Gildaloo

by Bysen

First published

Scootaloo is the eldest of her friends and the first to reach the drinking age. She goes out to a pub one night and meets an an older woman and the two hit it off.

This is technically a shipfic as there is shipping but I consider it more of an awkward moments friendshipfic.
Scootaloo has just turned 18 [based on Australian drinking age laws] and goes out to a local bar that night. Ordering a drink and looking a bit nervous being here without her younger friends, an older woman comes up and sits down beside her. From there the two hit it off over there with shared interests in motocross, car engines and love of The Wonderbolts.
I am completely shocked that I can't find the term 'Gildaloo' anywhere else. Trade Mark.

New Chapter every Monday and Thursday! Completed!

Based on a side/back story from Happy Anniversary Sug. Not required reading.
Proof Readers: McStuffins and The Vault Tech.

Didn't think I'd be big on the pairing of Scoots and Gilda, but it actually works really well!

- McStuffins.

P.S. there are no SFW Gilda and Scootaloo pics I swear.

Bar Crawl

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She was slightly nervous. No, scratch that, she was absolutely horrified. This was Scootaloo’s first time at a bar and her first time drinking alcohol. Aside from a cheeky cider every so often back in Ponyville. She’d moved away from there a few years ago to start flight school here in Cloudsdale. Out of all her new friends here, and some old ones she still knew, Scootaloo was the oldest… but still “I think I’m gonna have to see some I.D before I serve you anything.” the bartender said giving this young girl the eye.

“Y-yeah.” Scootaloo replied as she grabbed her wallet out of her trousers pocket and handed him the card. “Here you go.” she said, but not loud enough for him here hear over the hustle and bustle of the bar as she a handed it to the guy. He looked at the picture then at her. The orange-ish skin, purple hair and childish smile matched. She sat on a stool, her dark blue jacket draped over the bar, she felt a little exposed in her dark-purple tank top but it was far too hot in here to wear the thing more. Even if the jacket had once belonged to Rainbow Dash.

“Alright Scootaloo. What’ll it be?” he asked, surprising her.

“H-how’d you know my name?!” she replied in a rush.

He just stared at her for a moment before retorting “Gee, I don’t know. I guess it’s just this power I was born with. Oh, here’s your ID back…” as he held the card out to her between two fingers. She sheepishly took it back, clearly feeling like the idiot she'd made of herself. The guy chuckled slightly and added “Relax. I’m guessing none of your friends can come here yet. Or they don’t know you're here. Either way; what’ll it be? First drink’s free. Happy birthday.”

Yep, that’s what the card said. Today was her 18th birthday. None of her friends were old enough to go out drinking yet and she was all alone here. Scared out of her gourd after hearing all those anti-drinking and date-rape stories from her overzealous social studies classes back in school. But still here. She’d made it this far so she wasn’t going to just walk away without at least having something to drink. Especially a free something to drink. “Uh… a hard cider. Sweet Apple stuff if you have it.”

“Coming up.” he said as he turned and walked towards the one of the fridges.

He came back less than half a minute later, but before that, Scootaloo took a look around the bar. There were a few people out on the dance floor. All of them obviously hammered since there was no music for them to be dancing to. Most of the people here just looked like groups of friends out for a night, two women here, two guys over there. Of course there were a few lone birds here too. She wanted to say they looked kinda pathetic drinking alone… but she knew what she looked like too.

Placing a rather large mug in front of the girl, the barkeep said to her “Now I gotta warn you. This stuff’s strong. Guessin’ this is your first time drinking too. Gotta know your limits kid. I’ma guess two’ll do ya. And I ain’t serving you no more than three.” oh yeah, all those responsible service of alcohol laws too.

“Heh, two?” Scootaloo laughed as she grabbed the mug and downed half of it in a matter of seconds. “I used to drink this stuff by the barrel back in Ponyville.”

“Really? And how old were you exactly.” he leant over the counter and asked her as she went to take another swig. She nearly choked mid mouthful. He only laughed in response. “Haha… just slow down a bit and tell me when you want another.” he said as he turned and went over to another patron, waving goodbye over his shoulder.

She had about just under half of the mug left and decided he was right. Don’t skoll it down, just nurse it for a while instead. Scootaloo took a small sip and placed it back on the table before looking around again. Lively as ever… same idiots still dancing to no music. A couple kissing over in a booth. A few other pairs of people and a few people still sitting alone. Which she was no longer one of she found out as she turned back around to see a woman now sitting beside her. And looking right at her.

“Hey.” Scootaloo greeted somewhat awkwardly.

“Hey.” the slightly buff woman replied. Her look was… ‘unique’. Short white hair with a purple tipped fringe that hung thinly over her eyes, which had purple eye shadow around them in turn. She wore a wool-lined leather jacket that must’ve been boiling in here and yellow elbow-high gloves. “So you’re from Ponyville huh?”

“Yeah. Moved from there with my dad to start flight school couple years back.” she answered the newcomer. “You ever been there?” Scootaloo added.

“Once. Years ago.” she replied smugly in return as she waved over the barkeep. “Couldn’t help but notice your Wonderbolt jacket. Doesn’t look like merch. Looks pretty official to me.” she said resting a yellow-gloved hand on the thing.

“Oh yeah!” Scootaloo boasted, lifting it up and showing her the embroidered Wonderbolts patch on the shoulder. “I got it from one of them! It’s like, the most awesome thing I own.” she added with a huge grin. Made even bigger by the slightly jealous look on the woman's face. “Hey, name’s Scootaloo by the way.”

“Gilda.” she told in turn, extending her hand. Scootaloo took it and shook it. The bartender had come back by this point and Gilda turned to him and said “This round’s on me…”

Your Ugly Mug

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They’d spent a few hours talking and drinking, and as promised, the bartender had cut Scootaloo off on her third mug. She wasn’t hammered but she was certainly drunk. Gilda wasn’t too much better herself but neither of them had a problem walking… well, as long as they held each other up every so often.

It was about 11 when Gilda had had enough of just hanging around and offered “It’s getting late, wanna come back ta my place? Coupl’a blocks down the street.” Scootaloo was hesitant at first but when Gilda added “How you getting home anyway?” she changed her mind. This may’ve been the closest pub to where she lived, but that was still about five K’s [kilometres] away.

Her only other choice was calling her dad to pick her up. So basically; she had no other choice. The two of them stumbled out of the bar and were cheered at loudly by a bunch of drunkards sitting out the front who’d been waving goodbye to everyone who left. Scootaloo laughed and heartily waved back, where as Gilda just sighed and gave a slight over the shoulder hand gesture.

The bar was on the edge of town and close to the suburbs but there was still a few city blocks between here and Gilda’s house. As they walked, she and Gilda kept talking about this and that. Wonderbolts, Equestria Games, bikes and cars. Scootaloo had very few friends who cared about this kinda stuff. Well, few female friends at least.

They shouted and laughed in the empty streets as they kept on going. The place was dead and empty this time of night so they could be as loud as they wanted. At least until they started to see some houses with some people either asleep or about to head off to bed, they’d have to keep it down then. But for now it was practically a shouting contest. It was all good fun… until it wasn’t.

They were far from anything now and in the brief moments that the two shut up the air was completely silent. Scootaloo had stopped thinking of all those stories she’d heard ages ago but they slowly started coming back to her as two guys stepped in front of them, seemingly out of nowhere… or possibly that alley. She heard some noise behind her too and saw a third guy closing in on them.

The girls stopped. Scootaloo quickly grabbed onto Gilda’s arm in both fear and to stop herself from falling over at the quick stop. Normally she wouldn’t be scared at all and could put up quite a fight herself. Her experience at school at taught her that. But only really against one or two. And with the state she was in she doubt she’d even be a match for one. She looked up to Gilda, now that they where this close she could see she was about a head taller than her.

Before Scootaloo could say what she was about to, Gilda spoke up to the guys “What do you want?” she hid it well but her speech was still slightly slurred.

“Oh, you hear that guys?” the guy behind them said with a slight chuckle as he made a few steps towards them. He was obviously drunk as well.

“Yeah, we heard her…” one of the two in front replied as they started forward as well. They too were just as wasted and all three of them closed in. The one behind them was the first to put a hand out to grab Gilda’s other arm. The next thing he knew, he was on the ground gasping for breath as Gilda had back-kicked him in the chest. She didn’t give the other two time to react as she used the force of that kick to send herself forward, slamming her fist into one of the front guy’s faces.

Before she could go for the third guy however he got a shot in on her. Gilda may’ve had a strong start but with all five of them in the state they were in, it only took one hit for anyone to go down. And she was no exception. Scootaloo was wide-eyed and terrified as the guy who now stood over Gilda looked at him. He was pissed… nut shot! Gilda from below with an uppercut.

He grasped his crotch and let out a squeal that neither of the females could hope to match the pitch of before falling onto Gilda. Scootaloo slowly went over to her friend and pushed and kicked the squirming man off of her. She helped Gilda up, sorta. Her friend was in a crawling position now with one hand holding the side of her face. She eventually grabbed Scootaloo’s hand to help her to her feet.

