Fallout Equestria: Ashes to Ashes

by Tango

Chapter 9: A Day Off

I was lying on my back in the middle of a black, smooth plane. The cool floor felt... well, weird. It had no texture whatsoever and seemed to extent to the horizon without the slightest height change.

Above of me the familiar cloud curtain was shifting and twisting slowly, creating and destroying recognizable shapes. But where normal ponies might discover brahmin or bloatsprites in the shapes of the clouds, I saw the faces of Greenmall's deputies. The mares and stallions that had died taking their home back. I sighed and shook my head, they'd known what they were getting in to. Their own damn faults, as harsh as it sounded.

But then the faces changed.

It took me a little effort, but then I recognized the faces of ponies from Sirenville. The cloud heads were blurry, hard to see any details on. All except for one, the colt who'd been killed in the manor. Killed by either me or Lazuli, not that it mattered who did it. What mattered was that he was dead and never deserved it. He'd been in our way, brainwashed by the music, so he was taken out of the equation. I briefly wondered whether or not Siren had survived the destruction of the villa. I hoped she escaped, if only so that I could let her know personally what I thought about turning foals into mindless drones and cowering behind them.

The coolness of the ground had gone. Instead, it was getting warmer and warmer by the second.

The faces had changed again, now to Smiley, Silver Tongue and Asshole. Good. I did not mind at all being remembered that they were dead. Good riddance. Still, if this was going where I thought it was going...

Soft cracking noises started coming from all directions, growing louder and louder rapidly.

I gulped as I recognized the new faces in the clouds. Lapis, Shield and the other caravan members were staring down to me. Without the colour to tell, Lapis looked exactly like Lazuli, making it all the more frightening and reminding me I'd been responsible, at least partly. And that I still was. I owed Lazuli more than I probably could ever repay her.

The cracking noises grew to the sound of thunder every time a new fracture occurred. In the distance I could see faint light, glowing from underneath as pieces of the now hot ground became brittle and broke off.

Lightning struck from the clouds, jerking my attention back to what was above me.

It were the burned faces of the slavers and slaves that I'd incinerated. Their molten, twisted heads looming over me, lighting jumping between them and the surface, still far away but closing in fast, taking chunks of the world with them.

I didn't pay it much attention though, as I stared at the face that was forming in the clouds.

Stargazer stared back at me, his eyes devoid of life. No wonder, since they were clouds, but his expression was the same as it had been after he had been killed, and my mind filled in the details. As I saw him again I felt sorry. So very sorry that I hadn't spoken up. I could have saved him! All I had had to do was talk. Let the slavers have what they wanted. Agree to just sleep alone and deal with whatever happened next. But instead I had cowered, hidden behind some stupid promise I had made to myself. What was the point if it got someone I cared for killed?!

I curled up and whimpered as the ground crumbled and sky portrayed the inhabitants of Saltash who had been killed during the slaver attack. I was ashamed to admit I’d forgotten most of their names.

By now huge chunks of floor disappeared with every rumble, all around me the world crashed into the abyss. I was staring at the clouds breathlessly as my mother stared back with fear and sorrow. I knew she hadn't been scared for herself, or had felt self-pity. No, she must've thought she had failed in protecting me. Me, the stupid brat who couldn't keep her trap shut, and then did so for a decade.

How I wished I could change it all, prevent everything from happening. How I wished that the pony who wiped out Appleloosa would've done so earlier. Or someone else. Anyone. If something had been done against the raiders and slavers in the wasteland nothing would have happened! My mom would still have been alive! Saltash would have been a free, happy town! No more slavers capturing ponies, forcing them to work their lives away without hope.

Something had to be done still. Sure it was too late already to change all that had happened, but better late than never, right? I stood up and looked around, finding that I was standing on the last remaining chunk of only a couple of meters across. All around me was an abyss, incredibly deep, with a faint, orange light at the bottom.

