Some pony has gotten terribly mixed up, Twilight finds her self in a very odd situation, she has an eglae's claw, a lion's paw and a snake tail. As for their original owners situation lets just say it's very hard for him to snap his &a
After a poorly timed visit from a creature of chaos inevitably goes astray, Twilight finds her world turned upside down and Discord is flabbergasted to find his world making far too much sense. With Celestia and Luna both away on royal business, the pair must figure out how to fix the dilemma they find themselves in.
The air under the Golden Oaks Library was charged with magic, devices hummed and clicked as the arcane power drove them to new heights of calculation. Vials of different chemicals bubbled and simmered, before being mixed, changed and analysed. In the centre of this creative dance of power the world's newest alicorn ordered this complex dance of discovery.
With steady levitation and a critical eye the purple pony slowly tipped the ingredient into an awaiting beaker, carefully produced glass stirring wand and noted down the changes in the colour, texture and magical properties of the new concoction. The liquid within slowly transformed from its clear green to a cloudy pink as the two compounds mixed together under the tender care of the methodical pony.
It was not uncommon for Twilight Sparkle to secret herself away for hours on end when a particular notion or idea would grab her mind. It was obvious to every pony who knew Twilight and her over active mind strove for order and understanding. Spike her faithful dragon assistant had not seen the mare for more than a few minutes each day for breakfast as she poured over this latest mystery that had caught her attention.
Twilight was close to a breakthrough, she just knew it. Everything she had read pointed to a simple solution to the problem, that was still beyond her grasp vexed her terribly. Books were amazing things and Twilight wanted to keep them that way. Her enemy this day was time once again, time and use. She despaired as it stole the life from her books, its touch would slowly weather their beautiful covers and Twilight shuddered to think of the harm done by those who borrowed them.
She had a mission, nay a quest to find a way of keeping her books in prime condition. Twilight had tried locking them away from clumsy hooves, but the futility of such plan a became clear after the mayor gently ushered Twilight away from the magical vault she was constructing and explained, contrary to Twilight's belief that the Library wasn't just for her own use.
Spike watched this current obsession unfold from a safe distance, cooking pot helmet and cushion armour in place. This had been triggered by an honest mistake by Daisy only a few days ago. The innocent mare, not knowing her peril had come to the Golden Oak to find a simple tome to deal with a strange breed of root fly. Twilight had only been to happy to help, presenting a number of books with possible solutions. Everything had been fine until Daisy went to leave with the suggested work.
"Oh you can't possibly mean to take it with you, I only just finished cataloguing the herbology section and that would throw off my schedule. I need to reorder the 'magical dynamics collection' and if you remove 'Pests and Precautions', then it will throw off my system," Twilight had informed Daisy with a slight eye twitch.
The pink pony took a hesitant step back from twilight and produced a brittle smile, "But princess, I need to solve this problem quickly and I have to get back home, can't I just borrow it just this once?"
Twilight visibly shuddered at the word 'princess', "No-no-no, you miss understand, I need to make sure everything is perfect, as 'princess' I have a duty to bring order to the realm. If you take that book away then I can't finish sorting out herbology. I simply can't allow it, as I said it will throw off months of preparations."
Daisy looked blankly at Twilight; her mane ‘poinged’ as a number of hairs curled out of place and she couldn't fail to notice the glazed look in Twilight's eyes. "Um, begging your pardon princess, but aren't Libraries meant to lend out their books?"
The 'princess' word caused another spasm to flow over Twilight again and her teeth began to grind. "Why of course they do, b-b-but this time I need that book to stay here: I have a schedule to work with you see, otherwise two years from now I will find myself short of time to order Spikes birthday present."
Spike shook his head: This problem had been getting slowly worse for weeks after Twilight became a princess. At first his dear friend and big sister had enjoyed exploring the new power of flight, all the new options open to her, but this had been eclipsed by Twilight's growing concern over her royal duties. Spike feared that book hoarding was just another symptom of that underlying problem.
Daisy, rightfully concerned made a move for the door, but still clutched the book in her hoof. In a flash of magic, Twilight yanked the book back and the unthinkable had happened: One of her beloved books tore apart. It had been a simple accident, but Twilight's world came crashing down to the sound of ripping paper.
Daisy had been fine, but Twilight had thrown herself into her new 'quest' with vigour, leaving Spike to deal with the day to day running of the Library, which in some ways came as a relief for him. This kept Twilight out from under his feet and she only needed the occasional sandwich to keep her happy.
Here and now, Spike watched Twilight's futile efforts to keep her books 'safe forever' and sighed. He was hoping Twi would snap out of this latest mental break down soon. Her friends have of course rushed to her aid, but to no avail. None of them knew the first thing about being a princess and though, Rarity, Rainbow, Applejack, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie had all done their best to re-balance Twilight in their own way, all had met with only limited success, before Twilight would immerse herself in her work once more.
Spike would have sought help from the other princesses, but they were all in delicate negotiations at the moment. Twilight's change had given rise to more than a few political ramifications. Spike didn't understand it all, nor did he even try to, he just concentrated on making his big sister the best honey grass sandwich he could and resolved to deal with the other possible problems later. Spike was determined to be supportive and watch over Twilight as she got this out of her system.
As he carried his latest creation down the stairs to the buzzing laboratory, Spike saw that Twilight was still in the throes of her work. A number of burnt, mangled and ruined 'test' pamphlets were scattered about the floor. The small dragon looked out from his improvised armour at the host of destroyed reading material.
"Hi Twi, I made you a special this time," Spike informed Twilight with a nervous cough.
"Mhm" was the only reply he received from Twilight, her focus totally on the reaction taking place before her. With care she dipped another pamphlet into the cloudy mixture and watched its results. Nothing could be seen inside the beaker, but the room filled with the smell of bananas and mothballs.
Twilight sighed as she withdrew the paper using her magic, noting how it was now covered in fine layers of pink fur."Urgh, why didn't it work?" She called in frustration and tossed the paper away, which upon landing began to crawl away like a caterpillar.
Spike, unperturbed by this strange sight neatly stepped over the retreating fuzz and placed the plate next to Twilight on her desk. "Honey grass surprise, I thought I would try something new," Spike's little fanged mouth forming a brittle smile.
Twilight just gave another "mhm", closely studying the formula she was quickly rewriting, "Add the powdered 'Poison Joke' after the ground crystal, stir anti-clock wise four times, add 'Purtoc' Root' and stir clock wise three times....." The list went on and on and Spike’s head hurt after the first few lines.
"Well I..er hope you like it Twilight, just call me if there is anything you need and your number one assistant will be here right away," With that Spike bowed and hurried back up to the relative safety of the main floor.
Without even looking at the contents, Twilight levitated the sandwich up to her mouth for a bite, "You know, he really is a dedicated little reptile isn't he." The voice oozed out of the air and caused Twilight to lose focus. The floating collection of items dipped in their lazy path around the basement for only a fraction of a second and Twilight narrowed her eyes, she knew that voice.
"Discord, what are you doing here?" Twilight asked in an impatient voice, she didn't bother looking around, the draconequus could be anywhere and she wasn't in the mood for his games right now.
"Why you wound me Twilight, I came to see how you were doing of course; Fluttershy was in such a state after you threw her out over nothing, I came to see if I could help 'fix' things. It took a moment for Twilight to discover that the voice was coming from the sandwich. Looking down she saw that the bread had sprouted an antler and goat horn: It seemed to be looking at her without any eyes.
"I didn't throw her out Discord, I just asked her politely to leave me in peace as I am doing very important research," Twilight replied with a defensive manner, "I would like to ask you to do the same, I have no time for your nonsense now Discord."
"Aww but your friends are all worried about you Twilight, you have been giving them all the cold shoulder for a while now, ever since you became a 'princess'," the sandwich said, with what may have actually been genuine concern. The word ‘princess’ caused Twilight to shiver again.
"Go away Discord," Twilight said in a frustrated tone, lowering the sandwich and grabbing a number of vials to begin her experiment anew.
"Now I know there is something troubling you 'princess', it's not like you to be so rude to anyone," This time the grinning face of the mad creature looked out at Twilight from the cloudy pink failure she was about to dispose of, "Besides, how could I go when you’re achieving some truly fascinating results here?"
The pink furry pamphlet rose into view in a glowing aura and did it's best to lick Twilight with a small tongue. Twilight ruffled her wings and narrowed her eyes once again.
"Go-way-Discord, you’re causing everything here to go out of balance, no wonder this experiment went wrong," She said through gritted teeth.
"Aww, how can you say that this 'little fella' is wrong?" Discord flashed into existence and the tall creature had to stoop to fit his body into the basement. He was holding the 'fuzzy' in his lion paw and stroked it with his other mismatched limb as the small furry bundle made a strange 'cooing' sound.
"You're making some fine chaos and didn't invite me? Shame on you 'princess', you know how much I enjoy such things and I am always happy to lend a claw," Discord was curled around the various items in Twilight's lab, being sure not to disrupt anything.
Twilight's eye twitched again, before she finally lost her temper. "Discord, get out!" She shouted at the top of her lungs, her horn glowed brighter before the various chemicals and magical items she had been supporting were momentarily forgotten. With a resounding crash they all smashed to the floor at once and there was a massive cloud of multi-coloured smoke and a sizzle of arcane lightning.
Spike heard the commotion from down stairs and rushed away from his cooking, all ideas of desert banished from his mind. That was an explosion and his heart leaped into his throat fearing what Twilight might have done. His adopted sister had been prone to impressive feats of magical power before, but as an alicorn who knew what she might do in the state she was in.
As he skidded out of the kitchen Spike saw the door of the basement had been blown off it’s hinges and smoke pouring out. The haze was coloured in every hue of the rainbow and smelt strongly of mothballs.
"Twilight, Twilight are you alright?" Spike managed to call out before his lungs filled with smoke and he began coughing incessantly.
"I'm okay Spike, just had a small accident, because someone wouldn’t go away." Twilight called up, but Spike thought she sounded odd; her voice had a deeper resonance to it. He dashed over to the window and threw it open, letting in some fresh air. Waving his claw back and forth, Spike took a huge breath before heading back to the basement's door frame. The portal was scorched and soot blackened while the drifting smoke from below obscured his view with it’s rainbow haze.
Spike feared what he might see, but was determined to make sure Twilight was alright and so pushed on regardless. The basement was a mess and smashed glass crunched under foot as Spike wondered around blindly. All of a sudden he saw a large familiar shape looming before him.
"Discord what are you doing here?" Spike cried out, that silhouette all too well known to the small dragon, fumbling in the chaos Spike managed to lay hold of something solid from the floor and brandished it before him. "Twilight where are you?" Spike called out in worry, "Did Discord hurt you?"
The sound of Twilight coughing could be heard, but it still sounded wrong to Spike, who put it down to the muffling effects of the smoke.
"Hang on spike, I'll clear this then we can see what we're doing," Twilight's distorted voice called out, there was a sound of fingers being snapped and the smoke was gone, only to be replaced by to every one’s amazement, hot dogs.
The rain of food lasted for only a second before the room was revealed to Spike. The serpentine form of Discord dominated the centre of the basement and Spike shrank back even as he desperately looked about for Twilight. His sister and friend was nowhere to be seen and as his gaze travelled up to Discord's face his mouth dropped open in disbelief.
"Spike, what's the matter?" Twilight called out, but her voice still sounded wrong, after moment Twilight also realised that something was very odd. She had always been taller than spike, but now the dragon truly seemed tiny before her. As Twilight attempted to stand up straight, she banged her head on the ceiling of the basement causing her to 'growl' in frustration.
Twilight raised a hoof to her head and then froze, no not a hoof but a claw! She looked down at Spike and saw the confusion and fear in his eyes. "Spike?" Was all Twilight could think to say as she only began to notice what Spike had instantly seen. Twilight's voice sounded wrong it was deeper and had odd inflections in it.
"Twilight?" Spike asked, his face trembling with disbelief.
It was at that moment that a pile of wreckage from the ruined laboratory shifted and a groan was heard from within. Both Twilight and Spike turned to see the mound stand up and shake it's self off to reveal a grey and brown mottled pegasus. Twilight looked closer and to her mounting astonishment she saw the stallion wasn't a pegasus as she had first thought. Twilight’s mouth hung open as she registered the long horn sprouting from the pony’s skull.