Gilda saw the first guy she’d punched out cold on the ground and the new unic still writhing in pain… “Behind you!” she shouted, the first guy she’d kicked was back up and right behind Scootaloo. Elbow to the face! Scootaloo spun around, inspired by Gilda to let these punks have… and he was already down. Clutching his bloody nose on the ground and groaning.

“Nice shot.” Gilda said putting her hand on Scootaloo's shoulder. Scootaloo nearly took a swing at Gilda too.

She turned to Gilda and told her “Let’s get the hell out of here!” fear evident on her face. Gilda took a look around. It was clearly over. They were safe now.

“Yeah, let’s get out of here.” she said, moving her hand from on Scootaloo’s shoulder to around her shoulders. And then began to walk past the unconscious guy. They then stopped. “One thing first.” she said, taking her hand off of the girl and leaning down. She rifled through the guys pockets for a moment before she found his wallets.

“Right! Getting his ID so we can call cops on them!” Scootaloo cheered at her friend's genius.

“Yeah… something like that.” she answered smugly as she took all his about 90 bucks out before chucking the wallet down a drain. She then stood back up and put her arm around a confused but at least now not scared any more and some-what amused Scootaloo and began to walk again. “Let’s get.” she said before calling out loudly “Thanks for the drinks fellas!” as they continued walking home.

The Cat in Gilda's Pants

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They arrived at Gilda’s place, a reasonably sized apartment, nice lounge room, kitchen right next to it separated by a counter and hallway to a few rooms. Standard block unit. Scootaloo was still a little shaken from what had happened. “Go take a seat, I’ll get you a drink.” Gilda said to her as she pointed her towards the couch in front of a giganormous TV. She did and tried to relax. “Beer, AJ, water…?”

“Water’s fine.” Scootaloo said. She was a tough girl, but who wouldn’t be scared after what she could only assume was attempted rape? Of course it could’ve just been a mugging but people tend to assume the worst. Gilda leant down over the back of the couch and handed her a glass. She put it on the table in front of her before jumping over the couch and landing in her seat. Rrrriiiipppp!!!!!

“Oh you’ve got to be rutting me.” she said as the middle seam of her jeans torn almost all the way to her belt. She felt down there and it went half way up the back of them too. “Wha-ti.. uh damn it.” she said as she stood up, moving her hands over her jeans and looking back at the couch to figure out what just happened.”I've jumped over that thing like a thousand times…”

“Must’ve been when you round-housed that guy.” Scootaloo told her. She knew from experience that high kicks in long pants either hurt like hell or lost you a pair… of jeans .

“Celestia damn it!” Gilda yelled as she grabbed the torn seam and just ripped her pants off into two separate pieces, one in each hand. She then calmly let out a sigh and said “That. Fucking. Hurt.” just because the middle seem was ripped, didn’t mean the ones running down the legs of them where, and she’d just torn the very expensive and very well made piece of clothing of from her legs. And those threads didn’t break easily. Not to mention the tips of her fingers hurt from putting so much force into them.

“Uh…” Scootaloo said as she looked at the woman standing in front of her wearing a wooly jacket up top and nothing but a pinkish-white pair of knickers that had to be at least one size too small down below. Gilda had a fat arse… in a good way though. And by that I mean it was mostly muscle.

“What?” Gilda said, sliding a thumb underneath her undies at the back and skimming it from that side to the front as she turned around. Scootaloo almost lost it at how positively opposite Gilda’s panties were to her personality. She was gruff and butch. These were the girliest pair of underwear Scootaloo had ever seen. At least since she was like three.

“Pfft-hhaha… hello kitty.” she laughed as she greeted the iconic cat on the front of them.

“Har-dee-har… well what do yours look like then?” Gilda said as she put her hands on her hips and tilted sideways a bit more… only making herself look now like a valley girl. Scootaloo just lost it then. She laughed hard and loud. Until Gilda leant down and put her face right up to hers and told her, leaning with one arm beside her against the back of the couch. “You know I ripped them kicking someone’s arse right?” with more than just a hint of threat in her tone.

Scootaloo quickly shut up. The two stayed face to face for a few moments, Gilda frowning, Scootaloo slowly growing back to the fear levels of about ten minutes ago. Then Gilda started laughing as she pulled away. “By Celestia, Gilda… I just about shit a brick there!” Scootaloo said as she joined in laughing lightly. Gilda plopped down beside her on the couch once more and through an arm over her shoulder.

“You didn’t answer my question.” Gilda said softly as she turned her head towards her friend. Scootaloo turned to her as well and gave a questioning look. “What do yours look like?” Gilda asked.

“Like… underwear?” Scootaloo answered. Gilda raised an eyebrow but before she could speak Scootaloo added “No way, I am not showing you.”

“Quit being such a tease…” Gilda replied with a smirk.

“What? Listen, I’m not gay or anything.” Scootaloo said. Thinking back on it, it was possible this chick hadn’t been just striking up a conversation, instead she’d been flirting with her.

“Yeah, sure.” Gilda said as she leant in and kissed the girl in her arm. Elbow to the face! Scootaloo pulled away and put as much distance between herself and Gilda on the couch, pushing right up against the arm of it, leaving a full person’s space between them.

“The hell did I just tell you!” she yelled and started eyeing the door, starting to think she may’ve been safer hoping it had just been a mugging from those guys than in here now with this lesbo.

Gilda coughed and groaned a bit from Scootaloo’s hit and raised a hand to the side of her face. The angle hadn’t let Scootaloo hit as hard as she had with the other guy before but it still hurt. She looked up at Scootaloo, pressed up against the other side of their seat. Her eyes were switching back and forth between Gilda and the door. “What the… what the hell Scootaloo?”

This surprised her. It didn’t stop her from preparing to bolt the second Gilda made a move but it still surprised her. “What the hell ‘what the hell’?” she nearly screamed. “Stay away from me dyke. I say I’m not a lesbo and you try ta start making out with me? Whaddya think was going to happen!?”

“Wait… you meant that?” Gilda asked as she continued to rub her sore face. Scootaloo’s expression screamed ‘dafuq do you think?!’. And at that point Gilda felt like an arse. “By Luna… I’m so sorry Scootaloo. I uh… I guess I misread that.”

“You think?” Scootaloo replied. She started to calm now. She was freaked but at least saw how it could’ve been an honest mistake. “Listen… I uh... next time you hit on another mare, tell them you’re hitting on them first. And... oh god! ESPECIALLY tell them that if you invited them back to your place!” she said, realizing what had been implied with her coming here.

“Uh... yeah. Sorry about that.” Gilda said, sounding genuinely apologetic. At this point Scootaloo had calmed down again. Her throat still hurt from screaming though. She hesitantly picked up the glass of water, 99% sure it wasn’t drugged, and took a few sips. Gilda continued from what she’d said before with “But… you know that was a gay bar right?” Spit take!

Scootaloo nearly choked on the water as half the glass dribbled down her face. “Seriously?!” she shouted.

“You know this is an apartment right? Mind keeping it down.” she said, receiving a deadpan expression from Scootaloo. “Yeah, it is. Well it is on Thursdays anyway. And guess what day it is.” Gilda said. the briefest smirk appeared on her face from her bad joke but was quickly washed away by Scootaloo’s obvious disarray. “Look, I’m sorry about this whole mess. You can sleep on the couch tonight and I'll drive you wherever tomorrow. Deal?”

“Yeah… thanks.” Scootaloo replied. The two then just stayed there for a few moments, awkwardly meeting and breaking eye contact until finally Gilda spoke up.

“Right, well... I’m gonna go put on some pants.”

Lime-green cliché

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The morning had started out awkward. Mostly because Scootaloo had been woken up when Gilda came out, not seeing her on the couch, and started making breakfast in just her underwear. It got better after that as Gilda quickly got dressed and once that was out of the way, the two sat down for breakfast.Toast, cereal and some juice. They didn’t talk much but Gilda’s offer to drive her home still stood.

Gilda lived on the second floor with her car park a few spaces over from the stairwell. The two went down shortly after breakfast, Scootaloo in a bit of a hurry to get this day over with so she took the lead down. Of course she then had to let Gilda take over as she had no idea what her car looked like. When Gilda pointed it out, Scootaloo was a little let down and surprised. It wasn’t a bad car, but for all Gilda’s talk of the Wonderbolts and X-tream motocross last night she was expecting something a bit flashier, not your standard lime-green cliché bad car.

Gilda saw Scootaloo’s lackluster reaction to her car, and told her “You know I don’t have to offer you a ride…” she said snidely before she jumped into the driver’s seat. A ride in this junker was better than no ride at all. “Hey, do me a favor. The belt doesn’t clip so if we get pulled over just sit on the thing so it looks like it’s done up, alright?”

“S-sure.” Scootaloo spoke what she was sure would be her last words. She hesitantly got in and tried the belt… it worked. She looked up at Gilda slightly confused, only to be met with the girl grinning with an amused looked to her. “Har har.” Scootaloo said as Gilda turned the ignition. She put it in reverse and backed out. Fast. The car may not look it, but Gilda certainly drove like she’d spoken of last night.