I jerked my head back up and saw that the clouds had changed again. I saw the faces of my previous foes, mocking me. In response I dared a glance down and saw that what had been a faint glow had turned into a true inferno, growing larger by second. Grinning I stood up and faced the source of my grief.

I laughed as I felt the fire grow, come out of the depths and shoot into the skies, incinerating everything.

Content with my victory I looked around at the inferno. The tips of the flames were licking away at my hooves, but I wasn't afraid of them. They were a part of who I was, a part of how I was going to help in cleaning up the wasteland, starting with those Timberwolves tomorrow.

It was then that a voice I hadn't heard in a long time spoke up, calmly and confidently, even with the hint of amusement I heard the words, “Sneak attack brat.”

And then I was flung into the depths of abyss of fire.

I didn't scream when I regained consciousness, I felt way too tired for that, and my headache demanded for me to not make any loud noises. That same headache also demanded me that I stayed absolutely still and not move a single muscle. It then also demanded a hundred thousand caps ransom in exchange for the safe release of my brain. Hmm, I briefly wondered how much and what I had drunk the night before.

So I kept still, trying to negotiate my way out of the hostage situation, until we all came to an agreement. The headache would retreat slightly if, and only if, I promised to have a night like the last one soon.

Speaking of which, what exactly had happened in that tavern?

In order to determine that, my freshly released brain figured out that the best course of action would be to open my eyes. I did just that, and immediately regretted it. Apparently I was hovering just meters underneath the sun, judging be the insane levels of blinding light. I guessed the fact that the light was penetrating my eyelids even when I still had them closed, making them glow bright red, was a pretty big give-away. But hey, the state of my mind should count as a proper excuse for that.

After several more minutes of lying perfectly still, I decided to give it another try. This time however, I opened just one eye, and did it much more carefully. This approach worked as my optical nerves got used to bright light. Then, when my left eye was adjusted, I opened the right one, still with great care.

By the time the visual problem was solved, several more minutes had passed. It was then that I actively took in my surroundings for the first time of the day. I found myself lying on my back, staring at the morning sky. Not that it was really different from the afternoon or evening sky with all the clouds. The only way I could tell it was morning was because the light wasn't as bright as during the middle of the day, and the sounds of ponies doing their daily business indicated that it wasn't late afternoon yet.

After establishing that, I grew a little reluctant for the next part: getting up. Surely I could stay down and sleep some more until it was afternoon. My head felt like it could use some rest. My stomach and bladder however seemed to be determined to get me onto my hooves, trying to blackmail me with defiling my direct vicinity.

I couldn't really argue with that logic, so I unsteadily rose. Quickly I left my sleeping spot, which apparently had been the roof. I briefly noticed that there was a discarded bed-sheet next to me, with an impressive collection of empty bottles of varying sizes and shapes next to it. As I rushed down the stairs recalled Daisy and I putting those bottles there before we went and... Whoa! Severely distracted by the memory flash, my forehoof slipped and sent me tumbling the last two stair steps down. I quickly picked myself up again, happy to know that everything was still intact, as more fragments of memories trickled back. That, however, wasn't the only thing that was threatening to trickle so I made a beeline towards the nearest bathroom.

Luckily, I made it. Unluckily, it was the stallion's bathroom, and occupied. You can probably imagine the surprised looks on their faces. You should imagine it too, since I was way too much in a rush to notice anything, let alone take the time to look at faces to describe. Instead I darted straight into the nearest stall, just in time. The stallions whose privacy I had rudely invaded (not that I cared) politely closed the door behind me, for which I was very grateful.

A little while later I flushed and excited the bathroom as dignified and fast as possible, silently thanking Celestia that the toilet hadn't become clogged. Now that my stomach was empty again, I figured it might be a good idea to get some breakfast, so I trotted around the mall for a while, ultimately ending up at a coffee shop. Curious to see what coffee actually was, and lured in by the nice smells, I stepped inside.