The newly revealed pony shook his head to clear the tangled brown mane from his eyes. He looked to startled pair and raised an eyebrow. "What, haven't you ever seen a creature of chaos before?" He asked in an annoyed way before seeing the monstrous form of a fellow draconequus looking at him: No, looking down at him.
The draconequus before him was female, she had all the wrong things in the right places and her mixed hues of colours were all shades of purple and black. "Well isn't this a turn up for the books?" Discord said before he too noticed his voice was different. He raised a claw to his throat out of habit and found a solid mass strike his neck. After spluttering from the case of 'self winding' Discord turned his yellow irises down and stared at a grey hoof before him.
"Oh come now, you must be joking right?" Discord said to the world at large. He looked back up to the staring dragon and draconequus, the confusion in their eyes mirroring his own.
Twilight’s eyes were grey with purple miss matched dots for pupils and both were glaring at Discord in a furious manner as she shouted at Discord, her voice making the room shake and a number of the hotdogs sprouted small wings before leaping up to fly lazily in the air, "Discord, what have you done? Change things back right this instant, or by Celestia I'll,....I will".
Discord nodded and went to snap his fingers to change them back, but all that happened was that his horn shone a pale grey and he vanished. There was a jumbled sound from a cupboard from behind Twilight and she spun around to see what had happened only for her now much larger frame to send the few unbroken items in the room crashing to the ground. Twilight leaned back in dismay only to bang her head on the ceiling.
The wooden doors of the cupboard rattled for a moment before coming undone to reveal the upside down form of an alicorn discord upside down looking out from between his back legs. Despite all that had happened Spike couldn't help but crack a smile and before long he was rolling on the floor holding his sides.
Twilight glared at her number one assistant, before turning back to the grey pony before her, "Discord, what have you done? Turn me back this instant!" Her voice was edged with a growl.
After a complicated amount of shuffling and straining sounds Discord finally righted himself, "It seems my dear that, I am unable to do any such thing." The words caused Twilight’s heart to fall and she looked pleadingly at Discord this time.
"You mean I'm stuck like this?" Twilight asked, dread filling her heart.
"You and me both it seems." Discord said,
"But I can't be a draconequus; I'm Celestia's faithful student and good pony, not some crazy miss-mash collection of random monsters," She cried, chocolate tears began to well up and fall to the ground, before they could land they turned into marbles which bounced before rolling away.
"Now that's a bit harsh, I happen to think you make a very striking as a draconequus," Discord assured Twilight and it was true, if he had been in his wrong shape again he would have thought Twilight very pretty indeed.
"That isn't helping Discord," Twilight replied as she mastered herself once more. She would never admit it but Discord didn't look bad as a pony either. Shaking her now much larger head Twilight put ‘that’ idea right out of her mind. Focus Twilight, you can do this, she told herself.
"So can I turn us back then?" Twilight said after a moment.
Discord shrugged at this, "I have no idea."
"What do you mean you have no idea? You turned me into this thing now show me how to fix it," Twilight commanded.
"Now don't blame everything on me, not all random acts of chaos are my fault no matter how much I wish they were, but I can honestly say that I didn't cause this," Discord attempted to wave an admonishing finger at Twilight which only produced an odd hoof wobble, "It seems your experiments have had some unwanted side effects Twilight."
She growled again, and Discord could see how truly intimidating he must have been. The way Twilight loomed over him was very disconcerting.
"You're saying this is my fault?" Twilight bunched both her paw and claw into fists, which only caused a bundle of flowers to appear grasped in each.
"Not at all, I am simply pointing out that accidents do happen, why I would want to be stuck as a pony of all things urgh," Even as a pony Discord had a condescending tone, but to Twilight's surprise she thought she detected an undercurrent of unease now. Discord was worried as well and Twilight suspected that for once he was telling the truth.
"So that's all you have to say about this, that we're both stuck as we are?" Twilight asked in a defeated tone.
Discord nodded, "Well until you figure out how to control the chaos in you, or I learn to control order in me I believe that may be the case," He was studying his cutie mark, which seemed to be a picture of burning ice.
Spike had stopped laughing as the truth of the situation sunk in, "Surely Celestia or Luna would know what to do? The hope in his voice made Twilight smile.
"They may do spike, but they’re not back for three weeks, magical communication if prohibited under the negotiations treaty and by the time a courier could reach them, they would be on their way back any way," Twilight's face screwed up in a way that Spike knew even if she was a draconequus now. Her mind was working things out and didn't like what conclusions they were coming too.
"It may be were going to have to just ride this one out Spike, It's only a few weeks, what could go wrong in that time?" Twilight reasoned to herself. She sat down on her second try, her new legs not so differently built from her own natural ones. The tail gave Twilight some trouble however. She was forced to lift this appendage and let it wave back and forth. As Twilight sat there and continued to work out what to do, her tail coiled and spun as if with a mind of it’s own.
"That's all well and good Twilight, I trust you," Spike said as his attention turned to Discord who was trying to pick up a broken chemical vial with a hoof with no success, "It's him I am worried about, who knows what he might get up to."
"Hmm your right Spike", Twilight agreed as Discord failed for the third time to pick up the glass with his hoof. He couldn't seem to get the hang of how ponies held things.
"We will just have to keep an eye on him too and make sure he doesn't do anything too dangerous. We need somewhere for him to stay, me too for that matter," Twilight said: Her shock at the situation be subsumed the urge to plan and organise, "I can't stay here like this, the other ponies will never understand."
There was another thoughtful pause and Twilight snapped her fingers "Aha, I am sure Fluttershy will be okay with him staying with her, she's his friend after all."
Spike didn't look convinced, "I don't know Twilight, that could cause some very odd questions to be asked."
"Nonsense Spike, I'll just explain everything to the mayor, she's an intelligent pony,” Twilight said, sounding much happier now she had a planned course of action, "Um I will just say he's a distant cousin of Celestia's."
Spike still looked doubtful, "If you say so Twilight, but you can't just walk up to the town hall looking like you do and I think you need to learn to control your magic before you do."
Twilight gave Spike a confused look and then followed his gaze to the floor where all the hotdogs had begun dancing a merry jig. Twilight looked at her claw with wide eyes as she realised it had done chaos magic with her knowing it.
"You're of course right Spike, first I need you to write some letters to the others, they will need to know what’s going on," Twilight paused for a moment as an interesting idea occurred to her. "You know what; I think I should write it."
Spike watched Twilight snake around the room, her movements were far from the graceful as way Discord normally managed, but she didn’t break anything else this time. Twilight would need much more practice with her increased size and new centre of gravity before she was confident. After a few stumbles she eventually rummaged in a few draws and produced out a quill along with some parchment. "Right," Twilight announced in a triumphant way.
Spike watched Twilight sit down and begin her first attempts at writing with her own 'hands'. He dragon felt a twinge of unease again, that had always been his job and he felt he had somehow been cheated. Spike turned away from Twilight and watched Discord once again.
The alicorn had given up trying to pick up items with his hoof and now looked up, eyes almost crossing at his horn. "So this is the business end right, how do I make it work?"
Spike looked confused, "didn't you already use it, I mean you teleported into a cupboard just now?"
"So I did," Discord replied and his face screwed up in concentration, which reminded Spike oddly of Twilight again. After a short moment his horn flickered into life.
The effect was impressive and very unpredictable, with a flash the broken glass splintered apart, flew back together again before vanishing from sight. There was the tinkle of smashing glass that echoed from the floor above and Discord turned his mad eyes towards the other two.
Twilight had craned her long neck around to see what Discord was up to and the embarressed alicorn shrugged before Twilight's purple eyed stare and simply said, "Ooopsie"
Applejack was weeding out in the orchard when Spike came running up the lane. Grunting she leaned on the hoe she was using and watched the little dragon as he puffed his way to a stop, resting his clawed hands on his knees as he fought to catch his breath.
"Howdy Spike, what's got yer all in a huff then?" Applejack asked in a friendly way.
Spike raised a claw with one finger extended as he drew in deep breaths, "I.....have....a.....letter for you." He managed to gasp out in between huge gulps of air.
Applejack raised an eye brow, "Must be pretty important fer yer ter come runnin all this way. What's this all about sugar cube?." Spike nodded and produced a small scroll addressed to Applejack.
Her curiosity peaked she opened the letter looked at what was inside, the writing was in Twilight's normal ink and had hints of her style, but it had none of her normal neatness. Above all it was so short.
Applejack, can't explain here, need you at the library as soon as possible.
Twilight.
P.S Make sure spike sees Rarity next
P.S.P.S Bring a plough
Applejack looked up from the letter to the dragon, her mouth open. "Um Spike, why would Twi need ma plough?" He gave one last heaving breath before answering.
"She asked for what?" Spike asked, his face showing confusion.
"Twi says she wants me ter bring a plough. Not just that she want ter make sure ya go ter Rarity next," Applejack explained to Spike's mounting concern.
"Oh that can't be good," Spike said in a cryptic way, "Gotta go; Twilight is timing me". Without another word Spike rushed off towards Rarity's house.
"Spike hang on!" Applejack tried to call him back, but he either didn't hear her or was too intent on his assignment.
It was a similar story for each of Twilight's friends; Spike would arrive and give them a poorly written note before running off again with almost no explanation. Spike had been given Specific instructions about which order to visit Twilight's friends; Applejack was only third on the list and he had a long way to go.
The exhausted Spike collapsed through the door of the Golden Oaks Library and just lay on the floor while the world spun around him. He had done the tour of Ponyville in record time, delivering Twilight's 'hand' written messages one after another. His small chest heaving, Spike dragged himself back to his feet, shut the door behind him and looked around for Twilight.
He managed to wheeze out a "Twi, I'm back," before Spike saw what was different: The books were all gone, every shelf was empty.
"Welcome back Spike, I hope you don't mind but I was getting a little bored so I rearranged things a little," Spike looked directly up to see Twilight coiled across the ceiling of the Library. All the absent books were neatly stacked there in a complicated pattern.
"Um Twilight, are you feeling okay?" Spike asked, suspecting he knew the answer.
"Oh of course spike, I know you think I have gone mad being a draconequus now and all, but it turns out it's just that their minds work a lot faster than a pony's. This does have the unfortunate side effect that their thoughts often bump into each other and get mixed up but I think I can sort it, I am very good at organising as you know," Spike saw her eyes, the pupils had taken on a slightly lopsided aspect.
With a sudden darting motion Twilight was next to spike without seeming to have moved, "Oh spike your twenty three point seven two seconds late. We really need to work on your time keeping now don't we."
"I er..." Spike took a step backwards.
"Oh calm down Spike, she's actually doing very well. I was climbing the walls a good couple of centuries before I was her age," Discord said in bored voice.
The Discord alicorn was sitting in a comfy arm chair, reading a complex book on magical theory. It seemed that Discord was getting the hang of unicorn magic as his hooves were resting by his sides and the book was held gently in a spell. After turning the last few pages Discord closed the book and tossed it over his shoulder, "Fascinating, completely wrong of course but a nice distraction."
The book never hit the floor as Twilight darted forward and caught it in her lion's paw. With a glare at Discord she was once again on the ceiling and delicately placed the book among the others, "Discord I told you not to do that!" Twilight snapped, showing a sharp set of teeth.
Spike watched the whole exchange in dumbfounded silence. He was sure he didn't see Twilight move, one moment she was on the ceiling, the next she was on the ground holding the book and finally once more on the roof. There had been a time in between these states, but Spike must have missed the gap.
"What do you mean Discord?" Spike asked slowly, not taking his slitted green eyes off Twilight's, which were watching the dragon like he was some sort of new research project to be understood.
Discord waved a hoof in a dismissive way, "Well the basic logic behind the anthro-morphing spell is sound, but once you apply it through the thirteenth dimensions you can see that the polarity of field begins to reverse, thus forcing the subject to revert back to it's original state, but that effect seems to have been overcome somewhere in our case."
Spike blinked, he understood that last contribution to the world right up to the word 'basic'. Holding his head he tried once again, "Not the book, about Twilight and your age."
