Our six mare heroes and two princesses end up in another world, one that contains nothing they could face. However, with the help of four new comrades, they may just ascend from darkness.
Element 115, the secrets that hold it are a complete mystery to all except one group. Group 935 They tried to create a new super-soldier with this element. The experiments went wrong however, and all hell broke loose. Meanwhile, eight mares are preparing for an important day, but this event may in fact spell their doom. Join the Mane Six, the two princesses, and four zombie warriors as they try to ascend from darkness, and find salvation.
In Equestria, at night, there was a mare called Twilight Sparkle. She had just completed a prophecy and ended up as one of the most powerful ponies in all of Equestria.
She became a princess.
She couldn't believe it herself, but if she didn't botch an important spell, and nearly destroy her life as she knew it, she wouldn't have become one. The funniest things can happen from such mistakes. Celestia had agreed to personally give Twilight her own coronation tomorrow afternoon, as for right now, she was doing what she did best during these events.
Worry.
"Oh, what if I do something un-princess-like? What if some madpony came in and tried to attack me? What if..." Twilight rambled.
"Twilight, be quiet!" Spike yelled, annoyed. "I know that you are going to be a full-blown princess, especially now that you are an alicorn, but you need to stop worrying. Try to relax by... um... Ooh, reading a book! That always calms you down."
Twilight, looked at her assistant, and smiled. "You're right, Spike, I just need to relax, not worry. Nothing will go wrong at all."
"Glad to hear." Spike yawned and proceeded to go bed. Twilight smiled at the dragon and proceeded to open a random book.
"Huh, humans? That's a hoot." Twilight said sarcastically. She knew that humans didn't exist at all.
Not at all.
Meanwhile, in another universe, three men were being watched over by a man in a Wehrmacht outfit. Doctor Edward Richtofen had just set forward the first of many steps needed to begin his quest to finally get control those verdammt minions.
But for now, there was work to do.
The first to stir was the Japanese man. He has slowly opened his narrow eyes and looked at the doctor. Richtofen noticed and smiled.
"Ah, good, you are awake." Richtofen greeted
"Ohh, who are you?" the Japanese man groaned.
"I am Doctor Richtofen, and I am the one who is going to help you survive this zombie apocalypse.”
"Zombies, hah, I'd rike to see one come here and try."
*RAGGH*
The man looked around, and saw a zombie, tied up with another.
"You were saying?" Richtofen said.
The Oriental sighed and spoke.
"I am Takeo Masaki of the Imperial Japanese Army. I fight for honor and grory!" Takeo stood up, and pumped his fist.
"Good to hear, mien freund. Now take this." Richtofen handed Takeo an M1911 handgun, fully loaded.
"Why wourd I use an American weapon?"
"Ask him." Richtofen pointed at the American man, who was just waking up. He groaned and looked over to see the two men talking.
"Ah shit, you're not gonna get me, Tojo, and neither will you, you damn dirty Nazi!" The American stood up, realizing that he was free. He looked at his hand, and was soon given an M1911, just like Takeo did.
"Why the hell are you giving me a gun?"
"Because of those two." Richtofen pointed at the undead, who just simply groaned.
*SAM*
"What the fuck." The man was confused.
"My name is Richtofen, and this is my associate, Takeo."
"Umm, okay, Sargent Tank Dempsey of the Third Shock Marine Brigade." Dempsey saluted, letting Takeo know one thing.
"Hmm, something about you is not rike other Americans."
"Whatever you say, Tak."
"Prease don't carr me that."
"Would you two shut up, I am having hangover." A voice yelled. The three turned to see a Russian man, slowly rubbing his temples with his palms.
"And you are?" Dempsey asked.
"I am Nikolai Belinski, and I am drunk."
"Ooo, wunderbar." Richtofen said, with an unusual amount of glee.
"Right, and what the hell are those two doing?"
*MRAH HA GRAH*
"Oh, almost forgot. Gentlemen, those are zombies." Richtofen gestured to the moaning duo, before taking out a Lugar and shooting the two zombies in the head.
"Zombies, like second wife?" Nikolai joked.
"I guess, Nikolai." Richtofen shrugged.
"Wait, where the hell are we?!" Dempsey needed answers.
"Oh, right! Welcome... to SHI NO NUMA!" Richtofen yelled out as the zombies began to swarm the swamp base.
*RAH*
*GARGA*
*OHH*
*MMAHH*
*SAM*
*EDDY... DIES*
The morning sun began to beam down onto the future princess. Today was the big day. Twilight woke up and went to the shower. She had not gotten used to the fact that she had wings now, but she had to make due. She did the usual routine of eating breakfast, brushing her teeth afterwards, and making a checklist.
All she had to do was go to Canterlot via chariot. Twilight did say she'll go, under one condition. Her friends and family must be there for sure. As she trotted down to the bottom of the stairs, she saw her six friends: Spike, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. Pinkie was basically bawling her eyes out at the fact that her bestest, best friend in the entire world is going to become royalty herself.
"Don't cry, Pinkie, this isn't anything to be sad about."
"I'm not sad, Twilight, I sooooooo happy for you. Who else would have thought YOU, of all ponies, would become a princess?"
Twilight blushed at that remark. Not even she would've thought this was happening. Regardless, the show must go on, as the saying goes.
"There's our ride!" Rainbow yelled out, pointing to the chariot being pulled by a couple of Pegasi. It landed near the group of seven hopped on.
"The Wunderwaffe DG-2!" Richtofen felt so happy, and aroused. The most powerful weapon ever created, in his hands.
"Hey, Dicktofen, how about you use that wonder waffle on those freaksacks over there and see if it stops them!" Dempsey said as he fired his BAR into the crowd of zombies. Nikolai grabbed the nearest weapon and loaded it, which happened to be a double barreled shotgun.
"Da, this is same weapon used to kill first wife. She was bitch." Nikolai aimed his no nonsense weapon at the colorful blurs and fired both barrels at the same time. Nikolai gagged a little afterwards.
"Oh shit, swallowed some zombie. It is not good tasting."
Richtofen slapped the box and it opened up. The weapons cycled until...
"The box of pleasure mocks me!" Richtofen moaned. The box began to float up and soon disappeared.
"Sprit up!" Takeo said as the group realized that they were surrounded. Richtofen fired the Wunderwaffe at a side and a lightning bolt flew out. The electricity chained from zombie to zombie until an entire side was dead. The group decided to split up and go in different directions. Richtofen went to the doctor's quarters, Nikolai went to the comms bay, Dempsey to the storage bay and Takeo ended up in the fishing hut. As they reloaded, they soon noticed something strange in each of their respective areas.
*AHHRAHRAGH*
It was time, Twilight trotted down the hallway, slowly and gracefully. She gave an aside glance to see her brother, her sister-in-law, her parents, her friends. They were smiling for her, and she was sure that they were proud. She was standing at the end of the hall, countless ponies watching her as she stood proudly in her regal clothing, made by Rarity herself. Rainbow was ready to perform the Rainboom. Discord himself even joined in, hanging in the skylines, away from prying eyes.
"This should be good." Discord said.
Princess Celestia looked over to her student and smiled.
"I'm so proud of you."
"Thank you princess." Twilight gave a very calming smile, this was most ponies' dream, to become a high authority and lead this land.
"Let us begin!" Celestia yelled out. The Elements of Harmony lined up next to Twilight while Luna was on the other side.
Crrr
"Twilight Sparkle..."
Crrr
"...you and the Elements of Harmony have helped defend Equestria from disaster countless times..."
Crrr
"Does anypony hear that?" One of the audience members asked.
"...and thanks to you, you have stopped yet anoth... what is that?"
CRRR
"A meteor! RUN!"
"The sky is falling!"
"Meteors!"
"What!" Twilight couldn't believe it either. The two princesses and the Elements ran away, knowing how much damage these kinds of natural disasters can cause. After several minutes, they were almost to the safehouse, but...
CRRRRRCRAAHHHGHGHH
The meteor literally landed in front of the eight. Once the initial shock died down, the eight walked a bit closer to the meteor.
"Whoo, that was close!" Applejack said, wiping the sweat from her brow.
Fluttershy was basically curled up in a ball because of this rock.
"Well, looks like we have to help clean up this mess." Rainbow looked over to the rest of them, who nodded in agreement.
Celestia and Luna began to use their magic to levitate the rock up, but something in the rock messed with their magic and...
WRRRrrr
"I dunno." Pinkie wasn't sure either.
Apparently, the meteor had a very rare element in Equestria, or even the universe for that matter, Element 115. Said Element reacted with the sudden use of magic and has caused the magic to suddenly turn against its users in a powerful wave of magic. A large flash came, so bright, that the Gryphon empire could see it in the daylight sky. The flash dissipated as soon as it came, and too everypony's shock to those who were there, something terrible happened.
The Elements of Harmony and the Princesses had disappeared into thin air.
Dempsey ran in and opened the door. A perk machine appeared and cycled until...
"JUGGERNOG!"
Dempsey immediately went to the machine and payed for a drink. As he chugged the nog down, a flash appeared next to him. A belch and dropped bottle later, he looked to see two things that shouldn't exist.
A rainbow-maned pegasus and a brightly colored winged unicorn with a pink mane. The two creatures looked around in confusion until Dempsey spoke.
"What... the actual... fuck?"
"What the..."
"Holy shit! Did you just talk?"
"Umm, yeah. What, you never seen a Pegasus before?" the pegasus yelled out, flying into the air.
"Hell no, I haven't. And what's with the rainbow get up, you queer or something?"
"Wait, queer!" The pegasus entered a battle pose.
"Rainbow Dash, stand down."
"But princess..."
"Now!" The big winged unicorn spoke up. The Pegasus, Dempsey figured to be Rainbow Dash, crossed her forelegs around each other, which confused the marine. He grew up on a ranch before and the horses he knew never could do that, and weren't colorful, and didn't speak. He just shook his head and spoke.
"Seriously, who the hell are you two?"
"Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in all of Equestria!" Rainbow hopped into the air and hovered above the ground with a smug look on her face. Dempsey just shook his head.
"Right, and you are?"
"Princess Celestia."
"Princess, eh? Well just to let you know, this place ain't the place for royalty."
"And why..."
*GRAAGH*
"What was that?" Rainbow entered a battle pose. Celestia spread her legs to lower her body to whatever might try to attack her.
And then a hoard came.
"Get ready, shit's about to go down!" Dempsey took out his BAR and fired into the crowd. The box soon appeared behind him and he took a swing at it. Rainbow and Celestia tried attacking them, but magic just absorbed into them, and these things don't feel pain, as Rainbow found out too late.
"AHH, let go of me!"