The coffee shop was a small but cozy place, numerous tables dotted the floor and the air buzzed with small talk from the morning customers. It seemed like the ponies of the mall were picking up their lives again pretty quickly. I quietly wished they didn’t, since the sounds were rather annoying to my poor ears. I was about to leave again when from behind the counter a pegasus mare waved a wing at me. I concluded she was the owner of the shop, partly because of her location, and partly because she seemed to be dealing with another customer, a filly sized mare. I trotted over to the two, who appeared to engaged in small talk. The light-grey pegasus turned her attention to me. “Hello there, welcome to Foggy's Coffee Shop. I'm Foggy Field, how can I help you?” Her tone was friendly and optimistic and she gave me the most pleasant of smiles.

Even with the headache still hammering at the inside of my skull, I managed a smile of my own as I answered her question. “Good morning, it's morning right? If it is, I'd like some breakfast, oh and maybe try some coffee too. Otherwise it'll be lunch.”

Both of them chuckled and the pegasus went to fetch a menu while the small mare looked me over. In return I did the same to her, and discovered that some of her original equipment had been replaced by metallic substitutes. One of her eyes, for example, wasn't green like the natural one, but icy blue, with the iris making faint buzzing noises every time it dilated. At least I guess that’s what it sounded like for normal ponies. To me it resembled more of a chainsaw. Furthermore the lower part of her left front leg consisted out of a prosthetic limb, with pieces of metal, tubes and wires interrupting her sand-coloured coat. There were more additions to her, but most were more subtle than those two. All together I suspected that this mare had more metal in her than flesh, and definitely had more prosthetics than I had seen in my whole life combined.

When I brought my gaze back to her eyes, I noticed she was watching me with an amused smirk. “Never seen a cyborg before?”

I shook my head. “Well, once or twice, but never so much on one pony. How did you get all of that?”

The little cyborg mare wanted to answer me, but was interrupted by a soft cough coming from Foggy. She was holding out a menu which I quickly grabbed. I looked the choices and ordered some cereal, I'd always loved those when I was little. That was when I realized that I had left my saddlebags up on the roof with Daisy. And I didn't feel very inclined to see her just yet, I needed to sort out what happened the previous night first. Besides, I think I threw most of my belongings at the crazy flamer mare so there was a good chance that the few bottlecaps I owned were now spread over the floor if I was lucky. Most likely somepony had eagerly taken the chance to pick up some extra caps.

So I returned the menu and gave Foggy an apologetical smile. “Uhm, I think I lost my caps, so sorry but I can't pay you.”

This caused pegasus to frown slightly. The sand-coloured mare jumped in to my aid though before the shop owner could say anything. “I'll cover for her Foggy.” Then she turned to me, her mouth still curled up in a big sly grin. “It's the least I can do after that... exciting show she and her marefriend put up last night.” The evil little mare giggled at the my rather obvious discomfort and led me to a table after paying Foggy. She was very evil I tell you, even though she payed everything for me, the pleasure she took out of teasing me was just plain evil.

After occupying my seat and letting my blush fade away a bit, I asked the question that had been bothering me the most. “First of all, thanks, whoever you are. Secondly, what exactly happened last night?” Sure I remembered bits and pieces, and it didn't take a genius to figure out what must've happened given that Daisy and I went to bed together, but I thought it'd be nice to at least know what I had done.

My table companion smirked and leaned a little towards me from across the table. “I'm Banshee, and are you sure you want to know?” she asked back with a look of amusement and a hint of... I wasn't sure, perhaps admiration. Obviously I nodded and let her tell the story.