"Simple observations on the nature of cross species comparative chronological development," Discord said before Spike looked up pleadingly at Twilight.
"He means, that when he was of the same comparative draconequus age, he was already completely insane," Twilight tried to explain. "I told you before; draconequus brains work far faster than a pony's, Discord is having a hard time saying what he's thinking in simple terms. It is said that the mark of true understanding and mental skill is to take the most complex idea and explain it in a way a child could understand it."
Twilight seemed to calm down as she began lecturing Spike, "With Discord only having a pony's mental makeup, he has lost some of his edge," She said in a slightly sad way. Spike wasn't sure if he should feel insulted by that last comment, he believed there was logic in there somewhere but after a few moments trying to work it out he gave up.
"So what you’re saying is you're okay Twilight," Spike more hoped than concluded.
"Just a couple of odd twitches here and there, I should be able to last three weeks at this rate give a or take a few hours," Twilight smiled down at her number one assistant.
"Um that's good, I think" Spike replied in a cautious way, "So what do we do now?"
"Oh that's simple, take two steps forward," Twilight said in a kind way, Spike had a few seconds to wonder what she meant before the door burst open and Pinkie Pie bounced in. He was knocked sprawling as the pink pony neatly leaped over the stunned reptile.
"Hi Spike, I had a feeling I was needed so I hopped right over," Pinkie gently picked up the bruised dragon and dusted him off before looking around the room, "Ooooo I see that I am just in time, Twilight will go loco in the coco if she saw all her books were missing."
Pinkie Pie then caught sight of Discord and she let out a huge gasp, in a pink blur she was next to Discord and staring intently at the grey alicorn, "Hi I'm Pinkie Pie, what's your name? you must be new!" Discord raised an eyebrow at Pinkie Pie before he answered.
"Discord, currently in Equine form due to a miss-hap with arcane polarities," Discord replied, "I was ancient when before your grandmother was a twinkle in her grandmother's eye. So no I am not new."
Pinkie's open face creased up in confusion, "Wow you knew Granny Pie, you must be old. So you’re a pony now, can you still make chocolate rain?" This kind of event was all in a day’s work for Pinkie.
"Sadly not Pinkie, he's still powerful but those kinds of tricks are for draconequus and other like creatures," Twilight called from her perch on the ceiling.
Pinkie Pie looked up and smiled, "Oh hi Twilight, I can see why you wanted the party string now, Should I leave it on the table, or do you want it up there.
"Up here is fine Pinkie and thanks for coming. I knew I could rely on you," Twilight grinned as she watched the thrown cans of party string. They left Pinkie's hoof and flew upwards, but as they reached the peak of their trajectory they accelerated away from her and landed in Twilight's lion paw with a 'Thwup'.
Spike rubbed his eyes with his palms, this was all getting very complicated. Twilight had told her assistant that he didn't need to fetch Pinkie Pie and now the dragon knew why. In so many ways Twilight's brain was speeding full steam ahead it seemed.
"Why hello spike, I see you made it back alright. Now would you mind telling me why Twilight wants one of my manikins?" Spike's heart did a flit as he heard Rarity's voice. The white unicorn was patiently waiting just outside the door to the Golden Oaks Library.
"Oh hi Rarity. I er don't know, maybe you should ask her," Spike answered, his attention still riveted on the party string cans.
Rarity was taken aback by this, "Spike, you're normally so polite and gallant, what has become of your manners?" Rarity commented as she stepped around Spike who was still watching the ceiling.
"Well I never," Rarity voiced in a peeved way before she caught sight of Discord, "Well Twilight, you never said you were having high class company with you, I would have come more prepared."
Discord arose and bowed to Rarity, "Ah my dear we meet again, may I ask how is 'Tom'?" Rarity froze and glared at Spike, "I thought you promised to 'never' speak of that again and Spike it's rude to ignore a lady. Spike? Spike! For Celestia's sake what are you staring atwoahooha!"
Rarity crumpled on the floor and looked like she was going to faint as Twilight gave her a little wave. Rarity's mouth moved up and down but no sound came out.
"Hi rarity, if you could just pass the manikin up here please that would be great," Rarity's eye twitched and without further complaint she lifted the clothes pony into the air, where it joined Twilight with the rest of her hoard.
"Spike my dear, where is Twilight?" Rarity finally managed to ask.
"You're looking at her silly," Pinkie Pie had joined the other two in looking up.
"Urer" Was all Rarity could say to that.
"Long story Rarity, just take a seat over there if you would," Twilight instructed Rarity who let herself be lead by Pinkie Pie to a waiting soft chair that Spike was sure hadn't been there moments before.
Rarity turned to look at the other stranger in the room in a glazed way, "And you are good sir?"
"Why Discord of course, I don't blame you for not recognising me, I am a little out of sorts at the moment," He replied a little moodily, Discord was used to being the centre of attention.
"Great," Twilight looked out at the sun's position before going on, "It's about time for Fluttershy to arrive," All present turned their heads at a quiet knocking on the library's door.
"Oh hello every pony, I got Twilight's letter and I came as soon as I could, I would have been here sooner, but I needed to collect 'this'," The yellow pony lifted up a small fine mesh cage, inside was a captive parasprite, "I still can't think why I would need it though."
"Why do come in Fluttershy, I am sure all will become clear," Rarity said in vague way, her eyes unfocused.
"Oh alright, um hi Spike, who's this?" Fluttershy had spotted Discord who was looking at the her with wide eyed wonder, the stallion's bored look had turned to one of confusion and his cheeks began to redden.
"Oh my fair maiden, let me take you away from here that we may fly through the sky together!" Discord declared as he sunk to one knee. This was the first time Discord had seen Fluttershy through pony eyes and he very much liked what he saw. As a draconequus he had seen Fluttershy as a good friend, but now his mind was giving him much stronger urges that he wasn't used too.
Fluttershy just stood there transfixed, she was sure she knew the voice of the pony before her, "Discord?" Was all she was able to ask before a magical aura surrounded her and lifted her from the floor. She 'mewped' as Discord floated her towards him. With his fore hooves opened wide to give her a huge hug.
Once Fluttershy was embraced he lent her over his fore leg, raised his other theatrically and opened his mouth wide taking a deep breath. Whatever he was about to say was lost as a length of party string arched right into Discord's open jaw.
"Oh I have been dying to do that," Twilight chuckled as he spluttered and dropped Fluttershy. Twilight had a can of party string in each 'hand' and a triumphant look on her face, "I would have said something earlier but it would have ruined the surprise."
Fluttershy gratefully backed away from Discord and tumbled into another comfortable seat that hadn't been there a moment before. She looked up to the ceiling with a grateful expression, "Oh Twilight there you ar..." Her eyes went wide and she began to hyperventilate.
"Spike, the cage," Twilight called out and her number one assistant hopped to work, a life time of ingrained obedience coming to the fore as he responded to Twilight's command. He lifted the cage and placed it in Fluttershy's unresistant hooves.
Twilight made a strange noise with her lips and the small insect began to 'chirrup' musically. Fluttershy's attention was instantly distracted from the draconequus above her as she focused on the sounds drifting from the cage.
"Awww it's so pretty," She 'cooed' as Fluttershy felt the tension and fear drain from her.
"Now Fluttershy, this will take a long time to explain, but it's me Twilight. You just sit tight until the others get here and then we can get started," The serpentine creature reassured her.
Spike was starting to catch the flow of things now, but there were still a lot of points he didn't understand. "Twilight, how did you know all this would happen?" Spike asked over the sounds of Discord clearing his mouth of party string.
"I didn't know these were going to happen Spike, let’s just say I worked out the chances of these events working out this way in great detail, as I said I got bored while waiting for you to come back," Twilight explained.
That sort of made sense, "So you’re understanding chaos magic too then?" Spike indicated the items stuck on the ceiling.
Twilight smiled at this, "Oh Spike of course not, by it's very nature you can't understand chaos magic, it's all far more ingrained and just kind of happens. I'm am having to work really hard not to let it run wild and distracting my brain seems to be the best way."
Spike and the others nodded, "Speaking of distractions you had best duck." Pinkie Pie said and Twilight nodded, her longer neck making it a much more expressive gesture.
Spike didn't need to be told twice and dived for the floor just as Rainbow Dash careened through the open doorway with cry of "Make way, heavy stuff coming through!"
The Pegasus flew right into another comfy arm chair that flashed out of nothingness, slowing her out of control flight and protecting the large canister she was holding. Rainbow rolled over and carefully placed the container on the ground.
"Wow sorry every pony, had to leave Cloudsdale in a bit of a hurry and couldn't slow down," The pegasus had a slightly guilty look on her face. "So spill the beans, what's going on and why did I need this can of rainbow colouring?" She looked about the room and saw Discord.
"Hey who's the unicorn......" She then saw the wings and her jaw dropped. "No-way, did Twilight find a special some pony, who's this guy?" She looked the alicorn up and down with a suspicious glance. She saw Fluttershy sitting her eyes closed as a parasprite sung to her from a cage while Rarity sat stiff as a board with only her left eye twitching.
"Oh Rainbow I am insulted, how could you even think I would be interested in Twilight, when the beautiful Fluttershy is before me," Discord said in a slightly dreamy way. He took a deep breath and raised his hoof once again, but thankfully the twin jets of party string were bang on target again. Rainbow finally looked up, seeking the source of the barrage.
For the second time that day Rainbow's mouth hung open not knowing what to say. Twilight held the cans once more and was grinning from ear to ear, showing off her impressive fangs. Rainbow had heard Discord's wheedling voice and saw a draconequus attacking a pony and jumped to the wrong conclusion from the start.
"Okay 'Discord' you're going down this time!" Rainbow launched herself upwards, well would have done if the chair hadn't become as sticky as tar at that precise moment.
"Silly Dashie, that's Twilight and he's Discord, but I can see why you could get them mixed up," Pinkie Pie pointed to the respective creatures in turn. Rainbow Dash just looked at Pinkie Pie as if she had grown an extra head.
"Thanks Pinkie but it's alright, I can take it from here," Twilight said as she deposited the can's within easy reach.
Rainbow Dash stopped straining against the sticky surface of the chair and slowly turned her rose coloured irises up to the expectant draconequus. "Twilight?" She then turned back to the retching alicorn, "Discord? Okay what's going on and it better be good?"
"Sorry rainbow, no time. I am going to let you go now and I don't want to have to stop you again okay?" Twilight snapped her fingers and the chair returned to it's former consistency. Rainbow looked like she was about to fly up again, but saw Pinkie Pie and Spike shaking their heads.
Rainbow Settled down with her fore legs crossed over her chest, "Go on I'm waiting."
Twilight lifted three claws and counted down on them one after the other, Just as the last claw lowered Applejack's voice was heard calling. "Hey, yer in there Twi? I got that plough yer wanted." The orange earth pony stepped into the room and saw the rest of them looking at her, "Okay, what in the hey is this all about? The rest of the room's occupants raised their collective hooves and claw upwards.
Applejack followed their prompting and let out a low, "Oh Nelly, I reckon I have missed an awful lot here ain't I," The rest of the ponies nodded as the door drifted shut behind Applejack and Twilight finally began to explain to them all that had happened.
"......and that's when you arrived Applejack" Twilight Finished her explanation.
The rest of the room looked back and forth from Discord to Twilight in a measure of no small amazement. Spike watched Twilight carefully, She seemed to be more in control than ever before and he wasn't sure that was a good sign or not.
"So why did you want us to bring these strange items then?" Rarity asked, she could see the reasons for the Pinkie's and Fluttershy's items but that still left the other objects. What could Twilight possibly want with a manikin, a plough and a canister of rainbow paint.
"I am glad you asked that," Twilight said in a happy way. "I don't plan to be stuck like this for the next few days, let alone the next few weeks and I think Discord agrees." Twilight indicated to the tied up Discord, After the third attempt to sing his undying love for Fluttershy had failed the others had tied him up and gagged him. That had disappointed Twilight who was eager to use the party string again, but she relented.
"Well miss clever claws, what’s the big plan then?" Rainbow Dash asked, she had been the hardest to convince that Twilight was really in there somewhere. It had taken Twilight's word for word recital of the first two chapters of 'Dearing Do and the Sapphire Stone' before Rainbow believed her.
