"In the far reaches of Canterlot lie an old oak tree. Built in that tree is a log cabin. In that log cabin, there's a a little blue stallion with a bleached-blond mane and tail. One who dropped out of college, who had purchased a Maretta 92 via Saddle Arabian black market, and drank sweet tea every day. He-"
"I'm going to stop you right there." Mr. Turner said. "What are you even talking about?"
"Equestrian Spiner! Oops, I meant Sniper!" Sonata giggled. "Silly me. I always stumble over my words."
"The book we were reading was American Sniper."
"Yeah, well guess what, Mr. Tries-To-Grow-His-Hair-And-Goatee-Longer-To-Look-Like-A-Rebellious-Teenager-Again? I'm not even FROM America! I'm a pony like Twilight Sparkle and Sunset Simmers!"
"IT'S SHIMMER! DIDN'T WE COVER THAT WHEN YOUR PSYCHO SISTER DUMPED A PLATE OF BACON ON ME?!"
"Ooh, Simmers is a feisty one today!" Sonata beamed at Mr. Turner. "I'm getting an 'A', I presume?"
The following day, Mr. Turner was fired from the school and had numerous reports filed against him for the death of Sonata Dusk.