Roughly half an hour later I found myself staring at the wall behind Banshee. Do you remember the day before, when those flames had been licking the air just in front of me? Yeah, that was a cool breeze compared to the burning feeling in my cheeks. No wonder though, since according to Banshee that first kiss between me and Daisy hadn’t been the last. Far from it. Luckily I hadn’t been the only one doing embarrassing things. Boomer somehow had managed to convince Lazuli and Soft Touch to join him on the stage, from where they had treated (though Banshee described it as tortured) the whole tavern and beyond on their singing skills, or lack thereof. After letting me hear a recording she had made with her cybernetics, I had no choice but to agree with the small mare.

“And what about Swifty and Eclipse?” I asked once I was able to tear my gaze from the wall again.

This brought an even broader grin to Banshee’s face. “Did you know those two could dance?” I shook my head. “No? Well, apparently neither did they, nor anyone else. And they were right as well, can't say they didn't try though.” She chuckled. “All together those two gave everyone a quite some laughs as well, really, last night was a great night!”

I nodded absentmindedly, perhaps Banshee was right and last night was a great night. But if she was, then why did I feel so... so guilty every time I thought about it?

The cyborg mare must've picked up my confused state with her super enhanced angst detector or something, because she scooted a little closer to me and wrapped a leg around my back before giving me a comforting smile. Well, it was supposed to be comforting I'm sure, but it hardly helped. Still I gave her a weak grin back, hopefully to ease her mind. She chuckled and poked me between my ribs, causing me to yelp in surprise. As I rubbed the spot and gave her an annoyed scowl, she had the nerve to just burst out into laughter. “C'mon, don't be so uptight. Smile a little! Don't worry so much okay? You look so much cuter with a smile on your face.”

I eeped and felt a blush grow on my face. What was it with ponies who thought I looked cute?! I mean, I was just a normal mare! There was no reason whatsoever to try and embarrass me (and often succeed to my dismay) over that. And besides, I didn't really like... mares. Actually, I never really had any interest in any pony whatsoever, legacy of previous experiences with my 'masters'. Most of them had been stallions, or at least the ones that abused me. Well, they all abused me, I mean abusing in that special private manner which caused the most nightmares. But anyway, most had been stallions, but I could certainly remember the few mares who'd done the same. And at times they'd been worse.

But now, now suddenly ponies liked me. Daisy obviously, Banshee didn't hide it either, now that I thought of it, maybe that one guard from the water caravan, Shield was his name right? Maybe he'd liked me too. That actually made some kind of sense. And Stargazer? Had he felt that way as well? Urgh! This was way too confusing and exactly why I liked alcohol so much. On the other hoof, if it hadn't been for alcohol, that kiss from last night might've never happened. Hmm, food for thought. What was I thinking about again? Oh right, me getting completely embarrassed by ponies displaying interest in me. You know, this had all been so much easier when I was still a slave. Not once did I have to wonder about stupid problems like this, instead my problems had been more like: don't talk, obey and get food. Stay alive. But no, I would never ever ever ever ever go back to that. Even all those stupid awkward problems combined were not enough to drive me back to that hell of humiliation.

Banshee didn't get it, which wasn't surprising since she couldn't exactly read my mind, instead she laughed even louder and poked me again in the same spot. And it tickled! Dammit it tickled and I couldn't hold in my giggles. As I put my hooves in front of my muzzle to try and shut myself up, I knew that I was defeated, so I bowed my head and sighed. “All right, what do you want?” I asked her.

She tilted her head a little and adopted a more serious expression. “I want you to solve your problems. Go and talk with that mare of yours and fix it. Really, talking helps.”

“I don't really know if I want to,” was my cowardly reply.

“What do you have to lose, hmm? What's the worst case scenario?” I opened my mouth to answer, but she put her hoof over it to shut me up prematurely. Good thing too since I really didn't know what I was about to say. “The way I see it, in the worst case you two find out things don't work out and break up,” she continued. “You might hurt your pride, so what? If that's the possible outcome the I'd say, just go and talk. Who knows, maybe you two end up as an adorable little couple.” She winked to punctuate that last sentence. I daftly responded with a confident squeak. Okay, not so confident, more like panicked.