"It's simple, I plan to work out what happened in the basement that caused the change to happen then undo it," Twilight said with a confidant voice.
"But Darling, you said there were hundreds of chemicals in there, along with a lot of powerful magic being channelled, how can you possibly piece all that information back together again?" Rarity asked, "I know you’re clever, but I don't think even you could figure that all out."
Twilight seemed to have developed the true draconequus sense of theatre as the lights all went out, "With this!" She said after a tense pause. A shaft of light illuminated the strangest contraption they had ever seen, "Isn't she beautiful?" The assembled friends looked at the collection of assembled junk that Twilight had presented.
"It's um really summit Twi, um what is it?" Applejack asked.
Twilight's left eye twitched as she looked down at her friends, they all looked so small from her vantage point. Twilight looked down at her new form and for the first time since she had formed her plan to change herself along with Discord back Twilight had a moment of doubt.
"You know what.....I have no idea." Her pupils began to drift in opposite directions and she began to giggle. It grew into a laugh that echoed around the Golden Oaks Library and the ponies all backed away from Twilight in sudden fear.
“It's fine, really I have everything under control,” Twilight's trembling voice did nothing to reassure her friends.
“I reckon we should do summit, she’s been sittin there starin at nothin fer minutes now,” Applejack’s worried voice broke the tense silence that had descended on the library.
After the unveiling of Twilight’s masterpiece and her subsequent laughing fit, the draconequus hadn’t done anything other than stare at the jumbled collection of brick-a-brack. None of her friends had dared to interrupt Twilight in case they sparked off something far worse.
“I think we should just sit and wait it out, Twilight always knows what she’s doing,” Fluttershy said in a small voice, her eyes never leaving the floor. The parasprite had ceased its soothing 'cooing' and Fluttershy was on the verge of hyperventilating once more.
“Now now, I have faith in our Twilight Sparkle, but a draconequus Twilight? That’s a totally different matter, who knows what goes on in the head of one of those creatures?” Rarity mused in a pensive way.
As one, the ponies and the dragon looked at Discord who was just sitting there 'tutting' to himself as he perused another book from the Library’s collection. The alicorn seemed to feel the gazes upon him and looked up, boredom etched deeply into his face.
“A-yesss? I assume by your vacant expressions that something is required of me?” Discord couldn’t have sounded less interested.
“You’re the expert here Discord, what’s wrong with Twi and how do we snap her out of it?” Rainbow glared at the grey pony with undisguised irritation.
Discord turned his condescending eyes to look at Twilight who was still just sitting there, the only indication she wasn’t a taxidermist's model was the rise and fall of her chest as Twilight took slow shallow breaths.
“Oh that, she’s just encountered a mental impasse from an overload of cognitive processes,” Discord commented dismissively.
“Speak plain yer stuck up feather brain,” Applejack snarled through gritted teeth.
“No need to be so rude, I was stating the facts plainly. I didn’t know I had to use filly speak for you to understand." Discord replied mockingly before returning to his book. Radiating contempt and arrogance with every syllable.
“Hey! You caused this mess, so you’re gonna help clean it up Dipcord,” Rainbow smacked the book from Discord’s grasp and glared at the seated pony.
Discord merely cocked an eyebrow at this. “Oh Rainbow, you're always thinking with your hooves, very well. “ He made a big deal of clearing his throat before going on in simpering voice, “Poor wittle Twily has a broken heady-wedy. Too many thinkies trying to be heard at once,” Rainbow felt the tight pinch on her cheek as Discord’s unicorn magic flared, making up for his own lack of fingers.
“Hey cut that out!” Rainbow shouted in embarrassment.
“Aww poor Rainy-boo boo” Discord went on before Rarity stepped in.
“That’s enough Discord; you’re saying that Twilight’s mind has, for want of a better term gotten blocked up?” Rarity looked to Twilight and nodded.
“Yesy wesy, my wittle white marshmallow, poor wittle Twi-isms is having a mental twaffic jam.” Discord continued in his patronizing way.
“Awww so how do we fix it?” Pinkie Pie chirped up, her attention being drawn away from waving her pink hoof in front of Twilight’s lopsided eyes.
Discord resumed his voice to normal before replying, “Oh it’s very simple really, but I don’t really feel like helping you see, it’s been so long since I have had my thoughts so ordered and I am in no rush to put things back the way they were.”
You could have heard a pin drop after this comment and they all looked at Discord as if he had suggested they all fly to the moon.
“You don’t want to be yourself again?” Rarity asked in a small voice, the notion taking some time to sink in.
“Why no, of course not. To have my brain full of crazy ideas all the while, not being sure what will pop in there next, it would be quite unacceptable,” Discord winked in a suggestive manner, “Plus this way I can be with my dear Fluttershy, were both ponies now you see,” Fluttershy visibly quailed at this.
“What!” Fluttershy squeaked out and did her best to hide behind the others.
“I’m a stallion now and you’re a mare. I don’t need to spell it out do I?” Discord waggled his eye brows.
Fluttershy’s pupils had shrunk to pin points, “I-I you’re a good friend and everything but....”
Discord didn’t have time to respond to this because at that moment a large bucket of water clanged onto his head, soaking him.
“That’s enough vulgarity out of you,” Rarity announced in a reproachful tone. The lingering traces of her magic faded as she released her hold on the bucket. “It seems we’re not going to get much help from him any time soon,” Rarity snorted before turning to the others as little clouds of steam curled from under Discord’s new 'hat'.
“Well he said it was summit simple, maybe we could splash some water on Twi too?” Applejack thought out loud.
“Maybe, or just a really loud noise? That always gets ponies jumping,” Rainbow added.
“Oooo oooo I know!” Pinkie Pie shouted in excitement and before any pony could stop her she produced her party cannon out of thin air.
“Worth a shot,” Rarity agreed, “Stand back Spike.”
The small dragon hadn’t left Twilight’s side since her breakdown and looked up at the others with pleading in his eyes. “You think this will work?”
“Only one way ter find out.” Applejack confirmed as Fluttershy drew Spike away from Twilight’s side.
“Just in case Spike we don’t know what may happen,” Fluttershy whispered in his ear as she gave him a comforting hug.
The collection of friends all covered their ears as Pinkie primed, lit and fired her party cannon right past Twilight’s head. Confetti and other party regalia fountained upwards, but to every pony’s disappointment Twilight didn’t react at all.
“Tarn Sarnit!” Applejack cursed.
As the streamers circled downwards they all heard a tinny chuckle from Discord. He still had the bucket stuck on his head which, despite his best efforts remained fastened around his chin. The small dent from where his horn had deformed the metal was visible, Rarity had been quite forceful.
“Oh my dears it will take far more than that I’m afraid,” Discord commented as he continued to wrestle with his new headgear. “How do you manage without claws?” He asked the world in general, as the assembled mares drew Spike into their small huddle and began whispering.
The conversation dropped to the level of hushed whispers, followed by a brief ‘mewwp’ sound from Fluttershy before the conspirators broke apart and all gazed at Discord in a predatory way. He had finally managed to remove the metal container off his head and eyed the circle of friends who surrounded him like a hunting pack.
“Oh Discord darling, you’re completely soaked. I’m so sorry but it really was for the best,” Rarity batted her eyelashes at him in her most gentle way.
Discord just snorted and did his best to wring out his mane, water still dripping off him. “Don’t try that one on 'me' Rarity, You knew perfectly well what you were doing.”
“Of course I did good sir, but you really were behaving like a brute you see and I-we couldn’t have that now could we. Not from the world’s newest alicorn,” Rarity had levitated a towel from spikes eager claws. “We see now that we’re not going to convince you to help, so we’re going to have to make the best of things.”
Discord looked over the assembled ponies with suspicious eyes, “I know you’re all planning something, don’t forget I wrote the book on underhanded tricks so don’t think you’re going to catch me out.”
“Perish the thought Discord, as if we could outwit such an intelligent stallion as you. No we’re going to have to wait for Princess Celestia and Luna to return before we can set things straight. We've talked things over and decided to make the best of it.” If Rarity looked any more innocent then a halo would have floated about her head.
“Well as long as we have got that point sorted out,” Discord mumbled as Rarity fluttered her eyelashes once again.
“Indeed Discord, but as a pony we’re going to have to show you how to behave as such,” Rarity’s smile morphed into a grin that could have sliced steel.
“What?” Discord sounded slightly panicked now.
“We simply can’t have you behaving like some sort of ruffian, especially if you want to win the favour of Fluttershy,” Rarity pressed on, as Discord’s eyes looked past her to the trembling pegasus behind.
Fluttershy looked so lost and troubled; he would do almost anything for his friend, but the white unicorn drifted into his view once again, “Now we are going to have to start with your mane.”
Discord knew this was some scheme by the ponies to make him tell them what he knew, but despite this he couldn’t help but ask defensively, “What’s wrong with my mane?”.
“Why it looks simply terrible, ponies would never dream of spending time with a stallion who didn’t take proper care of himself. Then there is your hooves, they are going to need to be sanded, buffed, polished oh and don’t make me start on your tail,” Rarity had taken out her glasses, measuring tape and worked them over Discord in a professional manner.
Discord began to have a creeping feeling of self doubt; He looked down at his bedraggled form and saw he really did look a mess. As a draconequus he had never had to take a moment to study his form, but now suddenly Discord needed to worry about his appearance it seemed.
“I don’t see what this has to do with anything; I think I look perfectly fine, just a bit well 'wet',” Discord's tone was full of confusion.
“My stars no!” Rarity almost swooned at this, “It would be totally remiss of us to let you stand another moment in that state, isn’t that right Fluttershy?” She looked over to her timid friend who wore a forced smile.
“Erm, yes that’s true. I-I think Discord would look better with a little help.” She cringed at admitting something so frankly and Discord's heart melted.
“You really think so Fluttershy?” Discord’s resolve crumbled as he looked into those blue eyes that couldn’t hold his gaze. “Very well anything for you my dear!” He stood up straight and stuck out his muzzle in a dramatic pose. “Rarity lead on, I am in your capable hooves,” All the while a little voice in his head told him he was being tricked, but Discord had listened to hundreds of voices in his own head over the years, as a pony and he was going to make his own choices from now on.
Applejack opened the door so Rarity could lead Discord out into bright Ponyville sunshine. She quickly turned, flashed a little grin and winked to the rest as the door closed behind her.
“Are you quite sure this is totally necessary?” Discord asked in an almost pleading way.
“You want to look your best don’t you? You don’t want to let Fluttershy down do you?” Rarity had been giving ‘encouragement’ along with ‘advice’ for over an hour now and Discord’s head was spinning. He dared not move an inch in case Rarity ‘corrected’ him once again.
Discord sighed in defeat as Rarity ran his mane through yet ‘another’ washing and styling. His thoughts were moving so slowly and he could feel that dreaded Boredom creeping back upon him. The other thing that troubled him was that he needed to walk to Rarity’s Boutique actually walk along the ground! Discord had never walked more than few meters in his life. Normally he just imagined where he wanted to be and he was there.
He had briefly considered teleporting, but Rarity insisted that it was “Not the done thing,” and after his last few accidents he wasn’t willing to put himself in more danger. Flying, that was another thing that irked Discord, he was sure he could have flown. Having wings just like before the accident, but now he had to obey all the boring laws of lift and air resistance.
Discord’s first few attempts at flight had seen him colliding with trees on a regular basis and after the fourth crash he had limited himself to his hooves. Now it seemed to take forever to get anywhere, how did ponies cope with life moving so slowly? Discord pushed these thoughts from his mind, he was doing this to impress Fluttershy and the mere thought of her made him break out in a sweat.
Rarity levitated a mirror up to Discord who regarded his much changed appearance. He now wore a full suit, with massive ruffs and some sort of strange neck brace that looked very old fashioned to Discord’s mind, but Rarity assured him that it looked great.
“Are you quite sure she will like it?” Discord asked in the most sincere tone that Rarity had ever heard and her heart crumpled a little. The plan had been...well the plan was to make Discord’s life as a pony a right nuisance, but now it came to it Rarity was having second thoughts.
