Equestria Divided: The Pink Samurai

by The Kobold Necromancer

First published

Pinkie Pie is brought to Equestria Divided, an alternate universe where the Mane 6 have turned against each other, warping Equestria into a nightmarish war zone. For her new friends, Pinkie fights against the odds as the Pink Samurai.

There is a universe out there titled Equestria Divided. It is aptly named, as the Mane 6, the former Elements of Harmony, now wage war for total domination of Equestria. Battling for a world that has lost Celestia and Luna, each fights for what they believe is right, each will go to extremes. How and why this happened, is not completely known, but what is sure is that something needs to happen to stop this war, before everypony, every being, is destroyed by it.

That's where Pinkie Pie, from another universe, comes in. Brought by mysterious forces, the party pony is very suddenly imbedded in the middle of this war-torn world, and must learn to adjust to a violent life to survive, and thrive. She will have to endure to fighting with lethal force, and the shock that it entails,while partly deluding herself that she has somehow wound up in some complex game.

So what caused the splitting of Equestria Divided? What are the plans of the five Houses, and the mysterious Cult of Laughter? How can Pinkie Pie keep up with the war, the loss and pain, and having to keep her new friends (who are still technically her friends of old) safe? The only way to possibly do that, is to keep calm, party on, and carry a few badflank weapons for fending off evil forces. And they range from the trotting dead, to warmongering pegasi troops, to pyromaniac unicorns, to... Celestia knows what!

With what humor she can muster, to keep her pony self sane, she realizes this isn't going to be easy. But it must be done. So you're invited to watch as events unfold, in one big spectacle after another, as a warrior blossoms!

Equestria Divided: The Pink Samurai. She's here to fight Houses and the Cult, Pinkie Pie Samurai Style!


This is inspired by the incredibly creative PoorYorickDA on DeviantArt (Equestria Divided folder Here). Go check him out, read his journals, and tell him how awesome he is. I have his permission for writing this, and I hope he enjoys it as much as I enjoy writing it.

The artwork (a current work-in-progress) is done by the incredibly talented CuttieArtGirl on Deviant Art. Her work is amazing, detailed, darling, and I could go on about it. She is NOT a Pegasister, however, so please don't ask her about MLP, or request them. Still, go to her and tell her how awesome she is!

(Consider this story to be what would happen if we could make a game out of this and novelize it.)

Prologue Part 1 - The Discovery of the Samurai

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THE SEARCH CONTINUES.

I NEED TO FIND HER, OR HIM… IN WHATEVER FORM IT MAY BE…

ONE THAT IS NOT TOO PEACEFUL, NOR TOO BLOODTHIRSTY.

I MUST FIND HER, TIME IS RUNNING OUT.

THE JESTER IS SETTING THE STAGE.

THE DRAGOON IS ERADICATING.

THE GEM IS CUTTING INTO THE HEART.

THE STAR IS TEARING ASUNDER.

THE THUNDER IS SHAFTING LIFE.

THE FOREST IS STRANGLING.

IT CANNOT GO ON LIKE THIS FOR MUCH LONGER, OR ALL WE KNOW, ALL WE LOVE IS LOST.

SO MANY I HAVE CHECKED, SO MANY I WILL SEARCH THROUGH…

UNTIL I FIND THE ONE WHO CAN SAVE US ALL...

THE PINK SAMURAI.


The definition of rebel in Mareiam-Webster is "opposing or taking arms against a government or ruler."

Therefore, no matter how wild Pinkie Pie was, she was not truly a rebel. When she was just being Pinkie, she wasn't opposing or taking up arms against any kind of authority. Some would argue that she rebelled against the laws of physics or the law of gravity, but Pinkie more or less played with them rather than rebelled.

Somepony had once told Pinkie Pie that every pony, every being, is special. Everypony has lived every day of their lives, experienced new and old things every second they were awake, had dreams and hopes and ideas. Thus, everypony was special, and the mauve mare had taken that to heart.

Violence would never be called for in this world of Equestria. There were no wars, no major conflicts. The worst was when diamond dogs tried out Mareiam-Webster's definition of rebel, and had to receive a smacking. Pinkie Pie thus never had any call to be "rebellious," as she had no reason to be violent in such a happy world.

That being said, her friends were not one hundred percent sure of that at the moment as Pinkie Pie stared them down with enough intensity to bore holes right to the back of their heads.

"No one," she snapped, "is to embarrass my sister when we go into this concert! You understand me, girls?"

"Why would we," Twilight Sparkle tried to reason, "want to humiliate your sister-"

"I AM ASKING THE QUESTIONS HERE, AS WELL AS MAKING LOUD, BOOMING ORDERS!" Pinkie raised up on her forelegs, her hind legs bent at the knees so she could pump her fists up at the sky. "DO NOT FORCE ME TO KEEP SHOUTING, AS IF I ACCIDENTALLY HIT THE CAPS LOCK KEY AND HAVE NOT YET CORRECTED IT!"

AS TWILight tried desperately to figure out what on Equestria meant by this, Applejack decided to intervene. "Pinkie, we all promise not to embarrass yur sister. We'll watch her performance with the utmost respect."

This answer worked rather well, as Pinkie's roaring rampage of bombastic ordering melted into her smiling at Applejack. As the farm pony wondered how that worked so easily, a small scoff could be heard amid the small group.

"Yeah, you're not going to have problems with me," Rainbow Dash said. The pegasus was glancing around the lobby of the theater, hoping they had snacks. "After all, I'll be asleep by the second piece of classical music."

"You will NOT snore during my sister's orchestra, Dashie," Pinkie exclaimed, getting right in Rainbow's face, so much so that her nose honked against her friend's.

As Applejack tried to calm down the apprehensive Pinkie, the others double-checked their tickets. The theater was rather large, normally for grand plays and performances, but tonight, it was for classical music; most of them did not want to miss it.

Pinkie's older sister, a few days ago, had sent them seven tickets for the large performance in Canterlot. While the others were rather shocked that said sister of Pinkie Pie was the famous musician mare Octavia, Pinkie was ecstatic. She was overjoyed to not only see her sister again, but for her best friends to see her sister play.

Rarity was probably the most thrilled, checking the ticket once more, admiring how great the seat was. She had worn one of her best dresses for this occasion, catching the attention of many stallions, and some mares. She didn't mind the attention, of course, but Pinkie Pie was giving her suspicious stares, as if non-verbally accusing her of trying to overshadow her older sister with her fancy dress.

"Darling," Rarity said, also joining into the confrontation of Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash, "please calm down. Now we all are excited to be here, and we all will make sure to be at our utmost best. Right, Rainbow Dash?"

Of the seven in their main group, Rainbow Dash was the only one who had any objections to attending a classical concert. Even Spike was interested, as he would head it for hours during Twilight's study periods, and practically was being raised with the music. Thus the prismatic tomcolt was the odd-pony out on not being thrilled over this.

"Look, I'm not going to do anything crazy, like yell fire," Dash assured Pinkie. She huffed and rolled her eyes. "I have a little more class than that."

Spike, walking next to Twilight, rolled his own emerald eyes underneath the dapper hat Rarity had chosen for him. "You tried to pawn off your ticket to Cloud Kicker yesterday."

"What? Who told you that?"

"Fluttershy."

Rainbow glared at Fluttershy, who squeaked and practically hid behind Spike. "Well, I, um, had to make sure you didn't try to skip out on this, as Pinkie's very excited we all go."

"And what, you told Spike so that there'd be a witness or something? Sheesh, you all are ganging up on me."

"Rainbow Dashie Dash Dashers," Pinkie snapped, up in Dashie Dasher's face again. "You will be good during my sister's performance! Got that?"

"I got it, I got it! Now can I get some popcorn or something?"

"They don't serve popcorn at classical orchestras, Dash," Twilight informed her.

Dash groaned, face-hoofing and ignoring the stares from passerby ponies. "This is just way too posh for me. Seriously, I feel underdressed even in this fancy dress Rarity made for me to make me wear!"

She gestured at herself, her dark blue dress rustling around by the moment. Pinkie continued to frown at her friend, and hissed, "We all dressed up nice because Tavi deserves the best kind of audience. Now for the final time, Dashie, be good to my sister. Pi-"

"Yeah, yeah, I Pinkie Promise and all that. You made me do it three times."

"Don't make me have to make you triple-dog Pinkie Promise you, Dashie! No embarrassing Tavi!"

The seven entered into the theater, shuffling through the crowd of posh ponies, trying to find their seats. Rarity kept stopping to make chitchat with Canterlot ponies she knew, only for Pinkie to yank her away to hurry over to their seats.

The girls, and Spike, had rarely ever seen Pinkie like this. They knew she wasn't aggressive, for the most part, and they had chalked it up to this being family and good impressions. It was the only reason they could think of as to why Pinkie would give Fluttershy a stare that would rival the animal tender's.

"Flutters, I just want you to promise me you won't do any of that wild cheering of yours!"

"Of… of course, Pinkie. I'll keep it very modest."

"Thank you, Flutters. And Dashie? No snoring if you do fall asleep."

"Hay, if I do fall asleep, how can I help-"

"RD, stop provoking her, daggnabbit," Applejack hissed. "Just smile and nod for once!"

"Yeah," Pinkie interjected, "listen to AJ, RD? Kay-kay?"

When they finally found their seats, the group of seven settled in. Pinkie kept shushing them, even though the show had not begun, and they weren't being particularly loud either. Applejack adjusting her squeaky seat got her a loud shushing from Pinkie.

"She must really like her sister," Spike muttered to Twilight. "Have we ever met her, by the way?"

"No, I don't believe so, but Pinkie says we will after the performance," Twilight said.

"Yeah, four hours later," Spike muttered, crossing his arms. He sighed and added, "I like classical as much as the next dragon, Twilight… well, maybe a little more, but I don't know if I can sit still listening to it for that long."

Twilight smiled at the baby dragon, then used her magic to pull a candy from Bonbon's shop from her dress's pocket. "Treat for the wait?" she asked him, and he nodded.

When she unwrapped the treat, the crinkle noise alerted Pinkie, who shushed them. She also almost snatched the candy, if Twilight hadn't been fast enough to pull it away.

Rarity hummed as she adjusted her dress, and Pinkie shushed her. Dash yawned, she was shushed. Fluttershy coughed, Pinkie almost alerted the whole theater with her desperate shushing.

When the lights went down, Pinkie squealed in delight under her breath. She appeared ready to explode, her grin as wide as Pinkie-possible. The others, glad that the shushing was over, watched as a well-dressed pony walked center-stage.

"Gentlecolts and mare ladies," he said a with a deep, sophisticated voice, the kind that made Rarity swoon, "it is my great delight to introduce you to our entertainment for the evening.

"This band of professional classical musicians have prepared you an enchanting night. As there has been a bit of a dearth of the fine arts in this day and age, it's my utmost pleasure to tell you that you all could not find five greater musicians in the art.

"On the piano is Frederic Horseshoepin." He gestured to the side of the stage, where a tan stallion with a pure white mane entered with a distinct flair to his step. The audience applauded politely, as the piano was gently pushed on the stage for Frederic.

"On the harp is Parish Nadermane." A purple stallion with a straight, blue mane walked onstage, giving the audience a polite bow. He waited for his harp to be rolled onstage before taking a seat on the stool that was brought for him.

"On the violins are Symphony and Concerto." A pair of ponies trotted onstage, also politely bowing. The mare sported a yellow coat and a dark purple mane that matched Rarity's in elegance, and the stallion had matching brown coat and mane.

"And last, we have the leader to our band," the host said, "we have Octavia on the cello."

The gray pony with an ebony mane stepped out onstage, to applause slightly louder than the previous ponies. She smiled and bowed gracefully to the audience, then to the host. When her cello was brought out for her, she hoisted herself up on her hind legs. As she bowed again to the audience, she prepared to speak.

"THAT'S MY BIG SISTER, EVERYPONY!!"

Octavia blinked in shock, then noticed the commotion near the front of the audience. Pinkie Pie, having held in her pride and joy and love for her big sister, hadn't been able to contain her excitement any long. She was now being restrained by five other ponies and a baby dragon, as other audience members glared at the interruption.

The audience weren't the only ones, as Octavia's band members were glaring first at the shouting mare, then at Octavia herself. She merely smiled at them, and said quietly, "That… would be my little sister."


"You seriously want to keep this up?"
"Maybe we should try taking another leg. They usually talk when we take another leg."
"Alright, but it's my turn, you got the… oh!"

The pony strapped down to the wooden table could barely see the being that had walked into the room. This was mostly due to the bruising around her eyes, the blood that had collected there and made her vision blurry.
All the pony knew was that her captives seemed rather afraid, she could smell their fear. This did not bode well for the now three-legged pony.
"Results?" the pink pony asked, her soulless voice sending a chill down the spines of all those in the room.
The first torturer standing next to the table nervously shuffled her hooves. "Um, Miss Laughing Mare… The? Is it Miss or The? I never was told-"
"Do not concern yourself with titles, we are all equal here." The bells on the pink pony's jester cap jingled as she swished her head towards the captive pony. "Even those who we require information from, in worst possible ways."
"Alrighty then! Well, this wildling pony ain't talking. She just snaps and snarls," the first pony said, gesturing wildly with the bloody sickle she was holding. The second pony had to dodge a particularly wide swipe, frowning at her fellow torturer.
"Yeah, either Lady Fluttershy is training these feral ponies to be better at pain toleration than we would think," the second one said, rubbing a hoof through her white mane, or as white as it could be with blood splattered all over it, "or she just don't know anything."
The wildling pony snarled and muttered, "Even if I did, I wouldn't talk. Not even in death, cultist scum!"
The first torturer shook her head, tsk-tsking behind the mask she was wearing. "Really? That's so cliché."
"We take your right foreleg, your ear, several of your teeth, hit you, and yet," the second torturer said, "you no talk. Why you no talk?"
As if to agree with this, the first cultist torturer swung her sickle down at the wildling pony, slashing her flank. The vines the pony wore around her sides did nothing but soak up the blood from the wound, and she ground her teeth in the agony. She had thought she could last until she bled out, but that mercy hadn't happened.
"What should we do, O' Laughing Mare?" the first torturer asked.
"You cannot squeeze blood from a stone that has nothing to bleed," the Laughing Mare stated.
She walked in front of the wildling pony, observing the nature-dwelling mare face-to-face. Though having lived a feral life, the wildling pony was not ready for what she saw.
The Laughing Mare's eyes were hollow, save for a sadistic, red glow that were pupils in the abyss sockets. The pink coated pony's lips were gone, scars curving upwards into a permanent smile; it was painful to see, especially up close.
When the cultist leader raised a hoof to lift up the captive pony's head, the wildling pony saw the burns and scars on her legs. Terrible scars that should have meant death, including the ones that could be smelt but not seen underneath that dried blood red-and-white checkered jester costume the pink pony was wearing.
Again, the jester hat bells jingled when The Laughing Mare stared down into the wildling pony's eyes. "A stone that cannot bleedy-weedy is a rock. A rock must be pulverized to make your way around."
"Meaning?" the second torturer asked.
"… Killy-willy."
"Duh," the first one scoffed at the second, "I knew that!"
The bloodstained sickle swung down in a killer arc, impaling deep into the wildling pony's head. She let out a growling cry, then a whimper as blood oozed down her head. Though she closed her eyes in death's quick embrace, the body refused to stop twitching violently.
"Want me to make her stump wriggle around?" the first torturer asked. "I think I got the right movement in the brain to cause it to happen."
"Will you stop already?"
"Hey, Miss Laughing Mare, I bet I could get this one as well to piss itself after death! Wanna see?"
"The pleasures of death will have to wait, we must check the second stone."
"Oki-doki," the first torturer said cheerfully. "Just me, or you want Crazy Legs here too?"
"Both presences would be appreciated, doki-loki."
As the two followed The Laughing Mare, Crazy Legs elbowed the first torturer. "Look, I know you want to get ahead here, but we kind of failed on that prisoner; this isn't something to be proud of."
"We performed wickedly, and provided another one of the Laughing Dead army. I don't know what cult you joined, but those are results here."
"Just keep pushing, Crimson Sickle, I dare you. We'll see who gets the last laugh here."
The three entered another room in the torture hall, screams of agony and wild laughter echoing down like some kind of antechamber music. This room had an earth pony strapped down, gasping for air. The torturer bowed to The Laughing Mare, then blew a raspberry at her leader; the latter motion was returned.
"Well, Miss Laughing Mare," the raspberry blowing stallion said, lifting up his happy-sad mask to look his leader in the eye sockets, "I have some great news, given to us by my friend here."
He gleefully pat the bloody stump of the earth pony's foreleg, making him cry out in pain. The pony was a soldier, as not every injury was from the torture. Though his missing eye, ear, and tail were not from battle. Blood and bile stained his mouth, and he appeared ready to die any moment.
"My friend has told me that House Earthborn is indeed planning to make a movement on the area where the others have gathered," the torturer continued. "He has been brave, very brave, but I'm afraid I had to show him just how funny it is when I don't get the information needed."
"You have performed quite well, Slashen Hack."
The Laughing Mare pat the torturer's shoulder, then his victim's. "House Earthborn still has the kind of tenacity earth ponies are made of. You do my kind proud, fallen knight."
The earth pony, despite the agony, sneered at her. "We are Equestria, you are death. We are nothing like you, rotting corpse!"
"You might want to watch it," Crimson Sickle shot. "The Laughing Mare can pull your heart out and show it to you before you die!"
"About that…"
The Laughing Mare turned to Crimson Sickle and Crazy Legs, shaking her head. The pupil glow in her eyes was glowing brighter. "Slashen Hack is one of many who produced results. Results that will help us when the time comes. But you two, no results.
"Though you two have provided a single corpse for my army's numbers," she continued, not noticing or caring how much the two ponies were shaking in fear, "I need at least one more for… certain purposes. The Cult of Laughter needs to make its stand in this combat, and we cannot be party poopers for this major party, can we?
"Do we have a volunteer for the fun mission?"
The mare and stallion cultists exchanged glances. Their teeth chattering so hard in their terror, they couldn't make any words out. It should have been excitement for them, this should have been an honor…
… but The Laughing Mare had a way of making even those who followed the way of laughter to stop laughing.
"Crazy Legs volunteers," Crimson Sickle exclaimed, pointing a hoof at her colleague. "He wants to fight!"
"Why you!" was all Crazy Legs could say, his legs becoming jelly under him, his bottom jaw failing to provide words as it was working too hard to keep him from throwing up.
"Thank you for volunteering."
The Laughing Mare shot her hoof forward, striking Crimson Sickle in the chest. The torturer fell back on her hindquarters, but was kept upright by the claws emerging from the Laughing Mare's hoof.
The claws ripped into Crimson Sickle's chest, and she felt it encircle her heart. Her very heart beat against them a couple times in her leader's grasp. Then a sickening ripping sound followed.
The Laughing Mare's cackle filled the room as she held the still beating heart upwards. Slashen Hack's delighted guffaws followed, next was Crazy's Legs first relieved then equally sadistic laughter. The three cackled as Crimson Sickle's eyes rolled up in her head.
Her last thoughts were on how, even as she died, this wasn't going to be the end for her.
Insane laughter rolled throughout the halls and rooms, and all members of the cult followed suit. Their leader was amused, and thus were they too.
Such is the way of the Cult of Laughter. Everything was funny, as it was the only way to keep them from screaming over how cruel the world had become.


Rainbow Dash let out a quiet, but audible, sigh as the band finished another classical piece. The audience was clapping with great approval, and she truly felt like the oddball out. Even Pinkie Pie, who Rainbow would have sworn would be asleep listening to classical music, was applauding with much gusto.

Octavia's presence onstage was the only thing keeping the prismatic maned pegasus from dozing off. The earth pony's smoldering look and poise were almost like a model rather than a musician.

"And heck, I'm straight," she mused mentally, smirking a little. "Pinkie's sister does have something going for her, even if that's not my thing. I wonder… if Octavia is the kind for-"

"For the next song," Octavia spoke to the audience, adjusting her pink bow tie, "I would like you all to think of Equestria's grand team of the Wonderbolts."

Rainbow's half-closed eyes shot open as if performing a stunt by said team. "Your sister knows about them?" she asked Pinkie, who hushed her frantically.

"I am sure some of you have seen the Wonderbolts perform, or at least heard of them," Octavia continued. "The beauty, elegance, and dare I say, power that they exhibit is breathtaking.

"Therefore, I'd like to request something a little odd, if you will trust me. Close your eyes during this next piece. To the pegasi in the audience, imagine flying through the sky.

"To the non-pegasi, imagine watching the elegance of flight, the freedom and passion of the pegasi you know. And enjoy this next piece, as it is one we like to play for Wonderbolt performances."

Octavia started to play, her band following suit. Rainbow Dash went along with her suggestion, and soon enough, could imagine herself up in the air.

"Feels like I'm soaring right now," she thought, leading her rainbow-topped head back and smiling. "Wow… I remember this at the last Wonderbolts' performance. This is classical? Ponies above, it's amazing."

She continued to listen to the music with her eyes closed, spreading her wings to feel it even closer (nearly hitting Twilight and Fluttershy with them). If ever she wanted a theme for joining the Wonderbolts, this would be it.

With the most critical of the bunch now on the side of classical, the rest of the concert passed by with rapt attention. At the end, when the audience broke out into applause, Pinkie sat up as high as she could and clopped her hooves together with much gusto. Her friends joined in doing this, and thus the audience followed suit.

The standing ovation last a good while before the band left the stage. As the ponies filed out of the theater, the chatter was positive among the audience members.

"Simply a dreamy performance! I felt like I was floating a few times."

"Indeed, they are the most talented bunch of ponies! Shame classical is becoming under-appreciated."

"What was up with that rather loud pony at the start?"

"Family pride, I would wager. I don't know if I approve such rash behavior, but if I had a sister that played that well, I might bally lose my calm if she took center stage."

"Oh dear, you're too funny."

The group of seven found themselves in the lobby, where Pinkie Pie said Octavia would join them after the performance. As they waited, Rainbow Dash stretched her wings and hovered around the lofty lobby.

"Gotta say, Pinks, that was a lot better than I thought it would be," she said. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna be rushing out to get classical records, but this was a lot of fun."

"Darling, you must tell us more about Octavia," Rarity insisted. "I mean, you have a famous sister in Canterlot, and you never told us."

"Tavi tours a lot, so she doesn't really live in Canterlot," Pinkie explained. "Plus, nowadays, her band is not having the best of luck with booking concerts, because pop music is all the rage."

"That's a shame," Dash said, "but hey, I'm all for rock. If you listen to too much classical, you could officially become posh; it's science."

"It is not," Twilight replied, frowning at her.

"Oh it is too. I mean, I loved the concert, Pinkie, but if I listened to another hour, I might have to wear eyeliner like Rarity."

"If you do, I would suggest a light shade of purple," Octavia suggested as she walked up from behind Rainbow Dash, startling the pegasus. "It would suit your coat and mane very well."

"Tavi-Lavi," Pinkie cheered, rushing over to glomp her sister. The gray pony obviously had experience with this, because she positioned herself so that Pinkie did not knock her over in the embrace. She smiled as she hugged her sister back.

"You know I always hated that nickname, Pinkamena."

"Eww, you know I don't go by that anymore! Keep that up, I'll call you by your original name too!"

"You wouldn't dare!"

Octavia wisely shoved a hoof in Pinkie's mouth as she let out Tavi's original name ("Gmmrmeemh!"). After removing the hoof from that smiling mouth, she smiled at her sisters' friends. "Well, my sister has written me so much about you all, I feel as if I know you all already."

"Darling, you put on a spectacular performance," Rarity gushed. "We enjoyed every minute!"

"Oh yes, very well done," Fluttershy agreed. "Your band is really good! You must practice a lot."

"Thank you all, you're being far too kind," she said. Her voice was like her musical talent, smooth and silky. The more she spoke, the harder it was for the group to believe she was Pinkie's sister.

"Why don't we head out for dinner?" Octavia suggested. "It'll be on me."

"Darling, we couldn't ask you that," Rarity insisted. "Why, your sister alone would cost a great deal to take out at a Canterlotean restaurant."

"Hey! … Wait yeah, that's true," Pinkie admitted.

"It's okay, I know of a good place to eat that's not too expensive," the musician said, holding her hoof up to Rarity to insist no more arguments. "I hope you all like cauliflower, they specialize in that as well as other vegetable meals."

"That sounds delicious," Twilight said cheerfully.

"Classical music, green foods," Rainbow said with a sigh. "You all are plotting to make me some kind of posh pony, aren't you? Do I have to learn to keep my chin up as I walk?"

The prismatic pegasus practiced this walk, and crashed into the wall. As Applejack helped her back up, Octavia and the others had to resist laughing. "You didn't tell me Rainbow Dash," Tavi said to her sister, "was so humorous."

"Oh, she gets a little loopy when she is caged up in a building for a while. She can be a silly-filly like that."

"Right, I see. Now you're okay with cauliflower, right Pinkie? I remember it wasn't your favorite back at home."

"I'll manage."

"Good, because they also have red velvet cupcakes for dessert."

One could practically hear Pinkie's blue eyes widen in excitement. "Oh YAY! Take me wherever this blessed restaurant is, you could replace my head with a cauliflower for a red velvet cupcake!"

The group of eight headed over to the restaurant, where, thanks to Octavia's fame (and maybe a little eye flutter at the maitre d'), they had a nice table outside. At first, some of them were confused why Octavia picked an outside table; however, as Dash was stretching and hovering around a lot, letting out pent-up energy for being stuck inside so long, they realized what the musician had done.

The day carried on with rather pleasant conversation, and a surprisingly hushed Pinkie let her friends and sister converse. Octavia was intent on learning more about her sister's friends, and thus insisted they talk about themselves.

Applejack told of her farm and family. Fluttershy told her about her animal friends, and she, as was the norm for her, talked openly as if cured of bashfulness when it came to animals. Rarity gushed about her business and fashion, insisting that she show Octavia some of her work one day so as to make the musician look her best on-stage.

Twilight and Spike had a few things to mention about Ponyville and home, but they mostly talked to Octavia about Canterlot. As the musician spent most of her time in the large city, it was something they had in common.

And then, Rainbow Dash talked about herself. This lasted until dessert, and then some.

"And of course, when I do join the Wonderbolts, I aim to be leader by the end of my first year with them," Dash boldly stated with a proud smile. Octavia nodded politely as she sipped her tea. Dash's friends all rolled their eyes, except for Pinkie, who was eating her fourth red velvet cupcake.

"I wish you luck, dear," Octavia said. "I happen to know Spitfire, she's very stern about who joins and who doesn't."

"Oh yeah, I got that gist at Wonderbolt Academy. She's one tough nugget, I'll tell you; I like that!"

"She's normally a lot more laid back, she just becomes a different pony when at the academy."

As the conversation carried on about the Wonderbolts, the waiter came with the check. Octavia tried to pay for the whole dinner, but Rarity wouldn't hear of it. While Rarity pitching in some bits for the meal was not a surprise to the group, Rainbow Dash paying for some of it was.

"You know, I've had a good time, good eats, good music," Rainbow explained to the astonished looks of her friends, "and I love meeting Pinkie's sister. She's cool, and I'd like to see her again."

"Yeah, any pony who can listen to you ramble about your skills is a prize, sugar cube," Applejack snarked with a cheeky grin.

Rainbow frowned at her, then continued. "So yeah, I just wanted to thank Pinkie for all this. We should do it again some time."

Pinkie's forelegs suddenly moved in robotic twitches, miming the shape of a light bulb over her head. Her hair became extra fluffy as a burst of static from nowhere could be heard, and the lightbulb-shaped area over her head lit up. Before any of her friends could question this, Pinkie exclaimed, "Brilliant, Dashie!"

"Hmm?"

"I need to organize a party. A family get-together party, and get all of your families and mine in the same place! It's… it's brilliant! You're so smart, Dashie!"

"I am?" Rainbow asked, then collected herself. "I mean, yeah, of course I am. And you know what, Pinks? I think I'll help you with this."

"Aw, Dashie, you're the best friend a pony could ask for!"

As Pinkie glomp-hugged her friend (knocking her down in the process), Octavia chuckled at her sister's antics. "I guess you all are used to my sister by now?"

"Truth be told, one cannot get fully used to her, but we love her," Twilight said. "I'm guessing growing up with her was quite the experience?"

"Like living with a bunch of hyperactive bunnies and birds buzzing around," the musician said with a wistful reminiscent tone in her voice.

"Really?" Fluttershy asked. "Because I am, and it's relatively calm."

"Then I guess I'll have to think of a new metaphor."

As Octavia and the others laughed, Dash struggled on the ground. "Argh, gerroff me, Pinks! Stop hugging me so much in public! You're killing my image!"


A caravan consisting of five nervous ponies was trekking across an open dirt road. Two of them had spears, the unicorn carrying it with magic and the earth pony in his mouth. At the front, an earth pony of considerable size was pulling the large wagon.
The other two, a pegasus lady and a colt, were watching the area from all angles. The colt even glanced down at the ground, as if expecting something to burst out from the dirt. He was that terrified.
And in the time frame of a heartbeat, he had every right to be. Several pegasi darted down at the caravan, the shrill whistle of wind the only warning. The lady pegasus screamed and huddled against the wagon, trying to avoid being hit.
The colt covered his eyes and prayed it would be over soon. For the earth pony with the crude spear in his mouth, it was. A real spear imbedded in his neck, and he started gasping and gagging for air. A couple seconds later, another pegasus shanked him in the side with a blade attached to her wing, piercing between the ribs and into the heart.
The unicorn managed to survive a few more seconds, deflecting the trident that was thrust at her. She snarled at her opponent, but when she saw who it was, her courage died.
"You… you're-"
She never got any further. The cyan-colored pegasus drove her trident deep into the unicorn's chest, knocking her onto her back. Struggling against the fatal blow, the unicorn tried to remove the weapon, but her attacker drove it further down. She twitched once, and then lay still.
Rainbow Dash removed her trident from the dead unicorn, blood spurting from the fatal wounds. She glanced around the one-wagon caravan with her good eye, frowning darkly. Her soldiers, about twenty in total, were all positioned perfectly; maybe too perfectly, it seemed excessive for a one-wagon caravan.
"Is this it?" she asked.
"It's all I see, Commander," one of the pegasi, armed with a trident and pointing it at the colt, called out to her.
"Commander, these three are all that are around," said a second pegasus warrior, landing next to Rainbow Dash and saluting her. His wing blade, still stained with the earth pony's blood, clinked against his bronze helmet.
Rainbow Dash nodded, then approached the earth pony who had been pulling the wagon. He had two pegasi staring him down, armed with spears, and he was in no position to fight back. Still, his concern was over the pegasus lady that was huddled against the wagon, also with two pegasi watching her with weapons ready.
"Which house do you serve?" Rainbow asked the earth pony.
"We… we don't serve any house. We are just a couple, simple villages."
Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes, an unnerving sight for the earth pony. He wondered briefly if that red eye, pure like a marble inserted in her eye socket, could still see. It was a red island in a sea of charred skin that spanned up to her helmet and down into her breastplate.
"It's an awfully big wagon for a trip," Rainbow said, glancing at the vehicle again. Flapping her wings, she checked the inside contents. "Food, water, clothing, blankets… what is the purpose of your trip?"
"I… we…"
"Come clean, or we will finish off another member of the caravan."
The pegasi that were standing over the caravan's pegasus tightened their grips on their weapons. The earth pony saw this, and shouted, "No, please! She's my wife!"
"Then answer."
"We… we are two villages who are trying to remain neutral in this war, ma'am. We aren't warriors."
"There should not be anyone neutral in a war about the very future of our world," scoffed Rainbow. She thumped her hoof against the center of her armor, where a lightning bolt emblem gleamed. "Do you know who I am?"
"You… you are Rainbow Dash."
"Force Commander Supreme Rainbow Dash, to be specific. And I am here because I am here to win a war. Now, where are these villages?"
"They… we are heading for one now."
"Alright, then this is what we are going to do, earth pony."
Rainbow Dash gestured to the couple of pegasi who were hovering above as a look-out. Instantly, the two began unloading the wagon, as their leader hovered back to the earth pony.
"We are taking your supplies, for House Stormwing. You, and both of these villages, will be serving us. Our fight is your fight."
"But… we are not warriors!"
"There are other ways to fight. We need farmers, among other things. You and your wife may assist us with this."
"My… my children," the caravan's pegasus whimpered. "Please, I don't want them to go to war."
The prismatic-maned pegasus walked over to her. After staring her down for a moment, there was a flash of steel and wing. The pegasus lady fell backwards, clutching her face.
The earth pony bolted towards his wife, screaming her name, but the two pegasi on him had him pinned down instantly. Rainbow Dash pointed her wing blade the earth pony's face.
"She lives, it is merely a scarring wound, for her to wear in pride," she said.
The pegasus lady sat up, staring at her husband. "Don't fight them, dear, they'll kill you!" She was trying her best to put on a strong face, clutching her bleeding cut on her cheek with a hoof. The earth pony nodded, grimacing and wishing death on Force Commander Supreme.
"We need strong pegasi to join us, to make this world a better place," Rainbow continued. She trotted over to the colt that was still shivering in terror; he was even more scared when he saw her. "Is this one of your children?"
"N-no," the pegasus lady said. "He… his parents were killed a few months back. We… we are looking out for him."
"Very good of you. I will relieve you of that responsibility, as he will be a fine addition to our ranks." Rainbow used her trident's pole to tap the colt's wings. "He has some good balance to him, he just needs proper training.
"Now let's get down to business," Rainbow said, grinning with confidence. Her prismatic tail flicked around as she talked, brushing against her scarred hind legs. "Steel Wind, Razor Wing, I want you two to have the earth pony show you the village they were traveling to. Make note of its location, and then return with reinforcements to draft them.
"And make no mistake, earth pony," she said, frowning darkly, "you try anything, like try to get the villagers to flee or fight back, we will kill everypony. Starting with your wife and children."
He nodded humbly, and Rainbow continued. "Hawk Eyes, Fervent Flight, you have the lady here escort you back to the village they were at. Same rules apply, lady, don't try anything funny. And get that cheek looked at, we wouldn't want an infection, would we?
"Death Wings, escort the lad here to Cloudsdale. He'll need to be put into training immediately, and maybe some food; he looks half-starved. What on Equestria are you two doing to him?"
"Food has been scarce, ma'am," the pegasus lady explained. "P-please believe us, we have been doing our best."
"I am now your commander, so you will address me as such."
"Y-yes, Commander."
"Very good. Now you have your orders, please carry them out."
"But… but…"
The pegasus lady was glancing at the bodies of the two guards. She glanced at Rainbow Dash, pleading for mercy without daring to say it. The Stormwing leader shrugged, and said, "Your dead comrades are of no concern to you anymore. Go now, and welcome to House Stormwing. You've done everypony a good deed by having them join the right side of the war."
As the soldiers escorted the three new draftees, Rainbow Dash addressed the remaining pegasus soldiers still at the scene. "Take all the supplies you can. The dead bodies, you know what to do with them.
"And whoever sees Scootaloo next, tell her I want to see her," she said, wiping the blood off of her trident on the grass. "Some pony needs to tell her, in a scouting report, the difference between 'caravan' and 'single wagon'. Understood?"
"YES, COMMANDER," the Stormwing soldiers exclaimed in unison.
It made Rainbow Dash grin, seeing and hearing such loyal soldiers, under her command. It picked up her mood a little, which had been tense ever since she heard intel of a major battle coming, of which House Stormwing wasn't ready.
Oh, who was she kidding? House Stormwing was always ready. Blood was going to be spilt when the pegasi attacked from the sky, and this battle would be no exception.


One week after visiting Octavia in Canterlot, Pinkie Pie had all the preparations for a family get-together party. Her friends didn't know how she could have, especially since she had managed to find a day where none of their parents, or families, were too busy to come.

Twilight Sparkle's family had been the most difficult to plan, but as it turned out, Shining Armor and Cadence were available, even with the approaching Equestria Games. Twilight didn't believe at first that they could up and leave the Crystal Empire for a day, but Shining's letter to her cleared that up.

"Don't worry about it," he had written. "We have a couple formidable crystal ponies in charge in our absence, ones we are training for such authority, and we believe this'll be the perfect test.

"Plus, Princess Celestia not only said it was okay, but insisted we attend. She seemed rather pleased at the idea of a family get-together… did Pinkie tell her about it?"

Truth be told, Twilight Sparkle wondered if Pinkie had asked the princess herself to make sure her rather busy family was available. She shrugged off this theory after a moment of thought. Pinkie was capable of many unpredictable things, but being able to have Princess Celestia assist her in planning a party? That was impossible… right?

Pinkie worked herself up in a frenzy over the upcoming party. That is, if frenzies are usually described as gleefully excitable blurs of mauve that smell like sugar and party cannon powder. (Mareiam-Webster has absolutely no such description.)

With two days away from the big party, Applejack decided to help Pinkie Pie, as she had an afternoon off. When she arrived at Sugarcube Corner, she was rather shocked to find Pinkie sitting at a table, flicking idly at a napkin holder.

"Hey there, Pinkster," she said, trotting up to her friend, "what's got that famous smile upside-down?"

"Oh, hi, Applejack. Nothing's wrong, really," she said with the most unconvincing of tones. The farmer pony frowned, and nudged her friend. "Well, I just got a letter from my parents."

"Oh, the ol' rock farmers! What's up?"

"They cannot come," she sighed rather heavily and leaned back in her chair. She almost toppled over, had not her hind legs caught herself at the table, keeping her almost at a horizontal state as she stared up at the ceiling. "There's a rock shortage emergency in Colterado, and thus my mom, dad, and Bellamina are going to have to be working hard on the farm. So they cannot make it."

"Aw, sugar cube, that's too bad, really," Applejack said. She placed a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder, but was careful to apply pressure, as she might knock her down with her sitting in a chair propped up on two legs. "But Octavia's still coming, right?"

"Nopey-dopey. Didn't I tell you? Big concert sign-up that happened a day ago, she is going to be performing in front of a huge crowd in Fillydelphia. Even bigger than the one we saw her at a week ago… blargh!"

She threw her hooves up in the air, wobbling dangerously in her chair as Applejack tried to steady her. "The universe is working against me! I knew it would one day! How could you betray me, universe, after all we been through?"

"Sugar pie, we could always reschedule the family get-together," Applejack suggested as she balanced Pinkie Pie out, settling the chair on all fours. "After all, if none of your family can come-"

"Can't do, Applejack," Pinkie lamented. "Princess Cadence and Shining Armor cannot reschedule their schedule, they are scheduled to run a kingdom! Rarity's parents are gonna be gone for a few weeks after this week, and worst of all, Angel Bunny has been very stern about Fluttershy's schedule."

"That blasted bunny of hers, who's he think he is?"

"I tried to argue time frames with him, but he knows wrestling. Luckily, I was able to pin him down for ten seconds with a scissor hind leg suppression, so he lost the argument on if she can stay up late for the party night. I don't want to go for another round with that bunny, Applejack, he fights dirty."

Applejack shook her head. "Yeah, see, this is why Ah prefer dogs. But sugar cube, it's your family that's missing out, and it's your party. Are you sure?"

"They gave me their blessing to continue, but…," she sighed heavily and buried her face in her forelegs at the table. "It's not going to be the same with them."

"Of course it isn't. But mark my words, sugar cube, we'll meet your family one day."

"They live really far away, almost like a universe away. Curse you again, universe! Ruining the party again!"

"Sugar cube."

Applejack made the party pony raise her head, her apple-green eyes staring into Pinkie's sky blues. "Listen. We all are going to be very sad that we don't get to meet y'all's whole family, but this party ain't ruined."

"You really think so?"

"Pinkie, Ah've seen you throw hundreds of parties, over any slight reason. Here's a party with more reason, purpose, and heart, so of course it's going ta work out. It's a Pinkie party, and it's gonna involve family. It cannot go wrong!"

Pinkie Pie managed to smile at this. "You shouldn't used jinxed words like that."

"Bah, words are words, Pinkie. Now stop being more sad than a woodpecker who's discovered he's been working on a phone pole for the past hour."

"Right-o, partner! I need to start using the party cannon to get the big decorations ready!"

Soon, the frenzy was back in full-blast, quite literally. Applejack was more of a spotting assistant ("Ya missed a spot there, Pinks,") than really helping, but she didn't mind.

"So non-family are invited too, right?" Applejack asked as she dodged a particularly close cannon blast.

"Yeppy yeppers! Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle asked me if Scootaloo and some other friends could come, and I told them it was fine!"

"We aren't going to be having a lot of the Apple family. Just Babs, Braeburn, Apple Fritter, and a few others; they were the only ones to make it. Hope that's okay."

"Shame, I wanted the whole Apple Family."

"They all already were here a few weeks back for the reunion, if y'all remember. Besides, they wouldn't all fit in here, squeezed in tighter than hay in a silo."

"Shame, I haven't thrown a party in a silo since forever!"

As Applejack tried to think of how that was possible, she dodged another cannon blast. "Anypony else coming?"

"Sure! Lyra and Bonbon, Berry Punch, Derpy and her kids, the Doctor, the Cakes, Cherilee, Carrot Top, and anybody else who wants to come! Friends are like family!"

"'Anybody' else?"

"Yeah, Cranky and Matilda might come, Zecora, maybe that minotaur friend of Fluttershy!"

"Ah don't think they were friends, Pinkie…"

"Friends can always be made, maybe that's why he'll come. Oh, and I have a special friend coming, but it's a surprise who! Not telling!"

Pinkie Pie hummed as he lined up a particular shot of her party cannon. Applejack watched her focus, as the party pony added, "I made myself Pinkie Promise with myself, and I'd kill me if I broke my promise with me; you have no idea how stern I get with me'self, I'm like a whole new pony."

Applejack chuckled and shook her head. "Oh Pinkie, what would we do without ya?"

"Your right, AJ."

"Yeah, Ah guess Ah do get to be once in a whi-"

BLAM!

"Gah! Pinkie!"

"Well, I warned you! 'Your right,' but did you move? Nope! … Wow, maybe I should have phrased that better."

Applejack dusted off the confetti from her hat, scowling as her friend skipped up to her room, babbling about getting some special items for the party involving music and such. The farm pony couldn't help but laugh at herself.

"Seriously though," she said under her breath, smiling again, "what would we do without ya, Pinks?"


Applejack stared long and hard at the map, frowning as she tapped her right fore-hoof against the sturdy oak frame. The other ponies around the gigantic map, the size of a grand table, watched her. Her singular eye darted around, as if trying to find some kind of weakness.
"We all know that Twilight Sparkle is planning to take New Ponyville," she said aloud, alerting those around her, "but how does she plan to cross Shattered Care River?"
"Maybe she will have her troops dam it?" Apple Fritter suggested. "Y'all know her troops are capable of powerful magic, wouldn't be the first time she tried such a tactic."
"But would she really risk throwing off the river's flow like that?" Apple Bloom asked. The yellow-coated mare scratched at her flank, feeling self-conscious about being the one who was skilled in creating weapons, not using them, was here at this meeting.
"Twilight Sparkle," Applejack snarled, pounding the side of the frame with a hoof, "does not give a damn about the damage she causes to this world. Ah am amazed she hasn't tried to burn the whole world past her precious Canterlot."
"May not be that simple, Commander," Big Macintosh said, tapping the map over the end of Shattered Care River, which passed through two major cities and emptied into the Gulf of Manehattan. "Should she dam the river, Manehattan and Baltimare would lose their water source."
"Mistress Rarity would take large umbrage to her city and its neighboring trade partner losing the river," Apple Fritter agreed. "Losing the support of House Whitegold is something she can't afford ta do, not with how limited her unicorn troops are compared ta our troops."
Applejack glanced over at her cousin, staring hard at her. She knew Apple Fritter was a dedicated General, but something had always bothered her deep down. Apple Fritter always played a more emotional stand-point when it came to strategy, something that all these years of war had never changed.
Still, she had rarely been wrong. It was because of Apple Fritter that Big Mac had led the troops to conquer Fillydelphia against a siege of Fluttershy's troops. They might have won the pushback follow-up fight, had hydras not appeared.
"Do you think she'll try to use Redheart's Refuge as a neutral sanctuary?" Apple Bloom asked.
"That's possible… but Redheart's Refuge is only for the sick, the injured, and the neutral," Applejack mused. "Ah highly doubt they would allow an army in there."
"By force, maybe," suggested Big Mac.
"And we cannot afford to forget," said Caramel Apple, pointing at the Everfree Forest, "that Fluttershy might attack again, y'all."
"Or House Stormwing attacks when we are busy attacking each other," Apple Cobbler added.
"Or the Cult of Laughter," Apple Fritter muttered, scratching her chin. "We really are caught between a few hard points, aren't we?"
The three Apple Generals stared long and hard at Manehattan, all thinking the same thing. Applejack could see it on their faces, and her brother's too. "Maybe it's time to consider Rarity's offer?" was the question that burned so hard, it seemed to form visible words that could be seen on the back of her eyepatch.
"Ah would rather pluck out mah other eye," she said aloud, glaring at them, "than let that steaming sack of deceit and lies assist us in this fight. Too many times has she played us, too many times has her information been faulty. We do this with our sweat, hooves, and blood, not her gold-grabbing mercs."
The room was silent for a few moments, with all of them looking at the map of Equestria. Four Apple Generals, the Supreme Commander, and the Master Blacksmith were so busy thinking about their plans, they missed the cough of the lone pegasus.
"Um, hey y'all," she spoke aloud, catching their attention with her attempt at imitating their accent.
"What, Cloud Kicker?" Apple Fritter asked. "You have a plan?"
"Well, you all are so worried about Twilight crossing the river, so why don't we do it first?"
"Cross the river to meet her troops?" Applejack repeated. "Is that your proposal?"
"I could lead a scouting patrol of pegasus followers, and discover where the troops of House Moon and Star are, then we will flank their sorry flanks."
"That's not a bad plan, but you are forgetting that our army still needs to cross. How do you plan to ford the river?"
Cloud Kicker chuckled, glancing over at Apple Bloom. "Is your bridge invention ready yet, cutie?"
"Sure is," Apple Bloom said. "Ah have heard back from my tinker team at New Ponyville, the mechanical bridge is ready to be deployed."
"That is ready now?" Applejack questioned. She remembered Apple Bloom talking about the device, a long bridge that could extend a good distance, then set up legs on the other side for proper support. "Why was Ah not informed?"
"Ah only heard about it last night, Commander; mah apologies, Ah should have told ya sooner than now."
"So long as it works, Ah don't mind at all."
Supreme Commander Applejack smirked as she thought about how this would work. "Twilight's usually the one on the offense; she thinks we're gonna be running with our tails between our legs. Time for her to feel the earth shake when her troops are on the defense."
"Ah would like," Apple Fritter spoke up, "to be the one ta lead the charge, commander. I work best with the pegasi of Earthborn."
"Granted. Sorry, Apple Cobbler," she said, addressing the Apple General, "I know you were planned, but Apple Fritter is best with these situations."
"Then with your permission," the orange coated General said, "Ah would like to lead to have a small portion of troops to guard New Ponyville, in case any of the houses have any funny ideas on attacking it during the battle."
"Granted."
Applejack tilted her bronze helmet-hat down, casting a shadow over her eye and eyepatch. Her chain mail armor jingled as she hoisted herself up on the table map, and placed a hoof south of New Ponyville's position. "And here, Caramel Apple, Ah want you to keep to keep a thousand troops."
"My Commander, why so many? And why there?"
"If Ah am guessing right, one or more of the houses may have hired mercs from Mistress Rarity," Applejack explained. "Ah want you to make sure any pony, or any dog, that comes that way isn't going to attack from behind.
"No prisoners, y'all hear? This is not a tactical battle, this is not a skirmish. We are going to spill a lot of blood, and Ah don't want any mercy. We're gonna be showing a sign that we are going to end this war; it's been going on too long, we've been too soft with them."
All of the ponies nodded, and Applejack moved back down off the table map. "Cloud Kicker, Apple Fritter, prepare for movement. Ah expect to see y'all ta be leaving Appleloosa before the sun goes down. Got it?"
"Yes, Commander."
"Yes, Commander."
"Apple Cobbler, Caramel Apple, same can be said for y'all too. Now go prepare, I will speak with the troops before they leave. Big Mac and myself will travel to Fillydelphia tomorrow to better assist y'all in the attack, in case it drags on.
"Peachy Sweet will be taking care of our capital; Apple Bloom, you are to assist her and keep her up to speed, as well as the other Apple Generals. Y'all understand?"
"Yes, Commander," they responded in unison.
"Perfect," she permitted a proud smile on her normally stern face. "Y'all make me proud, ya really do. The following week is going ta be a glorious victory for House Earthborn, Ah kin feel it.
"We must send messages to Apple Strudel, Braeburn, and Strongheart and the Thunderhooves posthaste. The attack could start as soon as tomorrow, so there is no time ta lose."
Later that day, Applejack was standing on what she called the Army Addressing Balcony. The large building in Appleloosa was the War Apple, a building where Generals, council members, and important figures debated the important aspects of the war. The back of it had a large balcony that faced the barracks, and the large field in the center.
Now, thousands of soldiers were lined up perfectly, their polished armor gleaming in the afternoon sun. Pegasi auxiliary troops were standing on the sides, wings spread proudly.
The heavily armored juggernaut troops, each the size of Big Mac, shined the best in the light; it amazed Applejack to this day how troops that fought like fierce rhinos could keep their armor appearing so well.
The cannons were polished as well, and the rocket launchers, designed by Apple Bloom and crewed by very brave ponies, were lined up evenly.
It made Applejack so proud to see them like that.
She walked up to the balcony's railing, and thousands of hooves saluted her in unison. As she gave the at ease order, Apple Bloom and Cloud Kicker walked up to her side. The two were great morale boosters for the troops, no matter if they were male or female, pegasus or earth pony.
"Soldiers of House Earthborn," Applejack shouted to the troops, her voice booming across the court, "Ah stand before you, proud of what Ah see. You do me proud, you do Equestria proud!
"Tonight, y'all will be marching to New Ponyville, and defending one of the most pivotal points, our landmark, the symbol of our strength and determination.
"And we will not falter! Ah know you will not, we will crush any force that tries to fight us!"
Many of the soldiers cheered and roared in agreement. Cloud Kicker pumped a hoof in the air, the pegasi warriors did the same.
"If any unicorn of House Moon and Star dares to fight us, we will stomp their feeble bodies into pulp, and add their horns to our collection!"
More roars and cheers followed, and Supreme Commander Applejack raised her hoof in the air, shouting their famous quote.
"WE! ARE! EQUESTRIA!"
The troops shouted back with enough force to be heard from a mile away. "WE ARE EQUESTRIA!"


Frederic Horseshoepin slammed the phone down, so hard that it left cracks in the device. His bandmates flinched, even though these days, his outrage wasn't so uncommon.

"We've been cancelled," he snarled.

Symphony gasped the loudest of the group. "What? But we had the theater for a week now! How could they buck us off like that?"

"Apparently, they've been polling the ponies of Fillydelphia to see what they would really want," he said, a little hard to understand with how hard he was grinding his teeth. "They don't want classical music, they want that techno-pop horse apples that is all the rage."

"Damn it all to Tartarus!" Parish shouted, sitting down on the couch. He glared at Octavia, and said, "You promised us this would work."

The cellist raised an eyebrow at the accusation, but didn't justify it with anything else. She had been sitting in a chair, fearing the worst when Frederic took that call. Merely sighing, she glanced out the window.

"This is just so predictable," Concerto grumbled. "Ousted again for that horse apple nonsense."

"Who was it?" Symphony asked. "Did they say who was replacing us? Was it that creep that stole the concert hall from us in Manehattan? Oaken Burner? DJ Pon-3? DJ-TDI CB?"

"Does it matter?" Frederic asked. "We are out of a job again, this is happening too many times. This is not how I planned my career!"

"It's not how any of us planned our careers, you selfish creep," she fired at him. "Maybe I should have left when Beauty Brass did!"

"Sure, get yourself knocked up too," Parish snarked. "With how you've been playing the violin, you should get used to screeching noises."

Symphony made her way over to smack him, and a hoof-fight might have broken out if Octavia hadn't stopped them. It took a minute, but they finally calmed down enough to talk again.

"Well, obviously," Frederic said, "we should look for another place to play."

"We looked all over after Canterlot," Concerto said. "We're royally out of a job. There's no major events for a couple weeks now, not even in Canterlot."

"We were really booking on this," Symphony griped, running her hooves through her royal purple mane. She ended glaring at Octavia, and added, "If you hadn't banked everything on this, we wouldn't be stuck in this position."

"You're supposed to be the leader, Octavia," Parish commented. "So what's your excuse this time?"

"I don't need an excuse," she snapped at them, narrowing her orchid eyes. "What happened was out of my hooves, and blaming me won't change that fact."

"Maybe some pony else should book our concerts," Parish continued. "Some pony who will make sure we are not bucked off for techno drivel."

Octavia glanced around at her bandmates, and sighed heavily. She hated how her band had descended into this, squabbling like children over every dispute. It made her long for Pinkie, and one of her calming smiles…

The thoughts of her sister, and her sweet friends, came to Octavia in such a rush that she audibly gasped. Rushing to her date book, she flipped through to confirm the date.

"Tomorrow," she said.

"What's this?" Concerto asked, alerted like the others. "Do you know of a place we could perform?"

"Huh? No, I'm sorry. The family get-together my sister had planned is tomorrow, in her hometown Ponyville. I was going to miss it because of this concert, but with nothing on our plate, I suppose we could attend."

Her bandmates stared at her as if she had suggested they learn how to professionally play the accordion. "You're kidding, right?" Frederic said with a loud scoff. "A no-name village? Would they even pay us?"

"I wouldn't ask my sister to pay us for playing at a party she invited me to."

"Oh, well that's just GREAT!"

Parish knocked over the coffee table in his outrage. Symphony and Concerto flinched, but Octavia didn't budge at this temper tantrum. He went on, "You're asking us to play for free? We are out of work at the moment, we need to find a job, and you want us to go off to nowhere and play for free?"

"I looked all over for the job that we just lost," Octavia said, standing her ground. "It was the only one. The only other events are in next week, involving auditions and try-outs for big performances and parties; this week, there is a movement called-"

"And now you want to abandon us," Parish snapped at her, narrowing his eyes, "and run off to your little sister's party."

The question wasn't really a question when said with such venom. Octavia wondered if there was a way to gently answer it. Then, she thought, the way he was acting towards her, he didn't deserve gentle.

"I will be taking the train to Ponyville to see my sister, and be back in two days to our hotel here," Octavia said, trotting to her room to gather her things. She glanced over her shoulder at the band, adding, "You are welcome to join me, but you will behave yourself if you do come."


(The Day of the Party)

(Created by Party Cannon Inc.)

(Which is short for Party Cannon INCOMING!!)

The party unofficially started in the early afternoon, as that was when the children would be able to join. The Cutie Mark Crusaders, including Babs Seed, and Apple Bloom's friend Twist were enjoying the games Pinkie set up.

Applejack's immediate family were there. Granny Smith, who had been watching Apple Bloom and Babs Seed since the morning, was asleep in a rocking chair that Pinkie had set up for her, just in case.

The Derpy family arrived shortly, sans Doctor Whooves who would be arriving later. Derpy's biological daughter, Dinky, immediately playing with the other foals while her adopted daughter, Amethyst, made small chat with Twilight.

Carrot Top joined them, snacking on the sweets Pinkie was making, while Derpy, naturally, attacked the muffins.

Soon, several of Ponyville's residents, and friends of Bearers of Harmony, were entering the party to pay respects and join in the games Pinkie set up. Cranky and Matilda showed up, though briefly due to Cranky's knees acting up on him; she made sure to give them a doggie bag stuffed full of treats.

Apple family members were arriving soon, including Braeburn. He was keen to get to know Applejack's friends more, and he had almost as much a motor mouth as Pinkie. While he would talk to everypony, he seemed a little more partial to Rarity. City folk ladies sure put the whammy on him.

Apple Fritter, who had brought many homemade dishes, was being hit on by a rather amorous Cloud Kicker; while Apple Fritter didn't mind so much, Kicker's best friend Blossomforth was trying to yank her away to stop her from causing a scene at a family get-together.

"Stop this, we're guests," Blossomforth pleaded.

"Hey, I just have a hankering for apples," Kicker replied with a cheeky grin.

"You two always like this?" Apple Fritter asked playfully.