One way or another, she made sense and I really couldn't argue with her logic. With a deep sigh I gave in to her demands. “Fine, I'll go and talk with her. We actually were supposed to meet up at noon at that statue.”

Banshee giggled and a sudden feeling of nervousness washed over me. “What?” I asked as I stared at her.

“Oh nothing, it's just that you're about an hour too late.” I immediately jumped up, knocking over my chair and bumping into the table. Unfortunately for me, the table was much heavier than me, and my action earned me a nice bruise. Ignoring said bruise, I started to dash out of the coffee shop, but was stopped by Banshee's voice. “Wait! You didn't even finish your coffee! Or start it for that matter.”

Without replying I levitated the cup over and downed it in one gulp, an action which I immediately regretted as the cooled down liquid tasted rather poorly to me. Still it wasn't as bad as some other things I'd had to drink before so I managed to keep it inside of me. Quickly I put the cup back onto a table and resumed my galloping escape, yelling a quick “Thank you!” to both Banshee and Foggy. I was sure that the other ponies who were talking, eating, drinking and doing whatever else you were supposed to do in an establishment like this gave me some weird looks. I didn't really notice though as I rounded the corner within seconds.

After quickly retrieving my gear from my sleeping spot before rushing to the statue in front of the mall, the designated meeting spot. But there was no Daisy.

Panting, I let my head hang low. Great. Just great. Not only did I botch up my best shot at learning how to use my new awesome flamer properly, but I also missed my shot at having an awkward conversation with the mare I'd kissed. Well, put like that it wasn't too bad I suppose, but still, a good talk between the two of us might be useful. Or something. I don't know.

As I was standing there, contemplating and staring at a small specific speck of dust on the ground, I was suddenly shaken up by a short cough. When I jerked my head upward, towards the sound, I found that it originated from an odd equine who had claimed the statue as his seat.

Curiously I looked over him, mentally listing the odd things about him. First of all he wasn't a pony, but still an equine. He was old and his coat was dark grey and rough, his ears long and draped to the side of his head. The way he was sitting was not normal for a pony too, on top of the statue's back, sideways, on his flanks, with his hind legs seemingly comfortably hanging. He had his front hooves pushed against each other and was looking at me with a combination of a scowl and a smirk. The final curious thing about him was a long, thin and light grey moustache decorating his face.

“What tha matter? Never seen a donk before?” he suddenly snapped, startling me. I knew what donkeys were, but never actually seen one myself. “Thought so. Ya looked like a tin can finding one of them chicken ships.” What. I think I understood little more than half of those words, and even then they didn't make sense.

My confusion was obvious, causing him to shake his head before hopping down the statue and smoothly rolling over to me,in one fluid motion, picking up a wooden cane as he did, tapping me on the nose with it as he stopped in front of me. And that all in one fluid motion. Needless to say, I fell back on my haunches, flabbergasted and with my eyes derped. How in the whole of Tartarus did he do that?! He was old! He wasn't supposed to!

He snorted. “Hmph, youth these days. Can't take nothing no more. Get off ya flanks and tell me ya name. Dontcha know how ta properly respect yer elders no more?”

Hastily I complied, scrambling to my hooves. As I got up I noticed that he was pretty small, almost a full head smaller than me. “E-Ember sir.” In the back of my mind I was reminded of several of my previous owners and got the urge to buck him in the face and run away.

He took that urge away when he nodded approvingly. “See? That weren't hard now was it? Now we all can go and introduce ourselves all proper like.” He coughed and extended his hoof. “Ah mahself go by many names. The Janitor, Ol' Donk, That One Guy With That Fancy Moustache, How The Hell Didcha Do That, but fer now ya'll can call meh Sensei. Fancy meeting ya Ember.” He chuckled, making me wonder what was so funny. “And now for tha part where ya tell good ol' Sensei what tha matter is.”

I blinked and shook his hoof briefly. “Matter? What do you mean, matter?”

