail was unnecessary since he's already sponsoring him for re-admittance into the club. Why, well Valmont realized a few things, namely that he was overly harsh on SSS, since going up against The Chan Clan. Or possibly both.
In any event, I'm really hoping for a lot of KP here since it just makes too much since not to do.
Oh no... she said it! well, she thought it, but it's the thought that counts.
Explain
Oh, they found Chris Griffin's evil monkey!
Perfectly harmless, ordinary non-magical ventriloquist dummy= OH BOY! This can only end badly
9185226
Going to assume it's either so full of magic it goes off Hsi' radar...
Ooooorr the doll is kept without magic to prevent the Monkey King coming to life.
Or just high-level illusion magic making Hsi think it isn't magic.
OH HECK YEE!!!
Wait. If Jackie is turned into a dummy... I hope Viper doesn’t enjoy her new toy in the way I am thinking. However, I am fine with Sheriff Woody Chan.
“Bad day! That’s not karate, that is kick boxing with style!”
I got something in mind with old monkey shine king.
His: (venom in voice) well hello monkey king.
M.K: that's me & I'm gla- ... (goes pail) oh..... hi His. heh.... heh......
His: it's been a wile. about 4'000 years to be exact. & I still owe you for the stunt you pulled that got me in great trouble.
jacky: don't start any thing in here!!! you might brake something of value!!!!
Chapter One Hundred Ninety Four
"Aiyah!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 50
"One More Thing!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 86
9184201
Theeere we go. my money's on that one.
Is this the same mysterious store selling questionable magical crap from the Discworld book Soul Music, or the Devil's shop from Rick and Morty where you don't pay for anything...with money mwuahaahaaahaaahaaa!?
that puppet will be in some much hot water if it tries anything
9185641
MK”I’m the Monkey King! No one tells me what to do!”
S:”Pecking Order”
MK:” 1ST RULE OF POPO’S TRAINING!!”
9186499
Popo: what was that maggot?
...Why do I get the feeling that this will only end in disaster?
9187113
Because if I remember from the show correctly, that is the same monkey puppet that became real when Jackie pulled it’s leg and switched places with it and had to be brought back to life by the Rat Talisman, leading to the second “Don’t look in the mirror” incident by the way, and there is a possibility that if Jade pulls the leg this time not only would it be back, her magic power as the Chosen One will most likely be in its hands.
9187113
Pattern Recognition?
Suspicious...
Hmm... *Goes to google translate* Move to wait? *glances at other comments* ...Oh, "to move the plot". That makes more sense. My knowledge of Jackie Chan is admittedly rusty, but I take it this is probably going to end in a mess?
That's a yes, then. Carry on.
9187113
The Genre-Savvy is strong in this one.
I have a feeling that Mythril Moth not only follows this story, but likes it a lot. It's the only reason I can think of as why his recent "Out Of Context Screen Shot Theater" is suddenly based on this episode and not a pony one.
Yay! Jeff Dunham reference!
Can’t decide if I should call the monkey puppet on being either Monkey King or Hak Foo got puppetised.
9206496
interesting, but what does this have to do with anything?
9207932
Well, I did say I was paraphrasing.