Rarity's parents were the first to arrive. Her father, Magnum, started a hearty conversation with the Cakes, helping them with Pound and Pumpkin; he always did love caring for babies, and thus shared his stories on baby Rarity and Sweetie Belle. Neither of the girls knew, so they couldn't stop their father from spreading such embarrassing stories.

Rarity's mother, Pearl, started chatting with Granny Smith. She talked about everything, from family to the cities they saw to the good old days. About an hour later, Rarity would inform her mother that Granny Smith was sleeping, and not just being a good listener.

Then Rainbow Dash's moms arrived. Most of her friends knew that she, like Applejack and Fluttershy, were Love Children, born in a family with two moms due to fertility-love elixirs, thus it wasn't a shock to Dash's friends that she had two moms.

What was surprising was how calm and collected they were.

Dash's parents were very sweet and soft-spoken, complimenting all of the ponies there. Both pegasi mares were eager to meet Rainbow's friends, and especially joyful to see Fluttershy again. As they met others' parents, they were lavishing praise on everypony.

"Well, now we can see how Rainbow Dash got her ego," Applejack whispered to Fluttershy. "She must have been praised almost every day."

Fluttershy's parents were as nice as any pony could expect, even more complimenting than Rainbow's parents. While Fluttershy loved her parents very much, she still felt shy over them gushing over her friends and neighbors, and especially when they started telling stories about filly Fluttershy.

She stepped away, near the front door, where a certain familiar couple were trotting in. Bonbon didn't look too thrilled, however.

"I don't know why we're coming here, Lyra," the candy making pony grumbled. "I mean, it's a family get-together, we're not family."

"Pinkie Pie invited us, now please be nice," Lyra pleaded. "If we upset our friends' parents, they'll never forgive us."

"I'd be a little more obliging if they had paid full price for the candy for tonight."

"I offered Pinkie that discount. Please, Bonbon?"

"Look, I'm don't like being grudging…"

The two stopped when they nearly bumped into Fluttershy. The timid pegasus huddled up when she saw Bonbon, because, contrary to what she just said, the candy maker was still a little grudging over the trash incident a few months ago.

"Um, hello," Fluttershy said, bowing a little at them. "It's really nice to see you two come!"

"Thank you, Fluttershy," Lyra said, smiling at her. She nudged Bonbon, who sighed and nodded.

"Yeah, thanks for the invite," Bonbon said. "I'm sure it'll be a good night."

Sensing Bonbon's frustration, Fluttershy took it upon herself to escort the couple to the treat table. Soon, the two were eating and conversing.

"Good save there, Flutters," Pinkie said, popping up behind the rather startled pegasus. "Bonbon seems a little upset still… maybe tonight's not the night I ask when she and Lyra are going to finally get married."

"Oh, um, I don't know," Fluttershy admitted, glancing at the two. "I mean, uh, how long have they been seeing each other?"

"Approximately-"

Before Pinkie could share her detailed knowledge of her friends, Twilight's family walked in. Princess Cadence caused a moment of silence as everypony started to bow to her. She held up her hoof, and pleaded with them.

"No no, please! Today, I am not a princess or royalty," she said, smiling at everypony. "I am simply Twilight Sparkle's sister-in-law."

Twilight's parents were with her and Shining Armor, and thus started to mingle. The foals practically swarmed Cadence, asking her all sorts of questions. Fluttershy's parents chatted up Twilight's.

Shining Armor tried to make conversation with Big Macintosh. Tried being the key word.

"So, you're Applejack's big brother right?" Shining asked politely as he had some of the punch (missing Gummy bathing in the bowl).

"Eeyup."

"Is Sweet Apple Acres doing alright these days?"

"Eeyup."

"How's Twily doing around here? Good?"

"Eeyup."

"… You don't say much, do you?"

"Nope."

Shining Armor tried to think of what else to ask Big Mac as Fluttershy came by. She refilled their drinks, and thanked them again for coming. When both stallions thanked her in unison, she blushed and scampered off, stammering something about trying to find others who needed punch.

"She sure is a timid thing, isn't she?" Shining asked Mac.

"Eeyup."

"Is she sweet on you or something?"

"What? What makes you think that? Err, I mean," Big Mac cleared his throat. "Nope."

Fluttershy almost crashed into two pegasi when fleeing the scene. Big McLargehooves, the large, snow-white pegasus with tiny wings and big heart, and Thunderlane, who was watching his little brother playing with the other foals.

She always found it a little hard to talk to them, Big because of his stature, and Thunderlane because, well, she always had a thing for him; he had such a nice flank. "Oh, um, hello!" Fluttershy managed to say as she approached them. "How are you guys doing? We're glad to have you, having a good time?"

"YEAH!" McLargehooves replied, causing Fluttershy's mane and Thunderlane's mohawk to be blown in the wind of his enthusiasm.

"We're fine, Fluttershy, thank you," Thunderlane said. As Fluttershy trotted off, he frowned at Big and said, "Dude, what have I told you about indoor voices? Mares prefer stallions who don't make them deaf."

"Sorry, buddy."

As Fluttershy trotted off, she, for the second time this party, almost ran into some pony. This guest caught the snazzy sunglasses that almost fell off her face, then grinned at the flustered pegasus.

"Hey there," she said with a friendly smile. "Somepony call for a DJ?"

"VINYL!"

A pink blur that both Fluttershy and Vinyl were used to darted at the DJ; however, Vinyl was ready. With the kind of timing that only experience could bring, the unicorn caught Pinkie mid-glomp, spun her around in her hooves using Pinkie's momentum, and then embraced her in a hug at the end of the spin.

"How's my favorite DJ?"

"How's my favorite party girl?"

Fluttershy watched them, covering her mouth with her hoof. "Oh my! I know you," she said, watching Vinyl Scratch. "You're famous, aren't you?"

"A little. I mean, not as much as I want to be," Vinyl admitted, after leaving Pinkie's hug. "So you're Fluttershy, cutie? I know a little about you, as much as Pinkie's written me."

Fluttershy's face was normally yellow, but now she seemed like her head was a thick coat of red. Pinkie bonked Vinyl on the head, and the DJ grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, Pinks."

"Um, well, yes, err, so," Fluttershy tried to speak, then spat out the question on her mind, "so how do you know Vinyl, Pinkie?"

"Oh, I never told you that?" Fluttershy shook her head, and Pinkie grinned her 'story telling time' smile. "Well! You know how I was a rock farmer at first, but I left home to spread parties around Equestria until I found a place of my home?"

"I believe you titled it 'The Journey of Jubilation Celebration,' when you told me."

"It's a working title, for now. So anyway, as I am hosting a party at a hotel lobby, I meet this fine lady right here!"

She pat Vinyl's shoulder and the unicorn flicked her neon blue mane back. "Yeah, it was pretty crazy! She wanted some music, so I started up some wub dub, and that party was fun!"

"So we kind of toured together, throwing parties and playing music! It was a wonderful relationship, and we had such good times!"

"True, but it wasn't all sunshine and roses," Vinyl pointed out.

They both nodded somberly, staring down at the floor in remembrance. Fluttershy glanced at them both, wondering what to say, until Vinyl grinned.

"Aw, who are we kidding, it was pretty dang sweet!"

"Sure was!"

Fluttershy couldn't help but laugh with them. "So, I am going to guess that along the way, you two found your way to Ponyville?"

"Sure enough, and that's when I met the Cakes. They had a room available in a sweet bakery, I couldn't turn that down! So sadly, that was the infamous splitting of Pinkie-Vinyl."

Vinyl nodded, taking off her shades for a moment to let her ruby red eyes adjust to the bakery's light. "It was sad, but by then, I had a small following, and a stage name: DJ Pon-3."

"If I may ask, how'd you come up with that name?" Fluttershy asked.

"Pon is a combination of Pinkie's name and my birth name. Sorry, not telling you that just yet, Fluttershy, no matter how cute you are. And three's my lucky number. Now then…"

She put her shades back on, and said, "We need some music going on here! Pinkie told me that this wasn't a wubbing dubstep rocking world party, just something nice for family."

"Oh yes, if you could, Miss Scratch."

"Don't call me that, that sounds funny," Vinyl said with a laugh. "But if you wouldn't mind showing me where the record player is, Flutter-bunny, I have a fine selection in my saddlebags!"

A blushing Fluttershy led the way, while Pinkie nudged her DJ friend. "Hey come on now, Fluttershy's very sensitive, you cannot keep flirting with her like that!"

"I cannot help it, she's cuter than a kennel of puppies! Seriously, wasn't she a model? I could have sworn I saw her in a magazine…"

"Now now, just be nice to her, and you'll do better; I don't mind you flirting, just don't scare her."

"Okay, okay, anything you say, Pinks. So who are all these wonderful looking ponies?"

Pinkie grinned her 'introduction times' grin. "I'm glad you asked! They are…"

As they followed Fluttershy to the record player, Pinkie pointed her hooves. "That's Princess Cadence, co-ruler of the Crystal Kingdom with her hubby and Twilight's big brother, co-ruler Shining Armor. That's Derpy Hooves, Dinky Hooves, Amethyst Sparkler, Derpy's BPF Carrot Top, Aloe and Lotus the massage twins…

"Cloudchaser and Flitter, Big McLargehooves and Thunderlane (and doesn't he have a sweet flank?), Roseluck and Daisy and Lily, that's Cloud Kicker hitting on Apple Fritter as Blossomforth tries to stop her…

"Cheerilee is the one watching the kids: Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Babs Seed, Twist, Rumble (lucky colt, all those girls around him, eh?)…

"Those are Rarity's parents, Fluttershy's parents, Rainbow Dash's parents, Twilight Sparkle's parents, Cherry Berry, Lyra Heartstrings, Sweetie Drops a.k.a. Bonbon…

"Granny Smith, who's still asleep, is this her normal sleeping time, Applejack? That's Applejack, Apple Fritter, Caramel Apple, Braeburn, Big Mac… stop staring at Braeburn, Vinyl, AJ's defensive of family and I haven't even introduced you to them yet. That's Rainbow Dash's cousin, Rainbow Blitz…

"That's Twinkleshine, Caramel, Colgate, Sea Swirl, Berry Punch… who is sloshed already…"

"Berry, you're drunk," Colgate was saying to her close friend, "go ho-"

"I ain't going home! Why ish everypony alwaysh telling me to go home? It'sh not like being home shobersh me up any! Hic!"

"That's Mr. and Mrs. Cake, handling Pumpkin and Pound (aren't they kee-uuutest?), and oh! There's Time Turner, a.k.a. Doctor Whooves!

"He's been a friend to Derpy and her daughters for years, like, when Dinky was an itty-bitty filly," she whispered to Vinyl. "No pony quite knows their relationship…"

"Sorry I'm late, everypony," Doctor Whooves said as he trotted in. "Terribly sorry, Pink Slice! I hope I haven't missed anything!"

"Pinkie Pie, and it's okay; Derpy's enjoying the last batch of muffins."

"I figured as much, but thank you! Oh, hello, Butterflies," Doctor Whooves said as he passed by Fluttershy, who was preparing the record player. "Are you going to be singing a song? That'd be lovely."

"Sing? In front of everyone?"

Fluttershy began to shiver at the thought, but Pinkie slung a foreleg around her shoulders. "Now now, don't be scared! Your Auntie Pinkie Pie will sing along with you."

"Pinkie, didn't I tell you-"

"And your other Auntie Vinyl Scratch will join in!" Vinyl said, nodding a great deal. "C'mon, let's sing for the families!"

"Singing?" said Derpy, muffled from all the muffins stuffed in her mouth. "Mmm! Are we doing karaoke?"

"That's something we rocked in the Pinkie-Vinyl parties," Pinkie said. "You want to join, Derpy?"

"I'd love to!"

"Yay," Dinky cheered. "Momma's gonna sing!"

Fluttershy was still shivering and blushing, but took solace in Vinyl and Pinkie holding her close. She saw her moms watching, and decided that just this once she could be brave.

As Vinyl prepared a song they all knew, Rainbow Dash toasted them. "Yay for some singing, Fluttershy! Yay!"

Colgate joined in the cheering. "Yes, bravo! We all love it when you sing, Flutters!"

"Yaysh! Shing your little heartsh out!"

"Berry…"

"I shtill ain't going home! You cannot make me… even if I'm gonna faint now…"

A thud later, Fluttershy warmed up her throat, humming a little to prepare. "I can do this, I can do this," she thought to herself.

"You can do this, Fluttershy!" Pinkie encouraged.

Fluttershy smiled, and began to sing with Pinkie, Vinyl, and Derpy, as the music picked up…


The wildling pony pack leader tried to shove away the zebra shaman who was treating him. "Will you get off and help a pony or zebra who needs it? I'm fine!"
"Your injuries are more deadly than you believe," the zebra scolded him. "Until you're healed, your side I won't leave."
"We suffered a lot of damage in that raid, my burns are not as life-threatening as some of the others!"
The zebra continued to ignore him, wrapping healing salve-soaked bandages around his burns. The wildling pony stiffened a pained grunt as the medicine took effect, stinging like bees. He hated it, but it did mean the healing effect was happening.
Glancing over at his fellow wildling ponies that were in his pack, he prayed that they were fairing better. No suck luck, as the zebra shamans and wildling medics tried to desperately treat them.
One wilding unicorn was trying desperately to not collapse in agony, her horn damaged in the battle. A wildling pegasus had a wing burned off completely. Two of the wildling ponies were trying to remove the fur armor that had been burnt into their skin off of their bodies.
The pack leader then saw the most injured of his pack leaning against a wall, trying to stand when one of his hind legs had been scorched clean off, the wound almost completely cauterized. The amount of burns and magic damage he had suffered was noticeable, especially to the Everfree Wraiths…
The most feral of all ponies, mutated by shaman and natural magic, were pacing around the injured wildling, hissing at him hungrily. The pack leader saw their tongues lapping at their razor teeth, swishing their tails around, predatory eyes narrowing as they sniffed the burnt flesh on the limping pony.
"Stay the Tartarus away from him," the pack leader shouted, pushing his zebra healer away to head towards them.
"Everybody stop."
Ponies, feral and wildling, and zebras halted their actions. A yellow pony walked into the clearing where the troops were being cared for. The fur jacket seemed to gleam in the light of the rising moon, reflecting off the pony's antler headdress.
Though what glowed the most were the pony's eyes. The bright green radiance that came from not just the pupil, but what was the former whites of the eyes. These radiating eyes were scanning every being in the clearing, searching for answers.
"What happened with the scouting party?" Lady Fluttershy asked. "Pack Leader Vine Whip, report."
"We patrolled Whitetail Woods, hunting the scent of unicorns, my Lady," the pack leader said, shrugging off the pain of his injuries. "The tunnels are still operational, just in case you were wondering-"
"I want to know how the scouting report went, pack leader."
"Y-yes, my Lady. You… you were right. House Moon and Star is moving west, possibly to New Ponyville. We were watching them from Whitetail Woods, near Redheart's Refuge, when we were ambushed by a scouting party… led by an Celestial Inquisitor."
Lady Fluttershy growled, a guttural noise that would frighten even a bear. She lifted a hoof and squeezed. "Those life burning monsters… what happened?"
"We… we lost five, and you can see the state we are in now. But I am happy to report that the Inquisitor, as well as the scouting party, is dead. We reported back, they didn't."
The pack members nodded in agreement, including the crippled one. The Everfree Wraiths snarled and closed in on him, but a single order from Lady Fluttershy made them pull back.
"My Lady, I hope that you are pleased with our report," Pack Leader Vine Whip continued. "We could consider this a victory for House Everfree."
Lady Fluttershy glanced back at him, then stomped her hoof down. The earth itself seemed to shake, the trees rumbling with their leaves whispering ominously in the vibrations. The night grew colder, especially for Pack Leader Vine Whip.
He was staring into two, dark green abysses that felt like they were sucking the very soul out of him. His heart hammered so fast, he feared it might explode; his body threatened to quit and let him die from terror.
"Tell me," Fluttershy hissed, "how you consider this a victory? You were a scouting party that suffered five casualties and numerous injuries, with a battle approaching us by this very night! Your only claim for victory is slaying a single pony!
"ONE PONY! HOW IS THAT VICTORY?"
The ground and wind both rattled from her bellowing. Pack Leader Vine Whip, and every pony and zebra there, had to resist wetting themselves in their primal terror; even the Wraiths were shivering. The most injured pony couldn't hold back his any more, and couldn't even cross his hind legs to hide his shame.
The pack leader took several deep breaths, trying so very hard to push away his own heart-stopping fear. "My Lady, the Celestial Inquisitors are infamous for being extremely powerful magi in House Moon and Star. How many have been reported to be killed in all the years we have been at war? We killed many unicorns from their house, we've slain their toops, but an Inquisitor?
"They burn our trees, our troops, the very forest screams in agony when they let loose their inferno magics. And now one is dead, unable to fight another day, especially in this upcoming battle, in which we know could traverse over the river and against our forest.
"Therefore," he continued, feeling that now he was either doomed or proving his point, so he might as well say it all, "we should consider the efforts of those who died to be victorious, in slaying one of the Inquisitors. To think of it as anything else would be insulting to the ultimate sacrifice they made in claiming this victory."
He bowed at the final statement, finally being able to look away from that horrible, horrible Stare; it didn't make him feel any less uncomfortable. The forest, normally a hodgepodge of noise, was dead silent.
Vine Whip feared he would be soon too, but at least he said his piece.
"You may rise, Pack Leader," Lady Fluttershy said. When he did, the green glow in her eyes was gone, her normal eyes back. "There is much logic in what you say; we should remember our fallen for what they achieved."
Lady Fluttershy glanced over at the most injured wildling, who now had the Everfree Wraiths staring him down again. Pack Leader Vine Whip nervously glanced between her and the wildling, and thus was rather startled when a new voice joined in the conversation.
"My Lady Fluttershy of Everfree," Zecora said, approaching the leader of House Everfree, "I have information to give to thee."
Vine Whip scampered out of the way for Zecora of the Northern Zebra Tribes. He took a moment to admire how she appeared, truly a remarkable representative of their house. The vine wraps, the shaman gear made from the strongest wood and twine, and just her exotic beauty made Vine Whip forget his problems for a few seconds.
What Zecora said brought him crashing back to reality. "House Earthborn is moving towards the Shattered Care River. Thousands of troops strong, they plan to deliver."
"House Earthborn, and House Moon and Star, marching together towards New Ponyville," Lady Fluttershy said. "Is this yet another battle for the city?"
"It may more than that, it may not be just the two in this spat," Zecora lifted the leafy veil that covered her face, then pulled her hood back to look her leader in the eye; her own pupils glowed slightly, a haunting goldenrod.
"The scent of pegasi, in the sky… the feel of corruption, when the Cult causes disruption… even a whiff of greed, of those who are hired for dirty deeds…"
"We might be dealing with every house in this battle," Fluttershy said. "Tomorrow may be the start of a six-way battle… Zecora, Vine Whip, what do you think we should do?"
The two exchanged glances, as the one zebra who had been treating Vine's injuries started to do so again, now that she knew Vine Whip was not going to die. "Well, my Lady," he said, "I would not recommend attacking full force, at least not at first."
"I see what the pack leader is saying, and I agree," Zecora said. "Pick them off, snipe from afar, then flank and attack without mercy."
"House Moon and Star does not know of the tunnels, the scout party was killed," Vine pointed out. "If the battle carries on, we could attack them from the back!"
Lady Fluttershy nodded. "I agree, it was what I was thinking. The trouble is, it will take some time for me to rally the Mindbreakers, and our troops that specialize in such hit-and-run tactics are not present.
"I will need your troops to be able to start the attack tomorrow, as scouting and hit-and-run." She motioned towards the Everfree Wraiths. "They will assist you; your word is my word to them for the time being."
"Yes, My Lady. Thank you."
"Will those of your pack be ready by tomorrow morning?"
He glanced at his surviving pack members. The pegasus now with one wing saluted with that single appendage as the zebra continued to treat his stump. The unicorn winced, but nodded. The earth ponies, as well as the other pack members, all gave the same encouraging gusto.
The only one to falter was the three-legged wildling, who tried to show support but almost collapsed. The Everfree Wraiths started to close in again, licking their chops and growling hungrily, but Fluttershy gave them the order to stop.
"A pack can only move as fast as its slowest," she said, turning to Vine Whip. Her eyes were not glowing, but stern and judging. "In the wild, no amount of enthusiasm or bravery can save an injured animal.
"I need your pack to begin the assault, Vine Whip. Everfree needs you all. The Wraiths are hungry, and they need to be fed; we have no meat on us, no rations they will eat except… prey."
Her gaze fell on the crippled wildling. "I do not take joy in this, but necessity is stronger than a pony's preference. What would you do, Vine Whip?"
Vine Whip shook as if struck. He stared at the earth wildling, feeling more thunderstruck than when Lady Fluttershy stared him down. The crippled pony wasn't even shaking as much as him.
Very slowly, the injured one nodded to his pack leader. Vine Whip swallowed hard, then said, "Like you said, Fluttershy… necessity trumps a pony's own preference. It must be done."
"Very well."
Lady Fluttershy gestured to the Everfree Wraiths, and hissed, "Feed."
The predator ponies, more fierce and vicious than a pack of hyenas, let out slobbering barks as they lunged. The three-legged pony had collapsed before their razor teeth tore into him, but even resignation didn't stop him from screaming in agony as he was torn apart.
Pack Leader Vine Whip couldn't prevent hearing the screams, or the sound of the pony being feasted on. He walked away, talking to the one-winged pegasus as a diversion. Zecora watched this, and turned to Lady Fluttershy.
"He is still not able to embrace the true side of the wild," she said to her leader. "Perhaps being promoted to pack leader was too early for one this mild."
"Do not be so hard on him," Lady Fluttershy said as she too walked away from the carnage. "That was his brother."
They walked from the clearing, up to a small hill that allowed them to see the edge of Everfree Forest. With eagle eyes, one could see the beginning of Ghastly Gorge. Fluttershy had such vision, but she couldn't see what she was truly staring at: New Ponyville, a great distance away.
"I pride myself in knowing about my followers, those who have joined us despite the sacrifice it entails," she said to Zecora. "The five who died," a pause, then a small sigh, "six, six who died, it was for slaying one special troop and a scouting mission.
"It has been three years since we managed to successfully expand the forest. Three years, and it feels like three decades. I must maintain my composure and not order a full-out assault, or we will be as badly injured as that scouting patrol."
"We always did have to play it safe," Zecora stated. "The times we wait, it does indeed chafe. But we started off as a collection of outcasts and waifs.
"Now," she gestured her ebony hoof towards the forest's clearing, "we have the strongest beasts, the fastest packs. Our troops more than make up for in ferocity where in numbers they lack. So do not think we are up against the wall on our back…"
"Because all will tremble," Fluttershy finished, "when Everfree attacks."
She let the power of nature course through her, and then let out a howl that rivaled the mightiest wolf. It was not a battle call, nor a mourning cry, but a message that said, "We are here, and we are strong."
Howls erupted throughout the forest, not only of wolves, but any creature. The wildling ponies and feral equine cried out, zebras pleated, minotaurs roared, and nature itself seemed to tremor from the force.
Tomorrow, Everfree would spill blood. And Lady Fluttershy hoped it tasted delicious to her followers.


"I do not know what to make of this wub," Zecora admitted to Vinyl. "Or am I getting it wrong, is this dub?"

"No no, it's not called dub, it's called dubstep!"

Night was approaching Ponyville, as Luna took charge of Equestria in place of her sister. The foals had all started to nod off, and thus were taken home by family or friends.

Big Mac and Cheerilee took most of the kids home, Rarity's father took Sweetie Belle to their house, and Thunderlane left with his sleepy brother (and many watched that fine flank of Thunderlane's as he left). Amethyst took her little sister home, letting her mom and Doctor Whooves stay for a little longer.

Spike managed to stay awake for a little longer than the foals, but eventually started to nod off. Twilight took him home real fast, as he protested amid several yawns that he was still capable of partying on. With the kids asleep at their homes, it now became a full-blown adults' party!

"Extra frosting on the cupcakes~," Pinkie Pie declared, serving them with such enthusiasm that she was practically throwing them.

Berry Punch had crashed on Pinkie's sofa upstairs, with Colgate trying to sober her up. Cloud Kicker had stopped trying to hit on Apple Fritter, what with both Blossomforth and Applejack watching, and instead was flirting with Roseluck, Daisy, and Lily; she did have bravado, and probably more optimism than Pinkie.

All of the family members were talking to each other, and not just about their daughters, sisters, or cousins that were the main six ponies of the party. Vinyl Scratch was working the music, and tried to play one of her favorite songs.

Clover! Whoa-oh-ohh-ohhhhhhoh!
She was in the right, she wasn't dumb
More cleverer than Princess Platinum…
Clover! Whoa-oh-ohhhhh-ohhhh-ohhhhh-

Pinkie hurried over to stop the song. "No no no! Rarity hates that historical song, she thinks it's biased towards the Princess!"

"But even Princess Platinum admitted in history that Clover was-"

"Yeah, Rarity's been strong about that since she played the Princess during the pageant."

Vinyl shrugged. "Alrighty, got you, girl. We'll have to play something else. What have you got?"

"Classical music, polkas, and "Weird Corral" Flankovic."

"You still like "Weird Corral" Flankovic?"

Pinkie pumped her hooves up in the air, and shouted, "NO ONE SHOULD EVER TIRE OF THE FLANKOVIC!"

Rarity walked as she made that declaration, and chuckled. "Vinyl dear, you'll never convince her otherwise."

"Oh I know, she and I are big fans, I just wanted to see if she'd do the declaration again."

Rarity raised one of her perfectly groomed eyebrows. "I see. Well, darling, it has been wonderful to have you here, meeting Pinkie's travel companion that brought her to us. Tell me, though, where will you be performing next?"

Vinyl hissed in a nervous breath, scratching the back of her head. "Um, yeah, I don't know."

"What?" both Pinkie and Rarity asked in unison.

"To be honest, I don't know what my next gig is going to be. Things are a little… complicated for me, I didn't want to say anything, but I knew sooner or later, Pinkie would drag it out of me."

"But," Pinkie Pie exclaimed, then calmed down so others wouldn't overhear. She quickly put on "Weird Corral" Flankovic to cover up the noise.

"Vinyl, what's going on?" she asked more gently, surprising for any pony who didn't know that Pinkie could have that side to her. "Are you having financial problems? Booking gigs?"

"That's the thing, Pinkie, I'm not having that kind of trouble, I'm just," she sighed, and finally spat out what was bothering her. "I would really like to have a place to live. I have been living in hotels and random places, and… I kind of want to have a real place."

She gestured to the party, where every pony and zebra were talking, dancing, or eating, all enjoying themselves. "I mean, I want to have a real social circle, like you do. I can run my DJ business from a real home."

Pinkie let out a gasp with enough wind power, it pulled the needle on the record player, causing "Weird Corral" Flankovic's song skip back to the first chorus. This caused Rarity's dad to crash when he tried to dance to the music change.

"Vinyl, you," Pinkie stammered in excitement. "Do you want to live here? In Ponyville?"

"Is there any room in your place for a second attendant?"

Pinkie's face fell so hard, it was practically audible. "Oh, Vinyl, that's not possible, Mr. and Mrs. Cake have used up all available room for the babies. My room's rather small, I couldn't fit you in."

"Is there anything available in Ponyville otherwise?"

Rarity tapped her chin. "Well darling, Roseluck knows that best. I'll go ask her."

As Vinyl and Pinkie waited for her, they watched the party. The DJ was used to total strangers rocking as loud, booming music shook the dance floor as much as the dancing hooves did; this felt a little better to her.

Cadence and Shining were having a dance, despite how silly the song was, with his parents sharing one right next to them. Derpy and the Doctor were sharing a dance; actually, it was mostly him trying to make sure she didn't crash into anyone. Big McLargehooves had gathered the courage to ask Blossomforth to dance, and she had politely accepted.

Applejack was sharing her second dance with Twilight Sparkle, spinning her unicorn friend around. The reason for multiple dances was mostly because, as Twilight's best friends knew, the lavender unicorn became a dance nightmare to behold if she was dancing by herself. Thus, any pony available needed to dance with her to not have her scare ponies.

Rarity was done talking to Roseluck, and returned to Vinyl and Pinkie, pausing only once to glare at Cloud Kicker when the flirtatious pegasus brushed the seamstress's flank with her tail. The look on her face when she approached did not spark confidence in the party pony and DJ unicorn.

"Vinyl, I'm sorry to say there's only a two-pony house available. It's a really nice place too, so unless you make a considerable amount of bits, I doubt you could afford it on your own."

The DJ sighed, then blow her lightning blue bangs off her forehead. "Aw well, maybe if something opens up. Keep me posted, Pinkie?"

With how important the conversation was, it was no surprise that Pinkie missed who came in the front door. The first to notice her was actually Lyra and Bonbon, near the door.

"See, you're having a good time," Lyra was saying to her soulmate. "You really seem to like Fluttershy's parents."

"Yeah, I guess so." Bonbon snacked on another extra-frosted cupcake. "They really are nice ponies."

"It reflects on their daughter. You should try to get over that trash incident, Bonbony, she's apologized so many times for that."

"I know, I know! I don't like how I'm holding a grudge so much, I want to make myself better," she was saying when she spotted who came through the door. The candy maker blinked several times, shaking her head as if trying to clear it.

"Bonbon? Something wrong? Did you take another one of those experimental candies?" Lyra frowned at her. "Last time, it made your voice sound like a grizzled fisher-stallion. It was not fun hearing you sweet talk like that-"

"Lyra, look at who just arrived."

The mint unicorn glanced over where her soulmate pointed her hoof, and then her eyes bulged. Octavia was glancing around, trying to find some pony. She adjusted her bow tie, appearing nervous of maybe being overdressed.

"Oh sweet Celestia, is that Octavia?" Lyra whispered in surprise. "Octavia of the band Philharmonica? The greatest classical music artist in the greatest band ever? My musical role model?"

"Why are you telling me what I've known since the day I met you," Bonbon whispered right back in response, "when you could be getting her autograph?"

"Oh, do I dare talk to her? Am I worthy? Can I?"

"Lyra, move your flank over there, and-"

"TAVI!!"

An extremely happy, pink blur leapt over Caramel, Rainbow Dash's mom, Flitter, and Berry Punch (who had come down to sober up). Octavia once again positioned herself and caught her sister without being slammed down painfully to the floor.

"You came! I cannot believe you made it! This is so surprising! I've never been so surprised, except for when I saw you come in, and then I was all like I was the time I first met Twilight-"

"Glad to be here, Pinkie," Octavia interrupted her rant with politeness, a trick she had learned when growing up with her.

"My big sister at one of my parties since the days on the farm! I'm so happy! Come! There's some pony I want you meet!"

"Wait, 'sister'?" Lyra repeated to Bonbon. "Octavia, the greatest classical artist ever, is Pinkie Pie's big sister?"

The mint unicorn slumped on her hind knees, face-hoofing in regret. "I'm a horrible friend! Pinkie knows everything about us, she always is so nice, and I don't even know who her sister is!"

"Lyra, don't beat yourself up. Tell you what!"

Bonbon rested her hooves on Lyra's shoulders. "I will go home real quick, grab all of your Philharmonica records, and bring them here. Just go talk to her!"

"Oh thank you!" She hugged her soulmate, shaking a little with excitement. "Thank you, thank you!"

"The sooner you let go, the sooner I can talk to her!"

Pinkie Pie was bouncing around, trying to find Vinyl, who had gone to use the bathroom. Rarity, meanwhile, took time to chat up the more fancy of the Pie sisters.

"So darling, I know Pinkie didn't ask, because she's just too thrilled to see you, but what happened to your concert?" the seamstress asked, tilting her head to the side. "Did something happen?"

"It was cancelled. One of the downsides of being a classical band, in this day and age, you unfortunately need to worry you'll be replaced by the hip and new."

Octavia sighed as she sat down next to the record player, glancing at it "Weird Corral" Flankovic continued his mad, crazy parodies. "But, truth be told, I probably would have cancelled it anyway."

"What? Why on Equestria would you do that, dear?"

"I miss my sister too much. After I met all of you, and saw how happy she was, I thought about how much I didn't want to miss this party. So it was kind of the silver lining of the cloud I could make it."

Rarity nodded, though she didn't understand fully. Then again, she mentally noted that Octavia and Pinkie Pie had been living apart for years, and she was still seeing Sweetie Belle on a near-daily basis.

With her best understanding-though-not-entirely smile, Rarity said, "I think I get you, dear. You miss her a lot. And she sure missed you; she mostly talks about you since we visited your concert."

"Thank you, I-"

"Tavi," Pinkie Pie exclaimed, popping up in front of the two posh ponies, "meet my traveling buddy when I left the farm, Vinyl Scratch!"

She pulled the grinning DJ over, and, since Pinkie Pie hadn't told Vinyl about who her sister was either, the reaction of astonishment on both sides was equal in height, but different in tone.

Octavia knew who Vinyl Scratch was, or more so who DJ Pon-3 was. She was one of the most well-known DJs who specialized in dubstep, remixes, and other forms of music that didn't involve, in Octavia's opinion, real instruments. All of the problems she and her band were having problems with were because of these crazy, new styles of music.

Vinyl Scratch knew who Octavia was, and she almost knocked her sunglasses off with her eyes bulged out.

"Octavia is your sister?" Vinyl asked, correcting those bright blue shades. "You're THE Octavia?"

"Yes, she is," Pinkie cheerfully exclaimed. "I told you my sister played classical music."

"You didn't tell me she was one of the best music artists of our time!"

Vinyl took Octavia's hoof and shook it vigorously, so much that her own sunglasses really fell off this time; Pinkie Pie caught them as her DJ friend carried on.

"I'm a big fan of your work," she was gushing to the rather surprised Tavi. "I've even been to some of your concerts! It's an honor to meet you!"

"Um, thanks," said the normally-not-shocked shocked Octavia. Her violet eyes were blinking like crazy, as if not entirely believing what she was seeing. Her ears even flopped around a bit, as proof she couldn't believe she was hearing this too.

"You two get acquainted," Pinkie said, "I'll go get some food for you two… still like coconut shavings on your cupcakes, Tavi-Lavi?"

"Yes… and please don't call me that."

As Pinkie bounced off, Rarity looked between the two music artists. "Well now, we have Pinkie's sister and her traveling companion. This is rather fascinating."

"I think it's amazing," Vinyl said, "that we haven't met until now. Maybe we both had to become accomplished first, or something?"

Rarity chuckled, while Octavia continued to stare. She knew it wasn't sophisticated, or even the least bit polite, and yet she couldn't stop herself. Here was the pony that helped her sister make her way when she left home, the same pony that was, in many aspects, the bane of a classical music artist like her.

And she was nice too.

"You seem pretty shocked there, Octavia. Do I have something on my face?" Vinyl joked. Though when she really looked at that astonishment, she started to understand what it was about. Sighing, she said, "I guess you weren't expecting a DJ like me, huh? I kind of know what classical artists and uptown folk think of me."

"Darling, don't start that," Rarity scolded her. "I'm sure Octavia doesn't think of you that way."

"Well, if she does, it's okay," Vinyl shrugged, then tapped the side of the record player. "See, I do work these babies, and the big booming stereos more, I guess that's the stereotype that I fall into."

"I," Octavia found her voice, "I didn't mean to imply when I was quiet, that…"

Rarity's eyes darted between the two, trying to figure out what to say to make things more at ease. She knew this kind of awkward: it was how she and Applejack first met when Rarity set up shop in Ponyville.

"Look, Octavia, Vinyl," she said, placing her hooves on their shoulders, "we all come from different backgrounds, and it's a little awkward at first. But you two both love Pinkie, and honestly, that says a lot about you."

The fashionista tittered over her own joke, and added, "So why don't you two just shove aside the awkwardness, and enjoy yourselves?"

Vinyl grinned at the offer. "Why not? Tell me, Octavia, did you bring any instruments? We could jam together!"

"No, I didn't… you play?"

"I know a few instruments, including the cello and the accordion," she said.

"Really? You play instruments that much?"

"It's how I got my Cutie Mark," Vinyl said, patting her flank right on the music note mark. "Got it when I discovered I loved to make music."

"Oh my, I would have assumed," Octavia caught herself and stopped, but Vinyl knew where it was going. She even chuckled at this.

"What, that it would have been a record or something? Naw, I wasn't scratching those babies when I got this mark. It takes musical talents to be a real DJ, to understand it, to really curve tunes out and not make a bunch of mess…"

She was pantomiming with enthusiasm, until both Rarity and Octavia chuckled at her gusto. "I admit, that was what I thought at first," the cellist said, "but I guess I was just being ignorant."

"That's the spirit," Rarity gushed. "Now, why don't you two share a dance or something? You'll have to dance with Twilight to keep the dear from dancing with herself, customary for a party here. Now go on, I'll put on something more fitting!"

Vinyl's grin grew even more as she gestured Octavia to the dance floor, and the cellist accepted with a smile. Rarity took off "Weird Corral" Flankovic, and picked one of the records she had given Pinkie a long time ago: a classical ballroom jazz collection.

Soon, more dignified (but less weird, sadly) music played. Octavia and Vinyl started to dance, with Vinyl leading, and trying hard not to bump into Twilight and Applejack. Other ponies danced about, with partners or just alone for fun.

Berry Punch was trying to dance alone, when she nearly crashed into the ponies who entered recently. Parish Nadermane was nearly knocked over, and growled at the drunk mare.

"Will you watch it?" he barked.

"I'm shorry," Berry apologized, wobbling as she tried to stand upright, "but pleashe, don't tell me to go home. Everypony's alwaysh telling me to go home! It ain't right!"

She threw herself on Parish, sobbing loudly. The other band members stared awkwardly, Symphony trying hard not to giggle. As Frederic tried to pull Berry off, Colgate trotted over to help.

"Berry? Berry, what are you doing?" the dentist pony asked, pulling her friend off of the musician. "Berry, why'd you come down here, you're supposed to be sobering up."

"I wanted to have fun!"

"I am so sorry about her," Colgate said to Parish. "She just had too much to drink."

"Village drunk, I should have expected one here," Parish muttered, almost pushing Colgate and Berry aside as he moved into Sugarcube Corner.

Concerto and Frederic also moved passed her, with only Symphony pausing. She motioned as if to apologized, then sighed and trotted on.

Rainbow Dash's parents almost crashed into Concerto as they passed through the dance floor. Apple Fritter winked at Frederic, giving the music artist the impression of some country hick coming onto him. Parish caught a glimpse of Cadence talking to Rarity's parents, and was particularly astonished.

"What is the princess doing here in this dump?" he said aloud, some of the guests overhearing him.

"I do not know, maybe she has family here," Symphony guessed.

"What's that say about the state of the world, when even princesses have relatives in sad, little towns like this? Seriously, it's giving me a headache being here."

"It's cheery enough," Frederic tried to reason. "But yes, I wouldn't want to live here. Feels dirty, with no roads, just dirt paths on the way here."

"I'm surprised a train stop was even here," Concerto grumbled. "Is this place even on the map?"

"Whatever," Parish muttered, ignoring the glare he was getting from Carrot Top, who overheard the impolite banter. "Let's just get Octavia, and get-"

He stopped when he saw who was at the far end of the dance floor; the view had been blocked by Twilight and Applejack swinging around like a couple dancing lunatics. Octavia was dancing with Vinyl Scratch, and all of the band members knew who the DJ was; after all, banners of her being displayed on theaters and concerts they had wanted to play at seemed to be mocking them.

"YOU," Parish shouted, startling almost every pony and zebra at the party. Octavia and Vinyl stopped dancing immediately, and the cellist was more than a little surprised to see her band.

"Oh, you came?" she asked with the utmost simplicity. "Was it on the train after mine?"

"How could you do this, Octavia?" Frederic asked, getting between Parish and her before their harpist would lose his temper. "You know DJ Pon-3?"

"I just met her today, she's a friend of my sister."

"Hi," Vinyl said, grinning and waving her hoof at them. "I'm a big fan of your band, and-"

"Shut up," Parish snarled at the DJ. "You… you artless rogue, you've seriously crossed a line now!"

"What," was all a very surprised, and slightly hurt, Vinyl could muster.

Parish trotted over to Octavia, and hissed, "Do you want to know what we did when we went off on your merry way to this backwater village? We were actually trying to find a place for us to play!"

Symphony rolled her eyes as she said, "Didn't do us a lot of good. Every place from Appleloosa to Saint Trottersburg has been booked full!"

"No thanks to DJs like this pony," Concerto added, gesturing towards Vinyl. "Apparently, there is a big movement going around."

"Excuse me," Rarity said, trotting up to them with a concerned frown. "But what's going on? Where are your manners… oh! Octavia's band?"

"Excuse me, but," Frederic snapped at her, "we are not her band. She may be the lead, but we are all credited music artists."

"My apologies," Rarity said, being as sociable as possible. "But please, we are trying to have a civil party here."

"Yes, we could tell with the drunks and hicks we marched by," Parish scoffed. "Nice place."

"Excuse me, but-"

"And you're a rather sad attempt at trying to be a lady. That dress you are wearing, it looks hoof-stitched… by a donkey."

Rarity felt her eye twitch at such an insult. She would have fired back, but caught herself with Octavia standing next to her. Symphony cleared her throat, and said, "My apologies, we didn't have a fun train ride, and he's grumpy."

The train ride had consisted of a consistently crying, and amazingly loud, foal. Not to mention the snack trolley guy accidentally knocked a tray of donuts on Parish, and Concerto lost the book he had brought for the trip. They were all on the edge, and needed to vent.

"Don't apologize for me, Symphony," Parish snapped at her. "I will not have you acting like I am a child!"

"Maybe if you stop acting like one-"

"Shut up!"

"You keep calm," Frederic said to the harpist. "This may not be a particularly sophisticated town, but we can at least be civil."

"Aw, civility be damned," Concerto snapped. "You're too polite, it's what is costing us our careers."

"Oh, I am ruining our careers? You were the last one to pitch a fit with-"

"Will you all stop?" Octavia said. "You are all guests here, and you're acting extremely rude."

The bandmates all glared at each other, Vinyl and Rarity watching nervously. Parish glanced over at them, particularly at the DJ unicorn. "You know, it shouldn't surprise me to see you dancing with some pony who's pretty much our enemy."

"Wait, I'm not the enemy," Vinyl exclaimed. "Come on, dude, I love your work-"

"I really, really don't want to hear it. You're just mocking us, aren't you? Mocking us that we are desperately struggling to make our living, to advance our careers; meanwhile, you put a record on the spinner and consider yourself an artist.

"I'd spit on you if you were worth it."

Octavia was in Parish's face in a second. "How dare you. You have gone too far. I have had it with your attitude."

"I have had it with yours, Octavia. You go prancing off to a party when everything falls apart on us. I am entirely, utterly, and unashamedly sick of you."

"Hey hay, everypony," Pinkie chirped as she returned, balancing a small tray of cupcakes on her back. "Oh hey, is this-"

"You have always tried to be a figure of sophistication, but it's obvious now that you're dancing with some DJ skank like this," Parish continued, "that you are actually a sell-out, a high-priced whore."

Rarity's gasp of shock was muffled by the sound of the cupcake tray crashing on the floor. When Parish turned to see what the noise was, he received a pink hoof in the face, sending him sprawling across the room and into the record player. The song was cut off with a record scratch, as the harpist slumped on the floor in a daze.

Pinkie Pie glared him down, the blue pupils in her eyes replaced with a fiery, irate yellow. "Do not," she hollered, "ever talk about Tavi or Vinyl that way! EVER!!"

Parish was relatively dazed, but he regained his anger quickly. He glared first at Pinkie, who was being held back by Vinyl, then at Octavia.

"Your sister… just hit me."

The cellist didn't respond, and he continued to stare her down as he got to his hooves. Every pony and zebra was looking between him and Pinkie Pie, wondering what could have made the sweet, party girl punch some pony.

"I've had it," Parish snarled as he approached Octavia, though keeping a safe distance from Pinkie. "I've had it with all of you."

"Octavia," Frederic, recovering from the shock of what happened, "your sister has gone too far. Even if Parish was kind of asking for it."

Parish glared daggers at the pianist. "You and your… that's the last straw! You can go rot, for all I care. I quit this band!"

"What?" Pinkie exclaimed, the fire in her eyes dying instantly. "No!"

"Parish," Frederic said, "you-"

"My career would be so much farther without you all! I'd be leagues ahead, if I wasn't being pulled down by you all, especially you, Frederic. You always were the weakest link, with your shoddy piano playing."

"My piano playing is suburb!" Frederic shook his hoof at him. "Maybe this is what I needed as well! I had it, I'm embarking on my own."

"Wait, stop," Pinkie tried to plead.

"You all cannot do this," Concerto muttered. "If any pony was going to leave this sinking ship, it would have been me."

The three stallions appeared to be ready to have it out with each other, then made an attempt to leave first before the others. Symphony sighed, and muttered, "That's too bad, guess I have to go on my own too."

She glanced over at Octavia, leaving one final comment, "You know, you and your family just split apart the band. I hope you're happy, we just came to talk. Good-bye, Octavia, good luck wherever you can possibly get work these days."

She trotted off as the three former bandmates all struggled to get to the door first. When they stomped off, they knocked over Bonbon, spilling the records she was carrying.

"Hey, watch it," she snapped at them. "Bunch of jerks, what's your problem?"

Inside Sugarcube Corner, the party was completely silent, every pony and zebra muttering about what that was all about. Some of them knew the band Philharmonica, and were startled that their break-up happened here, of all places.

"I cannot believe they could be so rude," Derpy was saying to Doctor Whooves, who nodded. "I… I hate it when ponies act like that."

The Doctor embraced her in a comforting hug, as Braeburn glanced outside, seeing the band members storm off. He turned to the nearest pony, who happened to be a zebra, and said, "Maybe Ah should go an' lasso them, bring them back? We should try ta talk some sense inta those city folks."

"It would do little good, it's not just that they're not from this neighborhood," Zecora noted somberly. "The blind, dear Braeburn, aren't the only ones who cannot see. They are clouded by, shall we say, shades of vanity."

"Ain't that the kick in the head truth," he replied, sighing.

Speaking of shades, Vinyl saw her shades lying on the ground, having been dropped by Pinkie Pie. She picked them up, but didn't put them back on. Glancing at Octavia, seeing the shock on her face, she didn't know what to say.

"Oh darling," Rarity, who had gathered her wits sooner, hugged Octavia tight. "Darling, I am so sorry! Oh, that was so uncouth of them, bordering barbarism. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she managed to say. "I… I am fine. To be truthful, I saw this coming a long time ago. It's not surprising, really."

She let out a big sigh, then glanced to her side. "Pinkie, are you okay? … Pinkie?"

Pinkie wasn't there. The three of them looked around, and saw the party pony running upstairs, sobbing. Rarity gasped, then faced Octavia again.

"Octavia, dear, you need to talk to your sister."

"What? But-"

"Darling, I know you know her best, she's your sister and all," Rarity said, gesturing towards the stairs, "but Pinkie Pie can be very sensitive, especially about the feelings of those she cares about. And can't you see?

"She blames herself for what just happened."

"What? No, it's not her fault-"

"But she doesn't know that. Please, go up and talk to her, she needs you now."

Octavia glanced at the stairs, then looked back at Rarity, and managed a small smile. "You really are a good friend of hers, Rarity. Thank you."

"I do what I can, Octavia."

Octavia headed upstairs as Rarity and Vinyl watched her. The DJ whispered, "Are you sure this is okay? You don't think Octavia is actually really mad at Pinks?"

"Trust me, I know about these things."


"You may enter."
Fancy Pants, dressed in his armor, made his entrance into the most royal room in all of Manehattan. He quickly surveyed his surroundings.
Their leader, the pinnacle mistress ,was sitting at her grand throne, watching him and waiting. Her guards stood at attention at her sides and at the door, though they didn't feel the need to stay alert with the General of all ponies. A diamond dog in enhanced plate armor, the mistress's elite bodyguard, was watching with more intensity.
To the side, Sweetie Belle was watching while combing her mane. When General Fancy Pants nodded to her, she gave him a pleasant smile and waved at him. He wondered briefly if she was preparing for a performance tonight, she certainly was dressed and groomed for it.
"You have something to ask of me, General Fancy Pants?" said the pony seated in the extremely ornate throne.
"Yes, Mistress Rarity, my apologies for hesitation," he said, approaching her and bowing. "I have had quite an ordeal today, debating with delegates from three Houses."
"They seem particularly interested in our services," Mistress Rarity said. She rose from her throne, walking around as she spoke. Her tail gently caressed Fancy Pants's side, a habit of hers when she managed to speak with him without his wife present. "Did you come to any deals with them?"
"No, I figured that would have been impertinent without consulting with you, my lady."
"You are too thoughtful, but I don't think you need to come to me for every business deal involving our mercenaries."
"Except that, as you said, they're particularly interested. I even suspect the House Earthborn representative was here unofficially."
Rarity rubbed the bottom of her chin with her good foreleg, until she accidentally bumped some of the crystalitis forming on her jawline. Frowning in disgust, she stomped her good hoof down and glanced over at Sweetie Belle.
"What do you think of this, Sweetie?"
The singer flinched in surprise. "Me? Um, well, if House Earthborn came unofficially… maybe it's the politicians of the house who want support and not Applejack?"
"That's what I was thinking," Rarity said, smiling at her sister. She pranced around Fancy Pants more, and said, "Did any of the representatives seem desperate? The ones from Stormwing, or Moon & Star, were they as pleading?"
"They all seemed equally earnest, but kept their composure. It would be my suggestion that we let them hire some of our mercenaries each, to maintain our standing."
Rarity shook her head, trotting back to her throne. "No, let them stir on it. This battle is obviously going to last a while, maybe weeks. I want them to squirm before I give them support."
"My lady Rarity, is that wise?"
Many ponies would rather break their own limbs than call out Mistress Rarity. The rumors of what happened to those that caused trouble in Manehattan was enough to provoke nightmares.
Fortunately, Fancy Pants was not just any pony. His question merely made Mistress Rarity chuckle.
"Oh my dear sweet Fancy Pants," she said as she seated herself. "How long has this war been going? How long has House Whitegold been playing the nice child of the war, giving out troops and supplies to the houses when they asked for it?"
"If we tantalize the three houses, we might lose the neutral status we have maintained for so long."
"I am aware of that, but I am also believing that if we cannot be aggressive, House Whitegold may belong to some pony else in a few years. The Cult of Laughter is growing most uncomfortably fast, Everfree Forest is getting so big, and now three warmongering houses are going to be fighting in a free-for-all soon.
"I would like to monitor this fight. Send some of your best troops to monitor… and possibly assassinate some of the figures there, I want to hurt the other houses anonymously." She twirled her crystalized foreleg, humming in thought. "Maybe ask your wife to assist in this case."
"I am afraid I do not know where she is, Mistress Rarity."
"Oh dear, Fleur de Lis is being off doing who knows what again?" Rarity tittered at first, then threw her head back and sighed. "I used to respect your wife, Fancy Pants, I really did. But one cannot respect a lady who doesn't act like a lady."
General Fancy Pants didn't answer, he stared down at the high-quality carpet of the room. Sweetie Belle approached him, a fair smile on her face. "Would you need help from the Nighthooves," she offered, "or the Praetorponies, sir Fancy Pants?"
"No, but thank you, Lady Belle," he replied. "My best troops, some of the finest soldiers, spies, and assassins one could ask for, will suffice in the lady's request."
"Reliable as always, Fancy Pants," Rarity praised her. "You may go now."
Fancy Pants bowed to her, and started to leave. He stopped, then turned back. "Mistress Rarity, there were two concerns I had on mind."
"Two? My my, you have been busy."
"You mentioned the cult's activities, and I believe there may be a strong influence in some of the districts other than the Undercity."
"I'm sorry, but I don't believe that. Our guards and troops would know if the cult's influence was there. You are the patron of The Wall, so if they are inside the city, you haven't been doing your job; and I know you have, I have faith in you, Fancy Pants.
"The slums, that blasted Undercity," she clenched her crystalized foreleg, and something resembling diamond scratching diamond echoed throughout the room, I want you to double your efforts. And do not be so lenient like I know you have been. If you are not more rough with your investigations, I will send Constable Hoity Toity to inspect. And you and I both know he will not be gentle with his search."
Fancy Pants nodded with a tight-lipped frown. "And the other issue I had was the growing concern of the… auctions in the District of Delight-"
"No, Fancy Pants. We have gone over this before."
"But my lady, the kidnapping numbers have been rising-"
"Numbers mostly in the Undercity, and I'm sorry. I do not like the idea of young mares being 'sold,' but they are sold as servants. Your imagination is what leads you to believe they are sex slaves or the like."
Fancy Pants didn't budge, but his frown grew. "My concerns are still strong, my lady."
"I know they are, Fancy Pants. But rest assured, when the day comes where we do not need this source of income and moral for our city, I will eliminate it. You are dismissed, my dear."
"Yes, Mistress Rarity."
When the General left the room, Rarity motioned for the guards to leave too. Only the diamond dog bodyguard and Sweetie Belle remained, and the House Whitegold gestured for her sister to come over.
"He is growing too soft," Rarity said, staring at the door to her spacious chambers. "He is more concerned about prostitution and possible slaves than the war."
"He fears for the rumors that young mares are being auctioned off into terrible lives," Sweetie assured him. "His daughters are coming of age, you should understand his concern."
"How did he ever have children with that frigid pony?" Rarity muttered. "I would have been much better for him, a real stallion like that deserves a real mare. If Fleur de Lis wasn't so good at what she did, I would-"
"Rarity, don't."
Sweetie Belle lay her hoof gently on Rarity's shoulder, her good one. The two sisters stared at each other for a moment, before Rarity spoke. "You have grown up so beautifully, Sweetie Belle. I would do anything to have your beauty."
"You are still beautiful, sis."
"Do not contradict me, I hate that so much."
Rarity rested her crystalized hoof on her forehead, the diamond scratching sound echoing again. She hissed in frustration at the noise, and muttered, "I hate the other houses so much. They keep pushing me, pushing me to act, when I am trying to make a life for myself."
"Rarity-"
"It ends today," she hissed. "The tunnels are growing, our army is growing, and they are tearing themselves apart. Today, we join the war, unofficially of course. I will not allow House Whitegold to be brought down, I will only see it rise."
"Such plans will take time, Rarity."
"Indeed… and I have the patience. With you by my side, Sweetie Belle, I could wait another fifteen years."
The two sisters hugged, but it was cut short when Rarity violently shivered. Sweetie looked over her in concern, and asked, "Is it acting up?"
"The crystalitis doesn't hurt normally, this is," she shivered again, grinding her teeth, "unusual. Maybe aggression is something that triggered it? Either way, could you…?"
"Of course, sis."
Sweetie Belle's horn glowed green, and soothing healing magic spread over the crystalized coating that had grown from Rarity, from her horn down to her left foreleg. The feeling of the restomancy spell usually helped, a little, but tonight wasn't the same for Rarity.
For in her mind, she was plotting of how she could properly manipulate the three houses that were at least civilized enough to bargain with. She was planning on how she could use her forces to, in the long run, gain some more ground. She was thinking of how she could motivate Manehattan to be ready for such bloodshed and violence.
And most of all, she wondered what she was going to do with her former friends if she ever got her hooves on their hides.


Octavia had only once been to Ponyville before this day, when she visited Pinkie Pie after she had moved in to Sugarcube Corner. Thus, she knew where her room was.

Pinkie was lying on her bed, sobbing and covering her face. Octavia knocked on the door, but it went unnoticed. The musician walked in anyway, and sat down on the bed next to her sister.

Pinkie didn't even feel the first caress of her older sister's hoof to her poofy mane. After a few strokes, she finally did notice her sister there.

"My band was bound to split up for weeks," Octavia said. Her voice was steady and calm, as she continued to pet her sister's mane. "They had lost sight of what was important a long time ago."

"But… but… I hit that stallion, and he quit because of me!"

"No, you were just an excuse for him to quit. Parish had been acting unbearably rude with us, and our clients. I know you wouldn't understand this, but he wanted some pony to something like that to him to give him an excuse."

"W-why? You're right, I don't understand."

"My band members were, for some time now, anxious to try and break off. They didn't trust my guidance, and believed that they could do better against the tide of pop music that's been hampering our careers."

"Did… did they blame Vinyl? Do you?"

"No, I don't. I blame," Octavia sighed and laid back on Pinkie's bed. "I don't know who to blame, Pinkamena. I guess it's one of those things that you cannot pick a specific pony to blame."