Once they were out of the apartment block her driving leveled out on the open roads.”So where to?” Gilda finally asked.

“I live up at the northern reaches.” she answered.

“Rich neighbourhood huh? And you still made me pay for your drinks last night.” Gilda joked, eliciting a chuckle from Scootaloo too. She then added “Didn’t even put out either.”

“Gilda.” Scootaloo said, clearly not amused by that last comment. She thought this was awkward enough as it was, let alone her bringing it up in some manner or another for the third time this morning. But Gilda found it funny and to her that was the main thing. She snickered a little but after that the two of them stayed silent for about five minutes. The silence was finally broken not far from Scootaloo’s place when she asked “Can I… ask you something Gilda?”

“Why did you choose me?” Scootaloo asked. This managed to catch Gilda’s attention as she took her eyes off the road. Of course in the early morning traffic they were only going about 20 an hour anyway.

“Well. Aside from I thought you knew it was gay night… I saw how nervous you were. And you’re young so I figured you were still closeted or something. Thought I’d help out. That and you’re hot.” Gilda answered.

“Thanks. I guess.” Scootaloo quite wasn’t sure which answer she liked more. However on a counterpoint, she didn’t know which one was worse either. “And uh, sorry about calling you a dyke last night. I was just kinda… you know.”

“Yeah, don’t sweat it.” Gilda said as she shifted her attention back to the road.

“I don’t have anything against gays. I mean lesbians.”

“I get it.”

“Or L.B.T.Y.- whatever that acronym is.”

“Uh huh…”

“What do you identify as?”

“Hey Scootaloo?”

“Yeah?”

“Shut up.” Gilda stated.

“Sorry.” Scootaloo replied, realising she’d just been making a fool of herself. “I just, I’ve been…”

“Let me guess. Tomboy, loves bikes and motocross, mullet. You’ve been teased about being gay as a kid.” Gilda said and briefly looked at her friend, receiving a nod as she did. “Well then screw ‘em. If you’re not then who cares what those fags think?”

“Yeah, like I haven’t been told that a hundred times…” Scootaloo retorted to Gilda’s ‘words of wisdom’.

“Have you ever been told them by a dyke before?”

“Well, no.” Scootaloo pondered on that for a moment, not quite sure if that fact actually made a difference or not on the advice. She then thought of something else “How come you just called yourself a dyke and said fag? Last person I said that to… was…” and Scootaloo trailed off before adding “Um, I’m down this street.” and pointed to the left. A few moments later Gilda made the turn.

The street went pretty far but Gilda knew there wasn’t much down this road, only about a minute or three’s drive to the end of it. “So who was the person you said that to?” she asked, getting a feeling she knew where this was going.

“A friend a few years ago. I’m not sure if she’s my friend anymore though.” Scootaloo said as she clutched her blue jacket with one of her hands. Also confirming what Gilda had figured. “She came out… and I was a stupid kid then and didn’t exactly say the nicest things about it. We fought and… well, you can guess the rest.”

“Yeah, I lost a friend too like that. Her name was Rai-”

“Sorry but that’s my turn there.” Scootaloo quickly said, pointing to a street they were about to miss. Gilda quickly switched lanes and made the turn. She was about to start again when Scootaloo added “I’m just over here.” and pointed to her house. Gilda pulled over and finally got to look directly at Scootaloo. It was clear to her now that this whole conversation had gotten her down. “Well, thanks for the lift. See ya.”

And with that Scootaloo got out of the car and was a couple of steps in front of it when “Hey, hold up a sec." Gilda called to her. Scootaloo walked back around the hood of the car and stepped up to the driver side window. “Give me your phone real fast.” Gilda added as she put her hand out the window. Scootaloo stared for a moment before reaching into one of her pockets and handing it over. “See ya!”

And Gilda floored it, phone in hand. The car went zero to sixty in three point five. Then stopped about a second later, looking at Scootaloo in the mirror and the look on her face thinking Gilda had just stolen her phone. Priceless. Scootaloo sighed and walked up to the window, half expecting Gilda to drive off again. She reached it and leant on the door. “Alright, now give us back my phone.”

“Yeah, just a second.” she said, tapping on the screen. “I’ma give you two things.” Gilda said as Scootaloo leaned into the window to see what she was doing on her phone. Before Scootaloo could see what she was doing, Gilda held the phone up in front of herself. Flash. She moved it back tapped the screen a few more times and then flipped her wrist, pointing the phone back towards Scootaloo. “You got my number now. You better call sometime.”

“Sure.” Scootaloo replied to what was more a demand than request. As she grabbed her phone. “What’s the second thing?”

“This.” and with that Gilda leant in and kissed Scootaloo. Needless to say, Scootaloo was surprised. She would’ve fought it if it had been a deep kiss but it was just a peck on the lips. Of course she still jerked back shortly afterwards. “Do with that what you will.” Gilda said before turning back to the road and revved the engine. Her wheels spun as she did a small burnout in the street to turn around. She called out once more as she drove off “Later Dweeb!”

Scootaloo stood there for a moment before the cloud of rubber smoke hit her and she started to cough. Not what she’d expected… then again, she probably should have. She looked down at her phone and saw the picture.

“Wow… how did I not notice her doing a kawaii peace sign?”













This is NOT a date!

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“Hello?”

“Hey Gilda, it’s Scootaloo.”

“Sorry, there’s no ‘Gilda’ here. I think you’ve got the wrong number.”

“Nice try, but I recognise your voice.” Scootaloo replied with a bemused tone.

“Alright, alright. So what’s up?” Gilda asked as she flopped down onto the couch. Naked. It was early Saturday morning and had been over two weeks since she'd last heard from Scootaloo. “You know I was starting ta worry I had given you the wrong number. What took ya so long to call?”

“Gee, I can’t imagine…” Scootaloo replied, hoping her deadpan expression transferred over the phone. She assumed it did as Gilda laughed. Scootaloo sighed as Gilda quieted and added “Anyway, I heard Soarin’’s gonna be in town this weekend and I’d bet my bike he’ll be at that pie place that opened a few months ago.”

“So, you wanna meet up the mall about lunch and see if we run into him?” Gilda asked.

“Yeah, sounds like a plan.” she said before pausing for a moment, not quite wanting to but knowing she had to say this next part. “This isn’t a date though. Just wanna make that clear.”

“Sure, whatever you say.”

“Yeah well, I’d bring my other friends but the only person I even know who likes the Wonderbolts said he has plans this weekend and I… you’ve already hung up haven’t you?”

~ ~

They met up at a table in the food court, next to the cinema. Scootaloo had arrived early and looked over the movies showing. Nothing looked good, except one thing but due to the stigma on vampire movies these days she wasn’t going to be seeing that one. Especially not with Gilda. Even if it was based on a true story about one of her old friends from back in Ponyville.

After a fist-bump and hello “You gotten lunch yet?” Gilda asked as she took a seat opposite scootaloo, all the while looking at the shops around them. Wak Arnold, Good Burger, A Fish Called Rhonda, Pho Sizzle Ma Noodles, Lord of the Fries and/or Onion Ring, The Thai Tanic, Burger Princess and of course some Fu King Chinese Restaurant that was named Wok This Way. It was just before twelve at this point and the place was just starting to get crowded.

“Na, not yet.” Scootaloo replied. “We were gonna try to find Soarin’ at that pie shop. Figured we’d have lunch there. ‘Less you want ta grab something to eat now I say we head over there. It’s like a ten minute walk from here.”

“Sounds like a plan ta me. ‘Cept want to just drive there instead?” she asked as she leant back in her chair and pulled out her keys, flashing a grin.

“In your junker? Nnno…” Scootaloo answered with her own grin as Gilda’s disappeared.

“Eh, your loss.” she replied as she threw them back in her purse and stood up. All females, even her, carry a purse. That’s just scientific fact. Pink croc leather by the way. Joke was on Scootaloo though as Gilda hadn’t taken her car here… she’d even brought a spare helmet. “Let’s blow this joint.” she said as she stood and began off slowly. Scootaloo got up too and fell in line beside her friend. The two started up a conversation about which of the fast food shops had the stupidest name and why every shop’s name seemed to be some horrible pun.

They were leaving the shopping centre when Scootaloo abruptly changed the topic “The place’s down this way.” she said and pointed a thumb to her right and continued walking off in that direction. They walked and talked for a while, turning a corner at one point along the way as the subject changed a few times too. From the Wonderbolts, to Soarin’ himself to even laughing about the pub they’d met in and how Gilda had still managed to get her number out of it.

“This is the place.” Scootaloo said as she looked up at the big hanging sign that read ‘Season On Piatus'. Seriously, ever god damn shop! Scootaloo in the lead turned into the shop, but not before Gilda reached a hand up and slapped the sign slightly before she followed inside.

Soarin’ wasn’t here. Shocker! It was a small shop, just a straight line to the counter and display case with a few small tables and seats off to the side. Along with a variety of pies they had various other treats. “So what d'ya want?” Gilda asked as she pulled out her purse.

