Love Is Like A Cure

by chillbook1

First published

A collection of shorts detailing the lives of Rarity and Twilight after a freak disease brought the two together.

Rarity always had feelings for Twilight, but never had the opportunity or courage to do anything about them. When Twilight falls ill, and Rarity is the one to care for her, the two draw closer, and their relationship shifts from friendly to romantic.

A collection of an undetermined number of shorts involving Rarity and Twilight after she's recovered. Cover art is Twilight x Rarity by TheFabledRarity.

Telling The Girls

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Rarity shouldn’t have felt nervous stepping into Twilight’s castle, but she did. She couldn’t help but look over her shoulder, afraid of being seen. The idea was preposterous, of course, considering that it wasn’t a crime for her to visit her good friend Princess Twilight. In fact, it made perfect sense for Rarity to be there, considering what had transpired in the last two months.

As far as the citizens of Ponyville knew, their beloved and benevolent Princess Twilight Sparkle had fallen ill, dangerously, violently ill, and her chances of recovery were quite low. To prevent the infection from spreading, Twilight erected a massive quarantine bubble to entrap herself. Unfortunately, that also meant that her visiting friend, Rarity, was also trapped with her.
Through an amazing twist of fate, Rarity never contracted the illness that nearly claimed Twilight’s life. While enclosed in the quarantine, Rarity helped her in every way she could. She fed her, read to her, medicated her (using the medication supplied through the bubble by Princess Celestia), and generally made the princess of friendship feel much better. Twilight soon recovered, there was a small celebration, and they all went about their normal lives.

In reality, all of that did happen, except for things returning to normal. That was the one time that Twilight ever lied to the citizens of Ponyville, even if it wasn’t technically a lie. She didn’t actually say anything, and her people just assumed that, once Twilight was back to full health, that would be the end of it. Nobody really noticed how much more frequently Rarity paid the princess a visit.

Rarity entered the castle, closing the doors behind her. She walked down the crystal halls, admiring the eloquent twinkle and shine of the diamond walls. She couldn’t imagine Twilight’s distaste for the beautiful castle. Ever since she was a child, Rarity dreamed of living in a wondrous, spectacular castle like this. The halls gave way to a large, circular throne room, where the princess of the castle was seated in her throne. Her hands were filled with a book, while her horn was hovering around quills and parchment, writing out notes and letters. Twilight never looked up from whatever it was she was reading, but a smile spread onto her face.

“Hello, Rarity,” said Twilight. “How are you?”

“Absolutely wonderful, darling,” said Rarity, matching Twilight’s smile. “I’m still feeling normal, though I do agree that we should double-check.” Twilight marked her page and closed the book, but didn’t cease floating around the letters-in-progress.

“Of course,” said Twilight. She tilted her horn slightly in Rarity’s direction and bathed her in a scanning wave of violet light. “Hm… Seems normal. The virus hasn’t mutated or manifested in any way.”

“That’s good news, is it not?” asked Rarity. “Is there anyone else here?”

“Nope. The girls are all doing their own things, and Spike went out on a grocery run for me,” said Twilight. Her panning beam swept up and down Rarity one last time before dissipating in a blinking flash. Rarity took a few steps towards Twilight, wrapping her arms around her.

“Then may we drop this charade?” asked Rarity. Twilight leaned forward and kissed Rarity for a moment before pulling away.

“I suppose we can,” said Twilight with a smirk. “So, what’s the schedule for today, Rares?”

“Well, I cannot stay for long,” said Rarity. “The orders at the Boutique are piling up, and Sweetie Belle decided that she could host a Crusader’s sleep-over. On a school night! That girl, I promise you, she is going to be the death of me!” Twilight giggled, which brought a puzzled look onto Rarity’s face.

“Sorry,” apologized Twilight. “It’s just… I think it’s cute how flustered you get over your sister. It reminds me of what I used to put Shining Armor through.”

“There’s no way my little angel caused anyone trouble,” said Rarity. “And if you did, you were nothing compared to my destructive little sister.” She kissed Twilight again, running a hand through her hair.

“Do you think you can trust your ‘destructive little sister’ enough to leave them alone?” asked Twilight. “Maybe come over and spend the night?” Rarity blushed slightly.

“Oh? What exactly are you asking?” asked Rarity. “You don’t mean…” Twilight went wide-eyed, and put on an embarrassed sort of grin. It was one of the expressions that only Twilight could make, with her eyes closed just so and her face visible with awkwardness. It was such a dorky expression, but it made Rarity melt every time she saw it.

“I didn’t mean anything like that!” Twilight amended. “If you don’t mind, I’d rather wait for marriage. No, I just meant… You know, just spend some time together.” Rarity didn’t say anything at first, so Twilight took that to mean that her attempt was a swing and a miss. “I mean, I understand if you can’t make it. Besides, that might bring up some awkward questions, now that I think about it. Forget I even asked.” Rarity said nothing and, with a smile on her face, grasped Twilight’s shoulders gently and kissed her on the forehead (Rarity had to stand on tip-hoof, as she was quite bit shorter than Twilight).

“I’ll try my best to make it, darling,” said Rarity. “I just need to make sure my sister and her friends are asleep before I go.” She was just about to kiss Twilight again when she heard a voice that scared her out of her skin.

“Hiya, guys!” said Pinkie suddenly. Rarity was so startled that she physically jumped a few feet to the left, and Twilight was incapable of speaking, though that was mostly from fear than raw shock.

“Pinkie! How long have you been here?” asked Twilight nervously.

“I dunno,” said Pinkie Pie. She pressed an index finger to her chin. “A few seconds, I guess. Not sure, all I know is that it was my birthday a second ago, and now, boom! I’m here.”

“Pinkie, your birthday was six months ago,” said Rarity.

“I know! Pretty freaky, huh?” said Pinkie. In order to save herself the grey hairs, Rarity decided to leave that storyline alone. “So, you ready to go, Rare-bear?”

“Ready for what?” asked Rarity, ignoring Twilight’s quiet repetition of the nickname “Rare-bear”.

“Did you forget, silly?” asked Pinkie. “You said you wanted me to model a dress for you.” Rarity still looked lost. “Said something about wanting to see how some dress would fit my figure?”

Pinkie wasn’t as thin and toned as someone like Rainbow Dash, but she was far from fat. Sure, she had a bit of a pudge, but it only added to her own unique beauty. Not only that, she had wonderfully attractive curves, a plot that garnered stares from mares and stallion alike, and a chest that even Fluttershy could be envious of. Rarity saw this beauty and was inspired to create something for Pinkie and others like her.

“Awww, thanks, Mr. Narrator!” said Pinkie. “You really know how to flatter a gal, don’t you?” She blinked, and it was as if she just noticed she was still at the castle. “So, are you ready?”

“Um… Yes, of course,” said Rarity. “Oh, wait, one thing. I seem to have misplaced my glasses.”

“Oh, you left them here last week,” said Twilight. “I put them in my drawer for safe keeping. Come on, I just have to unlock the door for you.”

Pinkie Pie nodded in agreement, then inexplicably cartwheeled down the hall. Choosing not to think about it too much, Rarity and Twilight made their way upstairs to Twilight’s bedroom. She produced a key from her pocket, unlocked the door, and the two entered, swinging the door behind them. Neither had to say a word to know what the other thought, but they both said it anyway.

“We have to tell them soon,” they said, locking panicked gazes. If the situation wasn’t so serious, they might’ve laughed at the coincidence.

“Right, so you were thinking the same,” said Twilight. “Rarity, we can’t keep this a secret for much longer. Do you realize how close that was?”

“I do,” sad Rarity. “Any sooner or any later, and Pinkie would have seen me kiss you.” She leaned forward to look at Twilight’s face. “Wipe your lips. My lipstick rubbed off.” Twilight licked her thumb (much to Rarity’s displeasure) and wiped away the faint purple that stained her lips.

“How are we going to do it?” asked Twilight. “They’re going to be so mad that we kept this from them!” Rarity tapped her forehead in thought, considering all of their possible courses.

“Hm… Okay,” said Rarity. “I have a few bottles of chianti at the Boutique. Tonight, we’ll invite the girls over here, have some wine, and come clean.”

“With a toast to the future,” said Twilight, nodding in agreement. “Good plan. We’ll meet here at, say, seven?”

“Can’t be earlier than eight,” said Rarity. “Sweetie Belle…”

“Say no more,” said Twilight. “Eight it is. I’ll let the girls know.” Twilight lit up her horn, opening one of her drawers by magic. Surrounded in a purple glow, Rarity’s glasses rose from the drawer’s depths and landed in her hand.

“Twilight, darling, you do understand what we plan to do, don’t you?” asked Rarity. “There’s no going back at that point. And, Celestia forbid it doesn’t work out… Things may never be the same.”

“Things wouldn’t be the same anyway,” said Twilight, shaking her head. “We’ve got to tell them.” Rarity, of course, knew that, however, the knowledge did nothing to make the situation easier.

“Very well,” sighed Rarity. “I better leave before Pinkie gets restless. See you later, darling.”

“I can’t wait,” said Twilight with a smirk. “Rare-bear.” Rarity rolled her eyes despite the small smile on her face, blew Twilight a kiss, then rushed downstairs to catch up with Pinkie. Meanwhile, Twilight fell onto her bed, trying to wrap her head around how dramatically things had changed, and how drastically different things would be from this point on.


A few hours later

Rarity arrived at the castle with the last two bottles of wine, totalling in five. She truly didn’t know what she ever intended to do with that much wine, but she figured that the bottles would be better off at Twilight’s home than her own, in any scenario.

When Rarity finally made it to the throne room, where all of her friends were waiting for her, she took a seat in her crystal, gem-decalled throne, which had only a single seat between her and Twilight (Rarity had never been more jealous of Applejack in her life). The girls all seemed to be on high-alert, as if expecting a disaster to be in progress. Everyone in the room, Twilight included, looked to the mare with the wine.

And, for nearly five minutes, nobody said anything.

“So… What’s up?” asked Rainbow Dash finally. “You guys plan to tell us why you called us here, or do you want us to start guessing?”

“Guessing?” said Pinkie, as if she just walked into the conversation. “Oh! Oh! Lemme guess! Uh.. You invited us over to tell us that I was right all these years about how you’re supposed to read books!”

“No, Pinkie, you’re still wrong,” said Rarity, shaking her head. “Horribly so, I might add. You read books right-side up and left to right, not upside-down and backwards.”

“Or so you claim…” said Pinkie suspiciously. “Oh! I got it! You called us over to find out who ate all of Aj’s chili! Spoiler alert, it was Fluttershy and Rainbow.”

“Dammit, Pinkie!” said RD. “Who told you?”

“Fluttershy talks in her sleep,” said Pinkie plainly. “And I watch Fluttershy sleep sometimes”

“Ah spent four goddamn hours on that chili,” said Applejack dejectedly. “Tha’ pot was perfect. Ah ain’t never gonna be able to make chili that good again. Ah ain’t even get a bowl...”

“Hm… So it’s not about books, and it’s not about chili…” Pinkie rubbed her chin thoughtfully. Then, realization dawned on her, and she snapped her fingers in excitement. “I know! This is an intervention! We’re here to help Twilight get over her fear of quesadillas!”

“I am not afraid of quesadillas!” shouted Twilight, though a little louder than she intended. “I’m not afraid. I just think that cheese should be for sandwiches and tortillas should be for burritos. There is no reason to combine the two! It’s obscene! It’s disorganized! It’s… It’s just wrong!”

That did a spectacular job at lightening the mood, and the five friends couldn’t stop laughing for several minutes. Eventually, when things calmed down, Twilight and Rarity realized that they had to do something else.

“Well, what I just really wanted was to talk,” said Twilight, skating around the truth in spectacularly precise fashion. “I almost didn’t make it. It’s made me appreciate you guys more, and I think we could all do with a bit more time together, don’t you think?”

All things considered, Twilight made a lot of sense. Judging that her little fib had worked, Twilight fired up her horn and levitated six wine glasses from her kitchen and placed one in the hand of each mare in the room.

“How about some wine?” offered Rarity. She popped the cork and levitated the bottle around, filling each of her friends’ glasses.

“Y’all must be feelin on top of tha world, ain’t ya?” asked Applejack. “‘Specially you, Twilight. One hoof in tha grave, but ya came back kickin’.”

“It must have been hard,” said Fluttershy, taking a tiny sip of wine. “How’d you get through it?”

“Rarity was a lot of help,” said Twilight. “If it weren’t for her, I don’t think I would’ve made it at all. She tricked my mind into thinking that my body was fine, and that was enough to carry me for a while. But, if you don’t mind, I’d rather we talk about the future, rather than the past.” Twilight realized at that second that she slipped into an old habit: steering a conversation in a direction that she had no ready way to continue speaking.

“The future!” said Pinkie. “How far into the future? A week? Twelve years? I wonder what things will be like in twelve years. By that time, most of us will probably be pregnant or about to marry. What about a hundred years? You guys think we’ll be alive in a hundred years? I don’t. I think we’ll all be dead!”

“Let’ play a game!” said Twilight suddenly. The rest of the room looked at her in confusion. “A drinking game! When I lived in Canterlot, Princess Celestia put me in charge of a study group, and there was a game we’d play after our Friday night study session. It’s called ‘Didn’t You Know?’, and I think it’ll be fun.”

“Sure, let’s do it,” said Rainbow, with a gleam in her eye. She didn’t know how to win the game, but she was determined to do just that. “How do you play?”

“It’s sorta like ‘Never Have I Ever’,” said Twilight. “We go around in a circle, and we say a sentence that starts with ‘Didn’t you know that’ and ends with something that you don’t think anyone else knows, and if you knew that already, you take a drink.”

“Cool. Who’s first?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“I’ll start,” said Twilight. “Didn’t you know that I have never gotten blackout drunk?” Everyone but Twilight herself took a drink from their glass.

“Sorry, Twi, but you don’t really come off as the partying type,” said Rainbow Dash. “When you told me that Rarity was bringing wine, I thought you’d have some apple juice or something for yourself.”

“Ah think it’s mah turn,” said Applejack. “Didn’t y’all know that Ah haven’t cried since Ah was eleven?” Rainbow, Pinkie, and Fluttershy all took a sip. Next, it was Rarity’s turn.

“Didn’t you know,” said Rarity. “That, come the Summer Sun Celebration next month, we will have all officially been friends for five years?” Only Twilight and Rainbow Dash drank that round.

“Wait, y’all are tryin to tell me that Rainbow Dash remembered a date?” snickered Applejack. “Ah never pegged ya as th sentimental type, but ya remembered our anniversary? Ain’t that just about tha sweetest thing y’all ever heard?”

“Bite me, Aj,” said Rainbow, sticking out her tongue. “Believe it or not, I actually do care about my friends.”

The game continued in a similar vein, with someone revealing a truth they believe to be secret, the some, all, or none of the others drinking, a few laughs and snide remarks sprinkled in. It was all quite good fun, and, with Rarity refilling their glasses whenever they neared empty, there was always a drink to be had. After several full loops around the group, Rarity had an epiphany: neither she nor Twilight said what they intended to in the first place.

“Rarity?” said Applejack. “It’s on you.” Rarity gripped her glass and stood up, trying to push her fear as far down in her body as possible. She wasn’t sure what she was scared of. Her friends would love her, regardless of anything, and they certainly weren’t the bigots she’d associated with during high school.

“Very well,” said Rarity. “Didn’t you know… That I am… I am a lesbian?”

Everybody in the room took a sip of wine.

“What?! How? I’ve not told any of you!” said Rarity. “This is my second biggest secret, and you all knew?!”

“Well, yes,” said Fluttershy. “You just seem… I don’t know how to say it, but you’re sort of… You seem like…”

“You’re the biggest lipstick lesbo any of us have ever seen,” said Rainbow Dash. “Nothing wrong with that, but it’s pretty obvious.” For some reason, Rarity felt the need to argue her case, and she racked her brain trying to prove how it wasn’t so obvious.

“What about Blueblood, hm?” challenged Rarity. “Or Trenderhoof! Applejack, I almost resorted to petty violence over him, what have you to say about that?”

“Honey, we could tell ya ain’t had no real feelings fer him,” said Applejack. “Ah think ya were more attracted to his status than him.”

“I have one,” said Twilight. She stood up to match Rarity.

“Hey!” exclaimed Pinkie, oblivious to the sudden air of seriousness that fell on the room. “You skipped me!” Twilight ignored her, instead deciding to focus on how to best articulate what she needed to say.

“Didn’t you know,” said Twilight. “That, while I was sick, Rarity and I started to develop or reveal romantic feelings for one another? And that we’ve been dating for the past two months?”

At least two wine glasses crashed against the floor. Twilight and Rarity waited for someone to say something, anything at all, but nobody seemed to want to. After the first awkward minute of stunned silence, Twilight and Rarity returned to their seats.

“So…” said Twilight sheepishly. “I think it was Pinkie’s turn?”

Brazen Gruff

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After two weeks, things began to return to normal. Twilight and Rarity both felt at ease now that they had come clean with their friends, who, after they had recovered from the initial shock, were insanely happy for the two. Pinkie had a cake baked, decorated, and delivered to the two the very next day, which they enjoyed while relaxing in bed.

Rarity was in an odd sort of limbo in regards to her place of residence. She didn’t exactly live with Twilight yet, but she had a key to the castle and Twilight’s bedroom, and you could most likely find her in the castle at any given time. Still, she returned to Carousel Boutique most nights and quite a few days, busied by her work and/or sister.

The princess, of course, wasn’t bothered by this fact. She wasn’t the one to deny company, especially from the likes of a woman as gorgeous as Rarity. Now that they had spilled the beans to their friends, neither Twilight nor Rarity could think of a decent reason to keep their relationship hidden from the public. Between Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie, neither of whom could keep their mouths shut, the secret would be out within a week anyway.

Even if they did somehow manage to keep a secret, the people of Ponyville, all of Equestria, really, were a talkative sort. Rumors would spread like wildfire, and they wouldn’t just remain in Ponyville. Four hours after Twilight and Rarity were seen holding hands and kissing in public, news of their relationship was spread all the way to a handful in Canterlot. Two hours later, and everyone in Canterlot, Celestia and Luna included, were informed. Within days, word spread from Appleloosa to the Crystal Empire, from Manehattan to Los Pegasus, that Equestria’s most eligible bachelorette was officially off the market.

One mare, unaware of the news, found herself in Ponyville, with the goal of courting the Princess of Friendship in mind.


Rarity truly couldn’t understand the mentality of some of the people in her town. Twilight had made it rather obvious that the castle was open to the public from Monday to Friday, with the doors opening at 9 in the morning and closing at 5 in the afternoon. However, as this day was Saturday, the castle became a private domicile, and nobody was meant to intrude. Twilight Sparkle may be a princess, but that doesn’t mean that she’s not entitled to a shred of privacy, and she certainly deserved the weekends to herself.

Which is why Rarity was a mix of perturbed and bewildered when she heard the door knock. If Twilight wasn’t busy reorganizing her room, Rarity likely would’ve ignored it. But, seeing as that would be terribly rude, and she was doing nothing better anyway, Rarity decided to investigate. She did take her sweet time getting there, though. If this person was going to be rude enough to pester them on their day alone, Rarity decided that she was not above making said rude visitor wait. When she did finally reach the front door, her hand grasped the crystal handle for a moment before she pulled open the door to, as kindly as she knew how, give the intruder a piece of her mind.

The unicorn on the other side of the door was immediately startling to Rarity. Her deeply violet face was covered in a maelstrom of piercings, on her lips, her right eyebrow, and her nostrils, and that’s not including the small rings all along the edge of her ear and the gaping hole in her lobes, stretched by a ring the size of a quarter. Her hair, which was a faded, greyish blue, was half shaved on her head, with the hair that remained draping flat over her left eye. As for clothing, which Rarity decided was the most terrifying, she wore all black, black boots up to her knees, black skinny jeans, a black t-shirt, all covered in a black trench coat that went way down to her knees.

“Hello,” said Rarity, after she properly took in all that she was seeing. “How may I help you?”

“Hey,” said the mare. “Is Twilight here?”

“Yes, but she-”

“Cool. Can’t wait to see her,” said the mare, walking straight past Rarity and into the castle. Rarity was, understandably, shocked, and it took her a few moments to react.

“Um… May I just ask why you’d like to see her?” asked Rarity. Then, she thought about what had just transpired. “And why do you think you can just walk into her home uninvited?

“I need to talk to her. Catch up, you know?” said the mare. “I’m Brazen, by the way. You are?” Rarity, again floored by this strange mare’s gall, took a few seconds to properly react.

“My name is Rarity, and I really think you should-” began Rarity.

“Where is this chick? She does live here, doesn’t she?” asked Brazen, strutting down the hall. Rarity grabbed a handful of her own hair, then chased Brazen all the way to the throne room. As soon as Brazen saw the six tall, crystalline chairs, she leapt into the one labelled with Twilight’s Cutie Mark.

“Twilight!” called Rarity. “You have… A visitor, I suppose. You should get down here, if you don’t mind terribly!” After a few seconds had passed, one could hear the sound of Twilight’s hooves against the cold crystal stairs. She soon presented herself, dressed in her favorite sweater and sweatpants. Not exactly the classy, elegant princess that one would expect, but Twilight was comfortable in it, and that was what mattered.

“What is it, Rarity?” asked Twilight. As soon as she heard the princess speak, Brazen lit up her horn with a dark, navy glow. She disappeared in a loud pop of light, returning to view next to Twilight, draping her arm around the princess.

“Hey, Sparky. Long time, no see,” said Brazen with a smirk.