"Seems kind of unfair."

"That's life. I could blame pop DJs, ponies for not wanting classical, my bandmates for being egotistical and rude, or myself. But I cannot, because really, there is nothing to be gained for blaming others."

Pinkie tried to dry her eyes, staring over at her sister. "Are you… are you going to be okay?"

"I think I will manage, we'll have to see. But there's something I need ask you."

"What's that?"

"Why did you hit him? Was it what he said about Vinyl?"

"It was what he said about both of you! It was," Pinkie tried not to scowl or clench up her hooves, "it was unforgivable!"

"Why? It wasn't true, what he said."

"But that's why it was so wrong!"

"Pinkie, you shouldn't get mad over what ponies say when it's not true."

"But… but if it were true, why would I get mad?"

Octavia opened her mouth, then the confusion sunk in to silence her. Eventually, she just started laughing, her polite, upper-class laughter that still somehow synced with Pinkie giggle-snorting. The two mares were soon laughing, about a subject neither fully understood.

When it died down, Octavia nudged her sister. "Hey now, your party is running downstairs, and I'm sure your friends want to see your smiling face."

Pinkie nodded, and braved going downstairs, wondering what everypony thought of her now. Sure enough, the party was back in motion; though the sisters didn't know, everypony had done this solely to encourage the party pony to come back down and be happy again.

Those closest to Pinkie immediately checked on her to see if she was alright. Though some of them were worried about the fact that Pinkie had decked a pony across the room, others were okay with it; both Rainbow Dash and Applejack admitted they wanted to hit Parish when they heard what he said.

As the party carried on, Twilight broke off from talking to Shining and Cadence. The bookworm approached Pinkie, who was trying on a lampshade.

"Hey, Pinkie?"

"Yeah, Twilight? How's this shade look on me?"

"You know, normally I expect to hear that question from Rarity."

"Silly Twilight! Rarity wouldn't be caught dead wearing a lampshade."

"No, that's not what I… never mind. I just wanted to ask you, what's your sister going to do now that her band split up?"

Pinkie tilted the lampshade up. "Well, I don't know, to be honest. I think she may have to move… I wonder if she'll go back my parents' home. Bellamina's still there, but she likes the rock farm."

"Well, Rarity was telling me everything about the situation," Twilight said, "and I was just thinking. There's that two-pony place available in Ponyville."

"Yeah, but she cannot afford it alone, Twilight. You think I should room with her? The Cakes have told me I'm really helpful with the bakery!"

"That was one thought, but then Rarity told me about Vinyl's predicament, and-"

Twilight never got to finish the sentence, as Pinkie Pie glomped her and snuggled into her, lampshade bouncing happily on her poofy mane. "Oh Twilight! You smart smarty smartest of smart ponies, you! You're a genius! A smart genius!"

"Ow… Pinkie, thank you, but… can you get off?"

"The appreciation hug will not be halted until it is done!"

"Okay, okay, but how long does it last?"

Twilight's dad, Night Light, passed by on his way to get punch for him and his wife. He couldn't help but grin, and say, "You only have to dance with her to stop her from dancing with herself, Pinkie, you don't have to pin her down."


Within a week, Vinyl Scratch and Octavia were moving their belongings in their new place, in Ponyville.

Mayor Mare had been beyond delighted. "Two celebrities here! Oh, the tourism will be so good! And how nice to have more of the Pies here! Pinkie, you make sure to properly show her around our fine town!"

Sea Swirl, one of the town's small-time jobs ponies and a fervent romantic, was immediately asking if Vinyl and Octavia were in a relationship. "If they are, what kind of music do they listen to together?" she had asked Pinkie, matching the party pony's energy with her gusto.

Several of the ponies in Ponyville were there to help. Big Mac and McLargehooves helped move in large furniture, while members of the Apple family helped move in the lighter stuff. Roseluck even helped plant some of the flowers around the building.

Of course, Lyra was thrilled, coming a close second to Pinkie's gusto. She and Bonbon helped with the move-in, and Ms. Heartstrings got the autographs she wanted. Even if the band had broken up, Octavia was her main inspiration.

There were the usual gifts from ponies who were always keen to greet new neighbors. Derpy and her daughters gave a box with her homemade muffins, Carrot Top gave a vegetable basket, Berry a bottle of her favorite wine (unopened, of course, she may have a drinking problem, but she's not thoughtless).

Doctor Whooves showed them around town, giving them a grand tour. Derpy was along side for the walk, and she let them know she'd be their mailmare. As she pointed in the wrong direction of the post office, Vinyl and Octavia were a little concerned about future packages.

The biggest present was from Pinkie, Twilight, and their friends. With donations from Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and a generous portion from Rarity, the six paid for the first month of Vinyl and Octavia's new place.

Octavia was thrilled and thankful for all the generosity and kindness she was being shown by ponies she had only known a week. Her only cause for concern was when Vinyl Scratch had a big stereo brought in their new place.

"You're not going to play that at night, are you?" she asked.

"Aw, no, of course not! But once in a while, I'm gonna have to test the bass on my baby! You haven't felt music until you felt the bass of a big stereo."

Octavia tried to smile, but cringed. "We're gonna need to buy new windows a lot, aren't we?"

"Nope! I have my bass-resistant set of windows, and the Apples are gonna help me install them!"

"Oh dear, we really are going to be an odd couple, aren't we?"

Twilight helped organize the move-in, and even with positioning the large furniture; she had read a book on the art of such positioning, and was putting it to work at its fullest. She kept lifting heavy stuff with her magic, and placing it in certain areas; however, she had to admit, she didn't know which side of the house to put the giant stereo in.

While helping the DJ and cellist move in, Twilight's mind was wandering slightly, thinking about something that had been bothering her. She had been glancing at Pinkie, who was explaining to Cranky what had happened to lead to these new neighbors.

After assisting, Twilight wrote a letter herself, not wishing to have Spike hear her concerns.


Dear Princess Celestia,

I'm happy to say I'm writing this letter with some good news, rather than simply my concerns. You could consider it a friendship report, but I already knew the joys of assisting friends, old and new.
Pinkie Pie's sister, the famous cellist Octavia, and her traveling companion when she left home, the equally well-known DJ Pon-3, a.k.a. Vinyl Scratch, have moved into Ponyville. Every pony, donkey, and zebra is happy to meet the new neighbors, and it truly is heartwarming to see so much joy and kindness.
I am sure the two will get along just fine in Ponyville, even if they come to different areas of life and culture. If my friends here in Ponyville have taught me anything, it's that ponies of all kinds can be friends.
However, there is one thing I want to ask you about that concerns me. About a week ago, Pinkie Pie hit some pony. Many say it was justifiable, as he insulted both Octavia and Vinyl Scratch in an inexcusable manner. But part of me still worries.
Pinkie Pie has never been violent, not even when corrupted by Discord. At the least, I have never seen her like that before until that day. So part of me worries about her, and I would just like to know if I should be.

Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle


Twilight asked Spike to read the letter, and thankfully, he didn't ask any questions. The bookworm was anxious for a response, working herself up inside. Part of her seriously worried that she had worded that letter wrong; she didn't want to insinuate she thought Pinkie was a psychopath deep down.

It actually surprised her when Spike burped up a letter in response a couple hours later. Twilight eagerly read the letter, hoping that she hadn't started something she couldn't take back.


Dear Twilight Sparkle,

It always pleases me to hear about good things like these splendid events. Sometimes, and you really do not know the half of it, you only ever hear about terrible things, bad news, worrying events, and the like. Actually hearing some good news, pleasantries, it is a breath of fresh air.
Addressing your concerns about your friend, I would say, from what I know about Pinkie Pie, I would not worry about her. Everypony loses their temper, though I dare say imagining her hitting some pony, that's rather amazing.
But I am digressing from my main reason for writing this letter. Twilight Sparkle, I would like to invite you and your six friends to the Canterlot Castle. Right now, I am organizing a tour for you seven, and I would very much appreciate it if you all can attend. If not all seven can attend, I could easily reschedule the tour.
If you are curious about the sudden timing of this, let me just say that I not only had it planned for some time, but your letter has merely confirmed that it will be for the best. Do not worry, it is not bad; Pinkie Pie is certainly not in trouble, and neither are any of you.
So please, make sure that you, Pinkie Pie, Spike, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity can come tomorrow. Arrive by noon, if you can. I look forward to seeing you all.

Most sincerely,
Princess Celestia

P.S.: If you have any cupcakes or cake left over from the party, could you bring some? Luna's been a bit down these days, and no pony makes better sweets than Pinkie Pie and the Cakes. Thank you!


Twilight Sparkle read the whole letter three times over, a huge combination of emotions and intrigue swirling around in her.

She rushed around Ponyville to check on the others and see if their schedules allowed a trip tomorrow. Sure enough, everypony was available; Rarity even threw her calendar out the window and exclaimed how nothing would prevent her from visiting Canterlot.

The last she came to was Pinkie Pie, who bounced up and down in excitement. "Canterlot Castle? I've never been to a party there!"

"It's not a party, we are going to be given a tour around the castle."

"That's equally exciting! Are we going to see Princess Celestia's chambers, and her secret collection of royal socks?"

Twilight blinked in confusion, then shook her head. "No no no! See, I took the tour once, when I was a little older than a filly. It's fascinating, you'll all love it!"

"I'm sure we will, Twilight! Thank you so much!"

"For… for what?"

"For everything!"

Pinkie Pie picked her up at the shoulders and spun her around, laughing merrily. The unicorn at first wanted to be put down, but quickly found herself enjoying this moment.

Twilight found herself counting her blessings as she danced around with her friend. She truly was living a blessed life.


The war room of Canterlot Castle was tense, as three of the brightest unicorns, and a pegasus, were studying the map table. A earth pony slave stood next to one of the Grand Mages, watching him observe the map of Equestria.
"I'm not convinced that this is as easy as it looks," Grand Mage Arpeggio said, tapping his chin. "We did take many variables into account, and our invasion on New Ponyville shouldn't be causing so many doubts."
"I think you are over-thinking this," Grand Mage Noble Laureate commented. He used his magic to levitate a pointer, tracing it from Hoofington, around Whitetail Woods, and to New Ponyville. "Simple as that. We have planned this for months. What has your anxiety up?"
"It's never an easy thing to plan a "simple" fight when we are waging war against five enemies."
"One is a cult that would never have the nerve to fight directly, one has been sulking in the forest a great distance from this city, and we have no reason to believe the other houses will be involved."
"No reason with tangible proof, I admit, but I believe we are underestimating our opponents. It has been a fault we all committed, because if we-"
"What are you implying? I don't care for your tone!"
"Now who's reading too much into this, you-"
"Enough!"
The third unicorn slammed her hoof on the edge of the table, and the Grand Mages silenced themselves. That unicorn studied with violet eyes, eyes that seemed to glow with arcane magic. They matched her mane, her coat, and even the clothes she was wearing.
When she used magic to levitate the icons on the table used to represent the troops, she hesitated at the river. Placing the troops back down, she tilted her hat up so she could stare directly across the table.
"Commander Duskwing," Archmagister Twilight Sparkle said, voice stern and strong, "what is your opinion on our troops' chances against House Earthborn in this upcoming battle?"
The two Grand Mages exchanged upset glances, offended a pegasus, even a midnight pegasus, was being asked instead of them. Commander Duskwing had not once stopped studying the map with his yellow eyes, which seemed to narrow in lizard-like fashion when he studied the strongholds of the enemies.
Finally, his bat-like wings spread. "Archmagister, if I may be so bold, I would say we are setting ourselves up for the greatest ambush since our failure at Dragonpoint Outpost."
"How dare you," Noble Laureate snapped, his horn brimming with energy. "You forget your place, you-"
"Enough, Laureate," Twilight Sparkle snapped. "Duskwing, what do you mean?"
"We are at the disadvantage, trying to cross a river when attacking the enemy. I know we planned for the cannons and weapons of House Earthborn, but has it occurred to any of you that we could be flanked from all sides?"
Twilight Sparkle observed the map more. "House Stormwing from the north, House Whitegold from the south, and a possible ambush from the east from any pony."
"But Archmagister," Laureate protested, "no pony is in those woods. And only Redheart's Refuge is to the east; they are a neutral city, a large refuge camp in a way. You don't think they'd try something, do you?"
Twilight rubbed her chin, then glanced at the communication stone she had nearby. Pressing it with her hoof, a magically projected screen appeared above it with a light blue glow radiating the sides. The picture was blank, until the unicorn on the other side answered the communication.
"Yes, Archmagister?" Grand Mage Trixie Lulamoon responded. The conversation was as casual as if both were in the same room, not miles apart. "Trixie is here, on schedule."
"How is everything looking? And do not skimp on details," Twilight ordered.
"We are passing by Redheart's Refuge, on our left. The river is within far seer spell range. The Great and Powerful Trixie's army is ready to attack if you believe us to succeed a night attack.
"We are not fatigued," the Grand Mage was speaking with great confidence, and some of the ponies in the war room wondered if this was because of her ego, or she wanted to sound sanguine in a mission where a Grand Mage, not a Battlemage, was taking control.
Twilight Sparkle raised an eyebrow, her mana-touched skin shimmering with the movement. "Anything wrong, Trixie?"
"No, Trixie is," Trixie stopped talking, then rubbed her white mane underneath her spell caster hat. "Actually, Trixie is loathe to admit it, but she sent a scout party towards Redheart's Refuge an hour ago, to ensure none of the other houses were hiding there.
"They haven't reported back. I made sure…"
"Oh no, she's dropped the third-pony talk," Twilight thought. "She only does that when something's truly wrong."
"They were skilled at long-range Blink," Trixie continued, "and one of my Inquisitors went with them. I'm sorry, Archmagister, I should have asked you for permission first-"
"You are within your right to command Inquisition troops when they are on the battlefield with you, Trixie. But if they went to the neutral city, and didn't return…"
"You think this may be a trap?" Trixie asked, glancing to the side. "Does one of the houses know we are coming? But how? This mission was top secret!"
"It could be," Duskwing spoke, "that they did not plan to intercept a raid from us. Maybe they were planning an attack on some pony else; we accidentally stuck our hoof in the bear trap for another."
Twilight ground her teeth in frustration, which caused the mana touches on her face to shimmer even more. "I am inclined to agree with Duskwing, and with Arpeggio's suspicions. Somehow, the other houses have set up some kind of ambush. We should play this defensively."
"If I may suggest," Arpeggio said, trying hard not to smile at Laureate's shamed face, "maybe we should set up camp across the river, and set up defenses with our troops. Any ambush will run into it and meet certain death."
"I agree, and what's more," Twilight said, grinning at the thought that had crossed her mine, "Trixie, I want you to send a large group of our troops to Redheart's Refuge under the guise of needing medical assistance. Then, we will see what side they are on."
"Excellent, Archmagister," Trixie exclaimed with a sadistic grin on her face. "Trixie will do all of this, no trap will catch us!"
"Wait, Archmagister," Arpeggio said. "Redheart's Refuge is a neutral city. Are we planning a battle there?"
"I did not say that, Grand Mage Arpeggio, but it is something to consider. Trixie," Twilight turned back to the communication stone's screen, "I want a report at sunrise. For Celestia and Luna!"
"For Celestia and Luna, and our Archmagister!" Trixie bowed respectfully, with the flair she was known for. The communication stone's screen vanished as the magic powered down.
Twilight turned back to the three Generals. "We may have to consider something forceful with Redheart's Refuge. We are having enough time trying to get troops across Whitetail Woods, it is strategically in place."
"I don't know if I fully agree," Arpeggio confessed. "Grand Mage Apple Polish is not here, but I think I would speak for her when I say that trying to get involved with neutral cities is not something we should delve in."
"Apple Polish is shamed with a history of earth ponies and pegasi in her family blood line," Laureate snarled. "When we have had to deal with neutral towns and negotiations, it has shown. She is a Grand Mage for her strategy and excellent control of troops and battle machines, not because of her pony opinions.
"And speaking of which, why did you bring a slave here to a war meeting?!"
Arpeggio glanced at the sullen slave at his side, who didn't even glance up. "My apologies to you, Archmagister, but I was called to the meeting so quickly, I hadn't time to finish the business I was attending to. Do not worry, she is under close quarters and watch, she is loyal to me."
Twilight glanced at Duskwing, and the midnight pegasus tilted his head at the slave pony. She nodded, and he obeyed. One moment he was standing still, the next he was on the other side of the map table, a wing blade penetrating the slave's head. The slave's eyes rolled up into her head, and she collapsed to the floor, blood oozing from the fatal strike.
"You should know better than to bring a slave to a war meeting," Twilight chided Arpeggio. "My apologies if this makes your duties a little harder to follow, but you truly should know by now."
"My apologies again," he humbly stated, trying to ignore Laureate's haughty, triumphant grin. Instead, he observed his dead slave, blood pooling around her head. "I shall get some pony to clean this up right away, then return to my duties."
"Thank you. Stay vigilant, as I may need you again soon, if this battle turns out to be more difficult than we anticipated."
He turned to leave, when she called out to him. "And by the way, Arpeggio, I hear your wife is expecting."
"Yes, Archmagister, that is true."
"You have my congratulations. I am sure he or she will be a wonderful unicorn, maybe join your first daughter in our research labs. Or maybe she will become a Grand Mage like her father."
"That would truly be wonderful, though I would like to win this war before she becomes old enough to serve at that level."
"Well said. She will grow up in a new, better world then. For Celestia and Luna, Grand Mage Arpeggio."
"For Celestia and Luna!"
After Twilight Sparkle excused herself from the war room, she entered her own private study. She started to flip through the book she had been studying before she and the Grand Mages had gathered in the war room.
"Thine actions were not necessary."
Twilight rolled her eyes and glanced to her left at the speaker. The ghost, cuffed with golden, ethereal bands around his hooves, was frowning at her. He, almost nonchalantly despite the mood, stroked his beard; she knew it was his thinking habit by now.
"Killing that slave wasn't for any reason but to be cruel," Starswirl the Bearded commented. "Thou art a leader and a unicorn, not a cold-blooded killer."
"It was a slave, an earth pony, barely at the level of being called a tool," Twilight muttered. "Too many of them out there already, what's one less?"
"Every being serves a purpose. Simply destroying them because they are alow thee does not serve aught, except asserting power that thou already have."
The Archmagister groaned in frustration, and spat, "Fine, I just ordered it because I'm getting sick to death of things not going as planned. You should know by now that nothing aggravates me more than that."
"Smart ponies doth not blame the tools, Twilight Sparkle. That was something Celestia taught me whenas I drew breath."
Mentioning the princess's name helped subside some of Twilight's frustration. She sighed, then walked over to the ghost of Starswirl. "I want to show you something, Starswirl."
She channeled her magic to teleport herself and the ghost, using the shackles on his ghostly legs as a means of targeting the spell, up to the highest tower of the Canterlot Castle. There, the two could see not only the entire city, but a great deal of Equestria that stretched as far as their eyes could see. The magic shield around Canterlot was, fortunately, transparent enough not to hamper such a glorious view.
"Celestia and Luna kept this world in an amazing state long after you passed away," she said to Starswirl. "Unicorns have always believed in the Sisters. We work to expand the magic of this world, research cures and medicine, study history, and much, much more.
"Out there, pegasi pollute the skies with their presence, believing they are better because they can work clouds. Out there, earth ponies trample everything they can because they think they own the earth.
"Our opponents for a better future are as follows: a sadistic, insane cult led by some earth pony who poses as some pony I knew; a pegasus who wants us all to lie in the dirt like beasts; an earth pony who lives in hypocrisy and lies leading earth ponies too stupid to know anything except how to pound things…
"A gullible yet still treacherous pegasus who thinks herself a great warrior; and a unicorn who is so enveloped in her greed and profiteering, that it blinds to actually fight for what she believes in.
"That's what is out there on Celestia's land. Under the Sun and Moon that they worked so hard to provide for all these ungrateful ponies. So forgive if I do not care about one damn slave who was so thick, she didn't even bother to look up when we spoke about her possible execution."
Starswirl didn't respond to this, he continued to stare out at the city and land in front of him. Before Twilight could demand a response, he said, "When House Moon and Star controls Equestria, thou may find it too spacious for thee to maintain a unicorn superior culture yonside all corners."
"Celestia and Luna could spread the sun and moon all over their domain. It will take time, no denying that, but once we wipe out the traitors," she growled and clenched her fist, magic radiating from her hoof, "I will see to it myself. For their glory, for a better future, one without drooling earth ponies and pompous pegasi who do nothing."
"Thou wilt claim domain over yon earth and sky, Archmagister Twilight?"
"It is my destiny to. Celestia chose me all those years ago, this is what she would want. This is what Luna would want, Starswirl. This is what my parents would want.
"This future I have in mind, it is our future. Don't tell me you didn't imagine a world based on progress, on magic, under their name."
"Twas a meet future I had imagined several times ere, verily."
"And soon, I will make it a reality. All I need is a little more time, a little more success, maybe a push or two in directions that I will have to regret later, and then, Equestria will be… perfect."
"Forsooth, Archmagister Twilight Sparkle."


"Pinkie, we are going on a tour of the Canterlot Castle!" Twilight insisted. "You don't need to pack anything!"

"But what if I run into a situation where I desperately need a juicer? There I'll be, no juicer, and I'll have to shout, 'Oh heavens above, there be no juicer here for juicing!' You have to plan these things, Twilight!"

Twilight had followed Pinkie to Sugarcube Corner, when the party pony had dashed off to prepare for the trip tomorrow. Despite the insistence beforehoof, Twilight hadn't been able to convince Pinkie of packing light or not at all. Here she was, still trying to plead the case.

"Pinkie Pie, trust me when I say that you won't need a juicer for a tour of Canterlot Castle. And wait a second, isn't that my juicer?"

"I borrowed it in case I have a juicing emergency at home. Spike said it was okay."

Pinkie proceeded to juggle the juicer, as well as several items from her pack, as if trying to showcase her point to Twilight. Her unicorn friend stared blankly, then sighed.

"Look, just trust me, Pinkie. I assure you, you don't need any of those things, even your party cannon."

"But I-"

"Yes, yes I know." Twilight rubbed her temple as she tried to think of how to handle this. "Okay, compromise time: you can bring the party cannon, as well as a few other things, as long as you come as normally as possible."

"That sounds reasonable. I need to bring my towel though, one should never forget their towel when traveling."

"Now don't embarrass me on this trip, Pinkie, please? I know a lot of ponies in Canterlot, and I think I've earned good behavior from you after I've been good at your parties and your sister's concert."

"Deal!"

Pinkie Pie even Pinkie Promised her. The two then shared a laugh, as they talked about what they would do when they reached Canterlot. It was going to be a big day tomorrow, and neither could wait.

"But when we get back, you have to help me with the welcoming party for Octavia and Vinyl!" Pinkie insisted along their walk. "I haven't done that yet, and they deserve it!"

"Of course, Pinkie, of course."


AT LAST.

THIS IS THE ONE I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR.

SHE FITS THE REQUIREMENTS I NEED, THAT THE WORLD NEEDS.

NOT TOO INNOCENT, AND YET NOT TOO MUCH AGGRESSION IN HER SOUL.

I NEED HER, THE WORLD NEEDS HER.

I ONLY HOPE SHE WILL FORGIVE ME FOR THIS…

I DOUBT SHE, OR ANY PONY FOR THAT MATTER, WILL FORGIVE ME.

BUT MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, SHE WILL UNDERSTAND.

SHE IS THE PERFECT CHOICE IN THE MILLIONS OF PLACES I HAVE LOOKED, AFTER ALL.

AGAINST THE JESTER, THE DRAGOON, THE GEM…

AGAINST THE STAR, THE THUNDER, AND THE FOREST…

THE SAMURAI WILL PREVAIL.


Pinkie Pie's ears twirled out of sync, her haired turned spiny for a few seconds, and her head bowed as she let out an exclamation. After that passed, she frowned in concern.

"Okay, that's new," she muttered. "I am so taking my towel with me. And my party cannon. And maybe the juicer too; I don't want to be caught off-guard if someone attacks with fresh fruit.

"And my anti-pointed stick device, just in case. I hope Twilight's okay with that; I still need to try it out."

Prologue Part 2 - The Drafting of the Samurai

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Canterlot appealed to most of Twilight's ensemble.

She of course loved it, it was home, it was where she grew up, and it was the capital of Equestria. It had the grandest libraries, the best museums, and was a focal point in learning, culture, and progress.

Rarity loved it because it was where the upper class lived. The most glamorous dresses and fashions were made and worn there. Every pony was cultured, civil, and living the kind of life she always dreamed of. She sometimes wished she could move there, maybe one day she would.

Rainbow Dash liked it too, because it was so spacious and airy. Pegasi of the metropolis flew from place to place, daily commutes as fun as free-style flying. She could also get used to the food they served.

Spike was born in Canterlot. He grew up there, he knew ponies there that had known Twilight Sparkle. Of course he would love any excuse to come back and see it.

Fluttershy enjoyed seeing the animals that lived in Canterlot, as amazing and plentiful as Ponyville, though different in special ways. One would think a posh, upper-class city like Canterlot wouldn't have many animals, but if you knew history of Equestria and Canterlot (and you don't, we know you didn't study), you would know how much animals and ponies truly live in harmony.

Pinkie Pie could party anywhere. She could make friends with anypony. She loved visiting new places. Canterlot was pure fun for her.

Applejack was the exception.

The farm pony felt the giant city was suffocating, the enormous amount of ponies and buildings made her feel like she was boxed in. The fancy, posh attitude that seemed to be literally built into the cities. Applejack could practically feel the "what the hay is she wearing?" stares she received from ponies who reacted to her buckaroo hat. It was like she was wearing a lampshade in public.

Though her apprehension to being in the posh metropolis was not noticed, as Twilight Sparkle was more than a little distracted by Pinkie Pie.

"I thought you and I agreed," Twilight hissed as she stared down Pinkie Pie, "that you wouldn't do anything embarrass me at Canterlot Castle!"

"I'm not, Twili."

"Then why are you wearing that?"

Pinkie tried to glance at what she was wearing on her head, but that proved to be difficult; it is, after all, hard to see what is placed on your head and over your ears. Thus, Pinkie couldn't look at the white headphones she was wearing.

She could, however, look at the small magical device that the headphones were plugged into. "If you're worried about my gicPod, I'm not listening to any music right now."

Twilight frowned at her, then glared at the musical/magical device. The two of them stepped out into the street, leaving the hotel that had been set up for their group when they arrived in Canterlot. A carriage was to arrive and pick them up soon, but Twilight wasn't sure now if she wanted to go to the castle when her friend was like this.

"We have been asked to go on a tour of Canterlot Castle, the most important place in all of Equestria," Twilight continued, "and you're going to wear headphones?!"

"Like I said, silly, my gicPod isn't playing music, so I am wearing one for the tour effect that is only proper for tours."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Vinyl told me all about it. You see, pretty much every entourage at Canterlot has a member wearing headphones and drinking something when on tour."

As if to further demonstrate her point, she pulled a tall cup with a straw from her mane. She sucked on the straw, though it was obvious no liquid was in the cup. "And thus, I am helping you by making our group seem normal!"

Twilight face-hoofed. She really, really did not want to embarrassed at Canterlot. She knew ponies here, Celestia was here! Though she loved Pinkie, and could stand her antics, she didn't think many of the higher minds of Canterlot would appreciate it.

Twilight continued to argue with Pinkie about wearing headphones and pretending to drink as their other friends came out of the hotel. The debate was stopped as Rarity stepped forward, and Twilight's violet eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.

"Darling," Rarity said, waving a hoof at Twilight, "I think you're being too hard on Pinkie. You see, it is the craze going around nowadays to be casual, aloof, to act like a pony who is not part of an establishment."

"What… why… how," Twilight stammered.

"Well, I studied like Pinkie did, especially since her darling sister told me all about this craze," Rarity said, batting her eyes. "Chancellor Puddinghead unofficially declared this week to be Thinking Outside the Chimney Week, also known as To Chweek. Thus, you wear things to express your individualism."

"Doesn't explain what you're wearing," Rainbow Dash said to her.

Rarity bat her eyes again, and adjusted the maroon beret that rested on a tilt on her head. Her black sweater almost had a luster to it, with how sleek the fabric was. Rarity had even combed her hair so that it wasn't as curly, and thus looked slightly like Twilight's style.

In fact, that's why the bookworm was almost freaking out. Rarity was dressed like a hipster, wearing her hair like Twilight's. And she was going to be seen with Twilight, at Canterlot Castle.

"Ah gotta say, Rare," Applejack spoke up, "I rather like this look on you."

"Aw, thank you, dearie!"

Rarity fluttered her eyes at the farm pony, who simply chuckled and glanced away. The fashionista glanced over at Twilight, who was still staring incredulously. "Now now, Twilight, don't be like that. Pinkie and I dressed like this so that we would look up to standards at Canterlot."

"Nopony dresses like this in Canterlot," Twilight shouted, trying and failing to contain herself.

"Um," Fluttershy's timid voice somehow drifted into the conversation, "Twilight? Over there?"

Fluttershy was pointing at a collection of ponies who were walking down the road, bags of purchased products around their sides. Almost all of them were wearing clothing that wasn't the norm, especially for Canterlot. One even had the same beret as Rarity, and was wearing glasses that Twilight knew couldn't be prescription.

Twilight watched them pass by, the last one bobbing his head to the music coming from his headphones, sipping a drink. The lavender unicorn sighed in defeat, then glanced at Pinkie.

"Just please promise me you won't play music on that thing," she requested, pointing at Pinkie's gicPod. "I didn't even know you owned one."

"I've never really to use it until now, mostly because when I want music to be heard, I sing!" Pinkie Pie proudly pronounced with perfect pitch the particular punctuation. "But for trips and such, I like to have some music in case of emergency. These magical music players are so fun!"

"Personally, Ah think they're kind of silly," Applejack admitted. "Ah mean, Ah know it's a great leap in technology, to be able to control magic inside a small box like that, and have it play music, but really? You kind of look antisocial wearing headphones in public, Pinkie."

Their carriage arrived, pulled by four royal stallions who let out such proud nickers, Rarity swooned a little. One of them complimented her hat, and she was all gushy with him as they rode to the castle. In the meantime, Pinkie was trying to force Applejack to listen to a song she thought might appeal to the country pony.

"Of course, I prefer my collection of Octavia's music," Pinkie listed, "and "Weird Corral" Flankovic, and this awesome collection of beats that Vinyl gave me before we left this morning. But sometimes, mood strikes you, ya know?"

Applejack blinked in astonishment as the music poured from the headphones and flooded her ears. "When in the hay would the mood strike you fer this song?"

"Try not to swear at the castle," Twilight cautioned her friend. "It's really not proper, and-"

"Ya, Ah know about yer fancy traditions!" Applejack waved a hoof. "Ah'll be as good behaved as a dog who knows she's about ta git a treat!"

"And that treat would be?" Rainbow teased her, glancing between the two.

When they arrived at the castle, Shining Armor's replacement for Captain of the Guard, Rallying Cry, was there to greet them. The black-coated, light blue-maned stallion was a little intimidating to see, especially since he was wearing his armor; it made the girls a little afraid that something bad was happening.

But as it turned out, it was purely for show as he had taken Princess Celestia's request that the Ponyville visitors be treated with the utmost respect. "I normally wear this for ceremonies and such," he explained, the slightest look of sheepishness in his strong face. "It's not really for battle; besides, that stuff still stinks of changeling blood months after the incident."

Rallying Cry, better known by other ponies now as Captain Rally, kissed Twilight and Rarity's hooves in greeting. "It is common tradition," he said to the blushing mares, "to greet important guests like this. I hope I am not embarrassing you?"

"We're fine," Rarity assured her with a purr in her voice. "But be careful, Twilight's brother is the stallion who used to have your job."

Captain Rally snickered. "I trained Shining Armor, if you believe that. He surpassed me, couldn't be prouder."

He made his way to say hello to the others of the group, but most of them were fine with him not kissing their hoof. Spike earned a small salute.

The captain then led them into the castle, the grand main hall still a sweeping, amazing sight to them all, despite having seen it many times. Twilight glanced all around, admiring small changes she could recognize, then was distracted by Pinkie slurping her empty cup.

"Groovy," the party pony said with a giggle. "I love visiting the castle! And being escorted by the captain of the guard! I feel like a soldier, or something important like that!"

"While I dare say you wouldn't fit in the Canterlot military," Captain Rally said, smirking at her, "your achievements that the princess talks about are very impressive and we wouldn't mind."

"What would I fight?" Pinkie asked, her excited voice carrying throughout the main hall. "Monsters? Ghosts? Changelings? Changeling ghosts riding monsters?"

"Canterlot, and rather all of Equestria, has not had a true enemy for many years."

Captain Rally escorted them down a hallway that Twilight Sparkle had seen a few times. It was a glass-display documentary, telling stories with stained glass windows and magical displays. It wasn't her favorite historic hallway, however.

"Throughout the history of Equestria, ponies have waged war against several types of monsters and creatures," Captain Rally explained. His hoof falls, made stronger by his boots, echoed throughout the hallway, reminding the girls of a marching army. "The very first enemy we fought was, actually, something we do not entirely remember."

He gestured with a hoof towards the stain glass window the depicted a faceless, shapeless entity reached with clawed hands at a couple of frightened ponies. An earth pony was standing between them and the monster, rearing up on its hind legs, holding a rather long knife in his hooves.

"We do not know much, as most records did not survive the test of time," Captain Rally explained. "What we do know is that an evil race wished to enslave many of the creatures of Equestria, including us ponies. They were unspeakably evil, and thus ponies fought against them with equal aggression."

"What's that neat thing the earth pony is holding?" Pinkie Pie asked. "I could use that to cut three cakes at once!"

"Back then, when ponies had to be more brutal, they crafted weapons that were not like normal weapons today. That is a particularly deadly sword, curved, tempered to withstand slashing through any creature, be they flesh, rock, wood, or scale."

Fluttershy swallowed nervously. "Oh my, that sounds horrible! How could any pony think to hurt a living thing?"

Captain Rally glanced at the timid pegasus, and though he had the fierce eyes of a warrior, he still was a gentlecolt. "A pony must do what he or she must to protect the ones they love, Fluttershy. Times were different back then, and thus, they had to resort to violence to survive."

"Sounds wicked," Rainbow Dash said. "Even if they look like they're trying to cut up a ghost."

"The weapons of ancient ponies were said to be enchanted, to help them fight against unnatural powers." Captain Rally pat the scabbard at his side. "Nowadays, since we have no call for great weapons, our blades and bludgeons are simplistic but still made well.

"Still, it is a pity that so few of the enchanted blades of olden times have never been found. It is said that those blades, especially the kind depicted here, have a thousand stories of justice and bravery to tell."

"And death," Fluttershy muttered sadly.

"Darling, don't be too upset," Rarity said, patting her friend in comfort. "Those days are long, long gone. We live in much better times."

"Think of it this way, Flutters," Pinkie said as she again sipped her empty cup. "The ponies died way back when so you could live how you do now. Remember them for that."

"I guess," Fluttershy said.

"What were those fancy blades called, anyway?" Applejack asked. "Ah'm a mite curious."

"They were anything but fancy, my dear," Captain Rally said with a laugh. "They were known as 'katanas,' and only ponies with the strength, creativity, and training could hope to fight using them. It's not easy for ponies to fight on their hind legs, or use weapons with their hooves. Again, a reason we all wish we knew more."

"I love studying the unknown," Twilight said, smiling gleefully. "It's like you can almost make up your own lore to figure out the truth behind what you do know!"

Rainbow Dash wandered off from the group, studying the depictions of battle in the stain glass windows. Statutes of ponies posed in battle armor and wielding weapons added to the atmosphere. It all almost distracted her from noticing a rather special window.

"Hey everypony," she declared, pointing at the window. "It's us!"

"What?" Twilight said, heading over with the others. "That doesn't make sense, the windows depicting us are not in this hallway…"

Her confusion was cleared up when she saw who exactly was in the window of history. Princess Platinum, horn glowing with magic, was glaring down Commander Stormwing, who was glaring right back at her, with Chancellor Puddinghead mocking them from the lower part of the window.

"I know you all are familiar with our country's founders," Captain Rally said. "I saw your performances; however, I don't remember Chancellor Puddinghead being quite so silly."

Pinkie Pie innocently whistled, while at the same time pretending to listen to her headphones. Twilight Sparkle glanced at the three leaders of the racial houses back then.

"So we went from fighting a dominating enemy," Applejack said, "to fighting each other? What the hay happened?"

"Hey now," Twilight cautioned her, but Captain Rally merely chuckled.

"Odd, isn't it? We fight together, only to fight each other. As some of you may know," he said, nodding to Twilight, "history is a little darker than we'd all care to remember. The pegasi, unicorns, and earth ponies were so desperate for a place to call their own, they ended up fighting each other.

"And not as gently as you might want to believe. While war and grand-scale death did not happen, riots and fights among the three pony kinds did break out. A lot of ponies, hungry and needing, would kill each other for any land that wasn't being dominated by snow."

"And to think," Rarity said with a sad shake of her head, "it all happened because they were fighting."

"Commander Stormwing was chosen by her people because they truly wanted a warrior to lead them to victory," Captain Rally explained. He pointed to Stormwing, who was not rainbow-maned and light blue like Rainbow Dash, but a dark yellow mane and shadowy gray coat.

"So I played as a warrior?" Rainbow asked. "Neat!"

"Oh, I don't like it," Fluttershy whimpered. "I felt so privileged to be Private Pansy in the play, I hate to think she… she… killed somepony!"

"As far as the records say, she never did," Captain Rally assured her. "Though Commander Stormwing was a fierce and stubborn pegasus, and definitely fought many opponents in combat personally. The other two? Not so much.

"Princess Platinum inherited her position, as you may have guessed. Chancellor Puddinghead was elected, mostly because she was the only one who was brave enough to face a princess and a commander in political debates."

"Puddinghead was brave?" Applejack asked with a scoff.

"You shouldn't mistake her zany attitude for not being a brave pony. She had to be strong to not let others push earth ponies around, and thus became a little too focused in pushing back to listen to Smart Cookie until after the alliance."

"I prefer to think of those times," Pinkie admitted. "The six of them becoming the true allies against real evil, and realizing we are all ponies deep down."

"Indeed, after the snow started to melt away in Equestria, or Place Ponies Play Perfectly as Puddinghead called in her journals," Captain Rally explained. "She always did like alliteration. Equestria truly began to grow then, and eventually, our princesses grew to the leaders we know today."

"You sure know about history," Twilight commented, "for a member of the army. Err, I mean," she nervously stammered when he cast her a confused glance, "I'm not implying you're dumb or anypony in the military is dumb! My brother is in the military! It's just…"

"Yes, I am well aware Shining Armor doesn't have the best grasp of history. I am a bit of a history buff, it was what I studied when I was in school. So I rather like to lead these escorts for ponies and beings of high authority when I can, gives me a chance to show off."

Captain Rally escorted them to another window, this one sadly recognizable in its issues. Nightmare Moon, in full defiance, was rearing to attack Celestia. Beneath them in the window, ponies were attacking each other, but some were not normal.

"When Princess Luna tragically fell to corruption and jealousy," Rallying Cry said, "she had tried to force ponies to accept her nights. Thus, nocturnal ponies were created, including midnight pegasi, who serve our princesses to this day."

"Why did they fight?" Fluttershy whimpered. "Aren't we better a thousand years ago?"

"The ponies that were changed by Nightmare Moon were treated as outcasts, before and after the princess was banished to the moon. Thus, they aggressively fought back to avoid being destroyed as traitors to the throne. Princess Celestia spared them, and thus we still have some around today, including the Captain of the Night Guard, Duskwing."

Twilight Sparkle nodded. She had met Duskwing once, during her brother's promotion to Captain of the Day Guard. The midnight pegasus had been more than a little intimidating to see in pony, and Twilight had wondered why he was called the Night Guard, while most ponies referred to her brother simply as Captain of the Guard.

"Is there still some lingering prejudices?" she asked.

"I would hope not, but mostly the nocturnal ponies have reverted back to normal sleeping patterns, except midnight pegasi. Commander Duskwing and the others prefer the night, and thus don't mind being a little isolated."

"They need a night party," Pinkie suggested. "Can I host a night party here?"

"I don't think they'd come."

"Then I'll make them come!"

She laughed aggressively, rubbing her hooves together. As Applejack prevented her from putting on a devious mustache, Captain Rally chuckled. "I'd love to see you try."

"This is all so depressing," Fluttershy said, glancing sadly at the captain. "Could we please see something more interesting? Something nicer?"

"This is history," Twilight protested.

"Plus, it's combat and achieving awesomeness," Rainbow Dash exclaimed. "What's more awesome than that, Fluttershy?"

Captain Rally rubbed his chin. "Well, there's always the history of sex."

Almost everypony and dragon had wide eyes at this. Only Pinkie looked slightly less interested, not embarrassed for being interested, as she casually sipped her empty cup. "Well duh," she boldly stated. "We all know how it works!"

"Spike not know," Rarity hissed, rushing over to cover Spike's ears with her ears. "Shush! He doesn't have to know about the birds and bees now!"

"Um, but he already knows my pet birds and bees," Fluttershy admitted.

Rallying Cry, using his rather powerful voice, called for assistance. Two servant ponies arrived, and gleefully escorted Spike to the cafeteria for some gemstone snacks. The dragon for once didn't look so thrilled for his favorite food, he wanted to hear more about reproduction.

After convincing Fluttershy that this was truly about education, the ponies headed off to another historical wing, dedicated to love and fertility of their kind. Most of it was love stories, discovering how ponies of different races could not only have babies together, but why the results could sometimes be rather unpredictable.

Also there was the rather puzzling explanation to why pegasi and unicorns didn't make alicorn babies. Alicorn origins were so far back, no pony truly knew about them. The princesses didn't discuss the issue much, and thus historians just had to work around their leaders' stubbornness on the issue.

The best part was when Captain Rally, the only male pony of the group, had to discuss love children of two mares. "It was actually a long time ago that such a miracle could happen," he said. He managed to still sound tough and formal, despite talking about a subject that had Fluttershy hiding her now red face.

"I thought fertility potions had only been around for a few decades?" Rainbow asked.

"There have been several ways two mares repopulate, and they vary so much, it's hard to differentiate the lovely myths from the truth."

"Oh my," Rarity said with a giggle. "It's so funny, to think about it in serious ways!"

"Truthfully, it has always been a problem for our kind to reproduce," Twilight Sparkle said, adapting her scholar voice for this. "Ponies have biological complexities that cause us to have a one-in-seven chance to give birth to a male. Thus, the need for finding a way to impregnate a female as a female was a study long since-"

"Quit saying impregnate," Pinkie Pie whispered to her, "Fluttershy's blushing enough as it is."

Captain Rally cleared his throat. "Well, I think you all know enough about this, or," he glanced at Fluttershy, "as much as you care to. Maybe another time?"

"Oh, but the whole point of this trip," said a familiar voice behind them, "is to educate them all about Equestria."

Princess Celestia approached them, smiling at her subjects. They all bowed respectively, though Pinkie accidentally knocked off her headphones, scrambled to get them back on, tangled the wires up with her drink and crashed on her face. The princess held back a small laugh to desist embarrassing the party pony.

"I think it is time, however," she spoke as they all rose, "that I show you the reason I brought you all here. It is a very sacred room, and with something that may worry you to learn about, but I know you all.

"And I believe you are ready to understand more about the world, or more so about the universe. Spike may be too young, and I see you sent him off for a snack before learning about mares reproducing. Though please tell me…"

The princess's smile became rather mirthful, and she asked, "Was this because one or more of you are interested in this subject?"

Most of the mares there blushed, and denied the idea. Only Pinkie Pie, finally untangling herself, didn't quickly dismiss the idea, but that was solely because she wasn't interested.

Truthfully, she was interested, despite part of her not liking it, about the war hallway and the idea of fighting evil. Pinkie still was troubled about what happened a week ago, with Octavia's former bandmate. Part of her wondered if there was still that fighting side in her still.

She had managed to push it away for now, as she was overjoyed to have Octavia and Vinyl Scratch in Ponyville. Pinkie had many plans for what their welcoming party would be, and wondered how all of her friends would be at the party.

Cloud Kicker would probably hit on both, she was such a flirty pegasus. Sea Swirl, who had already asked about their relationship numerous times in hoping it was romantic, would probably abandon asking and try to pair them together.

Doctor Whooves would obviously make sure everything in their new home was in order, he was very obliging like that. He'd probably even offer a free check-up, he had a tendency to ensure perfect health in new arrivals in Ponyville.

Maybe even Cranky would take a shine to them, Octavia more so. Pinkie knew he and Matilda loved classical music, so the donkeys could be good friends with her sister. Vinyl would be a little more tricky, as her DJ buddy loved things loud, the opposite of what Cranky liked.

Speaking of likes, Pinkie wondered how Octavia and Vinyl felt about babies. Pound and Pumpkin were still so young, so adorable, how could anypony not like them? Still, babysitting wasn't for everypony, as she had learned, so she wondered if they'd enjoy watching over the twins? Who could love those two mischievous babies?

You may be wondering why this digression of narration has happened rather abruptly. It is because after that last thought, Pinkie, much like the readers, found themselves in a large, circular room. Her train of thought had been so distracting, she hadn't noticed Princess Celestia teleport them all to this room.

Pinkie was glancing around the room in curiosity. The ceiling and upper walls were artfully painted, depicting ponies of all kinds, colors, and age participating in many activities. And though she knew she really should be listening to the princess, Pinkie was lost in the artwork, especially when she noticed something peculiar.

"The ponies you see on the ceiling and wall artwork," Celestia was saying, "are all ponies I have monitored in this room."

Rainbow was the first to point out the obvious. "But your Highness, there aren't any windows in here!"

Princess Celestia nodded at this, then approached the only furniture in the room: a throne decorated with some rather stunning gems and precious metals. She used her golden magic to reveal a button in one of the armrests, and clicked it.

The floor in the middle of the room parted, and a glowing orb hovered up into sight. The amount of magic radiating from it was staggering, even to the non-unicorns and alicorns in the room.

Captain Rally bowed his head. "I'm honored that the princess is allowing me to see this again."

Twilight Sparkle blinked in surprise. "Princess, what is this?"

Walking next to the orb as the floor closed up underneath it, Princess Celestia gestured with her wing. "This is my key to seeing other universes. It is a window to see how all of us would fare differently…

"… and who we are in different worlds."

The six mares stared in disbelief, and then Twilight gasped loudly. "You mean… alternate realities? They are real? Really real? For real reals?"

"Of course, Twilight," Celestia said. "I wouldn't have introduced you to the idea if it was fiction."

"Okay, I am totally, and utterly, lost," Rainbow Dash muttered. "Twilight, can you translate?"

"Alternate realities are other realities out there," Twilight explained, that knowledgeable, adorkable tone in her voice that could be so charming. "Basically, what you have is another world where you exist, but you are technically not you."

"Still lost, sugarcube," Applejack said. "Come on, you know not all us ponies can follow these complex things like can so well."

Twilight sighed, then rubbed her head to think of an easy explanation. "Okay, um… think of it like a story character. Daring Do, if you would."

As the other ponies nodded, Celestia distanced herself slightly by going to sit in the chair. Her horn lit up with magic as Twilight spoke, and the orb expanded itself into a flat rectangle stretching several meters.

"Think of if one author writes a story about Daring Do, and then another author does her own ideas with Daring. But they are not the same storyline, they are two different stories and two different pathways."

"Oh I see," Rarity said. "Like in a romantic love triangle, if the mare choses the second stallion instead of the first!"

"Um, yes, kind of."

"Such worlds exist?" Fluttershy said. "You mean… there are more of us out there? More of me and all of you?"

The glowing rectangle flashed with Celestia's magic, making it transparent enough for the ponies to see her on the other side. "Indeed, my little ponies. This is the Astral Screen, one of the most powerful magical items in the world. It allows a pony who has taken much, much time and effort to master the incredibly complex ley lines to see other worlds.

"I know this is a hard concept to grasp, so take comfort in the same way I did: though there are many, many versions of you out there, you are unique, and stand out among the many as that specific one."

"Kind of like life itself," Applejack said with a laugh. "Millions of ponies out there, yet you're one in the millions."

"Exactly, Applejack," the princess said with a grateful smile. "I wanted to show you some of these worlds, because I know that some of you have been worrying if you aren't special or brave or strong enough. I just wanted to show you that out there, you make a difference no matter how your life varies.

"Though I must warn you," her voice darkened, making all of the mares, and even Captain Rally, shiver a little. "In some universes, you are not… good ponies."

"I'm… I'm a bad pony somewhere else?" Fluttershy asked, looking panicked already.

"You aren't a bad pony here, Flutters," Pinkie assured her. "What Fluttershy does in some other world doesn't change who you are."

"Thank you, Pinkie Pie," Princess Celestia said. "You seem rather relaxed about all this."

"When you've had about a hundred versions of you bouncing around, you can grasp the concept of individuality."

Celestia blinked in confusion at this, and decided to let it go. She may be a being of incredible power, and millennia of experience and knowledge, but even she could get a little perplexed at Pinkie. She powered up magic in her horn, and focused on the rectangle of power.

The magical screen lit up completely now, and soon it was flashing images of ponies. The glimpses were too fast for anypony to make out at first, but then they became more steady.

An image of Rainbow Dash, turning prismatic all over like if her entire body had been dyed metallic rainbow, shooting through the sky and right into a gray pegasus. She then proceeded, to many of those viewing's surprise, pummel the living hay out of her apparent opponent.

"Neat," Dash exclaimed, while Fluttershy hid behind Applejack.

The screen flashed again, and they saw Twilight Sparkle, only she wasn't… she. The six mares all gasped, especially the bookworm, because they couldn't believe what they were seeing.

"Twilight's a boy," Rainbow exclaimed, bursting with laughter. "Twilight's a dude, a stallion! That's hilarious!"

"My my," Rarity said, grinning at a red-faced Twilight, "you don't look half-bad as a stallion, dear."

"Oh my," Fluttershy stated. "Um… why is male Twilight with me?"

"Ah think what's more important to ask is how," Applejack commented, "you two are sitting around, at a picnic together, and y'all aren't saying nuttin! Are y'all on a date or something?"

Now Fluttershy was blushing rather fiercely, and hid behind Rarity more. Celestia decided to stop embarrassing her favorite student with this alternate reality, and changed the picture.


SHE IS USING THE ASTRAL SCREEN!

I WILL NEVER GET ANOTHER SHOT AT THIS.

PLEASE, PINKIE, AND PINKIE'S FRIENDS, FORGIVE ME FOR THIS.

THE TIMING MUST BE PERFECT. PLEASE, CELESTIA, KEEP THE POSSIBLE DOOR OPEN FOR ME...


Princess Celestia rather enjoyed showing her subjects these alternate realities. At first, she had been worried they'd react badly to the idea there were many versions of them out there, but as the reality had rested in them all, they seemed rather keen learn more about the universes out there.

As long as it wasn't too embarrassing for themselves. Applejack and Twilight Sparkle were completely unable to look at each other when they had seen the alternate universe where the two had somehow become married after a night of drinking; Rainbow Dash was still rolling on the ground laughing at this.

After showing them many other realities, some of them involving romantic relationships between each other (Celestia even showed one where Twilight was dating Luna, even though she knew her sister might kill her for revealing that), the princess decided to go forth with the harsher, more important reason for this.

"I know you all have been worried that you could be bad ponies, but I want to tell you that you aren't," she said. "Trust me when I say that I know bad ponies, and they exist out there. They are guiltless and cruel, and despite the things you all have done, you have all felt guilt, shame, and remorse at your actions.

"This is something that many ponies lack, tragically. Why ponies hurt each other so much, I will never know; I am rather glad how our universe turned out, as we are a kingdom that runs on love, trust, and friendship."

Fluttershy swallowed hard and raised a hoof timidly. "P-princess? I… I don't want to see bad me."

"I will spare you, and all of you if you prefer," their princess offered.

Twilight Sparkle shook her head. "I'm sorry, I want to see at least once what I am like… when worse. I just want a basis… because sometimes I feel like a bad pony."

As her friends all assured her she most certainly was not, Princess Celestia used her magic to channel a reality she knew all too well. Twilight Sparkle was the first to gasp in terror, as she saw herself in this world.

The Twilight of this universe had an evil, red glow in the dark part of her eyes. And she was violently striking Apple Bloom with magic.

"No! Mah little sister," Applejack screamed in horror.

The image was gone in a heartbeat, transparent with Celestia staring at them from the other side. "In that world, Twilight was part of an ancient prophecy of evil rising from a long time ago. I had failed to properly warn her, her friends tried but failed as well to quell the evil, and thus it overtook her."

"No," Twilight whimpered. "No, I was…"

"It is okay though," Celestia said. "Apple Bloom survives the encounter, and, in fact, plays a major role in restoring you, Twilight."

"Thank goodness," Pinkie Pie commented, slurping on her non-existent drink. "That red part of her eyes was most unnerving… only Dashie makes red eyes look good."

Twilight was still recovering from such a horrible vision. Applejack nuzzled her, rubbing her shoulders with a hoof until the unicorn calmed down. Glancing at her friend appreciatively, she said, "Thank you, Princess. I know now that, despite the mistakes I made, and the ones I will more likely make in the future, I am still a good pony."

"I am glad to hear that. I just want to ensure you all you are good ponies," Princess Celestia said, beaming at them. "And you all mean a lot to many other good ponies out there. Despite the worst universes out there, which I will not show you, because of how traumatic they would be, you are wonderful, and unique. And thus-"

The screen buzzed with an odd burst of visional slapdash objects. Celestia blinked at this as it happened once, twice, and on the thrice buzz, a rather glorious stallion was visible.

"Why, dear Celestia," the alicorn stallion said, grinning at her, "you're showing your subjects the other worlds and universes, and you didn't think to introduce them to me?"

Celestia's smile, which was usually a playful one, seemed to be even more teasing than usual. "Prince Solaris, just because you are one of the few of us who has mastered the Astral Screen, doesn't mean you need to be introduced every time."

"Oh, but I do," he exclaimed, flicking his flowing mane that glowed like gentle flames behind his strong neck. "After all, you and only a hoofful of Celestias have really learned about this, and if we're going to keep tabs, I might as well have my say in it.

"Lest you forget that when visitors from a Solly world nearly unmade my kingdom?"

"They did no such thing," Celestia responded in a playful tease. "You said so yourself then, stop trying to guilt-trip us Celestias!"

Prince Solaris laughed, thumping one of his powerful hooves against his equally sturdy chest. "Oh, but I am the one who has to be tough, with several alicorn mares who try to use their charm; which, I must add, is unique among you all. You have that playful but motherly side to you that separates you from all the others, like you were just teaching your little ponies here."

"Prince Solaris, you should know better," she said, raising an eyebrow, "than to intrude in a lesson with my students. You wouldn't like if it I intruded in a lesson with yours?"

"Those young stallions would have hearts dancing in their eyes if they saw you, my dear. Kind of like some of your subjects are with me."

Princess Celestia glanced at her subjects to see what her male counterpart was talking about. Indeed, most of the mares staring at Prince Solaris, in all his masculine, royal stature, and were almost shameless in their attraction.

Fluttershy was hiding her face again, using her forelegs and her wings to make sure the prince didn't see. Rainbow Dash was openly staring, mouth open, saliva building in shameless lust. Twilight Sparkle was staring with wide eyes and a red face, and sparks shot from her horn in a mortifying display that she tried to hide. Rarity was openly swooning, fanning herself with her hipster beret.

Only Applejack and Pinkie Pie weren't openly drooling like this. "Will y'all get ahold of yurselves?" Applejack scolded them. "He's just Princess Celestia, but a stallion! Y'all wouldn't be like this with male counterparts, y'all didn't drool over male Twilight!"

Prince Solaris glanced back at Celestia. "Was that my Dusk?"

"Another one, one that's living a more bizarre version of our world."

Pinkie Pie was just waving at the prince, until he eventually waved back. "How did my Pinkie, or your female Pinkie… Pinkie in general, how'd I almost unmake Equestria?"

"You didn't, my little pony."

"Was it with the Party Cannon? The Pinkie Cannon? Did you have your towel when the world was unmade? One should always have a towel in case the world is unmade."

Prince Solaris chuckled. "Oh my, Solly, you must have your hooves full with this one."

"She's a treasure," Celestia assured him, "just like Bubble Berry."

"You hear that?" Pinkie exclaimed. "I'm a treasure! Pirates are gonna wanna plunder me for booty! Yarr!"