“Uhh…” Scootaloo uhh’d as she took a look at the menu board before finding “Oh! Raspberry cobbler split.” she said more to the younger woman behind the counter than to Gilda.

“I’ll just grab an apple pie.” Gilda told the waitress as well. she nodded and tapped some thing into the register before it showed the total price to them. Gilda grabbed out her purse once more and so did Scootaloo. Gilda however stopped her by saying “Relax, I got this.” as she handed over a fifty.

“No, it’s cool. I can pay for my own lunch Gilda.”

“Really? You got a job?” she asked her younger friend.

“Uh.” Scootaloo replied, not wanting to say no.

“Bet you still live with your folk too.”

“Uhh…”

“Yeah. I got this.” Gilda smirked. Truth was Scootaloo had about ten bits and bus fare. Which was only about 5 bits less than she had the night they’d met. Gilda remembered how tight money could be after she had finished and/or dropped out of school. But as nice as she was being, it was just as much meant to annoy Scootaloo too. Gilda hated it back then whenever someone paid for her. Something about dominant pride or some psycho-mumbo-jumbo.

The waitress came back with their orders within a minute or so and neither had said another word since. The two took their plates, Gilda following Scootaloo as she walked over to a table off to the side. They sat mostly in silence, almost opposite of the last time they’d drunkenly gabbed at one another. It wasn’t awkward silence, just regular silence.

“So… what? Too good to let me pay for your lunch?” Gilda finally asked, breaking the silence at long last. Scootaloo just continued to chew what she had before replying. She’d been eating rather fast and a third of her sunday was already gone.

“No. It’s not that, it’s just…” Scootaloo trailed off and looked away. Was she?... she was…

“Are you blushing?” Gilda asked. “Oh my Celestia you are!”

“Shut up!” Scootaloo replied as Gilda laughed at her. “This isn’t a date okay! I don’t need you trying to be chivalrous and…” Scootaloo paused as she noticed a second thing about Gilda paying for her too. “What makes you think you’re meant to be the guy in this was! Paying for me like I can be bought.”

“Geez… be more pound-sign whyineedmarenism why don’t ya?” Gilda snidely replied. “What makes you think this is meant ta be a date anyway?” she added with a furrowed brow.

“You wer…” Scootaloo started but was cut off.

“I made one mistake, that was kinda your fault too, and now what? I’m trying to turn you gay?” Gilda said, actually starting to sound offended. “Seriously! On the phone, you said it wasn’t a date, you punch me in the face when I tried to kiss you, what the fuck makes you even think I’m interested in a scrawny little dweeb like you anyway?” Gilda snapped as she firmly planted her hands on the table and stood up, locking her narrowed eyes on Scootaloo.

Scootaloo for her part cowered back at first, she quickly pulled herself together though. There was no way she was going to let this woman yell at her like that. She was about to stand up but before she could Gilda just started laughing, almost hysterically as she slowly sat back down. It quickly turned Scootaloo’s rage to confusion as she had no idea what was with this crazy chick, then she realised…

“Oh.. man! You should’ve seen the look on your face Scootaloo!” Gilda laughed with a strong smile. "Poh-ho man was it priceless!” she added almost having to wipe a tear from her eye she’d laughed so hard from it. “Chillax, alright. This ain’t a date. What the hell even made you think it was?”

Scootaloo just stayed silent for a couple of seconds as she turned away slightly. “Well…” she began, still looking away. “the night we met. You were definitely trying to pick me up then. And like, you were paying for all my drinks. So you know… paying for my lunch.”

“That all?” Gilda raised and eyebrow to that reply, still laughing a little bit. “Dude. I was trying to be nice and you know, make up for that night.” she said with a smirk. Scootaloo clearly felt like an idiot at this point.

“Right… sorry, I guess, for jumping ahead there.”

“Forget about it. Listen, I know you’re straight. I ain’t gonna try to ‘pick you up’ again. Just, try not to act like a total dweeb and freak out over nothing like that agai… holy shit! He’s here!” Gilda said as she pointed behind and slightly to the side of Scootaloo to Soarin’ just walking in the door with a few people following him.

Scootaloo followed her finger. The first thing she saw however was something else. “Oh no…”

“Huh? Yo, he’s the whole reason we’re here. What’s wrong with you?”

“See that guy with the gelled up jet-black hair?” Scootaloo asked, referring to one of the younger people wandering in with the Wonderbolt. “I know that guy from school. There’s absolutely no way I can let Rumble see me here on a date with another girl!”

“I thought this wasn’t a date…” Gilda replied smugly.

“Just shut up and help me hide!”

Soar feelings

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As Soarin’ walked up to the counter, the waitress had yelled something to another worker out the back. The redhead behind the counter was shortly joined by another male waiter who looked almost like her twin. Both of them gawked over who had just come into their store and eventually got past their fangasming and high pitched squeals to actually take his order.

Back over at Scootaloo and Gilda’s table however, Scootaloo was trying to shrink down in her seat despite one of her idols being so near by. Gilda just stared at her with an expression that screamed ‘Seriously?...’ as the girl pulled her jacket up over her head. Which besides the fact that it looked stupid, was a Wonderbolts jacket anyway and would draw even more attention towards than it normally would anyway.

“Put that thing down and stop acting like a moron.” Gilda said as she reached across the table and yanked Scootaloos jacket back to her shoulders. She could understand Scootaloo’s angst, remembering Scootaloo had said some stuff about being teased in school about being gay. Still this was over the top and actually kinda offensive to Gilda. “Listen Squirt, chillax. That guy’s name’s Rumble right?”

“Yeah.” Scootaloo replied, thinking Gilda was about to suggest some sort of plan to get away from him.

“Yo! Rumble!” Gilda yelled out barely a second after Scootaloo had answered as she waved an arm up in the air. Rumble turned towards them and though he couldn’t see it, Scootaloo’s face had just fallen off of her face. He had no idea who this person calling to him was but he easily recognised the back of Scootaloo's head. If you know what I mean. He had sat behind her in class for over a year after all.

He turned back to Soarin’ and told him “Dude-Man-Bro, it’s been awesome meeting ya. I gotta go though Bro-Man-Dude. Catch ya ‘gain some time Man-Bro-Dude.” and he put out a fist for Soarin’ to bump. Soarin’ gave the boy what he wanted and turned back to the waitress he was giving his autograph/phone number too. Rumble walked up to the table, turned his cap from backwards to sideways and sat down beside Scootaloo, throwing an arm over her shoulder as he landed. “Yo what’s up Scoota-lewd?!”

She didn’t answer, however. Gilda did for her. “Not much. She’s just freaking out about you thinking she’s a les and we’re on a date.”

“What the actual hell Gilda?!” Scootaloo almost yelled and would’ve been heard by the whole restaurant if there hadn’t been a celebrity in the shop drawing attention away from them. She looked at Rumble next to her, their faces barely a hand’s length away from each other. “I’m not gay Rumble. This isn’t a date! I swear!” she told with an obvious amount of fear in her voice. When they were younger, before they’d become friends over their shared love of The Wonderbolts and over similar eXstreaming web series, Rumble had been one of the boys teasing her about being gay for liking those very same things.

“Geez. Make it sound like I’m some sort of leper for being inta chicks why don’t cha?” Gilda replied in monotone. “I’m not allowed ta have girl friends that aren’t my ‘girlfriends’ now?”

“Yeah!” Scootaloo said with force. She wasn’t so much defending Gilda’s side as much as her own. “She’s like what we have. Just cause you’re a guy and I’m a girl doesn’t mean we’ll automatically hook up, right? We can be friends with none of that BS other stuff.” Scootaloo said. Rumble didn’t show it but Gilda visibly cringed as she watched a guy get friendzoned before her eyes.

“What, you gay or something?” Rumble said as he turned towards Gilda. #subtle

“What gave it away…” she replied, cocking an eyebrow. As much as this was to get under Scootaloo’s skin and was starting to get under Gilda’s own skin, it at least made the situation clear to Rumble.

“So you’re on a date? I thought you liked dick.” Rumble said with complete sincerity. Didn’t stop Gilda from laughing at the top her lungs at this kid’s brazenness. With any other girl he would’ve put it more tactfully but with Scootaloo he knew he could get away with it. She certainly wasn’t one of the guys to him, but she fit in with them just as much. Which in truth was partly the reason her sexuality was questioned in the first place.

Scootaloo at least had the good grace to not lose her top over it. “Well clearly I do if I’m friends with a dick like you…” she said as she jabbed him in the shoulder. Hard. “I’m straight alright. We’ve gone over this.”

“How could I forget. That time you and Sweetie Belle… damn girl…”

“You and Button Mash.” Scootaloo stated, which shut Rumble up in an instant and of course got another hearty laugh from Gilda. Rumble’s face yelled what could only be described as a ‘I thought we agreed never to talk about that’ look. “I’m not gay, alright?”

