Oh, just a minor extra credit assignment....
The Young Twilight Sparkle sat on her haunches, staring in frustration at the a blank piece of parchment on her private desk in her room. The* Earlier that day her teacher, one Princess Celestia, had given her a monthly review on Twilight's grades. Of course, she received an 'A+', but this time her review offered something a little different as well. Something that was now giving her a colossal headache.
"Twilight, as usual your grade is superb." Twilight nodded with a proud smile. Would she have settled for anything less? "and since you have gone an entire two years with a grade so high and perfect, I'm going to offer you an extra little challenge." Twilight tilted her head to one side inquisitively, looking heart-attack-inducingly adorable in the process. "If you succeed, I will allow you to choose what your next lesson in magic will be." Twilight's face first took on a look of shock, then eagerness. A chance to choose what to learn next? Oh, there were so many choices, so many amazing things not taught in public schools! When could she start?!
"When can I start?!" She nearly shouted and hopped eagerly with an eager hop in the air.
"Take it easy, Twilight." Celestia chided, suppressing a laugh. Twilight's enthusiasm was delightful, and not at all unexpected. "I'm getting to it. Since you read as many books as you do I figured that I would test your grammar skills' limits." Eager golden stars appeared on Twilight's eyes in place of irises. This was a test that she just knewshe could pass without any studying necessary. She had, after all, read nearly a quarter of the libra all books in the cas % this castle, and by extension this city. Most of them were far above her age range which gave her a clear advantage.
"I can do it!" Celestia raised an eyebrow.
"Are you sure? My own teacher gave me this test when I was younger. Do you know what happened?"
"You succeeded and your teacher and parents were proud?" How could she have failed? She was Princess Celestia! Celestia shook her head.
"I failed." Twilight's jaw dropped and her eyes bulged outward. "To be fair though, my family couldn't do it either." Celestia smiled fondly and gazed above Twilight's head a bit, her eyes distant as she gazed into the a past event. "My father thought he was having a joke played on him and my mother couldn't read. Luna-" Celestia cleared her throat as fond thoughts darted to more unpleasant ones. "Anyway, the this challenge is rather simple, but that sadly doesn't make it easy." Twilight closed her mouth but couldn't remove her shocked expression. Celestia failed at something?
She failed at this? How do I stand a chance, then? Still...to choose my own lesson... "I'm still going to try it." Her voice was not as confident as it had been, but she at least still wanted to give it a go.
"Good. You are to write a piece of literature that does not use one specific word a single time."
"Which word, Princess Celestia?"
"Tee. Aych. Ee."
"Th-" Celestia covered Twilight's mouth with a hoof with a smirk and nodded.
"Not a single time. Do you think you can do that?" Twilight considered this as Celestia removed her hoof. She had never, not once seen a book or spoken to a pony that had not used the such a common word at least once. Usually it would come up at least twice in a five minute conversation. It was no small task that had been placed before her. Should she succeed at this it would mean not only that she had succeeded in something that even Princess Celestia had failed at, but she would likely also be the firs a first in doing it ever! This was a new frontier in the literary exploration! This could be something that writers of books, poetry, newspapers, essays, and even fan-fiction stories would remember for all time! This was not mere extra credit, no! This was her duty! A responsibility to ALL writing-ponies everywhere!
Celestia watched her little purple student. It was taking every ounce of self-control to hold back her giggles as Twilight's face changed from discouraged to some unknown realization of wonder, to serious, to determined. No doubt, if she knew her student well (and she did) Twilight was blowing this way out of proportion and driving it to heights beyond over-dramatic. She really wished she had a video camera just then.
Twilight once more raised her quill and dipped it into its ink well to replace theher ink that had dried on it earlier. Tapping it on its lip Twilight raised her quill and held it ready. And waited. And waited some more. A single drop of ink that had collected upon its tip dripped from her quill, splattering below. Not counting it as first, nor as second, nor as third. After another five minutes, Twilight made a sound of disgust, crumpled the her third piece of parchment and tossed it away.
"This is crazy!" She shouted at the her empty room, eyes squeezed shut. "How hard is it to write a few short lines that don't use the that word a single time?!" The ^ It was a rhetorical question given that she'd been at it for the last half a day.
Twilight slumped to the floor, a feeling of defeat creeping over her. She sighed again, eyes drooping slowly closed. "I- I...failed." She started to cry.