She began miming swinging a cutlass around with her right foreleg, hobbling on a pretend peg leg with her left one. As she did this, Prince Solaris laughed some more.

"We should have done this sooner, Solly," he said. "I mean, I don't know why we haven't introduced ourselves to our subjects in other worlds more. Maybe it'd solve some of the more grisly worlds we've seen-"

His words were cut off when his image, and the sound, wavered violently, an irritating buzz cutting off his voice. When he spoke again, the buzz and static grew stronger, drowning him out.

"Prince Solaris?"

Princess Celestia's mirth was gone, concern that worried everypony present now in her voice. She used her magic, golden light surrounding the screen. Then she closed her eyes and let out a strained grunt.

Twilight and Rarity recognized the look immediately. When a unicorn is stuck casting a spell, it is like getting a hoof or a wing caught in the door. It's a painful squeeze that one cannot escape from without "yanking" the limb out, but with magic, you have to focus when your mind is ringing with pain.

Princess Celestia stood on all fours to focus on the magic. The static was filling the screen, and the buzzing noise growing in pitch. The princess's magic became stronger, but nothing was calming down fast.

"What's happening?" Twilight shouted. Fluttershy was hiding behind her, clutching the unicorn in fear. "Princess Celestia, what's wrong?"

Rarity clutched Applejack in terror, and the farm pony tried to hold her. Rainbow Dash was glancing between all her friends, Captain Rallying Cry, and the princess.

Pinkie Pie was staring at the screen, her lips wrapped around the straw to her drink. Her blue eyes weren't even blinking, rather traveling back and forth across the garbled rectangle, as if she was reading something.

Then a scream burst from the screen, startling everypony except for the struggling princess. They all saw it: a pony with razor sharp teeth, howling up at the sky in rage. The pony had been wearing furs and a headdress, almost completely covering her yellow coat and pink mane.

The screen flashed again, and a blue eye amid dense crystals narrowed. They could sense the emotions: hatred, determination, lividness. The long lashes on the eye seemed vaguely familiar.


THE CONNECTION!

I HAVE MADE THE CONNECTION!

PRINCESS CELESTIA, YOU ARE PUTTING UP SUCH A FIGHT! FORGIVE ME FOR THIS!


The princess strained, growling in concentration. When she opened her eyes, the glow of goldenrod magic was radiating from her pupils.

The screen flashed again, and the ponies all saw the imagine of an armor-clad pegasus, so horribly burned on one side that they couldn't see anything recognizable but a flicker of prismatic mane, dive-bomb another pony. The image was simply the pegasus stabbing an earth pony through the chest with a spear.

The room was starting to shake. The Ponyville ponies clung to each other more, panic rising in them. Pinkie hadn't moved, she was staring with wide eyes at the screen.

A violent shake bucked almost everypony off their hooves. Rainbow crashed in Captain Rally, knocking them both down. The princess stayed firm, Pinkie didn't budge.

The screen roared to life, as an army of charging earth ponies barreled towards a smaller army of unicorns. Magic shot from the unicorns struck dead earth ponies, but they stampeded forward. One of them screamed, static ruining his voice, "F-r Co--a-der A-pl----k!"

"Stop this," Princess Celestia growled, then shouted, "whoever this is, desist!!"


NO! I CANNOT FAIL HERE!

SHE'S PUTTING UP TOO MUCH OF A FIGHT!

COME ON, PINK SAMURAI! I NEED YOU! WE ALL NEED YOU!

IS THE SPELL EVEN WORKING? PLEASE BE DRAWN FORWARD, PINK SAMURAI!


Cackling ponies leapt at a terrified soldier pony, violently beating her and even dancing atop her. One of them was wearing a mask that would have been comical in a normal situation, but she was the one leading the beating.

"-ow d--e y-- ha-- - par-- --- N-T inv--- us, t-- cl-wns?" was all that could be made out from the jester pony. "BR--G --T TH- CLOW-S!"

Princess Celestia ground her hooves into the floor. So determined was her resolve, that her magic had spread to her hooves, causing the ground under her to burn with her intense magic. The vibrations being sent around the room were horrifying to everypony in the room.

Everypony except Pinkie, who started to walk towards the screen. Rainbow Dash saw her stepping forward, and reached out to stop her. In a brief moment, she saw her friend's eyes were not their normal blue.

They were the same blue as the Astral Screen's original form.

Rainbow was knocked down by another humongous tremor, and the dazed pegasus tried to think of how an earthquake could shake her in the air. Though she didn't wonder long, as she saw Pinkie still heading towards the screen, which was bursting with so magic energy, sparks and bolts shot from the edges.

"Pinkie, what the feather are you doing?" Rainbow screamed. "Pinkie!"

The screen was then filled by a lavender unicorns face. It was difficult to tell exactly who it was, as there was so much malice in her eyes, mana-touched runes dancing violently on her face, and a thick hat covering her head. The amount of magic pouring from her lengthy horn, brimming in her eyes as she focused at the spell, that Rainbow Dash had to shield her eyes.

"Feathering hay," she shrieked. "Was that-"

"This is my destiny," the lavender unicorn spoke in a husky voice none of the ponies in the room recognized.

"Stop," Celestia ordered, her eyes now brimming with goldenrod magic. "Who is that? Who are you?"

The static and buzzing were now so powerful, the ponies had to cover their ears to dampen the migraine effect it was having on them. Celestia was in agony as she fought, but didn't back down. The room shook as if a giant had picked it up and was trying to, rather aggressively, figure out what was inside by rattling it.

Pinkie Pie didn't stop as she walked towards the screen. At the same time, her friends managed to look over at her, as she reached out with her free foreleg towards the screen.

"Oh wow," she said, as naturally blissful as any normal statement from Pinkie would be, "do I want to start a new game? Yes!"

Her friends screamed at her to stop, but it fell to deaf ears. When Pinkie pressed the Astral Screen, a musical note played, almost as if to acknowledge the touch. The static cleared up in the touched area, and a bright light shone from the entire screen, illuminating the whole room.

And when the glow was gone, and the Astral Screen stopped fighting Celestia, Pinkie Pie had vanished without a trace.


IT IS DONE.

PINKIE PIE… WELCOME TO EQUESTRIA DIVIDED.

WAIT, NO! I'M LOSING CONTROL! CELESTIA'S CONTROL WAS TOO STRONG! WHERE IS SHE?

WHERE IS SHE?!

OH NO. I CAN ONLY HOPE THAT SHE STARTS HER QUEST HERE IN A SAFE SPOT!

I CAN ONLY NOW PRAY FOR YOUR SURVIVAL…

PINKIE PIE, THE PINK SAMURAI.


Pinkie Pie blinked her eyes, her mind sharply coming to focus again. She remembered seeing the Astral Screen buzzing out like a bad TV screen, then there was beautiful music and images on it. The party pony didn't even realize she was approaching it at first.

It had been… it was hard to explain, but it was like the screen was displaying something to her, and maybe just to her, images of what she could desire most, and it be touchable. Thus, she couldn't resist touching it, and agreeing to playing a game; she did love games after all.

Pinkie smiled at the thought of playing a new game, then blinked in astonishment. Princess Celestia would probably be mad that she had touched the screen, she would have to apologize for that; once she went back inside.

Oh. That was something Pinkie noticed once she stopped pondering what she would say to Celestia about inappropriately poking the Astral Screen. The party pony noticed she was outside, and the bright blue sky was above her. And grassy green ground was below her.

About a little over a mile below her, that was.

"Oh," she said, and then gravity seized control. "Bird fe-eeeeeaaaatheeeeers!"

Pinkie screamed and flapped her forelegs wildly. Panic was leading right now, as not even the random party pony could understand how she was in a room with her friends, her princess, and a magical screen that her see a male version of her princess, and was now plummeting to her death.

"Bad word, bad word, bad words I've heard Dashie use when she thinks no pony is looking," Pinkie screamed, flapping her hooves more. She could see the ground rapidly approaching, the wind racing through her mane and screaming past her ears.

Pinkie struggled to stay conscious, blacking out as the velocity started to become too much. She reached into her mane, pulled her towel out, and tried to parachute with it. It yanked right out of her hooves.

"Bird feathers again," she screamed.

She was halfway to a very messy death, and a real feeling of mortal peril sank into Pinkie's mind. Though the wind was carrying her voice away from even her own ears, she cried out to Rainbow Dash to help, Celestia, Fluttershy, anypony she could think of.

Frantically searching through her mane, she had only a split second to see the pegasus flying beneath her. He had one second as well, which was used to glance up at the noise he had faintly heard, and say, "What the f-"

Pinkie Pie bounced off the pegasus, at an angle that helped to faintly slow her fall. She had managed to body-blow his helmet off, as well as fracturing several of his wing bones, his skull, and jaw. They both were now plummeting, but his wing mate was nearby enough for the conscious one of the two.

Pinkie, unable to ascertain what she had just impacted with, reached out and grabbed the pegasus that was still flying. This pegasus, armored and holding a spear in its forelegs, suddenly felt herself being yanked down to the earth by the earth pony clinging to her hind legs.

"Feather Tartarus," the second pegasus screamed as the unexpected weight made her drop her weapon. She desperately tried to shake off Pinkie, flapping her wings in an impossible attempt to stay flying. It succeeded in slowing down their fall.

When the fall lessened in speed greatly, the violent shake of the pegasus shook Pinkie off her hind legs, kicking the earth pony in a small arc upwards and then tumbling down again. The party pony hurtled down towards a gathering of trees, and one of the tallest was right at the front.

Branches smacked into her, slowing her fall again but much more painfully now. Trying to grasp one, she felt the leaves whipping against her like cruel lashes. One of the more sturdy branches bent when she impacted it, and then snapped when she hit the soft, grassy ground.

Every part of her body felt sore as Tartarus, the pain was mind-numbing. Pinkie Pie lay there, listening to herself breathe. This eventually helped her dawn on the fact that she was still alive.

"Systems check," she muttered to herself.

She wiggled all her hooves. No shooting pains there, so she very slowly tried to pick herself up. The burning sores were still there, but no strong agony that would signify to her if she had broken something. Pinkie had one broken a leg, which was when she was trying new tricks on a trampoline, and no similar pains were there.

Pinkie pulled herself up, stretching her limbs. She let out a loud, relieved sigh, and then giggled. She snorted, and laughed. "I survived that," she exclaimed to herself. Pumping her hooves up in the air, she let out the greatest laugh a survivor of something like that could.

That was her towel drifted down and covered her face. Pinkie removed it, and giggled with equal gusto over surviving. "Hello, towel! Never leave home without it!"

As she tucked her trusty towel back in her mane, a song started to kick in from… nowhere. Pinkie reached up to adjust her headphones, and then realized they weren't there. Her hyperactive mind tried to track back to when they fell off, where her gicPod could have gone; she didn't recall losing them, they weren't even on when she appeared a mile up back there. After all, she knew this music, and it had been on her gicPod.

She tapped her head, which was where the music seemed to be coming from. The song haltered, then changed with another knock to the noggin. It changed with a third knock, then turned off after she gave her head a little shake.

It took a lot to confuse Pinkie; this is a lot. "What," she muttered to herself, "the… well, it's cool, but what the b-"

Crashing noises in the trees behind her. She turned around to see the two pegasi she had impacted into on her way down dashing against the branches. The mare was holding onto the stallion, trying to guide them but rather futile now.

When they hit the ground, Pinkie noticed just how bad they were. The stallion was unconscious, bleeding from his mouth, with several broken bones from his wings to his jaw. The mare, bleeding from all kinds of scratches and cuts due to the trees, had broken her wings and left foreleg.

Pinkie quickly approached them, until the mare stood up on shaky legs. Her furious breathing was accented by the hissing of lost teeth. When she glared at Pinkie, the amount of blood on her face, and even her body where the armor wasn't covering, terrified the party pony.

"You," the pegasus spat out, blood flecks flying from her mouth, landing on the crest on the front of her armor. The hoplite hobbled towards Pinkie, squinting in a mix of pain and hatred.

"Please, I'm so sorry," Pinkie exclaimed. "I didn't mean to-"

"You're dead!" The hoplite shouted, taking more unbalanced steps towards Pinkie. "House… Stormwing… owns the skies… not… you!"

Though her hissing words were fierce, she could barely stand. Pinkie stared at her in confusion and worry, especially when she heard her snarling. But when the hoplite almost collapsed, Pinkie realized the guttural growling wasn't coming from the mare.

The party pony realized, like the music from before, it was coming from nowhere; this time, though, it wasn't just inside Pinkie's head.

Something… Pinkie couldn't even describe it, it was just something, leapt out from deeper in the woods, at the hoplite mare. And it wasn't alone. At least three more of the monsters pounced from the dark part of the woods, onto the two pegasi.

The monsters ripped apart the ponies, right before Pinkie's eyes.

It almost felt like a slow-motion experience to her, seeing ponies being murdered in front of her. Pinkie had never seen a pony die, and now, the most brutal of deaths was happening only a couple yards from her.

The stallion pegasus was lucky to be unconscious, because he didn't feel when his throat was torn from his neck by a blue monster's teeth. His legs were ripped the sockets, followed by the wings, draining the blood on his armored body. The three monsters tore at him, and the smell of gore clouded the air; Pinkie felt sick immediately, but was too locked up to throw up.

The mare stallion wasn't so lucky to be unconscious. The leading monster stomped on her with its hooves, then bit at her face. Shrieking and attempting to fight back, the pegasus swung at her attacker as her ear and a good portion of her scalp was ripped from her head.

When the monster tore it away, the blood was flung through the air. Some splashed on Pinkie's face, and she flinched as if struck.

The hoplite mare screamed in agony, but managed to throw a decent punch with her good foreleg. When the beast growled from the impact, it twisted its head. Pinkie saw then what the monster was.

It was a pony. A pony with razor-sharp teeth, lizard eyes, scaly skin, and horns, but a pony nonetheless. And it was eating another pony.

The hoplite's punch was the last blow she managed to deal. The monster pony dropped the patch of skin it had torn from its prey, then lunged at the mare's throat. When it sunk its predatory teeth into her neck, it shook its victim around savagely.

The hoplite's choked scream warbled, then gurgled as blood shot from the mortal wound. Her eyes rolled up in her head as she went into shock, and then became a rag doll in the monster pony's jaws.

With the most sickening crunch and rip one could imagine, the monster pony broke its victim's neck to finish her for good, then ripped out a sizable amount from her neck. Chewing it, blood dripping from its mouth, it then swallowed and let out a long howl of victory.

The three monster ponies behind it also let out howls, pausing from dining on the other hoplite. The woods echoed with their cries, and it seemed nature approved, as many noises of the wild could be heard in the distance in agreement.

Pinkie just stood there, frozen, breathing hard. Her mind and heart were racing so hard, felt like she was going to faint at any moment. She had to fight doing so, even if the intense fear was encouraging her to. She also had to fight throwing up, bursting into tears, and exploding in outrage at the murderers.

Pony murderers. Ponies had murdered fellow ponies. They didn't stop there, they ate fellow ponies. The thought of such a thing made Pinkie's stomach dive so hard, she gagged and struggled hard to not lose her lunch.

That was when the monster pony saw her. It growled, feral, and started to walk towards her like a wild cat. The monster pony had green scales growing from its yellow coat, its lizard-like tail swishing behind it as it moved. It regarded Pinkie with bared teeth.

"Stay back," Pinkie desperately tried to say, but her primal fear made the words come out as a muffled whisper. She trotted backwards, her heart pounding so hard that it felt like it was trying to escape her chest. "Please… stay back!"

The monster pony licked its chops, cleaning the blood from its jaw. A magenta feather from the hoplite mare drifted from its maw as well. It almost seemed to be grinning as it stared Pinkie down; she was easy prey to the monster pony, scared and helpless.

"No, stay back," Pinkie shrieked. She reached in her mane, and chucked the first solid thing her hooves came upon: Twilight's juicer. The small but still weighty appliance was hurled at the monster pony with a desperate cry.

It bounced off the beastly equine's forehead. The monster would have dodged an attack like that normally, but it had come from seemingly nowhere. It regarded the juicer with a slightly puzzled look, then snarled again and glared at Pinkie.

The monster pony positioned itself like a cat ready to pounce. Pinkie had seen cats, especially Rarity's kitty Opal, do this before they gave somepony a vicious scratching. Only after what Pinkie had seen, she was sure a scratching wasn't in the beast's mind.

"I said," she declared, summoning all her courage to defeat this wide-awake nightmare, "stay… BACK!"

As the feral pony leapt at her, Pinkie pulled her party cannon from wherever it was that she kept it (and only she knew). With a click of a button, the monster equine was treated to a powerful blast of confetti, brightly-lit tablecloths, and plastic cutlery.

The cannon's blast sent the feral beast flying backwards, howling as it was tangled up in tablecloths and streams. It slammed against a tree and fell to the ground, a thrashing, festive mess.

The other pony monsters saw this happen, and then turned towards Pinkie with narrowed, lizard eyes. The party pony felt mortal dread seize her up again, but managed to escape it when she heard the first monster pony rip through the tablecloth.

"I'm leaving this so-not-a-party," she exclaimed, cranking her party cannon's power level up to its highest. She hopped on top of it, and kicked the button, adding, "Byes!"

The maximum level of a party cannon is designed to fully dress up a room as big as the main hall of Canterlot Castle. It is said by the designers that a pony should not use this setting, as the sheer force of the cannon would send it flying back into the user.

This was why Pinkie was now on top of it. Her cannon shot out enough decorations to blind and daze the monster ponies, and send her careening out of the forest. Pinkie clung to the shaft of her cannon, as it carried her away from the cannibal ponies.

And straight into a battlefield.

Technically, the fight was just starting. Earth ponies were charging at unicorns, the former bellowing war cries. The clinking of their chain mail and plate sounded like a giant machine galloping rather than ponies. The unicorns kept their position, and charged up magic in their horns.

Magic shot across the battlefield, striking down earth ponies. Some of the blasts were deflected or shrugged off by the ponies-at-arms, but most blasts were fatal. Earth ponies were struck in the face and chest, killed instantly. Limbs were blown off, one was decapitated by a well-aimed blast, a few were penetrated through the eye.

Pinkie was traveling straight down the middle. A magic blast reflected off her party cannon's side, another one singed the top of her poofy mane. She screamed but didn't dare let go of her cannon, until she collided into the side of a charging stallion.

The earth ponies met the unicorns in full force as Pinkie and the large stallion rolled and crashed to the side. Powerful hooves, clad in armor similar to Captain Rally's metal shoes, bucked and kicked at unicorns. Tails with weapons tied to them swung at lethal force, daggers on the brim of helms thrust forward.

Pinkie saw it as she landed from her party cannon wipe-out. Unicorns were teleporting, blinking as it was called with fast-paced teleportation (from what Twilight had told her). The magical ponies were evading the physical attacks, but not all were fast enough. She saw unicorns being bludgeoned and hacked, stomped to death by fierce earth ponies.

Ponies were killing ponies. Right in front of her, again. Only now, it was a mass killing, a war. She was in the middle of a war. Her brain threatened to lock up on her, unable to comprehend this all at once.

As she saw a unicorn get his head smashed to a bloody pulp under the hooves of an earth pony, she heard a rather vicious snort. The stallion she had careened into was standing up, and glancing at it, she felt a similar terror to the one the cannibal, monster pony she had encountered a minute ago.

The massive stallion, as large as Big Macintosh, was covered in plate mail from head to flank. Large steel daggers on its helm were formed like a horn and tusks, the points gleaming in the sunlight. Pinkie could see the stallion narrowing his eyes at her through the rather limited eye sockets that helm had.

When he kicked up dirt, she briefly saw a horseshoe symbol on its shoulder. Despite her predicament, Pinkie wondered for a brief second what that was.

"It's stampeding time," the juggernaut stallion roared.

"No," Pinkie screamed. "No it isn't!"

The plate-covered stallion bellowed as he charged at her, the sound almost amplified by the grating at the bottom of his helm. She hopped back on her cannon, and pressed the button again. The intense force of her party projection hit the juggernaut full force.

He was knocked back, somersaulting with loud impact noises. Then, as the confetti and balloons cleared up, the honking noises that the cannon made barely heard over the battlefield, the juggernaut stood right back up.

It reared, and charged again. Pinkie was already wheeling backwards, clinging to the cannon as it was hurtling towards the charging earth ponies. The armored equine shifted and split to avoid taking a cannon to the face, some glancing back to wonder what in Tartarus that was.

"Is that a Cultist?" she heard one puzzled mare shouting to her fellow soldiers.

Pinkie was staring backwards to tilt the cannon in the proper direction, avoiding hitting anypony. When she glanced back in the direction she was retreating from, she saw the juggernaut stallion closing the distance between them.

"Do not want," she cried out, desperately trying to push the button again with a scrambling hoof, panic and the intense speed making her fumble. "Do not want stampeding!"

She failed to hit the button in time, and the stallion crashed right into the front of her party cannon. The horn and tusk spikes on his helm almost locked around the muzzle, pushing her improv ride as he tried to gore her with those blades.

"Get off," Pinkie shouted. The momentum of the ride was coming to a halt, as the juggernaut plowed the cannon downwards so that the wheels ground into the dirt. He started to position himself, preparing to flip the cannon with his incredible girth.

Pinkie whimpered at the realization of what would happen if he succeeded. Her hoof finally found the button for the party cannon, and hit it again, her mind calculating that with this last burst, she was going to be out of ammo.

It was enough though, as a point-blank, full power party cannon blast sent the juggernaut flying backwards, crashing into several ponies-at-arms and knocking them all down. The soldier ponies tried to get the juggernaut back on his hooves, but he was so dazed that he was having trouble remembering his name and how could he remove the pound of confetti stuck in his eyes.

Pinkie's third trip on the party cannon was rushing through back of the army, practically pinball'ing against ponies-at-arms near the back. Pegasi, armored and wielding spears, dive-bombed her but missed; she could feel the sharp rush of wind every time.

Wheeling to a stop at the base of a tall hill, she all but fell off the party cannon. Her mane was creased forward from all the wind power, almost covering her eyes. Still, she could see the armored ponies running after her.

The battle was still going on, with the shouting of earth ponies and magic blasts of unicorns echoing around the plains. Once in a while, the pained cry of a fatally struck pony pierced the war zone, deaths physically felt as well as heard.

Pinkie could barely grasp it all, though it hardly mattered when she saw angry soldiers charging at her. Ditching her party cannon, which vanished as the earth ponies made their way towards it, she galloped up the hill.

"This cannot be real," she thought to herself, her buzzing mind faintly agreeing. "This cannot be happening… ponies don't kill ponies! They don't eat ponies! They don't-ACK!"

She ducked as pegasi troops dove-bomb her. Her reactionary skills paid off, as the pegasus hoplite who had attacked her missed and careened over her. The earth ponies behind her weren't so lucky.

"It's House Stormwing," one of the soldiers shouted, right before a spear made its way into his throat. He was flipped onto his back as the hoplite pressed the attack, shanking him as blood geysered out of the mortal wound.

The other earth ponies swung at the pegasi, swinging ball-and-chain tail maces and thrusting their steel shoe hooves at the pegasi. The hoplites were too fast, however, and countered as well as dodged.

Pinkie had always admired Rainbow Dash's agility and style, the pegasi athleticism something enchanting to behold when done well. This style of combat, that mixed fighting with aerial prowess, was almost as hypnotically impressive.

The party pony almost admired how graceful the pegasi hoplites were in dodging the attacks of the earth ponies, avoiding blows that surely would have shattered their bones if they had made their mark. But the impressiveness stopped when the hoplites used their spears, tridents, and daggers to stab the earth ponies to death.

The earth soldiers were dead in a manner of seconds, and the pegasi were in the air again. All of them glancing at Pinkie, the party pony started to run again. Considering her an easy target, they started to fly at her.

An explosive bang echoed around the hillside, and one of the pegasi fell to the ground, a bloody wound in his side that the armor didn't cover. His comrades flew down and surrounded him, searching for the attacker.

"We've got a shooter here," one of them barked. "Get him to safety, fan out and find the bastard, now!"

Abandoning the hunt on Pinkie, the pegasi shot off with lightning speed, there one second and gone the next. The party pony glanced all around, trying to ensure they wouldn't attack her again.

When she was looking, she spotted a rather posh pony hiding behind a tree, holding what appeared to be a long, slim version of her party cannon. He was wearing fancy clothes, including a hat that Pinkie, under normal circumstances, would have liked to try on.

The posh pony spotted her staring at him, and he moved his hoof to his mouth in a "shush" motion, glancing back up at the sky. The wind rustled, as if to remind Pinkie of a group of murdering pegasi around; it also made the posh pony's tabard, which bore the symbol of a pristine diamond, flutter rather tellingly.

Pinkie nodded at who she assumed was the shooter, and continued to gallop off. The posh pony watched her go, raising an eyebrow.

While Pinkie tried to reach the top of the hill, she tried to reason with herself again. "Killing… each other… I cannot understand this! Ponies are supposed to be friends with each other! Why is this happening? I was just with my friends… oh no! Where are they?
"Are they here too? Did they get sent here when that big screen start shining? Shining so bright that the next thing we knew, we were here? Because fuzzy pickles and… and…"

She stopped for a second to take deep breaths. Her mind was fizzing out on her, and that was not something Pinkie was used to. After halting for a much needed breather, she tried to make sense of this senseless world.

"Okay, maybe Princess Celestia is just showing me some kind of war-torn reality," she thought. "Yeah yeah! She wants to show us how bad it is! Maybe she noticed I thought those swords were cool… and wanted me to learn a lesson?"

"Alright, Princess, I see it now," she said, under her breath as she was still worried about the pegasi hoplites. "Please bring me back now, I don't want to be part of this! I don't want to see any more killing!"

A sound unlike any Pinkie had heard came from the battlefield. It was like a powerful hum, a bumblebee on some serious adrenaline and one of Vinyl's powerful amplifiers. When she turned, a bright light that reminded her of the sun could be seen on the ground.

It was a beam of light, fired from a larger cannon than her own. The white-hot ray was a straight line of death, and she could see earth ponies falling to the ground, parts of them burned off or incinerated.

"No," Pinkie screamed. The cannon fired again, unicorns safely out of the way due to blinking to the side as earth ponies tried to part their ranks in time. The smell of burning flesh and melting metal was carried in the wind, as well as the screams of those burned horribly.

"No, stop! Princess! I don't want to see any more!" Pinkie shrieked. "They're dying! I cannot bear this! Please make it stop!"

She covered her eyes as tears flowed from them, sobbing bitterly and uncontrollably. Pinkie didn't know how long she was up there crying, she just knew that she stayed there until the tears stopped coming.

Then the part of her that she was trying to ignore, trying to avoid, and hating with every fiber of its being, came creeping back at her. That part of her had been thrilled, eating up the adrenaline-pumping moments of chase and parry, the part that could get behind combat.

"No," she defiantly told that part. "No, I do not care if part of me likes it, I will not allow it to define me. I am Pinkie Pie! I make ponies smile, I throw parties, and I enjoy seeing my friends happy. I do not kill ponies!"

"You seem like you have a lot on your mind."

"I do," she said to the mysterious voice. When she turned, she saw a pony wearing a cloak and hood, a chain with a spiked club at the end draped over its shoulders.

"That's nice, I could help you with that," the cloaked stallion suggested. He had a monotone kind of voice that suggested he had no idea of understanding of the situation.

"I'm sorry, but," Pinkie stammered, "who… who are you?"

That's when a big smile spread across the pony's face. It was so wide and seemingly uncontrollable, it could have split his face apart. He pulled the chain off his back and started spinning the flail in his hoof.

"I can take whatever is on your mind off," he suggested in a cackling voice, "the hard way!"

Pinkie shrieked as she leapt back, avoiding the fatal swing of the chain. The cloaked stallion gave chase, and she continued to run up the hill.

"Come on, everypony," the insane pony shouted. "Let's put a smile on this one's face!"

Pinkie reached the top of the hill, which sported many trees and boulders, like some kind of nature scenic spot. Other ponies popped out from behind those trees and boulders, all of them wearing shoddily-stitched cloaks and hats, sporting sadistic grins or cold-blooded scowls.

The party pony skidded to a stop as she realized she was surrounded, the insane pony walking up behind her. That's when something skittered out from around the rock, on spiked feet that made metallic clicks on the stone.

"Hey, look, our Smiling Doll wants a hug," one of the crazy ponies exclaimed. She cackled, and added, "Give 'er a 'ug, ya big lug!"

"Hug her," the ponies chanted. "Hug her, hug her, hug her!"

Pinkie was as terrified as she was confused. When she saw what exactly the Smiling Doll, the one that skittered on top of the boulder, was, she felt herself lock up in even more fear and perplexity.

The marequins that Rarity used had a strong resemblance to this creature. It appeared to be a moving marequin or a big toy, designed by a sadistic mind. In the shape of a pony and moving like a spider, it walked on blades rather than hooves. Spikes dotted up its forelegs, and jutted out from its maneless head.

As it moved closer to Pinkie, she saw its skin was stitched up, as if making a painfully tight-fitted suit with its own skin. Its mouth was sewn up with bloody wire, and its eyes were covered with large buttons.

The Smiling Doll was bobbing and skittering, as if trying to find its prey while blind. As it searched, a small opening in its chest, decorated like some vicious maw, was dripping tiny bits of blood and gore. The macabre creature shook its flank, displaying a Cutie Mark of a red sickle.

Then it stopped moving, so suddenly that Pinkie thought it was just a puppet, its strings having been dropped. The Smiling Doll lifted its head, staring right at her. When she gasped in fear, it scurried towards her.

"HUG," the hooded ponies exclaimed and cheered. "Hug her!"

The Smiling Doll leapt at Pinkie Pie, bladed forelegs spread, button eyes appearing to be staring at Pinkie's soul. It was a do-or-die moment for the party pony, and one second off would result in being scissored in half and shredded.

Fortunately, Pinkie had fought the daze of violence and death long enough to react in that one second. Many have accused Pinkie of not being observant; it's quite the opposite, in that she can be so attentive to details, she can miss something obvious.

Pinkie swung left foreleg into the mareiquin monster's chest, impacting hard in that maw-like design. She followed up with a blow to the shoulder, right above the deadly blade of the monster's foreleg, and then, with a bellowing shout, she uppercut the Smiling Doll into the air.

When it fell back down to the ground, it crashed against the boulder. Its legs clanked around like a shelf full of metal cutlery.

It stood right back up. Pinkie stared at it in amazement, wondering why it wasn't showing any signs of being in pain or dazed. Its head was bobbing around loosely, like a broken stuffed animal, but that was the only sign of damage.

Before Pinkie could wonder if the Smiling Doll was alive or not, the hooded ponies were all shouting again. "Hey, that was cool!" they exclaimed. Some were stamping their hooves in applause, some were grinning, some were glaring hateful daggers at Pinkie.

Pinkie returned the eye daggers with her own. "How dare you all," she declared. Her face scrunched up in fury as she shouted, "Hugs are a beautiful, wonderful thing! Hugs are for friends and family and loved ones! How dare you try to taint hugs by turning them into a weapon!

"I," she cracked her hooves, and took a fighting stance, "may not know what is going on here, I may be lost and dazed and confused, but I know one thing! No pony is going to make hugs a bad thing while I'm around!"

The hooded ponies exchanged glances, confused, even though some of them were nodding or shaking their heads. Pinkie wondered why they were all acting so randomly for a bunch of crazy hooded ponies. She had even noticed some had gone from maniacal grinning to furious frowning, and right back again.

Before any more violence could ensue, one of the ponies let out a loud whistle. "House Earthborn troops," she shouted, pointing to the side at the large collection of trees at the hilltop. Armored earth ponies were charging from the wooded area, on a beeline towards the mad ponies. "Retreat! Fall back! Move your flanks, ya pack of bastards and fellow weirdoes!"

"We get it," another hooded pony declared back, as the group of insane equine started to run down the side of the hill. "We'll see you next time, mares and gentlecolts!"

The earth pony warriors were still running at the hooded ones, one of them shouting, "Cultists! Get the cultists!"

Pinkie didn't know what to do. The earth pony warriors had attacked her earlier without warning, and the hooded ponies, which she guessed were cultists, were even worse. But as she saw the Smiling Doll skitter off, heading bobbing around like a broken plushie, she realized she had better luck reasoning with the earth ponies.

Holding her forelegs up in surrender, the earth ponies that the cultists had called House Earthborn, were upon her in a manner of seconds. Some of the soldiers stopped at the hillside, watching the cultists flee into a small wooded area near a river. They abandoned the hunt, and turned towards Pinkie.

"Who are you?" one of the stallions asked her.

The scars on his face intimidated Pinkie. It appeared as if some creature had clawed him, and the wound hadn't healed properly. His armor was better in appearance than him, as it shone like polished brass; that horseshoe insignia she had seen earlier was stamped at the front of his armor.

Distracted by her observations, Pinkie didn't realize she was making the soldier mad. "I asked you a question," he shouted, prodding her in the chest with his armored hoof. The poke hurt slightly, and Pinkie winced.

"Hey now," she chided him, "it's impolite to poke, you know that?"

"She's a cultist, Captain," one of the soldiers declared.

"If she is," the stallion in front of Pinkie said, "then why didn't she retreat with the others?"

"It's a trick! You know how crazy and diabolical the cultists are."

"I'd advise you stop using words you don't know the definition to, even if they are the right words," the captain snarked. "Now then, what do we do with you?"

"Why not ask the Apple General?" one of the soldiers asked. "She said that we should come to her if there was activity up here."

"Why don't we just execute her?" another soldier asked. "Weren't that our orders?"

Pinkie stared at all of them, shaking in worry. She had seen them charge the cultists, and even if that armor of theirs was slowing them down, she wondered if she could outrun them. She raised her hoof timidly, and said, "I want to see the Apple General. That's sounds good!"

"And somewhat familiar too," she thought ominously.

"Don't push your luck, stranger," the captain snapped. "Search her for weapons, Cadet Lucky Stomp."

One of the mare ponies-at-arms inspected Pinkie's mane and tail, under her legs, and even inside her mouth. As the party pony wondered what that was about, the Earthborn soldiers roughly pushed her forward.

They walked through the trees into a large clearing, where several tents were set up. Pinkie wondered why it appeared that they were having a camping trip, when she spotted one pony peering through a looking glass at a gap in the trees. From this angle, Pinkie guessed that they must be observing the fight.

Only a few ponies were there, moving about the campsite. They glanced at the party, especially at Pinkie, and continued their business.

At a small table, three ponies were gathered around and studying a map, moving small figures. The leader was wearing a steel hat shaped like a cowpoke's, rather similar to Applejack's cloth headwear. She was spitting angry, Pinkie could hear her shouting from their distance.

"A Sunray Cannon," the armored hat wearing pony exclaimed, pounding the table. "They brought one of those abominations! They must'ave known we were coming!"

"There's nothing suggesting that," one of the other ponies at the table said. "Maybe they had planned on attacking in the morning?"

"Attacking New Ponyville in the morning is suicide, especially crossing tha river! They wouldn't bring this unless they were prepared!"

"Our enemy always does," the third pony at the table said. "We must get a message to General Cloud Kicker!"

The hat wearing pony nodded, walking away from the table. Pinkie Pie, and her entourage of soldiers/kidnappers, watched as she approached an armored pegasus, who saluted at attention.

"Fly over to tha general, an' tell 'er," she pointed with a bright yellow hoof, "to have tha troops scatter, scramble 'round an' try ta avoid lining up fur that cannon ta incinerate them. We need ta think smart ta destroy that horrid thing!"

"Should the pegasi auxiliaries swoop in to handle it?" the pegasus asked.

The hat wearing pony shook her head. "It will be well-defended, as they kinnot move fast. Any surprise attacks from the air will be shot down fastur than'a clay pigeon at a rifle convention; they have learned that lesson after years of fighting House Stormwing."

"Yes, Apple General," the pegasus exclaimed, saluting again. "General Cloud Kicker will not fail you, we'll crush that cannon."

"We're all in this together, succeeding or failing as one. Report back here once you've spoken ta her. For Equestria."

"For Equestria!"

The pegasus flew off, and the Apple General glanced at the captain holding Pinkie captive. "Captain Double Kick," she said, "yur report on yur patrol?"

"Cultist activity, but we chased them off," Captain Double Kick exclaimed, also saluting. "The area seems fairly secure, though we found this pony. Possibly a lost civilian, a spy, a cultist, we do not know."

"What?" the Apple General barked. "You find sum random pony, an' ya don't know anything about her?"

She approached in a huff. "Ah'm trying to fight a battle here, an'our soldiers are dying out thar. They are being incinerated by one of Twilight Sparkle's evil machines, and y'all want me to handle a lost civilian?"

"W-with all due respect, Apple General," the captain stammered, "your orders were to consult with you on major issues, and we don't know what to do with her; we couldn't just kill her, she's an earth pony."

The Apple General sighed and peered from under the brim of her helmet. Her light green eyes inspected Pinkie, saying, "Well, who are… you…"

Both Pinkie and the Apple General went wide-eyed, their jaws dropping. Pinkie knew who this was. Up-close, it didn't matter if she was wearing a steel hat, thick and polished armor, and was somewhat older. She knew this farm pony who was being called Apple General."

"Apple Fritter," Pinkie exclaimed. "Thank goodness I found you! Everypony around here is crazy! And this captain of yours poked me rather rudely!"

Apple Fritter stared at Pinkie still, unable to speak or act. Pinkie wondered why Fritter appeared older, not too aged, but definitely not as young as she remembered her; she appeared at least a decade older. Maybe it was the fact that her grass-green hair wasn't in playful pigtails, but cropped shoulder-length.

"Apple General Fritter," Captain Double Kick asked. "Do you know this pony?"

When no pony said anything else, the captain spun Pinkie around, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her. "Who in Tartarus are you? Tell us now!"

"I… I am…," Pinkie stammered.

"Tell us, or I'm going to start breaking your legs one by one!"

"Now there's no need to get violent!"

Pinkie glanced back at Apple Fritter, who was still staring at her with the utmost incredulousness. When the party pony turned back to the captain, movement in the back caught her eye.

She could see, at the edge of the clearing from the direction they had entered from, a trio of unicorns. One of them was attaching a device to his horn, and taking aim at the camp. The way the device was glowing, Pinkie felt it wasn't going to be good news for those on the receiving end.

She frantically gestured at the unicorns, spitting out, "Look out! Over there!"

"Oh really?" Captain Double Kick scoffed. "Like we're going to fall for that-"

A magical blast from the unicorn struck the whole camp, like a huge gust of wind. Pinkie Pie felt it impact her, a dizzying effect that made her limbs grow weak, her head spin, and her mind go numb. She collapsed, and then Captain Double Kick fell on her.

The incredible weight of the stallion pinned her down, knocking the air out of her. Captain Kick was out cold, and Pinkie heard the earth ponies around her falling down like bags of sugar.

"Nice job," Pinkie heard somepony say. It had to be the unicorns, she could hear them trotting towards the campsite. "It never fails to amaze me how easy it is to stupefy earth ponies with a stun spell."

"To be fair to them, it was amplified," another of the unicorns said. "Wait, what am I saying? I don't want to be fair."

"Okay, let's take care of them now. Light Barrier, Psy Coat, take care of them."

Pinkie could hear the three walking towards them, then stopping. The sound of something being unsheathed came twice, and then she heard… oh Celestia…

Two ponies were gagging and gurgling, their thrashing bodies thumping against the ground. Pinkie couldn't see well, because she was still trapped underneath Captain Kick. She could barely move her body, much less get out from under him to stop the unicorns from what they were doing.

That's when she saw one of the unicorns kneeling down next to the fallen form of Cadet Lucky Stomp. The unicorn was using her magic to levitate a long dagger that was stained with blood. With as much emotion as spreading jam on bread, the unicorn slit Stomp's throat.

Lucky Stomp started thrashing as her body tried desperately to breathe. Pinkie closed her eyes, tightening up. "No no no," she thought in a panic. "No! Please! Somepony help her! Stop this! She's going to die!"

The unicorn started to approach Pinkie and Captain Kick. The dagger, now stained with Stomp's blood, was gleaming in the sunlight. As the unicorn stepped forward, her eyes glanced to the right, and she stopped.

"Is that," she said aloud, then gasped. "It is! Light Barrier, Luster Mind, come here! Look who we caught up here!"

The other two unicorns trotted over, and both gasped. "Oh my," the leader of the three exclaimed. "The Apple General, Apple Fritter!"

Apple Fritter was squirming feebly, fighting the spell that had hit her full blast. It was like her body was keeping her down, betraying her.

"Our intel was more fruitful, pun not intended," the lead unicorn said. "An Apple General… who would like the honors?"

"You kidding?" Psy Coat said, nudging the struggling Apple Fritter with her hoof. "You're the leader here, you get the honors of killing her, boss!"

"Are you kidding? She needs to go back to our Archmagister alive! The information we can pump from her will be priceless! I mean…"

Luster Mind pulled a long dagger from a sheathe, and this blade had teeth like a saw. "We don't want her running or bucking. Who wants the honor of amputating one of her back legs?"

Apple Fritter struggled more, and Psy Coat put her hoof on her side. "Let Light Barrier, I will hold her down."

"No," Pinkie growled, almost a whisper. As she saw Luster Mind levitate the serrated knife over to Light Barrier, Pinkie felt a desperate panic like none before.

Her mind started flashing. She knew Apple Fritter so well, the Apple family member was one of the closest to Ponyville. She loved to cook food for people, and she would always give treats to everypony. Fritter was always smiles and care, and would come help Applejack and her family if they had a massive deed to do, like raise a barn.

Pinkie saw that serrated knife being brought down towards Apple Fritter's back leg. She felt a rush of adrenaline, so powerful that she shrugged Captain Kick off her like it was nothing.

With a scream that she couldn't seriously tell if it was hers or not, Pinkie leapt at Light Barrier. The unicorn had absolutely no time to react before the pink hoof smashed into the side of his face, sending him sprawling and crashing head-first into the rock circle of the camp's fire pit.

Psy Coat tried to draw her knife, but Pinkie swung around and bucked, trying to remember how Applejack would do it. Though this wasn't an apple tree, her back hooves did a good job at bucking here.

The female unicorn went sailing back a few yards, then lay in a crumpled heap. Luster Mind managed to jump back in time to avoid a follow-up swing from Pinkie.

The two ponies standing stared each other down, one levitating a dagger, one putting her hooves up and snarling viciously.

"You aren't Earthborn," Luster Mind noted, not moving except for his mouth. "You would be wearing armor… unless you are special forces like me… but even House Earthborn's special forces wears armor. So tell me, who are you?"

"My name is Pinkie Pie," she snarled, "and I am Apple Fritter's friend. I will not let you touch her, you… murderer!"

Luster Mind stared at her, blinking a great deal. Shaking his head, he let out a small laugh. "Oh my, you have to be a cultist. There's no one so demented… wait."

The unicorn stepped towards her, knife still raised. "Is the Cult trying to replicate its leader? Is that… no, don't answer, guessing the actions of you abominations is pointless."

He used his magic to swing the knife at Pinkie, a wide arc that she barely dodged by leaping back. Staring each other down again, he narrowed his eyes and said, "Might just break your neck then."

The amount of magic radiating from his horn picked up, and Pinkie felt an arcane pull to her head and neck. He was trying to break her neck, twisting her cranium against her will. She struggled, straining hard against the powerful grasp.

With a loud shout, Pinkie yanked her head the other way, freeing herself from the grasp. Luster Mind's blue-gray magic stopped with a burst of spell sparks.

"Okay, seriously," he spat, pointing the knife at her, "who are you?"

"I am," Pinkie announced, staring at him with ferocity in her blue eyes, "the pony who is going to kick your flank!"

The music that seemingly came from nowhere started up again, in full force now. Pinkie recognized it as music from her gicPod, but how it was playing, seemingly inside her head, was something she was still very confused about.

Didn't matter now though, she had a friend to save and a flank to kick.

Pinkie Pie feigned jumping at Luster Mind, and he swung his knife at her. With this wide open stance, she actually leapt at him this time, kicking him in mid-air. He fell back, clutching a bloody nose.

Snarling, he slashed at her again. She leaned back, and part of her curly bang was sliced off. Using her momentum, she back-hoofed him, his nose suffering from more damage. He collapsed on his knees, desperately trying to stop the bleeding.

The knife shot towards Pinkie, and she had to roll to the left to avoid it. It shanked into the ground, then cut through the dirt to slice towards Pinkie. She managed to dodge again, but she could feel the sharp wind breezed by her face.

Pinkie was banking everything on martial arts she had seen, plus her own energy. With another opening, she leapt at Luster. When he jumped back, she turned her jump into a cartwheel the moment she hit the ground. Her back legs clobbered his face, bringing him down.

She was about to punch him, when she felt her tail violently twitch. Realizing her Pinkie Sense was more vital since a flower pot was the least of her worries, she zipped backwards. Luster's dagger shot down where her head had been moments ago, and plunged into his right foreleg when he couldn't stop his own magic momentum.

Screaming in pain, he yanked out the dagger with his teeth, and turned to run towards the unconscious Light Barrier. Rummaging through his pack with his magic, he pulled out the device Pinkie had seen them use earlier.

As he used hoof and magic to attach it to his horn, she galloped towards him. "Oh no you don't," she shouted as she sprung towards him, front hoof pulled back.

Luster's magic powered up the device, making it glow brightly as the humming of arcane energy started to charge. With Pinkie closing in, he fired off the spell early, shouting, "Stun Splash!"

"Pinkie Punch!"

Mauve hoof met blue-gray forehead, just as a blast of stunning magic hit Pinkie. Luster Mind was sent careening into a tent, knocking it down on him. Pinkie collapsed on the ground, barely conscious.

She struggled desperately to stay awake, but darkness and exhaustion were settling in. The stunning spell felt a lot like a sleeping spell, something she had once seen Twilight cast, but felt more forceful; it was not a spell that gently willed a pony to comply with the magic, but a dominating attack on her senses.

Pinkie couldn't keep her eyes open, inviting the grass as her mattress. Before she fell asleep, the music dying down too, she murmured to herself, "K.O. … I win."


The soldiers of House Earthborn managed to shake off the stun splash spell after a couple minutes They first checked those that had their throats slit, and grieved; none of them had survived.

Apple Fritter was helping to move the bodies of their fallen when Captain Double Kick approached her. "The unicorns are ready to be executed. We have them in one of the tents… which was knocked down, for some reason."

"Don't kill 'em, captain. We need ta question them."

"But the Supreme Commander said-"

"Ah know what she said, but things have changed. They said they had intel, we need ta see if we can git anything from them. Now… what of Pinkie Pie?"

"Apple General?" Captain Kick balked, staring at her. "You don't think for a moment she's-"

"Ah don't know what ta think!" Apple Fritter snapped. She glanced at the unconscious, mauve mare, as three soldiers stood around her. "We need ta… we need ta see the Supreme Commander about this."

"Is that wise?"

"If there're any repercussions, Ah will gladly take them. But this is more important than anything else."

Fritter trotted towards her tent, saying, "Gather everything, we are moving out. We're heading back ta New Ponyville, and we're taking our prisoners too. … Y'all know what ta do with tha dead. We will wait until our messenger returns from the battlefield ta give specific orders on a tactical retreat."

"We might lose the fight-"

"They brought a Sunray Cannon, Ah should have ordered a retreat from the start!"

Apple Fritter made her way into her tent, throwing off her hat and letting it clang to the side. Collapsing in a chair, she ran a hoof through her green mane, staring up at the ceiling. Her mind was spinning so hard, she didn't notice when Captain Kick entered.

"No offense, Apple General," he said, "but we are going to lose troops in any fight. A Sunray Cannon is not enough to pull back."

"It is when we kin force it out of commission by drawing the fight to nighttime," she said without looking at him. "Ah know how to fight, but Supreme Commander Applejack wants to be more aggressive. Ah am more defensive."

"If we pull back now, the Sunray Cannon would store up energy; we've seen them fire at night. They could use it to attack New Ponyville."

"No, we have more troops coming up shortly, bigger and better options. Besides, we have cultists around here, like yuh said. And Ah'm getting a terrible feeling that tha other Houses aren't sitting this fight out."

Captain Kick nodded. "Aye, that is true. If we pull back, House Moon & Star will have to deal with them. But Apple General, what of this mare who calls herself Pinkie Pie?"

Apple Fritter narrowed her eyes. "Applejack will know what ta do with ‘er."


(Meanwhile, back in Pinkie Pie's home universe…)

"Pinkie?" Twilight said. Her voice raised considerably, as did her panic. "Pinkie! PINKIE PIE!"

She frantically looked all around the circular room, as her friends were doing to. Princess Celestia was rubbing her head, the headache from struggling with the Astral Screen having done a real number on her. Captain Rallying Cry was standing up, helping Fluttershy to her hooves.

"Where are you?" Twilight continued to cry out. "Where… where are you?"

"Pinkster, if yur hiding, this ain't funny, sugarcube," Applejack shouted. "Come on, no pranks or jokes or anythin'! Show us yur smiling face, girl!"

Fluttershy, still shaking from the intense experience, glanced around at the ceiling. It would have been silly to search there for a non-pegasus pony, but it was Pinkie Pie. "P-puh-please, Pinkie?" she whispered as loud as she could. "Please, come out!"

"Where is she?" Rainbow Dash hollered. She was flying around the room, wings buzzing with how hard she was flapping. "Pinkie!" She opened the door to the room, glancing outside. "You step out? PINKIE!"

Rainbow flew out, calling out to Pinkie. Twilight started to shake, tears forming in her eyes; she almost collapsed, but Applejack caught her.

"Princess Celestia," Rarity approached their leader, lightly touching her side. "Your Royal Highness, are you okay?"

"I… I am fine," Celestia managed to say. Shaking away some of the magical feedback headache she was suffering, she glanced at the Astral Screen. "What… Pinkie Pie…"

"She's gone missing, your Highness!" Rarity gestured at the Astral Screen. "She walked up, touched the screen, and with a flash of light blue magic, she was gone!"

"What? But the Astral Screen doesn't teleport, it is just that, a screen!"

Princess Celestia sounded like she was talking to herself more so, and immediately, her horn lit up with magic again. She was straining, it appeared rather painful to Rarity, who knew how agonizing using magic when exhausted could be.

Twilight Sparkle managed to calm down, and found her voice again. "Princess," she said, staring at her mentor with all the hope in the world, "what happened? Is Pinkie Pie just pranking us?"

Celestia was silent for a minute, then the magic in her horn faded. She hung her head, rubbing at her temple. "I… I don't understand. I cannot sense Pinkie Pie's presence in the castle. She couldn't have made it that far in a manner of seconds."

"No," Twilight whimpered. She stared at Applejack, as if willing her to answer, then she cried out. "No! You mean she was sent to another universe? An alternate universe?"

"The Astral Screen doesn't work that way!" Princess Celestia rubbed her temple harder, looking at the screen. After the flash of cyan light, it had stopped making noise and light, and had reverted back to its basic, light blue state. As they spoke, it started to curl back up into an orb.

"Pinkie touched it, though," Twilight exclaimed. "Could she have triggered something? Princess-"

"Twilight Sparkle, I am telling you, it cannot do that!"

The princess stared long and hard at the Astral Screen, which finished folding up into an orb. "You cannot send ponies, or objects, or anything but an image through the Screen! Not even I could use it as a doorway. It takes the most powerful of magic to make the trip to another universe."

"But Pinkie touched tha screen," Applejack said, "and she was gone!"

"Oh no," Fluttershy whimpered. "Oh no no no… this is bad… Pinkie…"

"Everypony, please calm down," Princess Celestia ordered. "I know this looks bad, but I cannot focus if you are panicking. So please, calm down, and allow me to study the Screen."

When she tried to use her magic on the Astral Screen, the same kind of static came back. A sharp pain in Celestia's horn made her flinch, and release it. "Something," she gasped as she rubbed her horn, "something has thrown off the ley lines."

"But, but," Twilight stammered, "that would require large amounts of magic, wouldn't it?"

"Indeed it would, and I was trying to stop the Astral Screen from overloading and crashing."

The princess stared long and hard at the blue orb, and then glanced at her honorary student. "Twilight, dear… you didn't cast anything, did you?"

"No, no! I didn't! I swear!"

"Calm down, I'm not accusing you. I know that unicorns sometimes use magic when terrified or panicked, I just need to know-"

"I didn't, I swear I didn't, Princess Celestia! Please, believe me."

"I do, my dear."

She trotted over and wrapped one of her brilliant wings around Twilight. "Just please calm down, Twilight Sparkle."

"I didn't cast any magic either," Rarity spoke up. She glanced between Celestia and the Astral Screen, then heard Fluttershy sobbing. "Oh darling…"

"Pinkie Pie vanished," Fluttershy whimpered, tears in her eyes. "Pinkie… she was there, and then she was gone. After all that horrible noise… oh no… no no no!"

"Darling, please!" Rarity wrapped her forelegs around Fluttershy, pulling her close to her. Fluttershy shivered and shook against her friend.

"She just walked up and touched the screen, and was gone," Fluttershy bawled. "Who's going to tell Gummy? Who's going to tell Octavia? I can't do that, Rarity! Oh, Pinkie Pie, where are you?"

Princess Celestia stopped her wing-hug with Twilight to walk back to the throne in the room. She sat down on it, and focused all her magic again. The orb crackled defiantly, and Celestia squinted in pain and concentration.

"It's fighting me," she muttered. "It's overloaded and possibly damaged. This could take a while."

"Princess, you're in pain," Twilight said. "Your… your horn…"

She pointed at her leader's head, and though Celestia couldn't see it, her horn was singed black. Every now and then, sparks shot out uncontrollably. The princess merely shook her head.

"I showed you the Astral Screen, therefore this is my fault; I must fix this."

"I… I can help."

"No, Twilight Sparkle. It took me years and years to master the magic of this device. I could not explain it to you in so short of time… but I still could use your help."

"Whatever ya want, princess," Applejack said, bowing politely, "we kin help! Just help us help ya git Pinkie back ta us!"

"Please fetch Princess Luna, if you can rouse her at this time of day. She knows all about the Astral Screen. And if you can fetch the medical staff, I require a special remedy to help me fight this pain, for better concentration."

"I will fetch Doctor Bedside immediately," Captain Rally said, bowing to his princess. "Is there anything else we can do?"

"Yes. If you can tell Rainbow Dash to…"

She glanced down, a guilty look flashing by her regal face. Twilight felt damaged, seeing her beloved princess like this.

"Tell Rainbow Dash to stop yelling for Pinkie Pie. Pinkie is not here, and… I can hear Rainbow Dash from here. It is sadly distracting."

"Yes, Princess Celestia," Twilight Sparkle said, bowing.

Applejack left with her, galloping down the halls to find Rainbow Dash. Captain Rallying Cry hurried off on his own way. Rarity was still holding Fluttershy, petting the sobbing pegasus's back, as she herself tried not to cry.

Princess Celestia focused her magic on the Astral Screen, and it sparked so aggressively against her that it caused a splitting pain in her horn, adding on to the agony. It stopped her for a few seconds, and she went right back to concentrating.

The pain she could endure. What was unbearable was hearing off in the distance, Rainbow Dash shouting, "Pinkie! Pinkie, where are you? Come out here right now! It's not funny! Pinkie! … Please? Pinkie?"


SAVE CURRENT PROGRESS?

> YES. NO.

Prologue Part 3 - The Tempering of the Samurai

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Lady Fluttershy sniffed the air. It was traveling from the battle that was taking place a great distance from the Everfree Forest; however, she could still smell the telltale signs of a true battle between House Earthborn and House Moon & Star.

"Blood," she said to Iron Will, who stood next to her. "Arcane magic. Gunpowder. Gore. I can practically smell every pony, every injury, every death in this wind."

"Your sense of smell is amazing, but," Iron Will said, rubbing his chin, "can you tell who's winning the fight?"

Fluttershy closed her eyes and focused again. The leader of the minotaurs watched her, sensing the power of nature radiating from her.

The trees rustled towards her, even against the wind. Blades of grass pointed towards her, and the clouds up in the sky drifted around as if caught in a gentle cyclone. Iron Will could almost smell the fight now, as he flared his large nostrils.

"House Earthborn… has retreated," Fluttershy said. "They are more than likely heading back to New Ponyville… but why I do not know."

"Are their numbers that low?" Iron Will asked. He narrowed his eyes. "Those stubborn earth ponies usually wait until the vast majority of their army has been crushed; they are stupid like that."