"Hold on Rainbow, Dempsey's coming!" Dempsey had gotten an MG42 and prepared to fire at the hoard. In mere seconds, the hoard was nothing but a pile of writhing limbs. Rainbow looked at herself and saw that she was covered in blood. She tried to keep a macho personality, but this was just too much.
"Good thing you got a marine on your side. Name's Tank Dempsey, and I'm a general badass." Dempsey put his gun over his shoulder and grinned. Celestia looked over to the man and gave a sigh.
"Thank you, it seems we are powerless against these beasts. Can you help us?"
"I suppose, but the others are definitely gonna ask questions."
"Others?"
"Okay, I am too drunk to be running like this!" Nikolai was running away from the zombies and smashed through the door. He looked around and saw a phone. "Okay, what is number again? Oh right..." Nikolai put his finger along the numbers and turned the dial. "Nine... one... one!" Nikolai held the phone to his head and waited.
"I know you're there..." A voice spoke. Nikolai decided that help wasn't coming and hung up.
"Okay, so that was failure. Oh well, time to drink!" Nikolai leaned against a dark stuffed animal and took out a bottle.
"GET OFF OF US, CREATURE!"
"Ah, loud noises hurt Nikolai!" The drunk recoiled and turned to see an orange pony with a hat, and a dark horse with wings and a horn. Nikolai looked at them, and then his bottle.
"Alright, someone slipped something into my vodka. I bet it was Takeo." Nikolai said, before drinking from his bottle again.
"What are you?" The orange pony spoke.
"I am Nikolai Belinski, armed and drunk Russian, and you are talking horse."
"Ah'm a pony."
"Whatever, I'm drunk..."
*GROAGH*
Nikolai sighed and took out a PPsH-41 and saw a dozen zombies rush into the room. Nikolai fired onto the group before killing them all and having to reload.
"Do not fuck with drunk Russian!" Nikolai took a drink of vodka and turned towards the duo, who looked shocked.
"And I did all of that, while drunk."
"Umm, right... Our name's Luna, and this is our friend Applejack."
"Oh, fucking royalty. Well then, get ready to drop down to proletariat standards, suka!"
"Wait, are you saying... that in this world..."
"Yep, you are no more powerful than orange pony there. Follow Nikolai, there are other people that you may like."
"Others?" Applejack raised an eyebrow.
Takeo sliced yet another zombie's head off with his katana. He felt a great amount of honor rising within himself and proceeded to enter the fishing hut. Before the machine appeared however, a flash appeared, and Takeo covered his eyes. When Takeo moved his hand away from his eyes, he saw a yellow Pegasus with wings and a white unicorn. Takeo just raised an eyebrow and took out his flamethrower to use against the hoard.
"Oh my, where are we?"
"I don't know, Rarity, what is this place?"
"I have no idea Fluttershy, Darling."
"I do."
The two ponies turned to see Takeo, looking at the duo rather analytically.
"Who.. who are you?" The white unicorn asked as the yellow Pegasus hid behind her.
"Takeo Masaki, honorabre warrior. Takeo bowed in respect and spoke. "And you are Rarity, and you are Fruttershy." Takeo pointed at each pony individually.
"How do you know that?" Fluttershy said, still hiding behind Rarity.
"I heard you mention names. This swamp, is not safe for you. I suggest you stay crose, unress you want to die at the hands, of herrspawn!" Takeo turned and fired his flamethrower at a hoard of zombies, in mere seconds, the hoard crumpled into a pile of smoldering corpses. Fluttershy shrieked, and nearly fainted, but Rarity held onto her just long enough for the fear to dissipate.
"Forrow me." Takeo said, taking out a ray gun. The duo looked at each other, clearly having little choices at hand, and followed the Japanese warrior.
"Okay... where is that stupid chest?" Richtofen said as he handled his Wunderwaffe. He decided to switch his guns and took out an MP40 instead. Outside of the doctors quarters, he saw a flash appear within the building and raised an eyebrow.
"Huh?"
That is your downfall, Edward...
"Shut up, shut up... must concentrate!" Richtofen said to himself to quiet the voices. He proceeded to look through the cracks in the door and listened in.
"What the... Pinkie, where are we, and where are the others?"
"I don't know... but my knee is really really pinchy, and... ear flop, eye flutter, knee twitch!"
Richtofen was confused, but decided to open the door.
"Twilight, hide!"
Some cluttering sounds were made, and the Doctor felt a rise in anxiety. He gave an evil chuckle, took out a knife, and walked into the side room.
"Come out, come out wherever you are... for you cannot hide... from the doctor, mwa ha ha ha ha." Richtofen grabbed a tarp and took it off, revealing a damaged canoe under it. Richtofen's 'Not amused' look told the tale and he continued his search.
"Hmm, wherever are you hiding, Frauleins? This swamp is not safe... ha ha... for the two of you... hahahaha..." Richtofen looked under the table and didn't find anyone. He was starting to get angry now. He stomped out of the room and looked over to see the Double Tap Root Beer machine was now working. He began to reach for it, and then he turned around and grabbed an arm.
"GOTCHA!" Richtofen brought his knife down to the mystery person, but stopped but a few millimeters shy of an injury when he saw what he was attacking. A pink pony, with a fearful look on her face. Richtofen gasped, this wasn't even a person at all.
Twilight looked fearfully at what the man was doing. He moved his arm and sheathed the knife he was holding. She closed her eyes in fear for what might happen next. To her surprise, something different happened.
"A CUTE LITTLE PONY! OH, IT IS SO CUTE!"
Twilight opened her eyes in confusion and looked to see the man, spinning with Pinkie in his arms, laughing.
"Wait, you're not going to kill her?"
"Of course not Fraulein, I can't hurt a cute little pony that's pink!"
"Hehe, that's really nice!" Pinkie spoke.
Richtofen gasped and held her tight. "And it talks too. Oh this is wunderbar!" Richtofen laughed and laughed. At this point, Twilight came out of hiding and saw the man in his entirety. Richtofen looked at Twilight and gave a big grin.
"And this one has wings and a horn, just like the fairy tales mother used to tell me when I was a kid." Richtofen's childhood dreams were coming true.
"You're a human..." Twilight said without thinking.
"Ja, and you're a pony. Nevermind that." Richtofen cleared his throat. "Hello, I am Doctor Richtofen, and we need to move. The minions, they are coming! And there are... NO, THE VOICES! THEY ARE GETTING LOUDER!"
"Twilight, my knee's still pinchy!" Pinkie said.
"What!?"
*AAAAHHHHHHHHHH*
The trio looked to see an entire hoard of zombies rushing into the hut. Richtofen took out his Wunderwaffe and fired at the group, killing them in a display of bright electrical power. Twilight and Pinkie were shocked and turned towards the Doctor.
"Nien, these are my ponies, mine own!" Richtofen yelled.
"Wait, I'm not anypony's pet!" Twilight yelled out annoyed.
"I am sorry, but now isn't the time. What are your names?"
"Twilight Sparkle."
"I'm Pinkie Pie, and I can tell we're are going to be bestest, best, friends forever!"
"Ha ha, me too. Quickly, we can make much progress!" Richtofen marched out of the room with the two ponies.
Tank could somewhat believe in zombies, and the fact that he was being attacked by them...
"Are we there yet?"
"No Rainbow, we're not. Now. Shut. UP!"
Colorful ponies were another thing altogether.
"Do you have to be so rude?" Celestia asked.
"At least you two don't have to wade in this swamp-shit."
"Why are you... nevermind, I just realized what we're in." Rainbow looked over to her side and saw a meteor. "Hey, what's that?"
Dempsey looked to his left and saw the large meteor. "Looks like a large-ass rock from space."
"You mean meteor."
"Whatever."
Celestia rolled her eyes and looked at the rock, and noticed something.
"Hey, isn't that..."
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
"FUCK! MOVE MARE-BITCHES!" Dempsey opened fire with his BAR and hit two zombies in the head.
"Didn't ya hear, I'm a crackshot!" The group of three ran off to the central building where they met the others.
"Okay, if Nikolai is right, you two are from alternate universe that has no humans..."
"Eeyup." Applejack responded.
"No guns..."
"Actually, we do, but we have very strict laws in controlling them." Luna corrected.
"Alright then, do you have vodka in your world?"
"Yes, we do."
"Then Nikolai will do good there."
"Please stop speakin' in third person, reminds me of a mare Ah don't like."
"Only if I get vodka."
MRRRRR!!!
"Oh crap, we need to go to... that center building... thingy!"
The two mares had no reason to argue, zombies were approaching the group, so they hightailed it to the center building.
Rarity, Fluttershy and Takeo were already at the center of Shi No Numa, so Takeo set some Bouncing Betties and hoped for the best.
"Do you think we're safe?" Fluttershy asked, hiding among the crates.
"No..."
"EEEP!"
"...but, a rong as I breath, I wirr not farter in combat, for it is the honorabre thing to do." Takeo tilted his head to receive a few gratifying and audible pops from his neck.
"Thank you so much Takeo, but this swamp water is very staining for my coat." Rarity complained.
"Swamp water is the... reast of your worries."
"Why?"
"TAKEO!"
"STUPID JAPANESE GUY!"
"TAK, TANK'S HERE!"
MAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
"That is why." Takeo took out his Flamethrower and tightened the napalm tube. He looked around and prepared for combat.
Richtofen flipped the switch and the zipline moved down. He looked at the purple alicorn and spoke.
"So, you're a princess?"
"Yes."
"You have magic?"
"Indeed."
"Und you are highly intelligent?"
"Well, I don't like to toot my own horn..."
"I will!" Pinkie took out a trumpet and played a rather cheery tune, in spite of what was happening.
"Ooo, it's catchy" Richtofen did a little jig at the tune.
"It is, but back to intelligence, I'm a very smart mare when it comes to magic. Now, I'd like to ask a few things about humans."
"Like what?" The three went onto the zipline and Richtofen hit the switch.
"What are your dietary needs?"
"Oh, vell, we have a variety of foodthings we can eat."
"Meat?" Pinkie asked while playing the trumpet, somehow.
"Oh JA! I really like Liverwurst, it has that good texture."
"Oh, what about physical capabilities?"
"Well, we have hands, und big brains, except Dempsey, he's shtupid."
"Who's Dempsey?"
"Oh..."
QQQRRRRR!!!
"OHHHHH, shit. We should run."
"Way ahead of you." Twilight used her magic to carry the two others downstairs.
"TAKEO!" Richtofen called out.
"NEXT TO THE FISHING HUT!" Takeo responded.
"FORGET THAT, THE BOX IS AT THE STORAGE HUT!" Dempsey yelled out.
"OKAY DEMPSEY, LET'S GO SO I CAN GET VODKA!" Nikolai responded.
"Drop me, I'll lead." Richtofen ordered. Twilight obliged and the German was in his feet. MP40 at hand, he ran off to the Storage Hut and noticed his teammates weren't the only ones that were running away. He'd figure it out later, they'd have to survive the hoards.
