Gilda sat at the table alone with the soup in front of her still warm. Despite her insistence that she didn’t need any, Fluttershy and Discord had made it for her. Then, they were on their way back to town. To check on Angel, check on the others, what not. But at the moment, even sometime later, the griffon still wasn’t hungry.
Package Deal was dead. It was good though, right? That mad pony needed to be stopped, and he was. Still, the bad parts of the aftermath was digging into her head. Not enough to cry or even do more than mope at the moment, but enough to feel not so hungry. After all, it was all her fault.
Deal wouldn't have been this way if Silver Bell was alive. Silver Bell wouldn't be dead if Gilda hadn't done the same old thing in her own little tantrum against how her life had turned out. Her little tantrum spiral had done a doozy on not just her, but an entire town now.
That was enough reason not to want to eat a bowl of clam chowder she had in front of her. Maybe even a whole rock lobster, or maybe even a haggis with--ew. She was thinking too hard on this.
Gilda sighed and shook her head, she was thinking hard on a lot right now. Her success over Deal made something clear, something was happening to her.
“Are you gonna eat that?” said a gleeful voice behind her. There was no hiding from “The Snark” as usual.
“Shut up,” Gilda said without looking away from the soup.
“Aw, and we were bonding so well….” he replied with that same gleefulness, now across the table from her.
“You think I care?!” Gilda looked at the Snark in anger. “Everything's messed up!”
“Oh, lighten up,” the Snark said as he put his hooves on his hips after he got up, swaying them with a smile. It was much more red than it was a few days ago. “Didn’t you feel that piece of mind you had for a moment?” The griffon tried to ignore that fact, looking away. “Or perhaps that he would likely be having you meat cold if it weren't for that? Best served that way for him if you get my drift.” He then gave her a nudge. “Wink wink, nudge….”
“What the heck did you do to me?” Gilda demanded from the smirking near pony. “My body...first I’m never cold, now it’s like…”
“Being awesome?” the Snark added. “Like the last time, I kept you up and going. Stronger, much more durable too.” He put a claw on her. “Little by little, you’re losing that weakness you have as you become something more.”
“Something that does this like it was nothing?” Gilda shook her head as she spoke.
“I know, ain’t it cool?” the Snark said with joy.
“I feel like I’m losing my mind from this,” Gilda countered. “I didn’t care for anything, then next I can tell I’ve got blood on my claws! What’s so cool about that?!”
“Easy!” he declared back to her. “You just stop caring about these losers, just like you did before. Just give in, you already know you enjoy this change.”
“I hate you, freak!” Gilda said with quiet, toxic fury.
“You do hate me, don’t you, Gilda?” the Snark asked, still standing next to her.
“You have no idea at this point,” she replied to the windigo cloud pony.
“You hate me so much, you want me to die from it?” the Snark added as he brushed his mane with a hoofclaw. “But I only feel better for it!” Gilda sighed and still tried to ignore him. “Why can’t you accept the greatest gift I can bestow you?”
“Ponies are dead,” Gilda said dryly as she rested her head with her claws on the table. “Silver was me being stupid. The others…” she sighed again. “That was my claws, and you egging me on.”
“But didn’t you feel peace in that fact?” said the Snark to her. “Even amid that violence, you weren't scared in the least. Build that strength a bit and…”
“Don’t you even care what happens as a result?” Gilda snapped back at him. “You got me doing your dirty work. If Fluttershy and…”
“Those ponies find out you have several kills, and quite a bit of property damage on your tab?” the Snark took the words out of her mouth. “They will throw you away into the deepest pit, of course!” he added as he put a claw on Gilda’s shoulder. “The results are...unpleasant if you think of it that way. But it’s nothing we can’t handle.” Gilda rose her eyebrow, but “The Snark” only laughed.
“You were dead to them, even before this,” he continued with glee. “And I’ll help you return the favor to your, so to speak, killers. Because I’m a good friend, don’t cha know?”
“And if I tell them, then what?” Gilda asked, with a grumble as she looked away again. “You didn’t kill me when I said your name.”
“Well one, you stammered in a way that had me laugh so hard,” the Snark replied with a giggle. “And two, what were you going to tell them? To stop me after all?” Gilda knew where this was going to go. “Exactly, it won’t matter to them that I may have given you a nudge or two. It’s all the same, the results that come with it frightens you to no end.”
“It’s still your fault,” Gilda stated weakly.
“Our fault,” the Snark corrected. “We act as one on this! And when we are done, this won’t be something to worry about.” Gilda just sighed and looked back to her soup. “Don’t be like that.” he said, added with a rub on her back. “All sad again? Powerful sorts have no need for the sad, you know that. Gregor, for one.”
“Bite me,” Gilda didn’t look up as she spoke.