“Oh my god! Brazen!” squealed Twilight, giving her a big hug. “I haven’t seen you in years! What are you doing here?”

“Geez, since when were you so huggy?” asked Brazen, shaking free from Twilight’s grasp. “I gotta stop by Canterlot, then I’m on my way to the Crystal Empire for a research trip. I decided to stop by Ponyville for a few days, and, when I found out you were this princess I’ve been hearing so much about, I just couldn’t resist paying you a visit.”

“Ahem,” coughed Rarity forcefully. Both Brazen and Twilight turned, as if Rarity had only recently manifested. “I believe some form of introduction is in order?”

“Right, sorry. Where are my manners?” said Twilight, smiling widely. “Rarity, this is Brazen Gruff. She and I used to be something of rivals back at Celestia’s school.”

“And by ‘rivals’, she really means that I was her mentor,” said Brazen, a cocky sort of laugh in her voice. “She was never as good as me. I trounced her at every turn.”

“Oh, so that’s how you remember it?” said Twilight. “Of course, you’re bound to have some memory loss. No doubt a side effect of showing up to every growth test plastered.”

“Ah, but did I ever fail?” asked Brazen. She flipped Twilight’s bang playfully. “And, if my drunken memory serves me right, I even got higher scores than you most of the time. Face it, Sparky. I’m just better at magic than you are.”

“Of course, it’s not entirely fair to compare us, considering we studied mostly different branches of magic,” said Twilight, fixing her mane. She was used to Brazen doing that. “Astral Physics and Arcane Arts don’t really translate well to… Sorry, what did you study again? Dragons, right?”

“I study Necromancy now, but Draconian Biology is still my thing,” said Brazen. “Speaking of Draconians, where’s that little drake of yours? He must be huge by now!”

“Spikey? Huge? Now that must be a joke,” said Rarity, who had been waiting most of that discussion to insert herself into the correspondence. “I’d be shocked if he was tall enough to reach my hip.”

“I love that little guy! Where is he?”

“He’s spending time with my sister. All things considered, they probably should get close,” said Rarity. “Considering-”

“Wait, your sister? How old is she?” asked Brazen.

“Eight…”

“And Spike is, what? Eleven now?” Brazen counted off the years in her head. “Yeah, eleven. You sure that’s a good idea?” Rarity and Twilight both looked to Brazen with bemusement. “What? Don’t you guys know what happens? Eleven is typically the age that dragons become… Active, to keep things PG-13. And an eight year old little filly? He might think she’s… Uh… Ripe.”

Rarity thought she was fairly intelligent, but it did take her quite a while to put together what Brazen was implying. When she did, she felt overcome by a sudden rush disgust, followed by an even bigger wave of anger. Within seconds, she was running as fast as her hooves could carry her, out of the castle and to the Boutique, leaving Brazen and Twilight alone in the throne room.

“So…” said Brazen. “What’s been going on with you? Besides becoming royalty, I mean.”


“Are you sure you can’t show me?” begged Twilight, leaning forward on the table. After Rarity departed, her and Brazen had migrated to the dining room table, where the two decided to talk shop.

“It’s not the type of thing I can just show off,” said Brazen. “I kinda need something to be dead first.”

“And if I can get you a corpse?” suggested Twilight. Brazen grinned madly.

“I question your sudden eagerness and apparent ability to provide me with a dead body,” she said. “But what the hell! Sure.”

Twilight lit up her horn, vanishing with a flash of light. She returned less than a minute later, with a dead songbird resting in her palm.

“My friend is an animal lover,” said Twilight. “She takes care of animals as best as she can, but they sometimes just die, like this bird.”

“Lay it flat on the table,” instructed Brazen. Twilight did as she was told, then used her magic to manufacture a pad of paper and a well-inked quill. Brazen rolled her eyes (some things really didn’t change), pressed her palms together, and began to concentrate. Immediately, Twilight began scribbling on her notepad, recording every detail of importance, and several that were apparently irrelevant. Brazen’s visible eye began to glow a bright, ghastly color of green. A gust of wind began to emanate from her very body, whispering something that Twilight couldn’t quite make out. The green from Brazen’s eye soon surrounded her horn and hands, and the whispers grew in volume, yet remained just barely incomprehensible. Quite suddenly, she pushed out her right palm in the bird’s direction. There was a sound similar to that of a fork against a ceramic plate, and the bird began to violently twitch. Brazen snapped her fingers, and the bird became perfectly still.

“Well, there you go,” said Brazen. “It’s alive. Since it’s a bit more on the simple side when it comes to complex organisms, the spell I used was pretty basic. Second level reanimation spells aren’t that hard, if you know the theory.”

“It’s not moving,” noted Twilight.

“Cause I’m not letting it,” said Brazen with a mysterious grin.

SLAM!

“And if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay the hell away from my sister!”

“Oh no,” mumbled Twilight, rising to her hooves. She ran out of the room, followed by Brazen, who only dawdled long enough to grab her new pet in her hand. When she and Twilight made it to the living room, they stumbled upon a situation in-progress. Rarity was yelling, waving her hands, and generally making a scene in the general direction of a very scared, very confused purple and green dragon.

“Rarity, calm down!” said Twilight. “Relax! It’s not his fault.”

“I’ll say! I didn’t do anything!” promised Spike, clutching his ear-spines gingerly. “We were just baking! I thought that you’d like some snickerdoodles, so Sweetie and I were making some.”

“Wait, you believed the whole mating thing?” asked Brazen, a devilish smile on her face. “I was just joking around. Everybody knows that dragons don’t mate outside of their species.” Spike looked confused for a second, then, when his eyes fell on Brazen, his expression became slightly irritated.

“Oh, hey, Brazen,” said Spike flatly. “Rarity, can I go back now? We have cookies in the oven.” Rarity, feeling both foolish and remorseful, tried to hug Spike. The dragon was in no mood, and shimmied out of the way before taking off for the door.

“And you can forget about trying one!” he shouted over his shoulder, punctuating his sentence with the sharp slam of the door. Brazen, who was on the verge of chuckling throughout the entire encounter, finally lost her composure and began to laugh like a maniac. Twilight was trying her best not to laugh, but the intensely confused and annoyed look on Rarity’s face made that battle impossible to win.

“I don’t quite see all that’s funny about this,” said Rarity through gritted teeth.

“Come on, man, that was obviously a joke,” huffed Brazen. “Anyone with a shred of Draconian knowledge knew that I was talking out my ass. It was common sense, really.” Rarity was slowly growing to dislike Brazen more and more with each passing second.

“I wouldn’t say ‘common sense’, considering I didn’t know.”

“Sparky knew,” Brazen grinned madly before throwing her bird in the air. She snapped her fingers, and the resurrected songbird twitched its wings, then soared around the room, fluttering down and landing right on the tip of Rarity’s horn.

“Wow! Amazing!” cheered Twilight. “Are you controlling it?”

“Yup. I didn’t let him move because he’d start freaking out,” said Brazen. “But he’s cool now, so I told him to sit right where you see him now.” Brazen smirked at Rarity. “You know, if I was just a little bit more mean, I could really get you messy here.” Rarity was fuming at this point, but she did a rather good job of keeping herself visibly calm.

“You know what? I think we could all do with a nice cup of tea,” said Rarity, waving the bird away from her head. “How do you take your tea, Brazen?”

“As coffee, and with three sugars,” Brazen laughed, apparently immensely entertained at her own wit.

“Wonderful,” said Rarity, with the most manufactured smile in her repertoire. “Twilight, my love, would you mind helping me in the kitchen?”

“Uh… Sure, Rares,” said Twilight with slight unease. “Uh, the library is that door to the left, if you wanna give it a look, Brazen.” She didn’t get to see or hear Brazen’s response, as Rarity quickly dragged her away. Neither said a word until they were past the dining room, in the kitchen, and in the process of putting together their drinks.

“Is there something wrong?” asked Twilight. Rarity glared at her girlfriend with enough intensity to cause a physical reaction.

“Are you serious? You must be joking,” said Rarity. “Her! What a rude, inconsiderate, smarmy… Ooh, I have a few words in mind for her!”

“Who? Brazen?” asked Twilight. “What’s your problem with her?”

“She’s disrespectful, for one! Aren’t you even a little bit offended that she just walked into your home uninvited?” asked Rarity. Twilight shrugged her shoulders, using her horn to move around cups and kettles and sugar dishes.

“Not really. We practically lived together for a long while,” said Twilight. “Besides, being polite isn't really Brazen’s style.”

“And it doesn’t bother you how she played that joke on me?”

“A bit, I suppose, but Brazen always had a weird sense of humor,” admitted Twilight. “Everything worked out fine, I think. No harm, no foul.”

“But surely you must be at least a bit upset by how she’s coming on to you?” tried Rarity. Twilight tilted her head in her signature “come again”? expression. “She’s hitting on you, darling!”

“She is not,” said Twilight adamantly. “I think I’d notice if she was hitting on me.”

“You didn’t notice when I was hitting on you,” pointed out Rarity. She glanced over her shoulder, as if expecting Brazen to suddenly appear before them. “Think about it! She constantly tries to snub me, she is trying to get you alone, she keeps blowing herself up to try to impress you. For the love of Celestia, she even has a cute pet name for you!”

“She’s always called me Sparky,” said Twilight dismissively. “And a pet name does not mean she’s hitting on me. Pinkie Pie has a cute name for you that I’ve never heard of before.”

“Did you just use Pinkie Pie to try to defend something as normal?” asked Rarity, raising an eyebrow. “I’m telling you, darling, she wants you, and she either doesn’t know or doesn’t care that you’re taken.”

“I think you’re crazy, and a little bit jealous,” said Twilight, loading a tray with tea and coffee.

“Fine. You think so?” said Rarity. “Kiss me, then.” Twilight grabbed Rarity gently by the shoulders and pulled her close, pressing their lips together in a warm, passionate, albeit surprising kiss.

“I meant in front of her, but I am not one to complain,” said Rarity. Twilight chuckled sheepishly, but understood Rarity’s plan. Although she thought Rarity was overreacting, she decided to play along, if for no other reason than to prove her wrong. What could go wrong.

Twilight lifted the tray by way of magic, then led the way out of the kitchen. Before they could even make it there, Brazen’s bird landed on top of Rarity’s horn, with a small scroll of parchment tied to its leg. It stood perfectly still as Rarity freed the note, unrolled it, and read it outloud.

“Gotta dash, Sparky, but it’s been fun catching up,” read Rarity. “Maybe we can meet back up when I get back from the Crystal Empire. Love, Brazen Gruff.” Rarity peered at the letter for a bit. “She wrote her number on this, with X’s and O’s beneath.”

“She just left,” said Twilight victoriously. “Still think she was hitting on me?”

“X’s and O’s, Twilight,” Rarity sighed. “You do know what that means, don’t you?” To demonstrate her knowledge, Twilight wrapped her arms snugly around Rarity, and pecked her on the cheek.

“There. Not as oblivious as you might think,” said Twilight with a smirk. Rarity kissed her back, this time on the lips. As their horns neared each other, the bird hopped from Rarity to Twilight.

“Are we keeping this bird?” she asked.


Brazen walked down the streets of Ponyville as quickly as she could, looking down the entire time. She reached into her trench coat and withdrew a small notepad and pen. She used her magic to free up her hands, which she used to turn a small, golden ring over in her hand. The pen met paper, and Brazen quickly began to jot down her thoughts.

Dear Diary,

Twilight was too oblivious to pick up on my advances. I anticipated this. What I did not expect was the extra variable in the form of a pre-existing love interest by the name of Rarity. She seems like a nice enough gal, and I almost feel bad for trying to steal her girl from her. Still, some things are more important than her, and this is one of them. After I’ve gotten my use out of Twilight, I’ll try to reconcile their relationship.

Regarding Twilight, her involvement with Rarity will complicate things. I don’t know how I’m going to advance, but hopefully I’ll find some sort of anti-love magic in the Empire. Unlikely, considering the place is run by a love goddess, but it’s worth a shot. Anything is worth a shot for Ivy.

Divine Intervention

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Twilight ran her hand down her darling Rarity’s soft, silky hair complacently, a pointless, calming practice that Twilight wasn’t even entirely aware of. It was a fantastic night, a perfect ending to an equally perfect day. The two spent all of their Sunday talking, reading, modelling, and experimenting with charms. In contrast to the fiasco that was Brazen’s Saturday visit, this Sunday was utterly calm and serene. After the day had run its course and the sun had gently set, the two had retired to Twilight’s bed, where a calm, warm sleep overtook them.

At some point, Twilight wasn’t sure when or for what reason, she awoke. She wasn’t jolted awake, nor was she startled by some loud noise, rather, she just faded out of the aether of sleep and into consciousness. She didn’t think she’d be able to fall back asleep any time soon, but that was fine. Twilight was perfectly content to sit in the darkness, stroking the mane of the woman in her arms.

It didn’t particularly bother her how Spike was hanging upside down from the ceiling, staring down at them, nor was she very concerned with the odd oil paintings of her own belly button that now hung in a ring around her room. These things were of little consequence in the grand scheme of the relaxing night.

“Hello, Twilight Sparkle.” Twilight herself couldn’t be bothered to pinpoint the source of the voice, nor did she care to respond. She continued to stroke Rarity’s silky locks, ignoring the shadowy figure that slowly appeared next to her. The figure, which seemed to step out of nothing, was entirely featureless, save for the bold cerulean beams the projected from where her eyes would be.

“It would appear that the connection is skewed,” said the shadowy apparition. “No doubt due to your young alicorn blood.”

“Who are you?” asked Twilight finally. “Can you keep it down? We’re trying to sleep.”

“Trying and succeeding, We’d say,” said the figure. “Please, try to stay focused, Twilight. We would like to speak with you.”

“About?” asked Twilight quietly. The shadow being’s dark face split, showing a curve of white light that resembled a smile.

“We always found this bit to be amusing,” said the shadow. “Open your eyes a bit, Twilight Sparkle. Try to make sense of your surroundings.” Twilight looked up to Spike, who had since fallen asleep, then to the paintings, which were now close-up photos of Rarity’s horn.

“It all seems pretty sensible to me,” said Twilight, still stroking Rarity’s mane.

“And doesn’t that frighten you?”

As if a spell had been lifted, Twilight snapped fully back into consciousness. Now, she was more than a little bit concerned about her surroundings. Spike really shouldn’t be up there like that, and Twilight was sure she hadn’t shot, developed, framed, and hung a baker’s dozen photos of Rarity, let alone her horn. Arguably the most shocking thing, however, was the form that the shadow now took.

“Do you see now?” asked Princess Luna. “We would like to do away with this little game, if you don’t mind.”

“P-princess Luna?” said Twilight. She was now, officially, confused. “I don’t understand. What’s going on? Nothing makes any sense anymore.”

“Perfect. That means we can now properly discuss,” said Luna. “Things rarely make sense in a dream, if ever.”

“Dream?” asked Twilight.

“Yes. We intended to visit you in the physical plane, but royal duties have come up,” explained Luna. “We noticed you were napping, and, as We have about ten minutes for lunch, I surmised that it would be efficient to speak to you now.”

Twilight sat up awkwardly, pushing Rarity’s head off of her lap. As she did, she noticed that she never really had Rarity in her arms. The entire time, Twilight was stroking and holding just her hair, with no body attached.

“This is bizarre,” said Twilight.

“Be thankful you were having a decent dream when I entered your mind,” said Luna. “We have lost count of the amount of times We have interrupted a less-than-pure stallion’s fantasy just for him to find that his partner had no face. The brain can only focus on so many things while asleep.”

Twilight shook herself slightly, trying to urge some shred of logic into the situation. Luna never just popped in for a visit, as delightful as that had the potential to be. No, the Princess of the Night always had an agenda, and, whenever she made an appearance, it was for business. Naturally, Twilight assumed the very worst.

“What’s happening?” she asked, her voice heavy with dread. She didn’t quite notice how the walls around her warped, almost as if melting. “What did you need to talk to me about?”

“Relax yourself, Princess Twilight,” said Luna. “For such a bright, cheery person, you have quite the streak of pessimism. There’s no looming threat or impending doom. I merely came to ask you about Rarity.” Now Twilight was very confused.

“What do you mean?” she asked. Princess Luna took a single step, yet somehow managed to appear just to Twilight’s left, sitting in a throne of lapis lazuli that Twilight certainly never saw before, let alone purchased and kept in the castle.

“You are a princess, an important one, too,” said Luna, crossing one leg over the other. “You and your friends are, for all intents and purposes, Equestria’s only defense. When something happens that may compromise any of you, my sister and I take it very seriously.”

Then, everything clicked, and Twilight started to laugh, causing her room to glow faintly and shake gently. Luna, while far from offended, was also quite a ways away from joining in on the laughter. She stared at her fellow princess, watching the young alicorn mare laugh with a sort of bemused curiosity.

“May I ask just what is so humorous?” said Luna, raising an eyebrow.

“I see what you’re doing, Luna! You’re trying to big-brother my relationship!” chuckled Twilight.

“I am afraid I don’t follow.”

“You, Celestia, too, both of you are afraid of losing me to someone who’s not worthy,” said Twilight with a smile. “You don’t want me dating someone you don’t approve us, so you’re trying to do background on me and Rares.”

“We… I…. That’s not…” Luna struggled to say the words she wanted, further proving Twilight’s point. “Be that as it may, Our reason for this is strictly professional. As We said before, you six are the sole defenders of the land. I cannot allow one of you to negatively affect the other.” Twilight giggled a bit more, which made Luna a bit more irate.

“You know, this entire thing may have been avoided,” said Luna, crossing her arms. “All you had to do was alert my sister or myself about your intentions to woo Rarity, and we would be significantly more relaxed about the whole thing. The fact that you had no intention of telling us leads us to believe that you are hiding something.”

“Sorry, Luna. We never really planned it to happen,” apologized Twilight. She bowed her head slightly. “We just sort of… came together. If it makes you feel any better, we didn’t really tell anyone. The others didn’t find out until about two weeks ago.” Luna sighed, relaxing herself slightly in her chair.

“We cannot fault you for falling prey to the sudden urges of your own heart,” said Luna. “Though, it would make Us… me… feel much more at ease if you were to inform me of such developments in the future, hm?”

“Absolutely, Princess,” said Twilight, smiling brightly.

“What does your family think?” asked Luna.

Twilight’s smile, which was ear-to-ear just seconds before, quickly fell into a dreading, terrified grimace. The walls of her room began to fade and lose some of their luster, as well as their consistency. Her grey jelly-walls were the least of her worries.

“Our niece approves, obviously, or she wouldn’t have let it happen,” said Luna, apparently unphased. “And, had Shining Armor objected for whatever reason, we would not be having this discussion, for he would have said it already.”

“Luna, wake me up,” said Twilight. “Wake me up right now! I need to tell them!”

“Tell whom?”

“My parents! Shiny! Everyone!”

“Twilight, you are being nonsensical,” said Luna. “Relax. I will awaken you. But, what must you tell them?”

“I have to tell them I’m with Rarity!" Twilight near shouted. She thought about it, the pit in her stomach growing. "I have to tell them that I'm gay!”

Luna wasn’t very good at reading people, or guessing reactions. She felt most people acted too randomly to accurately predict. But, even she could reason that Twilight’s parents would have liked to know this fact earlier, and they’d probably be outraged.

“I believe,” said Luna. “That what you need to say is what Ms. Pie classifies as a ‘drama bomb’.” Luna waved her hand, warping the reality Twilight was only now becoming accustomed to and slowly waking the Princess of Friendship from her slumber.


Rarity held out her finger, creating a perch for Caesar to land on. She quickly moved the songbird out of Twilight’s bedroom and down in the main chamber, where a hastily and magically created cage stood for him. Neither Rarity nor Twilight were certain whether they should keep Brazen’s little demonstration, though Rarity was leaning towards the “no” end of the spectrum.

Once Caesar the Songbird was safely secured, Rarity returned to the bedroom. Both she and her beloved Twilight were wearing lazy day bathrobes, tied tightly around the waist. Rarity loved the robes, because she spent several days and nights creating them just for her and Twilight. The effort paid off, as the robes were amazingly comfortable, as evidenced by how easily Twilight fell asleep in one.

Rarity stood in the doorway, watching her girlfriend sleep with a small smile. The princess, who was pretty cute to begin with, was down-right adorable in her sleep. Her mouth, slightly agape, dripped a tiny bit of drool from the corner of her lips. Something about her sleeping gave Twilight the illusion that, even while unconscious, she was still thinking. What truly set Rarity over the edge, what made her feel like she could sit and watch her sleep forever, was the snoring. The princess snored ever-so-slightly, just loud enough to be noticed, but low enough to be not only tolerable, but endearing.

“I don’t understand!” said a tricky, amused voice. “When you watch her sleep, it’s cute and romantic, but when I watch her sleep, it’s creepy and I need to leave the castle?” Rarity groaned, though she did manage to keep the brunt of her annoyance to herself. She knew the voice well, of course, and she truly did not want to have to deal with its owner.

“Hello, Discord,” said Rarity, quietly and through gritted teeth. “Would you mind coming out where I can see you?” Rarity’s robe shook and trembled, practically jumping off her body. A blur leapt from beneath her robe, flourishing into the mismatched, mischievous, pain-in-the flank draconequus. Discord stood on one foot, balancing just on the tip of Twilight’s horn.

“Hello, my dear, Rarity!” said Discord, as loudly as he could. “How are you, darling, it has been an absolute eternity!”

“Could you please quiet down?” demanded Rarity, “Twilight has earned a nap, I’m sure you agree.”