-5 minutes later-
"Okay, door is blocked, now to drink." Nikolai said, sitting on his ass and taking out a bottle of vodka to drink. The group of twelve were tired, and barely recognized each other, but once the mares relaxed a bit...
"Oh... oh lordy that was just plain scary." Applejack moaned, clearly tired from running so much.
"Heh, good thing I focused on cardio, eh guys?" Rainbow panted, clearly tired herself, but much less than most of the others.
"Indeed." Luna responded.
"Well I am so super-duper-luper-huper happy that we're all safe, and Celestia has a pink mane!"
"What?" Celestia could finally look at her own mane and finally notice that her mane had changed from the beautiful pink, cyan and sky blue mixture to a plain pink mane, this worried her.
"Oh no..."
"What's wrong princess?" Rarity asked.
"If my mane is plain pink, that must mean we're no longer in the presence of magic."
"WHAT!" All the mares unison-ed.
"HEY, KEEP IT DOWN, NIKOLAI HAS STUPID HEADACHE!"
"No wonder you couldn't..." Rainbow muttered under her breath.
"I want to go home. I want to go home." Fluttershy broke into tears and cried into Rarity's shoulder. Rarity wrapped a hoof around her friend and held onto her tight.
"Ugh, this moping isn't getting us anywhere." Rainbow said in a very annoyed tone.
"Well, in any case, we must get acquainted with these... humans if we are to survive." Luna said in a low tone.
"Alright sister, let's do it." Celestia said in a very serious tone.
The eight got up and noticed the Doctor looking on the ground for something. Dempsey was at a window with his MG42 and Takeo at the other with his Flamethrower. They decided on talking to the only one not working for some reason.
"Ahem, Nikolai, ya there?"
*SNRR* "Fuck you..."
Luna and Applejack looked at the other mares and smiled nervously.
"Seriously?" Rainbow folded her forelegs and gave a not amused look. Pinkie also seemed to agree and folded all four of her legs together, while still standing up for some strange reason.
"He... might be a tad strange." Luna admitted.
*SNA* "Fuck Takeo... he sucks balls..." *SNNN*
Rarity narrowed her eyes at the drunk.
"Those clothes, that smell, his drunkenness. He is filthy and uncouth!"
"You know what, Nikolai can hear every word you are saying, and so, fuck you unicorn, fuck you gay pony, fuck you too pink thing." Nikolai say, flipping the bird for each pony her mentioned. Rarity gave a very sharp gasp along with Pinkie. Rainbow face-hooved and sighed.
"Let's move on." Applejack quickly said. Pinkie and Rarity were completely offended and found themselves wanting to hurt the drunk. But Rarity was a lady, and Pinkie was not the violent type when it wasn't needed.
The eight moved to the closest person to Nikolai, Richtofen.
"Ahem, Doctor?"
"What is it Twilight? I am in the middle of a... Oh, I just realized, more ponies! JOOOOOOOOOOY!" Richtofen enunciated the last word, making it very high-pitched, even for the Doctor.
"Erm, right. My name is Princess Celestia, I see you've made good friends with my faithful student and her friend."
"Really now, so ze purple one was under your wing? No pun intended, I assure you." Richtofen bowed as he spoke.
"Right, Doctor, I've been wondering, what is your doctorate?"
"A hack one, that's for sure." Dempsey spoke out.
"Quiet Svindhund."
"Now hold on Doctor, Dempsey is the one who helped save my life, as well as one of my loyal subject's life."
"Oh really, well zen, he is not a dumbass after all. Now, if you could excuse me, zere is zis part I need, und I JUST FOUND IT!" Richtofen took a small rock, similar to the meteor Celestia saw outside in material.
"Soon, zey vill FEAR ME!"
"AHH!" Fluttershy dashed off to hide behind Takeo, who just looked at the others with mild confusion.
"Vas is somezing I said?"
"Yes Doctor, it was." Celestia could tell from the deepest part of gut feeling that Richtofen was up to no good. Without strong magic however, she would have to deal with his behavior, begrudgingly.
"We should move on." Twilight said, clearly creeped out by Richtofen's sudden outburst. Celestia moved her muzzle closer to Twilight's ear and whispered something.
"Twilight, I do not trust the doctor, stay away from him."
Twilight raised an eyebrow and moved her muzzle to Celestia's ear.
"With all due respect Celestia, I honestly don't believe you."
"What?" Celestia said, letting Richtofen hear it.
"He's a real nice and intelligent man, he cannot be all that bad."
"Twilight, I have dealt with ponies like him before, trust me."
"I... honestly do not, with all due respect."
Richtofen smiled.
Celestia seems to understand who I truly am, while Twilight is the naive dummkopf who is going to do everything I tell her to do.
This will be fun.
The regal duo moved away from each other, not believing how they could just end up arguing like that. Celestia could see it as clear as day, Richtofen was manipulating her. Twilight couldn't understand why Richtofen seemed so bad. He and her, they seemed to be so similar. What could make his evil, besides an occasional moan from being splattered in the blood of the undead of course?
The eight moved on to Takeo, who looked attentively at the others.
"何をもたらしますか?" Takeo spoke.
"What? Stop speakin' fancy and speak in our langauge." Applejack said.
"What brings you here?"
"We just want you introduce yourself Takeo. PLEASE?" Rarity fluttered her eyelashes at the Japanese man, who understood what she meant.
"I am warrior, I am honorabre, that is arr you need to know." Takeo turned towards the window and noted a distinct lack of zombies there.
"Seriously? You're so boring." Rainbow had an uninterested look on her face.
"Rainbow, how dare you? Takeo is a kind, caring person. He saved Rarity and me from zombies, twice. Say you're sorry." Fluttershy said, being assertive.
"How about, shut up! I am having hangover, and I am low on vodka." Nikolai yelled out, throwing the empty bottle away, shattering it.
"Oh dear." Luna said in a low voice, Takeo noticed however.
"Nikorai, a dishonorabre, firthy man."
"Agreed Takeo." Rarity said, with charm, and with a hint of what Nikolai swore was smartass.
"Wait, Nikolai is much more than a disgusting man, he truly cares for his country." Luna called out.
"HOOAH! Серебро на моей стороне! Давайте пить." Nikolai said, getting up to cheer her on. Celestia, however, used whatever magic she had to pick up the others and walked towards Dempsey instead.
"This isn't over." Luna said. Takeo nodded, gaining resentment against the moon deity.
The eight finally got to Dempsey, who looked over the others and spoke.
"Alright, here's the deal, don't fuck with me, and you'll get my help."
"Understood Tank!" Rainbow saluted.
"Ya know, ya don't have ta use that there language ya'll are usin'." Applejack pointed out.
"What do you know, you're a hick." Dempsey aimed his gun out the window.
"Now wait just a gosh darn minute, I ain't no hick!"
"Double negative, that means you're a hick." Dempsey said.
"Oh look, Dempshey isn't a dumbass after all again, haha. You are still a dummkopf Dempshey."
"Fuck you Kraut." Dempsey flipped the bird at the German, which finally set off Twilight.
"Hey, you don't insult my friends like that!"
"I just did." Dempsey said, raising an eyebrow at the fact that there were no zombies.
"You insulted my friend Applejack, and then you insulted Richtofen..."
"I don't give a shit about Dicktofen."
"Why you..."
"Twilight, enough!" Celestia spoke with regal authority.
"But Princess..."
"No buts, you are royalty, and should act like it, and royalty do not insult anypony in public."
"Yeah, apologize." Dempsey said in a smug tone.
"We need to leave." Richtofen said.
"Why?" Nikolai asked.
"No reason, let's go." Richtofen pulled a single marble from the bottom of the pile, causing it to crash down and promptly ran out the door. The others looked at the room itself and saw fog appearing. Dogs barking and howling filled the air as they started to appear.
"All my life I've been debating, All the crows, they sit there waiting Wondering what I'm going to eat. Until I have it, I can't sleep. I finally see you on the floor, Your heart's not beating any more. My lust for you just can not wait. Your skin, it tastes like chocolate. Staring blankly at the sun, Waiting for my time to come. Your happy life, it makes me sick, All the screaming sounds like music."
"Lucid are my pooling dreams, Someone tell me what they mean. There's an iron smell of blood in the air, but I can't find it anywhere."
"I've been waiting for someone To find me and become a part of me."
"Part of me."
"I've been waiting for you to come here And kill me and set me free..."
"I've been waiting for..."
"Blood's flavor is so metallic, It's smell makes me go fanatic... Texture that I find in you is as thick as viscous glue..."
"My senses have become so keen, With all I touch and all I see. There's an iron smell of blood in the air, And now I see it everywhere. "
"I've been waiting for someone To find me and become a part of me."
"Become part of me."
"I've been waiting for you to come here And kill me and set me free."
"I've been waiting for the one."
"I've been waiting for the one."
"The one."
"I've been waiting for someone..."
"I've been waiting for you to come here and kill me, And set me free."
"I've been waiting for..."
"I've been waiting for you to come here and kill me..."
As the twelve ran for their lives, finally camped out near the top of main cabin and armed up. Dempsey brought out his MG42, knowing that this piece of German engineering would do him good. Nikolai took out a PPsH-41 submachine gun, trusting Soviet reliability. Takeo took out his Ray Gun, still a bit unsure of its properties himself. Richtofen took out his Wunderwaffe DG-2, fully aware of what he can do with it.
And then it appeared. It appeared to be a fully grown dog, but it was covered in soot and fire, and it smelled of brimstone. It sniffed the air and looked at the warriors.
"Is zat... nein... zey are using ze poor, innocent puppies." Richtofen said with a hint of sorrow.
"What!?"
"Hey, you two gonna mope, 'cause these bitches are trying to attack us!" Dempsey opened fire on the Hellhound, causing it to explode in a sulfur-induced cloud.
"I will miss zem, I truly will." Richtofen took out his MP-40, more to save ammo for what he thought was the best weapon for a better situation rather than any other reason.
Several dogs blew up, ash covering the four warriors. One last dog dashed forward.
BWANG!
Takeo fired a shot from his Ray Gun at the last Hellhound, killing it. In its place came a floating golden box with a green glow around it. The mares weren't sure what to think about it really. The others...
"A max ammo, everyone, reroad." Takeo said, with everyone agreeing and reloading their weapons.
"What is that?" Twilight asked.
"Ze best power-up zat occasionally pops up out of novhere, I don't know how, but who cares?"
"One of the few things I'm gonna agree with you Dicktofen." Dempsey said, finishing his reload. He reached out and grabbed the box, and in a flash, it disappeared.
The humans hefted their weapons to make sure they were topped off. The magic users of the group suddenly felt... empowered.