“Alright…” Rumble chuckled. “I believe you. You know I do. Scoots.” he said, making it clear to Gilda these two had something between them. “Don’t mean I ain’t gonna rib you ‘bout being a lesbo though.” or not… what a dick. And as you’d expect, this earned him a an elbow to the chest, much harder than her shoulder-punch before was.

The wind knocked out of Rumble’s chest, he wheezed heavily for a couple of moments. He slowly recovered though and none of them noticed, or even remember, that Soarin’ was in this restaurant with them. Not until he sat down beside Gilda that is. “Still wearing that jacket, huh Scootaloo?” he said.

Both Gilda and Rumble stared at Soarin’, half slack jawed for a moment before what he’d said sunk in as they both quickly swivelled their heads towards Scootaloo. “Sure am.” she replied casually, as if this was just another person and not a legendary Wonderbolt. “Oh, that reminds me. Gilda, Rumble. This is Soarin’, thought ya might wanna meet him.” she said with a smug grin.

“You know each other?!” Gilda exclaimed. Actually, come to think of it, it didn’t entirely surprise her. Scootaloo had mentioned something about having gotten the jacket she was wearing now from one of The Wonderbolts. “So he’s the one you got that thing from.” Gilda said as she leant over the table and gave a slight pull on the collar.

“Oh yeah, forgot you knew Soarin’.” Rumble stated with a noticeable hint of jealousy in his voice. “Na, she got that jacket from Rai-”

“Your apple pie Mister Soarin’.” the waiter said as he placed the food down in front of him.

“Please… ‘Mister Soarin’’s my father’s name.” he said joyously. The young brown-haired waiter was about to laugh along with him. But before long, with a much sterner voice, Soarin’ added “You can call me Sir.” as he furrowed his brow and glared at the waiter. The boy just looked crushed and nervous at the same time as he backed up a step before turning and leaving.

Once he was out of earshot both Soarin’ and Scootaloo just started trying to hold back their laughter. “Still messing with your fans… such a role model.” Scootaloo told the jerk.

“Pretty much. Still haven’t even said hey to these two yet after all.” he said as he picked up a fork and cut off a piece of pie.

“I’m not sure if this guy’s funny or’s just a jerk… I like his style.” Gilda said as she leant over the table slightly and putting flirtatious emphasis on the last words.

“Wouldn’t expect any less from a lady such a-oh Celestia that’s good!” Soarin’ half replied as he shoved a piece of pie in his mouth. He completely lost any train of thought he was having and just devolved into nom’ing down his pie!

“Tabloids weren’t kidding, huh?” Gilda said as she leant back off of the table, all attraction gone from her tone as she watched Soarin’ eat… no that’s too nice of a term, ‘devour’ suited what they were looking at more aptly. As creepy as it was watching him ingest his pie, she couldn’t help but feel hungry from how much pleasure he was getting from it. She looked down to her own food and began to eat once more.

The table quickly took on an awkward silence as everyone ate. Well, silence except for a constant ‘om nom nom’ing coming from Soarin’. Eventually Scootaloo broke the silence as she just remembered something from earlier this morning. “Hey, I just remembered something from earlier this morning. What happened to you being ‘too busy’ ta hang with me today?” she asked Rumble. Both he and Dildo looked up from their plates at her. Soarin kept eating though but he was probably listening still.

“I told you, I had plans.” he replied.

“Yeah I know, and then you come in here following Soarin’ around.”

“Well yeah… that was what my plan was. Everyone knew he was in town, figured I’d try to find him.” Rumble said as he realised that they’d being planning on doing the same thing all along.

“And you didn’t think I’d like ta come along to meet a Wonderbolt?...” she asked as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Because it was. And he knew her well enough for it to be so too. Of course it wasn’t his fault.

“You know I was gonna ask if you wanted to come if you hadn’t hung up as soon as I said I had something. Hell, I was going to call you before you called me.” he said, almost sounding dejected. Then however his tone changed “‘Course I guess I know why you were in such a rush to ditch me. You and this chick here were on a date and all. Wouldn’t want me to find out.” his smugness didn’t last too long though “Ough!” he yelped.

Scootaloo elbowed him sharply. And unbeknownst to her, Soarin’ had given him a strong kick in the shin too. Gilda however just laughed. “Geez… why don’t you two just hook up already?” she half-laughed before taking another bite of her own pie. Soarin’’s was all gone by this point and he had been licking his plate clean.

“This joker?” Scootaloo asked.

“She couldn’t handle me.” he said cockily.

Gilda was about to say something more when Soarin’ started to stand up. He leant over a bit and grabbed a napkin from past Rumble. “Keep this up and no girl ever will.” he whispered sternly to the younger boy before standing and cleaning his mouth, and most of his face with the wipe. “Well it’s been great catching up with you Scoots, you two too, but I gotta go. There’s still three more pastry shops I gotta visit today.”

“Heh… yeah. I’ll catch ya ‘round.” Gilda she said and gave a salute-wave goodbye with one hand while slyly slapping his butt with the other. He smiled and threw her a wink before he began off. Gilda, after telling herself to think unsexy thoughts, then looked down at her not-even-half-finished pie that she'd eaten in more than twice the time he had and yet he was off to eat at least another three. And she was nearly full already.

-A

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“Don’t get me wrong. I’d totally prefer Spitfire, but Soarin’ ain’t half bad either.” Gilda answered Rumble. Scootaloo was just keeping quiet while these two talked about which Wonderbolts they’d like to bang. Besides the fact that Rumble kept asking Gilda about her sexuality, and making the occasional comment towards Scootaloo’s too, it was even awkwarder for her since she personally knew a good number of The Wonderbolts.

She’d ordered a second desert by now as these two had hit it off and just started bantering with each other for over an hour-odd now. Don’t get the wrong idea though, she didn’t feel like a third wheel or anything. Before when they’d just been talking about the last Wonderbolt shows either of them attended and Scootaloo was right in the middle of that conversation.

Rumble was really the only friend she had that she could talk to about this kind of motocross stuff without feeling weird. Mostly because all her other friends were girls and none of them cared about this stuff at all. Despite the fact that the majority of The Wonderbolts were female themselves. Not to mention how just plain awesome it was, and those statistics that said the fanbase was nearly 50:50 male:female ratio, Gilda was the only female she knew who enjoyed it. Well, only one she still knew.

The conversation came to a brief stop though as Rumble’s phone began to ring. “Hello? … Oh yeah, I met him, even ate lunch with him. ... Yeah. … Sure, I’ll be there in about half an hour. … Alright, see ya.” he said as he hung up. “I gotta get going, my ride’s gonna meet up at the pier.”

“Your ringtone is Funky Town.?” Gilda both stated and questioned as she raised an eyebrow towards him.

“His mom’s ring tone is Funky Town.” Scootaloo told her friend as she pulled out her own phone. “Not as bad as the one he has set for me though.” and with that she pressed call and a moment later the Chicken Dance Song started playing from his phone. Gilda laughed at it, completely unaware at how much trauma that joke had once caused her. If Scootaloo didn’t find it kinda funny how Rumble had given everyone he knows a stupid ringtone she’d have decked him for it years ago.

“I was gonna offer you a ride but not anymore.” he declared, as if the threat actually held any merit.

“Yeah… I think I’ll pass on any ride with your mom anyway thanks.” she said. “Thunderlane on the other hand…” Scootaloo finished in a seductive tone. Rumble wasn’t the only one who intentionally made things awkward and sexual between them.

“Tss… yeah cause my mom’s so bad. Remember when your dad came to sch-” he began but was cut off my Scootaloo.

“A-ba-ba-ba!” she said and flailed her arms slightly in his direction as her eyes shifted between him and Gilda. She then leant over the table and told him “Ix ne on the oolscra!”

“Uh… that’s not real pig latin and I’m pretty sure she understood it anyway.” Rumble commented. Gilda huffed out a slight chuckle but cut it off as Scootaloo pulled Rumble in closer and whispered something to him. He looked at Gilda slightly confused for a moment before Scootaloo pulled away. “Alright, alright… all I was gonna say is in school last year he picked us all up and the car stank like a cat had pissed in it. And you don't own a cat.”

“What the hell!?” Scootaloo exploded. “I just said don’t say tell her that, she thinks I’m e-”

“I didn’t.” he said smugly cutting her off before she herself said it instead. Scootaloo thought about it for a second before realising he was right. That didn’t stop her from giving him the death stare though. And kicking him under the table. Twice. Repeatedly. Until he left! “Ok, ok, stop it already!” he said as he stood up and away from her legs. “I get it, you wanna seem cool to your lover here.”

“That’s not…”

“Yeah, yeah. Anyway, I’ll see you on Monday Scoots. You know why…” he said smugly as he turned and waved a hand over his shoulder. “See ya ladies!” he called back as he headed for the door. Scootaloo just groaned before Gilda gave her a gentle rib. She turned to her and the two shared an awkward moment as their eyes locked. Scootaloo hadn’t actually said what she was trying to hide but had said that there was something she was trying to hide.

“I wasn’t joking when I said you too should just hook-up already.” Gilda said, breaking the silence.

“Seriously? That knucklehead?” Scootaloo simply replied. “Just because we’re friends doesn’t mean I like him.”