“Hm?” Discord looked down, as if he just noticed what he was standing on. “Oh, Princess Twilight here? That filly could sleep through a hurricane!” Rarity clenched her jaw angrily, mostly because anyone who knew Twilight could tell that she was typically a rather light sleeper. There was just no reasoning with Discord. He wanted to talk, so talk they would.

“What brings you around today?” asked Rarity, trying to be polite. Discord snapped his fingers, and a large set of noise-cancelling headphones appeared on Twilight’s ears.

“I am hurt, Rarity!” he said dramatically. “Offended! Humiliated, even! You two, my best friends, decided to shack up and you didn’t even tell me? I had to find out from Fluttershy! I feel like I deserve at least a phone call!”

“Discord, we never see you. The last time you decided to pop in was Pinkie’s birthday,” said Rarity. “Six months. You’ve never given us your number or address. I didn’t even know you got service where you live.” Discord snaked his way over to the seamstress, wrapping his arm around her. He withdrew a small slip of paper, scribbled some invisible pen on it, and passed it to Rarity.

“This just says ‘seven’,” noted Rarity. Discord nodded.

“Dial seven, ask for Sheryl, and she’ll put you through to me,” said the god of chaos, smiling widely.

“Who is Sheryl?”

“Haven’t the faintest! But don’t think you can change the subject!” Discord slipped back into his melodramatic tone. “You truly couldn’t be bothered to make contact with me? Am I truly that unimportant to you that you would keep such big, exciting news under wraps? I thought we were friends!”

Rarity was slowly falling into the trap. As much as she knew that she shouldn’t, she started to feel genuinely bad for not telling Discord. Even if she wasn’t ecstatic with the draconequus at any given time, she still valued him as a friend, and friends share news with each other.

“I mean, come on!” continued Discord. “I get that you told the others first, then your family, but really? You told Coco before you told me? I’m an A-tier friend, she’s C-tier, at best!”

“Discord, I am truly sorry,” said Rarity. “I should have found a way to tell you. I promise you, Twilight and I will keep you in the loop from now on.”

That seemed to be enough for Discord, who snapped again and removed Twilight’s headphones. He was just about to snap away when Twilight jolted awake, yelling, screaming, laughing madly, and generally carrying-on.

“Oh, this must be good,” snickered Discord. Twilight didn’t really seem to notice him, far too focused with the ripping out of her own hair. She looked to Rarity, her eyes rife with panic and self-loathing.

“What’s the matter?” demanded Rarity. She grasped Twilight’s hands. “Calm down, darling, it’s all going to be okay.”

“Rarity, I have an IQ of 195. I’m 26, and I’m on the fast track to two separate doctorates,” said Twilight, her tone akin to a dead mare. “I’ve mastered thousands of spells and charms, created hundreds of my own. I’ve completed a millennia-old spell that stumped the greatest unicorn mage of all time. I’m fluent in twenty languages, eight of which are dead. At the risk of bragging, I am a certified genius, in every sense of the word.”

“Yes…” said Rarity uneasily. “Um… Is… Is there a point to you listing your resume?”

“If I am so smart, then explain to me how I can also be a complete idiot at the same time.”

“Oh, it’s quite simple, actually,” said Discord, slithering around Twilight and leaning on her shoulder. “I know exactly how you feel! You can have all the knowledge in the world, but, sometimes, nothing is there! It’s hilarious!”

“What ever do you mean, darling?” asked Rarity, trying her best to ignore the unwelcome third party.

“I forgot to tell my family,” groaned the princess, falling flat on her back. “Shining, Cadance, my parents. I still have to tell them everything.”

Rarity sighed in relief, then gasped in absolute, one hundred percent, unadulterated terror. She couldn’t muster any words for a while, instead letting out a long, low whining sound. It was so bizarre that even Discord was slightly concerned.

“Rarity?” he asked. “What ha-. Oh, my word.” Discord’s brain quickly wired the situation together, and his already cheshire grin spread even wider. “You neither? Hahaha! How is that possible?!”

“Wait, what?” asked Twilight, snapping out of her own sort of daze. “You didn’t tell them about us?”

“No,” said Rarity, her voice barely a whisper. “Not even Sweetie Belle. She… Oh, no. We have to tell them! I can get my parents down for dinner tonight, what say you? When can you get your parents over? We need to do this sooner, rather than later.”

“We already put it off too long, as it is,” agreed Twilight. She gulped loudly. “However… I think we should tell your family first. Give me a week or two so I can… Ease mine into the waters.”

The tension and discomfort flowing from Twilight was as dense as it was extreme. Discord dropped his smile, and peered thoughtfully at her. She had a very particular look and posture to her, one that Discord felt he’d seen before. Yes, it was definitely familiar. The look she had when approached with the idea of talking to her parents was fear, bordering on contempt. The look on Twilight’s face was that of a girl with daddy issues.

“Wouldn’t you know it?” said Discord. “Fluttershy and I were due for tea thirty minutes ago! I had better take my leave, if you have no objections.” Without bothering to wait for a response, Discord snapped his fingers, vanishing in a flash of light. Twilight pulled at her hair nervously, her unease quickly infecting Rarity.

“Darling, you really should calm down,” said Rarity, as soothingly as possible. “You’re getting yourself upset. I doubt that they’d be horribly cross with you in the long run. There’s no need in procrastinating here.”

“I’d normally agree with you,” said Twilight. “However… And I don’t mean to sound rude here, but… You don’t really know what you’re talking about.”

“Beg pardon?”

“Has it never struck you as odd that you’ve never met my folks?” asked Twilight. “Believe me, that is no accident. You’re going to have to trust me on this one, Rares. I have to take this one slow, plan it out.” Rarity didn’t like the way Twilight was speaking very much. She was far too stressed. It was a bit scary, watching the strongest willed person in your life have a proper breakdown. Whenever it happened, Rarity felt part of herself weaken, a certain helplessness gripping her at the sight of Twilight, who was her world, essentially pulling herself apart.

But, this time, it was different. Before, Rarity was merely looking on as a friend. Now, she was a pillar. She could be a rock, which was what Twilight needed now.

“Whatever you think is best, love,” said Rarity. She flattened herself down on the bed, her hand resting gently on Twilight’s stomach, her face nuzzling against the princess’ neck. “Nobody is rushing you here. You can tell them whenever you’re ready, I’ll be there with you every step.”

Twilight tilted Rarity’s head up, then kissed her softly. Rarity’s warmth did a great job of helping Twilight keep back the tears, and the seamstress’ soft, lavender-painted lips against her own alleviated most of the panic. Still, Twilight couldn’t help but scare herself with her own thoughts. She could tell her parents whenever she was ready, but the princess didn’t think she ever would be.

Fortunately, Rarity’s kiss was making it rather difficult to concentrate on how ready she wasn’t.

Peditum Promotus Regina

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Brazen sighed before taking a big gulp of hot coffee. She had a lot of reading to get through, and, as the library didn’t close, Brazen would be there all night studying. She wondered if Crystal ponies even needed to sleep.

She had a large stack of books to her left, some of them magical tomes and some of them acting as translators of sorts, helping her transcribe the ancient language into one she was a bit more familiar with. She did this on some of the several feet of parchment she had brought along with her, scribbling notes and incantations and potion recipes and enchantments.

It was grueling work, mostly due to the convoluted method of which Brazen had to read most of the text. Some sentences required a half of a page in order to properly translate. Still, Brazen scribbled away, undisturbed for most of the time. Occasionally, she’d leave her seat in order to get a drink or snack, but she was never gone for longer than five minutes. Back at Celestia’s school, Twilight had been a veritable tyrant in regards to the study group, and Brazen was suddenly thanking her for it. Twilight’s study methods were hammered into Brazen’s head, and now she had the ability to do work that would normally take her all day in the span of a few hours.

As Brazen copied over the spells and formulas, altering them slightly to suit her needs, she felt as if someone was watching her. Every time she would look up, though, there was nobody to be found. From what Brazen could tell, the entirety of the third floor, where she was studying, was deserted. Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling.

She worked despite the growing paranoia she was experiencing. With every line she transcribed, the unease in her gut grew. An hour passed, and still nothing debunking nor legitimizing her slight panic had arrived.

Another hour, and Brazen had nearly convinced herself that there was nothing to be afraid of. She had gotten up several times for new books, and still there was nobody there. Brazen sighed, trying to eliminate what remained of her fear before buckling down and getting what she came for.

A soft hand grasped Brazen’s shoulder, the gesture sending a spike of panic through the necromancer, even though it was nothing if not gentle. Brazen, in her fit of fear, completely forgot her specialized, untrackable teleportation spell, and simply sat there for several moments before the owner of the hand decided to speak.

“Hey, there. How are you?” she asked. Brazen slowly turned around, and her heart fell into a pit in her stomach when she saw who was talking to her. Her dress was a beautiful, elegant purple, the silk draping down her tall, thin figure. She had on a small smile, though it was clear that she wasn’t as happy as she appeared. She seemed to be trying to flatten her wings against her back, apparently deciding that her long horn was more than intimidating enough. Standing behind the Princess of Love, adorning full crystal armor, was her husband, Shining Armor. He, as opposed to his wife, made no attempt to conceal his displeasure.

“Uh…” groaned Brazen, trying to think of how to eliminate any and all evidence of her work. “I’m… I’m fine, Princess Cadenza.” Cadance laughed slightly forcefully.

“Oh, there’s no need for that,” said Cadance. “Cadance is fine. I don’t think I caught your name, though.”

Every single fiber of Brazen’s being screamed at her to lie.

“Brazen Gruff. Nice to meet you?” said Brazen. As soon as she said it, she wanted to kick herself directly in the face.

“So… I’ve been watching you work for the past few hours,” said Cadance. “Must be some project, hm?”

A school project would be the absolute perfect excuse to why Brazen was digging through dark magic books. She could very easily manufacture some bogus story about a homework assignment regarding the negative effects that necromancy has on the caster. However, as she was legendarily bad under pressure, her brain didn’t pick up on that lead until after she had already opened her mouth.

“Not exactly,” said Brazen. “Just… reading.”

“You see, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell Shining Armor,” said Cadance, gesturing to her clearly guarded husband. “But he can’t quite see that. He thinks you must be up to something.” Brazen regained some of her brain’s higher function, and didn’t immediately make things worse for herself.

“Why would he think something like that?” asked Brazen, bringing her cup to her lips. She had finished the coffee ages ago, but she took a “sip” anyway.

“Maybe it’s because you’ve got several books on dark necromancy and love curses on your table,” said Shining Armor. “Books which are illegal to have anywhere but here, by the way.”

“It’s a good thing I’m here, then,” said Brazen, regaining some of her sharp wit. “Last time I checked, it’s not against the law to read books in a public library. And if these books are so terrible, why even have them?”

“Old Empire laws that I’ve been having issues working around,” said Cadance. “But, you’re right. We can’t fault you for reading.” Brazen relaxed slightly. “However… I admit that I am curious as to why an honest, hard-working, good samaritan of the Crystal Empire needs those kinds of books.”

“With all due respect, your highness,” said Brazen, leaning back slightly. “I admit that I’m curious as to why you think that’s any of your business.” Shining Armor was about to open his mouth, but was stopped just in time by a small wave from his wife. The Princess of the Empire strode around the table and deposited herself in a chair across from Brazen.

“I think you’re misunderstanding what I’m trying to do,” said Cadance. “I don’t mean to be hostile. I’d just like a nice, friendly conversation.

“Got a chess board?” asked Brazen suddenly.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Well, you want to have a nice, friendly conversation,” Gruff explained. “Right now, we’re basically strangers. The friendliest thing I’m capable of doing is a game of chess. It’ll lighten the atmosphere a bit, don’t you think?” Cadance bit her tongue slightly, clearly contemplating the suggestion. Finally, she decided that there was no harm, and sent Shining out for a board. He returned a short second later with a solid oak box and a gleaming crystal chess board, the light spaces a soft lavender and the dark spaces a violet as deep as Brazen. Shining set the board down, popped open the box, and set the pieces, one by one. The pieces were of an indeterminate material, but Brazen guessed that they were made from exquisite ebony and ivory.

Brazen took the black side, leaving Cadance with the first move. Studying Brazen more than the game, she sent her A1 pawn forward two spaces. Brazen, also focusing intensely on her opponent rather than her moves, mindlessly sent her D7 pawn forward two spaces.

“So, Ms. Gruff,” said Cadance. She moved her knight from B1 to C3. “Where are you from?”

“Canterlot,” said Brazen, moving that same pawn forward. “Lived there most my life, until a couple years back. Decided I was fed up with the living, so I went down and built myself a little house just outside Appleloosa.”

“Interesting. Quite a drastic change, hm?” noted Cadence. She moved rook from A1 to A3. “What do you do there?”

“I’m a mortician. Dealing with the dead is easier and more fun than dealing with the living.” Brazen captured the white knight. “When I’m not poking at the dead, I’m trying to find ways to bring them back.”

“You are aware that necromancy on ponykind is against the law, aren’t you?” asked Cadance.

“That’s why I’m just trying,” snorted Brazen.

The game continued, although it can be argued that the mental chess match was more interesting than the physical one. Brazen was on the defensive the entire time, with Cadance hammering away at her psyche with apparently innocent questions. Where’re you from? When’s your birthday? What do you think of the Empire? Every question sent Brazen into another mini fit of panic. She was so disoriented by the apparently friendly and good-natured personality of someone who could easily ruin everything that her gameplay was suffering. She made several sloppy mistakes, one of which resulting in the loss of her queen. She recovered quickly, and her pawn was soon only a few spaces from the other side of the board.

“Why bother with these books?” asked Cadance. “Why do you want to know about raising the dead or charming people’s hearts? Those two don’t go together.”

“Promotion,” said Brazen. She moved her C5 knight to B3.

“I’m afraid I don’t follow.”

“In regards to chess, I mean,” Gruff elaborated. “The rule of promotion. If you manage to get your pawn all the way to eighth rank, past enemy forces…”

“It can become a queen,” nodded Cadance, advancing her pawn forward. Brazen shook her head, as if Cadance had never said anything more foolish in her entire life.

“It doesn’t get to become a queen. Promotion is the wrong word to use,” said Brazen. “You throw the pawn away in order to regain something more important. Most times, it’s the queen. You know, most people don’t think of it that way. The pawn, who was the underdog for the entire game, did something amazing, and we throw him out for something better. It’s cruel, but nobody really sees it that way. They see it as strategy.” Cadance nodded, but she didn’t really understand the situation any more. If anything, Brazen added even more mystery.

“What’s your point?” asked Cadance.

“My point is that these books are strategy,” said Brazen. “I’ve lost my queen, and I need to get her back. Who cares if I have to throw away a pawn in the process?” Brazen moved her pawn forward onto the last square, B1, then removed it and replaced it with her queen.

“Checkmate.” She tipped over Cadance’s king, used her horn to roll up her notes, and teleported away, all before Cadance or Shining Armor could say a single word to oppose.


“Check,” said Twilight, lowering her bishop gently down on the square. She was deathly nervous, scared beyond words. This could be either the beginning of something beautiful, or the end of it all.

“I can feel your tension, darling, you really do need to calm down,” said Rarity, using her rook to capture Twilight’s bishop. “They’ll love you. I’m sure of it. Dinner will go off without a hitch.”

“I’m not worried about tonight,” said Twilight. She held her hand over her knight, contemplating both her move and her statement. “That’s a lie. I’m really worried about tonight.”

“You know, honestly, I should be the one who’s scared,” said Rarity. “Even if they somehow don’t like you, what are they going to say? ‘Rarity, you’re 24 years old, a grown mare, and you’re not allowed to date a princess’?” Twilight decided against the knight and instead moved her pawn forward.

“Still, I want them to like me,” said Twilight. “I’m glad Spike is here. If they don’t like me, at least the food will be good.”

“They will like you, and the food will be inconsequential,” said Rarity. She pushed her rook forward, sitting it three spaces to the left of Twilight’s black king. “I believe that is mate, darling.”

“Not quite,” Twilight castled, and her rook was now opposite of Rarity’s king, which had nowhere to go. “That’s mate. Good game.”

“No need to try to make me feel better, love,” said Rarity, a small smile on her face. “I know that I’m dreadful.”

“Thanks, Rares,” sighed Twilight. “Chess really helps clear my head. I think I know what to do now.”

As if it were timed, the two heard the loud ringing of the doorbell, signaling the arrival of Rarity’s family. The two decided to greet them together, and rose hand-in-hand. Twilight tried to remember a few things that Rarity told her. Hondo and Cookie might already know. They were fairly laid back, so expect some jokes. Keep things simple. Keep things honest.

Twilight was quaking in her boots as she opened the door. Rarity’s parents, Hondo Flanks and Cookie Crumble, both had small, tearful smiles, and Sweetie Belle was grinning madly at the pair. Before Twilight could say a single word, Cookie wrapped her arms around the princess in a warm, motherly hug.

Twilight couldn’t help herself. She squeezed Rarity’s mother, and laughed happily at the tears that were streaming down her face.

Two Reasons Why

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There was never a moment when any of Twilight’s friends doubted her intelligence. More often than not, any question that any of them could ask could, and would, be answered by Twilight. She was never content to just be the bank of knowledge of the group, however. Twilight was the type to want to share her knowledge with anyone who would listen, and she made it her business to help others help themselves.

She always had a teacher-like air to her, and she had the uncanny ability to instantaneously dwarf your knowledge without sounding like a know-it-all. Her knowledge didn’t make her better by any stretch, at least in her eyes. Almost as if to prove it, she would ask questions herself, questions that, in turn, have you ask questions. The most common question was also among the most simple, yet answering the question was rare, and said answer was almost always immensely complex.

“Why?” repeated Rarity, for she was sure that she must have misheard.

“Why?” confirmed Twilight. She unlocked the door to her bedroom, kicking off her shoes as she strode to her closet. Rarity, out of an unbreakable habit, lifted Twilight’s shoes and hovered them over to the shoe rack.

“Hm… I… Why do you ask, curiously?” asked Rarity, mostly to buy herself some time to think.

“Well, if you’re gonna meet my parents soon, I think you should be prepared,” said Twilight. As she began to pick through her closet, she heard Rarity lower herself down onto the mattress.

“You think that they would ask me that?” Rarity nervously tugged at her own hair.

“I’d be surprised if they didn’t,” said Twilight. “Daddy is very… selective. If we want to get away with this, we have to make sure you fit his model.”

“Model?”

Twilight sighed. Now blessed with the gift of hindsight, she realized that she really should’ve explained at least some of this to Rarity, and her other friends, for that manner, over the course of the five years they had known each other.

“My father has a very… A very particular idea of what a woman is,” explained Twilight. “As far as he’s concerned, all women should fit a certain model. None of you guys do. You and Fluttershy are probably the closest, but there are some complications there.”

Rarity nodded, though she didn’t quite understand. Still, the very fact that Twilight didn’t come out and say it meant that she wasn’t quite ready to talk about her dad yet. That, or she thought she was being obvious, which was a possibility.

"I don't know, love," said Rarity. "I never thought... Well, that's not true. I... I don't know where to start..."

"Alright, let's make things a bit more simple," said Twilight, shoving her head into her closet in search of clothing. "How about the when? At what point did you realize that you were attracted to me?"

"Why, the very moment I saw you!" Rarity said. Twilight snickered in the closet, and Rarity soon followed. "Oh, I know how terribly cliche that sounded, but it's true. I always thought you were cute, but I never thought to pursue you at first." Twilight stowed that bit of knowledge in her mental notepad. She, of course, knew exactly where Rarity was coming from, having experienced the very same feeling.

"And your sudden desire?" continued Twilight. "It wouldn't have anything to do with my transformation or promotion, would it?"

When Twilight was but a mere unicorn, she was a very different person in terms of physical appearance. She was thin, short, and had a sort of sickly look to her skin. Besides that, she was also very flat in the chest and rear, lacking the "assets" that she so envied in Pinkie and Fluttershy. After her ascension to alicorn, however, that all changed. Being that alicorns adopted the symbolic role of mother to all ponykind, and embodied the traits of all three races, it was fitting that her body changed to reflect that. She became very curvaceous, a proper, womanly form. She gained the toned stomach and arms of a Pegasus, the long, elegant limbs of a unicorn, and the thick, powerful thighs of an Earth pony. There wasn't a mare or stallion across all of Equestria who denied her beauty.

"I supposed that might have, perhaps, coaxed my bravery," admitted Rarity. "But I assure you, I am not so shallow that your looks are the only things I care about!"

"And how do i know that you're interested in me, rather than my position as princess?" asked Twilight, finally emerging from her closet with her arms full of clothes.

"Twilight!" exclaimed Rarity. She was clearly offended, disgusted by the very idea.

"Just playing devil's advocate here," said Twilight. "My father is going to ask, so you need to have an answer ready." Rarity pondered for a moment, staring down at her hooves in thought. Unbeknownst to her, Twilight slowly began to strip.

"I fell for you long before your ascension," said Rarity. "I don't know exactly when, but it was long before that." Though she knew Rarity couldn't see her, Twilight nodded in agreement as she stepped out of her pants.

"Good answer. If you can, try to remember exactly when. Dad's a stickler for details," said Twilight. "He's going to ask you why you're interested. What do you see in me? What makes you think you're good enough, things like that. What are you gonna tell him?"

The answer was simple, yet, it was also impossible to discern. The biggest problem Rarity was having, even bigger than her insane fear of a man she'd never met, was that Twilight was just too amazing. Rarity couldn't properly articulate just what it was that she found so alluring about Twilight without making it seem insignificant. It was hard, if not impossible, to do her justice. She was the quintessential perfect woman, powerful and gentle, ambitious and loving, intelligent and gorgeous. The fact of the matter was that Rarity was dating a demigoddess, a thought which has kept Rarity awake on several nights.