"Woah, I do not know how, but I feel full of energy!" Rarity said.
Celestia looked at a nearby pool of blood and wiped away the maggots. She soon saw it, the multicolored mane.
"Humans, that 'Max Ammo' you got has engorged us with magic, we can fight now!" Celestia yelled.
"Great, and... what the hell happened to your..."
"That's not important at the moment, right now, we need to leave this place."
"Ja, I already got vhat I... I mean, this place is too dangerous, we need to find a boat or somezing, JA!" Almost revealed my plan for a moment zere, have to be careful from now on. Richtofen looked around and ran down the stairs. Celestia raised an eyebrow, but decided that last-second word swap wasn't important now, surviving was.
"Ret's go." Takeo said, taking out his flamethrower and going down the stairs. Everyone else followed, but Richtofen...
"Follow me, I zink zere's a vay away from zis shithole... und ze swamp."
"Was that an insult?" Dempsey asked.
"Maybe, maybe not." Richtofen said with a smug tone.
"How can y'all stand each other?" Applejack said as she shook her head.
"We don't, but with zombies, we need each other. And vodka too."
"Unfortunatery." Takeo muttered.
"Ja, good." Richtofen said in an unamused monotone. "Follow me."
"And why should we?" Celestia asked.
"Because... shut up."
"Hey!"
"Sorry Twilight. Let us move!" Richtofen said, arm extended and the group went to the Fishing Hut.
"Huh, what does this doohickey do?" Applejack pulled a nearby lever and the Flogger turned on. And entire hoard soon came from the building and were smacked away to their deaths by the machine.
"HAHA, the hick did something right for once!" Dempsey yelled, garnering a dirty look from AJ.
"Forget it AJ, let's move!" Rainbow dashed through, leaving a rainbow trail behind. Takeo looked at the marine.
"What! Just because her colors are queer, doesn't mean she's queer, and by extension, me." Dempsey defended himself.
"Sure you're not." Takeo said calmly before walking into the hut. Rainbow hovered next to the marine with an angry look.
"You want me to hurt him?"
"No, he's too badass. Besides, we need a guy no one likes to make the others look more awesome by comparison."
"Huh, you think that applies to us?"
"Depends, first glances can make all the difference."
"Fine." The two went into the cabin and saw Richtofen try to pry to boards off of the floor.
"Whatcha you doing?" Pinkie asked Richtofen.
"Trying to pry off the floorboards."
"Why?"
"It's a secret."
"Why is it a secret?"
"Because it is something that only I should fully know. Now, promise me you von't ask anymore questions vhile ve are here."
"I'll do better, I'll Pinkie Promise!"
"Vhat?"
"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!" Pinkie recited, before planting her hoof in her eye.
"OHOHOHO, zat is so funny, zank you Pinkie Pie, you are ze best pony!"
"I am, aren't I!"
Oh... he is... frightening, especially when he's pretending to like Pinkie and Twilight... EEP! Fluttershy thought to herself, thinking that that was what Richtofen was doing.
*CRCCK!*
"Ahh, good!" Richtofen looked down to see a hidden tunnel opening. He grabbed the handle and gave a mighty heave, opening the door.
"And just how did you know that was there?" Dempsey asked.
"Lucky guess." Richtofen lied. Applejack raised an eyebrow. Normally, she could tell clear as day who was lying, but the way he spoke make it seem like it was foggy that day. She had no idea whether he was lying or telling selective truths.
"Let's go." Richtofen motioned the others to follow. He went first, holding a Luger he had earlier to defend himself. Takeo took out his Ray Gun and went next. Nikolai took out an empty vodka bottle and climbed down himself. Dempsey brought out his knife and began his decent.
"You mares coming?" Tank yelled out before climbing out of view. Rainbow and Fluttershy decided to go first, followed By Twilight carrying Rarity with her. Pinkie let Applejack hop on her back the two climbed down. Luna was about to hop down, but...
"Sister, Richtofen is up to something, I can sense it."
"As do I sister, but with these creatures running about, his plans are doomed to fail because of this. Right now, we take his word for it." Luna spread her wings and flapped them down the hole. Celestia was still skeptical, and her mane was turning pink again, so she had to go with Luna for this one. She went down the hole and used her magic to close it.
"Okay, it is dark here, just like home." Nikolai said.
"Okay zen, vhere is zat... Ohh, I zink I found one." Richtofen grabbed something and pulled.
"AHH!"
*SMCK!*
"OUCH!"
"Don'tcha pull on Mah tail like that!" Applejack yelled.
"HA HA, sweet!" Dempsey laughed.
"Dempshey, I hate you. I hate your sthupid voice."
"Right back at you."
"Wait, let me try something." Twilight used her magic to create a glow, which illuminated the room.
"Ah, zank you Twilight. I can now flip this switch." Richtofen said, just before pulling his hand away from Dempsey's groin. No one noticed, thankfully. Richtofen pulled on a power switch and the room's lights turned on. It was a concrete room, devoid of much furniture, save for a machine on one end of the room. Richtofen approached it and pulled on a tab.
"What... is that?" Rainbow was breathless at the machine.
"Zis is a Matter Transference Device, or MTD for short. It is... plain and simple, a teleporter."
"Wait, an artificial teleporter?" Luna was amazed herself at the machine.
"Ja, und now ve are getting ze fuck out of dodge! Everypony into ze teleporter!" Richtofen slammed the panel after putting the rock in. Everyone did so, but there were legitimate concerns.
"Are you sure... that this is safe for Nikolai?" Nikolai asked.
"I am 35% sure zat zis vill work. 50% says zat it breaks, 15% says zat it vill vaporize us to death."
"Wait... what? Did I hear that right?" Rarity asked, hoping that he was joking.
"Nikolai likes those odds."
"Ja, say goodbye to zis swamp." Richtofen turned on the teleporter and it began to surround the twelve in electricity.
"GOODBYE SWAMP!" Pinkie yelled.
"Ah, shut up, you making hangover worse!" Nikolai yelled, holding his head in pain.
"Now don'tcha talk to me like that, foo!" Pinkie said, snapping her non-existent fingers repeatedly, somehow, to sass the drunk.
"I can tell that this won't end well." Twilight muttered.
"Agreed." Rarity simply said, before the device finished.
A flash appeared near the center of device. When it dissipated, four humans and eight ponies were standing in the middle.
"Woah, where are we?" Dempsey asked.
"Oh, I do not feel well." Nikolai clenched his stomach before throwing up on the floor.
"Zat is normal my friend." Richtofen assured the rest of the group.
"Whatever... I c-can... oh Celestia!" Rainbow Dash dashed behind the machine and vomited herself. Nikolai approached the machine himself and noted something.
"This machine must polish big balls. Sorry guys, this will be worthless to you, because you have no balls, heh heh." Nikolai saw the unamused looks of the others... and just ignored them, taking to another drink from his vodka once more.
"Hmm, seems rike our guns... disappeared into thin air." Takeo said with wide eyes, or at least, as wide as an Asian man's eyes could widen.
"Aww shit, Tak's right, all we got are these crapass guns." Dempsey held out his M1911 handgun, clearly annoyed at the sudden bad luck.
"Shit, at least my... OH NO, I'm low on vodka!" Nikolai looked in horror as he saw that he had only two bottles of vodka left.
Rarity sighed at the drunkard's idiocy. Oh how she wished she was at home, in her own high thread count bedsheets, resting her heavy eyes. Her mane was disheveled, her make-up was starting to smudge from the constant sweating and was to the point of exhaustion. She wanted to cry, she wanted to be alone, she wanted to be back home. Two hours in this strange new world and already she knew that this was hell.
"I miss Sweetie Belle... I miss mother and father... I even miss Spike..."
"Who?" Takeo asked.
"Spike is my assistant, a dragon." Twilight answered.
"A dragon! Ohh, sounds honorabre."
"And Sweetie Belle is my sister. Oh, she must be crying her poor little eyes out right now, worried for me, maybe thinking I'm... dead." Rarity broke down here and there and began to sob loudly.
"Ahh, shut up with waterworks, you're making headache worse!" Nikolai complained.
"Nikolai, Ah know ya don't like Rares but ya gotta give her a break. Can't ya realized she's down and under?" Applejack said, taking off her hat.
"Umm... what answer might get me more vodka?"
Applejack deadpanned, and just went up to her friend and held her tight. The others did the same, and they all wanted the same thing.
"We have to go home." Luna said simply.
The scene would be moving, but Dempsey was more annoyed than touched, Nikolai didn't care because he was drunk, Takeo had a stone cold face, and Richtofen...
"Okay zen, zat vas moving. So how about we split up? Takeo, his friends, mien friends, und I go right, und ze rest of the group und Dempshey go left. Sound Wunderbar?" Richtofen finished by clapping his hands together.
"Sounds good to Nikolai!"
Applejack wasn't too keen on going with Dempsey, especially after so many times of being called a hick by him during the short time they spent together, but she was willing to suck it up and deal with it, like a real Apple family member would.
Fluttershy on the other hand was absolutely terrified of Richtofen. His sick, twisted sense of humor, his insatiable bloodlust, and his tone. His strange comments towards Nikolai were just plain strange however. She took a big gulp and tried to speak up.
"Umm, I... I don't w-want to go w-with Richtofen... He's..."
"Alright, so long as I don't have to see your face, Dicktofen." Dempsey replied.
"Does anypony hear me?"
"Ja, let's go now. SCHNELL! VAUS, VAUS!" Richtofen yelled out, running to the right door. Pinkie and Twilight broke their hug to go with him. Applejack and Luna broke their hug to go with Nikolai. Celestia and Rainbow Dash hovered over to Dempsey and the three nodded in almost perfect synchronization. Rarity looked over to Fluttershy, her closest friend and smiled. The two went to Takeo, but Fluttershy was very nervous around Richtofen.
*SAM!*
Dempsey, Nikolai, Celestia, Luna, Rainbow Dash and Applejack went into the building and saw a not too surprising amount of destruction.
"This is still cleaner than home." Nikolai mused.
"Just how much more disgusting can you be?" Rainbow asked, annoyed.
"I have been wearing same pair of underwear for two months now."
"Oh, sorry I asked..." Rainbow gagged, but she kept her lunch down well.
"Wow Nikolai, that's disgusting." Dempsey said as he brought an M1897 Trench Gun from the wall.
"And your underwear isn't?"
"I'm going commando now, fatass."
"Commando?" Luna looked to her sister, who shrugged herself.
"I'm not wearing any underwear."
"Pff, who needs 'em?" Applejack said to herself.
*GAHHGAHH*
"Aww crap, I knew it!" Dempsey ran over to the nearest window and sure enough, a wave of zombies were breaking down the set up boards. He aimed his shotgun and fired, killing two at once and wounding another.