She had swallowed her pride to make Discord look as stuffy and old fashioned as ever. Pulling out every clashing colour and out dated style she could find. Her eyes ached when she looked at the alicorn before her, but Rarity saw the longing in his eyes and she realised she just couldn’t do that even to him. He was a victim here, just as much as Twilight.
After taking a deep breath the fashion conscious pony made up her mind. Rarity looked into Discord’s earnest eyes and knew what she had to do, “You know what, this outfit may have been all the rage last season, but I think you would do much better with something a little more modern.”
Discord’s face fell and he looked at the floor with a dejected expression and mumbled; “great, more waiting”, but to his amazement Rarity took far less time and the stallion watched as she levitated cloth, scissors and thread which enveloped him in a whirlwind.
It took less than half the time of the first outfit to create and soon Rarity was finishing off the last stitch and fastening the final button. She took a few steps back and gave her work a final critical eye.
Discord just stood there trembling and awaiting the shake of Rarity’s head to announce some other small detail was wrong, but to his immense relief she nodded to herself.
“Now you look smashing my dear, I do believe you will turn some heads with this outfit Discord,” She levitated a mirror up to him once again and showed him her work.
The ‘uniform’ looked very smart, it’s dark green shade with warm yellow thread around the buttons gave Discord a slightly roguish charm, there was even a small scabbard at his side held on by a simple black belt and though it lacked a real blade, the flourish looked perfect for the get up. Discord could have passed for an air ship’s captain and it certainly looked far better than the previous outfit.
Discord smiled and bowed, causing Rarity to smile in a supportive way. He really did look fetching Rarity told herself. Now very proud of her work and far happier with this than the previous plan Rarity hustled Discord out of the shop and headed back to the Golden Oaks library.
As they trotted along Rarity kept biting her lip, worry and unease on her face. Discord saw the worried look in her blue eyes. “Oh please tell me there is nothing else to do!” He cried out in frustration.
“Hmm? Oh no Discord, you're looking absolutely perfect,” Rarity sounded distracted and her eyes drifted to the distant outline of Twilight’s library. What ‘was’ she going to tell the others?
Discord nodded and visibly relaxed as Rarity despite herself couldn’t help but notice he really did cut a dashing figure. Twilight was depending on them to make her an alicorn again, but Rarity saw the loneliness in Discord’s eyes and the pleading way he spoke and she knew that she just couldn’t make things worse for him.
It was only for a few weeks at most right? Surely it wouldn’t do any harm to let Discord have a small taste of being a normal pony for a while? Rarity was at war with herself and didn’t know what the right answer was here. As they came to the door of Twilight’s home she still didn’t have the answer.
“Shhhh, they’re coming.” Rainbow had been watching at the windows for Discord and Rarity for the last ten minutes. The pair was running late and the conspirators were beginning to think something awful had happened. Looking back inside Rainbow saw the others were all taking their positions.
The ponies had shifted Twilight into a corner and left her facing the wall, her vacant stare had begun to unnerve them and she didn’t seem to mind. It had taken them some time to convince Fluttershy to play her part in this little scheme but now the pegasus stood trembling awaiting the return. They would make it clear that Discord’s life as pony was far worse than as a draconequus and then he would tell them how to fix Twilight.
They held their breath as the sound of approaching hoof falls came closer, then after a short pause the door opened and Rarity called out, “We’re here and I must say I think this is my best work ever!” The collective gasps of her friends would haunt Rarity to her dying day she was sure. They all stared at the pristine Discord standing in the doorway, looking like a brave sailor coming back from a long voyage. The four ponies and one dragon stood there opened mouthed and Discord felt a blush forming on his muzzle.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to cause a scene, maybe I should go...." Discord began before Fluttershy shuffled forward and made a feeble attempt to slap him in the face which translated into a tiny tap on the cheek.
“Um er....well I think you look dreadful Discord, how dare you show up looking like that....” Fluttershy’s poorly acted reprimand caused Rainbow and Applejack to face hoof. Fluttershy looked up into Discord’s handsome face. “Sorry I er.....” Her words trailed off and without completely knowing why she leaned forward and kissed Discord on the cheek.
Discord’s eyes lost their focus, his horn gave off little sparks and for once in his life the creature’s mind was totally still. When he was aware of the world around him once again he found himself on the floor with a ring of concerned pony faces and one little dragon looking down on him.
“What did you do that for Fluttershy, are you crazy he’s Dipcord?” Rainbow’s voice could be head berating.
“Sorry girls, he just looked so scared and confused; I didn’t know what else to do. He had made such an effort to get all dressed up I didn’t want to disappoint him,” Discord recognised Fluttershy’s worried tones replying.
“Why didn’t ya stick to the plan Rarity? Yer were meant ter make him look a ‘buffoon’ n then we could get him to tell us how to fix Twi when he didn’t wanna be a pony no more!” Applejack’s angry voice called out over Discord’s head.
“Oh I’m sorry, I just couldn’t do it. Look at what this brute has nearly turned us into, it just wasn’t us,” Rarity scolded back. “Plus he does have such a fine coat I just had to make it work,” She added as an afterthought.
“I still say we should have just thrown him a “Please turn Twilight back party.” Pinkie Pie added her two bits into the mix and Discord felt he had heard enough.
“Ladies please, enough of this, Spike be so good as to help me up will you?” Discord asked in such a polite way that Spike found himself moving to obey without thought.
The mares all took a step back as Spike helped Discord to his hooves, “Now ladies, I understand there was an attempt to deceive me just now, but that’s alright. You were just worried about our friend Twilight."
They all looked at Discord as if he had suggested Nightmare Moon was a kind and loving pony. The voice was the same but the tone and feelings behind it didn’t sound like Discord at all.
“Pardon Discord? It almost sounded like yer were bein all polite there for a moment,” Applejack said in a suspicious way.
Discord nodded at this and did a quick mental survey of his head. His thoughts were organised and fine, he felt ‘ordered’. The pony rubbed his chin with his hoof and thought deeply about things.
“If I were a betting pony, then I would say that it was a little more than just our species that swapped in our little ‘accident’, maybe a bit of personality came across too? I did wonder why I had such a craving to read books,” That seemed to be a logical train of thought and it caused Discord to shudder.
The others looked really worried at this idea. “You mean Twilight will be just as loco as you before long?” Pinkie asked as she held her fore hooves to her head and rolled her eyes to emphasise the point.
Discord shook his head, nodded and then shook it again. “Sort of, by default a draconequus literally drive themselves mad and seek to cause chaos, whereas a standard pony is a calming and ordered creature seeking out harmony and peace,“ Discord had taken on a lecturer’s tone now, that all those present felt uncomfortably familiar with.
“I would guess that at points of high stress or emotion, the basic underlying tendency or instinct will become more pronounced as the body falls back on it’s natural state. Therefore it would be simple to assume that the longer we are both stuck like this the more prone to order or chaos we will respectively become.”
The other ponies in the room had taken on a glassy eyed expression as Discord droned on and Spike was visibly swaying as he fought to stay awake, but Discord showed no sign of stopping.
“So it would be more accurate to state that Twilight will become more erratic as I ‘was’ Miss Pinkie. Whereas I will become more dull and ordered,” Discord’s face fell as he reached a conclusion he didn’t like. “However our basic personalities are very much incompatible with the base line of our forms.”
Only Rarity was awake now and she gently nodded as her eye lids drooped heavily. The rest of the group had sunk to the floor and were snoozing quietly as Discord continued to work his train of thought to it’s conclusion.
“Therefore we will not find happiness in the way we are and will slowly lose the beings we used to be. Not only that, we will both be in a far worse state than either of us would have been before hoof. I will be the dullest pony there has ever been, and Twilight the maddest draconequus the world has ever known!” Discord looked down at his cutie mark which had first been a chunk of burning ice, but was now fading to be replaced with what looked like the digit ‘zero’, “This will not do.”
As Rarity also slipped into unconsciousness Discord resolved to do what must be done, for himself, for his friends and for Equestria as a whole, he needed his madness back! Discord shuddered: That was the longest line of reasoning he had ever experienced and never wanted to go through that again.
Shaking himself down Discord put on his most winning smile and stooped to lift the slumbering Fluttershy to her hooves. She blinked drowsily before slipping into sleep once again, nevertheless Discord pressed on, “I am sorry my dear, but for the sake of us all I am going to have to do something you will not like.”
Fluttershy’s droopy eyes tried to focus on him, but her eyelids were so heavy. Discord raised his free hoof into the air with a theatrical flourish, planted his back legs to put himself on firmer ground before taking a deep breath.
It felt like the whole of creation held it’s breath with him and to the horror of all present, Discord the alicorn began to sing a love song for Fluttershy.....
It began as a nagging twitch, a feeling which slowly moved it’s way up the tail and spread into the lower legs and set off a full tremble. The tremble travelled up the spine and set the shoulders into a full shiver. As that shiver reached the neck it evolved into a full blown shudder that's when it met Twilight’s eyes causing to them spasm.
As Twilight became aware of her surroundings once more, she narrowed her eyes and focused on the wall before her. The last thing she remembered was looking at her creation and forgetting what it was for, then her long ears flicked up as she heard a dull droning monotone sound which seemed to be singing.
It must have been this terrible sound that had broken her out of her mental impasse, it was just so..... Twilight didn’t have words to describe it, but the sound grated on every nerve of her body.
Twilight’s uneven eyes widened in shock as she saw her friends all in a stupor and Fluttershy’s limp form being held in Discord’s fore hooves. It seemed he was the source of the dreadful dirge, which had less life in it than a text book on napkin protocols.
Twilight shook her head, that sort of book had always fascinated her, why ponies would have so many ways of folding the little paper tools, but now it seemed so...dull. She leant back on her haunches and rubbed her chin in deep thought while Her tail waved back and forth. Then with an unconscious command the fury tip of her tail snapped it’s ‘fingers’ and produced a pair of red and white coloured ear muffs covering Twilight’s tormented ears.
With the horrid noise blocked Twilight snapped her fingers once again and a small mug of hot chocolate appeared, “Now what was I doing?” She lifted the drink up and savoured the flavour, "fascinating". She downed the mug before tossing the liquid away which transformed mid flight into a small legged turnip which scuttled off into the recesses of the library.
“Ah yes that was it,” Twilight snapped her fingers yet again and the collection of clutter her friends had gathered appeared before her. Her lopsided and mismatched pupils focused on the contraption, scrutinising with a critical gaze.
“Oh, no, no, no, this will never do, it needs more colour.” With a vague wave of her mottled paw and with a bright flash the assembly formed into what looked like a giant candy cane. Twi shook her head, “hmmm no, just not quite right,” With another snap of her claw the confection vanished to be replaced with a yellow spotted elephant which ‘blarbed’ loudly, causing Spike to stir.
As Twilight continued her efforts to gain satisfaction, Spike blinked the sleep out of his eyes and wished he hadn’t. The room was filled with the sounds of hoots and honks all mixed in with an background drone of some terrible creature in full song.
Spike looked about in worry and saw the total chaos all around; books were flying off the shelves, flapping their pages gently in an unseen breeze, “Twilight you’re awake...um Twilight? Spike’s voice became concerned. She had all her attention focused on the changing forms before her. Spike drew himself up to his full height and bellowed at the top of his lungs “Twilight!”
Twilight vanished and reappeared floating upside down in front of the bemused little dragon. “Oh hi Spike you’re awake, that’s good I could use your advice,” Spike watched as his sister’s eyes spun in their sockets. “I need your opinion; I can’t seem to get this right,” She waved at the still changing form in the middle of the room.
“Um Twi, are you sure you should be playing with that magic. It’s having some other effects too,” Spike waved his claw to show the general pandemonium that the library had become. “Your books, they’re.....” Spike trailed off as Twilight vanished again and the dragon heard her reply from above.
“You’re right spike, it seems the more I try to control this draconequus magic the less tamed it becomes,” Twilight was pacing back and forth along the ceiling on her hind legs. Small flowers sprouted after she passed. “By it’s very nature chaos magic doesn’t ‘want' to make sense.”