The old donkey let out a loud laugh, which quickly turned into a coughing fit. A little concerned, I extended my leg to pat him on the back, but he swatted it away with surprising speed and strength. “Ha! Dontcha fool yerself! There's always some matter when they come to Sensei! I dun even get it mahself, but it's always true. Always! Now, dontcha be all shy and speak up!”

My mind took a little while to wrap itself around all of this. A strange donkey who claimed that everyone always came to him with problems. Well, considering this was the wasteland, that was not a big surprise. Everyone had problems. Still, I'd talked to Banshee about everything before, and she'd been a complete stranger too, so I guess it couldn't hurt telling Sensei too. Besides, I was kinda scared that he'd smack me with his cane if I didn't answer him.

So I told him everything. He wanted to know my problem? Well, he could get it. I talked about every single thing that had ever happened to me and which I could still remember. From my childhood to this instant. It took me a while, and I guessed that it was already late in the afternoon when I was finally done. To his credit, Sensei kept silent and listening the whole time, though I had to poke him to wake him up halfway through.

When I was finally done the glow from Celestia's sun behind the clouds was fading already. The donkey let out a small cough and twirled his moustache a little. “That's a lotta problems ya'll got there. Also, for tha record, Ah'd also have accepted “Ah wanna learn to use mah flamer but mah marefriend ain't here.” Cause that's a problem Ah can help ya with. All that emotional stuff, ya gotta face that yerself, though Ah might set ya on a right course.”

“Wait, you can help me with the battle saddle?”

Sensei frowned and trotted to my side. He stretched so he could bring his muzzle to the side of my head before yelling, “Yes! Ah! Can!” The assault on my ears left them ringing.

Rubbing my ears I scowled at him. “What was that for?! Are you crazy!”

He nodded. “Yeah Ah am. But that ain't nothing to do with tha yelling. Ya'll seemed deaf, so Ah were friendly 'nuff to help ya'll.”

I raised a hoof and opened my mouth to object, but he swatted my leg away with his cane. “What's it gonna be?” Upon my response of glaring he rolled his eyes. “Ya'll Ember. Me Sensei. Sensei help Ember with big fire gun. Ember want?” Yeah, yeah, make fun of me being a little slow on the draw. How often did you meet a weird donkey who had no business being so agile with his age?

Anyway I sighed and nodded, might as well take the opportunity. “Yeah. Fine.” A fraction of a second later I received a whack on my head with a piece of wood, a feeling which I felt would become a lot more familiar very soon. I jumped back and glared at Sensei. “Ow! What was that for?!”

That did not faze him in the slightest, and he stated in a casual tone, “Yeah what? Ah didn't hear 'please' nor 'Sensei'. Ah offered some of mah valuable time to help yer sorry flank, so Ah demand a little respect in return yah hear? Also, just to be clear, Ah ain't no boss of ya. Ya'll can scamper away any time ya want, so dontcha get no stupid feelings 'bout me bein a slaver ya hear! Ah want nothing of that, it's distracting for tha lessons.”

I groaned before reluctantly giving in. Sure this guy was an ass, in more than one way, but he also was my ticket to unleashing fiery doom so much more effectively. Fiery doom sounded so good. “Fine. Yes please Sensei.” I responded, hoping there was enough of a sarcastic tone to my reply.

*Twack!*

Fancy that, I was right when I predicted I'd be hit with the cane much more often! Perhaps I should set up a shop, ask people to come by and pay a few bits so that I could predict how often they'd be hit with the cane. Options were 'a lot' and 'seriously, a lot', I'd be rich!

As I was contemplating future business models, Sensei gave me another scowl. “Ah toldcha, ya'll don't need to do this. Either do as Ah tell ya, or get lost! Ah'm not in tha mood for fooling around ya hear me?”

I sighed and nodded. “Okay, got it, you want me to take this seriously. Makes sense. I'll do my best.” As he brought up his cane I quickly added, “Sensei.”