“Ouch…”

“What?”

“Friendzoned.” Gilda replied as she shifted in her seat across the table from Scootaloo slightly.

“Pff-whatever… what makes you think he’d wanna go out with me anyway?”

“He’s a guy.”

“He’s a jerk.”

“He’s a guy…

“He’s an idiot!”

“Well he IS a guy.”

“You even hear yourself? He insulted me like twenty times, constantly tried to piss me off and even flat out shot me down when you said it the first time. I doubt he even sees me as a girl, let alone a girlfriend.” Scootaloo answered, just brushing off what Gilda had said as trying to get under her skin once more.

“Wow… it’s almost painful how naive you are.” Gilda half laughed. “I kinda feel sorry for him. Going out of his way ta get your attention; the ringtone, the stories, the shared interests. Heck, if it wasn’t with his mom I’d say it was romantic he offered you a ride home.”

“He didn’t though.”

“Yeah. He did.” Gilda stated.

“You’re totally serious aren’t you?”

“Totally.”

“You’re totally mad aren’t you?...”

“Totally.” Gilda laughed. She got quiet for a moment before continuing with “Trust me, he’s absolutely into you, so c’mon. What’ve you got against him?” Scootaloo just stared at Gilda, clearly trying to figure out a reason why not. Truth was, she couldn’t think of one. “He’s your best guy friend right?”

“Well… yeah, but that’s just ‘cause he’s my only guy friend.” Scootaloo justified.

“Ah huh. You his only female friend too?” she asked, completely breaking Scootaloo’s own argument. “Hfft, thought so. Listen, trust me on this one. If I had half the balls I got now when I was his age I’d have asked out my crush too. Hell, I did pretty much everything he’s doing and she didn’t notice.”

“I just…” Scootaloo began but was interrupted.

“Unless he was right. You don’t like dick.” Gilda half smirked and half cringed paraphrasing Rumble’s words from earlier. “So is this a date after all then? Hope you’re paying for my meal then. I ain’t no cheap thrill after all!” Gilda mocked, completely forgetting about the little incident paying for lunch had already caused.

“I don’t like him alright!” Scootaloo yelled and slammed a hand onto the table. Gilda was actually taken aback by the outburst and just locked eyes with Scootaloo for a couple of seconds in silence. After that though Scootaloo realised what she’d just done and took a quick look around. Luckily there didn’t appear to be anyone staring at her. Other than Gilda of course. “I don’t wanna go out with him okay?”

Gilda tried to sound soothing as she told her “Yeah, sure thing Scootaloo.” but it still sounded a little sarcastic.

“I know I should like him but I don’t. He’s like, perfect for me but I don’t feel anything for him. I want to but… I don’t.” Scootaloo told her friend. It was obviously a sore topic, and one Gilda had accidently pressed far further than she should’ve.

“C’mon, you say it as if you have to like him or something.”

“Don’t put too much into this, it’s not that I like girls or anything. It’s just that… I don’t know that I like guys either. Like, I’m numb or something. I mean, I don’t feel numb or anything emo like that. It’s just how I’d describe not liking people.” Scootaloo said as she looked away and out the window at nothing in particular, just away from Gilda.

“So? You’re asexual.”

“A sexu-”

“I swear to Celestia if you say ‘a sexual what?’ I’m going to punch you.”

“-what?... like, like the reproduction method? I’m pretty sure I don’t asexually create a clone of me.” Scootaloo questioned, legitimately having no idea what Gilda was on about.

“It means neither. You like neither.” Gilda clarified. “It’s like gay, straight, bi and a. There’s one for the other three, you never thought nothing was an option?”

“I… guess. I just, I don’t know.” she said. It wasn’t in a sad tone or anything, it actually sounded more factual than anything else.

“Relax, I’ve been there. Confused about who you are and blah blah blah… listen, here’s what I want you to do. Next time you see Rumble, Monday right? When you see him on Monday, just walk right up to him, go in for a pash and ask him out. Hell, if I’m right, and I am, he’ll ask you out instead.”

“I…”

“Alright, how’s this. I’m gonna call you on Thursday. If you aren’t dating him by then, then you and me are going to the gay bar night again… on a date!”

“Are you asking me out?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Is… is this a date right now?”

“We’ve been over this already but sure… if you want it to be.” she said, wiggling an eyebrow seductively. “Just man up and do it!”

“You’re not a good person Gilda…”

“Never said I was.”

I Hate Mondays

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So turns out the person she’d asked to cover for her on Saturday hadn’t shown up for work and now Gilda was in the shit. She was a little pissed off at Scootaloo but more pissed off on that slacker Lightning Dust for not filling in for her like she’d asked. It wasn’t that big of a deal, all that really happened was she’d gotten stuck with the early shift because of it. 3am to 3pm. The day had been long and tiring but it was finally over as Gilda headed towards the car park.

~ ~

The day had been long and tiring but it was finally over. Mondays suck. To top it all off, Scootaloo still hadn’t said much to Rumble beyond ‘hey’ the entire day. She’d planned too. As much as she didn’t want to she knew she should. At the very least they could clear the air between the two of them and tell each other how they actually felt. Hell, for all she knew Rumble wasn’t romantically interested in her at all.

Rumble, Scootaloo and a few of their other friends all walked out of the front gate towards the pick up spot, waiting for their lifts. None of them had... well actually one of them had a license, just no car to go with it. As usual Scootaloo and Rumble were waiting on her dad for a lift just like every other Monday. And like every other Monday, and every other weekday for that matter, he wouldn’t be there until about 3:30, another twenty odd minutes.

The group split off as everyone began to leave. A small amount of time passed and eventually the last few of their friends left as their bus arrived, leaving just the two of them sitting alone together on a small log fence. Of course that was the norm for Scootaloo and Rumble and was usually absolutely fine. Today however, it was just awkward. At least for Scootaloo. Rumble was blissfully unaware that today was any different to any other day.

“Hey.” Scootaloo turned to Rumble and asked.

“Yeah?” he replied, turning to meet her in turn.

“What are we doing here?”

“That’s one of life’s great mysteries…” he said as he turned back forwards and stared off into the sky. “Why are we here? Are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or, is there really a god… watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don’t know man, but it keeps me up at night.” he answered. completely stunning Scootaloo in the process.

“...” Scootaloo was speechless. The only thing that eventually came to her minds was “What?” as Rumble turned back, looking towards Scootaloo once more. They stayed like that for a few moments as traffic passed by them. Including a totally bitching white motorbike with purple highlightings that both of them would have drooled over had they seen it go past.

“Huh?”

“I mean what are WE doing? Us. Like-" Scootaloo began but was distracted by a loud crash and scraping sound. She turned towards the sound. There was a bike, and an expensive high end one at that, just dumped on the the ground and someone coming towards them from it as the person fidgeted with their helmet strap getting it undone. The person, a woman, hadn’t crashed had they? Why else would you scratch up your ride like that so carelessly?

Before Scootaloo, or Rumble, could figure out any of this the helmet came flying in their direction. It didn’t come anywhere close to hitting them but it was a scare nonetheless. “What the fuck?!” Gilda yelled as they both got to see who had been riding that bike. “How old are you?!” she yelled at Scootaloo, even though she was just as pissed off at Rumble next to her too.

Scootaloo was taken aback by the question at first. Then it clicked with her: both she and Rumble, and every other student out front of her school where in their uniforms still. And Gilda had figured out what that meant. “W-wait, Gilda, I can explain…”

“I said how oLD ARE YOU!?!?!?” she started off calmly but graduated into full on yelling mid sentence.

“Sixteen.” Scootaloo muttered.

“Sixteen?!” Gilda shouted back as she came to a stop in front of Scootaloo who was still sitting on the fence. She reached out and grabbed her ‘friend’ by the scruff of her uniform and pulled her forwards, standing her up. “Do you know how much shit I could be in for this? I fucking kissed you for fuck sake! By Luna, if we had fucked that night I could fucking go to jail you dumb bitch!” Gilda yelled as she pushed Scootaloo back and over the fence.

She landed hard on her back with the lower half of her legs still dangling over the fence at the knee, making it hard for her to get back up. And if she’d thought about it at the time, kinda embarrassing too seems her uniform had a skirt. Luckily though attention was taken off of her as Rumble stood up and came to her defence yelling “What the hell are you doing?!”

“What the hell do you think?” she yelled back, fighting hard to resist the urge to punch this arrogant little twat. Instead she just hit him in a much worse way. “I found your fucking little girlfriend here in a gay bar and got further with her in one night than you have in however many years you’ve known her!” she shouted right into his face. He didn’t flinch to his credit but his gaze softened after he realised what she'd just said.

“Gilda!” shouted Scootaloo as she managed to pull herself back up over the fence. As she got to her feet Gilda turned back to her from Rumble. Again she grabbed Scootaloo by the scruff of her collar once more. This time however Scootaloo was prepared to fight back. She didn't have to though as Gilda was pulled away from her by a man who then stepped in between the two of them.