"No, their numbers are fine. Maybe when our scouts return, we could get some answers."

"If you would like, Lady Fluttershy, I could send some Iron Bulls out there to take prisoners and crush some opposition. When the enemy starts to pull, you send in the bull."

"No, it's not necessary. And you made that up that saying just now," she chided him, though she smirked as well. "I sense House Moon & Star is heading off too… I am rather curious, but I do not want to chase either of them, not when they both are injured.

"The unicorns have a long way to run if they want sanctuary," she pondered, tapping her chin..

Iron Will crossed his arms, growling out, "Redheart's Refuse is the only place close enough for a real, tactical retreat, unless they plan on camping out."

"If that is the case, our scouts will report back, and you have my permission to use Iron Bulls and some of our forces to shred that encampment. We could easily finish what House Earthborn started, especially at night.

"Twilight Sparkle believes her troops are strong at night because they believe in Luna," Fluttershy spat at both names, her eyes flaring with green magic. "I have shown her delusions of nighttime safety are not only false, but costly."

Iron Will chuckled. He remembered Centurion Lunar Eye had led a hundred House Moon & Star against a growing expansion of the Everfree Forest. The leader of the minotaurs had led the strike, and the results had been one-sided: Lunar Eye was crushed under Will's hoof, and ninety-six unicorns died with minimal casualties to House Everfree.

Fluttershy took in another deep breath, and then halted. Iron Will watched his leader with some concern, especially when she ground her teeth. Turning away, she started to trot back into Everfree Forest.

"Is everything alright, Lady Fluttershy?"

"I wish to go contact the Everfree Liege," she said. Her tone made it clear that it wasn't up for debate. "If the scouts come back, you will make the call, Iron Will. Take what forces you desire, if you deem attack necessary."

"Of course, Lady Fluttershy. But again, I wish to ask, what is wrong? Why must you contact the Everfree Liege?"

Fluttershy lowered her head. Her pink-coral colored mane draped down, covering her face from the sides. She spoke with such a mixture of emotions, he couldn't guess which one was most prevalent.

"I sense something, something or somepony out there, that is triggering something I haven't sensed in years," she admitted. "It's… impossible to explain."

She walked off without another word. Iron Will glanced out in the direction of the battle, and wondered what in Tartarus could have shaken the Lady of the Forest like that.


Trixie Lulamoon hated to retreat, especially when her side was clearly winning. The Sunray Cannon they had brought had worked very well, it was worth bringing so many slaves on such a long trip.

Still, she had her orders. The two Centurions she had brought were managing the troops, helping to attend to the wounded. The slaves were kept in close proximity of the Knights, to ensure they did not act up as night started to set; the stupid earth and pegasi ponies feared the moon, Princess Luna's reputation still instilled fear after all this time.

Luna was a symbol of power and reinforcement to the unicorns of House Moon & Star, and the sign of an iron hoof over all other races. Trixie wished she could have met Luna, she would love to know how well the princess carried herself in front of others.

Trixie vented her frustrations over the retreat by kicking a slave, right in the scar where his Cutie Mark used to be. She snarled as she passed by the Sunray Cannon, observing the dials. "There's barely any power in here," she exclaimed. "Why in Tartarus has The Great and Powerful Trixie's Sunray Cannon not been set to absorb moonlight?"

"Grand Inquisitor," Centurion Zen Dream said, approaching her with a graceful bow, "they have been. The moon is only a thin crescent tonight, and the clouds are too thick, blocking our princess's night blessing.

Trixie ground her teeth in her growing exasperation. "House Stormwing, it has to be, the cloud pushing bastards! They seek to hamper our most powerful tool. Trixie will not allow this. Gather every Seraph we have, and we don't have enough, make some! Trixie won't have clouds stopping her plans tonight!"

Centurion Zen Dream blinked in surprise. "Plans for tonight, Grand Inquisitor? I thought we were stopping to make camp for the night."

"We are going to move at the top of the hour, Centurion, so get ready."

"But… the wounded-"

"If the medics cannot help them, then we will carry them. Trixie has her orders, and you have yours. Now go!"

As he walked off, Trixie rubbed her chin in deep thought. To top off all the problems she was having, one of her special strike teams has still not reported back. The intel that the leader of the resistance from House Earthborn would be here was good, but could her proud unicorn forces had been caught?

She was getting rather fed up with losing troops. Unicorns were the most capable being in all of Equestria, they did not get picked off like a dumb, diamond dog pack. Trixie felt like setting something, or somepony, on fire.

Glancing at the slaves, she wondered if she would take to her Inquisition troops' way of relieving stress. But reason settled in before she started conjuring up a fire spell, realizing their losses were too great to sacrifice more, even slaves.

"Whatever," she said to herself as she turned away from the slaves. "Maybe Trixie will burn some earth ponies when we get to where we are aiming for tonight."


The Arqueteer trotted into a cave, dug rather slapdash but effective enough to provide a quick retreat. With no torches, he illuminated from a spell radiating from his horn.

Eventually he met up with the group of ponies who had travelled with him. He had to resist scowling when he saw them, as they were laughing and exchanging stories; this wasn't a war to them, it was a game.

"I wonder how much I could pay this bastards to shoot each other," the Arqueteer thought as he approached. "They'd do anything for gold. Maybe I could convince them to shoot themselves in the hoof for the right amount of bits."

"Hey, Fine Shine," the leader of the Ponies of Fortune said, waving his hoof at the Arqueteer. "Bag any? Me and the boys had a bet on who shot the most."

A diamond dog holding a torch nearby nodded and cackled. "Yes yes, they did! And none of them bet on you."

"Oy, shut up!"

One of the mercenaries of House Whitegold pelted the diamond dog with a gold coin. Three of the mercs, including the one who threw it, dove for it. The leader shook his head, glancing back at Fine Shine.

"Gotta say, it was a little bit like open season out there," he said. "Shooting fish in a barrel, if you know what I mean."

"I fail to see why anypony would shoot a fish in a barrel," Fine Shine said. He glanced at his arquebus, which he carried in a sling on his side. "Rifles do not puncture through water that well."

"It's a metaphor, just think about it!"

"Do you mind just telling me your casualty report, Golden Shot? It is growing late, and I'd like to leave this battle area just in case we have late night visitors."

Most of the mercs were busy fighting over the gold coin still, the diamond dog trying to claim it too. Hooves and fists flew, pained shouts and bloody snouts resulted. Fine Shine was now fully convinced House Whitegold could have won that fight if he threw a bag of coins in the middle of the battlefield.

"Sorry, but we don't have a certain number," Golden Shot said. He juggled a throwing dagger in his hoof, though he was staring at his own rifle that he kept nearby. "We just used those amazing hoof cannons that House Whitegold generously provided, and let fire into the troops from afar."

"You do know that your pay comes from how many casualties and injuries you cause, don't you?"

One of the mercenaries stood up, staring down Fine Shine angrily. "Hey now, fancy boy, don't you start thinking of stifling our pay! Or we may use these rifles on you!"

Golden Shot held up a hoof at the disobedient merc, and looked back at Fine Shine. "Okay, we'll come up with a number for you soon, and we'll be generous since we cannot prove. But pray tell, did you get any enemies of your house? Hate to think you're lecturing me when you ain't got anything."

"I managed to injure some troops, if you must know, including a hoplite from House Stormwing."

"You shot one of those flying buggers? Now that's impressive!" Golden Shot juggled his throwing dagger once more, adding, "I have yet to claim a kill on one of them."

"They're too damn fast to get," one of the ponies of fortune exclaimed. "I may be a pegasus, but I think they're a right lot of cowards; flying fast and striking like scorpion stings. It ain't sporting."

"Sport has nothing to do with it," Fine Shine snapped. "You are paid by our Mistress Rarity to do what is best for our city and house. If you cannot handle House Stormwing's troops, or any other troops, we'll just send you for reconnoissance on, say, House Everfree. Or a changeling hive."

The threat would have been intimidating for any normal pony, but the mercenary shrugged. "Meh. You pay me enough, I'll find out where the Bitch of the Forest is for you."

Golden Shot laughed at his colleague's gusto. "Well, if you could shoot a Stormwing troop like Fine Shine did, maybe I'd believe you. I would have liked to have been there when he placed a round in that pegasus!"

Mentioning the event trigged Shine's memory. He rubbed his facial hair in thought, murmuring to himself.

"Something wrong?" Golden Shot asked.

"It may be nothing, but when I was scouting and shot that Stormwing pegasus, there was a pink earth pony running from them, from the battlefield. She seemed… terrified, out of place. She was screaming things I didn't understand."

Golden Shot frowned in concern. "Cultist?"

"I hope not, I was hoping they wouldn't be out here; we have enough trouble at Baltimare."

"I just hope they ain't sending pink ponies out into battles; I hate having to kill mares."

The mercenary leader of the bunch then proceeded to deck his fellow mercs and the diamond dog to get that gold coin, claiming it for his own.

Fine Shine pursed his lips. Sometimes, he did wish House Whitegold had a real army. He'd be much more happy fight like a soldier, instead of babysitting a pack of greedy mercenaries.


The Laughing Mare wasn't happy.

It was the most horrifying thing to her followers. In that dark room, they all tried desperately to make the situation funny. Jesters of Baltimare juggled anything they could find. Revelers danced and fiddled with Smiling Dolls, Laughing Dead put on rather dark displays of how much they could damage themselves. One pony turned on a tune on a Macabre Music Machine, trying one of the mare's favorite songs on the organ.

The Laughing Mare sat on a throne that was made entirely out of various body parts of many beings, mostly pony. Her head leaned down into her hooves, which she rubbed together relentlessly, as if trying to start a fire. She hadn't stopped for a couple hours now; some of the cultists were worried she might set her hooves ablaze.

The cultists laughed for her. They guffawed, they howled, they giggled incessantly, they snorted and wheezed. Laughter was the reason they had all joined up, and laughter was what kept them going.

And most of all, they feared what The Laughing Mare would do if they stopped laughing.

The Jesters of Baltimare stepped up their game. They started dancing on their hind legs as they performed, added more items to their juggling, more juggling items. One of them was successfully juggling a chain saw, a sickle, a bone saw, and a glass vase when The Laughing Mare spoke.

"Starry eyes have tapered," she exclaimed, ceasing her fore hooves movement. "Ethereal has moved its second knight into play."

The cultists all stopped to hear the words of The Laughing Mare. It must be important, as they were the ones chosen by her to try and entertain her when she had fallen into a funk.

The Macabre Music Machine stopped playing music immediately, and the Jesters of Baltimare dropped their juggling toys; the one with the most impressive juggling set resulted in his left foreleg being amputated by the sickle, and he fell down covering the bleeding one. He was let out peculiar noises that were a combination of pained whimpers and hysterical giggles.

"Is the king's movement solely for me?" The Laughing Mare whispered to herself. Her head bobbed down, the bells on her jester cap jingling. "What of the sib-bishops? Am I receiving views over this?"

The red glow in those empty eye sockets amplified, until they were bright lights, like amplified coal stones. She was grinding her teeth, the gum-less mouth twitching in its seared smile.

"Must protect the queen at all costs," she continued to plan. "The first knight will move out soon, dangerous to fight head on. The cheater and the rabid possum will hunt, the rat will fight, and no pony cares what the rock does.

"Which is precisely why I will keep an eye on the shiny. Members of the Cult of Laughter!" She shouted the last part, making all the ponies, even the one bleeding to death, flinch. Without moving anything but her right foreleg, she flicked her hoof and a snapping sound echoed throughout the hallways.

"Fetch me the Prophets! This war has been amplified a grand deal, and we will not falter! The time for laughter," she grinned, narrowing her glowing, eyeless eyes, "is now."

The cultists all in the room burst into laughter and cheers. The Laughing Mare grinned, drinking in the noise. She glanced around at them: the undead members trotting about merrily, the psycho and the insane and those that perfected both, the fun machines of death, and the one jester rolling around laughing as blood pooled from the amputated leg.

"So you think you can defeat me this way, sister?" The Laughing Mare whispered to herself, her voice a sinister, delighted hiss. "I see your move, and let me tell you, it's so cliché, I saw it coming a mile away. There are badly written stories by magical kindergarten drop-outs better than your plan; thusly, I will crush it, then you.

"Now then," she said, aloud this time, "somepony want to put Bounce Clutch out of his misery? He deserves to go down laughing. Have to say, Bounce, your last performance was delightful, never seen a pony juggle a chain saw and a glass vase."


"Three casualties?" Rainbow Dash shouted furiously. "Three? Sweet Celestia, do you know how damaging that is to our ranks?"

"We don't know how it happened, Force Commander Supreme," Wing Captain Cloudchaser exclaimed, bowing to her leader. "Our patrol… they were ravaged by Everfree Wraiths! And we only have a vague idea what happened!"

The prismatic maned pegasus paced on the cloud. Her armor was still stained with blood, earth pony blood from the soldiers she and her band had picked off when they had been separated from the fight. She glanced back at them, then at the returning wing patrol.

"Commander, I must say now that my wingpony, Bladed Wingtip, will survive his injury," Cloudchaser insisted. She ran a hoof through her mane, grinding her teeth as she endured her leader's stare. "But if I may, I think I know who is behind this."

"Then tell me! Is it Everfree? Moon & Star? The Cult?"

"It was a pink earth pony. She traveled through the battlefield on some weird contraption, and managed to fight with objects we couldn't see coming!"

As Rainbow Dash's good eye widened in shock, the Wing Captain rubbed her mane more. "It," Cloudchaser admitted, terrified to say what was on her mind, "felt eerily familiar. Something… that I think-"

"Say no more," Rainbow Dash exclaimed. "Where are they heading? Scootaloo!"

The other Wing Captain marched up on the cloud, saluting to her leader. "Rainbow Dash, we saw the group taking a few prisoners to New Ponyville! We did not engage, as House Earthborn is taking careful security to their caravan.

"We also believe the Apple General, Apple Fritter, is with this group. This may be incredibly important, if I do say so myself."

Rainbow Dash stared at Scootaloo, seeing some of that impish, foalish excitement that sometimes shone through her hardened, full-grown exterior. The battle scars, though not as numerous as her own, that Scootaloo sported helped Rainbow look over this giddiness that would have received a hoof across the face for most any other pony.

"Scootaloo, Cloudchaser," Rainbow Dash said, turning her head in the direction of New Ponyville, "prepare all the Wing Captains. Summon Gilda and any other gryphon captain or Valkyrie that is within range.

"I want to find out what House Earthborn is up to, I want to know," she snarled and stomped at the cloud, "who killed two of my soldiers. Because if this is as serious as I think it is, our farms to the north are in danger."

"Understood, Force Commander Supreme," Cloudchaser said, saluting.

"Bucking Tartarus below, if they found a way to pull us from the sky…"

Rainbow Dash observed all of the pegasi around her, narrowing her eyes. The burnt eye may have had no pupil but it seemed as focused as her normal eye. "We may have House Moon & Star on the run, we may have killed a fair share of our enemy today…"

"But if House Earthborn is planning something, I want to know what that orange, ground-bound traitor is up to."


Applejack was sitting in a large room, one that was made for the leaders and army ponies of House Earthborn for this city. When New Ponyville had been claimed for their house years ago, this building was immediately made for war and planning. It was delightfully well-designed architecture, as even being inside this war room made Applejack felt powerful.

"All of Equestria could be conquered from here," she thought to herself with a smug smile. She glanced around at the towering walls, the ceiling with the supports that could endure boulders being hurled at it. "This is tha most impressive view Ah think exists. And Ah've been in the Halls of Stone. That says something."

The Supreme Commander of House Earthborn rather preferred New Ponyville, for many reasons. One of those was this, the Hoof Down Tower. Another was to get away from politicians in her house and actually govern a war, not a political show.

The biggest reason was that, it was New Ponyville. When she glanced out the windows around the high room, she saw the large city outside. Ponies, normal ponies, were trotting about on normal business, selling food and goods, being with family. She could see out at Equestria, see how beautiful it still was.

It made her remember the home she lost, how much she had lost, and how much she had gained and won too. This was always enough to keep Applejack focused, no matter how dark the next day was.

All this was just enough to prepare her when Apple General Apple Fritter came in. Applejack was known for keeping a calm demeanor, but her family knew that these days, how much rage could grow in her chest.

"So," Applejack said, trotting to Apple Fritter, "you retreated. We followed tha plan, we crossed tha river, an' met House Moon & Star head on. And you retreated."

Apple Fritter saluted as if nothing was wrong. She spoke formally, like a true soldier. "If you would allow me ta explain, Supreme Commander Applejack, Ah had very good reason to-"

"Ah also heard y'all brought prisoners." She paced around her cousin, keeping her voice down though her anger was rising. "That was against mah orders. We have been pushed, once again, back.

"Do you understand how much we lost because of your actions, Apple Fritter?" she barked, pushing her face right into her's. Green eyes of different shades were locked together, neither backing down.

"How many times have Ah had ta argue with tha Council that you were right fer tha position of Apple General, an' how many times you have allowed tha enemy to push us all back, because you were afraid ta let more soldiers die?

"We are at war, damn it! WAR! Soldiers will die! We have lost family an' friends an' loved ones, an' we will continue to lose them if you continue ta try an' save as many troops as possible!"

She paced around the large war room, then stopped at a window that allowed her to see Shattered Care River, running nearby the glorious city. "You have been there for me as much as my immediate family, Apple Fritter," she said, her voice lowering but her tone as solid. "You helped me, you helped us all, get through the darkest hours of Equestria…

"Please give me a reason to justify yur actions to tha Earth Council. With the lack of progress in the war, there is talk about what our leaders will do to commanders in war who fail to push our agenda."

Apple Fritter spoke, undaunted. "Supreme Commander Applejack, do you really think tha Earth Council will approve fully of executing tha leaders of our army if we don't make more progress? That's beyond senseless!"

"Politicians don't see madness in anything they do, Fritter. To them, we are all, including me, expendable. Another war hero will come up, they will praise them, then dismiss them if they aren't making them look good."

"You are not expendable in any way, Applejack."

The orange earth pony glanced over at Fritter, then trotted over. "Then please, tell me why mah decision ta allow you ta lead this charge has led ta this."

Apple Fritter took off her helmet, setting it on the table. It had felt so heavy on her since she had walked into New Ponyville. "There were three major reasons, not just a simple one as Ah didn't want soldiers ta die.

"The first was that House Moon & Star brought with them a Sunray Cannon. It was devastating, and we did'ant 'ave the proper way to counter it. Our troops were being incinerated, an' tha unicorns were defending it by havin' their slave troops kept our troops in play…"

She grimaced as she thought back. "House Moon & Star literally uses earth ponies an' pegasi as meat shields. And they too become incinerated when the cannon fires."

Applejack snarled, punching the table with her fore hoof. "So it has come ta this, has it? Ah would think unicorns with their so-called superior intellect would realize how that's as wasteful as it is cruel!"

"Ah believe Grand Inquisitor Trixie Lulamoon was leading; while House Moon & Star's generals are all ruthless, only she would be so destructive."

"Either way, ya could have fought against them, Fritter. What were the other reasons?"

"My party on the hill was attacked by cultists, and then by a shock attack patrol of House Moon & Star unicorns. We all could 'ave died then, and we overheard them saying they had received intel about our position."

"Even so," Applejack said, "you didn't have to call off the fight because your situation was compromised. You could have… wait, what?"

The military leader of House Earthborn paused, and stepped up close to Apple Fritter. "Y'all almost died? What exactly happened?"

"The unicorns used their magic-amplifying devices to cast a stun spell that dazed us all. Ah lost several troops, until we were saved by a mare… a single mare…"

Apple Fritter swallowed hard. She could barely look into the eye of Applejack, who was studying her so hard that Fritter felt like her bones were being scanned. Part of worried that, despite being family, an Apple General, and somepony so close to Applejack, she was going to be executed for saying this.

"A mare with a pink coat and mane," she managed to say, "who spoke and acted exactly like Pinkie Pie."

The silence was deafening. So long and hard was Applejack stare, that Fritter worried she might catch afire from how fierce the look of her superior was. Finally, the Supreme Commander barked out a bitter laugh.

"It's a ploy. A trick by the Cult of Laughter, or one of the other houses. They simply found a pink pony ta act like her."

"She had Pinkie Sense," Fritter continued. "She dodged something being thrown down at her head when her tail twitched."

"It's just a damn good impression then, Apple Fritter," Applejack shouted, clenching her hoof in a manner that implied possibly hitting her. "There is no way on Equestria that could be Pinkie Pie!"

"And yet this pony, that was attacked by both cultists and House Moon & Star," Apple Fritter said, "looks the same age as Pinkie did when y'all went off to Canterlot because the liars disappeared."

Applejack growled in fury, and finally swung at Apple Fritter. Her cousin was too fast, jumping back and shouting, "Do you think Ah say this without conviction, Applejack? You think Ah just saw this pony and thought, 'Hurr, hey y'all, it's Pinkie Pie'? No!"

"You are suggesting the impossible!"

"And yet, if our enemy is remaking Pinkie Pie to such detail, we need ta know more," Fritter reasoned. "This could be our greatest threat, Applejack!

"They are making replicas of yur dead friend! And why would they do that? Why do ya think they would?"

"Ah don't know, what do you think, besides trying ta make me and the other leaders all confused?"

"Ah can think of one good reason. Maybe they want ta reactivate the greatest power that died all those years ago."

Applejack stopped advancing on her cousin, and then ground her teeth harder than ever. She thought back the Halls of Stone, to a secret chamber that was constructed for her in private. In that room was a box, decorated with an orange apple insignia, and it contained something that had once been the key to saving Equestria from terrible times like these days.

"Ah want to see this fake," Applejack said, staring at Apple Fritter with her rage subsiding and reason setting in.

"She's in the jail, unconscious."

"Then we'll wait for morning. In tha meantime, Ah have to think."

Applejack trotted out of the room, her body language screaming while she remained silent. Apple Fritter watched her go, then rested at the war room's table, burying her head in her forelegs.

"Is this really a move from tha Cult, or another House?" she thought. "If she is…"

She knocked her hoof against her head, remembering what she heard from the pink mare on the hilltop.

"My name is Pinkie Pie, and I am Apple Fritter's friend. I will not let you touch her, you murderer!"

"Then it doesn't make any gosh-darn sense!"


The jails in New Ponyville were a classic prison: tiny windows, bars, cots, and a chamberpot in each one. The only reason they seemed like such a primitive sight to the unicorn prisoners was that there were very few prisons or dungeons in Equestria.

None of the Houses, and certainly not the Cult, were keen on keeping prisoners of war or criminals. Any being that violated laws or opposed a House, even their own, would usually be executed.

The three unicorns were in a cell each, a tight iron wrap around their horns. It was a primitive, but very effective, way of preventing magic from being cast. The unicorns could not remove the locks no matter what they tried, and it was too tight to allow any magic to be cast without excruciating pain; that in itself was enough to break the concentration needed for magic.

Luster Mind had collapsed on the cot in his cell, wanting a good night sleep before his inevitable fate. Psy Coat paced back and forth until she collapsed, trying to think of something, anything, to escape.

Light Barrier was staring down Pinkie Pie in the cell across from his. She was sleeping on her back on the cot where she had been placed, no restraints on her. Her leg was twitching in her snooze, her mouth wide open and tongue hanging out as she openly snored.

"How can you sleep?" he grumbled. He was bitter, as he was the kind who, since a foal, was not able to get a wink of sleep if he was uncomfortable. The horn brace was keeping him up, and he wanted to vent.

"And what are you?" he snapped as well. "We're all going to die tomorrow, and you're sleeping like a… well, like how I always thought how earth ponies slept! Like a hog!

"I guess you don't have to worry about what is going to happen, as much, because you don't have a horn," he snarled. "And they're going to execute you even though you saved them! Why would you do that? Why?"

His shout woke Pinkie. She examined her jail cell, blinked a great many times, then rushed over to the bars. Wrapping her fore hooves around the bars, she shook them and shouted, "No! Did I have an energy drink again? I swore I wouldn't after the last time!"

Light Barrier groaned and rolled his eyes. "Oh my Celestia, are you a cultist? Were you dropped as a foal, repeatedly?"

Pinkie stopped shouting long enough to recognize the unicorn across from her. She knocked on the bars, tried to open the door, then let out a defeated sigh. "Oh no… I'm really here, aren't I?"

She slammed her head against the bars, whining, "No-oooo, I really thought this was all a dream! This is so wrong! Celestia, Luna, graham crackers!"

"What in Tartarus is wrong with you?" Barrier shouted. "Do you have any idea how bad things are?"

"No," whimpered Pinkie. She drummed her hoof on the bars as she collapsed on her stomach. Her mind was racing again, trying to comprehend everything that had happened.

Celestia wouldn't do something as cruel as send her to another reality; Pinkie had now dismissed the "lesson" theory. Did she fall asleep and, against all logic, was feeling all pain? Why did she feel like she was trapped in a video game?

Her ears perked up. She practically felt the gears clicking in her head until the idea rang perfectly. Her heart soared so high from relief, she worried for a second that it would come out her mouth. That was it! She was stuck in a Coltari game!

Pinkie Pie hadn't played many video games in her life, but the Coltari games she had played were rather fun. She mostly preferred to play with friends (though not Rainbow Dash, she got too competitive).

"That's what happened to me! I'm stuck in a video game," she exclaimed joyfully. "It's so simple! That's why I keep hearing music in my head that was on my gicPod! I wonder what genre I'm stuck in!"

Light Barrier stared at her, jaw dropped, eye twitching.

"What's your favorite game, mister?" she asked innocently. "Just Prance? Super Mareio Sisters? Ponycraft? I love Ponycraft, especially the sequels! Do you?"

She grinned at him as she mimed pressing buttons. "For Flaiur, for the Pegatoss!"

"What," was all Light Barrier could say at first. She shook her head and managed to actually say, "Okay, look, why are you asking me? I thought you thought we were 'murderers,' when you came at us at the camp."

Pinkie tapped her chin. Right now, in her head, she had multiple selections to choose from. Dialogue selections were a fun part of the game for her.

1.) "Well, DUH! But you obviously aren't, since we're in a game!"

2.) "Sorry, I just am not the biggest fan of violent games, like Maretal Kombat!"

3.) "lol, noob, i can pwn u with such epicosity, ur not even wurth the exp 4 my leet dps! lol lol lol lol *snort* lol lololol rofl!!11!"

After mentally choosing option 3, Light Barrier watched her roll on the floor laughing. The unicorn felt his worries melt away listening to that chortling, even though he knew what lay in store for him tomorrow. He let out a heavy sigh, then rested on the cot in his cell.

"I never got to play Coltari," he admitted. He felt defeated in that he was being casual now, but he didn't care anymore at this point. "Never had time to play anything, really. I was drafted into the army when I was young, managed to bring up my magic to be good enough for special forces."

"You must be a real power leveler," Pinkie said as she stopped rolling around. "High magic skills? What are your professions?"

"Well, the magic amplifier I brought is something that most unicorns have trouble with, because it requires great concentration and aim," he said. "Guess that would be like a profession?"

"No no no, professions are skills that aren't directly related to combat," Pinkie said. "C'mon, buddy, you know cooking? Dancing? I would have a high skill in baking, singing, and creating fun tools!"

Light Barrier raised an eyebrow. "Creating fun tools? Like weapons?"

"Well, I would say my party cannon is not a weapon, but I guess I weaponized it. Do you know about creating weapons?"

"The magic amplifier is like a very complicated tool; sometimes you need to fine-tune it. It takes very delicate magic to tune them, and I am good at them. It's why Luster trusts me with the amplified shots."

"Sounds neat! Magic enhancement! But you know what?" Pinkie grinned and clopped her hooves. "All that tuning talk makes me think you're a musician! Do you know how to play?"

Barrier shook his head, then glanced to the side. "No… but I always wanted to try."

"Never too late, Barrier! My sister, she's a musician! And one of my close friends knows all about music! She's amazing!"

As Pinkie Pie rambled on about Vinyl Scratch, Light Barrier sighed to himself. "I shouldn't even be talking. I should hate this pony, she's why I am here… but what the Tartarus. Gonna die, might as well try to enjoy myself while I can."

"Ponyally, I think the ninja class is overpowered," Pinkie was gabbing, "but I'd really like to make my main a samurai, now that I've seen the history of Equestria. You know about samurai, mister?"

"No, but tell me," Barrier said, letting a small smile creep across his face. "I always did like to learn about other cultures, even if it was forbidden."

Pinkie was rather confused why that would be forbidden, but she continued to talk to Barrier. And talk she did, they were up for hours with her talking all about Equestria's history, Coltari games, the best mix of sprinkles on frostings, and family.

Barrier didn't have much to say about his family, he barely remembered them since he was drafted. Though when Pinkie encouraged him to recall the times they had, he felt his shoulders slump, not to mention his heart plummet.

"Oh no," he said. "I was resigned to my fate… until now. I want to see them again! I want them to know I went down fighting, not like this!"

"What are you talking about?"

Before he could answer, the door into the jail cells swung open. Armored earth ponies, carrying black bags and rope, entered and started to unlock the jail cells. Light Barrier tried to fight back, but a blow across his face laid him flat.

Pinkie watched as the earth ponies slipped the cloth bag over his head, blinding him. They tied the rope around his neck, not enough to choke him but securing the bag on his head. She could hear the same happening to the other unicorns.

That's when the earth ponies opened her cell, and headed for her. One of the armored ponies started to say, "Don't try anything funny-"

"I always try something funny!"

Pinkie's exclamation caught the pony-at-arms off-guard, and he took a hoof right under his jaw. She stomped on his left fore hoof, which wasn't armored. The chain mail and plate he was wearing didn't leave her much option, but she was working well with what she had.

With a back hoof attack, she knocked him to the side of her cell, against the wall. Bouncing off him, she back-kicked the second guard to try and suppress her, sending him sprawling out of her cage.

"That's right! You noobs are giving cheap experience, but I'll take it!"

A third guard, wearing leather armor, came rushing at her. The party pony watched her spin around, then she felt her eyes flutter in unison.

Unaware of what this Pinkie Sense meant, she leaned away from the bucking pony. Good thing too, she almost took a couple hooves to the face. With a victorious cackle, Pinkie brought her forelegs down on the pony's backside, and pinned her down.

"Buh-bye now!"

She leapt over the third guard, but failed to swish her tail out of grasp. Using her teeth, the third guard chomped down on her tail, and yanked Pinkie back towards her. Forced to the ground, the other ponies pounced on her.

"Aw drat," Pinkie cursed. "I hate quick-time events!"

"Can we gag her too?" one of the guards grumbled.

The soldier ponies did indeed tie a rope around Pinkie's mouth before putting the blinding hood back on her. She couldn't see where she was going, as the guards forced her along the way by tugging at the rope tied around her neck. The humor she had managed earlier felt like it was melting with every tug.

"Not good, not good," she thought bitterly to herself. "You let yourself get caught so early on, Pinkie, and you aren't a princess, so no pony's going to come rescuing you."

The walk was long, and soon, she heard ponies talking from close by. Pinkie couldn't make out their words exactly, the hood muffled her hearing as well; however, she could tell none of it was pleasant.

She heard jeering, then the sound of food splattering. Unlike the sound of her dropping it carelessly back home, this sounded like it was violently hurled at somepony. The pony in front of her was hit, and Pinkie could smell watermelon in the air.

Her Pinkie Sense let her duck when something was going to hit her head, but when her guard tightened his grip on the rope on her neck, she was hit by an orange. She could feel a dull throb of pain, stinging from the juice left over.

Pinkie wanted to tell the ponies to stop wasting good food, then ask why they were throwing it at her. She would have if she didn't have this rope around her mouth. It was hard for her to choose which was worse due to the gag: that she couldn't talk to the ponies, or that she couldn't eat the food thrown at her.

The forced walk was starting to hurt her feet, not used to trotting normally on such a rough, dirt road. The angry crowd at all sides was growing louder, and then she felt herself being led on a grass field. Before she could enjoy the cool feel on her sore feet, she was led up a wooden stairway.

When she trotted on what sounded to be a wooden platform, she was aggressively pushed down on her rear knees and formed to raise her forelegs. Ropes were tied around her forearms, raised her up in a submissive pose. Pinkie started to feel a cold sweat gathering on her brow, especially with how loud and awful the crowd in front of her sounded to be.

Pinkie Pie waited, and waited, and waited. She tried humming herself to calm down, but that wasn't working. She tried twitching her head around to turn the music back on, if that was indeed where it was coming from. She wanted something, anything, to drown out the jeering cries of the audience.

Then the music turned on inside her head. And she tried desperately shook her head to make it stop…

The crowd stopped jeering and shouting cruel taunts, and then started cheering. Before Pinkie could wonder what was going on, the hood was untied and yanked off her.

As her poofy mane sprung free, she quickly examined her surroundings. She was kneeling on her hind legs on a large wooden platform, one that was stained rather badly with a dark red substance. Her forelegs were being held up and wide open, tied to a couple posts with very strong rope.

The enormous crowd of ponies, the vast majority earth ponies with some pegasi speckled among them. Some were wearing armor, some casual clothing, all looked thrilled. Pinkie Pie could see a large city in the distance; was that where she was being held before, in the jail?

When she glanced to her left, she saw pastures of green, and a wide river, one she had failed to hear until now. The water coasted at a gentle pace, seemingly out of place in this hostile area.

Looking over at her right, the three unicorns were tied up and held in position the same way she was. They were glaring at either the crowd, or the small collection of earth ponies that were standing on the platform with them. One of those ponies was Apple Fritter, wearing armor but no helmet. Another pony, also armored, was one she didn't know.

She did know the one waving to the crowd, and it made her heart skip a beat. The crimson plate armor with chain link, the armored version of a cowpoke's hat, even the eyepatch couldn't hide who it was.

"Ahffulffkk!" Pinkie Pie screamed, struggling to free herself from her bonds to go to Applejack. When she attempted to stand, one of the guards pushed her down.

"Applejack, it's you," she thought. "That has to be you, I'd recognize those freckles on that orange face anywhere! Even with your mane down, I know it's you! Are you okay?
"Oh no… what happened to your eye, Applejack? What happened? Did you hurt herself? You look like a pirate farm pony now… heeheehee! Applejack, hybrid classes are tricky in these games, you know? Pirate farmer, how fun!"

Applejack silenced the crowd after a few more seconds of cheering, a simple gesture that calmed a crowd of what looked to be thousands of ponies.

"Members of House Earthborn," she shouted, her voice loud and proud enough to reach even the back of the crowd, "citizens of New Ponyville! Ah am sure y'all are aware of tha battle that is going on currently!"

Positive shouts and battle cries rippled throughout the audience. Applejack again motioned for silence. "Currently, Apple General Big Macintosh and General Cloud Kicker have chased after House Moon & Star, and we will not allow another set back! We will crush tha self-appointed unicorns, an' any pony or monster that stands in our way!"

The audience roared again. Pinkie stared in confusion at Applejack. Her mind raced so hard over all this new information, she couldn't mentally comprehend Applejack was speaking like that.

"And yet!" Applejack shouted, gesturing at the four ponies tied up on the platform. "They continue their cowardly attempts on our leaders, on our family! We lost many good soldiers today, an' Ah will not stand fer this."

From the audience, one of the ponies hurled a rock at Luster Mind, hitting him in the face. The earth pony, with tears in her eyes, shrieked, "That was for my brother, you horned monster!"

"Settle down, please," Applejack called out. A couple guards headed over to the earth pony, but AJ motioned for them to stop. "It has occurred to me that you all crave blood, vengeance, and most of all, justice!

"After all, who is it that burns our troops alive like if it was a hobby? Who enslaves earth ponies and pegasi, who insists on being superior as they tear our world apart? As they rape Equestria and claim that we are inferior?

"WE ARE EQUESTRIA!" Applejack bellowed, slamming one of her hooves on the platform.

"WE ARE EQUESTRIA!" The audience replied so fervently and loud, Pinkie felt her mane being blown backwards.

"And that's why Ah want all of you to watch this," Applejack declared. "Ah want all of you to see what happens, to refresh your drive for this war. We will not win it until every pony and buffalo is behind our cause one hundred percent!"

Applejack approached Luster Mind, with Apple Fritter and the other pony not far behind. The leader of the unicorn trio snarled as the orange earth pony trotted up to him, never losing eye contact with the one-eyed Apple General.

When they were face to face, Applejack raised her right foreleg and twitched it around a quarter rotation. A metal blade, smooth and oiled slick, slid out from under her armor. It seemed to rest comfortably on top of Applejack's foreleg, as she brought the point dangerously close to Luster Mind's eye.

"Name and rank, unicorn," Applejack said, her hoof blade circling in front of Luster's eye, outlining his pupil.

He pulled back to avoid the blade, and she brought it closer. Finally, he strained to say, "Luster Mind, special forces to Grand Inquisitor Trixie Lulamoon."

"You are aware of what happens to unicorns in our territory, are you not, Luster Mind?"

Luster was brave enough to frown at her. "I do."

"Then Ah would like you to tell me, and all these ponies something."

Applejack tapped her hoof blade on the iron wrap around his horn. The vibrations must have been painful, as Luster Mind winced as if having a nerve pinched. He managed a snarl at her, before she continued.

"Tell everypony here just how you got the information on my Apple General," she ordered. The tapping increased, and though Luster managed to keep a strong face, the pain and annoyance were in his eyes.

"You really think I am so stupid?" he spat at Applejack. He glanced at the hoof blade, saying, "All that awaits me is death, one way or another. I'm not telling you pack of rampaging barbarians anything. You hear?"

"Ah hear."

And she punctured his eye with her hoof blade.

Pinkie Pie screamed against her gag, trying to free herself again. She had just seen Applejack stab a pony in the eye. Her heart, mind, and pulse were all racing so fast, she was afraid the rush would make her pass out.

Luster Mind screamed in agony at first, then hissed in air several times. He was trying to stay firm, letting out moans and grunts, but managing to keep his remaining eye on Applejack's. Blood and fluids oozed freely down his face, down his neck, staining his robes.

"You… will not," he hissed in-between pained gasps, "get anything from me, traitor to the throne. Heretics like you… don't deserve… anything."

"You're going ta use that word, are you?" Applejack said with a sneer. She turned towards the audience, waving the stained hoof blade in the air. "This unicorn calls us heretics! Tell me, House Earthborn, is there any god or deity to which we should bow down to?"

"NO!"

"No, there is not!" she bellowed. "We were the ones lied to, misled! And here you have a member of House Moon & Star, telling us that we are sinners for believing in the greatest hoax of them all."

"Heretic!" Luster Mind shouted. "Celestia will burn you to ashes when she returns-"

Applejack spun around and stabbed him through his foreleg. He strained not to scream, but she twisted it, and his cry of agony was released. When he threw his head back, shrieking as Applejack twisted the blade further, blood flew from his punctured eye.

And the audience was applauding and cheering all the while.

Pinkie was glancing between Applejack torturing Luster Mind, and the happy audience. "No no no," she thought desperately. "Stop applauding, stop laughing, STOP CHEERING! This is not a good thing! This is evil!

"Applejack! What are you doing?! Stop! STOP! This isn't you!"

Psy Coat was shrieking at Applejack to stop, to leave her squad leader alone. One of the Earthborn troops bucked her in the stomach, knocking the wind out of her. "I tire of your insults," the guard spat as Psy tried not to pass out herself.

Applejack shanked Luster Mind in all of his legs, careful not to hit any arteries. His light blue coat now seemed dark, with how much blood had seeped into it. He let his head hang, his crimson life force still dripping from his split eye. The mage hat on his head fell off, and Applejack stomped on it.

"Ah am going to ask you one more time, ya filthy unicorn," Applejack shouted. Her available fore hoof grabbed his mane and yanked him up to stare into her eye. "Tell everypony here how you knew about our attack! Tell us, and Ah'll make this quick on you, an' yur troops."

Luster Mind licked at his blood that had trailed into his mouth, then spat it in her face. Applejack didn't even flinch at this, nor did she stop staring at him when her hoof blade flashed twice.

Pinkie hadn't even seen AJ's hoof move, there was just a glint of steel twice over, then nothing. Then Luster Mind's horn fell off his head, and blood started spilling from a deep cut in his neck.

He fell forward, gasping and gurgling in pain, flinching violently. His horn rolled underneath him, as if to taunt him that it had been severed. As blood flowed down his chest, Psy Coat and Light Barrier averted their eyes, and the audience cheered loudly.

Applejack grunted in annoyance as she stepped away from the dying leader, flicking the blood off her hoof blade. "Next one, then."

When she approached Psy Coat, the unicorn screamed at her. "I will never tell you anything either! Glory to Celestia and Luna! Though I die today, I know one day, you will die by the fires of righteousness!"

Applejack stepped forward, and Pinkie felt her heart hammering inside her chest. The party pony had felt the world had stopped when she saw Applejack murder a pony, so ruthlessly too. Now she was mentally chanting for AJ to stop, to not hurt this unicorn.

"You say righteousness?" Applejack asked Psy Coat.

Before the unicorn could answer, Applejack jammed her hoof blade into Psy's chest. She cried out, ground her teeth to stop from making more noises, and tried to stare down Applejack.

"You are evil monsters," she spat.

"We are tha evil ones?!"

Applejack stabbed deeper into Psy Coat, as the unicorn screamed, unable to hold back. "Who was it," the earth pony commander shouted, "that lied to us all our lies?"

She pulled the hoof blade out, and shanked Psy Coat again. "Who was it that cast away tha other Elements of Harmony, destroying them?"

Another puncture in Psy Coat made the unicorn spit up blood. "Who was it that enslaved our kind, tortured our ponies, and ripped the Cutie Marks frum our flanks?"

Applejack didn't stop stabbing the unicorn, even as Psy Coat's eyes rolled up into her head and sank into the fatal, impalements.

"Who is it that's tearin' apart our world? Who destroyed Ponyville? Who are tha real monsters?!"

Applejack paused for one moment in the midst of her skewering flurry to lop off Psy Coat's horn. She was dead by now, unable to feel the loss her magical appendage. Applejack pulled her hoof blade from the body, and turned to the audience; they were in a combination of giddiness and shock.

"Let it be known here an' now," Applejack, blood splattered all over her, cried out to the pony crowd, "that what we do is because our enemy has no honor, no dignity, an' are tha true monsters of this war!"

The Earthborn audience burst into roaring agreement. Pinkie felt tears stinging her eyes, then run down her face as the audience's approval seemed to echo forever in her head.

Applejack turned back to the prisoners, marching up to Light Barrier. The unicorn had lost a great deal of color in his face, staring at the suspended bodies of his former soldiers. When the earth pony commander forced his head to turn with her hoof blade, he flinched at how much blood was on her face.

"Now, final member of this little patrol," Applejack said. "Tell me what Ah want ta know, an' Ah may make this gentle on you."

Pinkie let out a muffled scream of, "No!" shaking her head back and forth. Applejack gave her a moment's glance, then returned her gaze to Light Barrier.

His eyes kept darting between her and his dead comrades. Seeing them hanging on the ropes, bleeding from fatal wounds. He was picturing himself like that now, and it broke him.

"The… the plan came from…"

He stammered, swallowing nervously as he glanced up at the sun. "Oh, Celestia, forgive me…"

"No mentioning her," Applejack ordered. Her hoof blade left a slender cut on his foreleg. "Now tell me what I want to know."

Wincing at the slice, he breathed deeply as he prepared to talk. With one glance at his dead comrades, he began to say, "We learned that…"

Then he glanced at Pinkie Pie, who was still fighting her bounds. The tears in her eyes, the frantic movements to be freed, it seemed to stop his words. When he spoke again, Applejack had to lean in to hear his whisper.

Then he swung his head up at her, trying to catch her one eye with his horn. It was a clutch shot, but she had been expecting it. Applejack leapt back to avoid the attack, and the horn passed by without harm.

"You know, Ah think you may talk," Applejack said, as she lifted her left foreleg, "after Ah've ripped tha truth out of you."

A hoof blade extended from Applejack's other armor sleeve, and both of her weapons gleamed in the sun. She began slicing and slashing at Light Barrier, the damage not visible at first.

Then Pinkie saw blood on him. Cuts were spreading all over his body, his coat becoming spotted with his life fluid. Applejack was cutting him apart, very slowly and meticulously.

Light Barrier began thrashing in pain. He twisted and writhed against his bonds, gasping and screaming. Pinkie Pie was shrieking against her gag for Applejack to stop, so desperate that she scraped her tongue raw against the rope; her throat was giving out on how hard she was screaming muffled

He felt apart in front of her eyes. His ears were sliced off, bits of his mane and legs were cut away, and then, as blood stained his coat all over, the gashes spread to more fatal areas. His chest and throat were cut open, leaving him gasping hard to breathe.

Applejack stopped her cutting then, and retracted one of her hoof blades with a quarter-inch rotation in the other direction. "Now tell me, unicorn! Tell me and Ah will ease your pain."

Light Barrier raised his head slowly. Blood seemed to cover his face, Pinkie couldn't recognize him in a physical sense anymore. As his life force was escaping from an uncountable number of cuts, he managed to choke out some words.

"M-my parents… wuh-were Shiny Orb and… P-Pearl Drop. I was born in Canterlot… and I fight… for House Moon & Star.

"Although… I always wanted," he said, glancing up at the sun as Applejack raised her hoof blade, "to be a musician instead."

She stabbed him through the throat, then slashed off his horn. He died within seconds of the two attacks, and the audience cheered loudly again. Pinkie collapsed, as much as she could in her restraints.

Applejack again flicked off the blood from her blade, holding it up to the audience as they stamped and shouted their approval. Finally, she walked over to Pinkie Pie.

It was only then that they could truly see each other, and Applejack boggled at her; she wasn't able to hide her own shock, even to the terrified, pink prisoner.

Applejack was much older than her, that was obvious. Pinkie's face was stained with tears, and not the kind of tears she let fly when something emotional was happening, but the true kind that came when there was real pain, real hurting. Pinkie right now wanted to crawl up in a ball and sob for hours.

"Who are you?" Applejack asked.

Pinkie didn't even look at her. The commander growled in frustration, but then realized that Pinkie was still gagged. Trying to hide this blunder of hers, Applejack faced the audience.

"Ah'm sure most of you do not know who this mare is trying to represent," she declared. "After all, most of you were not citizens of Ponyville, an' no pony has seen the alleged leader of tha Cult of Laughter."

Confused murmurs ran through the crowd. Applejack hung her head for a moment; this wasn't going to be easy, even for her, to say.

"This mare, who was found attacking the same outpost as those unicorns, is imitating Pinkie Pie: tha former Element of Laughter, and alleged leader of tha Cult of Laughter!"

Gasps of shock could be heard, and then shouts of outrage. Every pony in the crowd knew full well about the Cult, and every single one of them feared as well as hated the abominations that had followed. Applejack decided to feed that hatred.

"Y'all know what tha Cult of Laughter is capable of. Necromancy, brainwashin', torture, sadistic experiments, and atrocities that make the enemy houses look like child's play, even House Moon & Star!"

She stomped her free foreleg, pointing at Pinkie with her hoof blade. "Is this tha work of tha sadistic Cult? Is it tha work of anothur enemy, tryin' ta undermine our morale? Ah don't know myself, but together, as one, we will force tha truth out o' 'er."

Applejack nodded to one of the guards, and he untied Pinkie Pie's gag. She coughed and spat out the sour saliva in her mouth that had been building up.

"Now," Applejack started, "impostor-"

"You're not Applejack," Pinkie shrieked, startling everypony around her. "The real Applejack doesn't murder ponies! She wouldn't kill her fellow pony! Who are you?"

Applejack blinked. She really had not been expecting this. "Well… it seems you are a member of tha Cult," she said, "or yur average deranged pony."

"I'm not talking to you, Fake AJ! I want out of this game! I want back to last save! Restart! Reload!"

Pinkie struggled at her bonds, including trying to gnaw at the ropes. The guard nearby held her still, as she continued by shouting, "I don't even own a Coltari, but I sure as sugar cookies am not going to buy one now! If you're an example, maybe there is too much violence in games nowadays, Fake AJ!"

Applejack blinked some more. She turned to Apple Fritter and the pony Pinkie didn't recognize, and asked, "Do either of you have any idea what in tarnation she is yammering about?"

They shook their heads, and the commander let out a frustrated sigh. She approached Pinkie again, and lifted her hoof blade at her throat. "Who are you?"

"I'm Pinkie Pie, Fake A-"

"Ah am going to cut out your eye," Applejack hissed, circling the blade around Pinkie's right eye, "if ya keep up this farce. Now tell me, who are you?"

"I am Pinkemena Diane Pie, a.k.a Pinkie Pie," she exclaimed defiantly. "You want proof, Fake AJ? You're Applejack of Sweet Apple Acres! You have a big brother named Big Macintosh, and a little sister named Apple Bloom who is desperately trying to get her Cutie Mark with her friends Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo!

"You lost your parents when you were little, and you've been running the farm ever since! You once tried to harvest all the apples yourself, you were so stubborn; you even gave me baked bads when you were punch-drunk loopy!

"That's your cousin over there, Apple Fritter," Pinkie carried on, a small head nod towards the green-maned pony; Fritter blinked at being addressed. "She lives in Ponyville too! She's a little sweet on Cloud Kicker, even though she really hopes that Blossomforth will grow some guts and admit her true feelings for Kicker!"

Fritter gasped in shock, covering her mouth with her hoof. Applejack glanced between her and Pinkie Pie, also confused, her mouth hung open slightly.

"And speaking of love lives," Pinkie exclaimed, looking back at Applejack, "even if you're Fake AJ, you would know that Big Mac was dating Cheerilee!

"And you! You, my fake impostor murderer, you had a crush! You had a crush on a certain somepony that we all knew about, but you didn't-"

Applejack punched Pinkie Pie across the face. It was the hardest blow Pinkie had ever received, it left her mind reeling and dazed. A couple teeth had been knocked out, she tasted blood in her mouth.

And the Supreme Commander didn't stop there. With her hoof blades retracted, she decked Pinkie, over and over again, slugging her in the face, the chest, the head. Pinkie could only feel pain, and yet, the worst part of the pain was that it was somepony resembling Applejack that was doing this to her.

Applejack finally stopped when Apple Fritter pulled her back. Pinkie slumped as much as she could when tied up like she was. Teeth and blood filled her mouth, and she spat them out; she had no idea how many she lost, she couldn't even see properly, or even count.

Her chest and face felt like somepony had taken a sledgehammer to them, and the throbbing agony was making her shiver. As she ran her tongue against her teeth, trying to guess how many she had lost, Apple Fritter was desperately trying to calm Applejack.

"Stop this, Supreme Commander, yur gonna kill 'er," Apple Fritter shouted, pushing her leader back.

Applejack fought against her, until eventually, she collected herself. Breathing heavily, she glanced at the audience. All of the ponies were staring in shock and confusion, not entertainment like it had been for the unicorns. This was not a good position for her, but she knew how to recover from this.

"House Earthborn, subjects and soldiers," she shouted out as she walked to center stage, "Ah am sorry, but Ah lost mah composure there. Because this mare, this awful being has fully convinced me that she is a diabolical impostor, a wicked attempt to undermine mah confidence.

"We know what happened," she continued, "on that fateful day when Twilight Sparkle messed with magic she never should have set hoof and horn on. And so, she, or the Cult, or sum' other force has decided to make a mock representation of a friend of mine, a good pony!

"But Ah am not so easily tricked!"

She unsheathed her hoof blade, and approached Pinkie Pie. "Because Ah know that this is some kind of sick joke, and only a sick joke find this funny!"

Applejack lifted her foreleg. Pinkie Pie stared at her, pain and confusion evident in her eyes. The Supreme Commander didn't hear Apple Fritter call out to her, pleading with her to wait.

A flash of steel, and suddenly Pinkie Pie felt a kind of suffering like she never could imagine. Her left forearm felt like it was on white-hot fire, and she screamed, once. Panting hard, she glanced to see how bad it was.

Her foreleg was dangling on the post that had been holding her up. Pinkie stared at it, unable to fathom what she was seeing, even as blood ran down the stump on her side. She started to black out, breathing hard to endure the terrible pain.

Then a strange goo was applied to the critical wound. It stung worse than a thousand bees, burning against the bleeding stump. She shrieked in agony, as it felt like acid eating away at her. Pinkie collapsed against the post she was still tied to, sobbing uncontrollably.

A guard pony near her, holding a jar of the green salve, applied it generously to the awful wound. It was helping to heal the amputation, but, like most medicine, stung when applied. The bleeding stopped, and the nerve endings stopped sending intense messages of pain to the brain; however, the feedback of the salve, as it were, was almost as great as the injury.

"Twice as good as cauterizing, our healing salve," Applejack noted, with a sneer. "Ya wouldn't believe how long we've worked on this, a natural solution of first-aid ta beat those bastard unicorns. Actually, we shouldn't be wasting this precious salve on ya, but Ah wouldn't want ya ta die too soon; Ah still have questions fer ya."

"Supreme Commander Applejack," Fritter exclaimed, approaching her leader, "please! This isn't right!"

"You want mercy fer this impostor?" Applejack asked her, her eye not leaving Pinkie. "She is an evil tool."

"She saved tha life of mah soldiers, and mahself! Why would an enemy agent save us, then be captured?"

"Because she wanted ta see me."

The commander glanced at the amputated, pink foreleg. "This way, Ah would have to see her face-to-face. Whoever did this wants me to falter. Apple Fritter, you know just as well as Ah do, this isn't Pinkie."

"It isn't The Laughing Mare either," Apple Fritter said, narrowing her eyes, "or any Cultist. They are a crazed bunch of lunatics, not like that!"

She approached Pinkie Pie, who was shaking in agony, sobbing, looking close to either fainting or throwing up. "So then, what have you ta say 'bout that, "Pinkie Pie"?"

Pinkie's mind was a spinning mess, all the emotions in the world trying to dominate. Anyone who knew Pinkie knew that she, in her darkest hours, would subvert to being as goofy as possible to hide the pain she was going through.

Whether it was the frustration of babysitting two rowdy twins, under the impression her friends hated her parties, fear of being sent into a magical pool by accident, terror of dangling on the side of a cliff by a single branch with a unicorn hanging onto her legs, or believing she had ruined her sister's band, Pinkie Pie would always be Pinkie Pie.

1.) "I always knew you had a disarming disposition, Pinkie Pie!"

2.) "You said you were going to take out my eye! Bait and switch doesn't suit you, AJ!"

3.) Quote it. You know you want to.

"This is," Pinkie managed to choke out, glancing between her amputated arm and Applejack. She gagged, coughed, and then managed the smallest of smiles. "Tis' but a scratch!"

Applejack's good eye twitched, and she pointed her hoof blade at her. "Cultist! Foul, disgusting monster! Ah am going to take you apart piece by piece!"

"No, wait," Apple Fritter pleaded. The other pony held her back, and she shouted, "General Tree Branch, let me go!"

"House Earthborn," Applejack shouted to the audience, "we are going to dispose of tha sick cultist who has infiltrated us today! If tha Cult of Laughter finds pain so funny, let's see if they find their own amputations humorous!"

"Only a flesh wound," Pinkie babbled, eyes rolling around in her head, unfocused and loopy. Her pain, even if it was subsiding, was making her delirious. She giggled in her unbalanced state.

"If you think it's so funny," she advanced on Pinkie while saying, "then let's see how much ya like more of it!"

Pinkie hiccuped, and her delirium faded when she saw the one-eyed, furious version of her close friend advancing on her. "No, Applejack," she whimpered, humor gone and replaced with shock. "No, don't do it!"

Applejack pointed at Pinkie Pie's left hind leg, and lifted her killer blade. The audience let out cheers of anticipation.

"AJ, don't do this!"

"Begging now?" Applejack spat out with a smirk. "Ah knew cultists can be schizophrenic, but not so quickly-"

"Don't let yourself do this!!"

The air seemed to split from her desperate cry, causing Applejack to flinch. Pinkie swung her remaining foreleg at her. The wooden post it was tied to cracked in half, and the rope split at the strands. Pinkie's hoof whacked Applejack in the side of the head, sending the Supreme Commander sprawling across the stage.

As Pinkie stumbled back, Apple Fritter and Tree Branch helped Applejack up. Before any of them, the guards, or the audience could react, the sound of whipping wind could be heard above them.

One guard, the one that had been suppressing Pinkie when she was struggling, glanced upward. A spear imbedded into his eye, cutting all the way into the brain. The pegasus yanked out her weapon from the dead pony-at-arms, and spun it around.

"Go for the generals," Scootaloo shouted, as more pegasi came darting down. "Eliminate the enemy leaders!