Lo and behold! The grumpy donkey actually grew a smile! Sure you'd need a microscope to properly see it, but I was sure it was there! “Much better. Oh, and,” He hit me again, even though I attempted to dodge, “there ain't no doing yer best. Ya either do as Ah tell ya, and succeed, or dun listen and fail. There ain't no trying, got it?”

I slowly nodded. “Okay, I'll do as you say. What do you want me to do?” In response, Sensei grinned. I did not like that grin. Not in the slightest.

“Ah wantcha to work fer it.”

Sensei was true to his word. He seriously made me work for it. I did push-ups, galloped laps around the mall, climbed the stairs to the roof, sat together with him on the back of the statue in that awkward, but strangely comfortable pose to meditate, drank some disgusting drink, mopped the floors of the mall, cleaned the toilets, changed the bed-sheets in small motel on the top floor, had a sparring match with the donkey, lost a sparring match to a donkey, and then I did it all again, but this time with Sensei on my back. At least he had a radio with him, playing some catchy songs the whole time.

By the end of it all, it had gotten pretty dark. I was dead tired and sore all over my body, unsurprisingly, and had slumped down after carrying a bunch of debris and Sensei around the mall. With a groan of tiredness I looked up at the donkey and asked the question that had been on my mind since pretty much the start of my training, “How does this help me learn how to use my flamer Sensei?” Yes, I automatically called him Sensei now, blame the bruises on the back of my head.

He looked back, stroking his moustache with a hoof, and replied. “Hold on, ya sayin' ya'll want to learn to use that fancy flamer of yours? Why didn'tcha say so?”

As he hopped of my back with a grin I just stared at him in disbelief for a moment before throwing my legs in the air and yelling, “Oh come on! I spent hours doing stuff for you! The only reason I did it was because I thought you were training me or something!”

Sensei looked at me weirdly. “Are ya'll crazy? That was no hours, it was a training montage! Took 'bout half an hour tops. Don'tcha kids watch movies no more these days?” He sighed and shook his head. “Anyways, doing mah chores ain't gun help ya'll learn to handle a flamer. Ha! Didcha really think that mopping and cleaning toilets would help? At all?”

As he talked I developed a rather annoying twitch in my left eye. Not as annoying as what he just made me do with no good reason whatsoever though! Slowly I stood up and walked towards the donkey until we were pretty much snout-to-snout. “You. Made. Me. Do. All of that.” I waved my leg around for emphasis. “For NOTHING?!”

To be honest, I was pretty impressed that Sensei didn't even blink as I shouted in his face. Nope, instead he wacked me on the back of my head with his stick. “Sit down.” I made a move forward again, but he lifted his cane menacingly, so I forced myself to stay put. What? He was quick with that thing! And being hit in the head for countless of times at the same spot hurt! If lawyers had still been around I'd sue him for giving me brain damage.

Sensei gave me a small nod and started to trot around me while I did my best to keep glaring at him, the twitch still present but slightly less pronounced. “Ah know ya'll wanted to learn how to shoot yer fancy gun, but didcha really think I'd work fer free? Ha! Ya know, Ah'm the janitor, and ya'll just helped me do mah job fer a bit. An' sides, Ah wanted to see what ya'll could do, and Ah gotta say, though ya ain't the fastest, strongest or smartest, ya sure are determined. So, Ah've got faith in ya, and in return Ah'll help ya'll as Ah promised.”

I was still very much pissed off, but could not argue with his logic. Yes it was a dick move to make me do all of that without telling me what I was doing exactly, but it was really quite unreasonable for me to expect him to work for free. Still, I really wanted to set him on fire for tricking me, but in order to do that I'd need his help to learn how to properly use my flamer. Stupid dilemmas. For the moment I settled with accepting his help first, and perhaps then burning him. Ha! A win-win situation!

