Two weeks. It had been two solid weeks since Morris Cole had gone on an unexpected adventure in the land of the pastel equines. True, he’d agreed to go, if only because he’d though that the assignment was a simple transportation job… After all, that was his main source of income, the transport of items from one place to another, as quickly and covertly as possible.
Although the job had gone off reasonably smoothly, despite the unforeseen events that had transpired, Cole’s vehicle hadn’t come through completely unscathed. His vehicle, a 2008 Hyundai Elantra, had sustained some moderate to severe damage, which Cole was even now in the process of repairing.
The first thing to be taken care of was the rear suspension. The hard landing from an unexpected flight over the Ghastly Gorge had damaged the upper shock mounts, causing their press fittings to come loose. The rotors for all four brakes, and their attendant brake pads, had also seen violent use. And lastly, the bearing assembly for the left rear wheel had not fared well. All in all, a costly set of repairs, but well within Cole’s budget.
The second thing, and actually far more noticeable, were the cosmetic damages. Although the vehicle had avoided direct damage, several of the polychromatic energy blots that had been fired at the vehicle during its mad race across the desert had scorched the paint or the Elantra’s trunk, with one bolt melting a hole right through the tail fin, and a second one punching into the rear bumper. A third bolt had fried the GPS antenna that sat on the vehicle’s roof, leading to several swear-filled minutes figuring out how to replace that particular piece of equipment.
Fortunately, the Internet was a wonderful place to acquire all the replacement parts Cole needed. And, thanks to quick shipping, he had received, and mounted all the new equipment himself, taking the time to make a few upgrades along the way.
Now, his ride sported Stage 2 slotted and drilled brake rotors, and ceramic pads, plus a few other performance upgrades. The additional parts had improved the Elantra’s stopping distance by 25%, and initial acceleration by 30%. The switch from standard shocks to coilovers had also enhanced the vehicle’s turning response to a significant degree. Additional frame strengthening wouldn’t provide enough of an improvement to make a difference in the long run, so Cole decided to hold off on a full frame overhaul. And, of course, there was the loss of ride smoothing to consider…
A new set of RT tires completed the repairs and impromptu upgrades. With this last addition, the Elantra would be able to outperform anything else in its size class on the road, as well as provide a shock to any challenger vehicles it faced.
Now, with visions of a 5.5 second 0-60 time dancing in his head, Cole continued the somewhat involved task of replacing the bearing assembly of the Elantra’s left-side rear wheel. Cole’s modest, two-story dwelling was on the outskirts of the city, and was more akin to a split-level, considering that it sat mostly above its one-and-a-half car garage. A garage Cole had heavily modified into a full mechanic’s bay, complete with H-frame lift, dyno, and other pieces of automotive diagnostic and repair equipment.
As he withdrew the last bolt from the bearing assembly anchor plate, and backed it out of its housing, he heard the sharp rap of heels on the pavement outside. As he had left the garage door open to take advantage of the nice day outside, it was a simple matter to turn to his right, and look for the source of the noise.
The woman standing in the driveway, peering into the artificial light of the garage looked fairly nondescript. Tall, slender, deeply tanned, and wearing a sharp navy blue pantsuit, she cut a striking figure. Cole appraised her without outward concern.
“How can I help you, Miss?” he began.
Princess Luna Solaris, co-regent of the nation of Equestria, paused in her approach, and appraised the somewhat greasy human before her. He was tall, muscular, and had an air of competence about him. The human was wearing a pair of scuffed, yet serviceable footwear, coupled with the durable canvas trousers called “Blue Jeans” on his lower half. His upper half was clad in a bluish gray short sleeved shirt with a pocket, and there were a pair of glasses on his face. The lights of the interior of his workspace glinted off his bald head. The fact that she was seeing him in a much better-lit setting this time allowed her to assess him more closely, as he opened his mouth.
After Cole’s initial question, the woman in front of him replied in an instantly familiar voice.