"Before I met you, I used to look at myself and see something that managed to imitate perfection," said Rarity, running her hand through her mane nervously. "Then, you show up, and I realize how truly insignificant I really am. You were Celestia's favorite student. I make dresses for a living! One of us clearly has more potential than the other."

Rarity snickered, both at how foolish she used to be and at the twist of fate that resulted in this conversation. Just yesterday, they were laughing and having a good time with Rarity's family. Today felt more like a drill or a trial, one that Rarity was determined to pass.

"You intimidate me, but I can't get enough," said Rarity. "I find you intoxicating and comforting, but still a bit scary. I want your respect, I want to prove that I'm worthy of you, because I know I'm not. I want to be there for you if you ever need me, I want to be able to carry you through thick and thin. I want to be good enough, but I'm not, so maybe, if I can pretend for long enough... Maybe I will be."

Satisfied with her speech, Rarity suddenly remembered to breathe, and took in a huge breath. There was silence for a few moments, where both women decided to let the other one speak first. Rarity was about to accept this challenge, and turned to get a read on her princess. Before the words could even form in her brain, they were quickly and ruthlessly beaten out by the image before her. Because, while Rarity was speaking, Twilight was still undressing. Rarity, in a flip of luck, just happened to turn right after Twilight removed her bra.

"Uhhhhhhhhhh..." Rarity couldn't muster words for a while. Instead, she produced a sort of whine that persisted for about a minute, only stopping when Rarity realized that she was staring. She had to think, quickly. What was she saying before?

"That was amazing," said Twilight, oblivious to the powerful charm she had put on Rarity. "I... I don't know what to say, honestly. I... Wow."

"Well, those are two reasons why, anyway," said Rarity, still stuck in a sort of glitched state. Twilight finally put two and two together, and then she started to laugh.

"Oh, please don't say that to my dad!" she chuckled. "'Two reasons why, Mr.Light, right there on your daughter's chest'. Not the best thing to say when trying to win this man's blessing."

Then, Rarity's mind rebooted, and she realized what she just said. The next five minutes were spent with Rarity trying, and failing, to properly explain herself. Of course, Twilight found the entire situation to be absolutely hilarious, and she continued to laugh for the entire duration.

After a while, Rarity decided to run down to the kitchen to fetch herself something to drink, and Twilight had her fill of fun. The princess entered her bathroom, drew her bath, and slowly lowered herself into the warm, soothing, bubbly water. She let her stress melt away, taking in a deep breath every now and then, followed by a long exhale. Rarity’s answers were good. They were genuine, they were romantic, and they would be relatable and understandable, even to Twilight’s dad.

Yes, Rarity was ready to meet Twilight Velvet and Night Light. Unfortunately, Twilight was far from it.

Rarity's Morning Coffee

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Over the course of the next several days, Twilight noticed something change slightly in Rarity's behavior. She first noticed it two weeks after the dinner with Rarity’s parents, though, as she thought on it, Rarity had been like this for quite a while. It just seemed to have been exacerbated in the recent days.

Twilight, unsurprisingly, followed a very rigid and efficient daily routine. She would wake at 6 AM, then take a quick shower. After she was clean, dry, and dressed, Twilight would brew herself a cup of green tea, gather up a roll of parchment and a quill, then sip her tea while she wrote up the day’s schedule, never failing to finish both tasks by 6:43, at the absolute latest. Then, she’d wake Spike, which could take anywhere from five minute to an hour, give him his list of chores, then wake Rarity. This was shockingly the hardest part.

“Rarity! It’s 8:45!” said Twilight, shaking her girlfriend gently. “Honestly, I don’t know how you keep the Boutique open if you’re this lazy!”

“Ugh…” groaned Rarity. She batted Twilight’s hand away, turned on her side, and resumed her sleep.

“Rarity! Come on, we have work to do today! Did you forget?” asked Twilight, trying, and failing, to stir the mare in her bed. “If we don’t have those wetsuits done and charmed on time, I’m gonna look really bad!” Twilight and Rarity had volunteered a few days prior to design fifty enchanted wetsuits for Ponyville High School, so they could take a field trip to visit the Seaponies. The deadline was in five days, and work hadn’t even started. Unless Twilight wanted to be known as the evil princess who crushed the dreams of marine-loving children, progress needed to be made.

“Rarity!”

“Fine, I’m coming,” mumbled Rarity. In the span of what Twilight estimated to be several eternities, Rarity slowly and grumpily sat up in bed. Without a word, she got up, and walked to the bathroom. Deciding to accept that as a victory, Twilight ran downstairs to the kitchen and brewed a fresh pot of coffee.

While she was pouring out a large mug of java, Rarity made an appearance. She clutched her robe as if it were the only thing keeping her alive, and she had a horribly irritated expression on her face. Twilight smirked slightly and offered the steaming mug to her.

“Ugh. Coffee?” droned Rarity tiredly. “None for me, thanks. I absolutely despise coffee.”

“What? How is that possible?” asked Twilight, taking a sip instead. “I thought people who hated mornings loved coffee.”

“People who hate mornings hate everything before 12:30,” grumbled Rarity. “Now, what are we due for today? Those damned wetsuits, correct?”

“Y-yeah. You need to sew them, and then they need to be hit with that waterproofing insulation charm,” said Twilight. “How many do you think we can get done today?”

“I’m not a machine, Twilight, I can’t just spit out projections for you,” said Rarity, her voice loaded with a bit more venom than she intended. “I’ll do what I can.”

Not much more was said about that, and the two went down to the main chamber to work. Rarity was crabby and grumpy for the first half of the day. It wasn’t until they broke for lunch did she seem to return to her normal, polite self. What’s more, she never seemed to acknowledge the difference, which further drove Twilight’s curiosity. This behavior just had to be new. There’s no way that she managed to ignore this for all the time they had lived under the same roof.

Whenever Twilight failed to come up with any sort of explanation for any occurrence, she went absolutely insane. Theories were written, research was done, and hair was pulled. She had to know why Rarity was suddenly such a non-morning person. More importantly, she had to find a way to fix it.


The next day

The next morning, Twilight woke Rarity just as she had the day before. Also like yesterday, Rarity had little to say while rising from bed, mostly just mumbling about how atrocious her hair must look. Twilight, exhausted in her own right for staying up all night, smiled sleepily before leaving the bedroom, running down the stairs, and preparing Rarity a cup of coffee.

A bath-robed Rarity walked into the kitchen, yawning as she did. Before she could even make it to the fridge, Twilight was on her, practically shoving the mug into her hand.

“I don’t like coffee,” said Rarity flatly. “Furthermore, I am offended by the implication that I need it. I am just fine, thank you. Just a bit sluggish.”

“Just try it,” urged Twilight. “I guarantee you, this is like no coffee you’ve ever had before.”

“I don’t-” Rarity’s sentence was interrupted by her own yawn. “Excuse me. I don’t want to try the coffee. What I want to do is get dressed, walk down to Sugarcube Corner, and buy as many scones as I can fit in my mouth. Care to join me?”

“I promise, you’ll like this,” said Twilight, not lowering or retreating the mug in the slightest. “I made it myself.” Almost against her will, Rarity snorted at that comment.

“Darling, there are twenty seven coffee makers in the castle, and those are just the ones I know about,” said Rarity. “Making a cup of coffee can’t be too difficult.” Twilight chuckled, then forced the mug into her girlfriend’s hands, leaving no more room for discussion.

“Ah, you misunderstood me,” said Twilight. “I made the coffee, the beans themselves. Cross-bred and enchanted them myself, you should love them!”

Rarity looked at Twilight with an annoyed, dismissive look, which was quickly and crushingly defeated by Twilight’s puppy-eyes. Groaning to herself all the while, Rarity brought the mug to her lips and took a sip of the scalding, bitter drink.

“So, what do you think?” said Twilight, grinning widely. “Be honest with yourself.”

“Wonderful," said Rarity, trying her best to sound convincing. "Positively amazing. I don't know how I lived so long without it."

"You hate it. You're just saying that so I'll leave you alone."

"My, you're smart," Rarity levitated the mug to the sink and dumped it down the drain. “Sorry, love, I can’t help it. I just can’t stand the taste.”

“Looks like I’ll have to try a bit harder,” said Twilight, racking her brain for another solution. “I can’t say I didn’t expect this. I’m sure I can come \up with an energy drink or something that you’ll like. It’s hardly the most difficult thing I’ve ever done.”

“Yes, I’m sure you’ll invent something wonderful,” yawned Rarity, with equal parts of exhaustion, sarcasm, and skepticism.

“Well, overcoming obstacles is kinda my thing,” remarked Twilight. “Challenge brings out the best in me.”

Twilight walked off with an odd look of excitement and determination, which left Rarity a little worried as to what her girlfriend had in store. Still, she didn’t have time to worry about that. She had to make herself presentable to the outside world. Given her grumpy, cloudy mood and her uncharacteristically messy hair, this might take a while.


Twilight was exhausted. In the past two days, she had slept for roughly three hours. She had to jump many hurdles and break many laws of physics to get her hands on what she hoped would help Rarity function a bit better in the early hours. The effort would soon prove to be worthwhile, for it would be the wake-up call that her darling Rarity deserved. Or so she hoped.

Twilight went about her schedule as was the norm for her: shower, tea, list, Spike, Rarity. And, once again the normal for the princess, the last step was the most difficult and overall unpleasant. Rarity rose drearily from bed, just as she always did, and vanished into the bathroom instantly. Twilight, who was too tired to notice, let alone be offended, quickly ran downstairs to put the finishing touches on her little potion. She leaned against the counter, her Florence flask filled with some glowing golden liquid and hovering over an artificial and magical purple flame

“Got something new for me to try?” asked Rarity, practically stomping into the room. “I’m willing to give it a shot, assuming it won’t make me gag.” Twilight grinned madly, then grabbed her flask. She cast a quick chilling spell on it, and handed it to Rarity.

“You have no idea what I had to go through for this, Rares,” said Twilight. Rarity was very taken aback by Twilight’s appearance: Her eyes were dark and baggy, and her hair was almost as messy and disheveled as her own.

“What is this?” asked Rarity, staring at it uneasily.

“I had to call Discord… Discord!” exclaimed Twilight madly. “I had to call him for this recipe! He made me travel through two different dimensions and play a demigod in a game of Horse for this,” Twilight laughed nervously to herself. “I haven’t played basketball in years! That potion, it’s an energy drink he calls Demon. It should solve all your problems. Try it. If it works, I’ll start brewing a larger batch right now.”

Rarity held the flask in her hands as if it might explode in her hands. She cautiously brought the potion to her lips, then, deciding not to stall, drained the whole thing in one huge swig. Both Rarity and Twilight eagerly waited for something to happen.

And they waited. And they kept waiting. After ten minutes, it was apparent that nothing would happen at all. Rarity tiredly shrugged her shoulders, unaware as to just how dejected Twilight truly was.

“I played basketball for this…” she said with a quiet sort of disbelief. “Discord knows how much I hate basketball… That greasy, slippery, son of a… Are you sure it’s not working?” As if to punctuate just how much of a failure the drink was, Rarity let out a loud, long yawn that was so tired, it nearly put Twilight to sleep.

“Well, you tried your best, darling, and that’s what counts,” yawned Rarity. The tiredness in her tone made her seem far more sarcastic than she was actually trying to be. “You know, it’s okay to fail sometimes. Nobody is perfect.”

“Rarity, I’ll see you tomorrow,” said Twilight. “I have a lot of work to do.”

“Are you kicking me out?”

“Oh, no, that’s not what I meant!” Twilight amended quickly. “No, I’m going down to my lab. Don’t expect to see me until tomorrow.”

“Your lab?” asked Rarity. But it was too late, for Twilight had already run off for that mysterious, formerly unheard-of laboratory.


True to her word, Twilight remained locked down in her secret lab for the duration of the day. She never emerged for food or drink, and Rarity found herself sleeping alone that night. When she awoke in the morning, it wasn’t from Twilight’s gentle nudging. Rather, she was awoken from the angry shoving and high-pitched squealing of an eight-year old.

“Rarity!” squeaked Sweetie Belle. “You butt!”

“Sweetie Belle, what are you doing here?” asked Rarity tiredly. She was more than used to this sort of treatment from her sister. “And don’t call people that. It’s rude.”

“Well, you are!” said Sweetie, giving one more shove for good measure. “You’re being a butt.”

“I am not being a butt!” Rarity managed to generate enough energy to sit herself up. She couldn’t believe the nerve of her little sister! She also couldn’t believe she just said the word “butt”.

“You’re a butt, and if you don’t stop being a butt, Twilight is gonna break up with you,” said Sweetie Belle matter-of-factly. “She’s a princess, so she doesn’t have to date a butt if she doesn’t wanna.”

There were several moments through their lives in which Rarity genuinely considered leaving Sweetie Belle on the steps of the nearest orphanage, and this was one of them. So many things, layered on top of each other, annoyed Rarity in so many ways: The early hour, her sister’s crude and childish nature, the implication that she was a bad girlfriend, and the very idea that Sweetie Belle had any idea of how the relationship between the two mares worked.

“Sweetie Belle, I am only going to say this once,” said Rarity. “Go home. I will not tolerate you breaking into Twilight’s house just to annoy me.”

“I didn’t break in, you butt!” said Sweetie. “Twilight let me in, and we had tea with Spike, and then she told me what a butt you’re being!”

“She called me a butt?”

“She didn’t have to! I know a butt when I see one!” Sweetie Belle was very, very upset with her sister, and Rarity could tell just by looking that her anger was genuine and well-founded.

“You mean about how I’ve been behaving lately?” asked Rarity. Sweetie Belle nodded ferociously. “I suppose I have been a bit crabbier than usual, but it’s truly not altogether my fault. I’ve been having a hard time sleeping, and-”

“Stop making excuses. You told me that there was never a good reason to be mean to a friend,” said Sweetie Belle. “Doesn’t that count for you and your girlfriend? It has the word ‘friend’ in it, so aren’t the rules the same?”

Rarity was about to open her mouth to retort, but she couldn’t find anything immediately wrong with Sweetie’s argument. She was completely right, of course, and Rarity couldn’t immediately come to terms with that.

“Oh my god…” gasped Rarity. “I’m being…I’m such a…”

“Butt?”

“I was going to say something along the lines of ‘grouch’, but I suppose so,” admitted Rarity. She rolled out of bed and rose to her hooves. “I have to make this right! Where is she?”

“She’s in her lab downstairs,” said Sweetie Belle, grinning from ear to ear. Her plan had worked. She gave Rarity a nod of confirmation, and the two made their way out of the bedroom, down to the main chamber, then down another flight of stairs, one that Rarity had never seen before. Sweetie Belle nudged her sister forward, and the two transcended down the dim, torch-lit staircase.

They arrived in a large, circular room. Lined against the wall were desks, tables, and unidentified machines that Rarity were afraid to even look at. The room had a constant dull roar to it, with noise from machines beeping and alchemy sets bubbling. Rarity was amazed how she’d never heard, let alone seen, this laboratory that Twilight apparently sought solace in regularly.

Twilight herself currently had her face buried in her arms, resting on a desk in front of some unknown, beeping machine. Above all the noise in the room, the most prominent sound was the snoring. Rarity smiled slightly to herself, lighting up her horn and grabbing a blanket from upstairs with her magic. She hovered it down to her hand, then gently draped it over Twilight’s sleeping body, leaving a small kiss on her forehead.

“I’ll make it up to her in the morning,” said Rarity. “For now, she rests.” Rarity shook her head in disbelief. “God knows she deserves it.”

“Rarity, I’m sorry I called you a butt,” said Sweetie Belle. Rarity sighed, then grabbed her sister underneath her arms, hoisting her into the air. With a little aid from her magic, Rarity swung Sweetie around and planted her on her shoulders.

“Don’t be. If I am being a butt, I’d rather hear it from you,” said Rarity. “Come on. I hear Pinkie Pie is making waffles at Sugarcube Corner.”

“Okay!” squeaked Sweetie. The two exited the lab, trying their best not to disturb the thoroughly exhausted princess. Rarity pursed her lips in thought, trying to decide how best to make things up to Twilight. She soon decided that the best way to make amends is to learn to wake up more gracefully. After all, Twilight only went through all this trouble for Rarity’s own benefit. With a smirk, Rarity decided that she didn’t need coffee or an energy drink. Twilight Sparkle would be her morning coffee.

Night Light & Twilight Velvet

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It was very easy to tell when Twilight was nervous. She had several tell-tale signs that she couldn’t hide if she tried. She would stop eating, she would giggle oddly and at inappropriate times, and, more than anything else, she would pace. Whether slightly anxious or dreading for the end-times, Twilight always found herself pacing. The severity of her nerves could easily be gauged by the distance of her passes, the length of her pauses before turning, and her overall volume for the duration. Awaiting a letter from her parents made Twilight the most nervous she had ever been.

It was a Tuesday that the couple would remember for years to come, one way or another. After several hours of workshopping, rereading, redrafting, and fine-tuning a letter that should have taken all of five minutes, Twilight was satisfied with her wording. It was polite, apologetic, with just the slightest hint of mystery. She knew her father wouldn’t be able to resist. She hoped that he would read the letter, pass it on to his wife and son, and the five would meet in Twilight’s castle for a meal prepared by Spike, where they would chat, sip wine, break the ice, and eventually come clean. It was a perfect plan.

Until Twilight recieved the letter stating that her parents had already sent for her, and that Shining Armor couldn’t make it. This changed a lot about the entire situation. For starters, having Shining there was the crux of the plan. Twilight needed a clear-headed middleman, especially if said middleman was biased in her favor. Everything Twilight knew told her to call off the dinner, to try again later. However, she knew that was impossible, so she had no other choice but to accept the ride from the chauffeur sent by her father, answering Rarity’s questions all the while.

“What exactly does your father do?” asked Rarity, too nervous to enjoy the luxury of the limousine in which they were riding. “I never knew he was so… financially privileged.”

“It’d be easier to list what he doesn’t do. Professor of about a million different branches of sciences and magics,” said Twilight, her eyes glued to her lap. “Former military researcher, former head of the guard. I think he played college hoofball for a bit, too. Could’ve gone pro, Shining says, but he joined the guard instead.” She looked up to confirm the intimidation in Rarity’s eyes. “So, yeah, he does alright for himself.”

“What should I call him? Would he be offended if I called him by name?” asked Rarity. “Is he the type of man to want me to call him ‘Dad’?”

“God, no! Just… Mr. Light will do,” Twilight answered, tapping her hoof nervously. So many things could go wrong tonight. There were so many variables, many of them not only outside of her control, but incalculable. This could either be the best day of her life or the absolute worst.

“And your mother?”

“What about her?” Now it was Twilight’s turn to ask the questions.

“What does she do? She must be as intellectual and powerful as your father, no?” asked Rarity. “Surely she must have something to keep him occupied, in terms of mental aptitude.”

“Not really. My mom is a stay at home housewife,” said Twilight. She glanced out the window, her stomach constricting when she realized just how close they were. “Thanks, by the way, for changing your outfit so suddenly.”

Rarity had originally wanted to wear a sexy single-sleeved black dress of her own creation to the dinner, but, after Twilight manic shoutings and pleads for her to reconsider, she finally decided on a longer, slightly more tasteful (and less fabulous, as Rarity was quick to point out) yellow sundress.

“Oh, it was nothing, dear,” said Rarity, running her hand down the pale yellow fabric thoughtfully. “Now that I’m blessed with the gift of hindsight, I realize that dress may be best suited for another occasion. I do wish you would’ve let me find something for you, though.”

Twilight was dressed as she normally was; A semi-formal purple sweater vest, a purple and pink school girl-like skirt, and a pair of black flats, contrasting starkly with Rarity’s gold six-inch heels.

“It’d be weird. I never dress as nicely as you do,” explained Twilight. “My dad would know something’s up.”

"We are approaching the estate now, Ms. Sparkle," said the driver.

“T-thank you,” said Twilight nervously. She took in a deep breath, then switched into “battle mode”, adopting the same mindset and attempts at calm as she did when battling the likes of Lord Tirek.

“When we get inside, do not try to hug my father or even shake his hand,” warned Twilight. “He hates physical contact. Just smile politely, say your name when he asks, and try to answer any questions. I’ll handle the rest.”

“Your worrying is starting to worry me,” said Rarity. “Please, calm down. For my sake, if not your own.” Twilight tried her best to steady her breathing and to shake off the nagging in her gut, but she still felt like everything was going to go horribly wrong.

Time shot past and, before they knew it, they had arrived at the massive estate of Night Light and Twilight Velvet. It was four stories tall, with easily over forty rooms. According to Twilight, the whole of the uppermost floor was used as a massive library. There were rooms for the help, in the form of maids, cooks, drivers, and groundskeepers, all of whom lived on the premises. Twilight promised that they’d probably never even see most of them.

They exited the limousine together, then proceeded into the house. With Twilight slightly ahead of her partner, the two were lead by a housekeeper down a long hallway decorated with many fine paintings, down into a large dining room. Besides the entrance, there was a door on the opposite end leading to the kitchen, several feet behind the head of the table. The table itself, exquisitely set with the finest of silver, sat right in the middle of the room, bathed with the glow and warmth from the fireplaces in the walls and the burning candlesticks that made up its centerpiece. The room was far from dim, but it had a certain ominousness to the lighting that made Twilight feel like her father had done it with the intention of intimidating her.