“You felt you disappointed him, just gave up too,” the Snark replied to her sadness. “And Dash as well, two good reasons to quit on things. Even with that lump of bird meat brother of yours prodding, you couldn't care about yourself now or ever.” Gilda only felt worse as she covered her head. “Dear old dad won’t take you back, nor will little Dashie. What use is a weak griffon nobody wants, that even herself hates her? Taxidermy comes to mind….”
“Shut up,” she replied feeling lower.
“Hate yourself, hate ponies, hate family, we’re just made for each other,” the Snark said with shining eyes. “Such sweet music we can make together. A song of acceptance of being, and crushing things that get in our way like a mace.”
“Deal went down, so did his thing,” Gilda corrected, desperately, if only to shut him up. Even managing to get that claw off of her as she finally turned to face the monster in the room. “Who said you won’t?”
“Let...me…” he drew closer with a smile, raising his hooves as they became glowing claws. ”Educate you.”
Before Gilda could get back, her head was in his claws and the world went mad.
She was that abyss again, with lights in directions. Or it could have been, but things were everywhere. Burning eyes, shapeless forms, more and more of them were idling there in one place with more coming behind them.
“This is my plan,” the Snark said, his voice distorted. “On that little holiday everyone's been waiting for, those little big guys are going to crush pony kind in ways that have me giddy to think about.”
“What?!” Gilda stated looking on, her body trembling. “How are you…?”
“Simple!” the Snark answered with glee. “All simple! See, how it’s amazing!” He pointed a pseudo-claw to the army. “With my power, and more than a bit of persuasion, I’ve gathered other windigo to one place with the same goal. Instead of going to random towns, we just go to one. And me, I mean us, softening the town up only sweetens things. They just can’t wait to eat them all up!” he cackled. “Yum yum.”
“You're going to kill them all, huh?” Gilda said, taken aback a bit. Heck more than a bit by that! The mass of masses, shapeless and horse shaped when it suited them, stood ready to dig into the meal she had, in part, made.
“Now, I know…” the Snark said in a mock understanding tone. “You’ve been getting attached to them. But, even you know that attachment is faulty with faults. They already wait for the chance to throw you away again!”
“The usual stuff and reasons, huh?” Gilda replied and knew where this was going, again and again. “Why is it always like that with you?”
“All Shy and pals need to do is think for a bit more and come to blame you, and only you,” the Snark replied simply. “Then where would you be? In some magic cell? Facing more rejection again? Even you know you can’t undo the past, and I give you a way out.”
“By killing everyone!” Gilda said, stressing that point again. “What do you have to offer to tell me I won’t just suffer more as a result?”
“Power,” the Snark said simply. “Lots, and lots of power. Enough to ensure you won’t go sad again. That blissful calm can be yours, just let it!” He held Gilda in a cold, but gentle grip. “Freedom from your pain and closer to our unfolding arms. And we will have the veils kneel to us!”
“Veils?!” Gilda yelled in confusion as she shivered. “The heck are…?”
“With mad certainty, we will rip the gates of delirium off it’s hinges!” the Snark yelled with a booming voice. “And it will be AWESOME!”
His loud laughter echoed across the emptiness of the void as Gilda now knew just how bad things had gotten. Now, all she could do is struggle to think of a way to stop it.
“Gilda?” a voice called.
The sound of a quiet voice had the griffon jump from her chair, causing her to fall out of it.
She was back in the house again, on her back, and on her wounded wing. Gilda winced as she turned her head to see Fluttershy looking more than a bit sheepish.
“Sorry,” Shy uttered as she rubbed a hoof at her leg nervously. “Are you ok?”
“You got any coffee?” Gilda said absently, but still shaken.
“No, why?” Fluttershy replied as she trotted over carefully.
“I could use some,” Gilda sighed.
She struggled to get up, now with fresh pain in her wing. But Fluttershy was nice enough to offer a hoof pull her up and, despite feeling begrudged, the griffon took it for once. The pony helped her back to her chair, pushing the bowl back over to the the griffon as she trotted to the stove.
No coffee as usual, just tea or another kettle of it. Either way, it was something. Fluttershy insisted on checking on the wing again, noting the griffons wincing after the fall. Afterward, the griffon was still at the kitchen table with the pegasus sitting next to her, holding her claw and trying to help as usual.
The soup was still there, still uneaten.
“I know you are still shaken,” Shy said as she patted the griffon’s claw. “But it’s over now, he can’t hurt you or anyone.”
“Deal can’t, yeah,” Gilda replied without much energy. “It’s the stuff that comes after I’m scared of.” She looked aside as she sighed. “Maybe even before…”
“Do you want to talk about this in a morning session tomorrow?” Fluttershy asked, but Gilda just shrugged. “Edward told me about him. I know he wasn’t always like this.”
“It’s still my fault,” Gilda said simply as she looked down. “I messed it all up...”
“I know you didn’t mean to, Gilda,” Shy reassured as she rubbed the griffon’s claw. “And he wasn’t just angry at you, he hated everyone at that point.”