Discord finally finished his singing and looked to Fluttershy with an enamored expression, “So very sorry my dear, I had no other way of snapping you out of it,” Discord with great care placed Fluttershy on the floor and looked up at Twilight above him.
“Twilight we have to fix this, we won’t last three days let alone three weeks in our present forms,” He replied in a level way, his voice still dull monotone that caused Spike’s eye lids to feel heavy once more.
Twilight vanished and appeared coiled about Discord with a grin on her face, “Very true, that’s why I have been working on that,” She pointed a paw in the direction of the blur in the centre of the room. The object of her attention didn’t stay the same from one moment to the next.
“It won’t do what I tell it too!” Twilight snapped angrily as she glared at the offending claw, “How-did-you-manage-to-get your magic to obey?” Twilight was gently knocking on Discord’s horn with the back of her knuckle in time with her words.
Discord shook his head, and a little of the wild glint returned to his vacant eyes. “Miss Twilight, our magic is not like your simple unicorn spells. It doesn’t come from study and learning, but comes from the way we ‘feel’. Until you understand that it will never behave, you have to ‘encourage’ it to do something ‘fun’, something which that happens to 'work' for you.”
The pony indicated the pair of mufflers on Twilight’s ears, “Mutually beneficial you see, I doubt your body wanted to hear that ghastly noise I made, any more than your mind did.”
Twilight’s eyes crossed to stare at the ear protectors on her head and nodded in a vague way, “Okay, so I need to find ‘fun’ ways to make it do what I want?” She smiled as relief washed over her face, “I know lots of fun things to do, this will be simple.” Twilight limbered up only to have Discord cut her off.
“Um no Twilight, I think I should handle this one if you don’t mind,” Discord took a couple of steps forward and his horn glowed: A grey glow surrounded the changing mass in the centre of the room and it visibly slowed. After a few seconds the creation stabilised once again as the original contraption that Twilight had assembled.
Twilight looked put out, vanishing again, only to reappear on the ceiling among her beleaguered books, “Well if that's how you feel about things I'm just going to stay up here, as you ‘obviously’ don’t need me,” Discord shook his head and continued with his magic.
“Yer mean yer know what this doo-hiki of Twi’s is Discord?” Applejack watched him with a suspicious gaze.
“Why of course Miss Applejack, I do believe it is a hypnotic device built to aid in ones recalling of memory,” Discord cleared his throat. “I mean it will help Twilight remember what was happening when the accident occurred.”
This simply earned another growl from above as Twilight made sure the ponies below knew of her continued displeasure. The temperature dropped and snow began drift down, “Now now Miss Twilight don’t be like that, your machine is very good, considering what you had to work with,” Discord reassured in a soothing tone.
“Well it ought to be, I designed it.” Twilight announced with a touch of pride.
“Another drawback, we do tend to get a little big headed too,” Discord whispered to Rarity, motioning upwards with his eyes.
“I heard that,” Twilight growled.
“Now my dear, if you would be so good as to come down, we can begin,” Discord had arranged the 'clutter' to look like some sort of chair. The manikin rarity had brought forming the seat, the wood from the plough made up the framework and the blade had been painted in multi-colours hues.
That wasn't all, there was now far more to it than just what other ponies had donated for it’s construction. Discord had added cogs, pulleys and a variety of mechanical components which all lead to a large crank set behind the manikin. With a final flourish of magical power Discord connected these altogether and waved a hoof for Twilight to sit down.
“I am 'not' getting in that thing,” Twilight's petulant voice informed them all.
“Awww come on Twilight, it'll be funa fun fun,” Pinkie Pie had produced a long length of yarn from nowhere.
“Pinkie Pie, what in the name of Celestia is that for?” Rainbow Dash asked in confusion before Rarity pointed up at Twilight.
The draconequus stared hungrily at the simple length of string as Pinkie Pie slowly waved it back and forth. In the end Twilight could hold herself no longer and vanished. Pinkie gently placed the cord on the chair just in time for Twilight to materialise. Collectively the friends watched as Twilight’s eagle claw and lion’s paw began working the string into ever more complex patterns.
“Very clever Miss Pie,” Discord commented with approval. He stepped around the large form of Twilight and used his magic to begin turning the crank. The cogs and drives began to move and in turn spun the brightly coloured plough blade. Twilight’s attention was drawn from the now very tangled cord and her eyes began to spin in time with the rotating metal. The fore legs of the manikin closed in, holding Twilight in it's comfortable embrace.
“Now Miss Twilight, I want you to think back to when I first came into the library. Think back to what you were doing,” Discord’s voice had taken on a teacher’s tone.
Twilight nodded slowly, her eyes never leaving the flashing colours before her face, as Discord pressed on, “Very good, now when you reach the moment just before you dropped everything I want you to freeze the image in your mind.”
After a short time Twilight nodded slowly and Discord smiled, “Wonderful, now I want you to point out to us all the vials and then tell us what spells you were channelling.....
Spike chewed his claws in worry as Discord directed the assembled ponies in the room to gather what was needed. Twilight had remained in her trance-like state as Discord continued to crank the handle of the machine, she had pointed out the various potions and magical items for her friends to amass.
It took a long time, but thankfully there were enough chemicals remaining in the Golden Oaks library to recreate everything that was needed to repeat the event. Finally Discord ushered the five other equines out before turning to Spike, "Come now Spike," the little dragon held Twilight's claw in his own and sniffled.
"She will be okay right?" Spike's pleading eyes looked into Discord's confident ones with undisguised worry.
"Well this is our best chance, failing that we will just have to wait for Luna and Celestia's return," Discord gently nudged Spike with his muzzle and gave him a little wink, "She will be fine Spike."
With an effort Spike released his hold on Twilight's claw and shuffled out of the room. With a final wave Discord reattached the door before turning his attention to the problem at hoof. The others therefore didn't see his face move from one of confidence to one of concern.
"Well my dear let's see if this works..."
The six friends all waiting in varying states of anxiety, the basement laboratory had been very quiet for the past few minutes and all feared something else may have gone wrong. Spike’s resolve was crumbling, just as he was about to rush forward and fling the door open there was a muffled ‘Boomph’.
Multi-coloured smoke began to seep around the edges of the wooden door, just as before and the collected friends all looked at each other with a mixture of hope and fear. Finally Spike leaped forward, yanked open the door and dived into the smoky haze calling Twilight’s name the whole while. He was soon lost from view and closely followed by the others.
“Twilight! Twilight! Did it work?” Spike shouted out in between coughs.
“Spike!” Came the answering call from somewhere in the murk and his heart leaped: That sounded like the Twilight he knew and loved.
Spike spotted the vague outline in the smoke and rushed forward to embrace it, “Oh Twilight I was so worried, I’m so glad you’re okay!” Spike buried his head in the furry chest of his big sister.
“As touching as this all is, I think your aim is a little off Spike,” Discord gently patted the dragon on the head with a paw. With a snap of his fingers Discord caused the smoke to transform into custard which fell to the ground with a ‘splop’.
Spike pushed himself away as the looming form of Discord who grinned in a happy way, “Ah back to my manic self once again, I can’t say I missed all the voices in my head, but they sure missed me.”
Spike looked about the messy space and saw one of Twilight’s wings poking out from a mound of yellow goo. He ran forward splashing the confection everywhere. Before he could stop himself, slipped and travelled the last few meters on his belly before finally colliding with the stirring form of Twilight.
Twilight’s bemused eyes filled with happiness as she saw the prone form of Spike lying before her, his purple and green scales almost completely hidden under a mask of custard. The restored alicorn lent down and hugged her adopted baby brother in with joy in her heart.
Very soon Twilight and spike found themselves under a pony pile as the other five fillies joined in the celebration. Even Rarity didn’t seem to care that she was waist deep in custard as she plunged in. The laboratory was in utter chaos, smashed vials and broken beakers everywhere.
Discord stood a little way apart from the rest and looked about the room with a contented sigh, Such disorder made his draconequus' heart bounce with glee, but his mismatched eyes had a slight melancholy.
“Oh Discord, come here. We couldn’t of fixed this without you,” Fluttershy’s gentle voice drew Discord’s attention back to the huddle and he saw his friend’s yellow hoof beckoning him over.
With a sheepish grin Discord vanished and reappeared coiled around the ponies with his head just close enough to hear Twilight whisper something about them, 'Not being in this mess in the first place if he hadn't bothered her to start with'. Discord winked at Fluttershy who gave him a reprimanding look.
Discord uncoiled himself and sighed again before snapping his fingers once more: In a bright flash the room was restored as it should be and he looked to Fluttershy who gave a big nod of encouragement.
Twilight began to lead the other ponies and Spike out of the room, having had enough of 'science' for one day. This would have left Discord standing alone in the now gleaming room, if Rarity hadn’t stopped to look back.
“You know my dear, you can be really charming when you make the effort. I recognise what Fluttershy sees in you now,” She gave a big sigh, “Such a shame you really did look good in that outfit.”
Discord gave an embarrassed smile, “Thank you Rarity, by changing that marvelous plan you really gave me a chance at being a good pony,” Tears forming in his eyes as he moved slowly over to Rarity. “Sorry about the 'marshmallow' comment, you really do look fabulous and not like a confectionery at all.”
Rarity blushed, “Why Discord I do believe a little bit of your charming pony self is coming through.”
Discord bowed before the unicorn. “If you tell any of the others I will of course deny it.”
Rarity smiled and held out a hoof to the creature of chaos, “Let’s make this the start of a new friendship huh?”
Discord looked down at Rarity’s offered hoof and very timidly reached out with his lions paw. After a hesitant pause his fingers closed about the unicorn’s hoof and he looked hopefully into those sparkling blue eyes before simply saying, “Ooopsie?”
There was a another puff of smoke as all the restored items about the laboratory ‘accidentally’ toppled over before crashing down.....
Twilight’s ears pricked up and her head followed suit as she heard the sounds of utter destruction coming from downstairs. She hadn’t noticed the door closing again and as Twilight pushed on she discovered it to be firmly locked shut. The five ponies and Spike rushed up to the portal as the sounds of shouting, roaring and the occasional ‘squeak’ of a rubber duck resounded from within.
“Twi, what’s going on?” Spike shouted in a nervous voice just as panicked hoof falls approached the laboratory door which was suddenly enveloped in a pale blue glow.
The ponies only had a moment to jump back before the much abused door was wrenched open again and a grey unicorn staggered out and slammed it shut behind them. The ponies went to ask Rarity what had happened before he noticed that her cutie mark looked wrong: To Spike’s dismay he saw it was a cube of burning ice.
The now 'unicorn' Discord flashed the watching equines and dragon another roguish smile, “Sorry ladies can’t stop I have an appointment with Miss Fluttershy,” With that Discord grabbed the pony in question and dragged the pegasus out the front door, just as the laboratory door behind him disintegrated into a cloud of candy floss.
“Discord!” A furious roar came from down the stairwell as Twilight, Spike and the others all turned back to see the enraged form of a blue and white draconequus snaking up the steps. They got the brief impression of two sapphire blue eyes burning with rage and a strange pink furry pamphlet hanging on for dear life, before the much larger Rarity barged past. Not stopping, she tore after the fleeing pair like an avenging angle leaving small piles of mushrooms in her wake.
“Discord, When I get my claws on you being dressed up in a foppish, out of date travesty of an outfit will be the least of your worries!” The Rarity draconequus snarled with words that took physical form and bounced onto the ground as small balls of yarn.
There was a stunned moment as every pony took in what they had just witnessed before Twilight shook her head with a weary smile, “Come on girls, looks like this day isn’t over yet.....”
"Discord Stop!" Fluttershy squeaked as the now unicorn Discord pulled her along by a trembling hoof.
"Not now my dear, busy running for our lives. I will explain every thing once we have some distance from Miss Rarity," As if to reinforce the point there was a distant rumble and a light sprinkling of candyfloss began to drizzle from the sky.
"But..." Fluttershy tried once again as she was dragged around another corner. Discord was making steady progress away from Twilight's library and showed no intention of stopping now. Behind them the sounds of a very irate draconequus resounded around Ponyville. Rarity was quickly discovering just how much magical power a creature of chaos could bring to bear and how much said powers were linked to the mood of a draconequus.