"Oh, I'm sorry you died, NOT!" Dempsey pumped the slide and fired again, killing the last zombie.
"Let us go forward, comrades!" Nikolai yelled, running to the blocked staircase and smashing into it. Celestia sighed and used her magic to move the junk out of the way.
"Let's go!" The group of six ran off and came to the raised bridge and saw the other six across it.
"Umm, this might hurt mighty." Applejack nervously inched towards the edge of the broken handrail.
*ERAAAAHHH*
"Ah, forgit it!" The two humans and four ponies jumped down, feeling the pops in their knees as they landed, they saw the other six jump down from the edge of their broken handrail.
"So, how's your story?" Rainbow Dash asked Twilight.
"Pretty bad, not so surprising."
"Mind telling us?"
"Later, pull ze switch, Dumkoffes!" Richtofen yelled as he aimed his Thompson at an oncoming horde of zombies. Celestia ran behind the generator and had a look of confused horror.
"Is that... a hand?!"
"I don't know Fraulein, pull it up or some shit!"
As Celestia pushed the switch up, Fluttershy turned around to see a zombie about to attack. In a state of fear, she locked up, and saw her life flash before her eyes.
-5 minutes ago-
Fluttershy, Twilight, Pinkie Pie and Rarity all walked into the factory and saw various junk lying on the ground.
"This place is a mess." Rarity muttered out loud.
"Ja, und all because of zombies. So not wunderbar." Richtofen replied.
"Hmm, you think we can turn this junk into super cool stuff?" Pinkie suggested.
"We could, but ve don't have ze time, patience, or skills."
"Hmm, can we do it on the go?" Twilight asked.
"Maybe not, but we can at reast buy that gun there." Takeo said, pointing to the Thompson submachine gun outline on the wall. Richtofen put his hand to it and got the weapon in his hands.
"Oh, I can't wait to fire this. Oh, ze blood vill spill... all over mein face... Ja." Richtofen moaned, bringing Fluttershy to shock and fear.
"What's wr..." Rarity was soon met with a blur suddenly hiding behind her from the doctor.
"Honestly, can't you just trust me, I'm a doctor!"
"NO, you're scary!" Fluttershy yelled, although her quiet voice made it sound like Pinkie Pie was talking.
"Ohh, Fraulein... scary doesn't even begin to describe me." Richtofen keep his tone low and genuinely fear-inducing. Fluttershy locked up, and couldn't move.
"Oh my, look at her face."
"DOCTOR, please apologise to Fluttershy!" Twilight chastised the doctor.
"Umm, zat, can wait."
*SAAAAAAAAAA...AAAM*
"RUN EVERYPONY!" Pinkie screamed as she pushed the debris away from the top of the staircase. The six saw the other six inching towards the edge of the broken handrail.
*ERAAAAHHH*
"JUMP!" Rarity yelled, with little objection. The six felt their knees pop and were squinting in pain, but adrenaline was high, so they shrugged it off.
*SPRCKCK*
Fluttershy felt something hit her face. She put a hoof to it and felt...
"B-B-B-Blood?!"
"Ja, it is, und it splattered all over you, not ME!" Richtofen opened fire at the undead. Takeo readed for the box and the weapons cycled. What came up was a cymbal monkey, with dynamite attached to the back.
"Is it year of the monkey?" Takeo asked as he grabbed the strange toy.
"Hey look, Takeo is fucking a monkey!" Nikolai taunted, garnering dirty looks from Rarity and Takeo.
"Ignore him, he is drunk." Takeo suggested.
"Agreed."
Dempsey hit the chest, and saw a good surprise.
"Guess Santa got my letter this year." Dempsey said as he grabbed the Ray gun, replacing his M1911.
"Vell, zat is nice Dempshey, but ve just finished."
"What?" Dempsey looked to see the horde was finished off. Everyone soon relaxed as they reloaded their weapons.
Nikolai sighed and looked at a shot glass full of vodka.
"Последний напиток, жалость." Nikolai downed it and saw the box had given him a molotov cocktail.
"I have better weapons at my pig farm." Nikolai grabbed the weapons, clearly unhappy.
"They're almost here." Luna said, sensing the horde coming again.
"HAHA, Takeo was fucked by teddy bear." Nikolai mocked.
"Ja, und now ve need to find it!" Richtofen then had a thought.
"Let's try und activate zat zing in ze center... zing."
"Nikolai can understand that."
"How though?" Twilight asked.
"Maybe we need to rink the tereporters." Takeo suggested.
"Sounds like a plan, Tak." Dempsey agreed.
"Alright, let's find 'em!" Rainbow took off to the air, before suddenly feeling sick and falling down.
"RAINBOW!!!" The mares rushed to her, and then Richtofen realized something.
"Ze element... it is too high in ze air."
"What?" Celestia wondered.
"It must be ze air, it is too toxic, ve vill need to go by land."
"Are you kidding me?" Rainbow said, struggling to get up.
"No, split up, open ze doors. Takeo, stay near ze center vith you fruends. Dempshey, you und ze rest of your stchupid fruends link zat teleporter. Nikolai, my friend, go to ze one closest to ze mainframe."
Everyone agreed, but...
"How do you know so much, Edward?"
"Oh, um..."
*AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH*
"Now is not ze time, move!"
The four groups split up. Dempsey went to the nearest teleporter with Celestia and Rainbow.
"How do we activate this?"
"I dunno, flip switches!" Dempsey yelled as the zombies ran into the factory.
"Fuck!"
*BRI BRP*
"You have 25 seconds to link to the main frame."
"25 seconds is all we got?"
*BRI BRP*
"Huh, Tak did it."
*Wrrrrrr*
CLR CKR CKL CRL CKRL CLR CKRRR CRK
A flash, and the three disappeared.
"Okay, so... how do we work this bitch?" Nikolai said, fumbling with the controls for the teleporter.
"I do not know." Luna plainly said.
"Great, I will just drink instead."
"How 'bout this?"
*BRI BRP*
"You have 25 seconds to link to the main frame."
"Ugh, now we have run to mainframe? So much fucking running!"
*BRI BRP*
"Hey-ey, the Japanese guy actually did it, whatshisface!"
*Wrrrrrr*
CLR CKR CKL CRL CKRL CLR CKRRR CRK
"Ehh, wait, won't I get..."
A flash interrupted the drunk, taking the three to the mainframe.
*BRI BRP*
"You have 25 seconds to link to the main frame."
"Now to let Takeo do ze vork."
"Edward, are you sure this thing works?" Pinkie asked.
"Positive, I am sure of it, more so zen ze first one."
"Good." Twilight said.
*BRI BRP*
The teleporter heated up, and then the group ended up with the others, who, to be honest, couldn't be more sick.
"AWW, the second time's worse!" Rainbow said before vomiting over the railing.
A power-up appeared across the field, a nuke.
"I got it!" Pinkie rushed to the power-up, where the zombies were climbing over the fence.
"Pinkie, are you... MMph!"
"Nien, let her." Richtofen told Twilight.
Pinkie almost realized that it was suicidal, but...
"KABOOM!!!"
Zombie heads blew up left and right, and the four soldiers looked at the machine.
"ME FIRST!!!"
"NIEN, ME!!!"
"I CARRED IT FIRST!!!"
"FUCK YOU, I'M FIRST!!!"
Rarity could only stare at the stupidity that was these four trying to stuff themselves into a small, cramped place, and use some machine!
"How we came to be with these people is beyond me."
"Me too." Twilight replied, just as baffled at the display.
"HAHA, Nikolai got Reaper!"
"I have a Gibs-O-Matic!"
"Yeah Tak, well I have a better Wonder Waffle!"
"Vell, I have a Reaper too!"
*RAGH* *SAM*
"Uh oh, this ain't good." Rainbow said, looking around too see the group surrounded by zombies.
"We need to move!"
The twelve survivors ran and ran, and went to the farthest teleporter, and began a last stand.
"EAT SHIT, ZOMBIES!!!"
"FOR THE RED ARMY!!!"
"BONZAIIIIIIII!!!"
"HAHAHA, HAHAHA, NYAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Fluttershy, in a moment of fear, hit the teleporter switch. As the electricity danced around them, the Wunderwaffe DG-3 JZ began to have a lot of electricity dance around it.
"Umm, what?"
"Oh, zat isn't good." Richtofen said with panic.
"Are we going to blow up?"
"Umm, maybe." Twilight answered Nikolai.
"Well... shit."
The Mane Six screamed at the top of their lungs while Celestia, Richtofen and Luna could only look in horror at this disaster.
"Why do we seem, older?" Luna asked, looking Takeo, who seem to have a aged a bit, now sporting a mustache, and was nauseous.
"Hmm... Ahh, yes of course, ze DG-2 must have overloaded ze teleporter, ripping space-time, back-tracing us across to ze future! Ohh Wünderbar! A-HA!"
Takeo then throws up, dropping Nikolai's vodka.
"There is my vodka! Thank you, Takeo."
"Oh look, you finally did something proper. Good for you Nikolai." Rarity remarked.
"Fuck you." Nikolai took a drink.
"Oh come on Tak, suck it up and walk it off." Dempsey said.
"But now I have ask something." Twilight started.
"What?" Applejack replied.
New Worldz, Complete Hell By Awesomedude17
"Are we safe?"
The group was now inside a run down cinema, destroyed by age and neglect. A swastika banner was still up on one side, but another was downed. Rainbow looked to her right and saw something familiar.
"Quick Revive? What does it taste like?"
"Were you not going to ask about why it is named that?" Nikolai said, clearly stupid drunk now.
"Pretty obvious."
"We will not know, this does not work." Luna kicked the machine.
"Zat because ze power is out, again!" Richtofen pointed out.
"Yeah, who forgot to pay electric bill?" Nikolai replied. "Was it the white pony things?"
"I'll have you know, we could not even pay for something if we've only been in this world for..." Rarity's eyes turned to prinpicks and her ears dropped. "How far did we go?"
"Hard to say." Richtofen rubbed his chin.
"Bah, doesn't matter, ve need to activate ze teleporter, if zere is one here."
*MRRRAAAGH!*
At that sound, the twelve 'living' beings perked up, and deadpanned.
"N-n-not ag-g-gain." Fluttershy said, locked in fear.
"Do not worry, Fruttershy, I wirr protect you." Takeo drew his Colt M1911 and aimed at a window. The other three humans did the same.
Several rounds later, they opened the door to the balcony area. Right there, in front of them, was the box.
"Weeeell, ain't it our lucky day!" Dempsey opened the box, and received strange weapon.
"What the fuck is this?" Dempsey grabbed it. It was an AUG.
"A gun." Celestia replied.
"Yeah, but most guns don't have the mag behind the trigger, or a scope on it."
"Let Nikolai go!" Nikolai opened the box and got an FN FAL.