“It’s still my fault,” Gilda repeated. “I got ex-friends after me, ex-bosses after me. I’m glad I never started dating. That might end the world…” She exacted a bit of humor from that part, or tried to.
Shy didn’t think it was funny either. “It’s not that simple, Gilda,” she said.
“Seems simple enough,” Gilda counted. “I mean, sure, Dash didn’t-” But Shy cut her off from her coming rant.
“He attacked other ponies and went on a rampage, Gilda!” Fluttershy countered the griffon. “You didn’t make him do that!” While Gilda was about to ask, Shy continued. “He could have stopped, he could have understood that Silver Bell wouldn't have wanted this!”
“She’s still dead,” Gilda said, still feeling horrible. “After all the crud I did…”
“I didn’t say you were blameless, Gilda,” Shy stated softly. “All you can do now, when you look back, is to try and learn from it.”
It was quiet for a moment as the pegasus stopped to sip her tea. Gilda just looked at her cup. On one hand, she could have just left for bed. On the other, how would she even get to the worst part. You know, seeing as ponies will die soon from a monster they didn’t know was even there.
“What if I went on a rampage?” Gilda asked seriously, it wasn’t as much a hint as she thought it was. “Would I still be on the “learn from it” camp then?” The yellow pegasus honestly looked shocked for a moment, nearly spitting her tea. Shy struggled a bit, but was able to swallow it down.
Oh boy, that didn’t look good to the griffon. She lowered her head again.
“Uh, too much?” Gilda asked, looking nervously away from the now blinking pony.
“I...why would you say that?” Fluttershy asked as she put her cup down.
Gilda did her best to think of what to say.
“Maybe...since I’m meant to turn out like him?” she tried that explanation. “He wasn’t able to get beyond the past, who says I can?”
“Would it help if I said I would?” Shy replied, looking to the griffon hopefully.
Gilda wasn’t sure if she should feel creeped out, warmed up, or question how far that vote of confidence was. The best she could do was thus.
“Ok,” She said as she rubbed her neck. “Why is that?”
“Why don’t we talk about it in the morning?” Fluttershy said as she helped the griffon up. “We can cover it then.” She even helped Gilda walk to her room upstairs. “You should rest first, okey?” she added.
“Whatever,” Gilda replied with some disappointment.
She was still worried how tomorrow would turn out now. As the pegasus helped her to the guest room door, she apparently notice how still down Gilda was.
Before the downtrodden griffon opened the door grimly, the pony gave her a hug and a nuzzle from the neck up.
Gilda was understandably wide eyed as expected.
“I still believe in you,” Fluttershy said softly as she trotted away, going back downstairs. Likely to fetch a dream pill.
Gilda, of all things, was hoping she wasn’t blushing. She shook her head and went to--bed.
Diamond was still there, in her bed. The blanks were in their bed of sleeping straw on the other end of the room. The griffon looked between the two for a moment and groaned as she rolled her eyes.
“Guess I still got the floor…” Gilda deadpanned. Laying down on wood was an annoyance she didn’t like, but at least could handle. “Can’t get much worse than that, huh?” she said to herself.
She would need to ask Shy for another blanket and the griffon waited for a bit. In time, Fluttershy came back, somehow as usual, balancing a plate with a glass on it. Not weird at all by any description by this point.
“Need a blanket?” Fluttershy knew what to ask.
“Yep,” Gilda replied, not letting it all faze her.
“You gave her the bed?” Shy added with some surprise as she winged over the pill.
“She insisted,” Gilda answered, hoping the pony wouldn’t ask much further on that topic. She simply took her medicine and drank the glass. “Night.”
As hoped for, or expected, Shy didn’t ask and just let Gilda rest as promised. The griffon closed her eyes and could hear the pegasus leave the room. In a moment, it would be just that place again. Even if she was scared of it, she kept her eyes shut.
Gilda already knew what she would likely see if she opined her eyes. As the sounds of the house went from some wind blowing and wood creeking, to dry leaves sounds.
She tried not to think about the other shapes on the other side. Not to think about the Snark’s little big army, or his power deal he kept pushing.
There had to be another way, there had to be in her mind. Maybe the windigos were there, maybe it was just her and that dry leaf emptiness. Any moment, she’d be in some other place, a dream. None of this crud or a monstrous thing that seem to lurks in her head.
Speaking of which, she felt something on her back.
“It’s the waiting, always the waiting,” the Snark said, next to her with sarcasm. Gilda didn’t answer him. “You can’t pretend me away, anymore than Deal could pretend you dead! Just give in, please? For me?” She still didn’t answer. “What would I take, that won’t already be took from you? Ponies are quite efficient at that, don’t cha know?” His icy hot breath could be felt on her face. “We both exist because of them.”
It fazed out then, at least she hoped it did. She really didn’t like this pressure. When she saw a clear light, she felt much safer.