Rarity's fury at being tricked into swapping species with Discord was evident as the sky filled with swirling clouds of confetti, cheese cake and one very startled flamingo, "It's just high spirits, she will calm down in no time" Discord assured his fellow pony as they once again had to duck a low flying hamster.
The general cries of alarm and panic added to the mayhem as ponies galloped about frantically. They fled the epicenter of the chaos storm as it worked it's bizarre effects further and further a field. Discord turned his attention from his mad dash to Fluttershy, "Now my dear I'll explain everything, well almost everything, actually just what you need to know, infact......"
Unfortunately with his focus on the yellow pegasus, Discord failed to see the impending obstacle and was cut off mid ramble as he ran head first into a red wall. Discord blinked up as the large form of Bigmac stared down at the small grey unicorn in surprise. Bigmac's green eyes went wide as saucers as he recognised who it was with the distracted unicorn.
"Fluttershy?" Was all the stallion was able to ask before Discord cannoned off in another direction, dragging the reluctant filly behind him. Fluttershy was able to give Bigmac a little wave before she and Discord disappeared around the corner. Bigmac's gentle face was full of confusion as he watched the pair flee and the building they had galloped past begin to dribble tomato source from it's windows.
The hefty stallion was about to call out when something else careened into his flank with a cry of "Tarn sarnet!" Bigmac easily recognised his younger sister's curse and turned to see Applejack now lying on the floor with a large marshmallow in place of her normal hat. Evedently running into her older brother had forced the confection over her eyes and despite himself Bigmac couldn't help but grin at the sight. He reached forward and began to pull off parts of the sugary 'hat' with his teeth.
"Ur A.J what's goin on?" Bigmac asked in a lost voice once he had freed Applejack from her white face mask. As soon as she could see again Applejack glared at the world in general. Her normally neat mane was now thoroughly gummed up with fluffy sweet which to Bigmac surprise didn't catch fire, I had been along time since Bigmac had seen Applejack this furious.
"Discord pony-napped Fluttershy n turned Rarity inter a draconcuss thingy!" Applejack yelled before resuming her pursuit of the fleeing pair, "More than that he owes me a new hat!" Applejack called as she too rounded the corner. It took only moments for Bigmac to follow his sister's example and quickly galloped after the others as the rain turned 'chocolate moose' flavoured. Bigmac had to duck and weave as life size replicas of the animal began to shatter all around him. Very soon the ground was ankle deep brown tasty fragments and showed no sign of stopping.
About seven minutes and an ecstatic Pinkie later, Discord peeked out from under the awning from sugar cube corner he had 'aquired' during their mad flight. Discord had led Fluttershy on a merry dance through the streets whilst doing his best to avoid the raging Rarity along the growing number of ponies hunting Discord, no doubt to bring him to account for the rampaging white and blue draconequus now terrorising Ponyville..
After hiding from a number of herds, things finally seemed to be quieting down. The 'moose' rain abated and was quickly replaced by the bright sunshine of a normal Ponyville day. Satisfied that they were in no immediate danger of discovery Discord tucked his head back under the awning and grinned at Fluttershy. She just watched the unicorn with a disbelieving look in her gentle eyes.
"Now we have a moment my dear I...." Discord trailed off as Fluttershy's face morphed to an angry scowl and the unicorn felt his resolve melting in the face of that stare.
"Discord, what have you done now?" Fluttershy asked in a cold voice.
"well I er...I" Discord tried to wring his hands in embarrassment only to remember too late that he was hooved once again.
"Well?" Fluttershy repeated in a far more forceful tone and Discord felt his ears press down against his head.
"I may have accidentally used the potions in Twilight's laboratory to swap places with Rarity," Discord tried to make the 'inverted-comma' signal with his fingers but just ended up waving his hooves up and down in a silly way.
The power of the stare increased and Discord shrunk back from Fluttershy, "But it's only for one day I assure you!" Discord cried out all the while shielding his face from those 'disapproving eyeballs'. Weather Fluttershy had improved her art, or because he was now a pony the effect was the same and Discord found he couldn't meet the angered glare of the timid pegasus.
"Turn-her-back-now" Fluttershy spoke in a definite tone, her eyes never leaving Discord.
"Well I, as much as I would like too...." Discord mumbled in response.
"Now Discord!" Fluttershy's eyes had grown to fill Discord's whole world and he practically cowered in the corner of their small hiding place.
"I can't!" The unicorn pleaded, "As I told you it's only for one afternoon, Rarity wasn't an alicorn so there wasn't enough magic to make it permanent! We'll revert back at sundown, honest!"
Fluttershy lent back and closed her eyes much to Discord's relief, "So you did know what you were doing with this whole mess then? You were just pulling our legs?" As she opened her eyes once more Fluttershy saw the look of injured pride on Discord's pony face.
"Why of course not! That really was an accident, but it seemed such a shame to let such knowledge go to waste and so I took the chance for a little 'holiday'" Discord continued to fiddle with his hooves in an anxious way, his eyes never leaving the floor.
Fluttershy wasn't sure if she believed him or not. Discord was practically a compulsive liar, but she decided to give him the benefit of the doubt, again. "Okay, but did you think what Rarity would think of your 'little holiday'?" Fluttershy didn't use the 'stare' this time, but the note of disapproval was clear.
"Well I did actually," Discord retorted in a defensive tone as he sat up to be eye level with Fluttershy, "She was so highly strung and obsessed with every thing being 'so-so'. I thought it best to give her a break from that and now she can let her mane down for the rest of the day."
Discord looked up to the sky noting the return of normality. "See all better" He smiled his mischievous smile once more and Fluttershy raised an eyebrow again.
Discord coughed, "Alright fine I didn't think that far ahead, but I still think it turned out pretty well nevertheless. She really is quite inventive as a draconequus. I Believe I could learn a thing or two from her," Fluttershy gave Discord another 'look' and the pony bowed his head in submission.
"Well then, now you need to promise not to do anything like this again before I take you up on your offer of a fun afternoon," Fluttershy had taken on a reprimanding voice that Discord was growing to fear, but then his head registered what she had said and his ears pricked up in excitement.
"Really? You would have a fun afternoon with me?" The unicorn's voice full of hope.
Fluttershy nodded but held up a hoof, "Yes, but first the promise."
Discord knew what was expected of him, "Cross my heart and hop....." Discord began before suddenly the awing was torn off their hiding place to reveal a triumphant Applejack backed up by Bigmac who loomed over the pair.
"I'll save you Miss Fluttershy!" Bigmac roared as he brought the flat of a garden spade clanging down on Discord's head. The unicorn went corss-eyed as little apples circled about his head. The unconscious pony toppled sideways, leaving a shocked Fluttershy who stared up at a beaming Bigmac taking pride at a job well done.
"Yer didn't have to hit him that hard, he aint a dracona thingy no more," Applejack scolded her big brother as the sheepish stallion helped Discord out of the door of Ponyville Hospital.
"Sorry A.J, but yer did say he had pony-napped Miss Fluttershy," Bigmac apologised for the third time.
"Your concern for me is very touching Applejack, thank you," Discord nursed his bandaged head as he weaved his unsteady way along the path leading back to town.
"Think nothin of it yer varmint, if Bigmac goes and finishes yer off before I get a whack at yer I would never fergive him," Discord glanced in fear at Applejack, the grin on her face didn't bode well for him.
"Ladies first Applejack, my revenge takes precedence," Discord's eyes went wide with fear as he turned to look at the coiled form of Rarity who was watching the four ponies from a nearby tree.
"Ah Miss Rarity, I er...I" Discord stammered before the white beast vanished and reappeared floating in the air before him, her blue eyes full of mischief. Discord trembled as he did his best to produce another of his winning smiles, "I see you have gotten the hang of chaos magic then, good for you."
Rarity casually studied her eagle's claw (which Discord noted was immaculate and had 'talon polish' on it) while keeping literally one eye focused on the unicorn. Rarity's grin only widened as she pretended to buff her lion's claw against her chest before turning her full and imposing attention on Discord.
"Well it was a shock I must say, but after the initial upset 'chaos' and I have come to an understanding, I can be very persuasive when I choose to be," If Discord's ears weren't already covered in bandages they would have pressed tightly against his aching skull.
Rarity gave a little sigh before continuing on, "And while I would have loved to try out some of my fabulous ideas on you dear Discord, Fluttershy informs me that she has an agreement with you for a fun day out?"
Discord grasped this life line whole hardheartedly and nodded his head vigorously, remembering too late his current injuries. He swayed and clutched his sore head as as Rarity continued, "Very well then, I shall have to find other ways to entertain myself," with that Rarity snapped her lion's paw and vanished with a distant echo of disturbing laughter.
"Oh what have I unleashed upon the world?" Discord moaned while holding his head in his hooves.
"With Rarity it'll be summit fabulously 'Froo-Froo' yer can count on that," Applejack said with a slight shudder, "But at least it'll only be fer one afternoon, I doubt even she can cause that much trouble in such a short time.
"Don't count on it," Discord warned as Fluttershy looked expectantly at him.
"So?" Fluttershy asked as Discord stared incomprehensibly at her, his head still spinning.
"So what?" The dazed stallion asked back.
Fluttershy continued to stare at Discord, "So what's the plan for the next few hours? You promised me a fun day and so far all you've done is taken me to Ponyville hospital," Discord blinked a few times as he tried to recall the fuzzy events leading up to his encounter with a spade.
Fortunately Applejack came to the rescue, "All sorted Fluttershy, were gonna have yer both over ter Sweet Apples fer a dinner date. Bigmac want's ter make up fer conckin 'D' on the noggin." Applejack lowered her voice, "Even if I reckon he deserved it." Discord failing to notice beamed happily at this idea, while secretly noting to take more care before enacting a plan in the future. Being a unicorn for just one afternoon was proving far from the relaxing experience he had hoped for.
The sun was well past it's zenith before Discord and Fluttershy found themselves seated at a wooden table just off the edge of the main apple orchard at Sweet Apple Acres. After the hectic events of the morning Discord was looking forward to some peace and alone time with his pegasus friend.
He stared with a slightly glazed expression as the pony sat across the red and white checked table cloth and smiled contentedly. This wasn't to last, as Discord soon discovered his dear friend looked everywhere but directly at him and didn't utter one word.
"So um how's Angel doing? I haven't seen him since yesterday," Discord spoke, desperately attempting to break the awkward silence that had settled on the pair. He didn't want it this peaceful.
"He's fine," Fluttershy responded with a small voice as she looked off towards the house.
"That's um good?" Discord had not pictured this meeting going like this. How did one talk to a pony mare during dinner? A draconequus just threw the most interesting thing they could create at the other sex and if the girl didn't throw it back right away you were off to a good start, but here with Fluttershy it meant talking to her.
"Your mane is very pretty this evening," Discord tried again, Compliment's normally work alright he told himself.
"Thank you," Fluttershy stated while looking to Bigmac who shifted uncomfortably. Once again it seemed she wouldn't be drawn into a conversation and Discord sank a little lower in his seat.
When he was his usual self there was always something to talk about, true it was normally ponies yelling at him to stop whatever mischief he was about that time, but it was something, but as a pony he didn't have much of a skill set to draw on.
Mercifully Applejack and Applebloom arrived with the first course, which was unsurprisingly apples. Discord lunged at the chance for a topic, "So what do you think of apples my dear?"
For a moment Discord hoped he had finally found a topic which would coax Fluttershy into saying more than two words in reply. Discord's heart sank again as Fluttershy gave another noncommittal answer "Their okay I guess," Well four is an improvment I guess.
Applejack gave a snort which caused Fluttershy to hurriedly press on, "But the ones from Sweet Apple acres are some of the best I have every tasted." The reassured A.J smiled at this praise before totting back off to the kitchen once more.
Bigmac came forward and placed two mugs of cider on the table and Discord once again attempted to find something to talk about, "Ah this must be the famous Apple Cider I have been told about, I hear it's known to slide down your throat like silk and very is good," Discord eagerly lifted his mug with a flash of magic, but before he could take a sip the unicorn thought he heard a distant 'snap', followed by an quiet echoing chuckle.