"FN FAL? I love this FN gun! Get it? Cause it's a FN? Like... fuck!"
"Uhh, yes, I get it Nikolai." Pinkie said, with a look that clearly said 'not funny.'
"Hmm..." Takeo opened the box, and got a Thundergun.
"Nature's fury, packed into a tube."
Richtofen opened the box, and got a...
"A crossbow?" Luna asked.
"Huh, vhy a primative veapon? Vait, vhat is zis on ze point?"
"Who cares Dicktofen?" Celestia gave an amused look at Dempsey's remark and at this point, was beginning to really like the marine.
"Me next!" Nikolai literally shoved his hand into the box and pulled out an HK21.
"Beware comrades, I am armed and drunk."
"Eeyup!" Applejack nodded.
Takeo, somewhat abrasive on opening the box again, grabbed an M14, only to realise that it didn't have much to offer.
"Aw fuck, stupid teddy bear."
"Why has no one tried nailing this thing to the ground?"
"Zat is und good idea, but do ve have nails now?"
"He has a point." Twilight said, agreeing with Richtofen.
"Umm, guys..." Rainbow pointed at an entire horde of zombies, running their way.
"Oh look, more zombies. MOVE!!!" Dempsey yelled as he ran to the nearest door and opened it. The others soon opened the doors that was blocking their way until they ended up backstage.
"Did... anyone... see that there... rock there?"
"That was a part of the meteor, maybe they store that from Japan." Takeo said.
"Oh look, power switch." Nikolai pulled up the switch and the curtains drew. The projector opened and the entire area was now engorged with power.
"The film must have been shit, there are a lot of stiffs here."
*GRAGH GRAAWW GRRRR*
"Ohhh, a great monster must be attacking the theater." Takeo said.
And then the ceiling was broken through. Several mutant creatures crawled down, much to the surprise of the other.
"That's new." Dempsey said.
"These must the failed experiments Doctor Maxis was talking about."
"Failed experiments?" Celestia asked.
"Oh lordy, this ain't good." Applejack prepared for a fight with her friends, and rivals.
"Oh, these things smell, like fourth wife. She pretty though. Pretty and smelly, that is like Rarity, pretty weird combo if you ask Nikolai."
"No one can see me and I've lost all feeling And now I know I won't die alone."
"I'll stop you from breathing and all your deceiving and this house is not my own!"
"No!" "More forgiveness." "No!" "And the reason is I know I won't die alone."
"I have returned!"
"Everyone dies, and everyone lies, they're waiting for the second coming again."
"Everyone tries to hold onto their lives, when no one's alive, bring me 115!"
"You stand for nothing and overlooked something." "I'll bring you down, all on my own."
"I'm the end I can taste it, I'll justify hatred."
"I am the chosen one, left hand of all that's sacred!"
"No!" "More forgiveness." "No!" "I'll bring you death and pestilence. I'll bring you down on my own."
"I have returned!"
"And everything dies, look to the skies." "To see the end of all creation again."
"See with your eyes, my army of flies." "When no one's alive bring me 115!"
"I've lost all form and unity." "Where has my life gone?" "I'll bring you doom that you can see and bring you down to see you bleed."
"Everyone dies, and everyone lies." "They're waiting for the second coming again."
"Everyone tries to hold on to their life."
"When no one's alive bring me 115!"
"And everything dies, look to the skies." "To see the end of all creation again."
"See with your eyes, my army of flies." "When no one's alive Bring me 115!"
"And nobody cries when everyone dies and no one's alive" "Bring me 1-1-5!"
The teleported did it, it broke down after repeated usage. There was no way out now, except...
"We should take the windows out." Twilight said.
"Sure, but ve von't know vhat is out zere."
"Do we have a choice?" Luna said.
"I do not think so, I am almost out of vodka."
"Then we will get out of here." Rarity said with gusto.
"HAI!" Takeo replied.
"Then let's get the fuck out of here." Dempsey kicked down the door with Applejack.
"Not bad, hick."
"Shut up Dempsey."
"Ja, shut up."
"No, you shut up, Dicktofen."
"Okay, we need to leave, now!" Rainbow looked around a corner and saw some... humans.
"Hey look!"
Dempsey came over and looked over.
"Wait, they're carrying heat." Dempsey said. At that moment, the soldiers shot some undead that came close to them. Some of the figures seemed to be human, and they were shot too.
"Und zey are shooting ze zombies, und some humans zat vere inside."
"So, we will be killed by either zombies, or your own kind, Richtofen?" Celestia asked.
"Nein, a tank, zat vill do."
"What's a tank?" Twilight asked.
"That's a tank." Dempsey said, pointing to an old Russian tank left over in the middle of the street.
"Da, it is Russian, good weapon." Nikolai said with a smile.
"So, can we make it work, spic and span?" Applejack asked.
"I can." Dempsey said.
"You?"
"In the marines, I was part of a tank crew."
"Oh, the irony." Takeo said under his breath.
"Zen do it my friend."
"Alright, give me a few hours." Dempsey said as he cracked his knuckles.
When are we exactly? Celestia thought, as he looked over to Richtofen, who was looking like he is planning something.
*Edmund, stop fooling around and contain these zombies!*
*I cannot help it, killing these things is almost better than sex!*
*You need help.*
*Ahh, screw you, these things aren't getting through. What would get through, idiots?*
At that point, both soldiers began to hear something.
*What was that Josef?*
*It's a tank, stop worrying.*
*Yes, I know it's a tank, but that doesn't sound like any other tank I've heard.*
*What are you blabbering about, you fool?*
*Wait, look!*
Edmund and Josef looked over to the contained area, and saw, a Russian TT-33 tank.
And it was moving towards them, crushing zombies, and attracting them too.
*Oh crap, get the radio and call for reinforcements!* Josef yelled.
*Yes!*
At that point, the tank broke through and was now loose.
New Worldz, Complete Hell By Awesomedude17
"Woohoo, fucking A++, bitches!" Dempsey yelled as he operated the tank with expect precision.
"Ohh, ahh, Nikolai does not feel good."
"Don't you dare vomit, especially onto me." Rarity said in disgust.
"Richtofen, I found a radio." Takeo yelled over the noise.
"Wunderbar, let me see."
Richtofen fiddled with the knobs until he came to an all-German broadcast.
"Huh, let me hear zis."
Ein russischer Panzer gesehen wurde rasend schnell verbreitet in Berlin. Weder der Sowjetunion, der DDR, noch Westen Deutschland erklären, dass dies eine Schulung und Beratung aller Bürger zu bleiben drinnen, und vermeiden Sie den Kontakt mit der Besatzung.
"What is that, Edward?" Celestia asked.
"Oh, apparently ve are vanted, hmm..." Richtofen wasn't feeling joyous this time, much to the surprise of Dempsey.
"I thought you'd want to do this shit!"
"Yeah, this is awesome!" Rainbow yelled out.
"Ja, but I prefer to mein kills to be..." Richtofen stopped, trying to find a word.
"B-b-b-brutal?" Fluttershy asked, fear still dripping from her voice.
"Nein, but zat vas a gut guess."
"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!" Fluttershy hid wherever she could, but the cramped space of the tank was not good for hiding.
"Not on my watch, Fruttershy." Takeo said, drawing an LAW rocket launcher.
*Whap whap whap whap whap*
"What the crap is that sound?" Dempsey asked no one in particular.
Twilight decided to open the hatch, and peek out.
She soon saw a massive device, not unlike Pinkie Pie's flight device. Twilight closed the hatch, and stared at the others.
"Flying thing that has no wings."
"Like a helicopter?" Pinkie Pie asked, confusing the others.
"Something I made before all of this, way before. It got wrecked."
"Heh, like fourth marriage. I fucking hate that bitch, and stripper."
Pinkie glared at the drunk.
"Werr, I wirr destroy this monstrosity!" Takeo took his LAW, went out the hatch, locked onto the heli, and fired. He went back in, closed the hatch and waited.
*BRMM*
All they heard was the Tank moving, the whaping stopped.
"So, did we get it?" Nikolai asked no one in particular.
"I hope..."
*CRRSH*
"Nevermind." Twilight put on a deadpan look on her face.
"Whoo, it is hot in here." Richtofen decided to take off his jacket.
"You better not get buck nude in here, Richtofen." Dempsey yelled in his usual tone.
"Now vhy vould I do zat?" Richtofen lied, stripping down to his underwear.
"You, you just stripped down to your undergarments." Luna replied incredulously.
"No I didn't." You can guess what happened.
"God dammit Dicktofen, put some fucking pants on!" Dempsey didn't even look towards the German in fears of become blind by his worst ally's... virility.
"Is good thing I have vodka." Nikolai said as he downed the entire bottle in his hand.
"Oh, I wirr not forget this for many a year!" Takeo yelled in disgust.
"Vhatever, I feel vunderbar!"
"Get some damn pants." Dempsey said in a stern tone. "As a matter of fact, put yours on!"
"Umm, nein, I just... lost zem." Richtofen said as he threw his clothes out the cockpit, while facing Nikolai, who passed out shitfaced.
"Edward, this is outrageous!" Celestia chastised the doctor.
"Alright, we are stopping by this store, steal some fucking clothes, put them on, and keep them on!"
"Fine." Richtofen jumped out of the tank with an MP40 at hand, and no shoes.
"That was utterly disgusting! AGH!!!"
"Hell yes Takeo. Hell yes." Dempsey said as he brought out his M16.
Several minute passed, before they heard some German troops, and then gunfire.
"AHAHAHAHA, Zis is much, MUCH better zen ze undead!"
"EEEEEP!!!" Fluttershy fainted at that phrase and Richtofen hopped in, now in some kind of prototype spacesuit.
"What the hell is that?"
"Just drive American!"
"Quick question." Takeo asked.
"What is it?" Rainbow asked.
"Where are we going?"
"Russia." Richtofen replied.
"The motherland." Nikolai got up quickly. "Quickly comrades, eastward to Moscow!"
"Nein, ve must find somezing zere."
"But... vodka distillery..."
"Ve vill find one soon enough."
"YAAAAAAY!!!" Nikolai yelled.
"That our Nikolai." Applejack said.
"Yes, OUR Nikolai."
And so, our heroes traveled across the East German border, as well as various Soviet Bloc states, all to get one step closer to their goal.
Freedom.
Hey, writer, you better have something big in store for us!
I do Dempsey.
Right, Black Ops I isn't gonna write itself.
It already did.
Whatever, let's end this chapter, and get back to Six, I wanna see if I'm awesome.
Shortly after their stint in East Berlin, the twelve zombie survivors have decided to get out of their tank, which had run out of gas, and began to move along the countryside by foot/hoof.
"Ugh, so much fucking walking." Nikolai complained.
"Be grateful that there are no zombies, you drunken wretch." Takeo retorted.