“What the hell are you doing to my daughter!” he yelled at this woman who to him just looked like a punk in a leather jacket and dyed hair as he took a defencive stance.

Gilda shook off the shove at turned back to Scootaloo’s father. They both scowled at each other for a moment before she made eye contact back with Scootaloo. At this the man took a step forward and was clearly ready to fight. She looked back at him then towards Rumble who was just as ready. As much of a badass as Gilda thought she was, she’d seen Scootaloo fight and these two other guys on top of that...

She tilted her head slightly and shook with rage before forcefully wiping her face of sweat. She turned and walked away, going off and grabbing her helmet. The three of them stayed at the ready as Gilda walked back towards her bike and picked it up off the ground. It was covered in scratch marks down the side it had been dumped on, along with a couple of scuff marks on her helmet but Gilda didn’t pay notice to any of them.

She simply got on her bike and turned the ignition. Holding it with one hand, she moved the straps of her helmet and readied to put it on. Before she did however she called out “Your daughter has a fake ID, she’s been drinking too.” then threw her helmet on her head, revved the bike and broke the speed limit in about a second as she rode of.

She had to get out of there. Not because she couldn’t take them, not because she was worried about being arrested for various things involving minors apparently, and not because she thought she’d won with that last line. But because when she’d wiped her face of sweat…

She was really wiping away her tears.

Bar Cruel

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She idly sipped away at her drink, one arm folded as she leant against the bar. Gilda had been here for a good two hours now and the usually joyful atmosphere was horrible tonight. It was still as colourful as ever, both literally and metaphorically since the rainbow banners were out tonight. It just sucked for her seeing those two dudes dancing together to no music and another couple of girls giggling over in their booth out of the corner of her eye.

There were a few singles here too but Gilda was in no mood to try and pick them up. After all, her last attempt at doing that had ended so well. The bartender offered her a refill on her still half full drink. It was just a way for him to charge her full price for only half a drink. She scoffed but accepted. The guy grabbed her glass and walked off to the other end of the bar before returning with a full glass. New drink in hand, she took a small sip and began the process all over.

Gilda hadn’t been expecting it, but was a little grateful when it happened, as someone pulled out the stool next to her. “I was kinda hoping I wouldn’t find you here.” Scootaloo said as she pulled up a seat beside the older woman. Gilda didn’t respond though, she just kept on looking forwards as she swirled her drink slightly before taking another, albeit bigger, sip.

“So what’ll it be? Cider?” the bartender asked a few seconds after she’d sat down. He was the same guy who’d been here three weeks ago and remembered the birthday girl. Or what he thought was one at least.

Scootaloo thought for a moment before she replied. However before she could get a single word out Gilda raised as a hand in front of her face “She’s not drinking.” as she turned towards Scootaloo and scowled, hoping to just get her out of here without having to out the girl’s age.

“R-right… just a, a rootbeer please.” Scootaloo added as Gilda lowered her hand from her face. The bartender nodded and walked off, leaving Gilda to just groan and shake her head along side it. Scootaloo obviously wasn’t getting the hint. “So… I guess I should say sorry, huh?”

“You think…” Gilda said as she swished her drink around. Well at least Gilda was talking to her. She then turned to Scootaloo and asked “Actually, how the hell, no, why the hell did you get an ID with your birthday the day you got it?” she demanded, trying to at least find some humor in this messed up situation.

“Well, uh… I actually got it a few months ago. I just kinda messed up the years. It was meant to say a year earlier but…” she stopped and Gilda laughed. It wasn’t a ‘that’s a good joke’ laugh, more of a ‘you’re an idiot’ kind of laugh. And Scootaloo couldn’t exactly argue with it either. “Tss, yeah laugh it up. It wasn’t even the worst part. No, that was finding out I wound up at a gay bar the night it turned.”

“Yeah… probably should’ve mentioned that.” the bartender said as he returned with her drink. “Not trying to generalise or nothing but I sort of assumed you knew.” he said, looking the girl up and down. Both of them turned just stared him down. “Uh… gingerale’s on the house.” he said trying to just get out of there. Even he could feel the tension in the air.

“I ordered a rootbeer.” Scootaloo replied as he placed the drink down in front of her.

“It’s the same thing.” he said as he walked away, completely blowing Scootaloo’s mind in the process. I mean, it makes sense, she’d just never thought about it… anyway.

Gilda took another sip of her drink, having now quickly emptied half of it already. It had taken her nearly an hour to drink the two half glasses she’d ordered before Scootaloo had shown up, now she’d gone through just as much in a matter of minutes. Maybe not even that long. “Listen Squirt. You got your free drink, now just get out of here alright? You're throwing off my game. Non one's gonna come over here with you sitting right beside me, looking like a couple.” she said and absent mindedly took another sip of gin and juice.

“Some game you’ve got… no one’s gonna come up to you whether I’m here or not.” Scootaloo said smugly.

“What the hell does that mean?” she growled.

“I… I’ve been here a while.” admitted Scootaloo. “I got here about forty minutes ago, and I’ve been watching you from outside for ages. Just trying to work up the guts to come over here I guess. You’re up here at the bar and yet I’m the only person who’s come up to you the whole night.” Scootaloo took a sip if her drink, much like had Gilda had been nursing her own. “Huh… it is the same.” she said before taking another quick nip.

“Really?” Gilda asked begrudgingly. “You pulled that shit from before, then come in here and that’s all you got ta say? Fucking insult me and then make some stupid joke about a drink!?” she only just managed to hold herself back from shouting this at the younger woman.

“Hey, I said sorry alright. That’s all I can do” Scootaloo tried to defend herself.

Gilda was torn. Half of her wanted to storm off out of the pub. The other half wanted to deck Scootaloo then and there. And the latter was almost about to win out as she reach over and grabbed Scootaloo by her jacket, for the first time not caring that it was a Wonderbolts one and tugging on it hard enough that if it wasn’t leather most dumb fabrics would’ve ripped. “You. Fucking. Didn’t.” she stated word by word right into Scootaloo’s face. “You said you GUESS you should say sorry.”

“I… I…” Scootaloo stutter with Gilda’s omnipresent presence feeling like she was completely surrounded by it. “I’m sorry.” she told her friend. Hopefully still friend. “Look, I know I messed things up a little. Okay, maybe a lot, but I’m really sorry alright? I am. I don’t know if it even really means anything to you but I am. I really am sorry.”

Gilda’s scowl held, as did her hold on Scootaloo’s jacket. “Yeah. Well… it does.” she said and released her grip. She turned back towards the bar, grabbed her drink and downed the rest in one big swig. Slamming the glass back down on the table, she clenched her eyes and shook her head. “Yucky-ya!”

“So… we cool?”

“Yeah… I guess. More than I got from the last friend I got in a fight with.” she told Scootaloo before raising her glass again and getting a piece of ice to chew on out of it. With an audible crunch Scootaloo shuddered just thinking about doing that herself. “I’m sorry too for losing it back there on Monday.”

“Hope so… half the school thinks I’m gay now. So does my dad…” Scootaloo sighed. “Not that there’s anything wro-”

“Pff-haha… geez you’re uptight about that stuff” Gilda chuckled. And even if it was a Scootaloo’s expense, it made her happy to hear it. This wasn’t a ‘you’re an idiot’ laugh… well it kinda was still. But it was a joyous laugh coming from Gilda this time instead. “What about the other half of the school then?”

“Yeah, half the school are like ‘Oh she’s totally gay’. the other half though are like ‘Who's Scootaloo?’. And the other half…”

“Other other half?”

“Shut up. But good point, ALLL of them are like ‘Oh yeah her, she’s cool, hooking up with an older girl, yeah, totally a milf-hunter.’ all of them said. Literally all of them. In those EXACT words.”

“...”

“I know right?”

“I really have no idea what the hell to say to that.” Gilda just gazed at her stunned which was returned with just a big goofy-dumb smile. “How the hell did I not figure it out… the signs were everywhere.” Gilda sighed. “So everyone thinks you're gay huh? What about Rumble, he still think you like dick?” Gilda both mocked and legitimately asked. Admittedly, Gilda may’ve gone a little overboard when she found out but the only thing she regretted were her words to Rumble that day.

“He suckerpunched me in the gut.” Scootaloo deadpanned.

“He hit you?!” Gilda blurted in a tone filled with accusation.

“Don’t say it like that. Yeah, he hit a girl.” Scootaloo retorted. Her own tone sarcastic and showing she didn’t hold it against him. That changed though as she continued with “I can’t blame him really. I… think I hurt him more.” this peaked Gilda’s interest. From the first half she’d thought Scootaloo had just been victim blaming herself. With the second half though, she got the feeling she’d been right about him.

“So he freaked out about it.” Gilda stated as she, without thinking, moved her glass towards her mouth to take a drink. Only to find it empty. She lowered it and without a bit of booze she’d wanted to ease the guilt she asked “That’s my fault isn’t it?”