"FOR HOUSE STORMWING!"

"Pegasi attack," Apple Fritter shouted. "House Earthborn, defensive positions!"

Loud horns sounded off nearby and up in the sky, belonging to both Earthborn and Stormwing. Earth ponies, the ones armored, leapt to action as the unarmed earth ponies fled back to the city.

"Air raid," Applejack shouted. "House Earthborn, stand yur ground an' bring them down!"

One of the pegasus hoplites dive-bombed at the leader of Earthborn. She received a vicious bucking from Apple Fritter, knocking her to the other side of the platform. Pinkie Pie scrambled away from the pegasus, who struggled back to her hooves.

All around them, pegasi were attacking earth ponies, and winning. The earth ponies swung and bucked at the flying attackers, but they were too agile to be struck. Ponies-at-arms were being slain, being stabbed in vital areas that their armor didn't protect.

Applejack glanced all over the now-battlefield, and settled on Pinkie Pie. "Stop her," she shouted. "Do not let that impostor get away!"

Scootaloo, who had killed another Earthborn trooper as Applejack shouted, glanced over at where the leader was pointing. The Wind Captain's eyes widened as she saw the pink mare. "Wha… what? Is that-"

A mass of brown feathers and armor landed on the platform, splintering the wood. The gryphon raised her head as she stared down Applejack and the two generals. It let out a feral snarl, and leapt at the supreme commander.

General Tree Branch intercepted the attack, deflecting the gryphon's steel-like talons with his own hoof blade. Even with its size and strength, the gryphon was being parried swing for swing by the Earthborn General. The battle continued as Apple Fritter hurried Applejack away, keeping her leader safe.

The pegasus hoplite had recovered from the bucking, and was now staring down Pinkie Pie. As the Stormwing warrior started to bear down on the three-legged pony, Pinkie felt mortal fear nearly paralyze her body.

"No no," she cried out, "stay away from me!"

"I don't know why they're executing you," the hoplite said, holding up her spear, "but let me finish that job, earth pony."

Pinkie had reached the edge of the platform, fearing to fall off. Her eyes narrowed on that spear, the steel gleaming wickedly, the wooden pole secure in the pegasus's hooves.

Wait…

Pinkie Pie reached into her mane, and pulled out what looked like a shoulder-mounted party cannon. The pink metal had a particular luster that was blinding even without the sun shining on it. It was large enough, but just barely, for a pony to squeeze in there. Pinkie had her remaining foreleg on what looked like a trigger.

"You wanna use a pointed stick? Say hello," Pinkie exclaimed, "to my little, anti-pointed stick device!"

"The hay?!" the pegasus shouted, freezing where she stood.

Two Earthborn soldiers, who were defending the platform, noticed this. "What in Tartarus," one of them declared. "You told me you frisked her before we arrested her! How did you miss that?"

"Miss that? How in Tartarus did she store that anywhere on her?!"

Applejack saw it from far off. Her eye widened, jaw dropping. Even with Apple Fritter and her soldiers helping her away to safety, she could see this.

"No," Applejack thought. "No, no pony could pull something… that thing… out of nowhere… except… NO!"

"Stand back," Pinkie half-shouted, half-begged. "I'm warning you, I turned up the Pinkie Pie Bazooka to the max, and if I have to shoot you, I will!"

The pegasus hoplite hesitated, then scoffed. "Yeah, right, you couldn't have any ammo in that thing if you stored it in your mane! Nice bluff!"

With a flap of her wings, the pegasus launched herself at Pinkie, and unknown to both of them, a second pegasus was dive-bombing the pink mare from the side, hoping to catch the pink mare in a side attack. Pinkie squeezed the trigger.

And a plushie imitation of Pinkie flew out of the bazooka.

The fake Pinkie Pie impacted with the pegasus hoplite, exploding into confetti, balloons, and other random party decorations. The real Pinkie was catapulted backwards, off the platform and crashing against the riverbank. The second pegasus attacking her crashed into the platform, unable to stop when his target had rocketed away.

The pegasus hoplite blasted by the bazooka's unusual round was sent skidding across the platform, dazed out of her mind. She couldn't even tell what way the sky was after a hit like that.

As the horns that echoed with the explosion sound died down, Pinkie Pie tried to sit up. "Oh Celestia, what a launch… my anti-pointed stick device is more powerful than I remember… that's good bazooka…"

She struggled on three hooves, but before she could assemble herself, she was yanked upwards and into the air. Pinkie's bazooka vanished when its owner was taken away.

The pink mare was lifted skyward, the speed of which she was being carried giving her a touch of vertigo. When her kidnapper stopped the ascension, she was slammed against a tight-packed cloud, thick enough to support an earth pony.

"Oh, no more," Pinkie cried out as the impact jarred her. "Stop! Please, whoever you… are…"

Pinkie Pie found herself staring at another of her friends with only one good eye. Rainbow Dash, dressed in shining armor, was squinting hard at Pinkie with both eyes, though the red orb that was a mass of scars was twitching uncontrollably.

"D-Dashie?" Pinkie exclaimed in surprise. The claw scars over Dash's left eye was just as horrifying as the burn-scarred side of her pegasus friend's face. She glanced down that horrible side, which disappeared into her chest armor, highlighted with a lightning bolt emblem.

The wind blew around them, the frigid air ruffling the crest of Rainbow's helmet and her prismatic tail and mane. Her jaw had dropped, and the hoof holding her spear quivered.

"No," Rainbow Dash said, shaking as she stared at Pinkie Pie. "No, you can't be-"

"It's me, Dashie!"

"NO!!"

Rainbow screamed at the top of her lungs, jumping away from Pinkie. Her expression went from incredulous shock to primal outrage. With a furious war cry, she flew back at Pinkie, spear at the ready.

Pinkie tried to stop the attack, which wasn't easy on her back. Her stump wiggled as she tried to lift the foreleg that wasn't there anymore. Thus, she only managed to smack the spear upwards with her other foreleg.

It wasn't a fast enough parry.

Pinkie felt an intense pain up across her face, and blood splashed her. Her vision went blurry, then narrowed. She couldn't see through her left eye.

Her face was bleeding so badly, her mind started to chant, "Gonna die, gonna die!" She tried to crawl away on the cloud, as Rainbow Dash landed on it. "Gonna die!"

"Get back here," Dash screamed, spit flying from her mouth in her outrage. She charged at Pinkie across the cloud.

"Dashie is trying to kill me! DASHIE IS TRYING TO KILL ME!"

With a mighty push, Pinkie heaved herself off the cloud and down towards the earth. She saw the sky above her as she fell, Rainbow Dash chasing after her. Her own blood leaving a tiny trail, falling down after her facial wound.

The fall would have been fatal or incapacitating at the height Rainbow Dash had taken her, but she landed in the river. Pinkie was almost knocked out from the impact, but the cool water seemed to wake her up too. She saw a spear head stabbing into the water, but missed as Pinkie paddled down deeper into the river.

Pinkie allowed the current take her away, the water stained with her blood. She held her breath for as long as she could, which was a rather long time; it was one of those things that baffled her friends, how Pinkie could hold her breath for an unordinary amount of time.

When she submerged, Rainbow Dash was nowhere in sight. She was far away from the platform where she lost her foreleg. The earth ponies and pegasi were still fighting and killing each other. Even though it was far away, Pinkie saw two earth pony guards beating to death somepony on the platform; it was probably the one she had hit with the Pinkie Pie Bazooka.

"I let another pony die in my place."

That realization was enough for her to lose consciousness. She floated on her back down the river, carried away from the violence and death, or at least just this battle.


House Stormwing retreated with a blast of their war horn, gone as fast as they had come. Three of their warriors were dead, which was disastrous, even compared to the twenty-one dead Earthborn soldiers.

Applejack, Tree Branch, and Apple Fritter had retreated to Hoof Down Tower, where the guards all set up a secure defense in case of a second attack; Stormwing was known for psyching out their enemies, tricking them into letting down their defenses and then flying back down for another strike attack.

Rainbow Dash and her soldiers had flown off. When Scootaloo tried to talk to her leader, all Dash would say was, "It couldn't have been her, it couldn't have. What in feathering Tartarus is going on today?!"

Applejack was saying something similar, punching a table as she cursed her frustrations. Apple Fritter tried to calm her down, even though she was in as much turmoil as her leader.

"That had to have been a cultist," Applejack tried to reason. "There's no other reason! That's why she was flip-flopping emotionally!"

"But," Apple Fritter stammered, "when she was begging ya ta stop… it didn't seem like that."

"There's nothing else it could 'ave been, Fritter," her commander shouted. "Ponies only beg you ta stop hurting them because they don't want ya ta hurt them anymore!"

As Applejack stormed off, cursing, Apple Fritter sat down on her flank, staring at the floor. "Unless," she thought to herself, "it was not because she didn't want you ta stop hurting her… it was that she didn't want ta see you doing it."


Pinkie was still drifting down Shattered Care River on her back, the left side of her face submerged in the water. Her face had stopped bleeding, and the cut had, though lightly, sealed up. Her eye was a white orb with a thin scar across it, pupil gone.

Shattered Care River, most ponies did not know, shared a connection with the Everfree Forest. The natural remedies, powered by Lady Fluttershy to keep her troops healthy and strong, were coursing through the river. It was like a healing potion being poured into the waters, causing a light healing effect over time.

Though this caused two beings to be rather aware of Pinkie's presence. Lady Fluttershy, who had finished talking to the Everfree Liege, could sense what was floating in the river that had been named after her own actions.

"No," Fluttershy hissed, glaring down at the floor. "No, it must be something else! There's no way it's her!"

The other being to sense Pinkie was Starswirl the Bearded. The ghost of the great unicorn sensed the magical, lingering touches from the earth pony, as if they were fireworks during a pitch black night.

"Egad," he exclaimed, bringing Twilight Sparkle's attention to him. "Gadzooks! Methinks the impossible hath happened!"

"What?" Twilight asked. "What has you so riled, Starswirl?"

"Thou would think I wood, but… belike, the Astral Plane has brought us a visitor hither."

"What?!"

The Archmagister practically galloped to where the ghost was being held. "Starswirl, you mean to tell me a being from the Astral Plane has come here? To Equestria?"

"Nay, not a being that lives in the Astral Plane; the sensing would be much stronger. It is somedeal waning, like something touched by my plane."

"How is this possible?"

"I must inform thee, I have no idea. But, this magic touch has been amplified by the magic of Shattered Care River, making it like a neon sign powering up enow for me to sense."

"I must learn more about this visitor!"

Twilight Sparkle sat down, and magic began to hum around her horn. It grew, more and more powerful, until the magic glow itself was larger than Twilight.

"Careful, do not overdo the spell, Twilight," Starswirl cautioned her.

"I am fine, Starswirl… let me hunt for our Astral Plane guest in silence, I need to focus… this could be the key to everything!"

She continued to channel her spell, hunting for that touch of Astral Plane imprint. Her mind was now a powerful eye across Equestria, peering and staring, hurrying towards Shattered Care River. She began at the start, at Dragonpoint Mountain, where the waters first started flowing.

Scanning down the river, she began her hunt. Twilight focused with all her mind and heart, part of her allowing hope to rise. Thoughts of Celestia and Luna filled her mind, and she wondered, briefly, if this would help her find the princesses.


For a couple hours, Pinkie floated down that river. She drifted into a wooded area she wouldn't have known, called Springtime Forest, and then was washed onto the muddy shore. There she lay, barely breathing, her damaged body splayed like if she was a casualty of war.

As she was unconscious, no pony knows how long she laid there. She was only discovered when a young foal wandered over to the river bank, hoping to find some frogs.

"Doop-dee-doo," he hummed to himself. He was so absorbed in his own song he was making, he didn't noticed Pinkie Pie until he tripped over her.

When he saw the pink mare, he mistook her for a dead body, and screamed. His shrill cries of horror brought several ponies over.

"What's going on?" one adult pony asked. "Is he okay?"

"Stop the boy from screaming," another pony exclaimed. "The diamond dogs will hear!"

"Is that pony dead?"

"Oh dear, I think she is!"

"Wait… is she pink, with a pink mane?"

The ponies, foals and adults, nervously trotted towards Pinkie. When she moaned in her unconscious state, the ponies freaked out.

"Is that one of the undead ponies?"

"Oh no no no, they wouldn't invade here, would they?"

"I'm sorry, mommy! I just wanted to catch frogs!"

As the ponies fretted, some of them running away, one pony swerved through the crowd. "Move," she barked. "Move! Every second counts, ponies!"

She approached the pink mare, her horn glowing with mint-green magic. "There's a pulse," she stated, squatting down next to Pinkie. "She's still alive, but barely. This poor thing… what in Tartarus did she go through?"

"Are you out of your mind?" one of the ponies shouted. There were still a great deal of ponies nearby, some armed with tools and whatever they could get their hooves on. "Do you see who that could possibly be?"

"Excuse me?" the unicorn snapped, narrowing her golden eyes at the pony. "What are you saying?"

"Pink mane, pink coat, mangled body, undead like," the pony listed. She was shaking in fear when she shouted, "That's… that's possibly one of the cultists! It looks like Pinkie Pie!"

"Pinkie Pie?" several ponies exclaimed at once. They clung to each other, or held their tools up like weapons.

"No no no," one pony shouted hysterically. "She came here? The Laughing Mare?!"

"The Cult wouldn't come all the way here, would they?" the young boy asked, clinging to his mother. "Are we in danger?"

"We need to kill it!" A stallion raised a shovel, declaring, "We do it, or the diamond dogs!"

"Everypony calm down," the unicorn near Pinkie barked at the crowd. They did settle down, slightly, and watched as she leaned over the pink pony's body. Her mint green hooves inspected Pinkie, checking out the stump, the slash mark on her face that was poorly healed, and then, her Cutie Mark.

"Balloons," she said to herself, "two baby blue, one yellow." She inspected Pinkie's one good eye. "Blue… the hair… is this… but… what…"

"Hey, Lyra!"

The mint unicorn looked up at the crowd of ponies, who were advancing on her. One in particular dared to trot a little closer. "What are you doing?" Berry Punch asked. "Get away from it! It could be undead or something!"

"No, she's alive," Lyra said. She glanced between her friend and Pinkie. "Please help me out, I need to get her to the emergency room."

"Are you crazy?! Lyra, you know what could happen!"

"Berry, please calm down, you're upsetting the others."

"Yeah, I'm damn right to! A representation of Pinkie Pie shows up, and you want us to bring her into the village? You're crazy!"

"When have I steered you wrong?" Lyra shouted. "Now please! Somepony? Anypony? I need help, I don't want to carry her alone!"

No pony stepped forward. All of them were staring at Lyra, wondering if she had lost her mind. Another pony stepped forward, staring at the unconscious, pink mare.

"Lyra," Colgate said, "we know you are intent on saving others, and bless you for that, but-"

"Please! If I don't get her out of here, she is going to die!"

Berry Punch exchanged nervous glances with Colgate. "Maybe," the blue unicorn said, staring down at the ground, a mixture of guilt and fear in her voice, "it would be best if she did. It could be a blessing to go out without much pain."

Lyra stared back at them, desperate anxiety raising in her. Pinkie let out a feeble moan, as if pleading for help. "Everypony," Lyra called out, "please don't do this! Berry! Colgate? …Bonbon!"

The pale yellow pony trotted through the crowd, coming closer than any of them. She had heard the news when ponies had retreated back to the village, and when she first looked for Lyra, she realized she would be where the injured pony would be.

Though when Bonbon saw Pinkie Pie, she recoiled. "Oh no," she exclaimed. "No no no! Lyra, you cannot be serious!"

"She's going to die!"

"Do you have any idea who or what she could be?"

"She's a dying pony, I know that! What?" she snapped, glaring Bonbon then at the others. "You all think The Laughing Mare is out to attack our town?"

"With all that's happened-"

"Bonbon, I am begging you! Please, I don't believe she's evil!"

Lyra placed one of her hooves over her heart, as if to protect it when she asked, "Don't you trust me?"

Bonbon stared at her for a few seconds. She glanced at the other ponies, some shaking their heads at her. After a few seconds of contemplation on her part, which felt like hours to everypony else, she let out a long sigh.

"With how you've trusted me over all these years," she said, trotting over to Lyra, "I would be a hypocrite not to return it."

Lyra used her magic to hoist Pinkie Pie on Bonbon's back. As they started to walk towards town, the mint-colored unicorn gave her earth pony lover on the cheek. "Thank you."

"This is a mistake," one of the ponies said. She stepped forward, pointing at Lyra. "If anything happens because you brought her in-"

"I will take full consequences."

"Don't forget we have children here! If one so much as gets hurt-"

"Marigold, calm down," Colgate snapped, coming face-to-face with the angry mare. "Lyra has accepted the responsibility. I think you are forgetting how much she has done for us."

This temporarily silenced the mare, and most of the others stared down in shame. Colgate trotted over to Lyra and Bonbon, saying, "If they are going to risk it, then we should have faith in them."

"Hey wait," Berry exclaimed. "A minute ago, you were entirely against this!"

"I am entitled to change my mind," Colgate replied, a slight smile on her face as she walked away with Lyra and Bonbon. "All or nothing, that's what I've always said."

Berry and the others watched them go head back to the town. The magenta earth pony stared for a while, and let out a sigh. "Aw, buck me and my conscience," she muttered to herself before trotting after them.


(In Pinkie Pie's home universe…)

"I do not understand, Sister!"

Princess Luna stomped her hoof in frustration, glaring at the Astral Screen. "Surely, detecting Pinkie Pie should be easy around the universes! How could there be more than one in this many universes?"

"I'm afraid a magical scan for multiple Pinkie Pies is futile," Princess Celestia said with remorse. "This subject has cloned herself with the Miracle Pool, which makes that kind of scan obsolete."

"You mean Pinkie Pie cloned herself in almost every alternate universe?" Twilight asked, her voice falling with the realization.

Celestia was many centuries old, but she was not immune to a pony's suffering. Hearing her favorite student's hope fall and crash, so evident in her voice, was making it hard for the princess to focus.

"I am afraid so, Twilight Sparkle," she said with a sad nod. "Luna, please keep trying to scan the alternate universes, see if you can isolate the Miracle Pool and eliminate it from the scanning. I'll try to narrow down the search to just two, if the spell can be crafted to such a way."

Princess Luna's black magic swirled around her horn. To a magically talented mind like Twilight, the editing and crafting of a spell was evident, even if it was so complicated that Twilight was completely in the dark.

"Has thou never attempted to edit this spell before, sister?" Luna asked.

"No, I considered myself lucky that I could even scan through infinite universes; to complicate a spell that took me so long seemed frivolous. Until now."

Luna nodded, then focused on her magic again. She could practically feel a pair of purple eyes scanning her as she worked. "Staring at me isn't going to make it go by faster, Twilight Sparkle."

"I know, I'm sorry. Just… is there anything I can do to help?"

Celestia answered this. "I'm sorry, Twilight, but again, this spell is incredibly complex. I would rather scan as much as I could, just in case your friend has arrived in a dangerous, alternate reality."

"Is… is that common?"

Again, the princess felt a slight stab at her heart over Twilight's distress. She sighed, and decided to be blunt with her. "From what I have seen, a great deal of our universes are safe, Twilight. The worst a pony would have to deal with there are the turmoils of everyday in Equestria; Pinkie's worst problem there would be ponies confused why there are two of her.

"However, there are some universes that are exceptionally dangerous. Which is why I need to focus."

Twilight opened her mouth, then closed it. Celestia realized her student wanted an example, as the lavender unicorn usually was not satisfied until she could fully grasp a situation.

"Imagine," Celestia spoke, "a world where I am a cruel, evil leader like King Sombra was. Or just imagine one where Sombra succeeded, and spread his hateful magic across all of Equestria. There are places out there where evil reigns, and thus, I want to find to Pinkie as fast as possible."

Twilight nodded, bowing to her princess. "I understand. I'll go talk to my friends, try to calm them down."

"Try to keep yourself calm too, Twilight Sparkle." The princess managed a positive smile, and added, "Luna and I are both on this."

Twilight managed to smile back, then left the room. When she was out of earshot, Luna glimpsed at her sister.

"You have not told her about the subject known as Pinkie Pie's biggest problem that you have discovered?" she asked. "Surely, that would be the greatest predicament we are facing."

"It seemed unnecessary to tell her what her friend is not here. I only pray she never finds out about that malady."

"For what Pinkie Pie has done in other universes, she has been dealt with by the alternate versions of us. If she wound up there, not only would our scan not pick up two Pinkies because-"

"I know that, Luna, but this is already too complicated!"

Celestia's words came out harsher than she meant. She sighed, and said, "The complications have all come to mind. I know how big of a problem I have created, reminding me isn't going to help my focus in fixing it."

In the hallway, Rainbow Dash was pacing a great deal, with Rarity pleading with her to stop. Fluttershy stared at the carpet, with Applejack trying to comfort her. When Twilight came out, they all looked at her in anticipation; the hope fell when she shook her head.

"Sugarcube," Applejack spoke up when Twilight Sparkle sat next to her, "Ah have to know. What exactly are they doing?"

"They're using a magic scan that will see if there are more than one Pinkie Pie in an alternate universe."

"You mean ta tell me the sisters' have enough power to search a whole world?"

"It requires a great deal of magic, so intense that only someone as strong as them could do it," Twilight said.

"Well that makes sense," Rarity spoke up. "I mean, they lift the sun and the moon, I can picture them being able to scan the world in search of a pony."

"The way the scan works," Twilight continued, "it is searching for a pony's soul… think of it like looking through a library, searching all the books, and trying to find two of the same copy."

"Ah ain't much of a reader like you, but Ah got it," Applejack said. "So they're looking for a universe with two of Pinkie's soul?"

"Yes, and no. Remember the Miracle Pool incident, when Pinkie cloned herself?"

"Hard ta remember a thousand Pinkie Pies bouncing around squawkin', "Fun! Fun! Fun," sugar."

"Well, Pinkie didn't lose her soul or anything like that to the Miracle Pool, but the way the magic works is that it magically makes a copy of somepony's soul. The problem with the pool is that it doesn't have the magic potential to, and there's nothing in this world that can, make a proper copy of a pony's soul."

"Is that why," Fluttershy asked, "the clones were pale imitations of Pinkie?"

Twilight nodded, as Applejack struggled to follow this as best she could. "So basically, tha magic scan tha princesses are using cannot tell the difference between this copy the Miracle Pool has stored innit, an' a real Pinkie Pie?"

"It's a very delicate scanning spell that Celestia is still learning, which tells you how complicated it is. Scanning an area for somepony is incredibly complex and intricate.

"If I tried to do a scan for a pony in, say, Ponyville, it could take me an entire day of non-stop focus. Twenty-four straight hours, or more, to scan Ponyville. And even then, I might not find them."

"Why not?"

"Because as strong as the soul of a living being is, it takes the strongest magic to discover its presence. The scan would work much better if your target was tagged or marked with something magical."

"Can't the princesses do somethin' like that?"

Twilight nodded, staring hopefully at the doors to the alternate universe study room. "Celestia told me that Pinkie may have traveled through the Astral Plane, and thus may have lingering, magical touches from such a journey. With that, they should be able to find her."


"I think I found her."

Archmagister Twilight Sparkle opened her eyes, which were glowing with such intense magic that it illuminated the room. She grinned as the magic around her horn, now considerably bigger than her, flashed several times.

"Aha! Yes! Here she is! The markings are still on her! The river's amplification is still there!"

Starswirl the Bearded stroked his facial hair, watching her. "Prithee, what doth thou plan to do?"

"I have studied how to scan a pony's mind to. I will mentally interrogate her for answers once my magic focuses on her mind."

"Will that not be dangerous?"

Twilight shrugged. "For her, maybe."

"What? Why doth thou not care for the safety of this Astral Plane guest? Thou puissant magic could split her mind in twain!"

Sighing regrettably, she muttered, "I know, I know. You are right, Starswirl, I will be careful."

Twilight strained hard, her magic making loud crackling and popping noises. It felt like her mind was being squeezed, like if she was physically trying to stuff herself into a box far too small for her. She struggled, fighting mental inch by inch.

It was at this point that the box, if it were made of cardboard, would have broken from such a powerful force pushing it out from the inside. Twilight wasn't aware, at first, of the great pain she was causing the pony she was scanning.

"No, damn it," she cursed. "Stay still! I don't have much time!"

"Thou cause her teen. Peradventure thou will slow down?"

"I'm trying, but I'm running out of the time! Without her being in the river, the amplification that allows me to reach her this far is fading fast!"

Starswirl could sense those touches, and thus could feel how hard Twilight was trying to get into the subject's head. Many, many miles away, Pinkie Pie was thrashing around in pain.

"Bonbon, help restrain her," Lyra shouted, keeping any trace of panic out of her voice as her patient appeared to be having some kind of seizure.

Twilight forced herself as hard as she could, and then felt her mind enter inside the subject's. It felt like wearing a jacket that was a couple sizes too large, but the unicorn didn't stop at this.

[Who are you?] she asked. The words echoed around Pinkie's head, reverberating so strongly that her voice came out garbled and slow. When Twilight repeated the question, louder, Pinkie experienced somepony shouting in her brain; it was like somepony shrieking right in her ear, ten times worse.

Bonbon was trying to hold Pinkie down, a little easier than normal considering she had three limbs. The pink mare's shout distracted her, almost allowing her to struggle free.

"Head," the delirious Pinkie shouted. "In… my head!"

[I need to know who you are,] Twilight insisted. [Now tell me. Do not make me forcefully search, it could be bad for you.]

Pinkie tried to grab her head, to make the voice that she somewhat recognized stop talking. Lyra pulled her foreleg down, trying to stop her from injuring herself.

[I am warning you, I cannot tell where you are, and thus this is necessary,] Twilight continued to telepathically speak. [I was barely able to follow your astral touches from the river, but where you are is beyond my powers. Please help me, I wish to know more about the Astral Plane.]

"No," Pinkie shouted, struggling against Lyra and Bonbon. "Stop! It's hurting my head!"

"We're trying to help," Bonbon snapped at her.

Twilight sighed, which sounded like a hurricane gust in Pinkie's head. [Okay, I'm trying to be social here, but I want to know. Who are you? Tell me!]

Pinkie was trying to remember where she heard the voice before, then her eyes widened in horror. Her mind raced. "Is that… no! No! Not you too! Augh! Meanie fakey! Go away!"

[Don't be like that, now.]

"The astral touchings' amplifications are nigh gone," Starswirl warned her. "Thou wilt lose thy connection."

Twilight ground her teeth. [I tried to play nice, but I can seriously do some harm when you have these amplified touchings still on you. You may not understand magic like I do, but I think you'll agree that something trying to force its way into your mind sounds rather painful, don't you?

[Now TELL ME!]

Twilight amped up her power, and the effect on Pinkie was terrible. Her facial wound reopened from the strain her body was going through, and Lyra desperately tried to hold her still. Blood was spilling down Pinkie's face.

Pinkie shrieked. She could feel her left eyeball splitting open, slowly.

[I need to know! Who are you?! Why are you here?]

The pink mare collapsed on the table she was being restrained on. She panted hard, and then sobbed bitterly.

"I'm," she choked out, "I'm Pinkie. Pinkie Pie. Pinkamena Diane Pie. Pinkster. Pinkalicious.

"Just… stop… hurting me…"

Twilight Sparkle, for the first time in a very long time, was shocked beyond senses. So profound was her amazement, she lost her focus on the complicated magic she was maintaining.

The spell snuffed out like a candle hit by a bucket of water. The glow around her horn and in her eyes vanished completely. She sat there, listening to what had been said echoing in her mind.

"Alas, the astral touchings," Starswirl lamented, "have faded too much for thee to grasp. Did thou obtain any information?"

Twilight didn't answer at first. She continued to stare forward, as if the wall on the other side of her study was fascinating. After a minute, she managed to shake off her shock.

"I think," she said, "that the impossible has happened… either that, or I'm confused. And I don't like being confused."

Starswirl raised an eyebrow. "The impossible? Belike, this shalt be verily interesting."


Pinkie Pie hadn't remembered when she passed out after the assault on her mind. It felt like her mind was burning, something trying to claw its way and burst out of her skull, then it was gone instantly.

When she awakened, her body was sore all over. Dull throbs were resonating throughout her body, and her mind still hummed as if suffering feedback from a wicked shout into her ear. Even her mouth felt like awful, like she had been chewing on rocks.

Straining to sit up, she managed to do so only after a few minutes of willing her body to move. When it did, she mentally compared herself to a metal spoon being bent back into the shape: it didn't feel right, and felt weaker as a result.

Pinkie shook her head, groaning at the horrible headache. "What in the name of Celestia, Luna," she muttered, "sugar and spice did I do last night?"

"No no no, don't sit up!"

Pinkie saw then a mint-colored unicorn hurrying over to her side. After staring as hard as she could through slightly blurry vision, her peering squint widened enough to make her eyebrows disappear into her mane.

"Lyra?" she asked, letting hope show in her voice.

"Please, don't get up!" Lyra insisted. "You could-"

"LYRA!"

Pinkie Pie was still Pinkie. She, despite being terribly injured, sore as Tartarus, and exhausted, had launched herself off the small cot and onto her friend. The hug last for a couple seconds, before Pinkie burst into tears.

"What's happened?" she whimpered. "What's going on? What kind of game is this? What… what…"

Pinkie stopped this as it dawned on her that she only had one foreleg wrapped around Lyra. She glanced down at herself, and saw her left foreleg was wrapped up and tucked into a sling.

"Oh, my arm grew back," she stated, then smiled at Lyra. "I knew it wouldn't stay away forever, having one arm would make the adventure too hard!"

Lyra blinked in confusion, then shook her head. "Pinkie, sweetheart, at least sit down. You're scaring me."

"I'm scaring you?" Pinkie balked. "Do you want to know what I've seen since I got here? I was attacked multiple times, and then… wait a minute…

"MY ARM IS BACK?! WAHOOOO!!"

Pinkie's shriek woke Bonbon, who had been napping on the sofa in the adjacent room. She hurried in to see what the commotion was, to see Pinkie staring down at herself with the utmost incredulousness.

"It's a little complicated to explain," Lyra said, "but let me try: it's a bio-prosthetic limb. You attach it to a missing limb, and after using some powerful restomancy, it fuses with the owner. Over time, it will feel like nothing happened, but it might be a little bit more flexible than normal."

Pinkie ooo'ed at this. "That sounds neat! Like I can bend it the other way?"

"Not exactly, the bones are going to form normally too. I just mean that your hoof and limb may be stronger, as bio-prosthetic limbs like replacing a limb with the strongest version of a limb you can imagine."

"They cost a fortune," Bonbon said, frowning at Pinkie. "We don't have any here. In fact, that may be the only one we have left."

"We have two more, Bonbon," Lyra said, glancing pleadingly at her. The earth pony sighed and looked away.

"Sorry," she grumbled, "just that… we're going to have to justify all this. We used one of our bio-prosthetic limbs and several pints of blood, and our friends are not happy."

"They're not happy?" Pinkie asked. "Well, if they need cheering up, I could-"

"No, you don't. One, you're in no condition to go prancing about," Bonbon snapped. "Two, you're the reason they are unhappy, because three, we don't know who you really are!"

Pinkie felt an invisible hoof buck her in the gut at these words. She almost collapsed, but Lyra caught her.

It was then that Pinkie managed to get a good look at Lyra. She was older, like everypony else she had run into. She was still the same size and build of the Lyra she knew, but age had done a number that a friend like Pinkie would know; it was in Bonbon's stature too.

Their body language, their eyes, everything about them had shown a pony who had been through more than one ever should. It showed fatigue, frustration, sorrow, and strain. Pinkie felt sad just by staring at them long enough.

Her right eye watered at all that was happening. That's when she remembered about her injury to her face, and lifted her good hoof to check. Medical tape, stitches, and an eyepatch could all be felt; Pinkie wanted to check in a mirror, but there wasn't one around.

"Your eyeball may never fully recover," Lyra admitted, wincing herself at how blunt that had come out. "I did my best with all my restoration magic, so maybe it won't be so bad; you have to understand, the eyeball is the second-most complicated part of a pony, only the brain is more complex. The scar is also kind of deep, it may stick around."

"Scars usually do," Pinkie muttered bitterly.

"Well, you haven't seen Lyra at her best," Bonbon said. Despite everything, the hint of bragging was in her voice. "She has become quite good at restomancy. You may notice all your teeth are back."

Pinkie ran her tongue around in her mouth. Sure enough, as if the beating from Fake AJ never happened, all of her teeth had been restored. They felt tender, but they were there.

"Wow! She's that good at healing spells? Lyra," she stared at the unicorn, who slightly blushed at the attention, "I don't remember you ever studying that."

"It happened after Ponyville."

"When did you two leave Ponyville? I know we're not there, are we at your new place? I mean…"

She failed to see Lyra and Bonbon exchange concerned glances as she peered around the building. Pinkie winced as she tried to think of complimentary words for what appeared to be a shanty house. The walls were poorly constructed, with gaps that could make peeping in possible.

Pinkie then realized the amount of tables that didn't appear to be for dining. One had some blood on it, and she remembered that that was the table she had been on. "Is this a hospital?" she asked.

"Yes," Lyra answered flatly, staring at Pinkie with confusion all over her face.

"It's… not bad, honest! But it's not like Ponyville's! Still, if you're a doctor now, Lyra, it's probably the best in all of Equestria!"

She beamed at her friend, and was surprised to see Lyra was still frowning in concern. Bonbon was staring too, and she muttered, "Did you check her for concussions?"

Pinkie Pie swallowed hard. "Oh. Oh dear, I'm afraid this is the part where I explain who I am, right?"

"That'd be really nice," Bonbon said. Lyra merely nodded.

The pink mare nodded back, then took a deep breath.

"I think I am from an alternate universe. Princess Celestia was showing the girls and I this thing called the Astral Screen, which was showing us all kinds of crazy universes out there, like ones where the mares are stallions and vice versa. Then it got all wibbly-wobbly, and I may or may not have touched it, I don't remember. And no, I'm not denying that suspiciously, I don't recall if I did that or not.

"Then I found myself here, and I saw freak ponies eating other ponies, and ponies kept trying to kill me, and there was a spikey marequin that tried to give me an evil hug, then there was Apple Fritter, then Applejack…"

She felt her foreleg in the sling throb, as if sense memory was bringing the agony back. Wincing, Pinkie continued, "This mare I am calling Fake AJ tortured and killed these unicorns, including a new friend of mine called Light Barrier, and then Rainbow Dash, or I'll call her Fake RD because she cannot be the same Dashie…

"She slashed my face with a spear, and that caused my facial injury, then I wound up here, and I heard Twilight Sparkle, or I'll call her Fake TS even if that doesn't sound appropriate for some reason, and she was in my head!"

Pinkie knocked on her head. "I could hear her as if her voice was right in my brain! Then I woke up, saw you two looking like you are a decade older than me, and I…

"I am so! Bucking! Confused! That my brain hurts like if I had been banging it against the wall for several hours! I've never done that, but I'm sure it would feel the same!"

Lyra and Bonbon stared at her. They continued to stare, until Pinkie Pie realized they hadn't followed, or believed, a word she said. The pink mare was used to this look, but now, it was painful to see.

Bonbon was about to say something, then the door to the antechamber opened. In walked Colgate, who was saying, "Lyra, Bonbon, we have a problem! The others… oh!"

She stopped short when she saw Pinkie sitting on the floor, awake and bandaged up, waving at her. She awkwardly waved back. "Hi… um, how are you?"

"That's a complex question right now, Colgate, but I can safely say without Lyra, I might be a little bit more... deady-weady. So things do look good in that sense… though I have been tortured, amputated, and abused. How has your day been? Are you still a dentist?"

Colgate blinked a few times, then glanced at Bonbon. The earth pony rolled her eyes, and muttered, "She thinks she is from an alternate universe."

At this state, Colgate let out a most incredible gasp; it started everypony in the room. The blue unicorn was right in front of Pinkie in a heartbeat, cerulean magic springing from her horn to the pink mare's forehead. When Pinkie started shivering in panic and fear, she raised her hoof and soothingly whispered to her.

"No no, it's okay, I'm not going to hurt you."

"E… everypony so far has."

"Lyra and Bonbon haven't, and I won't. I swear to you. Pinkie Swear."

Pinkie managed to calm down long enough for Colgate to study her head. Then she released her magic grasp around Pinkie's head, and she said, "You say you are from an alternate reality?"

"Y-yes."

"Has anypony asked you if you were before me?"

"… The voice in my head earlier, the one that sounded like Twilight. It was asking me if I was from the Astral Plane-"

Colgate's second major gasp startled everypony again. "No! Oh no no no! You didn't tell her where you were, did you?"

"N-no! I didn't!"

"Oh thank goodness, that means she doesn't know where you are."

Bonbon cleared her throat. "Explanation, Colgate?"

"Okay, when I was in college, studying dentistry," she gestured to her mouth with a soft smile, "I did some studies on time and space. I figured since my Cutie Mark was an hourglass," she pat her flank with a smile, "I should know some things about it, you know?"

"You always are an overachiever, aren't you? Wait," Bonbon rubbed her chin and asked, "Your Cutie Mark is about time travel and alternate universes?"

"What? No no no, nothing like that! Jeepers, Bonbon, how long have we known each other?"

"Sorry, but I guess I just never asked," the yellow earth pony admitted. "I assumed it was about time."

"It's about punctuation! I'm a timely pony, and I guess that's why some of the studies came easier to me than most."

"How so?" Lyra asked.

"Well, Lyra hon, unlike your incredible self-teaching skills, I had to do quite a bit of reading to get something into my head. Like clockwork up there, my mom would say. Anyway! The major studies of Time and Universe in Equestria believed in something called the Astral Plane."

"I've been hearing about that," Pinkie Pie exclaimed. "Is it like the Astral Screen?"

"I don't know what that is, Pinkie, but it might be related. See, the Astral Plane is a like a world, a world we cannot travel to physically, without some powerful magic.

"Some say," Colgate waved her hoof in an all-encompassing motion, "that it is where magic originates from. Some say it is where the dead live in an afterlife. Some say it is the reality that monitors us… it's hard to say, no pony truly knows. Starswirl the Bearded and Einsteed both studied it to their dying days, they never found a true answer."

Lyra stared at Pinkie Pie. "She's from the Astral Plane?"

"No, if she was, she'd be radiating intense magic that even Bonbon could sense."

"What?" Bonbon asked, not sure if she should be offended or not.

"Unicorns are very much in tune with magic, especially ones who use it so much like Lyra and I," Colgate explained. "To you, if Pinkie Pie was from the Astral Plane, it would be as obvious as a big, neon sign. To myself, I can only sense it because there is a minuscule trace of astral magic lingering on her."

"Like some pony who had been there recently and not long?" Lyra asked. "I didn't sense it on her, though."

"You weren't looking for it. Twilight Sparkle must have been able to sense it, one way or another, but it's so small now, she couldn't even track it from Canterlot; I wouldn't be able to track it from the front door, even if I was looking for it."

"Well, thank goodness for that," Bonbon said. "Twilight bearing down on us is the last thing we want."

"What? How could you say that?" Pinkie declared. "Twilight probably would know most about this Astral Plane, wouldn't she? Unless… you mean Fake TS?"

Colgate, Lyra, and Bonbon exchanged looks, not sure what to say. Lyra was the first to try something, for at least her own sake.

"Pinkie, if you're really Pinkie," Lyra asked, "let me just ascertain for certain, okay?"

"Oki doki loki."

"… Who am I?"

"You're Lyra Heartstrings. You've been dating Bonbon for more than three years now, and we all are pretty anxious to see when you'll finally get married," Pinkie said. "Your birthday is Octoburr 3rd, your Cutie Mark was when you discovered how you can play the lyre so wonderfully (and that, by the way, is how Bonbon first met you), and you like to form hands with your magic to get things done.

"You also believe that the mythical creatures known as humans existed in Equestria once, you love wheat shakes, and Bonbon once told me that you're ticklish behind your right ear."

The three older versions of Pinkie's friends stared at her. Bonbon was blushing, and Lyra stared wide-eyed and open mouthed.

"You told Pinkie about that?" she exclaimed to her marefriend.

"I didn't mean to, and I thought… wait," Bonbon said, glancing between her marefriend and Pinkie. "Dating her for over three years?"

"Yeah, last time I checked, you two had been going out for three years, two months, one week, and five days."

Bonbon blinked a great many times, and exclaimed, "Okay, what in Tartarus is going on? Even I don't know how many years we've been dating, not even back then!"

"'Back then'?"

"One thing's for certain," Lyra said, "there's no way any pony could fake all this."

"And she definitely came from the Astral Plane, from another universe," Colgate added. "That was always a major theory, that the Astral Plane connected all of our universes together in an improbably large plane of space."

"Did I pass the test?" Pinkie asked, glancing between the three mares. "Um, if I didn't, how about Bonbon? Your birth name is Sweetie Drops, but everypony calls you Bonbon. You were born on Jufly 25th, and your Cutie Mark is about how you can make special candies. When you make them, they sometimes cause weird side effects like temporary voice changes, like the time you ate one and sounded like a grizzled fisher-stallion.

"I imagine that wasn't fun for Lyra that night. 'Yarr, ye landlubber Lyra, come on ovah and kiss mae like if tha ship's a'sinkin!' Yeah, that would have been weird-"

She was cut off when somepony hugged her. It was the most affectionate thing she could remember in what felt like an eternity. Lyra held Pinkie as tenderly as possible, making sure not to squeeze any of the areas that would be sensitive. The party pony returned it with her good foreleg.

"It's okay!" Lyra exclaimed. "We believe you! Oh you poor thing!" She stroked Pinkie's back and nuzzled her. "You have no idea what's going on, do you?"

"N-no," Pinkie stammered. She felt tears sting her eyes, as a rush of emotions hit her. "I… dang it, I'm crying so much, I feel like Rarity reading one of her very special romance novels!"

Bonbon swallowed, and Colgate let out a very suspicious, "Uhmm…" Lyra did not release the hug until Pinkie stopped shaking from her emotions.

"Sweetheart, Pinkie Pie," Lyra cooed, rubbing Pinkie's mane. It was only then that she realized her mane had gone flat, having lost the poof to it that symbolized her happy nature.

Pinkie didn't know when it deflated, maybe even when she was unconscious just before; it made her wonder how depression could have hit her that much when she was out.

"What's happened?" Pinkie asked. "I mean, besides my mane. It may return to normal when you all tell me I'm in a Coltari game, and I'm just doing a really bad job in the first level?"

Lyra shook her head. "Hon, tell us. In your world, what was the last major thing that happened in Ponyville?"

Pinkie tapped her chin. "Well, um, my sister Octavia and my friend Vinyl Scratch just moved to Ponyville. In my world, that is. Just yesterday they finished moving in!"

Bonbon covered her mouth in astonishment. "Oh no. That's… that's only a couple months before… before…"

The candy maker was now looking at her with real pity in her eyes. She even trotted over to Pinkie, and nuzzled her affectionately. "This isn't going to be easy for you, dear," she admitted, "but we'll try to catch you up on present time. Okay?"

Pinkie hugged her, and when Bonbon returned it, the party pony felt a kind of warmth that she had thought died the moment she entered this world. When Colgate nuzzled and hugged her too, it made her heart swell. Her mane went back to being poofy, no longer believing that everypony in this world was evil and cruel, or dead.

The look on Colgate's face, however, made her rather apprehensive. "Okay, what's going on?"

Colgate sighed, then gestured for Pinkie to sit on the sofa in the open room Bonbon had been napping it. Pinkie sat down, with Lyra sitting her bizarre manner of having her back against the sofa and her hind legs dangling over the side. She rested her hoof on Pinkie's as Bonbon sat down at the party pony's other side.

"Pinkie Pie, it's been approximately sixteen years since Vinyl Scratch and Octavia moved into Ponyville."

"Sixteen?!" Pinkie balked. "Oh… oh no! You know that that means? Bellamina is older than me here! I'm the baby of the family! Darn it!"

"Hon," Colgate said, raising a hoof. "Let me just ask you this: do you want me to outline the whole thing to you, or do you want the bullet points and then outline it?"

"Gimme the good news first, and then the bad. But I want the good first, I am still reeling from the sixteen years thing," she admitted. Pinkie rubbed her forehead. "Ugh, Bellamina's going to tease me about this for… sixteen years, maybe more."

"Pinkie, there is no good news."

This rather surprised the party pony. "There's… there's absolutely no good news?"

"Not unless you count that a few of us from Ponyville are still alive and sane, no."

Pinkie felt her mind spin, and with it, her left forearm, which felt like something had been sewn on to the stump when she thought about it, started to throb. Her head and left eye also started to burn with pain, and it took all of Lyra and Bonbon's efforts to calm her down.

Pinkie took several deep breaths, and then asked, very quietly, "Colgate… give me the bullet points."

The blue unicorn nodded, mentally trying to think of what to say that could dampen a blow to a Pinkie Pie she knew couldn't fully comprehend this. Sixteen years ago, she never would have believed a damn word she was about to say now herself. But Colgate knew all at once was better than the near-fatal hints Pinkie Pie had been receiving.

"The Royal Sisters have vanished entirely from Equestria, and yet the sun and moon still rise and set; it was all a lie, apparently.

"Equestria is now divided between five houses and a cult, led by your five best friends and a mysterious being called The Laughing Mare; they have all become extremists, Tartarus-bent on shaping Equestria in the way they want.

"Ponyville was flooded. Most everypony who lived there is dead or working for one of the six parties, including us, most regrettably.

"The Elements of Harmony, those gemstones that the six of you used? They have, from what we've heard, gone cold. No pony knows what has happened to them, or why they abandoned us too.

"And Pinkie Pie? You're dead."

Prologue Part 4 - The Forging of the Samurai

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Normally, when a being is told that they are dead, there is a natural suspension of disbelief. Nobody, especially if they didn't remember their final moments, would believe they died. One's mortality is something that is cherished, and defended fervently when threatened.

For Pinkie Pie, when she was told she was dead, she blinked, then checked herself for a pulse.

"No, I'm not," she said simply, staring at Colgate in confusion.

Colgate shook her head. "No no, what I mean is the you of this world, our Pinkie Pie, is dead."

Pinkie blinked again. She glanced at Bonbon and Lyra, both of whom nodded solemnly. Then the realization hit the pink mare, as befitting sound effects played in her head.

"How'd I go?" She asked. "Did I party myself to death? Did I stop eating my vegetables? Was I on my unicycle? My mother always said my wheel would be the death of me. Or was it if I stopped eating my vegetables?"

"Maybe," Colgate said, placing her hoof on Pinkie's leg, "we should start at the beginning."

Pinkie nodded, then glanced out the window of the primitive hospital. The sun was up in the sky, which brought a very important question to her mind, and thus her mouth.

"You said that Princess Celestia and Princess Luna had vanished," Pinkie said. "What happened? Did you look under the cushions for them? That's always where I'm finding things."

Colgate sighed. This wasn't going to be easy for her, mostly because of…

"I've been wrestling with this since it happened," she thought bitterly. "I never fully believed the blunt answer, and now, I have to force myself to say it."

The blue unicorn took a deep breath, and then said it. "The Royal Sisters, one day, without any warning, without any signs, vanished. They were gone, gone from Equestria, and no trace or not or anything to let us know what happened."

Bonbon chimed in. "And at first, everyone, not just ponies, were terrified. We thought the world was coming to an end. The sun would stay up forever and burn us all, or the moon would crash into the earth, causing destruction."

"Ponyville received the message by nightfall," Lyra said, shivering a little at the memory. "Twilight Sparkle received a message from her brother, that the Royal Sisters couldn't be found by anypony. When the news came to us, Ponyville acted like the end was nigh."

Colgate nodded. "Mass hysteria, coupled with some rather… interesting results."

Pinkie Pie didn't understand what this meant. Then she saw Lyra and Bonbon blushing, and she raised an eyebrow. "Okay, what'd you two do?" she asked, a tiny smile on her face.

"It doesn't matter anymore," Bonbon grumbled, glancing away.

"Except pretty much all of Ponyville could hear you, Bonbon, even over the panic," Colgate teased, allowing a small smile with this hard news.

"Wow," Pinkie thought. "Those two must have been really hungry for all of the candy at Bonbon's store if the whole town heard them eating!"

Colgate continued her world's history. "Twilight Sparkle, and your ring of friends, you all were determined to find the Royal Sisters. If ponies weren't aware that you six were the Elements of Harmony, they were then. Word spread around all of Equestria that you six would save us and bring the sisters back to us."

"Heck, some ponies thought you six were taking over, that the princesses had left Equestria in your hooves," Bonbon admitted. "Well, the fillies did. Scootaloo was adamant that Rainbow Dash was going to save the world, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle assuring all their friends their sisters would save them."

Pinkie nodded, and asked, "Wait, where are they now? The little girls?"

"One step at a time, Pinkie, and besides, they're not fillies anymore," Colgate said. "They're all fully-grown mares, as it has been fifteen years, according to you."

"Sorry. Continue."

Pinkie sunk into her seat a little more, cradling her arm in the sling. Lyra nuzzled her, sensing her apprehension.

"The six of you went to Canterlot," Colgate continued, "to deal with the issue. Politicians, other royalty, teachers, scientists, the military, everypony of authority was trying to keep the general population down. But as days turned into weeks, it really hit everypony hard…

"We had been lied to. The sun and moon rose and set, without any princess doing it. The world acted naturally, and we were all just the same without Celestia or Luna."

Colgate was watching Pinkie Pie, and could see, like she thought she would, the doubt and disbelief in Pinkie's face. "Now I'm not saying it's the same in your world. After all, your Celestia seems to have a better sense of the Astral Plane, so she's obviously more in control…"

"Still, wouldn't be too lax with the thought she's in control," Bonbon said, frowning in concern at Pinkie. "It took us all a long time to accept such a hard truth, and-"

"Wait wait wait!"

Pinkie lifted her hooves to have them stop, moving the arm in the sling. She winced in pain at doing something so foolish, and as the others tried to help her deal with the pain, she struggled to ask more.

"Are you sure they're not just… hiding or something?" Pinkie asked. "Maybe they got stuck somewhere? Maybe something evil trapped them… oh! King Sombra! In the Crystal Empire! Have you-"

"King Sombra has been destroyed, long before this happened," Colgate explained. "And before you ask, Discord has been sealed in stone again. It is another complicated story there. It couldn't have been changelings, and, well, there's no other theory on what it could have been.

"The problem was, no matter how strong the faith you six had, or how many ponies still believed, or how many leaders of Canterlot stood firm… a year after the Royal Sisters vanished, everything was Tartarus."

The blue unicorn strained, trying to recall the story without becoming too emotional. Pinkie could notice the tension, and she looked at Lyra and Bonbon for help. The mint unicorn managed a small smile for her.

"You visited Ponyville often," Lyra said to her. "You kept coming back to us all, and telling us what was going on in Canterlot. You kept our faith and hope alive, you saw the Cake twins as much as you could, trying to assure everypony to keep our strength. You were our anchor."

"Lyra," Bonbon said cautiously, "you shouldn't say that, that makes this harder."

"Well, I just want Pinkie to know that, in my eyes, she went out like a real hero."

Pinkie didn't blush a lot in her life, mostly because shame was so foreign to her. Still, this was enough to make her face heat up, but her pink coat mostly spared her showing signs of blushing to the others. Lyra pat her leg, as Bonbon sighed.

"After a year," the yellow mare said, picking up for Colgate, "Equestria was a festering with riotous rebellions. Ponyville was one of the few places that wasn't being torn apart by furious ponies. Ponies realized they'd been lied to all their lives, and thus could do whatever they bucking wanted…

"Or they believed that since the Royal Sisters were gone, they had to rise up and take control wherever they were. Rebellion was a norm then."

"Some of our pegasus friends told us the cloud cities, like Cloudsdale," Colgate spoke again, "had heavy pegasus rebellions. The Wonderbolts weren't able to keep it under control, or maybe they didn't want to."

"All the major cities were in uproar, from the news we were getting," Lyra said. "It was horrible. We were getting reports of deaths, which was surreal and terrible. Ponies killing ponies, over stupid things like thefts, or fights if the sisters had really abandoned us or not."

Bonbon nodded. "Then it went from hearing that a murder could actually happen, to how many would happen. Cloudsdale, Fillydelphia, Appleloosa, Hoofington, Manehattan, and even Canterlot were having all kinds of riots, mayhem, and other nasty chaos."

"The six of you were trying so hard for a year to find the sisters," Colgate reasoned. "But the royalty and upper class were leaving Canterlot for Manehattan, where they could live like the pampered, spoiled creeps they were. Then… then it all happened at once."

"Okay, what?" Pinkie asked. "You said that before, what happened all at once?"

The three mares were quiet, and Pinkie realized Lyra was squeezing her leg more now. When the pink mare stared at her, Lyra glanced at her with pained eyes.

"Twilight's parents were killed," she said. "Murdered by pegasus rebels, who attacked a council meeting to make demands. After that, Twilight… she snapped."

"All we know is that one day, Applejack came back to Ponyville, so mad that she looked ready to kill somepony herself," Bonbon said. "All she would say was that Twilight was going to force an alicorn transformation, to take the place of the princesses."

"What?" Pinkie exclaimed. "Is… is that possible?"

"It's been fifteen years since she vowed she'd do it," Colgate said. "The answer is no, it's impossible, but Twilight has not seen reason. Even… even after the first, fatal attempt."

"Fatal? Twilight's dead?!"

"No, Pinkie," Bonbon said. She opened her mouth, closed it, groaned in frustration, then spat it out. "You are. Were. Our Pinkie's dead."

The party pony stared, wide eye, silent for one of those rare times that did seem to be increasing since she came to this dreadful world. "Okay, what'd I do wrong?"

"You didn't do anything wrong," Bonbon exclaimed. She attempted to calm herself down, as Pinkie stared at her in shock. Her fellow earth pony sighed hard, then muttered, "Twilight killed you."

"Bonbon, please, let's not complicate things when we're explaining them," Colgate pleaded. She turned to Pinkie, who was so shocked that wordless whimpers and cries, her eyes watering. "Please… remember, we're talking to a Pinkie Pie who comes from a loving, peaceful world. Right, Pinkie?"

At first, Pinkie didn't reply. Then she nodded, staring at the floor, whispering, "It's wonderful back home… Twilight… she just helped us assemble for the Equestrian Games in the Crystal Empire."

Colgate nodded. "That happened here too… well, the games themselves were cancelled when the Princesses disappeared. But to explain better, Twilight had banned AJ from Canterlot, calling her a traitor to the throne.

"Apparently, for the alicorn creation spell, Twilight needed a unicorn, which was herself, a pegasus, and an earth pony. Applejack had refused, where Rainbow Dash had accepted as the pegasus role. And, from what we gather, Pinkie, you were coerced into being the earth pony."

Pinkie whimpered again, louder this time. Bonbon held her, and said, "You would do anything for your friends. You probably felt this would help them, the princesses, everypony. Like Lyra said, you were a friend and a hero."

Lyra sniffed audibly, and they saw she was struggling not to cry. "I'll never forget that day. Derpy had a letter that she had opened, by accident. She started to read some of it to make sure it arrived to the right pony: Octavia."

The mint unicorn's golden eyes were wet as she managed to look at Pinkie. "She was crying so hard, and she at first refused to give the letter to Octavia. Vinyl Scratch read it, in front of so many of us… we had all gathered when Derpy started to make a scene with how sad she was; Derpy was bawling, hiccuping, she couldn't control it."

Pinkie glanced down at herself, her one good eye scanning at her damaged, but still living body. "And Dashie?" she asked quietly. "And Twilight?"

"Dash survived the attempted alicorn transformation spell, but she was terribly burned," Bonbon explained. "Twilight… not a scratch. We've heard she has tried again, but that's only rumors."

Colgate sighed hard, as she observed the mares in front of her. "Well, Pinkie, this is all very hard to take in, shall we take a break?"

"No no, just," she said with a heavy sigh, "just tell me now. I want to know… because I'm stuck here, apparently."

The blue unicorn nodded, running her tongue against her teeth as she tried to think back. "We don't know all the details, we're very in the dark about much. But here's the lowdown:

"Applejack practically went berserk when Pinkie Pie was killed. She started to form a House, rather much like a guild and an army combined. She started with her family, and the earth and pegasus ponies in Ponyville. And she, as well as leaders of her House, developed a rather fervent hatred for unicorns.