At the head of the table was Night Light, dressed in a dinner suit so exquisite and classy that Rarity found herself envious of whoever designed it. The blue unicorn had a look to his eye, shining disapproval and inevitable judgement outwards. To his right was his wife, the grey skinned, blue eyed mare Twilight Velvet. It was clear from whom Twilight Sparkle took her appearance, as she had a striking resemblance to her mother. Rarity had always heard that if you want a good look of your woman in the future, you look at her mother. A quick glance at Twilight Velvet eliminated any fears or complaints that Future Rarity could ever have.

“Hi, Daddy,” said Twilight nervously. “Hi, Mom.”

“Hello, dear, come, take a seat,” said Twilight Velvet. “Dinner should be ready quite shortly.”

“And then we all can have a nice, long chat,” said Night Light forebodingly. Rarity, deciding to abide by Twilight’s rules and keep her mouth shut, followed Twilight to the left side of the table. She took a seat next to her lover, her sat as far from her father as possible without it seeming as if she was trying to avoid him.

“So…” said Twilight awkwardly. “I-”

She couldn’t get another word out, because the kitchen doors burst open. A trio of stallions, a black skinned, white haired pegasus, a ginger unicorn, and a dark, red maned Earth pony, emerged from the kitchen, with warmed carts and covered plates in tow. Without a word to anyone, they went about laying out the food on the table, making quick work of the task. They finished as quickly as they started, and were on their way out when Twilight Velvet stopped them.

“Silver, would you be a dear and fetch us some wine?” asked Velvet.

“Of course, ma’am,” said the white haired pegasus, bowing slightly. “It’ll be right out.” The three left with their carts, leaving Night Light to uncover the plates and dishes by magic, revealing the delicious meals they hid. A few moments later, the pegasus known as Silver returned with two bottles of expensive fine wine, pouring a bit of the red liquid into four wine glasses. He placed a glass next to each diner’s plate, bowed again, then left into the kitchen.

“Now, Twilight, I am a little disappointed that you let this fallacious rumor persist for as long as you did,” said Night Light. “But, I suppose it is better late than never.”

“R-rumor?” asked Twilight.

“Oh, of course. You wouldn’t believe the shock your father and I had when we heard what those awful people are saying about you,” said Velvet. “Some of our staff had the audacity to perpetuate these false claims. We had to let them go, of course.”

“I imagine you came all this way just to tell us what we already knew?” asked Night Light. “Twilight, you need to start thinking about your image. People these days just love to talk, and you don’t want or need the mindless masses ruining your reputation and, by extension, ours, as your parents.”

“Wait, wait, hold on a second,” said Twilight. She should’ve known better than to let her dad start the conversation. Once he had control, it was hard to take it away. “What rumor are you talking about?”

“Oh, dear,” gasped Velvet. “She doesn’t know, Night.”

“Which explains her lack of concern for the issue,” nodded Night Light. “Which is a whole problem in of itself.” He turned his intimidating golden eyes onto Twilight, frowning slightly. “Self-awareness is very important, especially for someone of your stature. Things that you don’t know can hurt you.”

By this point, Twilight was a bit frustrated and Rarity was even more uncomfortable. She wasn’t sure what she expected in Twilight’s parents, but this wasn’t it. Twilight had a sort of down-to-earth, small town humility that you just didn’t see in her parents. Twilight had no delusions of grandeur nor the belief that she was any better than the next mare, while Night Light, at least, certainly seemed to think so. It was night and day, so much so that Rarity began to wonder if Twilight had ever even lived with her parents.

“Alright, I get it. I need to be more aware,” said Twilight. “But, since I’m not, would you mind humoring me? Just this once? What rumor?” Night Light sighed, shaking his head slightly as he did.

“There’s been a rumor going around,” said Night Light. “That you have been… pursuing a romantic relationship with some common Ponyville mare. Absolutely ridiculous, of course, but we can’t have that marring your image.”

“I beg your pardon?” said Rarity and Twilight together, though they both had slightly different tones. Rarity was slightly confused, and Twilight was bordering on anger.

“Of course, we did what we could to keep things a bit quieter than they’d be otherwise,” said Velvet.

“Told anyone who would listen, which is, to say, many,” said Night Light. “We told them that our daughter, our alicorn princess, wouldn’t be involved with anyone beneath her, least of all some no-name Ponyvillian.”

“Then who would you have me be involved with, hm?” asked Twilight. “Someone ‘on my level’? Like who? Royalty? I don’t know if you’re aware, Daddy, but the only other alicorns are either several thousand years my elder or married to my brother.”

“I thought you were interested in Flash,” said Velvet. At the name ‘Flash’, Twilight felt her control over her anger slip slightly.

“Why would you ever think that?” she asked. “What indication did I give that even insinuated that I wanted anything to do with Flash, romantic or otherwise? Besides, how is a ‘common Crystal Empire stallion’ any better than a ‘common Ponyville mare’?”

“You are joking, aren’t you?” asked Night, with such a tone that made it clear that he saw no humor in the situation. “In any case, it’s not about who Flash is now, it’s about who he might become with you. Now, he’s a mid-ranking guard, but if he were to find himself in a relationship with you? His father would be very happy, I know that for certain.”

Twilight wasn’t sure what offended her more: the fact that her dad seemed to genuinely care about Flash’s development more than her happiness or the idea that Flash’s dad had leaned on Night Light to push her towards his son. Rarity could see the anger building in Twilight, and desperately wanted to say something. Words failed her at the moment, and she could do little more than stare at her plate awkwardly.

“Daddy, I told you already,” said Twilight, trying her best to be firm. “I don’t want to date Flash. That’s all there is to it.”

“But he’s such a nice young man,” said Velvet. “I’m sure if you gave him a chance, you’d come to like him.”

“I don’t doubt it, but I’m not interested in him romantically,” said Twilight, crossing her arms. Her father’s frown only seemed to grow with time, and he was near-grimacing by this juncture.

“And why not, Twilight?” asked Night, his patience running thin.

“I’m not going to explain to you why I don’t find him attractive,” said Twilight. “It’s not really any of your business, and that’s not why we came.”

“Yes, why did you want to see us? We thought it was to diffuse the rumor, but, as you have proven that you had no knowledge of such rumors, it seems that this was merely coincidence. What prompted you to invite us over?”

“Well, Mr. Light, Twilight and myself had something we wanted to tell you,” said Rarity, speaking up for the first time. “We… Or, perhaps you’d rather hear it from her?” Twilight glared at her girlfriend, rolling her eyes in disbelief. Way to take one for the team, Rares.

“We all know that I was sick a few months ago,” said Twilight. “Rarity was in the quarantine with me, and she looked after me.”

“Yes, and I believe the reason you’re still with us today,” said Night. “Is because Flash Sentry delivered your medication on time. Isn’t that enough reason to entertain the idea of dating him?” Twilight clenched her fists tightly, digging her fingernails sharply into the soft flesh of her palms.

“Can we shut up about Flash for just a second?” asked Twilight. “I am eternally grateful for what he did, but that’s neither here nor there. It’s not enough to give me romantic feelings for him?”

“Why exactly not?”

“Because I don’t like boys!”

The room went dead silent after that. Rarity, obviously the least surprised in the room, still found herself slightly taken aback by Twilight’s sudden outburst. Her tiny gasp was nothing compared to the other reactions in the room. Twilight Velvet had dropped her glass of wine, splattering her lap with red. Night Light opened his mouth several times in an attempt at speech, never properly forming words. Twilight Sparkle shrunk down slightly, clearly embarrassed by her inadvertent boldness.

“That’s why we came here, Daddy,” said Twilight, significantly more calmly than before. “I’m gay, and I think it’s about time you knew that. I-”

“No,” said Night Light. Twilight tilted her head in absolute bamboozlement.

“I… What? I don’t understand what you mean,” said Twilight. “What do you mean ‘no’?”

“As simple as it sounds, daughter of mine. No, you are not. The fact that you entertained such an idea for even a second is ludicrous, and to delude yourself enough to bring it to my attention is absolutely unacceptable. You are not gay. You’re a nice young woman.”

“If I may so interject…” said Rarity, unable to hold her tongue any longer. “I don’t quite see why she can’t be both.”

“Because nice young women don’t sleep around with that sort of crowd,” said Night Light through clenched teeth.

“I assure you, Mr. Light, your daughter isn’t ‘sleeping around’. We are intending to wait,” said Rarity. She raised an eyebrow at Night Light, almost challenging him. “We’re saving ourselves for each other.”

This time, Rarity was as stunned by Night’s reaction as Twilight was. He slammed his fist on the table, standing up so quickly that he knocked over his chair in the process.

“You? You’re the Jezebel who’s corrupting my little girl?” asked Night. “It’s you! Are you the reason she left Canterlot? Abandoned her studies?”

Up to this point, Twilight had been fairly irate. At certain instances, she even found herself genuinely angry. Upon hearing that trio of implications, however, Twilight felt as if her mane was about to catch fire.

“Wait just a second!” demanded Twilight. “There are so many things wrong with that, I don’t even know where to start! First of all, how could it be her fault? I didn’t even know her.”

“You’ve proven yourself to be capable of withholding the truth,” chimed Velvet. “There’s no telling how long you’ve been going with this little game.”

“Second, how dare you imply that I ignored my studies! I’ve done all I could, and tried to do even more, to continue learning and reporting to Princess Celestia,” huffed Twi. “And what if she was the reason I left Canterlot, huh? It’s not like you guys visited me or invited me over, anyway.”

“It looks bad,” said Night Light simply. “As does this, mind you. It’s time you got over your rebellious fantasies and started seeing sense.”

“They’re not rebellious fantasies, Daddy! I’m gay, I’ve always been gay!”

“No, you haven’t! Stop saying that, you know it’s not true! We’ve raised you better than that.”

“What’s so terrible about me liking girls? Why are you attacking me like this?” asked Twilight. “If Shining Armor wanted to marry a man, you wouldn’t be giving him this sort of treatment.”

“Your brother is different, dear,” said Velvet, attempting to sound soft and gentle. She really just sounded like she was holding in a sneeze.

“Why is he different?!”

“Because he didn’t wait until he was 21 to try and make something out of himself!” bellowed Night Light. “He’s been making us proud since he could walk, and you’ve done nothing but trail. Of course it’s different. And I assure you, if Shining Armor somehow convinced himself that he was gay, he’d be receiving the same sort of lambast.”

Now that stung. Twilight, of course, had always admired her brother, and with admiration eventually comes envy. She harbored no bitterness for Shining Armor, but she certainly did notice how it took her changing species for her parents to clear their calendars for her. Yet, somehow, Shining Armor never seemed to have this problem.

“You keep implying that she’s not actually gay,” noted Rarity. “According to you, she’s just deluded. I promise you, that is not the case.”

“My daughter is not gay, and that’s final,” said Night Light, crossing his arms angrily. “She’s normal. She is a perfectly nice, perfectly normal girl.”

“Who just happens to like other perfectly nice, perfectly normal girls,” said Twilight. She could tell that she was wearing her dad down. “We’ve been so quick to jump at each other, we haven’t even properly introduced. Daddy, this is my girlfriend, Rarity.”

“Pleased to meet you, sir,” said Rarity, standing and extending her hand for a handshake. Night Light ignored it, and it soon retreated to fold up opposite its partner by Rarity’s side.

“We’ve been together for months. She’s the real reason I recovered,” said Twilight. “I’m in love with her, and I’d like to marry her someday. Can you learn to live with that?”

Night Light struggled again to find the proper words, this time sputtering madly for a second. Once he regained his composure, he pushed himself up onto his hooves.

“Get out,” he said, pointing at Rarity. “Get the hell out of my house! I will not have you sitting here, trying to destroy my daughter. I won’t let your kind ruin her image.”

“Daddy!”

“I beg your pardon?” asked Rarity, properly angry for the first time. “What exactly do you mean by ‘my kind’, hm? If I didn’t know any better, I’d wager you were going to say something disturbingly rude.”

For a spectacular few seconds, Rarity was very pleased with herself. The shock on Night Light’s face gave Rarity the horribly naive idea that she had said something to convince him. Unbeknownst to her, Night Light was never the type to abandon what he thought to be right. He hated being made to look foolish, most of all by a woman. Silently, he circled around his chair, slowly crossing the room until he was nose to nose with Rarity.

“Listen here, you two-bit harlot. You are not welcome here,” snarled Night. “I won’t have you here, trying to ruin my daughter. She is a princess, a goddess. You are nothing. And, unless you wish to be less than nothing, you will leave my home, crawl back under whatever manhole you emerged from, and never speak to my daughter again. Are we clear?”

Rarity was aghast. She stared, wide-eyed, at Night Light, trying to fight back the tears she felt welling up. She looked to Twilight, who was appropriately and intensely furious. The fury that painted her face was unlike that of which anyone had ever seen. Before she could do so much as open her mouth, Rarity broke down. She ran away, choking out sobs as she fought with her legs to carry herself out of the dining room. Twilight felt her heart snap. She had never seen Rarity so distraught. It would take some work to get her feeling better, and there would be time for that later.

Currently, however, it was time for her to give her dad a piece of her mind.

“How dare you! Do you have any idea how you just made her feel?!” shouted Twilight. “Do you even care?! You think you can talk to my friend, my girlfriend, like that?”

“She’s not your girlfriend,” said Night plainly. “You don’t really love her.”

“That’s not for you to decide! Hell, it’s not even for me to decide!” Twilight felt her horn lighting up, as if it was going to start firing spells of its own accord. “Mom! Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I admit, I don’t agree with how Night delivered his message,” said Velvet. “But I do agree that you are confused.”

“I’m not confused, I’m-”

“A child, dear. You’re still young. You don’t know what love is.” Velvet got up, walked over to Twilight and, with audacity that Twilight wouldn’t be able to fathom for years to come, attempted to wrap her arms around her daughter.

“Don’t touch me,” snapped Twilight, pushing her mother away. “Do not speak to me like I’m a child. I’m older than you two were when you got together. You two make me sick! You’re supposed to love me and support me, and all you’ve done tonight is make me feel like dirt.”

“That wasn’t my intention,” said Night. “You must know that I have your best interests in mind. I’m your father.”

“No you’re not. If you can’t accept me or her, then you’re nothing,” said Twilight. “Now, if you excuse me, I have to go find her.”

Twilight turned for the door, just to be grabbed around the wrist by her father. She snapped, firing up her horn with the angriest magic she’d ever experienced. Her eyes began to glow bright white, and her very body crackled with intense, powerful fury. With an upwards flourish of her other hand, she sent an invisible wave towards her father, throwing him several feet in the air and pinning him in place over the table.

“Twilight Samantha Sparkle, lower your father this instant!” demanded Twilight Velvet. Twilight Sparkle waved her free hand to the right, pushing her mother similarly against the wall.

“This is the last time I hope to see you two. Don’t bother trying to contact me,” spat Twilight venomously. “I hope you’re happy. You were trying so hard to keep the image of your princess intact, but you end up losing your daughter.”

“Twilight, don’t talk like that,” said Night Light. “Lower me now, and we’ll talk about this. You can come back here, live with us, and we’ll work through this. We’ll find you a nice young man that you’ll like, someone you can properly love. We-”

Twilight released her spell, letting her father fall onto the dinner table. The impact knocked the wind out of him, pushing out whatever it is he intended to say.

“Bite me,” said Twilight, her eyes dimming back down to their usual violet.

She walked out of the room, making those the last words she said to her parents for a very long time. Several years later, when Rarity would ask about it, Twilight would say firmly that she had no regrets about that night, and she wouldn’t do it over if she could. Even that long after the fact, Twilight could recall vividly the hurt plastered on her love’s face. That face would be the subject of her dreams for days, and she knew that she would never be able to completely forgive the ones who made her feel like that. Rarity had quickly become the most important thing in Twilight’s life, and she’d be damned if she was going to let a little something like blood relations hurt her.


Twilight found Rarity just outside the grounds of the manor, the alabaster unicorn in a shocking state of disarray. Her eyes were puffy, baggy almost, and her mascara was leaving dark tracks down her face in conjuction with her tears. The very sight made Twilight tear up slightly.
Neither said anything to the other at first, until Twilight unfurled her wings and wrapped one softly around Rarity in the ultimate alicorn snuggle.

“I’m sorry,” said Rarity. “I didn’t want to come in between you like this.”

“I don’t know if it was obvious in there, but the two of us never really had the best of relationships,” said Twilight grimly. She pecked a tearful kiss on Rarity’s cheek. “It’s not your fault. Don’t blame yourself.”

“You should break up with me, right now,” said Rarity dejectedly. “I’m just some girl. You shouldn’t have to abandon your family just to appease me. That’s not fair.” Twilight felt as if someone had run a letter opener through her chest. Rarity’s voice wasn’t filled with just sorrow or regret. No, her voice was heavy with self-loathing, the very idea tearing Twilight apart.

“I’m not abandoning my family. You’re all the family I need,” said Twilight, pulling Rarity closer. “At least I know that you’ll always be there for me. I love you, Rarity. That’s what’s important, not Night Light or his wife. That’s what they are now; Twilight Velvet and Night Light, not Mom and Dad, understand? You’re more important than them.”

“I’m not,” insisted Rarity.

“Not your decision. Come on, babe. We have to catch the next train if we want to get home before it gets too late.”

Twilight interlaced her fingers with Rarity’s, squeezing the other woman’s hand gently, and the two went on their way. Rarity tried to apologize again, to truly put into words how much she regretted the night, how much she wished things could be different. She couldn’t find the words to properly convey how dreadful she felt. Instead, she quietly began to sob. Twilight gently hugged Rarity against her chest, stroking her mane gently.

“I know, baby. It’s okay, it’s not your fault,” promised Twilight. “We’ll get through this somehow.” Rarity wasn’t sure how that was true, but she knew it was. The tone of her lover’s voice conveyed such an air of control and knowing, it convinced Rarity not to question it.

Which was fortunate, because Twilight would have no ready answer if Rarity was to ask. This was one of those things that couldn’t be planned. They would get through it, simply because they had to. Twilight smirked darkly to herself. Had the situation been a bit different, she’d be going crazy at the not knowing. But, seeing as she had essentially just told her dad to screw off, she took a bit of solace in the future, and all of its mystery.

She may not know what tomorrow held, but it was almost definitely better than today.

Ivy

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Brazen stared at her work, trying to get everything together. A stack of formulae to her right, flower samples to her left, a clear space in front of her. She threw her coat onto her and Twilight’s bed, a sure sign that she was about to attempt something that required her full attention.

Her work supplies lay on a little tray that sat on her lap. The try was the kind that one would serve a surprise breakfast in bed on. She’d have to work quietly, lest she wake the sleeping Princess Twilight to her right. Her… Well, Brazen wasn’t sure what Twilight was to her yet. They certainly weren’t dating, though Twilight thought so. That was the entire point of their little sham, after all.

Brazen inspected each sample carefully, recording every detail of the plant that she could; its weight, its pliability, even its taste, in certain instances. When she thought she was ready, she slipped her hand in Twilight’s bra and withdrew a small glass vial containing a single, shriveled, cracked seed.

Brazen popped open the vial and tapped the seed onto her workspace. She pressed her palms together, then slowly began to force her life energy outwards. Her eye began to glow a ghastly shade of green, which soon came to surround her horn and her hands. A small gust of wind poured in from all around her, carrying tiny whispers that she could never quite make out. The seed gained a similar green glow, and it rose a few inches into the air. Brazen jutted her right hand in the seed’s direction. With a sound reminiscent of a many inches-thick sheet of tin foil ripping, the seed began to tremble and sputter. Brazen snapped her fingers, bathing the entirety of the room with green light. When the light faded, a small green sprout had taken the seed’s place.

Brazen wiped the sweat from her brow with a satisfied sort of exhaustion. She lifted a pot of dirt from Twilight’s lap and placed it onto the tray. The seed soon found home in the depths of the soil, where it would remain for the rest of the process. Brazen snapped her fingers, which accelerated the growth of the sprout. Brazen watched with fascination as the sprout grew taller and stronger, eventually blooming into a flower, the petals so purple that it appeared black. She pinched the flower from the stem and held it in her hands.

“You did it, Z,” said Twilight, although it was hardly her voice coming from her mouth. “Too bad I won’t get to see it.”

“You will, Ivy. Just give me some time,” promised Brazen. She turned to Twilight, unconcerned by her sudden transformation. Her skin had shifted from purple to a dark, leafy green color. Her mane was no longer straight cut and long, but short and curly, not to mention it was now a rosy pink color. Her eyes were the most drastically different, turning to a piercing lime green. They were smaller than Twilight’s, and they had a more arrogant gleam to them. These were eyes that Brazen had spent several years worth of time staring into.

“That’s illegal,” noted Ivy.

“Not anymore. Necromancy on plants and simple creatures is totally cool now,” said Brazen. She presented the flower to Ivy. “Even if it was still against the law, that wouldn’t stop me. You know that.”

“You always were way too stubborn,” said Ivy, accepting the flower with a small smile. “Stubborn, arrogant, stupid. Three things I loved about you.”

“Love. Not loved. Don’t use past tense,” said Brazen. She blinked, and Ivy was suddenly Twilight once again.

“You need to accept that, Brazen. She’s in the past,” said Twilight. The flower in her hand began to brown and wilt, soon crumbling into nothing. “What flower is this, anyway?”

“They used to be called Forget-Me-Rots,” said Brazen. “Or Flicker Flowers. They could theoretically live forever if they remained in their soil. Once separated from a dirt source, they begin a sixty-second death timer. Been extinct for thousands of years. I was able to recover a sample from related plants.”

“Interesting. And you brought one back?”

“Ivy wants to see one.”