"Did you hear that?" Discord looked around fearing Rarity had returned, but he could see no sign of her.
Fluttershy just shook her head and Discord looked to Bigmac who wore a similar bemused expression on his red face. He shrugged and once again lifted his mug, watching as Fluttershy did the same. As the pegasus drank it became clear that she enjoyed the sweet and slightly fizzy drink as it drained down her throat and Discord raised his mug.
Fluttershy's face turned to one of worry as Discord began to cough and frantically thumped his chest with a hoof. As his eyes went wide, Discord's pained voice wheeze out, "Woha that's got a kick to it, I didn't know the apples made it so strong."
"Are you sure? It tastes quite mild to me," Fluttershy announced as she took another long draft and showed no ill effects. Discord eyed his mug carefully, true he had never tasted Sweet Apple cider before, maybe he just wasn't used to it? Not to be outdone by Fluttershy, especially with the Bigmac watching Discord winced as he poured the burning fire down his throat. The poor pony's eyes were streaming but finally he set down his mug in triumph.
His challenge completed, Discord hungrily turned his attention to the pair of rosy red apples. They certainly looked good and after that drink he felt that some cool juicy fruit would be just the ticket for his ravaged throat. He picked up the first apple in anticipation, but paused as once again he heard the distant sound of a 'click'. He was sure this time.
Instantly Discord's eyes narrowed and he searched about once more for the source of the noise. Fluttershy was busy finishing her first apple and about to start the second with no troubles at all. Discord, with a bit more caution this time Discord raised the apple slowly to his mouth and suspiciously took a tiny bite of it.
The fruit was so sour that Discord felt his lips suck in on themselves and despite his best effort he couldn't spit out the offending chunk of poison. He looked at Fluttershy through running eyes to see the pegasus devouring her fruit with every sign of enjoyment.
Left with little choice Discord was forced to swallow once again and the lump of 'hellfire' stung his throat all the way down. Placing the offending apple down with care Discord took a moment to catch his breath (along with double double checking his tongue was still there) before slowly raising the second morsel to his muzzle and sniffed.
This one smelled fine also and no matter how hard he listened there was not sounds of distant laughter or snapping fingers. Cautiously Discord opened his jaw but before he bit into the suspect fruit his nerve failed him, "You know I think I'll save some room for the main course." Aha on to you Rarity, your not going to catch me out this time. I have been at the 'pranking' game far longer than you my dear.
Fluttershy stared at Discord in disbelief, "Are you alright Discord, these apples are the best I have ever had. Well if you're not going to," To Discord's amazement the normally timid Fluttershy leant over and grabbed the apple before Discord could stop her. Discord screwed his eyes shut expecting to hear sound of pain and disgust as Fluttershy bit off half the apple in one go and chewed with enthusiasm.
Discord winced as the filly made a strange noise and feared the worst, Fluttershy didn't deserve whatever Rarity had aimed at him, but to his dismay the filly gave out a contented sigh, "Oh my this is the best one yet! Oh Discord I can't believe you wouldn't try it!" Without pausing to offer some to Discord, Fluttershy consumed the rest of the apple with almost unseemly haste and making contented sighs every time she paused for breath.
"Well it's grand ter see somepony like's our wares." Discord whipped around to see Applejack glaring at him and the stallion was certain he caught the distant sound of cackling on the breeze.
"Two/love my dear, oh you really should have chosen some other pony to exchange with. My this is spectacular fun and I could honestly see myself getting used to this," Rarity's voice echoed in Discords head.
"Don't count on it, sundown isn't that far away," Discord grumbled under his breath.
"Pardon I didn't catch that?" Applejack asked in a suspicious voice.
"I said: I wanted dear Fluttershy to enjoy your treats, only the best for her today," Discord responded in a much louder tone.
"Awww that's mighty sweet of you Discord, I guess yer aint that bad after all," Applejack winked to Fluttershy who smiled timidly. "Bigmac grab the main course, I recon these two'll be ready fer some real Apple Family cookin!" The red stallion nodded and A.J went towards the house, leaving Discord glancing around with a hunted expression.
"Are you sure you're okay Discord? You look distracted," Fluttershy asked with genuine worry in her voice.
"Oh I'm fine, just enjoying the feel of the cooler air, this place is wonderful when the is settling no?" Discord quickly peered under the table before looking back up to Fluttershy who smiled sweetly.
"You know Discord this is actually kind of nice, thank you for suggesting it. It seems you're just a lively and unpredictable as a pony. It's been sometime since I was taken out for dinner," Fluttershy informed Discord as she stared at the departing Apple family members. When she looked back Discord was smiling sheepishly.
"Your most welcome my dear, after all you've done for me it's the least I could do," Despite Rarity's interruptions Discord found he really did enjoy the simple pleasure of spending time with his first true friend. He heard the echoing yawn of the draconequus in his head once more, but found he didn't mind all that much.
Very soon A.J and Bigmac returned with two plates covered by cloths. Discord's unease rushed back with them, it was a good guess that Rarity was out to make this little get together the worst night of Discord's pony life and he braced himself for the onslaught of trickery.
All things considered the evening went fairly well in Discord's opinion. Sure there was the moment when his bread had attempted to strangle him, or when his pudding turned into coal in his mouth, but overall Discord actually found himself enjoying the evening immensely.
As the day began drawing properly to a close Discord even got a chance to dance with Fluttershy in the fading light. Granny Smith had gotten out her old banjo and played a country tune where all the family joined in. As the sky began to darken further hundreds of candle bugs began to buzz about, filling the glades with early stars.
After thanking their hosts for the wonderful evening Discord walked Fluttershy home and with the sun just peeking over the horizon Discord bid Fluttershy a fond goodnight as she entered her cottage. The lucky pony even earned a small parting peck on the cheek for his efforts and Discord trotted back down the path with a little bounce in his step.
With out anywhere in particular to go Discord settled down quietly at the end of Fluttershy's pathway and watched the sun's last golden rays glimmer as if in welcome to the moon. Luna's orb was just starting to make it's steady way skywards as a bright flash behind Discord announced the arrival of Rarity. Once the meal had concluded the she had been silent and Discord assumed Rarity must have wandered off to find something else to do.
She gave a gentle sigh as Rarity shared the magical sight of the sun going to it's rest, "So how did you like being a unicorn, was it every thing you hoped for?" Rarity asked with a slight grin, her blue eyes sparkling in the failing light.
"Well it's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't want to live there," Discord chuckled in reply. "Thanks for keeping the chaos mulling over while I had a break, I would have blown it tonight without you constant interruptions keeping me on my hooves," Discord winked at Rarity who suddenly found her claws far more interesting than the unicorn next to her.
"Why I don't know what you mean, I was simply getting you back for the last dinner you spoiled for me. You know that soup never did wash out of my dress," Rarity found she couldn't meet Discord's knowing eyes, "That and turning me into this walking jumble of oddities."
Discord laughed out loud this time, "Ah Rarity, you're not a very good liar, I saw some of the things you dreamed up while chasing Fluttershy and I down the streets of Ponyville. If you wanted you could have done far worse to me during this evening. As you said before, you're very creative."
Discord watched as Rarity flicked her expertly managed hair, It seemed even as a creature of chaos she took great cares to maintain her dazzling looks, "Okay, okay, so I did just enough to keep it interesting. That silence was deafening and I had to give you two something to talk about."
"You would make a very 'noble' draconequus Miss Rarity, I don't think the world could cope with that," Discord chuckled once again as the sun sunk even deeper behind the curve of the world.
It was Rarity's turn to laugh out loud this time, "Oh that's nice of you Discord. True, I do believe I could make it work but it's just not for me," She grinned a miss matched set of fangs that still somehow managed to look right, "Plus you make a terrible pony and I know for a fact you have no chance with Fluttershy," Rarity revealed as the failing light seeped out of the world and the twinkling stars began to shine.
"And what prey tell does that mean?" Discord asked in an indignant tone.
Rarity's eyes sparkled with amusement, "Why she has her heart set on Bigmac, surely you knew?"
"What!" Discord cried as a familiar tingling began to spread up his hooves, the sun's rim was almost touching the horizon now.
"Did you ever wonder why such a gentle stallion would be so crass as to bash you with a spade?" Rairty asked as both creatures were surrounded in a multi-coloured glow, "He clearly has feelings for her also."
Discord blinked and gaped in astonishment just before his entire world went white. After an uncertain moment Discord stretched as he looked around the world from his once again impressive height and stared down at the small white pony sitting next to him.
In a voice back to his own natural octave Discord stared at Rarity in disbelief, "She never told me that!"
Rarity smiled up at the restored draconequus and gave him a little wink, "Well she didn't tell me either but a lady is sensitive to these things."
Discord had a sudden suspicion and narrowed his miss matched eyes, "You looked in her diary didn't you!"
Rarity blushed at this accusation, "Why of course I didn't, what kind of pony do you take me for?"
Discord smiled, "Well for most of the day you haven't been a pony at all and just happened to have tremendous magical powers at your disposal."
Rarity gave an embarrassed cough, "Well I may have taken a peek, along with the sneeking a glance at the next up and coming fashion magazines. It pays to know the competition you know and I simply couldn't have wasted such a golden opportunity." Her voice changed to sound much more understanding of the monster next to her, "Also I did get terribly bored," Rarity cocked her head as a thought occurred to her. "How did you know what was in Fluttershy's diary?"
It was Discord's turn to blush, "Oh I just found it lying locked and hidden away where any self respecting creature of chaos would need to test the security."
Rarity shook her head, having been a draconequus for the best part of the day she knew how hard it would have been to resist poking around. She certainly hadn't been able to, "Well I won't tell if you don't," She held out a hoof to shake Discord's claw, but remembering what happened last time quickly pulled it away again.
Discord's face became one of intense curiosity, "But Bigmac? How did you know his feeling for her?
Rarity laughed softly, "Oh that didn't take any great skill or magic, stallion's are dreadful at hiding their intentions from one such as I. You just have to see the way he looks at Fluttershy to know, it's a mare thing you would never understand Discord." The unicorn cocked an eyebrow, "One thing does bother me though, if you've seen her diary then why make all this effort Discord?"
The draconequus, grinned again knowing he had been rumbled a second time, "Well I'm not as unobservant as you take me for Miss Rarity. I felt they needed a nudge in the right direction too, worth a spade to the head to let Bigmac play the hero for her don't you think?" Discord was impressed, Rarity was turning out to be a very savvy mare.
Rarity nodded in agreement, "Nevertheless, no more pony swapping okay? Or next time I'll insist that who ever you swap with will make your life a living Tartarous you got that," Rarity instructed the beast before her.
Discord paused for a moment before replying, "If you insist, but admit it you had fun too?" Rarity dipped her head and peered in a disapproving way at Discord who shrugged in defeat, "Oh fine, have it your way."
Rarity continued to stare, "Say it, Fluttershy kept her side of the deal and you never finished the promise."
Discord knew when he was beaten and he certainly wouldn't let Fluttershy down. He'd had his fun and had no immediate plans to become a pony again, "Cross my heart and hope to fly" Discord did a little spin in the air while painting a red cross on his chest, "Stick a cup cake in my eye...gah." He shouted out in pain as the icing dribbled down his face, he had gotten too used to pony magic.
Rarity, now satisfied, gave Discord a little wave goodbye which he happily returned. As she began to trot home for some much needed rest Discord rubbed his chin in a thoughtful way. The creature floated in the air for a moment before he snapped his fingers and produced all the required elements for the transformation.
"Maybe just once more? Maybe a pegasus this time?" Discord looked up to Cloudsdale and wondered what Rainbow would do with all the powers of chaos at her command. Before his plans could progress any further however, a Pink blur zoomed out of a nearby bush and clambered up his back. Discord suddenly found himself confronted by a pair of large, angry blue eyes held in an upside down face.
"Don't even think about it Mr, no draconequus breaks a pinkie promise on my watch," Pinkie Pie said with a serious tone that caused even a monster of immortal chaos to pause. With this done she vanished and Discord snapped his fingers once again, causing the chemicals to vanish in a puff of smoke.
"Then again maybe not." He said to the world in general before vanishing himself. Besides there was always buffalo and griffons or even dragons to consider.......