"Yes, I don't think fighting these things would be good for my complexion." Rarity added.
"What complexion? We've been fighting for... what, three days already, we all know that we look like shit, all of us." Dempsey retorted.
Rarity grimaced, knowing that it was true. Her mane had lost it's lustrous shine, it's magnificent curls, was unkempt. Her hooves had lost their luster and was now gathering dirt, grime and blood. Her coat had become off-white, and the stench, for a lack of personal hygiene had, for a lack of a better term, gone to massive heights.
"That wasn't very nice, Tank." Applejack pointed out.
"Hey, it's the fucking truth, and truth can hurt sometimes."
Applejack sighed, knowing all to well what that meant.
"Yeah, Ah suppose."
"Ja, ja... it's getting dark, ve set up camp here for ze night." Richtofen ordered the group.
In mere minutes, the group had managed to set up a campfire, and were now sitting down for the night.
"So, as ve just been zrough, zere indeed ozzer humans in zis vorld, and many of zem are villing to kill us." Richtofen said plainly.
"To be fair, Edward, we did provoke them." Celestia reminded the German.
"Vell, it vas Dempshey's idea."
Celestia grimaced at this, knowing all too well that she happened to become quick friends with the soldier.
"And it worked, didn't it?" Dempsey retorted.
"At least we don't have to worry about any mean zombies, right guys?" Pinkie said, trying to be optimistic.
"Indeed, we sharr enjoy this respite from fighting, however brief it may be." Takeo said.
"Tak, buddy, you need to relax, take a load off." Dempsey told the Japanese warrior.
"I agree, you have worked so hard to protect us from those wretched zombie, and their filthy hands." Rarity said, digging at the ground a bit as she used her spell to find gems to take the edge off.
"Da, I shall relax with drink." Nikolai drank a gulp of vodka, then smacked his lips.
"Indeed, this world is unlike any we've ever seen." Luna said.
"Yes, the constant violence is unlike any world I could've thought. I hope my little ponies are alright."
"Why is that?" Dempsey asked.
"You see, in our world, Celestia and Luna perform very important actions, controling the sun, and the moon, respectively." Twilight said, letting the egghead in her come out.
All the humans jumped at this news.
"Ohh... controrring the heavens? You have gained much honor in my eyes, Cerestia." Takeo said as he bowed towards Celestia.
Luna scrunched her face and turned away, not liking being ignored by this... heathen.
"Thank you Takeo, but you should praise my sister as well, she is just as important to the world as myself."
"..." Takeo remained silent, then bowed at Luna.
Applejack could tell that this wasn't a sincere motion, but let it be.
"Oh, come on! Are you even gonna try?" Rainbow Dash interjected.
"What concern is it of yours, brash one?"
"I'm saying that you're just sucking up to the princess even more than Twilight."
"HEY!"
"Hey-ey, that is not good thing to say, suka! All comrades must work together to build up true socialist nation. Luna has managed to impress me, and so has Applejack. You are *Urp*... you are just jealous." Nikolai called out at Rainbow. Takeo was surprised at Nikolai actually defending him, and merely took it with a grain of salt.
The group went quiet. No one spoke or moved a muscle.
"Vell, let's just rest, it has been a long time since ve rested." Richtofen said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Richtofen is right, we must rest." Twilight said in agreement.
"Yeah, some sleep would be nice." Dempsey set his back carefully on the ground.
"Okay, nighty night." Nikolai plopped over, falling asleep instantly.
"Might as well." Luna said.
Soon everybody/everypony was fast asleep.
-Several hours later-
"EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"
Fluttershy's scream alerted the group, and then noticed why...
"Zombie monkeys!" Nikolai screamed as he tried to crawl away from the beasts.
"NOOOOOOO!!!" Fluttershy tried to hold down her tears, but couldn't.
"Ah shit, as if human zombies weren't enough!" Dempsey said as he took his M16 and fired at the undead creatures.
Takeo gritted his teeth and took out his AK-74u and fired at the zombies.
Richtofen took his SPAS-12 and blasted each creature with blasts of buckshot.
"Filthy creatures!"
"Well, ain't this great?" Rainbow complained as she hovered over the ground, holding Pinkie Pie.
"Quickly, we must move!" Richtofen ordered the group. The twelve survivors began to run towards whatever direction they began running, only to find a strange device.
"What is this?" Luna asked.
"I don't know, maybe I can vork vith it. Everyone on, now!" Richtofen began to fiddle with the device.
"Hurry, my ammo count is low!" Nikolai yelled out, forced to use his M1911.
"Same here, Doc!" Dempsey switched to his M1911 too.
"I am out!" Takeo took out his M1911, ready to fire.
Richtofen then pressed a button.
Guardrails rose up and then the device began to float up.
"Oh, are we flying? W-we are flying!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Nikolai screamed like a little girl.
Richtofen, not used to the sudden movement, dropped his shotgun.
"Noooo... I liked zat."
"What manner of magic is this?" Luna asked.
"I do not know, but you have to admit, this is actuarry pretty fun!" Takeo said in an uncharacteristic amount of glee.
"Speak for yourself... OHHH!!!" Nikolai began to vomit over the railing.
"Where are we going?" Twilight asked in panic.
"I zink ve're going over zere." Richtofen said, pointing at what appears to be a rocket launching facility.
"Whoa, it's some huge rocket or something! Where are we?" Dempsey exclaimed.
"I don't know, I don't know." Richtofen said quietly.
The survivors were now at an abandoned Soviet launching facility, and Samantha was ready to play her game once more.
"Hmm, no power, AGAIN!!!" Richtofen was starting to see a pattern.
"And there is no color. Good thing vodka has no color." Nikolai replied as he took a swig of vodka.
"Great, what now?" Rarity looked upon the others.
"Standard procedure, we turn on the power." Twilight said.
"PLEASE, HELP ME. SHE'S COMING. THE MECHANISM MUST BE REPAIRED."
"What was that?" Celestia asked.
"I do not know." Richtofen answered honestly. He hated the unknown, it always had a chance to derail his plans. He was no longer annoyed at the ponies, they were content with taking random orders and following him around for whatever reason he needed them for.
"Wait, who's she?" Rarity asked.
"A GIRL, SHE'S ANGRY. SHE WANTS VENGENCE. NO, GO AWAY!"
And then the zombies came.
Nikolai scowled.
"They invade the motherland? THEY WILL SUFFER!!!" Nikolai took out his knife and stabbed one zombie in the eye. The surprise on most of the other's faces showed that even a bumbling drunkard like Nikolai was a dangerous killer.
"Now I feel bad for his wives." Pinkie looked on, disgusted with the Russian's brutality.
"We need to move, now!" Celestia spoke as she opened the upstairs doorway.
The group sped along the ruined area, taking in the awful sight.
"What the hell is this place? I didn't think the Reds could do something like this." Dempsey asked with a hint of worry, something Rainbow Dash noticed.
"I think that that rocket is a good enough clue." Takeo said as he looked towards the harness for the rocket.
"Heh, you jealous?" Nikolai teased Takeo.
"No, I think you are overcompensating actuarry."
"What, no! Little Nikolai is big!" Nikolai held his bottle near his crotch and did a wiggling motion.
"Oh, do not be obtuse Nikorai. Do not ret the rumors foor you though, I have a biiiiiig dick." Takeo smugly replied.
"Why are you two talking about dicks?" Dempsey having a tint of green on his face.
"I do not know, but please continue." Richtofen goaded.
"Wait, what is that?" Applejack pointed towards an elevated area of the station.
"I don't know. RACE YA!" Rainbow Dash sped towards the area, with the rest of the group going a leisurely pace.
They soon found a device in the center of the floor, and to the side, something new.
"PhD Flopper?" Fluttershy tapped the machine, hearing several bottles clank.
"Hmm, I wonder what that does." Luna tapped a hoof to her chin.
"Vell, ve von't know unless ve turn ze power on, as usual. Same here vith zis machine." Richtofen said as he pushed a button, but nothing happened.
"Like I said, Standard procedure." Twilight looked at the building near-by.
"The box, that's the light." Applejack said, looking at the grey light.
"Let's go then." Dempsey walked forward, opening the gate, and entered the building. The group shot some zombies that crawled and shambled within.
"GRAAAAA!!!"
Celestia scowled and kicked the zombie down, right before walking up to it and stomping on its head, crushing it, and killing it.
It was at this point that all the mares knew that they were starting losing grasp of morality they had. Fluttershy herself trembled at the thought, only to be cooled down by a reassuring hug by Takeo.
"What demons fight you, I will help when I can, Little Butterfly."
Fluttershy blushed at Takeo's nickname.
"Oh, just fuck the pony already and get it over with." Nikolai spat out, garnering a slap on the stomach by Pinkie Pie.
"Not gute, Nikolai, not gute at all." Richtofen said in a tone that was disappointment.
"Alright, fine, I am sorry, geeze." Nikolai took a drink of vodka, but Takeo still found his hatred of the Russian to be strong.
"Such a pig." Takeo looked at Fluttershy, who was blushing extremely brightly.
"Dear Faust, we're dealing with idiots." Rainbow Dash covered her face with her wing.
Richtofen opened the door upstairs, and low and behold.
"Oh gute." Richtofen turned on the power, and brought back the color. Everyone was blinded briefly.
"Power online. Preparing rocket for launch!"
At that moment, the rocket from before was beginning to set itself up.
"Oh wow... Hey, the box!" Rainbow pointed at the box. Nikolai was first.
"Vodka and falafel, go great... together..." Nikolai sang drunkenly as he grabbed an FAL.
Richtofen was next, and grabbed a Spectre.
"Ohh, zis looks nice."
Takeo opened the box, and found a strange device.
"What is this?" Takeo said as he handled a yellow and gunmetal device.
"I do not know." Richtofen scowled.
"Okay, let me go." Dempsey soon got a Ray Gun. All he did was smile as he turned it on. Takeo stole Nikolai's turn and got a Thundergun. Richtofen soon got another Ray Gun, and Nikolai got...
"Matryoshka! I used to play with these things as a kid!" Nikolai said with an obvious childlike glee.
"Toys, huh." Pinkie wasn't impressed. Dempsey went for another turn.
A Teddy Bear.
"Fuck you."
"SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!"
"Everyone, postitions now!" Luna ordered out.
Gunshots rang out in this abandoned Soviet Cosmodrone.
And then one of the phones rang.
'To those who can hear me, send help to the United States of America... it's an emergency! Stay back, rotface!' *BANG BANG* 'GRAAAH!!!'
Pinkie Pie literally hopped all over the place, trying to avoid the undead at every turn.
"RAGH, I'M DOWN!!!" Dempsey screamed out.
"Hold on Tank!" Pinkie yelled out as she pounced onto the marine, took out his syringe and injected Dempsey with the strange liquid.