“Wanted, Brazen. Ivy wanted to see one,” said Twilight coldly. She closed her eyes tiredly, and let out a soft sigh. “She doesn’t anymore. You do understand, don’t you? She can’t see it and she can’t love you anymore.”

“She may not right now, but she will. I’ll make sure of that,” promised Brazen. Inexplicably, Twilight had vanished again, only to be replaced once again by Ivy.

“I can’t and I won’t. Do you really think I want you to do this?” she asked. “Especially like this?”

“You didn’t have enough time. You deserve a second chance,” said Brazen. Ivy cackled in a very unfamiliar way. It wasn’t teasing or good-natured, but dark and foreboding.

“You’re not doing this for her,” said Ivy, speaking with Twilight’s voice. “Who do you think you’re kidding with that? It’s pretty obvious that you’re doing this for yourself. You’re being selfish.”

“I’m selfish for risking prison for her? I could be arrested for this, and you’re calling me selfish?” scoffed Brazen. “Yeah, I guess I am kinda selfish.”

“That’s not what she meant, dummy. You’re hurting yourself,” said Ivy. She wrapped her arm around Brazen. “How many years has it been? When you fail, I’m afraid you might go off the edge.”

“I’m not going to fail. I’ve been working at this for five years, and you think I’m gonna flub now? Don’t make me laugh.”

“You don’t even know if it’s possible. What if it just can’t be done, Z?” asked Ivy. “What would you do if it turns out that it just cannot be accomplished? If it’s just not possible?”

Brazen pulled away from Ivy, sliding out of bed. She grabbed her coat, suddenly remembering that she was late for work. She didn’t say another word to Ivy as she slipped through their little hut of a home. She practically flew out of the house and, before she knew it, her hooves were pressed against the hot desert sand. Teleporting would’ve been much, much faster, seeing as she had about a two mile commute, but she wanted to get in at least a bit of a walk before she had to spend the day staring at corpses.

“Do you think she’d want this?” asked Twilight, matching Brazen’s stride on her right.

“What’re you going to do when it doesn’t work?” asked Ivy, walking to Brazen’s left.

“It has to,” said Brazen simply.


Brazen felt her body jerk, and she shot forward in her bed. She looked to her right, hoping for the impossible. She was unsurprised, but still a little disappointed, when she saw no one there. That dream… Something about that dream made Brazen want to vomit. She was drenched in a cold sweat that she didn’t really understand. The dream wasn’t altogether scary, but something about it made Brazen feel like she was going to die.

“Damn you, Luna,” she whispered to no one. She let out a sigh, then rolled out of bed. She took a quick cold shower, brewed herself some coffee, and grabbed her coat. She threw it over herself, and, after checking to make sure that her diary, ring, and train ticket were all in her pocket, she set out for the station. She withdrew her diary and summoned a pen, and shakily started to write.

Dear Diary,

I had a strange dream last night. I was in bed with Twilight when I finally brought back a Forget-Me-Rot. I gave it to Twilight, who turned to Ivy. The two of them switched places throughout the dream, asking me if Ivy would’ve wanted this,and what I would do if it didn’t work. I guess this is my way of convincing myself that this is a bad idea.

It has to work, it just has to. It’s been three goddamn years, and I refuse for it to all be for nothing. If I can’t do it, I’ll just keep trying and trying until I can. Would Ivy want this? That’s tough to answer. I just have to bring her back, if just to apologize. She died hating me. That hurt me more than anything else could.

I have to make things right.

A Walk in the Park

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The weeks following what would be dubbed “The Dinner” weren’t easy, for Twilight nor Rarity. Regardless of how much Twilight swore it wasn’t Rarity’s fault and that she was getting over it, the alabaster unicorn couldn’t help but feel a monumental amount of guilt. In her eyes, she had ruined a family. And, if the first twelve days after The Dinner were any indication, it would all be for nothing.

Similar to Rarity’s unwilling and irreversible guilt was Twilight’s bitterness. Though not directed at her girlfriend, Rarity did receive the brunt of the alicorn princess’ “blue period”. Twilight Sparkle was very antisocial by nature, and she reverted back to her old hermit tendencies. The two stopped spending as much time together, with Twilight always busying herself in that secret laboratory of hers. The last willing hug and kiss that Rarity had gotten out of Twilight was on the night of The Dinner. Their friends noticed, of course, and began to prepare themselves for the worst, the news that nobody wanted and everyone secretly feared.

Then, exactly nineteen days after The Dinner, Twilight decided to go for a walk with her beloved Rarity. Rarity was in her Boutique, working on one of her side projects to keep herself busy, when she heard a knock at the door. She rushed from her workshop and to the front door, ripping it open in a frenzy.

“Hi,” said Twilight plainly.

“H-hello,” returned Rarity. “It’s good to see you again.”

“Same to you. Listen, I think we should talk,” said Twilight, planting a huge rock of panic in the insecure Rarity. “Things have been… Things have been different between us, I think is the best way to say it. I’m sorry for that.”

“Of course you are, darling, but don’t be,” said Rarity, tugging at her hair nervously. “It’s not your fault. If anything, it’s mine. I just want you to know that I-”

“Let’s go for a walk, shall we?” suggested Twilight. “Get some fresh air, so I can clear my head.”

Rarity wasn’t too affected by the rudeness of her love. She was mostly just excited to be talking to her again. Part of Rarity, a ridiculous asinine part of her truly believed that Twilight intended never to speak to her again. Just being in the princess’ presence felt like a resuscitation of sorts.

“Whatever you need, darling. Just let me fetch a jacket.”

Rarity hovered a purple jacket from her closet and was out the door before she had it halfway on her body. The two walked side-by-side, neither daring to break the silence for several minutes. Rarity looked Twilight up and down, assessing her physical and mental state. The last time she had seen Twilight was three days ago, and she had been wearing the same lavender sweater and pink skirt. Her hair was fairly messy, messier than she normally allowed it to get. Rarity couldn’t be positive from her small glance, but it seemed to her that Twilight’s wings were more bare than usual. The Princess of Friendship was… molting.

The two remained in silence for ten minutes, one out of nerves and the other out of preoccupation. It wasn’t until they took a turn into Ponyville Public Park did Rarity decide it was time to break the silence.

“I’ve missed you,” said Rarity as they strolled down the path of the calm, near-empty park. “I feel like Sweetie Belle has seen you more than I have in the past few weeks.”

“I’ve been in the lab most of the time, so she’s only really been seeing Spike,” said Twilight. “I sorta wish he didn’t get along with Sweetie so much. I could really have used his company.”

“I tried to visit you, but you seemed…” Rarity struggled to find the right word.

“Angry? Bitter? Resentful?”

“I was going to say ‘distracted’, but those are all fairly accurate,” said Rarity. Twilight sort of shrugged, but didn’t say anything to argue her point.

“Yeah. All four of those are perfect adjectives for me right now,” said Twilight. “I can only imagine how you must be feeling. My dad… Night Light… He was completely out of line. I know you said that you don’t care, but I can’t let it go. It might not bother you, but it infuriates me. Part of the reason I’ve been so sparse lately is that I’ve been so angry, I was afraid I’d lash out at you.”

“Darling, you truly needn’t worry,” promised Rarity, planting her hand on Twilight’s shoulder. “I know that it can’t be easy for you. I’d be terrified if you weren’t angry after what you’ve been through.”

“We. What we’ve been through.”

Silence was resurrected for a spell, this one slightly more comfortable than the last. Twilight took in a deep breath, breathing in the cool spring air. She wrapped her arm around Rarity and pulled her closer, intertwining her fingers with Rarity’s.

“I don’t want to lose you,” whispered Twilight. “Least of all because I can’t deal with my daddy issues.”

“I’m in this for the long run, love,” promised Rarity. “Daddy issues or no, I intend to remain for as long as you let me. Just promise me that you won’t shut me out like this again. I need you to talk to me, and you need to talk to someone.”

Twilight didn’t quite know what to say, which was a strange and uncomfortable feeling to her. She was unsure and confused, but it didn’t feel like the end of the world, like Twilight thought it should. Something about the confidence in Rarity’s voice, the assurance that she would be there, coupled with her shining blue eyes that twinkled with a determined sort of passion, all came together to not only relax Twilight, but put her near tears.

“I… I don’t know what I’d do without you,” choked Twilight. Rarity stretched to the tip of her hoof and planted a soft kiss on her forehead.

“I hope you’ll never have to find out, darling,” said Rarity. “I love you more than anything, and I hope you understand that. If a virus that should have killed you couldn’t keep us apart, nothing will be able to.”

“Rarity… Once again, when I felt like I was going to die, you brought me right back to life,” said Twilight, giving her love a watery smile. “Come on. Let’s go home.”

That day, that walk in the park, was the last time Twilight ever worried about losing Rarity. Despite her natural paranoia and distrust of things she didn’t understand (and, to say that Twilight Sparkle didn’t understand love would be a bit of an understatement), she was confident that Rarity would sooner die than leave her alone.

Twilight smiled, wrapped her wing around Rarity’s shoulder, and the two walked home, hand-in-hand. Twilight was never one for the outdoors, but she knew that she needed this walk, if for nothing else than the fresh air and the excuse to snuggle and show off her girlfriend in public.

Can You Smell What Twilight Is Cooking?

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Twilight stared up at the ceiling, her hands folded behind her head. She felt as if she was sinking into the soft cushion of her bed, drowning in the softness, and she was terribly missing the warmth of Rarity beside her. Rarity was away to search for real estate to open a second Boutique in Canterlot, and she’d be away for the next few days. On night one, Twilight was already aching for her. Twilight had considered begging her to stay, but soon realized how petty and selfish that was of her. Twilight let out a sigh, then rolled over to her side in an attempt at sleep.

She then found herself to be nose to nose with Pinkie Pie, who was crouching besides Twilight’s bed.

“Hiya!” said Pinkie. Twilight screamed loudly, lit up her horn, and panickedly teleported downstairs to her living room, accidentally landing in the arms of another mare, Rainbow Dash.

“Sup,” said RD. Twilight leapt out of Rainbow’s grasp and lit up her horn again. Twilight was so confused, she was ready to start launching stun spells in an attempt to subdue the apparent intruder. Then, she noted how casually her “intruder” was dressed, and how unbothered she seemed by being caught. Dash was wearing a red tanktop that left a bit of her midriff exposed, and a pair of cyan boy shorts. Rainbow Dash’s favorite sleepwear. Coupled with the fact that she was sitting lazily in the large crystal throne marked with her Cutie Mark, it was clear to Twilight that she was panicking over nothing.

“What are you doing here?!” demanded Twilight. “I thought you all left hours ago!”

“Not me. I just woke up, actually,” said Dash, scratching her hand through her short, rainbow mane. “What time is it?”

“Three-thirty in the morning!”

“Oh. Well, sorry I spooked ya. I’m bout to head out for a drink, you coming?” asked Dash. The angry glare that Twilight gave her supplied more than enough answer. “Alright, whatever floats your boat. What’re you doing up, anyway?” Twilight calmed herself slightly, finally coming down out of Panic Mode.

“I couldn’t sleep. I know she hasn’t even been gone a day yet, but I really miss Rarity,” sighed Twilight. Twilight walked a few feet to the left and deposited herself into her tall crystal chair. “I feel like I take her for granted. I never knew I’d miss her as much as I did, so quickly.”

“Oooh, I get it!” chuckled Rainbow slyly. “Ah, you’re missing your ‘late night session’ with the Missus, huh?”

Twilight almost never thought about sex, not because she didn’t find Rarity to be attractive or that she didn’t want to, eventually, have sex with her. It’s just that she didn’t find it as important as, say, her dear pervy friend Rainbow Dash. She thought about sex so little that it took her a solid thirty seconds to put together what Rainbow even meant.

“Oh my god, no! Honestly, Rainbow,” said Twilight, a slight blush blooming on her face. “That’s not what I meant at all. I just wished she was in bed with me.” Rainbow snickered. “Both of us wearing clothes, and just hugging, snuggling, and maybe a little kissing. We never… We’re not going to… We plan to… Why am I explaining myself to you? My sex life-”

“Or lack of one.”

“Is none of your business, Rainbow Dash,” said Twilight with a small smile. “Sex isn’t that important in a relationship. Something you’d know if you were ever actually in a serious one.”

“Wow, you’re getting fiery, aren’t ya, your highness?” laughed Rainbow Dash. The Twilight she met five years ago would never say something that could even be interpreted as a friendly jab. It was amazing how much having actual friends could change a person. “Alright, Ms. Relationship Specialist. How serious is your relationship?”

“Serious enough, I think,” said Twilight with a slight air of self-confidence. “Serious enough that I’m pining after a few hours apart.”

“Wanna talk about it?” asked Rainbow Dash. “Maybe you just need to get some stuff off your mind, so you can sleep.”

Twilight was not expecting that. Scorn? Perhaps. Comments on how Twilight took everything too seriously? Likely. An off-color, immature joke about the possible sexual tension between Twilight and Rarity that was in offensively bad taste? Almost definitely. But actually offering an ear to listen, to talk about the issue and actually trying to help? That was a move that was mature to a shocking extent coming from Rainbow Dash.

“Actually, I would,” said Twilight. She really appreciated the offer, and hoped that it would maybe help her sleep. “I just really feel like she doesn’t know how much I appreciate her. I mean, just last week, I completely ignored her for something that wasn’t even her fault.”

“Which is typical girlfriend behavior, by the way,” said Rainbow Dash. Twilight gave her a look that could kill a mare with weak enough spirit, bringing a small grin to Rainbow’s face. “I’m just saying, it’s not weird. I’ve lost many a hot guy to that little move, so it’s probably a good thing that you hate yourself for doing it.” Ignoring that, Twilight decided to move forward.

“She’s always doing such nice things for me. She treats me like a princess,” said Twilight. Before Rainbow could open her mouth, she continued with, “I know that I am actually a princess, but she really pampers me like I am one. She reads with me every night, and she tries really hard to...uh… I don’t want to sound like a jerk…”

“She can keep up with your massive intellect, I get it,” said Rainbow. “That’s really sweet of her. I know as well as anybody that reading you is a pain in the ass.” She saw the angry look on Twilight’s face, which provided her with the amusement she was looking for. “Kidding, kidding. Still, I get why you appreciate that so much. Must be nice to connect with someone over something you obsess over.”

“It’s awesome. Besides just giving me something to talk about, she really makes me feel… pretty,” said Twilight. “Wanted. Some days, she’ll just show up with a new dress or pair of shoes for me, that she made on a whim, just for me. Every time, she shows me the most beautiful piece of clothing I’ve ever seen. I asked her why she did it one time, and she said that she wanted to make something as beautiful as me, but every time she sees me, she swears that she’ll never be able to, because nothing will be able to compare to my beauty.”

“Wow,” said Rainbow Dash, barely choking back her laughter. “That is literally the cheesiest thing I have ever heard in my entire life. No wonder you’re head-over-hooves for her; She’s just as corny as you are.”

“I know it’s corny, but you can’t say that’s not also the most romantic thing you’ve ever heard,” said Twilight, almost defensively. RD couldn’t much argue with that. “I wish I could… I dunno, pay her back. Make her feel as loved as she does to me. Reciprocate.” Rainbow Dash snickered immaturely, which Twilight couldn’t care to try to decypher the reason why.

“Alright, alright, you wanna make your gal feel special?” asked Dash rhetorically. “Here’s what you do. You head down to the liquor store, pick up some booze, and, when she gets back, you send Spike over to have a sleepover with Sweetie Belle someplace, you take Rares upstairs. You two get plastered, lock the doors, and… Ahem… Stay in bed…For a couple of days.”

“I’m not getting her drunk for sex, Rainbow.”

“It wouldn’t be getting her drunk for sex! It’d be getting her drunk and then sex!” explained RD. If looks could kill, Twilight would’ve gone to prison for homicide. “That’s what I’d like from my fella, anyway. Just a suggestion.”

“I have an idea!” said Pinkie loudly. A large amount of screaming and swearing ensued, and Pinkie just barely avoided a hot blast of magic to the face. Pinkie, who was clearly undisturbed by her friends’ shock, had suddenly and inexplicably found her way in between the two thrones, entirely without being detected.

“Christ on a crutch, Pinkie Pie!” shrieked RD, clutching her chest. “You gave me a freaking heart attack!”

“I have an idea for what you can do for Rare-bear!” said Pinkie excitedly. “It’ll be awesome, and it won’t fail to make her appreciate you more than anything in the whole wide universe! Wanna hear?”

“Sure, I’m open to suggestions,” said Twilight.

“Alright, so Rarity is out of town until Monday,” said Pinkie. “An hour before she gets here, we arrange a little accident for you. We’ll say you got run over, and she comes to see you in the hospital, right? Ooh, but we pay off a doctor, and he says to her ‘I’m sorry, ma’am, your girlfriend is in a coma, and she’ll never wake up, probably’ and she’s crying and all like ‘No! Twily, I love you so much, why wasn’t I here to protect you, why?!’, and then we’re all crying with her, except me and Dash, cause we’re in on it!”

“Pinkie?”

“But you’re not actually in a coma, you’re really just pretending, and you pretend for a couple of years, at least a decade!” continued Pinkie. “Then, when you ‘wake up’, and you’ll be all like ‘Oh my god, I don’t remember anything, the accident gave me amnesia, I have to relearn every aspect of my life’, and then you start dating Rarity again, and just before you tell her you love her for the first time, you pretend to remember her, and you tell her that you thought of her all the time when you were asleep, and then it’ll be like you two fell in love all over again, even though it was all made up!”

Silence reigned supreme for several minutes as Twilight and Rainbow silently debated whether or not to have Pinkie Pie admitted to the nearest mental institution. Pinkie just sat with a mad grin on her face, waiting for the inevitable declaration of “You’re a genius, Pinkie Pie!” She’d brush it off, claiming it was no big deal, and then they’d add ‘humble’ and ‘drop-dead gorgeous’ to the list of adjectives.

“You know, in hindsight,” said Rainbow Dash, scratching her head. “It was probably a bad idea to ask me and Pinkie about this sort of thing. Maybe ask the two members of the group who actually have been in a legit relationship.”

“I’m going to bed now,” sighed Twilight. “If you guys are going to stay, help yourselves to the one of the guest rooms. If not, and I do mean this in the most polite way possible, please get out of my house.”

Rainbow Dash decided to recline in her chair and fall asleep right there, while Pinkie seemingly vanished. Twilight was beyond tired by this point, and she decided that she wanted nothing more right now than to collapse into her bed so that, in the morning, she could ask her older, wiser friends for advice.


Of course. It was so obvious, Twilight was a little upset that it took her asking Applejack to come to this solution. Rarity was the type of mare to put out an outer shell of elegance and grace, but still had certain desires and sensibilities that were more down-to-earth. One of these sensibilities was a love of food.

“Tha way ta any man’s heart is through their stomach,” Applejack had said. “Yer lady is tha same way, believe it or not.”

Since Twilight had undergone her alicorn transformation, Rarity was easily the thinnest of the six. Unlike Applejack and Rainbow Dash, Rarity was thin rather than toned, and relatively short (the shortest of the group, though most of them were taller than average). Rarity had never worked out a day in her life, unless you counted the two days she decided to try Zumba. In short, Rarity was a tiny mare by all accounts.

But, if she somehow wasn’t worried about making a fool of herself in front of others, she could out-eat Big Macintosh. When she had first started sleeping in the castle, and Spike had begun dabbling in the kitchen, he was alarmed and a bit impressed by the way that she was able to suck down the various plates her put in front of her.

Spicy food, savory food, sweet, crispy, chewy, Asian, Italian, Spanish, Greek, anything that went on a plate, dish, bowl, and the occasional skewer, Rarity just loved. Even, and often especially, food that wasn’t necessarily good for her, she devoured it all.

Twilight had thought up a list of all of Rarity’s favorite dishes, gathered Spike’s cookbooks, and set off to prepare the most amazing, perfect, beautiful dinner for the most amazing, perfect, beautiful mare that Twilight had ever seen. Twilight looked over her recipes one more time, then set off to work.


Rarity reached into the front pouch of her suitcase and pulled out her keys. She was tired, disappointed, and starving, among other things, and couldn’t wait to see her girlfriend before popping out for a bite to eat. Rarity fumbled with her keys for a second, then pushed open the grand doors of the Crystal Castle that she occasionally called “home”.

Rarity dragged her suitcase down the glistening halls, trying and failing to stifle a yawn. She made her way to the kitchen, where she thought she smelled something cooking. A small smile spread on her face; Twilight must’ve tried her hand in the kitchen. It was a sweet gesture, one that was not lost on Rarity. She was curious as to who had helped Twilight, because, to her knowledge, Twilight’s culinary prowess started and ended with heating up a microwave pizza. The closer she got to the kitchen, however, to more Rarity thought that Twilight had probably tried to teach herself; The smell of smoke was heavy in the air, stinging Rarity’s nose slightly. Still, she was curious as to see what Twilight had attempted at. It was the thought that counts, right?

Rarity parked her suitcase just outside the kitchen before stepping into the warzone that the normally neat and tidy room had become. The sink was filled with about every single pot or pan that was in the castle. Those vessels that weren’t dirty were currently boiling over on the stove, which was a fiasco in of itself. Sauces, grease drippings, scorch marks, anything you could imagine in a dirty kitchen. Twilight herself was a flustered, frazzled mess, her mane tangled, her apron covered in flour, grease, and some sort of meat blood. She ran around the kitchen like a headless chicken, trying to salvage her mess.