Scootaloo held off answering at first but after a brief paused she told Gilda the truth, even if it wasn’t the answer her friend wanted. “Yeah. It was.” she said, which lead to another long pause in their conversation. “I knew he liked me and never said anything. I think he was the only person who didn’t think I wasn’t gay before this… even my dad.” she added, rolling her eyes. “‘Course could’ve been because I had no interest in boys either. But he… he still believed me.”

“Wait, so if he still believed you, why the hell’d he punch ya then?”

“I don’t know. I guess… I guess because he doesn’t anymore. I’m ‘outed’ in front of everyone thanks to you, and then suddenly... I ask him out. I asked how he felt about me first but… he must’ve just thought I was using him to cover it up. He just couldn’t take that. And I sure as hell can’t blame him for it. He liked me, maybe even loved me, and to him, All I wanted from him was something fake. So yeah… he slugged me in the stomach.”

“Geez… sorry.” Gilda said before adding. “Crap… I can’t say sorry… sounds too lame compared to your one. But yeah, sorry.” she told Scootaloo. It may not have sounded as heart-felt as the last apology but it most certainly had been. “So… things alright between you two?”

“Dunno. Haven’t spoken to ‘im since Monday…” Scootaloo said. It hadn’t happened yet, but Gilda could see as Scootaloo looked forwards that her eyes were watering. There wasn’t anything she could say to help here. So she didn’t. Instead she just put a hand out and rested it on Scootaloo’s shoulder. Scootaloo turned to Gilda and despite trying to hold it back, a tear managed to escape. “Thanks…” she said, trying to force her voice to not break and her lip to not quiver.

“Yeah… no problem.” she replied. They stayed like that for while. Looking at each other with Gilda’s hand on Scootaloo’s shoulder, trying to comfort her.

“What would you’ve done if I believed you?” Scootaloo asked out of nowhere.

“Believe what?”

“Your line about having the wrong number.”

“I’d have called back and laughed at you. Duh.” Gilda replied with a scoff.

“How, you don’t have my number.” Scootaloo countered.

“Uh, you just called me. I got your number in my history.”

“What if I had a private number?”

“Do you?”

“That’s not the point. The point’s what if.”

“I don’t know. We wouldn’t have met up and none of this would’ve happened. That the answer you’re looking for?” Gilda said with a frown. “Wouldn’t have run into Rumble on Saturday. Probably wouldn’t have recognised you out fronta the school. Wouldn’t have even been driving past there at that time.”

“That’s not what I want… I kinda do but, no.” Scootaloo moaned. “You think Rumble’ll forgive me?”

“If he doesn’t he’s an idiot… of course he’s an idiot already so hmm, who knows?” Gilda laughed slightly. Thankfully, it got a mild chuckle out of Scootaloo too. “Hey, give me your phone again.”

“Why?” she asked as she began to reach for her phone in her pocket.

“Do you trust me?” replied Gilda as she put her still-gloved hand out for it.

“No.” Scootaloo retorted, having been just about to hand her the phone before pulling back a little bit now.

“Good answer. But do it anyway.” she said, snatching the phone away from Scootaloo. In fairness though, Scootaloo didn’t exactly stop Gilda from taking it.

“I’ve called him already if that’s what you're trying to do. He hasn’t picked up and he just ignored or walked away whenever I tried in person.” Scootaloo told her friend. Right as she finished saying that however, the phone was shoved back in her face with a display showing a the sent message of ‘you think your the the only one who got hurt here? i fuckign hurt too u no. u wont even talk too me now? welll fukc you!!!’.

Send.

Bad Things Come in Two's

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“What the hell Gilda?!”

Scootaloo grabbed the phone away from her and desperately tried to figure out how to unsend a message. Spoilers: you can’t. “Congratulations. You’ve just sent your first drunk text.” Gilda laughed.

“I did not send that!” she half-shouted before trying to quickly call Rumble’s phone. She was surprised… he actually answered.

“Hey Scootaloo.” Rumble’s voice made her jump. It was downtrodden and though she didn’t know it herself, matched Scootaloo’s own of late.

“Hey, Rumble. Listen, I’m sorry about that text. I just-”

“No. You’re right… I-I’m an arse. I’m sorry for punching you and, well, being a dick. Tell ya what. Free shot. Anywhere you want… just please not in the nuts.” he said. And Scootaloo honestly didn’t know if he was joking or not.

“No, that’s alright. I’m sorry too. I know you like me but… I just don’t feel the same, you know? I get it, it’s gotta suck to hear but, we can still be f-” she began but was cut off.

“Don’t you dare fucking say ‘we can still be friends’!” he yelled over the phone.

“Y-you don’t want to…”

“No, no! I want to be friends… I just don’t want to hear that BS coming from you. Seriously, how do you not know those are like the most crushing words a chick can say to a guy?”

“Right… my bad.” Scootaloo laughed. They both did. They were both hurt, but they were both tough. But most importantly, they were both able to laugh about it.

To Gilda it was probably the best outcome she could’ve hoped for for the two of them. She drowned out the rest of the conversation between the two of them from there out, knowing that they were fine. And that she hadn’t caused a repeat of herself and one of her old friends.

“... Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow. Alright, see ya.” was the last thing Scootaloo said before they both hung up. Gilda turned back to her friend afterwards, just in time her be lunged at as Scootaloo hugged Gilda tightly. “Thank you.” Scootaloo said softly. Gilda tried to return the hug but couldn’t as her own arms were pinned down from it. Instead she just flailed her hands and managed to tap them against Scootaloo’s thigh while gasping for air. “Oh, sorry ‘bout that.” Scootaloo said as she released the older girl.

“Tss, no prob.” Gilda replied awkwardly. She was too tough to admit it but everyone loves a good hug.

“Can I ask you something Gilda?”

“No…” Gilda replied sarcastically with a look that said ‘What do you think?...’.

“Where’d you get that sweet bike anyway?” Scootaloo asked. All she’d seen from that night she’d spent at her place was a lime-green jalopy.

“I’ve had that for a few years. What, you think that junker was my main car? Ha!”

“Where was it, and why didn’t you give me a lift on that thing then?”

“Only had one helmet. And it was in there with the car. What’d you think was under that tarp? A barbecue? And guess what. I got a new helmet for it like two weeks ago. If you’d come back ta the mall with me instead of bitching out and getting the bus I’d have given you a ride home on it too.

“Really?!”

“No. I still only have one helmet…” Gilda lied with a laugh. Scootaloo just shook her head and smiled slightly.

“Were you really that mad you’d just dump it on the ground? Looked like ya scratched the paint to hell on it.”

“Na. I’ve crashed that thing more than I’ve ridden it.”

“Starting to be glad I didn’t get a lift with you.” Scootaloo said as she reached for the drink that she’d forgotten about for around fifteen minutes now. It was warming but still fine and she drank most of it in one go, not having realised how thirsty and dry-mouthed all of this had made her.

And now she was just sitting there. Everything that needed to be said between them had been said at this point. There wasn’t really much left. Not to mention that her dad expected her home by ten. And yes, he knew exactly where she was. Kids will drink. Who cares? At least it would keep her from harder stuff like injecting marijuanas. Honestly, Scootaloo hadn’t done anything he hadn’t done herself when she was younger. Well, technically Scootaloo had gotten a fake ID good enough to ACTUALLY fool someone. Gilda hadn’t...

“Well…” Scootaloo said as she finished her gingerale off and turned to stand up from the bar. “I’m going ta head home… got school tomorrow.” she said with a chuckle that made Gilda just shake her head slightly. With that she stood up and began to leave.

Before she got more than a step away though, Gilda reach out and grabbed her arm. “You know… you don’t have to go just yet. Stay for a bit longer, alright.” Gilda said, even though it was more of a question.

“You know I can’t drink right?” Scootaloo asked.

“I know that. You know that. He doesn’t.”

“Hahaha… good point. Alright, I can stay for a while longer.” Scootaloo said before she retook her seat and turned to face Gilda. They both smiled at one another before Gilda turned to the bartender and waved him over and said...

“This round’s on me.”



The end.

Bonus Chapter

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The three of them moaned and groaned on the ground. Those two girls they’d tried to mug had beaten the living crap out of them. As the first began to get up, he looked over at his two friends, one of which was clutching his balls. The other clutching his nose. And he himself had a sizable welt on the side of his face from the larger girl’s initial punch.

“Uh… I think my nose is broken…” the guy groaned as he managed to get to his feet, leaving a slightly bloody hand print on the ground as he did. He’s expected to get in a bit of a tussle with the bigger of those two but hadn’t expected the smaller girl to elbow him like that.

“Guys… guys… I can’t feel one of them. I think she popped it!” the man still on the ground holding his crotch said in a panic.

“You only HAVE one bollock Gavin…” the first guy said. “Fuckign bitch stole 90 bits from me!” he said as he looked around for his wallet. He finally found it teetering at the edge of a water drain. The side of his face was starting he heat and swell up as he walked over to it muttering “Hope the bitch is at least getting laid for playing the hero and ‘saving’ the girl from us.” knowing that if you’re attacked and you save the girl you are totally getting some that night.

He reach down for his wallet and accidently knocked it down the drain… “That’s the last time I do Gilda a favour.”