"Rainbow Dash, after she recovered, was still on Twilight's side… for the time being. She was recruited into House Stormwing, which was a House that was formed by the major cloud cities. It was originally to fight the rebels who were causing pain, rioting, and death, and to keep the faith for Celestia and Luna alive."

Colgate paused to trot over to the window, staring out up at the sky. "Rainbow Dash and Applejack recruited from Ponyville. Many ponies were moving there to avoid the riots and dangers of cities. Ponyville was practically a booming city with how much it expanded. And then, Applejack drew a line.

"Twilight Sparkle had formed in Canterlot her own House: House Moon & Star. It called for total obedience to the Royal Sisters, the advance of progress in science, magic, and medicine, and a unicorn superior civilization. Applejack was so outraged, she forced Mayor Mare to set up anti-unicorn standards for Ponyville."

"No!"

Pinkie almost stood up, forgetting her injuries as Bonbon and Lyra helped her back down. She panted as her emotions ran wild through her mind, trying and failing to picture her friends doing these odious endeavors. Finally, her eyes fell on Lyra, and she whimpered, "But… but you and Applejack have known each other for years! You two-"

"It didn't matter, sweetheart," Lyra said, holding Pinkie tenderly. "Pinkie, when Applejack came to our home with restrictions for me, she wasn't the Applejack we both knew. There was anger, determination, frustration, and all that stubbornness we know her for… but no love."

"But what about Vinyl?" Pinkie asked desperately. "Sea Swirl? … Rarity?! She didn't-"

"She did," Bonbon said. "Applejack even set these new laws on Rarity, on Rarity's family. Sweetie Belle wouldn't even be able to go to school with her friends, and we all knew at that point, Apple Bloom was denied being able to see her."

Pinkie hung her head in sorrow, taking deep breaths. She sighed heavily, and said, "When Princess Celestia told me some worlds out there were bad, I wasn't ready for this. At worst, I thought there would be worlds out there where things were inverted, like Dashie was into fashion and talked like Rarity!"

"If only," Bonbon said. She didn't look keen to continue, so she gazed at Colgate for help. The dentist mare nodded, and continued.

"What happened next was rather quick too. Rarity was so outraged, she took every pony who would leave Ponyville to go to Manehattan. She knew ponies there, and felt we had a life there. And… despite what's happened since, we're alive now because of it."

Lyra, Bonbon, and Colgate all clammed up, and Pinkie stared at them for answers. Thinking back to Colgate summing things up, she guessed aloud, "The flood?"

"House Stormwing caused it," the blue unicorn said. "The pegasi in the air wore their symbol. And… Rainbow Dash was involved."

"No," Pinkie breathed out the word, then screamed it, "No! Dashie wouldn't flood Ponyville! Never!"

"We're not sure why, if our town was the true, intended target or not," Colgate continued, despite the outburst. "But what we do know is that if we hadn't left Ponyville when we did, we all might have drowned. The waters that came rampaging into Ponyville, the hurricane that was blowing… it was so devastating, it must have taken an army to make it happen."

Lyra hugged Bonbon, shivering at the memories. The two cuddled each other, and Pinkie watched them for her own mental comfort. The party pony turned back to Colgate, and asked, "Who else survived?"

"A lot of us, a list would take too long to say now, and I know you know all of Ponyville-"

"Please! Just tell me… my sister? Vinyl?"

The three exchanged glances, and Pinkie felt her heart stop for a second. She swallowed hard, then whimpered, "I… I just have to realize she wasn't my sister, my sister is alive in my world, fine… just fine…"

"Pinkie, your sister came with us when we left Ponyville," Bonbon said. "Vinyl too. But we have lost contact with them. We don't know where they are and if they're alive."

With a heavy exhale, Pinkie allowed herself to calm down. "So… what happened after that?"

"House Earthborn declared war on House Stormwing," Colgate explained. "And, something else must have happened in the background with the leaders, because both Houses declared war with House Moon & Star. They've been three of the main powers, all wanting supremacy for their race."

"Led by Dashie, Twili, and AJ." Pinkie sank into the sofa again, staring up at the ceiling. "But you said Dashie was recruited into House Stormwing. How'd she end up leading it?"

"Promotion, reputation, Element of Loyalty, maybe something else," Colgate said with a shrug. "No idea, hon."

Pinkie sighed, then pulled herself up to her three hooves on the ground. The three watched her pace around a little, as she tried to take this all in. "What happened," she asked, "to Rarity?"

"A very long story too, but let me try to be brief for now. Rarity got herself into the upper class in Manehattan, which is a short distance from us. And, with some very underhoofed tactics, she somehow made herself the leader of the upper class and royalty of Manehattan."

"She's forgotten about us," Bonbon said with a roll of her eyes. "In her efforts to get to the top, we got stuck in the slums. The Undercity, it's called. It's where everypony who cannot afford the money to live in the real Manehattan have to live… if you can call it that."

"Is that," Pinkie Pie glanced out the window, "where we are now?"

"No, we are an expedition of a kind," Lyra said, managing a smile. "You see, we're archaeologists right now, you could say."

"Oh, like Daring Do?"

Bonbon failed to stifle a chuckle. "No no. We are an expedition sent out here for a few months. We did for artifacts, gems, and the like. We live in these crappy houses, while diamond dogs monitor our progress."

"Diamond dogs?" Pinkie thought back to the ugly creatures that took Rarity away by force. "They work with you all?"

"They're more like slave drivers and sycophants to Rarity," Colgate said. "You're going to have to keep your distance from them, Pinkie."

Pinkie nodded, then glanced between the three mares. "Okay, I need to know." She sighed as she sunk back into the couch. "You all seemed to not trust me earlier. Why?"

The three mares all exchanged glances, not wanting to be the one to tell Pinkie why. Chewing on her bottom lip, Colgate decided to be the bearer of bad news.

"Pinkie, there is a cult out there called the Cult of Laughter," she explained. "They are everywhere around Equestria, and they are the most vicious, sadistic, macabre ponies and beings one can imagine."

"Straight from nightmares," Bonbon commented. "And the Tartarus of it all is that they are laughing and smiling always, so cheerful as they deal with death."

"We've seen them a couple times," Lyra said. She swallowed, and said, "The followers are so fanatic, it's like… there's no pony left in their eyes. They're just a hollow shell with a grin plastered on their face."

Pinkie winced. The last thing in the world she wanted to imagine was for smiles and joy to be corrupted like that. Smiles were supposed to be pure, kind, a friendly gesture to another being. Now they were a mask for evil? Unacceptable.

"Um, this cult sounds awful, and I think I encountered a few in my short trip here," she said, "but what's this have to do with me? You told me the Pinkie here is dead."

Lyra placed a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder. "Pinkie, the problem is that there are so many rumors circulating over who is leading the Cult of Laughter. And from what we've gathered, it's a pink-coated pony known as The Laughing Mare. And…"

The mint unicorn didn't know how to say the next part, so she just spat it out as fast as possible. "The biggest rumor is that it is our Pinkie, come back from the dead, to exact revenge on her former friends, as well as any pony standing in her way."

Silence permeated the make-shift hospital. The three mares all watched Pinkie Pie, wondering what she would. The pink mare was staring down at her hind legs, wide-eyed, mouth hanging open. No pony said a word for a minute or two.

And then Pinkie burst out laughing.

"Me, coming back from the dead for revenge?" she cackled, snorting merrily as the three mares gaped at her. "Ponies think I'm some evil zombie? That's hilarious!"

"Pinkie, the Cult of Laughter is no joke," Colgate exclaimed. "They are known for torture and murder!"

The pink mare's laughter died down at this, and she wiped her eyes with her good foreleg. "I know, I'm sorry, but," she let out one more giggle, "it's so silly to think that ponies believe I'm an evil monster."

"We know you come from a good universe, Pinkie, but don't take this so lightly," Colgate instructed her. "Things are not good for us all, and most of us, we don't know what to believe."

Pinkie nodded. The door to the antechamber slammed open, startling them all. A flurry of hoof falls clamored into the hospital, with a familiar voice shouting, "Colgate, Colgate, Colgate! Minuette! Colgate! Hey, toothpaste!"

Berry Punch practically fell into the room the four were seated in, scrambling to stand upright as she panted in exasperation. "You left me all alone with a bunch of mad ponies! They're getting ready to storm the hospital!"

Colgate stood up right away, and peered out the window. The sun was setting, but she could see, with the scant amount of light, her fellow ponies all gathered near the hospital. The others could hear them outside, the commotion of angry talk and stomping hooves seemingly barring down on the building.

"They've got pitchforks and shovels and pickaxes, the whole works," Berry continued. She gripped her head, as if to stop it from shaking uncontrollably, wailing, "It's an ugly mob, Minuette, they're all angry and raring!"

"Berry," Colgate exclaimed. "Calm down. We will face these ponies together. Pinkie."

The balloon-marked mare glanced over at her. "You know how long it's been since I heard somepony call you by your birth name, Colgate? Did you two-"

"Pinkie! Focus! I'm sorry, sweetheart, but this is very, very serious."

Colgate's blue eyes flared, like solid cobalt. Pinkie swallowed hard, and nodded. "The ponies of this place… they fear that I'm a member of the cult?"

"Hang on," Berry said, peering at the injured pony, "she ain't?"

"No, she isn't, Berry."

The magenta coated pony stared long and hard at Pinkie, then shrugged. "Well hay, if Colgate says you're fine, you're fine. But!" She looked over at the blue unicorn, her eyes desperate again. "What are we going to do? They're pretty determined to keep us all safe out there, Colgate!"

Colgate hummed in thought, as Lyra and Bonbon pulled themselves off the couch and stood at Pinkie's sides. "We are not," Lyra stated firmly, "going to let anything happen to her."

"Yes," Bonbon agreed, stomping one of her hooves. "I mean, I don't fully understand what is going on, but I'm not about to have some angry mob tear into us."

"We're going to be fine if we keep our heads on," Colgate stated. She turned to Pinkie and said, "Do not speak until you are addressed, Pinkie. Don't laugh, don't grin at the ponies, even ones you recognize. If the ponies out there think you are a member of the Cult of Laughter, a smile may be the last thing you want to do."

This was enough to make Pinkie's face fall into the saddest frown the mares had seen in a long time. Pinkie sighed hard, lamenting again the corruption of the smile. She sniffed, then glanced up at them. "Thank you all so much… for everything."

She wiggled her head to imply her eyepatch, and also moved her forearm in the sling as much as she could. "You really are wonderful ponies, and such good friends too."

Colgate sighed. "Pinkie, you really need to know now that we're not the same ponies as the ones from your world. We're a decade and a half older, we've been living in Tartarus on Equestria all this time, and we should find you a way to get back home soon."

As Berry Punch tried to figure out what the hay all that meant, Pinkie let out a small giggle. "You all took me in against those ponies' wishes, you saved my life, gave me my forearm back, and have been nothing but kind to me. Now you're all going to go talk to an angry mob to save me.

"I think that's a good start at being friends," Pinkie said, smiling for a few more seconds before frowning like Colgate suggested. "Just after this, let me make it up to you."

Lyra smiled before any of the others, and tapped the side of her noggin near her eye. "I Pinkie Pie Swear, as you used to do."

Colgate allowed a chuckle, then walked over to the door to outside. Using her cerulean magic, she turned the knob, saying, "Wait here until I call for you." She opened it up and stepped out to a rather intimidating sight of about twenty to thirty ponies.

At the forefront of them was Marigold, standing her ground firmly. The other ponies all appeared as determined as her, holding random tools. Some were glancing to the sides, fearful of being caught.

"Is this what we have boiled down to?" Colgate asked, her tone level but angry. "A lynch mob?"

"Don't start lecturing, Colgate," Marigold shouted. "We are not savages, but we are also not fools!"

Many of the ponies voices their agreement, as some of them raised their weapons. Colgate glanced among them, trying to discern who was there. It made her rather apprehensive to see so many of Ponyville's former citizens.

"It's come down to personal safety over mercy and compassion," Colgate thought. "This war has long since killed true kindness, Minuette… and you know that better than anypony. You're so frustrated at it, you're referring to yourself with your birth name again."

"We will not risk the safety of our town here," Marigold continued. "We have over a hundred ponies, including foals and fillies. Remember what happened the last time we trusted a stranger?"

"If you recall, Marigold," Colgate said patiently, "I was against that mare entering our village then, like you; I did not feel safe around her."

"And what makes this mare so different?! For the love of Equestria, she looks like Pinkie Pie."

"If you will allow me to try and explain to you all," Colgate said, raising her hooves, "I think an explanation would be good for you all."

"We don't need an explanation," a stallion shouted, "I'm not risking my family's life!"

"We're stuck out here in the middle of nowhere, possibly within enemy range," a mare hollered, "digging for 'Mistress' Rarity, and you want us to risky our lives even more?"

"Haven't we been through enough?" Marigold asked, pushing her face into Colgate's. "We may be stuck out here for half a year more! Some of us just want to make this all pass by without incident!"

The ramble of the angry mob continued, with Colgate started to mentally panic. Then a mare's voice in the back shouted, "Hey! Give her a chance to explain! We owe her that much!"

Everypony recognized the pony who had spoken, and thus the shouting stopped. Colgate sighed in relief mentally when she saw the mob cool down by this one voice.

"Alright, let me make this clear," the cerulean unicorn announced, "I do not want any harm to come to Burrow XXVII, so let me just explain the issue with this mysterious pony…"

Inside the makeshift hospital, the four ponies could overhear everything being said. Only Lyra Heartstrings was truly listening to what was being said, praying silently that this would resolve without any major conflict.

Bonbon stared at the floor, trying to keep her mind off of the overwhelming feeling of stress creeping up on her. Berry Punch was idly swinging her hoof, thinking about how much she could use a drink right now, of all times; she couldn't remember the last time she had a good drink.

Pinkie Pie was lost in such an intense stream of thought, it would be impossible to pick out one subject, or even a list of them, to discern where her mind was at. When she overheard Colgate said to the mob outside, "The former Elements of Harmony know of this plane's existence, though to what extent I do not know," Pinkie's train of thought crashed into a particular station.

"Bonbon, Lyra," she spoke up, "Berry, I have to ask you something. You told me about Twilight, Dashie, Applejack, Rarity, and myself, but what about Fluttershy? What happened to her?"

Bonbon exchanged glances with the other two. While Lyra became rather distraught, Berry sighed through her nose and looked away. Finally, Bonbon answered for them.

"We're not sure exactly, but remember when we said that Everfree Forest is growing and trying to crush civilization of ponies?" When Pinkie nodded, she continued. "All we know is that, sometime after Ponyville was flooded, Fluttershy became the Lady of the Forest, the leader of House Everfree."

"She is basically a force of nature," Lyra muttered. "Animals and plants are said to obey her every command within the forest. Her armies consist of zebras, minotaurs, and so many ponies who want to see nature win over civilization."

"Some ponies say," Berry Punch spoke out, "that even dragons do what Fluttershy says. But that's all rumors, there's been no news of dragon strikes."

"Whatever you do, don't mention House Everfree, or Fluttershy, around Marigold," Bonbon instructed Pinkie. "Her sister joined them, and she hasn't heard from her in over a decade. She is, technically, the enemy."

Pinkie Pie nodded, then glanced at the door leading outside. She could still hear Colgate reasoning with the crowd, mostly Marigold. The party pony studied her broken self once more, with her one good eye.

"Well, what have I got to lose?" she asked aloud. When the others stared at her, she explained, "Either your friends out there accept me, or they don't and I have to go."

"Pinkie, if you're thinking what I think you're thinking," Bonbon started to say. She stopped, and shook her head. "Ugh! It doesn't matter how long it's been! Fifteen years or not, you still manage to confuse me!"

"Pinkie," Lyra spoke, "if you head out there, you could die. This world is a dangerous, violent place."

"Oh, I know that. But frankly, I'm still not fully convinced I didn't just get teleported into a complex, mature-rated game. Now it's time for me to use my diplomatic skills and make the right choice of dialogue to save the day!"

And with her good fore hoof, she pushed the door open and stepped outside.

The three ponies inside were too shocked and stupefied by her words to stop her. Colgate whipped her head around towards the hospital door, and found herself staring at Pinkie. The mob narrowed their eyes at her. Marigold studied her, and Pinkie observed her right back.

She definitely lived up to her name. Marigold's light orange coat matched well with her wispy mane and tail, curly locks of dark orange and yellow. Her feminine eyes, even if they were hardened with anger and fear, led Pinkie to think that maybe she was a gardener before this Equestria went wrong.

"Hi," Pinkie said with a pleasant smile, rather than a big, casual one. "Listen, I know you all are scared of me, but I have something to tell you."

"Pinkie, I am trying," Colgate tried to explain, but Marigold cut her off, waving her orange hoof.

"Alternate universe, we heard," the orange earth pony exclaimed. "That's nonsense!"

"But I can prove it," Pinkie exclaimed, waving her good foreleg around. "You see, in my dimension, or universe, or side-story, spin-off game… I still am not sure even if Colgate explained with her big wordy terms!

"So, to go back to what I was saying, I can prove that I am not a mean, violent Pinkie Pie!"

"Oh really?" Marigold asked, her frown darkening. "We're not going to believe anything you say."

Pinkie shook her head, then used her good foreleg to start rummaging through her mane. "I think, despite using it earlier, I have one more load in it…"

The party pony fervently searched, and a few objects spilled out: a bouncy ball, a fake mustache with glasses, her towel.

"You let her," a stallion exclaimed at Colgate, "keep all of that stuff?"

"We checked her mane, but we didn't find anything!"

Pinkie Pie finally found what she was looking for, and everypony gasped at the sight of the Pinkie Pie Bazooka. "Weapon," Marigold shrieked, "she has a wea-"

Pinkie pointed up at the sky and pulled the trigger. A pink flare shot from her bazooka, and burst a couple yards above them. Balloons drifted up into the air, confetti sprayed the startled mob, and then it rained something that normally never rains down.

Cupcakes.

Chocolate, vanilla, strawberry and cherry, the tasty treats fell down around the ponies. Lyra, Bonbon, and Berry stepped outside just in time for a few cupcakes to fall in front of them. One of the frosted treats bopped Colgate on the noggin, and when she reached out, it fell into the center of her fore hoof.

"Oh my," the cerulean unicorn said. "Cupcakes. I cannot remember the last time-"

"No no no," Marigold shouted, waving her orange hooves at the other ponies who were picking them up. The sight of the frosted treats were making almost every pony's mouth water. "They could be poisoned! Don't eat them, she's-"

She stopped when Lyra stepped up, holding one of the cupcakes in her hoof, and then defiantly stuffed it in her mouth. Everypony gasped at this sign of ultimate trust, as she chewed. Then she stopped, and everypony held their breath in terror.

"Oh my," Lyra whispered, muffled with a mouthful. "It's… oh it's been too long! Cupcake!"

She swallowed, and a tear of joy spilled down her cheek. "Fifteen years it has been! Oh, it's so good! Thank you, Pinkie!" She embraced Pinkie in an overjoyed hug.

With their doctor enjoying a sugary treat with the utmost pleasure, the mob of ponies immediately took to eating the cupcakes. Marigold surveyed with horror, shouting, "No no no, it could be a delayed poison! The Cult of Laughter, ponies! We have to…"

She stopped again, when she saw the pegasus stallion standing next to her eagerly licking the frosting off of a cupcake. "Honey," she exclaimed. "Wha… why?"

"Oh you have to try one, sweetie," he said. Like Lyra, the stallion was shedding a tear. "It's… it's like tasting sugar for the first time."

Marigold stared at him, then at a cupcake that had fallen in front of her. She scooped it up very gently, like if it was possibly explosive. Observing it, as well as the ponies around her, she stared at Pinkie again.

"Who are you?" she asked.

"I am Pinkie Pie," the party pony stated happily.

"Why are you doing this? I don't understand, if you're not from this world, why are you being nice?"

"It's because I have friends here!"

"What? But you just arrived here, how could you…"

Pinkie Pie gestured back to the four ponies who had met her. Lyra was licking a bit of frosting that had stuck to Bonbon's cheek, and the yellow earth pony giggled uncharacteristically but honestly. Berry was licking her hooves clean, savoring every last bit, her magenta eyes wide in delight. Colgate was eating hers slowly, her dentistry not stopping her from enjoying this treat.

"Well, they saved my life, and I gave them cupcakes," Pinkie reasoned, beaming back at them. "I've made friends on smaller premises."

As she giggled, feeling like herself again, she surveyed the crowd of ponies. All of them had dropped whatever tools and weapons they had brought. She felt good, seeing so many ponies smiling again, genuinely.

"WHAT! Is going around on here, ponies?"

All of the ponies froze up, some in mid-munch. Pinkie Pie scanned the crowd, until she saw who everypony had frozen: a diamond dog. It was one of the smaller kind, but still slightly bigger than the average pony.

This one had dark gray fur, and a vest that vaguely reminded Pinkie of an officer. The few pins that he had displayed vaguely verified that.

"What is going on?" the diamond dog's high-pitched voice screeched, wading through the crowd. "What are you eating? What…"

He stopped in front of Pinkie Pie, and stared. He glanced at her, her eyepatch, her forearm in a sling, and at her unusually poofy mane. "Who are you?" he asked.

"Who are you?" she countered.

"I asked you first!"

"No, I did!"

"Oh, you did? Well, I'm Snoogle, nice to meet you." He extended his paw, she offered her hoof, and they shook for a moment before he snapped back. "Hey, wait a minute! No you didn't!"

"Sorry, couldn't resist! I am Pinkie Pie!"

"I have not seen you around," Snoogle snarled, then snapped his head over to Colgate. "Who is this pony?"

"She is a friend of mine who survived bad encounters with the cult, but rest assured, she is safe." Colgate put her blue hoof on Pinkie's shoulder, smiling at her. "She is very trustworthy."

"She may be spy," Snoogle pointed out, narrowing his yellow eyes at Pinkie.

"Do I look like spy?" Pinkie asked innocently.

"If you are a spy, you are probably very bad spy, with how bad you be looking."

Snoogle sniffed Pinkie, deep whiffs around her. He scrambled back, staring at her incredulously. "Why you smell… different? You no smell like normal pony?"

"Maybe it is cupcakes!" Pinkie then procured one on her hoof, offering the vanilla cupcake with baby blue frosting. "Cupcake for Snoogle?"

The diamond dog officer sniffed the treat, and he very openly salivated. Almost as if embarrassed, he wiped his mouth, and said, "Wait, I is not supposed to take bribes from ponies!"

"It's not a bribe, it's a treat!"

"Go on, Snoogle," Lyra said, nodding at the diamond dog. "It's fine, we're all having them!"

Snoogle glanced around at all the ponies, then took the cupcake and greedily scarfed it down. "Oh, yes! So good! The flavor! So sweet and tasty!"

"Don't be too hasty," Pinkie cautioned him. "Savor it! We might not be able to make more for a long time!"

Snoogle nodded, and licked his paws. "Thank you! Been long time since we has had good foods here!"

As the diamond dog savored the taste of the cupcake, Pinkie leaned over to Lyra. "What's he doing here? Does he help with the archaeology dig?"

"The diamond dogs are more here for guards and command," Lyra whispered. "They're not here to help, just lead us and make sure we do as we're supposed to. House Whitegold uses diamond dogs when they don't want to use their militia and guards for patrolling us."

"Are they alright?"

Bonbon interjected. "For the most part, no. They're brutish, and they know that they can abuse the little power they have here. Though I will say, they aren't aggressive, just mean."

"Snoogle here is alright," Lyra said. "A little bit of a stickler for rules, but he's tolerable, and treats us all right."

"So, if I got this right," Pinkie said, "you're a mining town that is policed by diamond dogs, trying to find archaeological finds, all under the protection of House Whitegold… which is run by Rarity."

"Make sure to call her Mistress Rarity, or Lady Rarity," Bonbon cautioned her, rolling her eyes. "Some of the diamond dogs get very angry if you don't address her in that way, and they can get ugly…"

Some cries of terror came from the back of the crowd, and ponies were scurrying out of the way. This time, Pinkie didn't have to look for the source of disturbance, it was looming over the ponies.

A diamond dog, as tall as three ponies standing on each other, pushed his way through the crowd. He wasn't gentle, either, as he knocked aside ponies with his massive arms. When he reached the center, he spoke with a gravely voice that sent shivers up Pinkie's spine.

"What is going on here?" he asked, pointing at Snoogle with that muscular, dull gray paw. "You are supposed to be managing these ponies."

"I am managing them," Snoogle snapped at him. "They is on break, what-"

"I smell something on you, smells like food," the diamond dog brute leaned over and sniffed him. "Are you eating with the ponies? The only eating we should be doing with them is if we are eating them!"

"Who is that?" Pinkie whispered to Lyra and Bonbon, quaking in fear.

"That's Maim," Lyra replied, her voice kept so low that Pinkie could barely hear her. "Appropriately named. He's a main guard here, but he acts like a jail warden, with all the brutality of a dragon."

"He loves to hurt ponies, he's caused more injuries at this town than the dig," Bonbon added. "Give him any excuse, he'll rough you up."

"We've been watching him, as much as he watches us," Colgate interjected, her eyes narrowed. "We're very concerned he will-"

"Hey!"

The booming bark of Maim startled everypony, as he turned from his argument with Snoogle, to glare at Colgate. "You again, the troublemaker! What were you saying 'bout me?"

"We weren't talking about you," Colgate said, through clenched teeth.

"Oh yeah?"

He approached her, and it was then that Pinkie realized one of his fists was the size of a pony. He was wearing leather armor that appeared poorly maintained, and had a few blades in the belt's sheathes; it was more of a bad sign how much he must have wanted to live up to his name.

"And who is this?" Maim asked, pointing at Pinkie Pie. He snickered when she backed up, shivering in fear of this large diamond dog. "Fresh meat? What's left of her, that is."

"She's a new member, she just had an accident," Colgate said. "Lyra tended to her, she'll be able to work soon."

"She'd better. No pony slacks off at my dig, you hear me?"

Colgate stared him down, as if to dare him over this statement. Maim scoffed and waved his paw. "Whatever. Just get ready to get back to work soon, ponies, in an hour."

"What?" Marigold's coltfriend exclaimed. "But the next dig shift isn't for two hours!"

"I change it now, since you all seem to be so content in slacking off," Maim said, grinning at the flabbergasted ponies. "If you all aren't there, I'll have to break some legs. Or wings, or horns, or anything else I care to."

Snoogle growled at him. "You know, you don't get to justs change hours like that, we has a system-"

"SHUT UP!

Maim swung at Snoogle with the back of his paw, hitting him in the side of his head. The smaller diamond dog fell down, clutching the bruised wound. Ponies scurried away, crying out in terror.

"I is sick of you undermining me," Maim shouted, "at my mine! This is my dig site, and I-"

"Leave him alone!"

Everypony gasped in terror, again, as Pinkie Pie took a hobbling step towards Maim. "No one, pony or dog," she seethed, "hurts a friend of mine!"

"What? Excuse you?" Maim snarled. His lips were pulled back, and the muscles in his arms tightened. "Do you want to die?"

Pinkie Pie wobbled on her three legs, but otherwise stood firm. "You can't go around hurting others like that! Not during times like these!"

"Times like these? You mean when Maim," he said slowly, approaching her with bared teeth, "feasts on a crippled pony? That kind of time?"

He hunched up, ready to lunge, when Berry Punch stepped in-between the two. "Just try it, you ugly son of a bitch," she spat. "You try hurting her, you're gonna have to get through me!"

"And me," Lyra said, stepping up too. "I will not allow you to harm a patient of mine, especially not a friend."

Bonbon walked up next to Lyra, and put her forearm around her lover. Colgate trotted up and nodded, her horn swirling with dark blue magic.

"Two unicorns and two earth ponies, thinking you can stand up to me?" Maim asked, cackling. "More food for me! I don't suppose I could use the horns to pick my teeth!"

He raised his massive paw, and swung down at the four ponies between him at Pinkie. They all leapt away, and the tremor that he caused when striking the ground knocked Pinkie off her hooves. Maim balled up his other paw into a fist, and swung down at the party pony.

Mid-swing, a blast of magenta magic hit him in the side of the face. He wasn't hurt, more so stunned slightly. He hobbled back, just as Berry Punch bucked at him in the ribs. The dull sounding impact didn't even budge Maim, nor did Bonbon stomping on his foot paw.

A cerulean blast of magic, a stunning missile, knocked Maim back a step, but again seemed more annoyed than hurt. He snarled loudly, feral and vicious, as he turned towards the second magic caster.

"You will stop this now," Colgate ordered him. "The diamond dogs may be in charge of Burrow XXVII, but you are not allowed to abuse the citizens of this mining city. You will stand down, we are in the right."

"Do as they says, Maim," Snoogle, nursing a bloody lip, shouted. "This will not be tolerated!"

"They're just ponies," the brute diamond dog snapped.

"I am not pony, other dogs will not tolerate violence against each other!" Snoogle stood up, wiping his damaged lip. "Now you back off, right now!"

Maim snarled again, then glanced at Pinkie. He pointed at her, narrowing his eyes, and walked off. Before he was away, he turned and said, "Dig starts in half-hour now. Blame the pink one, especially if you ponies no have had dinner yet."

His footfalls, stomping off and away, seemed to cause tremors that shook their way to Pinkie's heart. She placed her good hoof over her heart, trying to calm it down. Staring at the floor, she whimpered, "Sorry. I… I shouldn't have spoken out like that… I'm causing trouble."

"It's about time somepony put that jerk in his place," Colgate said. "He needs to be reminded time to time, that ponies will stand up against him."

Pinkie nodded a little, then her ears perked up. "Hey, who was it that fired that first bolt? That wasn't you or Lyra!"

"That would be me."

Pinkie Pie watched as a unicorn trotted through the crowd of nervous ponies, and her eyes widened when she saw who it was. The mauve mare that approached had a semi-annoyed but relieved look on her face.

"You know, you really should have known better," Amethyst Star grumbled. "I mean, if you really are Pinkie Pie…"

"Sparkler?" Pinkie exclaimed.

"That nickname hasn't been used for me in a long time."

The mauve unicorn that was a teenager where Pinkie came from was now a full-grown mare, and probably older than she was. Her mane and tail were trimmed short, but still had those rebellious little spike tips in her bangs like she wore as a teenager.

The magenta magic around her was still brimming, and she approached Pinkie slowly. "I overheard all of it, that you're a Pinkie from another universe. I don't know if I buy that…"

"She's telling the truth, Star," Colgate insisted. "You know I would be able to detect the signs of Astral Plane touches."

"You are very good, teach," Amethyst said, her eyes still locked on Pinkie, "but she is causing problems, and I'm worried for our safety-"

"Auntie Pinkie?"

Another unicorn pushed her way through the crowd, a gray-blue mare with slightly uneven golden eyes. Though Amethyst tried to push her back, the young lady was determined to see Pinkie. Her eyes came more into focus when they met Pinkie's, and they stared at each other.

Pinkie Pie might not have recognized her because she had her mane in a bushy ponytail. She might not have recognized her, since where she came from, this mare that was about her age was still a foal. But nothing could stop her from recognizing those semi-off pupils, or that voice so full of warmth.

"Dinky?" Pinkie exclaimed.

"Auntie Pinkie!"

Before Amethyst could stop her little sister, the mare lunged at Pinkie and hugged her as best she could. Dinky Hooves's tight hugs had been the stuff of legend in Ponyville, and they hadn't diminished in this world's time. Pinkie returned the hug with one forearm, and the unicorn nuzzled into the pink pony.

"It's you, there's no mistaking it," Dinky said, parting the hug to look at Pinkie again. "I mean, you may not be our Pinkie… but you're Pinkie, good Pinkie! Auntie Pinkie!"

"Guess she had that entitle habit in this universe too," Pinkie thought, feeling a tear trickle down her cheek. Dinky, where she came from, would nickname mares and stallions that were friends of her mother Auntie and Uncle. It had been adorable, but confusing for Derpy's family reunions.

"You two look so wonderful," Pinkie said, glancing between the two mares. Amethyst glanced away while Dinky beamed with pride. Pinkie checked out Dinky's flank, which sported a smiley faced sun. "And I always knew you'd get a Cutie Mark like that; you always did bring sunshine and warmth into ponies' days!"

Dinky giggled, reminding Pinkie much more of the foal she had in her universe. It still boggled her mind that Dinky was now as big as her, turned out to such a sweet mare.

"This is so great, I'm so happy to see you both," Pinkie gushed. She surveyed the area, asking, "Where's Derpy? Is she here too?"

Dinky's megawatt smile instantly turned into a visage of pain and sorrow. Pinkie noticed most of the ponies around her were also showing sorrow or frustration, some even fear. Marigold scowled darkly, while Lyra approached Pinkie.

"There's something you should know." Lyra's golden eyes were heavy with sorrow. "Derpy… two years ago, she was taken from us."

"She's… she's dead?" Pinkie whimpered.

"No, worse," Marigold muttered. "She's a member of that cult now."

"My mother would never," Amethyst shouted, "join the Cult of Laughter willingly!"

She reared on Marigold, who rolled her eyes. "You may be fully grown, Amethyst, and you may be Colgate's apprentice, but you still have a lot of reality to learn. Sometimes, family just turns wrong. During these times, you're going to have to accept it."

"I never will! They did something to her!"

"Listen, child-"

"Stop calling me that, you stupid-"

"Enough, stop this," Dinky declared. "We cannot argue about this any more! Whatever the reason my mother is with them now, it's not worth fighting each other for. You know we can be trusted, Marigold."

The orange mare scoffed, and turned away. "I've really had enough of this. All that's happened is trouble, ever since she showed up." She glared at Pinkie, and then added, "I suggest we all make sure we get something to eat and take care of the children, before we're forced to start digging again. Digging early because of her."

She trotted off, her coltfriend close behind, trying to reason with her. Most of the herd of ponies broke off, some mad, some confused, some just plain neutral; after all, they were used to this world being unfair and unpredictable. Snoogle headed off after Lyra treated his lip with a quick healing spell.

Amethyst and Dinky stayed with Pinkie, and her four friends. The older of the Hooves sisters was staring at the party pony with confusion, and then her eyes started to mist over. "Pinkie, is that really you?" she asked, gingerly approaching her.

"I am Pinkamena Diane Pie, Pinkie Pie, the Pinkster, and all that and a bag of potato chips," Pinkie said cheerfully. "And though this isn't my world, I would like to think that I can still be your friends."

Amethyst smiled a tiny bit. "Am I… older than you? That's rather interesting."

"It sure is! I just hope you won't rub it in too much."

Dinky clapped her hooves, giggling. It was amazing how much she still carried her foal-like habits, but still appeared as a mature mare. "Yay! We'll help you get all better! Lyra is teaching me healing magic, maybe I can help?"

Lyra nuzzled Dinky, saying, "You are most welcome to, but never forget what your special talents are, my dear."

Pinkie glanced down at herself, then back at the others. "Well, I refuse to be a burden here. Tell me what I can do to help-"

"You're kidding, right?" Berry exclaimed. "Ya got three good hooves, one eye, you're still low on blood and such, and-"

"Details, details!" The partier swished her tail about as she said this. "Now, tell me what I can do to help."

"I'll tell you what," Bonbon said. "Soon, we have to head out to do some more digging. Most of us will have to go, but why don't we leave Dinky with you?"

"Will that be okay? Maim won't notice she's gone, will he?"

Amethyst's eyes hardened. "I don't care if he does, I don't want her anywhere near her. The less time she's around where he is, the better."

Pinkie nodded, getting a vague and uncomfortable idea of what that was about. She glanced at the others, who all nodded in agreement.

In a half-hour, a loud work bell was rung, and the ponies all left their homes to head west. Pinkie and Dinky watched them go, as Lyra gave one more check to the former's injuries. After they left, Dinky motioned for her to sit down next to her.

"If you are from another world, you probably have many questions," Dinky said. "I'll try to answer them best."

"First off, what do you all do here? I mean, archaeology? Digging?"

The blue-gray unicorn nodded, her ponytail bobbing from the motion. "Yes, Mistress Rarity is obsessed with finding out history, especially of Princess Platinum and other famous unicorns. We think she wants to convince unicorns all over Equestria that they should join Whitegold, and not Moon & Star."

"Have you found anything yet?"

"Yes, one thing, but we've kept it a secret," Dinky whispered, her eyes glinting with rebellious impishness. "We don't want the diamond dogs to take it as a souvenir, which they've done more than once. They're really greedy."

Pinkie nodded, thinking of her own experience with diamond dogs. "And Dinky… I'm so sorry about your mother. But if it means anything," she smiled for her, "I think I agree with your sister. I doubt Derpy would do anything to hurt any pony."

Dinky's eyes grew heavy with sorrow, but she managed a small smile. "I believe it too, but it's so hard when so many ponies you grew up with… so many you looked up to and admired… became something so cruel and so much not like what they were… like your friends, Auntie Pinkie. Like my own friends."

She stared at the floor, so downcast that her ears were flattened against her head. "There's so many ponies from Ponyville that have become something terrible, Pinkie, and that's just the ones we know about officially in House Whitegold. My mother was one of the most wonderful ponies there is, but this world… it's changed so many of us."

"Your mother is a gentle soul who loves her daughters," Pinkie insisted. "She wouldn't join a cruel group, especially without you two."

"Pinkie, before you came to this world by accident, could you ever imagine your friends being evil?"

That stunned the party pony into silence. It broke Dinky's heart to see Pinkie like that; she remembered as a foal, she thought nothing in all of Equestria could make her Auntie Pinkie stop talking. Now she had done it with a sentence.

"I don't know where most ponies from Ponyville are now, if they survived the flood… oh, did Lyra and Bonbon tell you?"

"Yes, they did."

"Well, my only classmate who traveled with us and stayed on the good side was Twist. She's here in this town."

"Wait, what about Doctor Whooves?"

Dinky smiled a little more at the mention of the brown earth stallion. "He's in Manehattan, he wasn't chosen for this expedition. Usually he is allowed to come, but there were some… problems in The Undercity, and he volunteered to stay."

The unicorn's eyes turned wistful as she stared out the window. "He's… doing okay, but he was hit hard by Mom joining the Cult. Amethyst and I call him Dad from time to time, because he's been around to help us. Hard to not call somepony who's been that protective and caring about you Dad…"

Pinkie nodded, and, with the knowledge that Dinky's father figure was okay, continued to question. "Anypony else I might know here?"

"Besides the ones you've met so far, there's Twinkleshine, Bright Idea, and a few others that I will try to remember, but you'll probably recognize them sooner."

"That Marigold pony, she somehow seems familiar… who is she?"

"She's Roseluck's sister."

Pinkie thought to her flower loving friend at Ponyville, with her fittingly flower named friends Lily and Daisy. "Where is she? Roseluck?"

"It's pretty well known by now that she's in with House Everfree. Marigold took the news so hard, she really has no one left except Dandy Skies."

"Who's that?"

"Her coltfriend, the stallion that was standing near her with that mob. It's taken a great deal of effort to allow him to stay here. Pegasi aren't normally allowed at mining towns."

"Even if they're family or friends?"

"Mining towns aren't made with consideration in mind.

"Pinkie, there's something you've got to understand." Dinky glanced out a window, as if surveying Equestria. "This is a cruel world now. You don't pull your weight, you might end up dead."

Pinkie nodded, then asked, "It's like a whole new world out there… like a picture of Equestria, drawn by somepony with a wicked, wickedly sense."

"Many call the world now Equestria Divided. This is a war-torn world now: racial supremacy between earth ponies, pegasi and unicorns, sadistic monsters, nature trying to dominate civilization, and money and power more important than anything else."

Pinkie hung her head, and repeated the new name. "Equestria Divided." She too glanced out the window, and sighed heavily. "The thought of Ponyville divided is hard enough to accept. The whole world… it seems hard to believe."

"For me too."

Dinky then placed her hoof on Pinkie's shoulder, then let started to cast a healing spell. Golden magic radiated from her horn, and around Pinkie's head. A soothing, but slightly prickly, feeling came to the party pony's two major injuries.

It felt strange, as she could literally feel it in her bones. Her eye socket felt like some kind of carousel, the healing magic swirling around. Pinkie hissed in air at the peculiar feeling, then sighed contentedly.

"You don't have to waste your energy," she assured Dinky.

"It's perfectly fine, I get better when practicing," the gray unicorn explained. "When I first started, I could barely heal a scratch. Now, I'm getting close to helping with emergencies."

"So you've been leveling up your healing ability? That's great," Pinkie said, smiling at her. "Wow, you have grown up so well, Dinky. Thank you… for everything."

The rest of the day was rather uneventful, Pinkie fell asleep after the healing treatment from Dinky. The diamond dogs were rougher, mostly because Maim had worked them up and warned them that the ponies were feeling rebellious. The ponies were very agitated by the end of the day, aching from how much hard labor they were put through.

Lyra and Bonbon helped to calm them all down before curfew was put into effect. Dinky and Colgate watched over Pinkie, as the latter used the rest of her energy to teach Dinky a couple healing spells.

The next day, Pinkie woke up, and was determined to help out; however, most of the ponies didn't want her to be near the mines. It was a combination of those that feared she would just get them in more trouble, and those that didn't want to see her hurt by the brutal guards. Pinkie didn't seem to care that she was still three-legged and one-eyed, she just wanted to help her new friends.

Thus, Colgate took control of the situation. "Listen, I know many of you are anxious, so let me just escort our friend. We will mine for gems and artifacts today, as usual, and we will do our best not to rile the diamond dogs.

"We've been here for a long while now, and we haven't that much longer until we head back to Manehattan. You've all trusted my judgement so far, and so I ask you to trust me further. I know you all are still confused and a little bitter about yesterday, but let's just all remember that we've survived a Tartarus-lot of trouble. We'll keep on enduring."

Most of the ponies nodded, though some were still staring at Pinkie Pie, Marigold among them. Dandy Skies led her away, whispering to her to calm down. The orange-'n-yellow mare shot a glare at Pinkie, suspicion in her eyes.

Dinky left with a group of her friends, a combination of ponies that Pinkie either knew or didn't. Twist was one of them, all grown up and looking rather strong; she still wore glasses, and her mane and tail had unruly curls, but she was strong and lively. Dinky and Twist began to talk immediately, with the red-maned earth pony glancing back at Pinkie until they were out of sight.

"Pinkie, there's something we'd like to see," Lyra said. She, along with Amethyst, Bonbon, and Colgate. "See, we told you about how we find something deep down here?"

"Yep yep yep, I do!"

"We'd like to show it to you. It's… kind of important to us, and we know that if you are Pinkie Pie, you are good at keep secrets."

Pinkie nodded, a serious expression on her face. "You all are my friends, and thus I would rather die than release a secret. Because secrets are like promises: once you break them, the damage will be there forever."

"Exactly," Amethyst said. "And we wouldn't want that to happen-"

"FOREVER," Pinkie exclaimed, raising her good foreleg as she shook her hoof up at the sky. "AND EVER!"

"Yep, she's Pinkie, no doubt," Bonbon said, shaking her head though a small smile was on her face.

The four of them led Pinkie through the shanty town, and thus she had a better look at what her friends were living in. And Pinkie was never known for swearing or foul language, but this place was total crap.

The buildings were all barely propped up, holes in the walls and ceilings. Most everything was set outside, and Pinkie could only guess that the needed furniture, like beds and stoves, took up all the room in the small houses.

The worst part was the huge lack of green. Everything just looked dirty, the dirt even appeared to be dirty, if that made sense (it did in Pinkie's mind). Dirt was something that was where grass grew, where life bloomed, not something that was regarded as dust.

Pinkie hated to think her friends lived here. No wonder they seemed so tired.

Diamond dogs were walking around the town, like guards monitoring prisoners. Maim marched by, and stared down Pinkie Pie. "I'm watching you," he snarled. "You'd better watch your flank, because any excuse, I'll sink my teeth into your neck."

Pinkie shivered, biting her bottom lip. After the large diamond dog had walked past them, Lyra pat her shoulder. "Just try to avoid him," she instructed, "and he won't be able to do anything."

After another minute of walking, they approached what Colgate said was the main entrance to the mines. It was a large hole with wooden beams propping up the dirt over the slanted pathway. They started to head down into the earth, with lanterns lighting the way.

Pinkie could tell the lanterns were alight by regular candles rather than magic flame. She wondered why it wasn't the latter, maybe they couldn't afford the special kind of lantern that holds magic.

The mines were like a large cavern down under the earth, a deep cavern running through the center with pathways leading further down to other digs in the deep. Large wooden and metal beams were supporting the ceiling, and all the walkways lit by lanterns.

Earth ponies and unicorns were digging into the walls, using pickaxes and chisels. They were removing small gems here and there, pitching their finds in buckets by their sides. Pegasi were following some of them around when they traveled to the lower areas, carrying lanterns as they hovered by their partners.

Diamond dogs were patrolling around the walkways, staring at the work being done. Sometimes they would take a full buckets of gems, replacing it with an empty bucket for the pony to start filling up again. Once in a while, they popped a gem into their mouths.

Pinkie Pie noticed that none of the diamond dogs were being polite, not in the least. None of them complimented the ponies or supportive, they were all frowning or even snarling at the miners. One of them snapped at the quintet as they trotted by.

"Okay, why are they even here?" Pinkie asked Colgate. "They just seem so mean."

"Well, they're here for security, to sniff out spies," Colgate explained. "Technically, we are an operation for House Whitegold, and thus, we need to make sure no one is stealing or spying."

"Diamond dogs are really good at sniffing out spies," Bonbon said, gesturing to one of the said dogs. "Members of the other houses really do have distinct smells, something they aren't really aware of because only dogs are good at identifying the smells."

Amethyst Star nodded, and lit her horn for illumination along the pathway, waving off a pegasus who had hovered by. The light purple unicorn sighed as she said, "I know it's hard to imagine, Pinkie, but we do live in a dangerous state. House Whitegold doesn't have the strongest military, and we are an expendable expedition."

Pinkie nodded slowly, glancing around the underground caverns. They were venturing deeper down into the earth, the pathway becoming more dark; however, Sparkler kept it illuminated well enough for them all to see.

"But even though we work for House Whitegold," Lyra said, her face darkened with an angry frown, "we're not holding any loyalty to it, or its leader."

"Wait, I'm a little confused," Pinkie said, glancing around her to make sure no one, pony or dog, was nearby. "I understand why you don't want to support Rarity, and the House, but isn't that a bad idea? If you don't supply them, the other houses could come and kill you all."

"We're not diminishing House Whitegold, because sadly, that's all we have," Colgate explained. "But what we're doing is not giving the House luxuries. Like what we're about to show you."

As they walked through the tunnel, passing by miners and guards all along the way, Pinkie tried to consider all this. It was still baffling her to think of Rarity like this, even if this wasn't her Rarity.

The walk stopped midway through, at an intersection with the right way boarded off with several planks of wood. Lyra led the way, squeezing in underneath the bottom planks, which looked high up enough to let a pony move under without a major problem.

Pinkie was the exception, having to wriggle underneath on three legs. The others helped her, then they carried on down the lantern-less corridor. Amethyst amped up her light spell, allowing them to see where they were going.

At the end of the tunnel was a large, circular room, one that was hard to see even with the illumination spell being broadcast. Amethyst picked up a lantern had been left, and channeled her magic into it.

This spell, amplified by the magic lantern, caused the entire room to be bathed in a warm glow. Pinkie then realized it wasn't a room or a hollowed out corridor, it was a tomb.

The stone was carved into images of ponies in armor, some of them standing at attention and some in battle poses. In the center of the wall was a sarcophagus, with a couple stands set up on top of it. Pinkie approached the resting place, and found a plaque in front of it.

'Honor Bound. There never was, and probably never will be, another being dedicated to home and family.
- Princess Luna.'

The party pony blinked, then glanced back at the others. "Wait, is this a soldier's tomb? For this war?"

"No, it's much, much older than that," Bonbon said. "You know anything about the history of Equestria?"

"We haven't had a war or major conflict in many, many years. Is this from a warrior in one of those past conflicts?" she asked, admiring the craftsmanship of the coffin. Her attention was then set on the two rather magnificent items.

"Honor Bound's tomb was discovered by us a few weeks ago, and we kept it secret from the diamond dogs," Colgate said, walking over to Pinkie, who stared with bright, blue eyes at the two objects. "Burrow XXVII is the first place we found something like this."

Pinkie was still mesmerized by what was placed upon the coffin, gleaming in Amethyst's light spell as if they had just been polished. The first object was a curved scabbard, a dark red with decals of the sun on one side, the moon on the other. The handle was a sturdy fabric, dyed light blue and yellow.

The second object was a helmet, also colored light blue for the dome, and goldenrod for the trimmings, including the rim that led into large horns curved up and pointed back.

"Both have been enchanted," Colgate said to Pinkie, beaming with a bit of pride. "I can detect them, took a little while to analyze them. Among some of the enchants, the most unique is the indestructible enchant on them, which is extremely hard to cast; even nowadays, it's almost impossible to find the mats and power.

"I was a bit of a history enthusiast, and Bonbon knows a little bit too."

"Well, my family history is said to go back to great warriors of our past," Bonbon explained, shrugging nonchalantly. "I don't know if it's true, but I doubt it; if they were, I would have fought the good fight a long time ago."

Lyra used her own magic to levitate the sword in its scabbard, the mint green aura unsheathing the blade. Pinkie watched with rapt attention as the curved bladed gleamed in Amethyst's light, a glorious steel that almost hummed when free.

"We found these in the tomb, the katana and the helmet were set next to the coffin," Lyra explained. "They're so beautiful, but fighting with a sword is something none of us know how to do."

Amethyst nodded solemnly at this. "It really takes a unicorn to fight with a blade like this; ponies of old times, so Colgate tells me, were very adapt at fighting while wielding a weapon in the fore hooves."

Pinkie blinked at this, then glanced at Lyra. "Is that what you meant you talked about those funny creatures that had hands, like minotaurs?"

"Huh? No, that's something else."

The mint-colored unicorn levitated the sword in front of Pinkie, letting her examine it up-close. "See, ponies of ancient times, as Bonbon tells me, had to adjust to the monsters they were fighting. All ponies have trouble when it comes to real combat. Well, they did until Equestria Divided became a full-blown war zone."

Bonbon arched an eyebrow at her lover. "Pinkie and I are surrounded by unicorns, and you're saying combat is hard for everypony? C'mon, Lyra, you girls are the only ones who can use that thing. Hooves cannot hold a sword."

It was then that Pinkie took the sword's grip in her good fore hoof. She held it, like she would do any other object, especially like she would a pastry: careful and delicate, but firm and balanced. Lyra's magic hold on the sword vanished when she saw Pinkie take the katana.

"Ooo," was all the party pony could say at first. She grinned, like a foal who had been given a great present. Glancing at all the others, who stared in wonder, she asked, "So, to be like a real samurai… that's what they were called, weren't they?"

"Yes, that's right," Bonbon said.

"I remember that, from the tour I had of Canterlot Castle…"

Pinkie's mane drooped a little, and she sighed. "It feels like a long time ago, that day… and it's only really been a few days."

Before she could let the sorrow overwhelm her, she shook it off and declared, "No! I won't let the saddy-waddy feelings get me down! Let's see if I can be like an ancient warrior of the past…

"Ancient Warrior Pinkie Pie… Activate!"

And thus, Pinkie stood up on her hind legs, balancing herself like a bipedal creature. The party pony had done this before in the past, something like, most everything she had done, was just for recreation, fun, and just being herself. Now she was doing it for something greater than that.

It was probably the most ridiculous thing that one could see. A one-eyed pony with one of her forelegs in a sling, standing on her hind legs, holding a katana blade in her fore hoof, wasn't something one would ever expect to see. Then again, it was Pinkie Pie.

"Huzzah," the pink party pony exclaimed, as the others boggled at her. "I am a samurai now! I am WHOA!"

She wobbled on her hind legs and fell on her back. As the others bolted to her side, she called out, "I'm alright, I'm alright! I fall down all the time!"

"You really shouldn't push yourself, Pinkie," Bonbon chastised her. "You're still not in the best of shape."

"Then I will get into shape," she boldly declared from the floor. "This'll be my physical therapy! I'll teach myself how to walk and fight like a samurai."

"First off," Lyra patiently said, "that's not exactly what physical therapy is. Second, why do you want to be a samurai?"

"I told you, I didn't want to be useless. Besides, it gives me something to do.

"I have chosen a class," Pinkie announced, sitting up on her haunches. Raising Honor Bound's katana up in the air with her good foreleg, she said with pride, "Pinkie Pie, level one samurai, has entered this world!"

The other ponies blinked and stared, and Bonbon leaned over to whisper to Lyra, "Why is it that the less sense she makes, the more I'm convinced she's fine?"

Lyra couldn't help but giggle. "You know what? That reminds me of the days back in Ponyville, when I was friends with Pinkie, and you always wondered why… oh for those times."

The minty unicorn sighed in nostalgia, then nuzzled Bonbon. "You know what? Let us not be puzzled by Pinkie's antics, let us just enjoy them. And help her out, she's our friend now."

Bonbon nuzzled back, but protested, "But… become a samurai? Is she planning on starting an uprising?"

"No," Pinkie said, popping up between the two. She was now suddenly wearing Honor Bound's helmet, it bouncing slightly as she hadn't put on the chin strap, and her poofy mane was almost like balancing it on a spring. "What I want to do is not be useless! And thus, I'll learn how to defend my friends from any threat!"

"That's a sword, Pinkie, not a shield," Amethyst pointed out. "That is a tool solely made to harm and kill. That blade can cut through stone, I've tried it before."

Pinkie Pie, now sitting down, ran her eyes up the blade, almost going cross-eyed at one point. "Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that. But as long as I am here, I should try to adapt to this world."

"Are you ready to kill somepony?" Colgate asked, her voice stern.

"Are any of you?" Pinkie fired back just as strong. "You all told me this is a dangerous, violent world. Do you have to kill to protect the ones you love?"

This question caught them off-balance, as they exchanged glances. Lyra bit her bottom lip, then spoke for all of them, "That's true, Pinkie… none of us are ready. Only one of us has had to kill somepony."

Pinkie's mane drooped at this, her mane reflecting the same sorrow that was in her eyes. "Which one of you?"

"Not one of us four," Colgate admitted. "It was Berry Punch."

"It happened the night," Amethyst emotionally recalled, "Pinchy was taken from us. When we were all in the Undercity, some bandits raided our side of town. Pony traffickers, the ones that want to take ponies and make them slaves or harem girls… or worse, worse than we can imagine."

"They like to take children," Bonbon grumbled. "We don't know if it's Manehattan and House Whitegold, or some other nefarious group… they may be a neutral, evil force, for all we know. But it was about a year after we settled into Manehattan, that this happened."

"The raiders came at night, and took some of the children," Amethyst continued. "They tried to take Dinky, but Doctor Whooves fended them off. When two of them took Pinchy, Berry killed one of them. She bashed his head in."

Pinkie thought to Berry Punch, the one of this universe. She had seemed herself, though definitely older; now the lines under her eyes made more sense, she had been aged by grief more than time.

Berry Punch, in Pinkie's world, had always been a merry drunk, except for when her little sister would visit. Like most pony families, the parents would sometimes let the kids go and live with siblings who had moved out. This was in the hope they would learn more about the real world and careers they could embark on. Sweetie Belle would normally stay at Rarity's, and sometimes Bellamina would visit Pinkie or Octavia.

It was hard to tell, at first glance, what Pinchy could learn from Berry. Though the older mare was lovable and fun, she had some bad habits, like getting sloshed consistently, sleeping with stallions and mares she barely knew, and having a large collection of drinks at home.

Still, Berry never partook in these activities when her sister was over. Everypony in Ponyville made sure to not mention it to Pinchy either, though they had problems with schoolmates trying to be cruel (Apple Bloom had wound up in a fight with Diamond Tiara when the spoiled filly had tried to tell Pinchy).

This protective side of Berry, her mature side, made everypony realize what a good pony she was. And now…

"Pinchy is gone?" Pinkie asked sadly.

"We have no idea where she is, and it's been… years," Lyra admitted. "We looked, we searched, we even saved up enough money to hire a mercenary and a ticket into Inner Manehattan. But we came up with nothing."

"Berry almost drank herself to death when a year's worth of searching turned up nothing," Bonbon admitted. "We managed, well, Colgate mostly, to pull her out of it, and she's now sober. Even if she wanted to drink, it's such a luxury now, it's like your cupcakes: we haven't had any in years."