“I just can’t leave you alone, can I?” said Rarity, grinning slightly. Twilight stopped in her tracks, turned to see Rarity, and stared for a few seconds. Then, she ran over and scooped her up in a massive hug, pecking her face with kisses as she did.

“Oh my god, I missed you so much!” squealed Twilight. “I felt like you’d never come back, oh, I’ve missed you so, so, so much!”

“I’ve missed you, too, darling. It’s great to be back home,” laughed Rarity, looking around at the mess. “Someone made a mess, eh?” Twilight blushed in slight embarrassment and lowered Rarity back to the floor.

“I tried to cook you dinner,” she said sheepishly. “I wanted to give you the best meal I could possibly give you without Spike’s help. It took me a few tries, but I finally got something.” Rarity was equal parts amused and curious. Twilight really was cute, especially when she wasn’t trying to be.

“Alright, love. Show me what you’ve got.”

Twilight reached into her pocket, pulled out a slip of paper, and handed it to Rarity, who peered at it in confusion.. The note had a series of digits on it, which appeared to be three different phone numbers.

“I can’t cook, but I can order take-out,” said Twilight with a nervous smile. Rarity smiled in kind and draped her arms around Twilight’s neck. She didn’t care what she ate, so long as she did so with Twilight. There was one thing that was bothering her, though.

“You’re a genius. How can you not know how to cook?”

Curse of Endearment

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Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was being uncharacteristically smug, and her husband most certainly noticed. She constantly had this knowing grin on her face, and she would sometimes look at Shining and laugh because, apparently, he wasn’t in on the joke. He waited all day for a moment alone with the princess, but, whether due to bad luck or Cadence’s earlier meddling, the two were seldom alone for more than ten seconds. It wasn’t until four, when they were awaiting a meeting with Fancy Pants and his wife, did Shining find the time to talk to Cadence.

The two were in the Crystal Empire’s throne room, which was, in essence, a long, tall hallway. There must’ve been twenty windows carved into either wall, from the door to the throne. Sitting in the tall crystal throne, wearing a soft pink silk dress that was far too expensive for her taste, was Princess Mi Amore Cadenza herself. To the right of the grinning princess was her husband and head guard, Shining Armor. As the day was dying down, Shining Armor had traded his normal purple armor for a pair of work jeans and a short-sleeved black t-shirt (though he did still have his sword attached to his belt). This was done partly for Shining’s own comfort, and partly because Cadence had made an offhanded comment about wanting to see the results of Shining’s workout regiment more often.

Cadence looked at her husband, admiring his physique for a bit. When she had first met Shining, she only really saw your typical brutish jarhead. She never expected a funny, sensitive, intelligent man to become the head of the guard, especially as quickly as he did, nor did she think that she’d end up marrying him. Life, and love, was funny in that way. Even the Princess of Love could miss things.

But she hadn’t missed this, which is why she was currently snickering in Shining Armor’s general direction.

“Alright, seriously, what’s so funny?” asked Shining, crossing his arms. “You’ve been chuckling all day. I’m starting to think you’re laughing at me.”

“Oh, yeah, I sure am,” snickered Cadence. “Because I noticed first, which means I win the bet!”

Shining Armor was a very competitive man. This was relatively well-advertised. What was more of a secret, however, was that Princess Cadence was just as competitive, if not more. In the past month alone, they had manufactured several bets, wagers, and contests over normal, everyday household tasks. Shining Armor had no clue which one she was referring to.

“The bet?” asked Shining normally. Oh no. What could he have possibly agreed to?

“Coupons,” said Cadence plainly. It all came back to the guard; A few months ago, Cadence and Shining had made a bet about Twilight, and when (if ever) she’d start pursuing love. Shining Armor was positive that Twilight would willingly remain single until around age 30, give or take a year. Cadence, however, was positive that she’d find someone that very year. The stakes were relationship coupons (free hoofrubs, dishes duty, etc.) for every month off the mark the loser was. In short, Cadence had a lot of coupons to redeem.

“Really?” asked Shining excitedly. He didn’t even care that he lost; He was so happy for his sister. “Who? I can’t believe she hasn’t told me yet! This must be payback for the wedding… But who is it?!”

“Guess,” said Cadence, feeling Shining’s excitement infect her. She loved Twilight just as much as Shining did, so she was ecstatic to see her happy with someone.

“Hm… If Big Mac wasn’t in the picture, I’d assume Cheerilee…” said Shining, tapping his chin in thought. “Hm… There’s Minuette… Lyra, assuming the rumors aren’t true about her and Bon-Bon… Wait a sec! Is she dating one of the girls?”

“Yup.”

“Oh, this is easy! Not Rainbow, she’d drive Twilight nuts. And she’s surprisingly straight. Not Pinkie, either,” listed Shining. “I doubt that Twilight could get into a real relationship with her… Not Aj, so… Fluttershy or Rarity?” He thought on it, considering one against the other. “Rarity!”

“You got it! I’m so happy for them!” squealed Cadence. “Oh, this is a good one, too! I can feel it! They’re going to end up married, I just know it!” That caught Shining’s attention. For some reason, he found that to scare him slightly and offend him a bit more.

“Wow, that serious, huh?” asked Shining. “Kinda wish she would’ve told me earlier. Or, you know, at all.”

“You should talk,” scoffed Cadence. “Mr. ‘Sorry For Not Telling You I Was Getting Married Until The Day Of The Wedding But Please Be My Best Mare’.”

“Fair enough. How long has it been?

“Couple of months. They’re going really steady, and they’re so cute together!” squealed Cadence. “Oh, they’re so serious, I’m waiting for the wedding invite any day now!”

Shining Armor thought about it and, after careful consideration, decided Twilight could’ve done way worse. Not that he, as a married man, was entertaining the idea that any other mare was even close to as attractive as his wife, but he could certainly see what his sister did. Not bad, Twily. Not bad at all.

“So, what’s their relationship like?” asked Shining. “Am I allowed to ask that? Or does that cross some sort of ‘Love Goddess’ line?”

“They are just the cutest couple. They spend so much time together,” said Cadence dreamily. “Like we did on our honeymoon.”

“I hope you’re exaggerating. I don’t think I want my sister doing any of the things we did on our honeymoon.” Cadence chuckled slightly, though she had to agree with Shining Armor on that.

“They practically live together, but it hasn’t messed with their friendship with each other or the girls,” continued Cadence. “Shining, they’re saving themselves! Isn’t that just adorable?”

“I can’t see Rarity lasting too long with that,” said Shining. “How is she holding up? I doubt she was prepared for something like this.”

“Well, Big Brother of Little Faith, your sister and her girlfriend,” Cadence stretched the word “girlfriend”, because she loved to say it. “Are doing pretty well. Lasted longer than we did. They’re staying strong. I mean, they kiss and cuddle and what have you, but nothing too lewd. Plus, they haven’t had to resort to the Potato Method, so that’s a good sign.”

“Potato Method?”

“Sometimes, couples who want to stay abstinent will bite into a raw potato to get themselves out of the mood,” explained Cadence. Shining Armor was suddenly possessed by the image of his little sister in a thin robe, hovering over Rarity and biting into a raw spud. It was vaguely disturbing and also kind of funny.

“I was thinking something way more lewd,” said Shining.

“You pervert,” snickered Cadance, rolling her eyes. “Honestly, how are we ever going to have children if you always have your mind in the gutter?”

“There are some steps we’d have to take to get to the whole children phase,” said Shining. “Maybe we could get started?”

Cadence looked very confused for a bit. Shining couldn’t possibly be… Cadence knew he was, but it was so sudden. And they were working. Shining was always a rather professional guy, and he would never normally even suggest such a thing until after the day had fully ended.

“Are you… Are you trying to pick me up?” asked Cadence.

“On the job? Of course not!” Shining grinned. “Is it working?”

“You are not flirting with me on the clock,” said Cadence, though she was far from upset.

“It’s not my fault that you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” said Shining, leaning over and kissing Cadence on the cheek. “I can’t help myself. When I’m around you… I just lose it.”

“We’re working. I’m working,” said Cadence, though more to convince herself than her husband. “As much as I’d love to run off to the bedroom with you, we can’t. Fancy and Fleur should be here any minute.” Shining kissed her again, then a third time.

“They’re late. We don’t even know if they’re still coming,” said Shining. “Come on, baby. Just a quickie.”

Cadence bit down on her lower lip thoughtfully. She couldn’t, not until after her meeting. It was unprofessional, and, as the Princess of the Crystal Empire, she couldn’t just leave her post to shag her husband.

But damn, was that workout regiment something.

“Alright, really quick,” said Cadence. She grabbed her husband by the face and kissed him, running her hands down his biceps. Shining Armor scooped her up and carried her to the nearest private area (a large closet, in this case).

What neither of them realized while doing the deed is that a massive wave of powerful magic burst from their horns, spreading out across the Empire, Canterlot, even reaching Ponyville and Twilight’s castle. Very few people noticed or were affected. Rarity was one of the people who were most certainly affected, and in a way that neither she nor Twilight would forget for a long while.

It involved a length of rope, some handcuffs, and a 24-hour purge of all signs of affection.


Dear god, was this movie terrible. Twilight was offended that she had willingly played it on her TV, on Rarity’s request. The movie was atrocious, and, as Twilight read the book for research purposes, she could vouch that there was no version of this story that was any good. It hurt her to continue watching it.

But she did. And she’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy it.

“So, what exactly does she see in him?” asked Twilight. They were currently laid out on Twilight’s bed, with Rarity resting her head on Twilight’s chest. Late night snuggle/movie sessions were becoming a common occurrence, where they’d alternate picking movies both old and new, the two would curl up together in their warm, soft bed, and look up at Twilight’s large flat screen until they fell asleep in each other’s arms. The subject for view tonight: a fairly recent romance involving an awkward college girl who has fallen in love with a multi-millionaire who had some… dark fantasies.

“Well, they want you to believe that she can see through the darkness and… Creepy fetishes,” said Rarity. “But I am more inclined to believe that it’s about his money. He’s loaded.”

Twilight nodded in understanding, fascinated by the devotion of the movie’s protagonist. It was shocking, and a bit disturbing. In many scenes, it seemed like she had sold away her freedom. Twilight loved Rarity very, very much, but if Rarity asked her to do some of the things that the millionaire asked, she might start to question their relationship.

“Why’d you want to watch this again?” asked Twilight, running her hand through Rarity’s hair.

“I heard it was awful, and I was grimly curious,” admitted Rarity. “So far, it’s about as terrible as I expected.”

“At least it’s not as explicit as the book.”

“Oh, and that’s an upside?” asked Rarity. Twilight thought that was a fairly odd thing for Rarity to say. Rarity was never an especially provocative person, even in the private company of her girlfriend. If Twilight were to guess based entirely on her interactions with Rarity, she’d guess that Rarity had never been told what sex was or how it worked.

Then, things started to head south, both figuratively and literally. Soon, Twilight was the only one watching the movie. Rarity had become much more invested in her makeshift pillow to worry about what was on the screen. She had been resting her head on Twilight’s chest for near an hour, but she just now seemed to notice. Something came over her, and she felt an odd, irresistible urge to squeeze Twilight’s boob.

So she did.

“Hey! Whoa, someone’s grabby tonight,” said Twilight nervously. “Uh… I’d appreciate it if you didn’t do that again.”

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry,” said Rarity, genuinely sorry and confused. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“Rares?” said Twilight uncomfortably. “You’re hand is heading into the Danger Zone.”

Rarity yanked her hand away from Twilight’s crotch, confused as to how it got there in the first place. Twilight was understandably uncomfortable, but unaware of what to do about it. She had expected Rarity to ask or talk about some sort of sexual act at some point in their relationship, but she didn’t expect it to be so sudden, rash, or on a movie night.

“I’m sorry!” said Rarity, though she hardly seemed to notice that she was also planting kisses on Twilight’s neck and running her hands down her thigh. “Something feels… different.” She sat up suddenly, then threw her leg over Twilight’s body, essentially sitting on her stomach. “Twilight… I know we said we wanted to wait, but…I think I’m ready.”

“Well, I’m not,” said Twilight, squirming beneath Rarity’s weight. “Rarity, you need to get off me.”

“I love you so much,” whispered Rarity. She didn’t seem to hear Twilight. “Don’t you love me? Let me prove my love for you.”

“Rarity, please stop. This isn’t right, and you know it.”

“Please, Twilight, I love you so much,” said Rarity, kissing Twilight’s cheek, her lips, her chest. “I love you so, so much.”

Twilight had two choices in that moment. She could either fold, bend her will to appease her girlfriend. Throw away all of her beliefs and ideals just to make Rarity happy. Or, she could remain strong, and reaffirm herself and her stance. Stand by her morals, and remain strong.

She chose the latter.

“Rarity, I’m going to count down from three,” warned Twilight. “When I get to zero, I’m going to push you off, and we’re going to talk about what’s happening here, okay? 3.”

“I love you so much, Twilight.” Rarity planted a kiss down on Twilight’s belly, running her hand along Twilight’s side.

“2.”

“Come on, love, let me prove it, please.” Her hand found itself on Twilight’s rear, and she squeezed firmly.

“And 1. Okay, that’s enough,” said Twilight. She lit up her horn and grasped Rarity with a levitation spell. She raised Rarity off of her, holding her a few feet above the bed. Then, as if possessed, Rarity started kicking, thrashing, uttering near-animalistic growls.

This was officially weird.

“Rarity, what in Tartarus has gotten into you?” asked Twilight.

LOVE ME!” bellowed Rarity, in a deep, angry, almost demonic voice. She lit up her own horn and dispelled Twilight’s magic with a blast of her own. The princess reacted quickly, rolling from out of the way, falling onto the floor. She reached under her bed in search of something to restrain Rarity and, oddly enough, found a length of rope. Deciding there was no time to question it, she grabbed it and used her horn to wrap it around Rarity, pinning her arms to her side. Twilight quickly flitted through her mental recollection of the Big Book of Knots, then used her remembered knowledge to tie a tight knot at Rarity’s back. Twilight rose to her hooves and inspected her still-thrashing girlfriend, trying to figure what was going on. She swore that she would not leave until she got to the bottom of this.

Then her doorbell rang. With a groan, Twilight fired up her horn and teleported down to the front door. Who could possibly be ringing her door at this time of night. She’d just tell the unwanted visitor, as politely as she could, leave her property. She opened the door and, before she could even open her mouth, Cadence was in her house and rambling incomprehensibly.

“Cadence? What are you doing here?” asked Twilight. She took in her sister-in-law, who was in a strange state of disarray. Her mane was a mess, rustled and tangled, almost like bedhead. She was wearing a pink dress that was torn at the hem in several places. Arguably the most scary aspect of her appearance was the shaking of her limbs and the slight sheen of sweat clinging to her body. Also, for some strange reason, she had a pair of steel handcuffs in her right hand.

“Twilight, I made a huge mistake,” said Cadence. “Have you noticed anything odd about you or Rarity lately? In the past couple of hours?”

“How’d you know?” asked Twilight.

“Twilight, I need to see her, right now. It’s very important that I check to make sure she’s okay.”

Twilight nodded, despite not really understanding the situation. She escorted Cadence up the stairs and down the hall to her bedroom. Twilight opened the door carefully, trying not to disturb Rarity.

“Twilight, darling, please let me go,” whined Rarity. “Please? Pretty please with a cherry on top? Just show me you love me, please,”

“Oh no,” sighed Cadence. She handed the cuffs to Twilight. “Slap those on her. You can never be too careful.”

“What’s happening?” asked Twilight, hovering the cuffs over and sliding and locking them onto Rarity’s wrist. “It’s like she’s possessed.”

“Cursed,” corrected Cadence. “By me, actually. I lost control of my magic, and it had some adverse effects on certain people. Rarity is one of them.”

“You lost control of your magic?” asked Twilight in confusion. “How? I wasn’t aware that was possible for an alicorn.”

Cadence blushed uncomfortably. She really, really, really didn’t want to have this conversation, with her sister-in-law or anyone. Still, it was one of her duties as Princess of Love.

“Twilight, when is a person’s magic at its weakest?” asked Cadence. Twilight, ever the good student, instantly went into School Mode, and had an answer within a few seconds.

“Well, besides death, a unicorn’s magic is really weak during childbirth,” listed Twilight. “Also, during times of extreme stress and emotional trauma.” Twilight thought on it. “You… You weren’t fighting with Shiny, were you?”

“Not quite. There’s one other time.” Cadence’s blush intensified. Twilight noticed, but couldn’t make heads or tails of it.

“Um… That’s all I can recall,” reported Twilight. Then, her eyes lit up and she remembered. “Oh, and also, for females, at the point of or-... Oh.”

“Yup.” The two couldn’t look at each other, Twilight looking up and Cadence looking down. The both of them were absolutely mortified.

“Of course,” said Twilight. “Uh… With who?” Cadence looked at her with a raised eyebrow, making Twilight realize what a dumb question that was. “Right. Sorry, that was inappropriate of me to ask, and it was pretty stupid.”

The two blushed brightly, both of them managing to ignore the moaning, groaning, whining, pining, cursed woman tied and cuffed on the bed.

“So…” asked Twilight. “How long does it last?”

“Twilight!”

“The curse! Oh god, the curse, not my brother!” Twilight slammed her palm to her forehead.

“Twenty-four hours, but it is very important that you do not show her any affection,” warned Cadence. “This is a Curse of Endearment. For the next twenty-four hours, you are not to hug her, kiss her, snuggle her, cuddle her, stroke her hair, say anything romantic, and under no circumstances are you to have sex with her.”

“What would happen if I did?” Twilight asked nervously. Cadence was being very panicked and very dire, which did not help Twilight feel anymore at ease with the situation.

“Any number of things. Varies from person to person. It could spread to infect you, or it could last forever. You cannot show her any signs of affection. For the next day, you have to pretend that you don’t love her.”

“How will I know when the curse breaks?”

“I enchanted the cuffs on my way here. They’ll restrain her hands and her magic, then fall off when it’s safe,” sighed Cadence. “I’m really sorry about all of this, but I have to go. I think the curse might’ve affected Auntie.”

Cadence wished Twilight good luck, then teleported away, leaving Twilight with a sob-shouting girlfriend on her bed that she couldn’t reassure or hug or make feel better in any way. This was going to be rough.

“Is she gone?” asked Rarity. “Great! Now you can let me go from these stupid handcuffs.”

“No, Rarity. You know that I can’t let you go,” said Twilight nervously. This was not how she imagined she’d be spending the night. Rarity thrashed suddenly, whining pathetically.

“T-twilight? Why don’t you love me?”

Twilight almost made a huge mistake. She was about to ruin everything with a single sentence, with no way to fix it. She thanked god for her ability to think quickly and managed to keep the words from spilling out.

“Oh, this is going to be difficult,” groaned Twilight.


Hour one led Twilight to believe that the entire scenario would be far easier to deal with than she thought. It wasn’t too complicated, really, all she had to do was ignore Rarity, and explain to her again that she couldn’t release her. It was irritating, but not altogether difficult.

Hour four was a bit tougher. It was during hour four that Twilight made the dire mistake of visiting the restroom. When she was in the bathroom, Rarity managed her way to her hooves, and repeatedly threw herself against the bathroom door.

“Twilight! Twilight!” she shouted. “Let me go, please! I love you, Twilight, please let me go!”

Twilight sighed, and lowered herself onto her bathroom floor. This was getting just a tiny bit old, and Twilight was getting fed up. She was tempted to look through a few books in search of a cure or counterspell, but disregarded it after a few moments of thought. She didn’t have many, if any, books on love magic, and, if there was a counterspell, Cadence would’ve made mention of it.

By hour twelve, the halfway point, Twilight was convinced that she had committed some sort of atrocity in a past life to deserve this sort of treatment. She thought she was a good enough friend, princess, and girlfriend. She didn’t deserve to have a cursed, shrieking banshee in her bedroom.

At hour nineteen, Twilight had forgotten who was supposed to be the prisoner. Rarity never stopped running into the door, nor did she stop screaming. There were quiet periods, sure, but it wasn’t nearly as extreme as the fits of shouting and begging for Twilight’s love and affection, like some sort of poorly-domesticated changeling.

Hour twenty-three, and Twilight felt as if she had just undergone some sort of mental torture. Rarity had long since stopped screaming in favor of the far more damaging repitition. For several straight hours, Rarity kept repeating the same phrase.

“I love you, Twilight? Why don’t you love me?”

Twilight hated how she was making Rarity feel. It felt wrong, evil, cruel, to deprive her of something she clearly needed. Twilight couldn’t even leave her bathroom, not from any physical barrier, but from the heavy, sludgy, grimy feeling in her chest. She knew it was the right thing to do. Sometimes, you had to do something hard to help someone you cared for, even if that thing seemed to hurt them. Twilight understood all that, but that didn’t make it much easier.

At the stroke of the magical twenty-fourth hour, Rarity felt a wave of clean energy flow over her. She raised her head from the floor sleepily, letting out an involuntary yawn. She stood up, shaking the handcuffs off her wrists and using her horn to untie the ropes restraining her. A slight ache radiated throughout her body, down to the bone. The curse had left some sort of residual magic that gave Rarity a horrible migraine. Above all else, she really had to pee.

Rarity opened the door to the bathroom, stepped over the fallen, sleeping form of Twilight, and made her way to the toilet. It was gross, and unladylike, but Rarity wasn’t too uncomfortable. She thought it was a sign of true love, to be able to inappropriately cop a feel, become cursed with an insatiable infatuation, and then pee with your girlfriend in the bathroom.

That, or the magic had severely addled her brain. Only time would tell.