“We are Princess Luna Solaris of Equestria.” She began. “And thou art Mister Morris Cole, art thou not?”
With that first phrase, Cole ran through the events of a couple weeks ago in a flash, and recognized just who it was that stood before him.
“Princess.” He replied, inclining his head. “You’ve caught me at an awkward moment, but I have some time. What can I do for you?”
As he said this, Cole placed the bearing assembly off to one side, and began wiping his hands on a cotton rag. “Can I offer you anything to drink?” he continued, making his way to a battered, but clean Keurig unit on the end of his workbench. “I have some tea, coffee, and I think one more capsule of hot chocolate.”
The princess followed the human with her gaze, but glanced back at what he’d been working on. “What manner of device wert thou working upon?” she inquired, as she took a seat on a proffered shop stool, while Cole busied himself with cleaning his hands before anything else.
“Just replacing part of the workings of my vehicle.” Cole explained. “Parts wear out over time, and so must be replaced to keep the whole machine functioning well.”
“I see. And thou art good at this maintenance?”
“Fairly good, I suppose.” Cole replied, as he pulled two clean mugs out of a nearby cupboard, and set about fixing drinks. “Which did you say you wanted?”
“Ah, We will have tea, thank thou.”
After the drinks were ready, (Tea for the princess, and coffee for Cole), the human brought the mugs over, and handed the princess of the night her mug. It was a plain white, without any adornment, though the one Cole held had a seal of a large bird against a blue background, surrounded by a golden border with words embossed in it.
Cole scrutinized where the princess was looking as he sat on a second shop stool, and gestured slightly with the mug. “Yeah, it’s genuine. Can’t talk about where I got it though.”
“We… see.” Although the princess clearly did not see, she was also too polite to inquire further.
After sampling her drink, and finding it acceptable, the princess continued. “We have another task for thou, Morris Cole, if thou art willing to accept.”
“Another job moving an item?” the human replied, as he shifted to a comfortable seating position. “Not a problem, your highness. When and where?”
The princess was pleased by the human’s ready acceptance of a new assignment, but she had a feeling her next words would be received somewhat differently.
“Allow Us to clarify. This assignment will not be one which requires your considerable skill at transport. We must begin with a brief history lesson:”
“Over the course of Equestrian history, there have been couriers. These brave ponies transported letters, items, and other objects, both openly, and clandestinely. Over time, they began to be collectively known as the “Pony Express”. However, at the same time, those who wished to intercept, or otherwise capture what these ponies carried, arose as well. Griffins, Minotaurs, mercenaries of various other races, even other ponies, have sought to take what these brave couriers have carried. And sometimes, they succeeded.”
“Those successes have grown much further apart in recent years, but the assignment thou undertook for Us underscores the fact that unless We and others who wish to transport sensitive objects in the future resort to heavily armed, and thus slow, and noticeable convoys, the era of swift, invisible, or at least difficult to intercept couriers is coming to an end quickly.”
“We have considered the possibility of heavily guarded teleportation spells as an option. However, there are some objects which simply cannot, or must not be exposed to the level of magic required for such an method, not to mention the inherent risk of interception such a method poses.”
“This is why We come to thou this day, Morris Cole. We wish to acquire your services in the capacity of teaching Our couriers how to transport items as thou dost.”
At first, Cole was confused by the princess’ pronouncement. What did she mean, “As thou dost?”
Then it hit him. “Excuse me, Princess, but are you saying what I think you’re saying? You want me to teach ponies how to drive?”
“That is exactly what We wish.” The diarch confirmed.
“… And… How exactly am I supposed to do this, your highness? I have the one vehicle you see behind me, and no offense to your couriers, but they aren’t exactly… suited to the requirements for operating a motor vehicle.”
“That has been addressed. The individuals We have chosen will be given forms suitable to operation of your human machines. Also, We wish to learn as well.”
This would definitely be something… Different. Challenging, and most certainly Dangerous. Things Morris Cole prided himself on being able to take in stride.
There was only one appropriate response.
“When do we start?”