A Dialogue with Celestia

by Timefly

First published

Cadence is maturing fast, and it falls upon Celestia to have the 'talk' with her...

Cadence is maturing fast, and it falls upon Celestia to have 'the talk' with her, the talk that all young alicorns must eventually hear.


Cover Art: Princess Celestia by Secret Pony

Mother Knows Best

View Online

A Dialogue With Celestia



“Hello there, Cadence, it’s nice to see you again. Tea?

There you are. And how are you?

That’s good to hear. How’s Shining Armor?

Oh, that’s a shame. I’m sure he’ll be fine though.

Anyway, I thought it was about time that we sat down and had a talk. Now, Cadence, as an alicorn you’re still very young, but I’ve spoken with Luna and she and I both agree that you have a measure of wisdom beyond your years, so I’d like to tell you about what it is an Alicorn is born to do.

Alicorns are born to be mothers, Cadence, although not in the normal sense of the word. Alicorns are born to be mothers of nations. Now, at this point you may be curious about Luna. Luna is not typical of an alicorn, instead she’s given up her maternal instincts for art. Of course, she still is labelled as a ruler of this country, but that’s really just a remnant of the whole ‘Nightmare Moon’ fiasco. Luna gets a bit touchy when no-one appreciates her art—

Yes, of course I mean the night sky. Anyway, this highlights something interesting. The night sky has always been an intricate piece of art and, ultimately, an expression of Luna herself. The day sky is in fact an expression of myself, or rather how I project myself.

The clear endless blue with the single burning sun. The sun giving life and sustenance to the earth and warmth to all creatures, but also the sun is a sign of dominance; an endless source of power, an immutable cycle of rising and setting, a clear sign of my will.

My dear, you seem at a loss for words. I guess you never imagined I had a poetic side.

Where were we? Ah yes. There will come a time, Cadence, when you will have a longing; an inescapable desire to rule. You will feel your power and you will be unhappy under the servitude of your current kingdom–oh, by the way, at that time I would advise against teenage rebellion as alicorns do not take lightly to someone else messing around with their kingdom–but, as I said there will come such a time. When the longing arrives, you’ve reached adulthood. You may for a while experience some strange sensations and phenomenons, but let me tell you this, they’re all telling you one thing; “It’s time to leave home, and start your own kingdom.”

I must say Cadence you’re taking this all very well. When giving most alicorn fillies the talk, they usually blush and get all embarrassed, but you... Well, this is just a testament to your maturity. I will admit, I do find your look of bewilderment a little strange.

Continuing with our talk. When you first go to start a kingdom you’ll need subjects. Don’t be embarrassed, just ask and I’ll facilitate your request. It should be apparent that I won’t give you an entire city’s worth, but a few thousand should get you started.

What do you mean, “What if the ponies don’t want to come?” Of course they’ll want to come. You just stick up some posters on the walls asking for adventurers to start a colony and everything sails smoothly from there. You will have to live under the title of colony at first, but it shall be in name only. After a while, you can make a show of vouching for independence. I’d rather you didn’t go for a large ‘independence’ event as those look terribly bad on the kingdom you were brought up in, and I wouldn’t be best pleased.

When you start your kingdom, you’ll want to start small. You need to be ready to abort if anything goes wrong. Preferably, it would be nice if everypony could live, but if ponies get exposed to too many horrible things they tend to become mentally scarred and a bad cycle begins.

My dear, by aborting I mean killing everypony.

I don’t see why you’re so horrified, ruling is a nasty business. Now please, sit down and let me continue.

Good, thankyou. Let’s continue, shall we. Always remember the goal of a kingdom, to make those who you rule happy. As a mother, you must love your child, you must only want what’s best for them. The kingdom is not there to serve you. I will admit that there are benefits to ruling, for example the palace you see around you, but pushing your subjects into slavery and forcing them to build you pyramids is not what good alicorns do.

Most of the things you’ll need to know about ruling come from experience but I can give you an idea of some of the basics.