A Year Past & Many More Coming

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Time has a tendency of sneaking up on you, especially when you lived in a place as magical and perpetually active as Equestria. While concerned with gods of chaos, magic-sucking goat demons, and love curses, it was hard to focus on how many days pass between them. Before you know it, it’s been a week, a month, a year.

Rarity never noticed how much time had passed since she began dating Twilight until she was out fetching the mail one day. She was just returning to the castle with a stack of envelopes when she caught sight of the date; February 17th, three days after Twilight had fallen ill and the two had technically started a romantic relationship, thus making it just past a year the two have been together. Rarity smiled as she entered the castle, wondering what they could do to celebrate.

“Hey, got anything good?” asked Twilight from the bed, as Rarity entered their room.

“Hm… A letter from Cadence, she seems to be wanting to visit,” listed Rarity, flipping through the letters. “Cheerilee, Sugar Belle from The Equal Village… I have a letter from my uncle, he’ll be wanting to meet you… A letter from Ni…. Naomi, my old friend from high school.” Twilight looked at her with disapproval, then held out her hand. “Oh, no, it’s not important. I’d better just throw this away.”

Twilight rolled her eyes, then levitated the letter out of Rarity’s grasp, much to her chagrin. Just as Twilight had suspected, she knew who “Naomi” was, and she wasn’t very happy to see a letter from him. With a heavy sigh, she set the letter down, shaking her head in disgust.

“Um… Do you intend to open it?” asked Rarity. Twilight just shook her head. “Twilight, you may as well read it. I wasn’t going to show it to you at all, but you’ve forced my hand. Just give it a look.”

“Why should I waste my time on that man?” asked Twilight. “Why should I give him the satisfaction?”

“Because he’s your father, and you don’t know what he might say. Give him a chance before you decide he’s not worth it.”

Twilight groaned, then grabbed up the letter. Had it been anyone else who told her to, she’d have ignored them, but Rarity had a way of making Twilight do things she wouldn’t ordinarily do. Twilight ripped open the envelope, pulled out the letter, and read through it quickly. Then, she walked out of the room. She returned a short second later with a butane torch used for barbecue grills. Locking eyes with Rarity as she did so, Twilight flicked on the lighter and brought the flame to the page, letting it burn for a few seconds in her hands before teleporting it to someplace where it could reduce to ash safely.

“Well, what did it say?” asked Rarity grimly.

“Exactly what you’d expect,” said Twilight. “He’s sorry, he was out of line, and he wants me to spend a bit of time in Canterlot with him so that we can sort things out.”

“That sounds great. Why’d you burn it?”

“He didn’t write it. After the whole brouhaha with the changelings, I started to study the handwriting of everyone I know,” said Twilight. “That wasn’t his. If he can’t even take the time to write the letter himself, then he’s clearly not all that sorry.”

Rarity realized that she had made things a bit awkward. Oh, how could she possibly salvage this?

“It’s been awhile since we’ve gone out together,” noted Rarity.

“Aj just had us over for dinner the day before yesterday,” said Twilight.

“I meant just the two of us,” Rarity slid onto the bed, slinking up next to Twilight. “I was thinking, maybe tomorrow, we can have a little picnic?” Rarity kissed her love, who sighed happily.

“Hm… Wait, tomorrow?” Twilight jolted back to reality. “Oh, no, it can’t be tomorrow. I need to head up to Canterlot tonight, remember? For that seminar?”

“Right, don’t know how I managed to forget that,” sighed Rarity, after just a moment of silence. She kissed Twilight again, longer this time. “Rain check?”

“Definitely. As soon as I get back, alright?” promised Twilight. “Will you come with me? I could use the company.”

“You know I would, love, but I have orders piling up at the Boutique,” said Rarity. “I’ve been considering hiring some help…”

Twilight nodded in understanding, even though she doubted how truthful Rarity was being. Similarly, Rarity doubted that Twilight was going to Canterlot for a seminar, mostly because she couldn’t recall Twilight ever mentioning it. Neither of them thought much of it, so neither of them mentioned it, and neither of them further suspected the other. However, both women had similarly ulterior motives, and both were fairly panicked, both at the lie and at the reality.


The next day, after Rarity had properly awoken herself, she put her mind to work, planning on what she’d do and how she’d do it. She wasn’t sure exactly when she decided she’d do it, but it was fairly recently. She was sure from day one that this would be the eventual outcome, but she never knew when she’d know the time was right. Something in her gut, though, told her that it was now the right time. Now, all she needed was a ring.

A ring, as simple as it was in concept, was probably the hardest decision Rarity ever made in her life. It had to be absolutely, positively, 100% perfect, and anything but absolute, positive, 100% perfection was a failure, as far as Rarity was concerned.

Rarity was a fairly successful entrepreneur, who was considering opening up a second location for her her already-profitable Boutique. She had a fair bit of money, and she could most likely afford any conceivable ring out there, within reason. This didn’t stop her from stressing over the slim possibility that Twilight would see any attempt at an engagement ring as cheap, or, even less likely, that she would care.

Some part of Rarity understood that she was being a little bit silly, and that the ring ultimately didn’t matter. Of course, Rarity almost understood when she was being silly, but her mind could not stop stressing the silly things enough to let them go. No, Rarity’s mind demanded perfection, so perfection she would have. But she couldn’t reach said perfection alone. She would need back up. So, as soon as she was out of the shower and had made herself a quick breakfast, she decided that she would go out and get help from her friends, who would most certainly know how to help.

Unfortunately, Fluttershy was currently visiting Discord in his dimension and Applejack was working Braeburn’s orchards. Considering Fluttershy had been gone for two weeks with no sign of returning anytime soon, and Braeburn had managed to break his leg again, it seemed that Rarity would be stuck with the two most unlikely candidates for help.

She decided to visit Pinkie Pie first, just to get it out of the way.

It was a quick jaunt from Twilight’s castle to Sugarcube Corner, and Rarity was there within five minutes. She entered the bakery, instantly charmed by the sweet aromas of the cakes, pies, buns, tarts, and cookies that the Cakes had crafted. The Cakes, or Mrs. Cake, at least, was manning the counter, her husband nowhere to be found. She saw Rarity and smiled widely.

“Well, hello there, stranger,” said Mrs. Cake. “I feel like I haven’t seen you in ages. How’re you doing, hon?”

“Marvelous, thank you for asking,” replied Rarity. Mrs. Cake had this strange quality about her, this ability to make you feel at home even if it’s your first time stepping in the bakery. “I do apologize for my scarcity lately. After everything that’s happened, I don’t want to leave Twilight for more than a second.”

“So, where’s the princess now?”

“She’s in Canterlot, currently. Magical seminar, I believe,” said Rarity, ignoring the rumbling in her stomach. “I’d have accompanied her, but there are some things I have to attend to here in Ponyville.”

“Of course, of course,” Mrs. Cake didn’t know exactly what Rarity meant, but she had a few ideas. “So, what can I get you, hon?”

“I didn’t actually even come here for treats,” said Rarity. Her stomach shouted in protest. “However… I wouldn’t say no to blueberry scone and a hot cup of earl grey.”

“Done and done. You came for Pinkie, then, right?” asked Mrs. Cake. “Go on ahead, I’ll bring it up to you. Oh, and be prepared, From what I gathered, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie are a bit hungover. I don’t know what that room looks like.”

Rarity thanked Mrs. Cake, both for the snacks and the warning, then headed past the counter, to and up the staircase, all the way to Pinkie’s room. Rarity pushed open the door (Pinkie never locked it, because she thought it was rude) and stepped into the room. Unsurprisingly, but still vaguely offensively, Pinkie’s bedroom was a mess. There were clothes everywhere, littered booze bottles, red SOLO cups, and a wooden barrel that, at some point the day before, probably contained a whole bunch of hard cider. Pinkie Pie seemed to have just woken up, as her hair was a different sort of mess than it usually was. It was just sloppy and tangly, instead of the cute ordered chaos that was normally associated with her. As for Rainbow Dash, she was wide awake, and holding a cup.

“Sup, Rares?” said RD with a grin. She took a sip and offered it to Rarity. “Want some?”

“It’s 10:15 AM,” said Rarity plainly.

“It’s 5 o’clock somewhere, right?” RD grinned even wider and, when Rarity still refused the cup, chugged it herself. “I’m just messing with you, it’s cola.”

“What’s up, Rarity? What brings you here so early?” asked Pinkie. “You and Twilight normally snuggle in bed until about noon.”

“How do you know that?” asked Rarity uncomfortably.

“I watch, sometimes,” said Pinkie. The other two looked at her uncomfortably. “What? That’s what friends do.”

“We will talk about this later,” said Rarity. “I don’t mean to offend either of you, but you would not be my first choice to ask for help with this. But, since the others are all gone, you’re my only hope. Will you two help me?”

Rainbow and Pinkie didn’t even have time to be offended. They weren’t just the type to let their friends down, and they would be there to help, come hell or high water. They both snapped to attention, ready to lend a hand and billowing with anticipation.

“I need your help to find a ring.”

And, just like that, they deflated. They should’ve known better. Leave it to Rarity, the mare of a thousand rings, to need help picking jewelry.

“Rarity, you own, like, a bagillion rings!” exclaimed RD. “Why do you need our help to find one? Aren’t you the fashionable one? What good is our help, anyway?”

“Not for me! For Twilight!” Rarity shook her head. “I want to propose when she gets back, and I need a ring to do so.”

Even more quickly than before, Pinkie Pie swelled with joy and excitement. It wasn’t long before she was scooping both of her friends up into a big, spine-mutilating hug.

“Oh, we’re so happy for you!” Pinkie squealed. She gasped, then dropped her friends. “We need to help you find a ring! What are we waiting for, let’s go!”

Before anyone could even attempt to stop her, she was gone, leaving behind a cartoonish silhouette of dust. Meanwhile, Dash clutched her ribs gingerly to make sure there weren’t any fractures, and struggled to regain her breath. When she finally recovered, she placed a hand gently on Rarity’s shoulder.

“Rares, I’m about to say something you’re probably not going to like,” said RD. “And I’m gonna say it, cause you’re my friend. You are not going to propose.”

“I beg your pardon?” asked Rarity.

“You’re not going to do it. Here’s what you’re going to do instead: You’re going to buy a perfect ring, arrange a perfect night, set the mood perfectly, and give yourself the perfect opportunity to pop the question,” said Rainbow, shaking her head disapprovingly. “Because that’s what you’re good at. You can set the scene, but you refuse to play the part.” Rarity looked a RD with confusion. “What I mean is that you have a habit of getting in your own way. Everything will be perfect, but you’ll fuss over some tiny detail and end up bailing on the whole thing, which isn’t fair to Twilight. Or you, when you think on it.”

“I am totally going to propose, Ms. Dash, and I don’t appreciate your lack of faith,” scoffed Rarity. “I promise you that!”

“Willing to wager?”

“What are the stakes?”

Rainbow Dash thought on it for a second.

“Twenty bucks and the loser’s cutest pair of panties?” asked Dash, offering her hand. Rarity shook without really thinking about she had just agreed to, only stopping to consider after the fact.

“Wait, what?! My cutest panties?” yelped Rarity. “But… I-I’m wearing them!”

“And you better hand them over when you don’t propose,” said Dash. “You shook, so the contract is legally binding. If you bail, you will forever be branded as a huge coward, and Applejack would probably lose all respect for you.”

“Alright, fine! If I lose the bet, which I will not, I will give you… my panties. Why do you want them, anyway?!”

Rainbow Dash just laughed. In truth, she didn’t expect Rarity to agree. But, now that she had, Rainbow would be having some fun with her in some way. She grinned widely for as long as she was with Rarity that day, immensely enjoying how hard Rarity was trying to prove her wrong. Rainbow Dash actually didn’t doubt that Rarity would propose. This just made things a whole lot more fun.

As Rainbow, Rarity, and Pinkie were shopping, Twilight Sparkle arrived in Canterlot. She had an appointment, not to participate in any seminar, but to visit an old friend, one whom she’d neglected quite a bit lately. She hoped to do two things, one of which was to pay that friend a good visit to catch up.

The other was to ask for advice.


Twilight walked through the familiar glistening halls of Canterlot Castle, none of her usual excitement when in the castle to be found. Today, she wasn’t here as a filly, or a student, or even as a fellow princess. Today, she was here as a friend, and as a daughter figure.

The guards, obviously, let Twilight go on right through without question. She was thankful for that, seeing as she had no time or place in her heart for unnecessary interactions on this day. She was already a stressed, nervous mess, and she didn’t need anyone throwing her even further off her game.

Twilight soon found her way through the magnificent halls of Canterlot Castle, stopping before to great, ornate doors. On the other side of these doors was the throne room, where Princess Celestia and perhaps Princess Luna would be waiting. Somehow, this thought calmed Twilight, knowing that she was about to get some guidance. With a tired sort of sigh, Twilight pushed open the doors and stepped into the throne room.

“Well, well, well. So you haven’t forgotten where I live, then?” said Princess Celestia with a smile. She was expecting Twilight, so she had decided to dress casually (though Twilight knew that the Princess’ simple white sundress was worth more than her entire wardrobe). The Princess of the Sun could be wearing a sweater, skinny jeans, and goulashes, and still find a way to exude beauty and grace.

“Hello, Princess Celestia,” said Twilight, matching her smile. “You’ll have to forgive me, I don’t know exactly what you mean.” Celestia smiled even wider.

“Oh, well, I had assumed you must have forgotten,” she said. “I can’t think of another reason for you to go so long without finding your way here for a visit. Unless… Unless, of course, you thought that finding the love of your life excused you from seeing your friends?”

“Not at all, Princess,” said Twilight. Celestia gave her a look that the princess was all too familiar with; She was doing it again. “Sorry, I promised to stop with the ‘princess’. It’s just tough, you know? All my life, you’ve been my teacher and my princess. It’s odd to think of you as anything else.”

“Those were the days, weren’t they? When my biggest worry was if you were going to go overboard and learn the entire course early.”

“Oh? And what would your worries be now?”

Celestia didn’t say anything at first. She rose to her hooves and crossed the room in just a few strides. She gestured for the door, and walked with her hand on Twilight’s shoulder out into the hall.

“Twilight, you are aware of my condition, aren’t you?” asked Celestia. “I don’t exactly keep it a secret, but I can’t have children.”

“Yes, I am aware. I think you might’ve told me once, when I was a kid,” said Twilight, nodding as the two walked through the halls. They caught a few looks of admiration that Twilight still wasn’t quite used to. Little did she know, neither was Celestia.

“I had always had some sort of regret for that fact. I’ve always wanted a child, a little girl or boy to teach about the world,” said Celestia. “But I never could have that. Until you came along. I’ve always regarded you as a daughter figure in my life. I remember like it was yesterday, you must’ve been about five or six years old, when we met for the first time. Now look at you.”

Celestia looked up and down the woman that was standing beside her, wondering where the years had gone. What had happened to her scrawny, awkward, big-headed unicorn filly? And where had this drop-dead gorgeous, genius alicorn woman come from?

“You asked me what I worried about,” said Celestia. “I worry about the inevitable. I’m not ashamed to say that I’m afraid, even. I’m afraid of the future. I fear for the day when you realize you don’t have time to humor your old mentor anymore. I fear for the day you grow up.”

Twilight was floored. Here she was worrying about herself, and how she was feeling, that she hardly even considered how Celestia might be taking the whole thing. Twilight never thought anything of it when she was spending the day with Rarity, or snuggling in bed until noon, but she had been severely neglecting one of the people she loved and admired the most. Twilight never thought it possible, but she was hurting the powerful Princess Celestia.

“Princess… I mean… Celestia,” said Twilight. “I’m 27 and getting married, not 98 and dying. I promise, you’ll never stop being a part of my life. I admire and respect you so much, Celestia, that you better believe that I’ll spend as much time as physically possible in your presence.”

“I know, I’m being silly, but-...” Celestia stopped in her tracks. “Wait, what was that? You’re getting married?!”

Whoops.

“Oh, well, uh…” stuttered Twilight.

“How long have you been engaged?! Is the ceremony today? Did you follow your brother’s example?”

Twilight couldn’t help but laugh at that.

“No, no, it’s not like that. If everything goes well, I’ve been engaged for negative 27 hours,” chuckled Twilight. “I want to propose to Rarity tomorrow. It’s actually partly why I came, besides catching up.”

Celestia looked around, realizing that there were a few guards and housekeepers around to have heard her little outburst. Just more fodder for the press. She looked around, spying a vacant bedroom a bit ahead of them.

“Let’s discuss this someplace a bit more private,” said Celestia, pointing for the door. The two alicorn princesses rushed for the door, the elder of which closing it behind them. It was a luxurious bedroom, as to be expected in Canterlot Castle and Twilight flopped onto the bed as soon as she saw it. Celestia smiled, remembering how little Twilight would do the same thing every night before bed, all those years ago. It must’ve been an eternity since Twilight was that small.

“So, I came here to ask you for some guidance,” said Twilight.

“Me? What exactly do you want me to tell you?” asked Celestia. “I’m happy for you. I hope you and Rarity are eternally happy.”

“Celestia, I don’t know if I should. What if she’s not ready? What if she doesn’t want to marry me?” asked Twilight panickedly. “What if I ask her, and she just says no?”

“If I may so ask… Why are you asking me?” asked the Sun Princess uneasily. “I would have thought it’d be more appropriate to ask Cadance about these matters.” Twilight sighed, running a hand through her mane nervously.

“Cadance can’t help me. She says she can’t directly interfere in other relationships past a certain point,” groaned Twilight. “She says my relationship has been past that point for a while. Even if she could help, I’d have asked your opinion. You’ve been guiding me for twenty years and you’ve never once steered me wrong.”

“Well… Even still, don’t you think you should have asked…” Celestia wasn’t sure why she was trying so hard to get out of this. “Perhaps your… your mother would be a better person for you to ask?”

Twilight sighed in slight annoyance, though none of it directed towards Celestia. She was still too upset to even consider speaking to her mother, let alone ask her for advice. And, somehow, Twilight guessed that Celestia knew that already.

“As you’ve no doubt heard, me and my parents aren’t on the greatest of terms,” said Twilight. “Because, as it turns out, I was born into a family of homophobic bigots. I can’t believe you haven’t heard yet, considering how much my dad tries to kiss your ass.” She locked eyes with her former teacher in slight embarrassment. “Erm...Pardon my language.”

“I was hoping that what I heard was nothing more than rumors,” sighed Celestia. “You know how people talk, anything to make life interesting. It saddens me to know that there is such a rift in your family as of now. Family is one of the few things guaranteed in life.”

“I didn’t come to talk about them, if you don’t mind. I’ll save that for another visit. Please, just tell me what to do.”

This was always a hard thing for Celestia to explain to her subjects: Though you may call her a goddess, she is just another person. She is godly, sure, but not a god herself. Her knowledge is limited by her years and, while those outnumber those of her subjects, are limited all the same. This never was, nor will it ever be, an easy thing to answer. Still, part of being a princess was to sound as though you have the answers, even when you have none.

“You want to know if you should marry her. I cannot answer that question,” said Celestia. “That is something that you can only answer yourself. Ask yourself this: Can you possibly imagine a happy life that did not involve Rarity?”

Twilight, always having been a fan of statistics, probabilities, and hypotheticals, had an answer far more scientific than need be. She reasoned that, in the infinite number of alternative universes, there must be a world in which she is perfectly happy without Rarity. However, Twilight got the feeling that that’s not exactly what Celestia meant. So, she tried envisioned every possible version of her own life that doesn’t stray too far from her current one, with the exception of removing Rarity.

She thought of nothing.

“No. I can’t. I need her in my life. I don’t know how I ever lived without her,” said Twilight.

“Do you think it could ever be considered a mistake to swear that you’ll live out the rest of your days together?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Do you think she feels the same?”

Twilight thought on that one a bit before answering. She thought back over the past year, through the twists and turns, the ups and downs. She thought about how sweet Rarity was, how she always attempted to make Twilight feel like a princess. Twilight thought about when she was sick, when they thought it was the end, and Rarity was by her side the entire way. She thought about how Rarity, in tears and with her feelings hurt like they’d never been hurt before, was willing to break her own heart even more so that Twilight could have her family. It all fell together and hit Twilight in the chest, until she felt like she couldn’t breathe.

“Yes,” said Twilight. Celestia smiled widely at her.

“Then I suppose the answer is obvious. There’s a jewelry store just a block up from where you used to live,” said Celestia brightly. “Twilight Sparkle, you are now on a mission to retrieve a perfect engagement ring for your fiance to be, and that store is obligated to sell it to you for as cheap as they can. I’ll send a letter.”

“Princess, that’s really not necessary, but…” Twilight got up and, for the first time in decades, hugged Princess Celestia. “Thank you.” Celestia patted Twilight on the head, feeling her insides melt into goo. Her little Twilight was all grown up now, and there wasn’t a thing to be done about it.

“Oh, that letter wouldn’t be because I don’t think you could afford it,” said Celestia. “I just want to remove all excuses, so you don’t… what’s the phrase? Ah, yes, I remember.” She smirked slyly at Twilight. “Chicken out.”

Twilight was about to protest that she had never chickened out of anything in her entire life, but instantly stopped herself. Celestia, as usual, was probably right; Twilight always had a way of convincing herself that a perfectly sound plan would fall apart due to one small, normally nonexistent flaw or detail. Celestia knew her well enough to know that.

And, just as fate had brought the two together, it had also brought them to a similar destination, with a similar goal. Just as before, the two were both similarly nervous, and gave themselves similar pep talks to convince themselves that they could do it, the other would say yes, and the two would live on in happiness.

They also experienced similar, crippling fear of the apparently nonexistent possibility that the other would refuse.