Pinkie plopped down on her plot, staring down at the floor. Her new helmet tilted down over her eyes, covering her tears. This world kept producing more sadistic changes to the friends she loved. "Pinchy, Tavi, Vinyl, Derpy… all missing," she muttered bitterly. "So many ponies I love… it's like every one you mention is another horror story."

"I know it's hard for you, Pinkie," Bonbon said, "but you've just been told this story. We're living it."

"Not anymore," Pinkie said, tilting her helmet back up. She focused her one good eye, and stated, "This is now my story. I'm here, and there's nothing I can do about it. So I'm going to do my best to make everypony here smile again!"

"It's a nice thought," Colgate said, "but there's little to smile about anymore, Pinkie."

"There's always something to smile about," she boldly declared. "Since I've been here, I've been slashed, amputated, beaten, threatened, and witnessed ponies die! And yet I smile for you all, because I know that somehow, someway, I'll make you all happy!

"Amethyst," Pinkie rounded on said unicorn, making Sparkler jump slightly at being addressed, "you keep being awesome! You have kept your sister safe, and she's as wonderful of a treasure as she was when she was a filly who hugged your leg until the blood circulation was cut off. Be proud!"

Despite the strange analogy, Amethyst smiled over the thought of how her sister was. Pinkie turned to Colgate next. "You and I both know that it might take a miracle and then some to get me home. So for now, I'm gonna make it my goal to get your dentistry back in business, because I'm gonna be making sweets for all the ponies!

"And you two!" Pinkie turned, head first and then body twirling along after her, "I wanna see you kiss! If you've been a couple for," she quickly mentally counted, "nineteen years, eight months, two weeks, and three days! That's how long it has been, adding the sixteen years of this place. So I wanna see you two embrace and kiss!"

Bonbon didn't blush easily, but now she was. She glanced from side to side, not sure if she wanted to do semi-public displays of affection. It didn't matter though, because a pair of mint hooves cupped her face, turned her towards a pair of mint-green lips, and embraced her in a passionate kiss. After a single second of surprise and uncertainty, Bonbon returned it.

Pinkie watched, solely out of the emotional message it was sending. There was a whole story to these two, this Lyra and Bonbon, that hadn't been told yet to her. But here, Pinkie could see the love, the gratitude, and the strength they had for each other. After the kiss was finished, Pinkie squee'd in delight.

"That's settled," she exclaimed in delight. "I will practice physical therapy here in Honor Bound's tomb, away from nasty diamond dog patrols, and will spread smiles across the mining expedition! Pinkie Pie has accepted the quest!"

As she stated this and grinned merrily, a rather unusual sound effect played from nowhere. The other four ponies looked around, but Pinkie was back to talking.

"Let us all do our best to cheer up our friends, and make this expedition as safe and fun as possible!"

She sheathed Honor Bound's sword, then stuck her good fore hoof out. "Agreed?"

Lyra reacted first, putting her mint green hoof on top of Pinkie's pink hoof. "Agreed," she said, smiling so much, she felt like old times, prancing about Ponyville.

Bonbon, also feeling the same mirth but hiding it a little, stuck her yellow hoof in. "I'm all for it."

Amethyst's purple hoof came in next, followed by Colgate's blue hoof. "And I'm sure Dinky and Berry will join us," Colgate stated with a smile, "as well as others!"

As they raised their hooves up high in the air, Pinkie cheered. Despite everything, it made her happy to be with friends, to call some place her home. This is where she would make her stand.


And stand she did. Over the next following days, Pinkie Pie dedicated herself to others, and the effects spread like wildfire across the camp. After at least a week, smiles were all around the dig site.

It started off slow, as Pinkie was still recovering from her injuries. Dinky and Lyra put a great deal of healing energy into her leg, and in a day and a half, she could stand on it. Tender and stiff, Pinkie was slow to walk on it at first. Her eye was also being taken care of, but to her, being able to pronk ahead was the most important part.

Pinkie's first step began when a caravan of supplies wheeled into town. These caravans were known for traveling to the more peaceful parts of Equestria Divided, selling all kinds of things to outsiders of the Houses. Normally, Burrow XXVII just bought things from them like clothes, medicine, and blankets. And since they charged a lot, it had been next to impossible to get any luxuries; Burrow XXVII was barely paid for this work by House Whitegold.

Despite the lack of bits and being a stranger in a new world, Pinkie Pie had her bargaining skills. A combination of cheer, work, bartering, and a slight bit of dishonesty and risk helped her almost fill the house she and Colgate were sharing.

It had been a risk to smuggle some gems out of the mines and to the caravan, but Pinkie's mane was perfect for hiding things from the diamond dogs. Even when they had searched her sometimes, they never found anything in there.

Despite lacking the normal party tools, like confetti, punch bowls, and balloons, Pinkie improvised. She tore up propaganda leaflets to make her own celebration confetti, turned a curved shield into a punch bowl, and prepared drinks and food from the materials she could purchase.

Soon, she had started a small farm, growing grain and rocks (the latter no pony understood) so that she could bake her own goods in the future. Now, with the sugar and flour and other materials she bought from the caravan, she could make cakes, bread, muffins, punch, and other food items that she had learned from the Cakes.

Dinky almost broke into tears when Pinkie made her a muffin. The gray unicorn gave her such a tight, grateful hug, that it reminded Pinkie of how Dinky could hug as a filly. Amethyst had to help pry her off Pinkie, but the older of the two sisters was near tears as well.

All of the ponies ate the food in secret at first, but then Pinkie Pie approached the diamond dogs. Cautious, she started with the ones that hadn't been so awful, like Snoogle. The dogs loved the sugary treats the most, and slowly but surely, more of the dogs stopped being so nasty and would even be pleasant. It was more enjoyable, for everyone, that they would get along and enjoy their surroundings.

Twist had been a big help preparing treats. Her candy confection talent had been a huge plus for Pinkie, and thus the two of them, plus Dinky, set out to make candy as well. This was such a huge hit, a party was held, hosted by the ponies in general rather than Pinkie.

"After my family and I left Ponyville," Twist had told Pinkie, "I haven't made any candy since then… I forgot how much I missed it."

Twist still had a trace of her lisp from when she was a filly, more pronounced she was emotional. Dinky hugged her red-maned friend as Twist sobbed great tears of joy. The two of them made matching candy canes later on, to cheer themselves up.

Pinkie Pie also started to sod the ground around Burrow XXVII, around the slapdash houses. The diamond dogs had once been against such a thing, preferring dirt and rocks, but Pinkie's treats had made the majority of them go with the ponies on this. Grass soon bloomed, and everypony's hooves felt relaxed when trotting on the soft blades of green.

When the caravan had a large shipment of paint, discovered in an abandoned factory, Pinkie was rather curious. "Why would they leave all this paint behind?"

"Well, House Earthborn doesn't always consider loss when they have to beat a tactical retreat," the leader of the caravan, a mare by the name of Silver Salvage, explained as she adjusted her glasses. She pat the side of one of the wagons, and said, "We make really good hauls every time they retreat, no other House does such a thing. Though it's still risky, so we are going to charge a lot for it, Miss Pink."

(Pinkie Pie had simply gone by the name "Pink" to the caravan and the diamond dogs, just to ensure no one would relate her to the Laughing Mare. "My parents were real lazy," she would say, then grin and say, "but we were happy!")

Pinkie Pie was studying the cans of paint, giggling as her train of thought arrived at an interesting stop. "Oh, I have a great idea what to do with all this paint, but I could use some help."

"Gonna hire us again?" Salvage asked, quirking an eyebrow. "Well, if it's a paint job, the price will be higher than last time."

"Bigger?"

"Much bigger." A sly grin spread across her face. "Can you afford it?"

"You doubt my potential?" Pinkie replied with an equally sly grin on her face.

Burrow XXVII rocked that night a wonderful party. A record player, bought by Pinkie, played tunes as ponies danced, laughed, ate, and drink. Some diamond dogs even joined in with the games and festivities.

Berry Punch had been offered some fermented cider by Silver Salvage, but the magenta mare turned it down. Colgate had seen this from afar, and felt a great relief off her chest.

"I thought for sure you would go back to drinking if offered," Colgate thought as she watched Berry dance with another pony. "Thank you for proving me wrong."

Most of Pinkie's games, due to no supplies and lack of mats for more material games, were now improv games. Trying to guess who mysterious dates were, insane party guests, forced to speak in questions only, and other games played with only imagination and a quick wit were enjoyed by all.

That night, Pinkie Pie, the caravan, and numerous ponies painted all the houses of Burrow XXVII. With names and funny pictures scribed on the buildings, the dig site's shanty town now was more like a "pantry" town, which was how Pinkie liked to describe it.

Even Marigold had lightened up for the most part, but she was still slightly wary of Pinkie. She wasn't the only pony, not all of the equine had fully warmed up to the partying, but none of them would say that it had made anything worse.

The children of Burrow XXVII loved it. They had something to do that was fun and safe, the adults were happy, and they couldn't get enough of the tasty food Pinkie made. Always one to care for children, the party pony took to watching over the kids, especially a couple friendly ones named Bird Chirp and Bounce.

The only major problem was a small number of diamond dogs that refused to ever take part in the parties. And worst of all was Maim.

Maim was the opposite of his fellow diamond dogs, in that the more happy things were, the more angry he was. He would start fights with ponies and dogs for little to no reason, and since he was so big, this would result in his victim left bloody and bruised.

Mares, stallions, and dogs all had to go to Lyra and Dinky, or had to be brought there, whenever Maim had a violent reaction to anything. Ponies had tried to avoid him, to not smile around him, but it was impossible to tell what would set him off.

Since he wasn't alone, there was no stopping him. Plus, the diamond dogs who were the head of Burrow XXVII in a management respect were more on his side than the ponies. Messengers from Manehattan would receive reports from these dogs, not the workers.

Maim had attacked Pinkie Pie several times, but with her four legs all fine, she was able to avoid being struck often. She had been hit by him several times, but managed to walk it off. Her friends were all concerned, but she took it in stride rather well.

What wasn't being taken well was how Maim treated the foals and fillies. More than once, he had assaulted a young pony, striking them hard and threatening to eat them, or worse. The first time this happened, it was with Bird Chirp.

Marigold had forgotten all sense of proportion and attacked Maim, resulting in her spending the rest of the day being treated by Lyra; it wasn't in vain, Chirp was safe. The next time, several ponies and Snoogle stood up to Maim and forced him to back off.

"We've always been careful to not let him near the foals, but he's truly overdoing it this time," Colgate whispered to her friends. Her eyes narrowed, and she added, "He's becoming more daring with his cruelty, and I don't like it."

Colgate's suspicion was amplified when Maim started carrying around blades around with him. Crude daggers and a cleaver were kept in stitched-on sheathes on his belt, some of them stained with blood. If a pony would stare, he would grin wickedly and threaten them with it.

"I killed me some wild animal for dinners," he once said to Amethyst and Dinky. "Want to be my dinners tonight? My cleaver's freshly sharpened."

At first, it had all seemed like a new intimidation tactic. But when a party one night was broken up when Maim came stomping in, swinging his cleaver wildly. Every pony and dog was then terrified of Maim and what he was truly capable of.

Luckily, no one had been hurt on this rampage, but the diamond dog managers were not going to punish or restrict Maim. As far as they were concerned, he was keeping the workers in line, stopping them from partying too much and keeping to their responsibilities.

"Frankly, there is much discussion," one of the diamond dog managers said to Amethyst Star, using words that she was sure were outside his vocabulary range with how he was using them, "that you ponies has been shirking responsibility and being lax, not doing your jobs!"

"You shouldn't be so quick to dismiss our efforts with how you all stand," Amethyst boldly retorted.

The diamond dog manager snarled. "How dare you! What makes you thinks we no know our job?"

Without breaking eye contact, Amethyst pointed behind the manager she was talking to, to another diamond dog manager: he was using a report paper as a mat for a quick number one break.

"Damn it, Leaker," the first manager shouted, "you promised us you no do thats anymore!"

Maim had no limitations, and took to smacking or hitting ponies who were on or off work. Lyra and Dinky were busy healing most of the time, while Pinkie tried to keep up their enthusiasm.

"I'm sorry it's come to this," she apologized to Bonbon, who was being treated for a scratch and bruise on her flank where Maim had hit her. "I know some of you think that he's more violent because I'm here-"

"Don't blame yourself for what that creep does," Bonbon quickly cut her off. "You can spend your whole life blaming yourself, Pinkie, but never forget who was truly the one to do it."

"She's right," Lyra, mid-healing spell, agreed. "You didn't hit my Bonny, Maim did. Besides," she nuzzled Pinkie and said with sincerity, "Our lives have picked up since you joined us."

Indeed, ever since Pinkie had joined, she had literally and figuratively painted the town with smiles. Despite Maim and other aggressive diamond dogs, the ponies there had reason to be happy, to have a positive attitude, and to do their job with feeling.

In the background, however, there was a more serious side to Pinkie Pie and her friends. Every day, Pinkie would enter Honor Bound's tomb in secret, and practice the art of a pony samurai. As silly as it seemed at first, the ponies were all rather keen to learn how to defend themselves better, especially when Maim amped up his violent side.

Pinkie would don Honor Bound's helmet, then strap it on. It was a good thing, considering how many times she fell down when practicing her bipedal walk. Pinkie had been rather unbalanced when starting, mostly due to her injuries. Her new forearm had been a small advantage, but her injured eye, which was taking time to heal, was throwing her off.

The new foreleg was something that was still hard to adjust to, as Pinkie could still remember her amputated leg; she had nightmares about it. Still, her new foreleg felt as genuine as her other, natural foreleg. The bio-prosthetic limb felt strong, flexible, and she found it easier to pick up and handle objects with her new hoof.

As soon as she found herself comfortable with the bio-prosthetic limb being truly a part of herself, she practiced using Honor Bound's sword. At first, it was just casual swings and stances. Then she found out how helpful the bio-prosthetic limb was in holding the katana.

"Kind of cheating in a way, I'm sure Honor Bound didn't have a fake limb," Pinkie admitted to Lyra, who was watching her shadow fence with the katana.

"I'm sure Honor Bound wouldn't call foul on you, Pinkie," Lyra assured her playfully. "It's not like his spirit's going to come back and haunt you."

"Maybe if he did, he's more mad that a girl's using it," Pinkie cracked.

Lyra cackled, then lowered her voice to imitate a stallion, " 'I am Honor Bound, the greatest pony samurai there is! I fought dragons and beasts and magical monsters and… hey! A girl's getting her cooties on my sword! Eww, drop it, girls are icky!'"

As Lyra joked, she conjured a magical image of the katana blade, waving it around. "Get off the girl germs, ick ick ick!"

Pinkie and Lyra laughed for a little bit, then the party pony took an interest in Lyra's sword-shaped magic. "How are you doing that?"

"Oh, this? This takes a lot of practice," Lyra said, twirling the magic around. The mint green magic glimmered playfully, despite its sword shape. "Magic is usually used to pick something up, or conjure something, but it takes a lot of effort to have magic form a solid mass all by itself."

"Why's that?"

"Magic needs a basis, something to connect with, it has a symbiotic relationship with the world." Lyra rotated the sword-shaped magic, as if to accent this. "That's why unicorns can cast it, because of how it focuses on our horns. Earth ponies and pegasi feel it in their core, allowing them to do the things we unicorns cannot, like have enormous stamina or fly at top speeds."

Pinkie nodded, and asked, "So, you can form solid objects around nothing if you practice hard enough?"

"Not really around 'nothing,' my magic is condensing air, and all the little particles that float around, naked to our eyes. Condense enough, and you form a solid object. It takes a lot of time, energy, and effort to do something like that."

"You don't seem too concentrated, you're doing it so casually," Pinkie gushed.

Lyra's mint face had a tinge of blush to it, and she glanced to the side. "Well, I've been practicing for years now. It was mostly for fun things… like for times with Bonbon."

"How so?"

Now the unicorn was full-bloom blushing, and she shook her head. "Um, sorry, that's private, Pinkie! Bonbon would kill me if I went into details."

"Oki-doki-loki!"

Pinkie practiced walking on her hind legs more, and Lyra watched in envy. "I've always wanted to do that so effortlessly as you," she admitted.

"Want to practice walking like this with me?"

"No, I cannot," she ruefully admitted. "When I was a filly, I tried that more times than I should have, and one day, I seriously hurt myself when I fell down a flight of stairs. My hips healed alright, but it's very uncomfortable to walk on my hind legs like that any more."

"Oh no," Pinkie exclaimed. "But other than that, you're okay?"

"Well, a lot of times, ponies thought I hit my head harder than I said, because I still wanted to do things that weren't normal. I still like to sit upright, that doesn't hurt to do."

Pinkie giggled, then walked over to Lyra on her hind legs. She posed, and asked, "How do I look?"

"Bravo, Pinkie! Do you want to practice sword fighting?"

"Huh? Do you have a sword?"

"No, but I have this, remember?" Lyra pointed with a hoof to her magic-created sword.

"Oh, can that cut?"

"No, not really. I haven't tried to focus my magic that much, with a blade that it could cut. What I have is the world's dullest sword."

"Then I say to you," Pinkie rubbed her chin, then exclaimed, "On par!"

"I think it's 'en garde', Pinkie!"

On par or en garde, the two began to practice sword fighting. At first, it was all in good fun, then they started to practice as if dueling a real foe. Pinkie was knocked down and bonked by the magic sword several times.

"Am I being too rough?" Lyra asked, healing a bruise on Pinkie's face.

"I can take it," the party pony exclaimed, slightly dizzy from the last blow. She shook a hoof towards the ceiling, shouting, "I will strive to be better! And oh my Celestia, my bio-prosthetic limb is turning into three legs!"

"Maybe you should put the helmet on for this."

"But it kind of gets in the way."

"Better that than take a hit to the head."

They practiced some more, with the helmet on this time. Starting that day, Pinkie would learn how to sword fight with her friends. It was rather tricky, as none of them knew exactly how to sword fight; however, that didn't stop Pinkie from getting better.

Every day, she would spar with Lyra, Amethyst, or Colgate, all of whom could form dull magic swords, or use a length of metal to help Pinkie learn to parry. It hadn't been easy at first, as learning how to balance on her hind legs and fight was knocking her down so much, even Pinkie began to lose patience.

Berry Punch and Bonbon also joined in, mostly to help Pinkie learn how to properly fight as an earth pony. Both of them had been in several fights (though only Berry had been in drunken brawls), and thus they had learned how to put their strength into self-defense.

They were both strong enough to break rocks with their hooves. Normally, the average earth pony couldn't crack a hoof with a stomp. After a few days worth of practice, Pinkie could crack and break apart stones with a single blow of her hoof.

When she had mastered learning how to fight like an earth pony, Pinkie's sword training picked up incredibly. She was even throwing in elements of her own personality into her fighting style. Pronking around the room, jumping, somersaulting, cartwheels, scrunching up her body like if it were a toy and then launching herself, all of her normal (well, normal for her) movements were being added to her fighting potential.

A week's worth of training, with quite the determination on Pinkie's part, she was able to beat a unicorn's magic-conjured weapon. A victory was either stabbing or slicing where the opponent would be if he or she were physically there, or striking the unicorn's magic-improved weapon so that it broke the creator's focus and thus the weapon vanished. A real victory would come from striking the unicorn, but Pinkie wouldn't dare swing her katana at her friends even in practice.

When Pinkie could effortlessly beat one of the unicorns in sparring, they tried two of them fighting her. Then all three of the unicorns were working to try and fight Pinkie. The party pony adapted quickly, and defeated three magic-created weapons against her without trouble.

Bonbon and Berry continued to spar with her, all of them learning how to fight better in the exchanges. Pinkie learned how to hold her sword in one hoof, both fore hooves, or even in her mouth, by the handle, when running or trading hoof blows. Again, she learned so fast, it was like a natural warrior was inside of her; she was beating both Berry and Bonbon when the two tried to outwrestle her.

Then again, that could be to how very difficult it was to pin Pinkie down.

Dinky helped out by healing all of the bruises and scrapes the ponies would get. Sometimes she joined in, but she wasn't the most combative of ponies. Still, there was a kind of determination in her, and Pinkie could guess where that was coming from.

Eventually, Twist joined in these sessions, and she and Dinky were consistently sparring partners. Four unicorns and four earth ponies practiced all their fighting potential every day, when they were not needed around Burrow XXVII.

The mining and excavation responsibilities were something Pinkie had not skipped out on, no matter how much she enjoyed sparring or partying or helping other ponies. It seemed to come naturally to her, remembering her roots as a rock farmer.

When she remembered this, it made her think of her family, and sadness grew inside her. She wanted to see if Octavia was still out there, if her mother and father were okay, if Bellamina was with them and safe. But as far as any pony knew, all of them were missing and no pony could verify where were or if they were even alive.

Still, Pinkie kept the faith that her family in this world was alive and safe. Thus, she would take to her digging and rock chores around Burrow XXVII with a sense of cheer and music.

Her digging song, which she loudly sung when mining, made no sense, but that was okay for most others; music helped the equine no matter how silly, so Pinkie didn't have to make sense to be fun for them.

However, the music that would sometimes play in her head alone, and then other times would play sound effects that could be heard by those around her, warranted some investigation.

They had let Lyra examine her; Colgate was their first idea, but the cerulean unicorn insisted that music was more Lyra's area of experience. Pinkie mentioned wearing a gicPod and headphones when she was suddenly brought to Equestria Divided, which amazed Lyra.

"Well, I'm not detecting anything in your head," Lyra had started to say, when Pinkie's eyes went wide.

"I don't have a brain?" she exclaimed in mock horror, clasping her face and miming a horrified scream.

"No, you do," Bonbon said nearby, cracking a smile, "but I'm sure it's scattered around in there. Knock her on the noggin, Lyra, let's see if it rattles."

Lyra giggled over all this, then continued. "My thoughts are, as weird as this sounds, your gicMod and headphones might have fused with your being when you were brought here. Thus, you have your music player in your head, and when your mind connects any song to your head, it plays.

"Or of course, it could relate to that thing you did when you were around in our world, where," Lyra pretended to "pull" something from behind her, though she was holding nothing, "you would sometimes pull something out of nowhere. Can you do that?"

Pinkie blinked, then pulled her party cannon from nowhere, leaning on it with a simple pose. "You mean like this?"

"Yes! How do you do that?"

"Irunno," Pinkie grunted, shrugging. "All I know is when I need something, I usually have it nearby me!"

"Unicorns can practice magic their whole lives without that kind of seamless effort," Lyra remarked. "It's like you have some hidden space for your tools. We should name it after a tool, like a screwdriver, or a wrench, or a ham-"

"I like wrenchspace," Pinkie interrupted. "We can call it my wrenchspace!"

"Why wrench?" Bonbon asked.

"Because with a twist of my wrist, I am now holding this," Pinkie sang, twisting her wrist in display as she pat her party cannon.

"Uh-huh," the yellow earth pony said, not wanting to try to make more sense of this puzzle than she had to. "Wish Doctor Whooves was here, he's better at explaining this weird 'n wild stuff."

"Any way, I carry most of my stuff in my mane anyway," Pinkie explained. "I have my towel and Pinkie Bazooka still in there, everything else is gone, sadly."

"What about the ball and funny glasses?" Lyra asked.

"I gave those to the kids, they don't have a lot of toys. Bird Chirp loves the mask. And Bounce loves the ball, go figure; methinks he's going to get that Cutie Mark of his soon, eh?"

Lyra smiled at Pinkie. "I'm sure Marigold and Dandy Skies appreciate it, even if she doesn't show it as much as he does."

Pinkie nodded. She still hoped one day, Marigold could be her friend, but she was still dubious of Pinkie despite all the effort. Marigold and Dandy had adopted the two younglings when their parents had been killed in Whitegold's militia (which they hadn't been volunteers for), and thus had been caring for them as if they were the actual parents, for about two years now.

Pinkie still remembered the time Maim had attacked Bird Chirp, which had resulted in Marigold nearly being hospitalized. Since then, the two younglings had been closer to their adoptive parents than ever, and Pinkie. Chirp was rather close to the party pony, hugging her and sometimes referring to her as a big sister.

"You think Marigold and Dandy will ever get married?" Pinkie casually asked, her train of thought on tracks that only she could lay out.

"Well, it's pretty much the same problem as with Bonny and I," Lyra said, glancing over at her lover. "There's no one to marry us. So we just sort of consider ourselves married."

"Froofie," Pinkie cursed, crossing her forearms and leaning against her party cannon. "I was hoping to see what kind of kids you two would have. I would imagine how adorable they were."

Lyra and Bonbon were both blushing, and the latter cleared her throat loudly. "Yes well, as much as we both would love that, fertility potions are one of the hardest things to come by, unless you are an official citizen of the House. And House Whitegold doesn't let peasants of the Undercity have fertility potions unless they pay a very, very large amount of money."

"Bonny and I have never been able to afford that, we cannot steal one, and we're not comfortable with letting a stallion take part like they would have to do in the old days," Lyra said, shaking her head. "So we've given up on having kids."

"Don't you dare," Pinkie snapped. "You two will have adorable babies one day, mark my words. I'll barter for one of those potions for you! I'll shave my mane for the bits!"

"As nice as that is," Bonbon said, trying not to giggle at the mental image of bald Pinkie, "the caravan has never had a fertility potion, and we've never been able to locate one in the fifteen years this has become Equestria Divided."

"What about in Inner Manehattan? Didn't you buy a ticket at one point?"

"That ticket is long gone, so we don't know how to get one from there," Lyra said. She nuzzled Bonbon, and smiled at their pink friend. "But thank you anyway, Pinkie."

As Pinkie rolled her party cannon back and forth under her hooves, a thinking habit, Lyra watched the large decorative tool with a bit of caution. "Say, that reminds me," she spoke aloud, "Pinkie, I've seen you use that to decorate for parties, how in Equestria do you get the ammo?"

The pink party pony perked her ears up, and said, "Oh, I didn't tell you? Apparently, it's connected to me in a way, like my gicPod became."

"How so?"

"Depending on how much I've worked out, how much energy I have, the party cannon seems to have as much ammo. Each time I use it, it's more like a strong, physical movement, like a brisk jog or running up a flight of stairs. So I can fire it with how much energy I have."

"I'd call that crazy, but you have a magic player infused in your head," Lyra reasoned. "So you can just adjust the cannon's setting, and fire it all day long until you become zonked?"

"Yeah, but I haven't really needed to do that. I only need it for parties, like with the Pinkie Bazooka. That's a bit more tiring to use, but it's always fun to launch cupcakes from the air."

"You haven't been able to do that since the first time you did it," Bonbon noted. "Guess that was your last ammo from your home world, and now you're stuck with what we can afford."

"I'll have to level up that skill more if I want more than a confetti blast, I know."

Lyra and Bonbon didn't get what that meant, much like how they hadn't understood any of Pinkie's video game references. The pink pony hummed in thought as she bobbed her head, suddenly lost in a tune that only she could hear.

Bonbon leaned over to her lover, and whispered, "She uses it enough at parties, why do you think it hasn't "leveled" up like she says?"

"Maybe only in combat?" Lyra whispered back. "I mean, you know how good she became with the sword."

After that conversation was over, the day ended with a grand banquet for all of Burrow XXVII. Pinkie showed off her bazooka for the children, and they all cheered wildly at the confetti bursts, especially Bird Chirp and Bounce. Bonbon and Dinky had passed out the lettuce salads for dinner, Twist made candy and cupcakes for dessert, and Dinky provided lighting and music for everypony.

Snoogle joined in to help clean up, the only diamond dog willing to help out. He also partook in some of the games, which Berry hosted this time. It had been a fun but exhaustive day for everypony.

When they were all off to bed, Pinkie found Colgate at their house already, reading a book. "Everything okay there, Colgate?" she asked her roommate. "You weren't around for dinner."

"Amethyst brought me something to eat, don't worry."

Pinkie's curiosity persisted, and she asked, "What's that book you're reading?"

"It's a theory-based novel on the Astral Plane. Not very informative, but it is all I could get."

"Why are you reading that?"

"You want to go home, don't you?"

Pinkie froze as if stuck in time. Then she collapsed on her hindquarters, staring down at the floor. "Oh no…," she whimpered, as visions of all her friends back in her world flashed before her eyes, "I'm a horrible pony. I forgot all about that. I've just been so focused on trying to help you all here-"

"Pinkie, you have had it very rough, no one can fault you for that," Colgate said. "I don't blame you for tunnel vision. Plus, you have admitted to yourself that finding a way home may be trickier than we could imagine."

"But it's been over a month now," Pinkie wailed, feeling tears sting her eyes.

When she felt a tear drop slither down from behind her eye patch, a feeling of elation came over her that beat out her misery. Covering her left eye, she lifted her patch, and blinked a great many times.

She could see through her formerly damaged eye. Very fuzzy at first, but it was coming back. Her mind spun, mostly because of how hard her brain was trying to process seeing through a long-time covered eye and a regular one simultaneously. Pinkie almost ripped the patch off in jubilation.

"I can see again," she exclaimed. "My left eye… it's all healed!"

Colgate was out of her bed in a heartbeat, inspecting her pupil. "That's marvelous! How's it feel?"

"Fuzzy-wuzzy, but oki-doki for the most part! How's it look?"

"Well, you've got a white pupil now. Maybe after a few more healing spells, that blue will return to your eye, Pinkie."

They had a mirror in their house, and Pinkie trotted over to it. Sure enough, her eyes were mismatched, her right one bright blue and her left one a colorless white around her pupil. Pinkie thought it was cool for a moment, then she noticed her scar, caused by Rainbow Dash.

"Why do you suppose," she asked Colgate, sorrow in her voice, "the magic never healed the scar, like it normally does with healing magic, Colgate?"

"That's a good question. I've seen healing magic remove scars, deeper and bigger ones than that. It may be because," she sighed and rested a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder, "your body doesn't want it to be removed."

"Silly body of mine, what's the point of that?"

"Only you could know the answer to that, Pinkie. Now come on, let's get some sleep. Tomorrow, we'll focus on finding you a way home. As wonderful as you being here is, this world isn't something I'd wish on anypony."

As Colgate headed over to the magic-lit candle and blew it out, Pinkie continued to talk. "If we do find a way, somehow… can I take you all with me?"

"There's ponies of us already there, correct? It wouldn't be right."

"I would feel awful," Pinkie persisted, as she stared at her reflection, illuminated by the moonlight shining in through their window, "if I left you all here in this awful Equestria Divided."

"Sweetheart, this is all too much for how late it is. Get some sleep, please?"

"Okay."

Pinkie didn't go to bed right away. She continued to stare at her reflection, specifically her facial scar. It started above her eyebrow, down into her socket, then traced down all the way her cheek, to where the tip of her lips would touch when she would grin one of her large Pinkie grins.

Why hadn't her facial scar faded away with the healing treatments? Her eye was normal again, normal except for the missing color, and her left foreleg had no such scars. She had seen nasty gashes and cuts on ponies here in Burrow XXVII, who had had their injuries healed with no remaining scars.

Was it really an emotional issue? Was her face not healing properly because Rainbow Dash had been the cause of it?

"Maybe that is it," Pinkie thought miserably. "After all, Lyra and Dinky have been remarkable healers, and they haven't fixed this. Not to mention… if Twilight gave Rainbow Dash those burns I saw on her, why hasn't she had them healed away? Maybe the emotional ones are impossible to fix… but my arm healed, and this Applejack did that…"

Pinkie sighed heavily, unable to stare at herself anymore. "I miss home. I miss my Rainbow Dash, my Fluttershy, my Twilight Sparkle and Applejack and Rarity! Gummy, the Cakes, the twins… I miss everypony! It's been over a month now, forty-two days, precisely. Tomorrow it will forty-three days. I hope you all forgive me for being here so long.
"Maybe tomorrow, I'll come back, and tell you all about what happened. It was quite the adventure, and though I was damaged, I'm still the same ol' Pinkie Pie!"


Tomorrow, when she woke up from a deep slumber, something felt off. Terribly off. Her Pinkie Sense wasn't tingling, unless a strong worry in her gut was a new one.

Pinkie Pie had slept in, and thus the morning crew was in the mines already, working the early shift. All the other ponies were cleaning up after breakfast. Other than that, they were keeping themselves busy, either tending to the flowers and gardens they had started planting (thanks to Pinkie), or enjoying a little off-time.

But Pinkie could feel that horrible sense in her gut tightening. She could barely register ponies congratulating her on removing the eye patch. She was so distracted, she almost ran straight into Dandy Skies.

"Pinkie," the pegasus exclaimed. His eyes were so wide with intensity, they threatened to pop out of the sockets. "Have you seen Bird Chirp? I cannot find her anywhere!"

"Is she at home, maybe?"

"No, that's where Marigold and Bounce are! I told them to stay put at home in case Chirp comes back, but it's been an hour. I'm really, really starting to worry!"

"Calm down, calm down," Pinkie ordered him, holding his shoulders. "Now here's what we're going to do, okay? Tell everypony up you can to search for her, but remain calm; she more than likely wandered off to play. Check the river, the party areas, and maybe outside where the caravan usually parks; they might have shown up.

"Fly around, but don't shout out, or the diamond dogs may make you stop. I'll go into the mines and look for her, okay?"

"Okay, just please find her! If something happened…"

Pinkie didn't wait for the rest, she bolted towards the mines. Passing by mining ponies and diamond dog guards, she looked around earnestly for any sign of the young pegasus. Bird Chirp should have stood out in the mines, being bright yellow with a white mane.

"Where could she have gone?" Pinkie said to herself as she ran down the corridors, some of which she had helped dig herself. "I wish Doctor Whooves were here; if he's anything like my Whooves, he was great at finding Dinky when she would wander off. All that stuff I told Dandy was advice I got from him over the twins.
"Bird Chirp, where could you have gone? You know not to go into the mines… am I just wasting time? I…

"Oh no."

Pinkie was passing by the boarded up tunnel to Honor Bound's tomb. Only it wasn't boarded up anymore. The planks had been smashed down, and heavy paw prints were in the dirt.

For a brief moment, panic forced Pinkie to stand still to collect her thoughts. Then, without a second's more hesitation, she galloped down the tunnel. When she saw light coming from the tomb, her fear grew even higher.

She skidded to a halt in Honor Bound's tomb, almost crashing into a magic-fire lantern had been set in the middle of the room. Honor's coffin, with the helmet and sword laying on top as usual, was undisturbed.

On the right side of the circular tomb was Maim, looming over Bird Chirp. The pegasus filly cowered, her eyes wide in terror as she pressed her small body against the rocky wall. She was too terrified to even utter a noise.

The gigantic diamond dog snickered as he snagged her tail and lifted her up. Bird Chirp let out a terrified shriek, her hooves wailing and tiny wings flapping. As she fought for her life, Maim brought his nose close to her hindquarters and sniffed.

"Save your screams," the diamond dog said, sadistic glee in his gravely voice, "I wants to hear them when-"

"HEY!"

Pinkie's shout echoed around the tomb, amplifying her fury and shock. Maim turned towards to the party pony, and his face turned into an ugly scowl.

"You get the Tartarus out of here, and I mays not skin you."

"You put her down," Pinkie ordered, standing her ground, "right now."

Maim snarled. When he did, frothy drool ran from his mouth down his jawline. "You dare tell me what to do? You know what, pink pony? I have hads it with you.

"When I am doing having my funs with this filly, you are next. Maybe a pony who is a little older won't screams as much, but I thinks I shall enjoy it mores."

Suddenly, Pinkie Pie's worst nightmare appeared to her in the flesh right before her. She had always worried that the reason ponies kept the fillies away from Maim was solely because he was violent and aggressive. The way mares and even stallions would back away from him when he was in one of his moods…

Equestria Divided had been violence, death, and horror ever since Pinkie Pie had arrived. She had tried to adapt in Burrow XXVII, but this, this was the last straw.

She would take a stand, here and now, for her friends. Even if this wasn't her world, these were her friends. She wouldn't see another being harmed.

"Put her down," Pinkie shouted, sticking her hoof into her mane. She pulled out the Pinkie Bazooka, and pointed it at Maim. "RIGHT! NOW!"

Maim snarled as he fully turned towards Pinkie. "You want her?" he asked tauntingly, dangling the flailing filly at her. "Come on then, pink pony, take her. But not before I haves my fun with her first."

Maim opened his mouth, and extended his tongue towards Bird Chirp's hind quarters. Pinkie pulled the trigger, and a mauve-colored plushie shot out. When it impacted with Maim's mouth, it knocked him backwards from the explosion, confetti and streamers shooting into his face and down his throat.

He dropped Chirp, gagging and coughing, shaking his dazed head. The pegasus filly practically hit the ground running, racing to Pinkie and clinging to her.

"Thank you," she whimpered pitifully. Her eyes were red from crying in terror, but gratitude shown in them as well.

The party pony nodded, and hurried towards the tomb's only way out, the tunnel she had entered in. With Bird Chirp clinging to her, it was a little hard to run, thus Maim managed to beat her to the entrance.

He was such a large diamond dog, his girth practically covered the entire entrance. She was acutely aware she had just angered a being three times as big as her. The staring contest between the furious dog and determined pony ended with a furious bark from him.

"You has made me really angry, pink pony," Maim shouted, clenching his fists. He raised them above his head in a two-fisted attacking manner, even if she wasn't anywhere close to him.

"This isn't good," Pinkie thought. Her head, with that gicPod-infused brain of hers, was already kicking in the music.

"I IS GOING TO TEAR YOU APART!!"

Maim struck the ground with both fists, causing a tremor in the tomb. Dust fell from the ceiling, the walls vibrated, and cracks formed in the ground. Like a powerful earthquake, Pinkie and Bird Chirp were knocked back. As she started to stand up, the imposing diamond dog lunged at her.

She leapt to the side, careful to not land on Chirp. His arm struck her side, a glancing blow that sent her and the pegasus filly sprawling, knocked apart. Maim collided with Honor Bound's coffin, and it was smashed to pieces by the impact.

Pinkie, trying to see through all the dust that had been kicked up, saw the katana blade in its sheath land right in front of her. She managed to grab it just as her tail twitched, and she jumped backward to avoid Maim's mammoth fist crashing down where she had been standing.

Sliding to a halt on her hind legs, she strapped the scabbard to her side, and unsheathed the katana blade. She and Maim were staring each other down now.

"You will never," she hissed vehemently, "harm another pony, or another soul. Never, ever again. By Honor Bound's blade, I Pinkie Promise you."

"I," Maim snarled right back, murder in his eyes and poison in his words, "will rips you apart, slowly, limb by limb."

"Pinkie!"

The faint cry was barely heard over the intensity of the fighting words, but Bird Chirp's call didn't miss Pinkie's ears. Honor Bound's helmet bounced and rolled towards the pink pony, a throw that had been by a scared, but brave, filly. Pinkie heard her retreating down the tunnel, and smiled to herself, knowing that whatever happened here, Chirp was safe.

The pink pony picked up the helmet. Maim growled gutturally as she fastened the chin strap. "You has been planning mutiny, has you?" he asked, spitting the words out. "Then I will needs no excuse…"

He pulled one of his daggers from his belt, the metal gleaming in the lantern's light. "… When I gut you. Yous had better get ready to scream, pink pony!"

He leapt at her, swinging his knife at her face. She thought back to all her training, all her practice, and swung the katana.

Metal clashed with metal, the chilling sound echoing around the tomb. Pinkie's blow was more skilled, but Maim's was stronger, thus the exchange was evenly met. They both swung again, Pinkie aiming to defend more so than attack.

When he attempted to stab her eye, she leapt back. He swung with his free paw, and she cartwheeled out of range. Maim snarled and lunged at her again, teeth bared.

Pinkie kicked with her hind leg, flipping herself around as her back hoof uppercutted the large diamond dog. It wasn't much of a blow, but knocking his teeth together slightly stunned Maim. He obviously wasn't used to a blow being delivered.

Barking furiously, he hurled his dagger at her. She parried, sending it clattering to the side. He threw a second one at her, and she tilted her head soon enough to dodge it lodging in her neck; she felt her pink mane take a tiny trim from the thrown blade.

The third dagger to be hurled was aimed at her face. She swung the katana, a special attack she would use to destroy magic-created weapons. Honor Bound, with its enduring enchants, cut through the crude metal of the dagger.

As two halves of a knife clattered to the ground, Maim pulled out two more, dual-wielding them. He leapt at her, slicing in a berserk frenzy.

She parried as fast as her forelegs could, matching his attacks with parries and dodges. Pinkie kept this up until her forearms felt like lead. Her breathing was heavy, she was sweating, but Maim didn't seem to be tiring.

Leaping backwards, she pulled out her trusty party cannon, and hit the button. The impact blast, mixed with blinding confetti, sent the unprepared Maim sprawling backwards. Pinkie used her cannon as a springboard, bouncing off on her hind legs to swing down at his head.

Recovering just in time, the diamond dog backhanded her, sending her skidding across the floor. She almost dropped her katana as she desperately picked herself up, just in time to leap back on all fours. Maim had pulled out his bloodstained cleaver, and swung it down at her.

The large cutting tool imbedded into the rocky ground, and he yanked it out with an annoyed grunt. Pinkie could now see, since it was out, just how big this blade was. The metal head was almost as large as herself, the handle as long as she was snout to tail.

"You," Maim shouted, "are really pissing me off!"

He hacked into the ground, and in true diamond dog fashion, burrowed down into the dirt floor, leaving behind a large hole. Dirt flew back as Maim dug deeper down, and the ground rumbled as he tore around the hard rock and earth.

Pinkie wondered if he could sense where she was on the surface. She stood on her hind legs, trying to gauge the vibrations. "You were a rock farmer once, Pinkie," she thought. "Do not let him get the jump on you-"

The ground below her exploded, a large fist plowing upwards first. It glanced Pinkie, still enough to send her sprawling. Maim roared as he leapt into the air, digging right back down upon landing. The floor shook aggressively as he moved for another attack.

Pinkie bolted on all fours, trying to outrun him, but he burst out from below her again, striking her flank. She winced at what surely would be a bruise later. Maim was underground again in an eye blink, growling like a predator on the hunt.

As the diamond dog shuffled through the earth, he could sense her hoof beats above him. He grinned through the shifting earth, thinking about this time, he would catch her in his teeth. Maim would enjoy tearing her apart, and he'd start on those hind legs that she had been standing on.

"Time to end this, stupid pink pony," he thought as he headed up to where he sensed her standing.

He burst through the surface, straight into the barrel of the Pinkie Bazooka. Pinkie had leapt into the air and was pointing her weapon straight down at him.

"Party Blast," she shouted the name of the move that had been totally made up just now, hitting the diamond dog point-blank in the face with her bazooka. As this slammed him against the ground and dazed him, the force sent her flying straight up into the air. She twirled, then came straight down with her right foreleg extended.

"PINKIE," she exclaimed, giving Maim enough time to widen his eyes in shock as the pink pony struck him forcefully in-between the eyes with her hoof, "PUNCH!"

She flipped off him, then unsheathed her sword as he scurried to his feet. He tried shaking off the daze, but the blows had been harder than he had expected; and truthfully, harder than Pinkie thought they would be too.

"You are so deads, pink pony," Maim hollered, heaving in fury. He slammed his cleave into the ground several times, taunting at her. "I will skins you, I will eats you!

"And after I am done with having my ways with you, I is going to do the same thing to that filly!"

"Never," Pinkie screamed right back, her blue and white eyes flashing in righteous fury.

They sprinted at each other, weapons ready. Maim swung down at her, and the exchange of blows nearly knocked her katana from her hooves. He took this opportunity to grasp her helmet, to hold her place for a beheading chop with his cleaver.

Pinkie, despite the pain of being gripped by his massive paw, acted fast. She seized her katana by her mouth, and, with the fastest twist of her neck, sliced at his wrist.

Most would doubt that could be a strong blow; however, Pinkie was not normal by any standards. Her mouth as strong as always, her neck and body able to bend in ways that startled others.

Pinkie severed Maim's paw at the wrist with that slice. Blood spewed from the wound, and the diamond dog stared at the stump in unbelieving stupefaction. His paw hit the ground and Pinkie rolled away, right before he let out a bloodcurdling howl.

Anyone who knew Pinkie would think such an action was impossible for her, and even more inconceivable would be she wouldn't be shocked by what she had done. But right now, battle adrenaline was pumping in her veins, defending the innocent was on her mind, and that severed paw symbolized the molestation of a sweet filly.

Blood and an amputated paw were nothing more to her than a sign that true evil was losing.

As she sprinted at him on her hind legs, a run that was swift with her back almost parallel with the ground, she leapt at him with another slice of her katana. Maim wasn't done yet, no matter how much pain he was in. He swung at her, swatting her aside but cutting his arm where her sword attempted to score a fatal blow.

"You pay," he shrieked, his gravely voice shrill with rage and pain. "You pay!! I will kills you! I will kills you!"

He scraped at the ground with his foot, then stampeded towards her. Recovering from the vicious swatting, she managed to jump away just in time; it felt like a train rushing by her. He impacted with the wall, and the whole tomb shook. Rocks and dust fell from the ceiling.

Maim turned towards her, and dropped his cleaver. His remaining, enormous paw dug into the ground. He pulled out a large chunk of it, and chucked it at her. Rocks, dust, and dirt sprayed Pinkie, who turned her head to let her helmet take the brunt of the attack.

He charged again, she sprung aside. When he impacted with the wall again, she was thrown off her hooves. He leapt towards her, feet ready to stomp her to a bloody pulp. Pinkie pulled her party cannon to her and rode off on its recoil burst. Maim was left punching the ground, confetti and dust where the pink pony had been.

The diamond dog plunged his paw into the ground, pulling out enough earth and rock to be a fairly large boulder compared to Pinkie. He hurled it at her, and she shot another blast from her party cannon, this time holding her ground.

Rock met Party Blast, and the impact in mid-air clapped throughout the tomb. Pinkie blinked the dust away from her eyes to see Maim pouncing at her, howling for blood.

She swung upwards, and her sword sliced into his fur and flesh. Maim's remaining paw knocked her to the side, wrenching her grasp from the katana. When she hit the wall, she could feel her body screaming for this to stop, despite the adrenaline fighting off the pain.

Pinkie's katana was imbedded in Maim's wide neck. The diamond dog didn't even appear to notice, he was chuckling darkly, panting hard as he turned towards her. By now, his blood splattered around the tomb, still dripping from the stump on his arm and from his neck.

"Little pony… thinks she can hurt me…," he scoffed, a cruel grin on his face. "Little pink pony… gonna sees… her insides soon…"

He lumbered for her, reaching out with his remaining paw. She bolted to the side, and he chased after her. She tried to summon her party cannon, but the amount of energy it was taking resulted in a failure.

As she ran, Pinkie tripped on the uneven ground of the tomb, the floor terribly mauled by Maim. He seized her flank from behind, and she reared her head back. The horns on her helmet cut into his arm, enough to make him let go and cry out in pain.

Maim tried to clutch the bloody scratches she had left, but he no longer had a paw to do that with. With a furious snarl at this realization, he pounced at her again. Knocking her onto her back, he moved in to bite her. Thinking fast, she struck his eye with the flat of her hoof.

Maim howled in agony. "My eye! Augh! You dirty pony! You die! YOU DIE!!"

His massive fist swung towards her head. She turned her neck just in time for the helmet take the majority of the blow, its magic enchantment and masterful craftsmanship keeping her suffering damage, but it did daze her. He grasped her chest and pinned her down, his large mouth opened and razor teeth visible, ready to bite her.

She saw her katana lodged in his neck, blood still dripping around the steel that almost appeared to be set in that thick mass of flesh and fur that was Maim's neck. Pinkie kicked the katana's handle with her hind leg, lodging it further in.

Maim felt it now. He gurgled, opening his mouth as a wretched gag escaped his throat. Blood dribbled from his mouth, and his grasp on her weakened. She freed herself, and as he attempted to seize her again, rather feebly, her left hoof clenched the handle of the samurai blade.

"Thank you, bio-prosthetics," she murmured, feeling her semi-artificial arm and hoof still as strong as ever, despite the intense action and strain her body had been through. Maim let out another gurgle, trying to clench her mane, as she pushed on the hilt.

A strained snarl was split in half when Pinkie, with all her might, pushed her sword through his neck, swinging in an arc that ended with her standing in front of him.

There was disbelief in his eyes, as his head slid off the neck and onto the floor. Pinkie stood still for a moment, as Maim's body collapsed with an audible thud and his head rolled away.

She swung her katana around, flicking the excess blood from the blade, before sheathing it and walking away.

The adrenaline, the energy that had kept her going the whole fight, to ignore the pain and horror and exhaustion, it was still going through her. As she wiped a wet splotch of blood from her forehead, she examined Honor Bound's tomb with a calm, steady gaze.

Maim's rampage had ravaged all of the warrior's resting place. The floor had been torn into, the stone carvings of ponies in armor had been smashed or badly cracked, and the sarcophagus was obliterated. Honor Bound's tomb had been destroyed by the diamond dog, though Pinkie felt responsible.

At least this way, the tomb would just appear as ruins, instead of a secret kept by the ponies. There was no way she could hide this incident, the diamond dogs would smell the blood spilt here, no doubt.

The blood…

It all rushed to Pinkie at once, hitting her in the stomach and in her head in a one-two punch that made her knees weak. She collapsed on all fours, hind knees and fore hooves, head hanging as she fought the urge to throw up, or scream, or both.

She had just killed someone. She had taken a life. Pinkie Pie had never considered, not once, doing something as brutal and cruel as that. Now, even with the great necessity, she felt it burning into her mind, into her soul: she had murdered someone.

"No, wait! Not murder," she thought desperately. "To murder is to take the life of an innocent, to commit an evil act. This was in self-defense, this was defending a little filly.

"Yet, somehow," a dark part of Pinkie's mind mused, "it is also an excuse to kill. We needed that, didn't we?"

"Wha… wha… WHAT? No! I'm not a killer! I'm not a violent pony! This was necessary… we aren't that kind of pony!"

She felt sweat run down her forehead, dripping onto the ground. Blood was still drying on that floor, on herself, and she could feel it. It almost felt burning against her coat. The katana, now sheathed and on her back, felt white-hot, the source of the kill.

"How could you do it, Honor Bound?" she thought desperately, wanting somepony, anypony, to tell her. "How can you take someone's life and feel okay about it afterwards?"

Another voice echoed in her head. It didn't sound familiar, but at the same time, as logical and in control as Pinkie could be in this stressful moment.

"Look no further than the name," she heard herself thinking. "Honor Bound. It was his honor to fight for the princesses, for Luna, for his fellow pony. And he fought with honor. Take comfort in that you are doing what no pony else should.
"You always said you would do anything for your friends, Pinkie Pie. Here are friends who saved your life, gave you a home, and took you in despite the danger it brought to themselves. They need you now, they need you to do this.
"That is Honor. That is the blade you wield. You are bound to the honor of being a true friend, of a warrior, of a pink party pony protecting the pure and the principled.
"You are now…"

Her train of thought was interrupted when she heard something, or rather somethings, running up the tunnel to the tomb. She stood on all four and turned around, facing the diamond dogs that had run into the tomb.

"The smell of blood, here," one of them shouted. He was the first to see Maim's corpse, and let out a scream of terror.

"Maim! Maim is dead!" another hollered.

"Oh gnaw bones," one of the smaller ones cursed, "this not good!"

They all stared at the corpse, some furious, some horrified, some both. Then they all saw Pinkie Pie, and started shouting at her.

"What happen, pony? What happen to Maim?"

"You do this, pony?"

"What is with armor?" One of the diamond dogs, who Pinkie knew slightly more than the others, was gaping at her. He saw the same pony who had given him sugary cupcakes as a token of good will, now covered in Maim's blood. Her own injuries matched the brutal look she was sporting, with her katana scabbard and helmet.

"You killed Maim," another of the dogs, larger, shouted accusingly. "You dids it, didn'ts you?"

"Yes, I did."

Pinkie Pie stared them down, barely recognizing her own voice, let alone her attitude here. "He attacked me and another pony. I acted in self-defense."

"Murderer!"

"No, I said, he attacked me, he tried to kill me first. But I don't think I want to argue this, I know how stubborn most of you are."

The party pony knew most of the dogs now staring at her were the ones who had been on Maim's side, when Burrow XXVII was divided between enjoying the parties or loathing them. Only a couple of the diamond dogs there were the ones who had become more gentle with ponies.

She knew where this could go, and though she was outnumbered, she didn't feel the same kind of fear as before.

"Maim sought to do something unforgivable to somepony," Pinkie explained. "I won't stand for the cruel treatment of my friends anymore."

"We kills you," one of the bigger dogs barked, balling her paws into fists. "Pony no tell dogs what to do!"

"Kill the pony," some of the other dogs chanted and barked. "Kill the pink pony!"

"No," Pinkie retorted, "this pony is having her way now."

Despite failing to earlier, Pinkie summoned her party cannon. Standing on it with her right hind leg, she unsheathed her sword and ran her hoof on the flat side as she stared them down. Her eyes, both blue and white, were strong and fierce enough that could rival a certain friend of hers; it sent shivers up the diamond dogs' spines.

"My friends have suffered too much because of your cruelty. And so, I'm going to stop what I can. I'm not here to cause a rebellion, I'm here to right the wrongs.

"I don't want to kill any of you, nor harm you. But if you plan to hurt my friends any more, you're going to regret crossing that line." Pinkie narrowed her eyes, and added, "Harm my friends, then you better be ready to come at me, doggy."

The diamond dogs stared at her, until one of them asked, his voice between outrage and shock, "Who are yous, pony?"

"I am the Pink Samurai."

Pinkie drew a line in the dirt in front of her with the tip of her sword. A taunting smile spread across her face, and she asked, "And you'd better think to ask why, before you mess with the Pink Samurai. Come on, guys, who wants to try? Comply? I can only rhyme so many times before I get bored-y."

Cheating on that last rhyme didn't lower the intimidation factor that the diamond dogs felt when she had drawn that line. The one that had gone to Pinkie's parties cleared his throat, and said while backing up, "Look, me never liked Maim. So long as we are all goods together, I is okay with you and ponies? Okay, pretty pony?"

"Okay, handsome dog."

The dog managed a peaceful smile, and then turned and left. A couple of the dogs followed him, a combination of respect and fear of Pinkie. About five of them were left, the one standing closest snarling loudly.

"We is not going to let pony tell what to do," she shrieked at Pinkie. "We is not intimidated by you!"

"Then, as one says before a duel of this caliber… ON PAR!"

The diamond dogs leapt at Pinkie Pie, teeth bared, paws bawled into fists. The Pink Samurai stomped on her party cannon, and commenced the battle of fate for Burrow XXVII.


THERE IS NO DOUBT ABOUT IT NOW.

IT IS A TERRIBLE SHAME, BUT THERE WAS NO OTHER WAY.

HONOR IS HER BLADE, MORALS IS HER GUIDE, FRIENDSHIP IS HER MAGIC.

SHE WILL FACE ANY AND ALL EVILS OF THIS WORLD…

THE JESTER'S DIABOLICAL BELIEFS…

THE DRAGOON'S VIOLENT INTOLERANCE…

THE GEM'S SADISTIC DESIRES…

THE STAR'S EXTREME CRUSADE…

THE THUNDER'S FERVENT WARPATH…

THE FOREST'S BARBARIC REVENGE…

AND ANY OTHER THREATS THAT ENDANGER US ALL.

EQUESTRIA DIVIDED!

YOU NOW FACE…

THE PINK SAMURAI.


SAVE CURRENT PROGRESS?

> YES. NO.


CONGRATULATIONS! You have successfully reached Level 1 of the Samurai class! Pinkie Pie has a special "slice"!

Unlocked Weapon: The Cannon (Party Cannon). Level 1.

Unlocked Weapon: The Anti-Pointed Stick Device (Pinkie Bazooka). Level 1.

Unlocked Weapon: The Katana (Honor). Level 1.

Unlocked Armor: The Samurai's Helm (Bound's Helmet).

Unlocked Trinket: The All-Encompassing Panic-Negating Essential Travel Tool (Towel).

Unlocked Trinket: Noggin Jukebox (gicPod).

New Skill: Bipedal Movement. Level Max.

New Skill: Hoof-to-Hoof Combat. Level 1.

Your home base has been set to: Burrow XXVII.

You are now Honored with Burrow XXVII.

You are now Friendly with The Traveling Caravan.

You are now Unknown by House Whitegold.

You are now Hunted by House Earthborn.

You are now Hunted by House Stormwing.

You are now Hunted by House Moon & Star.

You are now Hunted by House Everfree.

You are now Hunted by The Cult of Laughter.

You are now Knee-Deep In It with Equestria Divided.