Bedtimes are a good idea for when the kingdom is young. Don’t just let your subjects stay up all night drinking and having orgies, it’s not conducive to hard work. Don’t deprive them of festivities though, or else you’ll just have miserable ponies. Try and enact some sort of calendar of celebrations, it gives ponies something to look forward to. What else, let me see... Oh, yes. Make sure you establish firm rules. The idea of letting ponies do whatever they want and believing in their inherent goodness is a nice idea, but not a realistic one. There’s always a bad few in the bunch who’ll go and ruin the freedom for everyone else by killing others or something of the sort. Law is important, never forget that.

On the issue of law, I suppose we should talk about discipline. Now, prison is good, it protects both your subjects and teaches a lesson. Death penalty is really a matter of conscience, although, there might be certain crimes where death penalty is warranted no matter what your conscience says. You can figure out what those are as you go.

As for spanking a country, well, popular uprisings are a definite no-no. When a kingdom’s still young they’ll be rather arrogant and will like to test their limits. React firmly and swiftly. Imprisonments, making examples and massacres will all be cards in your hand, play them wisely though, you do not want to become a tyrant.

Cadence, are you trembling?

Are you going to give me an answer?

No? Well, I’ll continue. When disciplining, always make sure to have a clear head, never react in anger or vengeance or with a hot head. Your kingdom is not yours to abuse. Simply lay down the law and respond to infractions appropriately. There’ll be times in a young kingdom when it may hurt you, it may even say “It hates you.” As long as you’re not abusive or a tyrant, these are only things that are said out of hurt. the kingdom won’t really mean it. Try not to respond in a similar manner, or else what you say eventually becomes truth.

I think that covers most of the basics.

Now, I want you to listen up, this is going to be the most important part of all.

Sometimes you need to let your kingdom be hurt; not by your hand, but by circumstance. You need to let your kingdom learn how to pick itself up. Your subjects can become overly dependent on you. I’m not going to give you a lecture on why it’s a bad thing, that’s for you to figure out, but trust me on this. Don’t baby your kingdom forever. There’ll come a time when your kingdom is ready, ready to run itself. Your kingdom becomes all grown up and you know that to rule it for any longer would be detrimental to its growth. All chicks have got to leave the nest eventually.

Equestria’s almost ready, the country can fend for itself now. My successors are already lined up. I wonder if you can guess who they might be? Soon, I’ll hand over the reigns, and let the country rule itself.

It’s really a special moment when your kingdom begins to govern itself. I always cry when it’s time. Look, there’s tears coming to my eyes even now... After all the hard work and effort, it’s so worth it. There’s no greater feeling in the entire world.

“What will I do next?” Well, probably take a break, visit the Baahamas and make friends with the locals–sheep do make for brilliant conga lines–then, when I’m ready, start again. A new land, a new flag, and a new start; maternal extinct. I’ll get a chance to do everything I should have done with Equestria. the laws will be fairer, the people happier, and maybe this time we can avoid apocalyptic-level disasters.

And then, someday in the future, I’ll lose the instinct. I’ll say farewell to my last kingdom and then, well, retirement I suppose. I don’t suppose I’ll live much longer than that, but I’ll enjoy my remaining time. I’ll pop in and visit from time to time, you and Equestria. And then one day, it’ll end. And that’s just the way the story goes.

Anyway, Cadence. That’s the talk. If you have any questions... well good, that shows you’re thinking.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a particularly important meeting to be at.”


The brilliance of the moon was cast over the mountains and the stars twinkled in the void of space. Luna sat, soaking in the night’s chill. Her breath condensed into thin wisps, curling through the air.

There was a small flash beside her.

“So?” Luna inclined her head toward Celestia.

“We had the talk.”

“How did she react?”

“She was very mature about it all.”

“I told you she would be.”

They sat for some time, enjoying the silence of the night. At such a high altitude the sky was crystal clear; stars sprinkled the sky like glitter on black silk.

“Luna...”

“Yes?” Luna looked towards Celestia, her eyebrow raised slightly.

“Do you ever wonder if the talk–that which was passed down to us–is wrong?”

Luna’s eyebrow raised slightly higher.

“In what manner?”

“Well, surely there’s a better way— Cadence looked so horrified.”

“Oh.”

“The methods we were taught to control kingdoms. Some of them seem so... barbaric.”

Luna was quiet again. She looked up at her masterpiece.

“Celestia, do you have questions?”

“Many.”

“Good, that shows you’re thinking.”