"Thanks Pinkie. Nikolai, you should've watched my ass, because this was your fault!"
"Sorry Dempsey, I was saving moon pony. She also told me that moon is not made of cheese, but I do not believe her."
"Vhat a ridiculous idea. Ze moon, made of cheese. It's absurd." Richtofen said as he curbstomped a zombie with his boot repeatedly.
"Fuck you, Richtofen."
"I vouldn't mind really, haha!"
Takeo decided to try out his Gersch Device, and threw the object at a large group of zombies.
A black hole appeared, as the undead were drawn in, and killed by the light eating object.
"HAH! It's... beautiful!" Richtofen could've cried, but he didn't.
"My word, the power behind this weapon!" Takeo looked at the remaining two Gersch Devices he had, and kept a stoic look.
My device, use it to bring the generator to the Casimir Mechanism. HURRY!!!
"How do we activate this mechanism?" Rarity asked Gersch.
...
"He ain't speaking. He expects us to figure every fucking thing ourselves." Dempsey said with a sour look on his face.
"Perhaps that generator by that PhD Flopper thingy might have something to do with it." Nikolai said with surprising clarity, making almost everyone look at him with shock.
"What?" Nikolai took a drink as he saw the stares at him.
"Nikolai, did you actually say something smart for once?" Twilight asked incredulously.
"What, can't Nikolai do something smart for once?"
"Imma go over there, smash my head against the wall for a few minutes to see if I'm not dreaming, then scream loudly if I'm not." Rainbow Dash said as she trotted calmly to the wall.
"Regardless, Nikolai actually might have a point. Takeo, can you use your device to get that... thing to where it needs to be?" Celestia asked.
"Yes, of course."
"YAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"
"Wow, she is scared." Nikolai said.
Takeo ignored the Russian as he threw the black hole device at the generator. A black hole sucked the equipment in, and a loud beep called out.
"You've done it! Now, it needs as much power as possible. Hurry, she's getting nearer!"
"How do we use this thingy get as much power as possible?" Applejack asked.
"Hmm, I suppose ve should check ze gate near ze spinning zing." Richtofen guessed. "Dempshey, go open ze gate."
"Why me?"
"Because you're richer."
"..." Dempsey shook his head, and soon the group opened the gates leading up to a junkyard of some sort.
"Well this is a... is that a lander dock?" Dempsey pointed at the docking bay for the lunar lander.
"It is. UGH!!!" Nikolai activated the device, letting the lunar lander fly towards the group.
"You don't like flying, don't you?" Luna remarked.
"No. Is why I didn't join air force."
"Humans have an air force?" Twilight asked.
"Ja! It started vith ze bi-plane!"
Another loud beep rang out.
Node One, activated!
"Made in America." Dempsey spoke up.
"Shut up, American!"
"No, you shut up!"
"Both of you, imbeciles! Shut up!" Takeo screamed, right before clonking the two's heads together, earning an unsure look from Fluttershy.
"What the hell, Tak?"
"Quiet, you stupid American. Rook!"
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
"Eh, Takeo has good point. Onto lunar lander thingy!" Nikolai got on top of the lander, with the others quickly following suit. The lander took off.
"Oh, I feel sick." Nikolai gagged.
"Wait, what was the point of going there?" Rarity asked.
"There was a thing of some kind in the corner. I pushed one button, and poof, something about a Node." Takeo explained as the Lander landed in the centrifuge room.
"Hey, is that a rocket?" Dempsey pointed at the icon near them.
"Und ze green... Ja, zis must be ze fuel level! Ve must refuel ze rocket!" Richtofen proclaimed.
"Uh, why?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Uh, to fire it into ze sky, duh!"
"It's a third of the way there! There must be two more!" Luna guessed.
"Because most good things come in threes, like my third wife... she was good with her three-"
"Nikolai, no more innuendos, or I swear, I'll commit murder!" Rarity screeched.
"I'rr help dispose of the body." Takeo added.
"Wow, you guys are dicks." Nikolai looked with disapproval.
"Where the hell's the Juggernog?" Dempsey asked as the group went to where the power switch was.
"Let's look around. Ve can find it vhile ve search for ze ozzer landing ports."
"Sounds like a plan. Split into two groups?" Twilight asked.
"I call Takeo's group!" Dempsey raised his hand.
"Traitor!" Nikolai yelled.
"Oh, don't worry Nikolai, I can be wonderful company." Richtofen said in a sultry voice.
"...I need adult."
"I am an adult."
"Guys, let's just go and find the landing ports and the Juggernog!" Celestia ordered around.
"... Gud plan." Richtofen reluctantly agreed as the groups split up at where the box was, one group going down one staircase, and the other down the other, after Takeo opened it with his points.
Richtofen whistled as he casually opened the door, leading Twilight, Pinkie, Nikolai, Luna and Applejack to another Lunar Lander.
"Alright, what can we- Oh shit, sickle!" Nikolai touched the chalk drawing of the sickle and it brought forth the farming instrument.
"Now all I need is hammer."
"Darn tootin'!" Applejack smirked.
"Boop! Lander's coming!" Pinkie shouted.
RAAAAAAAAAAGH!
"Oh, SHUT UP!" Nikolai stabbed the zombie with the sickle, killing it.
"And do not get up, suka!" Nikolai looked over to the lander. "Let us go. I would rather we finished quickly."
BRRRRRRRRRRRR
"Sounds. Doesn't sound good."
A space capsule landed next to them. A zombified monkey crawled out, a monkey that Nikolai promptly shot.
"Fuck you, monkey."
"Nikolai, I found a button. Let's push it." Richtofen pushed it.
"Error, simultaneous pressing required."
You'll need to find the four buttons to activate the second node. There should be a button by Speed Cola, PhD Flopper, Juggernog and Stamin-up. You can only do this when the cosmo monkeys are here.
"How does that make sense?" Twilight yelled.
"Nikolai shall go to Juggernog! Where is Juggernog?"
The group had an awkward silence.
"I sharr handle Stamin-up." Takeo said, hanging out by the button.
"It's the chewy prune drink for me then. Gotcha." Dempsey gave an affirmative nod to Rainbow and Celestia, before going off.
"Explain why we are doing this." Rarity said with weariness.
"This man requires our assistance. Perhaps if we do it, we sharr free him from his prison, and we can move on." Takeo stated as the zombie monkey's went over to the passed out Fluttershy. Takeo shot the monkey, knowing what this Element 115 would do to any creature.
Press the buttons, now.
The four did so.
Node two, activated.
The rocket needs to launch.
"Looks like we have one more thing to do."
Nikolai stomped on two more Zombie Monkey heads.
"HAHA!!! Let it be known, monkey, that Nikolai hates you, and your beady little eyes!"
Rocket ready to launch.
"Wha... When did that happen? Did Richtofen do it for me?"
"Don't know. Let's go find out how to launch the rocket." Luna said, rushing to the roof. Nikolai gave a shrug as Applejack followed Luna.
He soon found himself finding Takeo getting a Ray Gun from the box, and the other having rearmed themselves with a new weapon. Nikolai cursed that stripper, whoever she was silently.
"Okay. Push zis button, und the rocket flies." Richtofen said.
"Really? Push it, Doctor! Nikolai wants to see this!"
"Well, okay zen." Richtofen pushed the button. A countdown began as the rocket began to launch.
Smoke filled the area below as the piece of Soviet engineering achieved launch.
"Ah, nothing could ruin this day!"
"Is that so?" Takeo said.
"Da. Unless rocket blow up."
"Good." Takeo fired a shot at the rocket, causing it to explode.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! TAKEO, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!"
Takeo rolled his eyes, before noticing the glares he was receiving from the others.
"Tak, not cool man." Dempsey said as he folded his arms.
"I may not like Nikolai, but that was just plain mean, meany-pants!" Pinkie added.
"Takeo, darling, there are lines we do not cross." Rarity scolded Takeo.
Takeo took a deep inhale, before sighing.
"Ugh. Fine. I am sorry, Nikorai."
"...I will accept apology if you find me vodka."
"When we find it, sure." Takeo felt the bitterness of the words.
"Let's go find out what's below the rocket." Celestia said as the group walked downstairs. After a brief trip, they found the Pack-A-Punch Machine.
"Well, looks like we got 'em." Dempsey smiled as the four humans went to the machine. The mares sat in the center of the area that rocket just launched from.
"Well, this is certainly unique." Twilight remarked.
"Rockets to space. What will humans think of next." Luna added.
"I dunno." Rainbow shrugged. "But I guess they're going to try and top this eventually."
"Yeah. Who knows. Maybe they will." Twilight nodded.
KABOOM!
"Did somepony pick up one of those bombs?" "Did someone pick up nuke?"
Pinkie and Nikolai looked at each other, wondering the same thing.
Node 3, activated.
Yes, YES! Almost there! Hurry! She's coming! LUNA!!!
"Huh? Why are you speaking to me?" Luna asked.
"Ugh, we've got shit to do, and now something cryptic? Goddamn you, Gersch." Dempsey muttered.
"Oh well, let's figure out what needs to be done." Nikolai said. "What is with glowing things in sky?"
Luna looked up. "Perhaps some pick-ups. I'm going to risk it." Luna took flight.
"Sister! Do you wish to get infected?"
"I'll try not to die, Celestia." Luna flew up, and found that they were letters. Feeling slightly ill from the residual 115 in the air, she flew as fast as she could.
She soon found an L, and put together the pieces.
Node 4, activated.
"My God, she actually did it." Dempsey noted.
"Ha! Night skies rule!" Nikolai shouted.
Luna soon landed near the others. Though shaky, she was fine.
"Luna, zat vas stupid, und dangerous, but I admire your guts. Now, let's figure out vhat zis Gersch needs now." Richtofen said, ready to move on to the pod.
After the group reached it, they noticed an orb near the ground.
"Celestia, Luna, Twilight und Rarity, perhaps your magic could be of use here."
"Well, I suppose we can try." Celestia said. The four took a deep breath, and imbued the orb with as much magic as they could. The energies swirled around, and the orb glowed brighter.
Eventually, the magic orb burst in a flash, and flew into the air.
FREEDOM!!! I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH!!! Come to think of it... eight of you are... ponies?
"It's a long story." Applejack noted.
...Err, my thanks anyway. Farewell.
"Well, that happened. What now?"
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!
The yell that came from Samantha caused the others to cover their ears. The residual energies that stayed with them began to swirl around them.
"EDWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD!!!"
"SHUT UP, SAMANTHA!!! SHUT! UP!"
The energies mixed with the magic, and the twelve were gone.
"AGH! Damn it! Where are we?" Dempsey shouted.
"I do not feel so good." Takeo threw up.
"Oh... horseapples. It's dark here." Applejack muttered.