Slowly I nodded. “Fine, show me.” Immediately after I swatted away the incoming cane. “And stop hitting me with that thing!”

Ha! That seemed to impress Sensei slightly as he grew a small smirk. “Sure, turn 'round.”

I complied and he took off my battle saddle. Once it was on the ground he started pointing at every single component and telling me how it worked and how to keep it in working condition. He then explained how to aim, fire and refuel before letting me put the saddle back on so that I could try it out.

A short time and a number of burned hairs later I felt confident enough to use the flamer without problems. And during the learning process I had also learned to not let my mane get in front of the gun, lest it catch on fire. Now that that was all out of the way I turned to Sensei and gave him a small nod. My annoyance and frustration had faded slightly while testing the flamer out and I was no longer ready to painfully burn him. I had to admit, even though his methods had been dubious he still kept his part of the deal, so, yeah, I thanked him. “Well, thanks I guess Sensei. I hated doing this.” I figured that if he had been honest, I could as well.

Sensei gave me a nod back. “Ya'll are welcome Ember, 'twas a nice change o' pace training ya. Ah know ya'll be a fine janitor someday. Now good luck savin' yer friends.” He waved at me and trotted into the mall at a relaxed pace.

I chuckled and nodded. “Yeah, well, I wouldn't do it again. Ever. But thanks anywaaaaait a minute! What do you mean with 'good luck saving my friends?!” I rushed after him and entered the mall a moment after he closed the door. He was nowhere to be found though.

As I went trotting through the mall, I thought about what he'd said. Saving my friends. There weren't a lot of people who I could call that. So he meant either Fixer and Piston, which I highly doubted, or Lazuli and Daisy's gang. But why would they need saving? Today was supposed to be a day off, no dangerous business involved. They were supposed to be relaxing around the mall, taking their well earned rest. Something I obviously hadn't done, as proven by the muscle ache from Sensei's training. But now that I thought about it I hadn't seen any of them, which was definitely odd. And Daisy's sleeping spot had been unoccupied too.

A yawn escaped my muzzle as I trotted up to the roof. Last night's, uhm, lack of sleep, and today's torture by Sensei were taking their toll. Wherever they were, I would have to find my friends the next day. The moment I touched the sleeping spot I went out, plunging into a well-deserved, and thankfully, dreamless sleep.

When I woke up the next morning I quickly had some breakfast a la Ember, meaning I just went a short way into the wastes and stomped a small radscorpion. My now properly working flamer ensured it was cooked better than I could have; even with Fixer's lessons I was still a disaster in the kitchen. It was an improvement over cataclysm at least.

After satisfying my stomach I decided to go and look for my friends again. Instead of trotting around like a headless griffon though, I went to the buck whose job it was to help me. Or so I thought at least. I wasn't all that familiar with how the law worked around most of the wasteland towns.

Anyway, I headed to the security office and entered. I did not in the least bit expect to see what I did in there.

During the last couple of weeks or months of my life as a slave I'd caught the occasional glimpse of a goddess. And I'd always been glad that it was from a long way off, which in my opinion was the best distance from which to look at the things. Even from afar it had been clear that the creatures were pretty darn large. They easily towered above he largest ponies around, making them even more intimidating.

So you can see why I almost had a heart attack when I saw what the sheriff was talking with, or at least I assumed it was the buck talking, since I recognized his voice. The reason I could not get visual confirmation was because my view was blocked by a huge pony-thing. I was calling it a pony-thing is because I lacked a better word to describe it. Well, perhaps behemoth, giant or really, really big could approach the size, but they didn't do it justice.

Okay, so, here's what it looked like, or she rather. She was a mare, though that was more of a guess then a confirmed fact, at least her bone structure seemed female. Furthermore, she was big. Did I mention that yet? This was the first pony I'd seen that probably look an goddess in the eyes, hell, perhaps she could even look down upon them. At the very first glance I'd been terrified that this might have been one of the rip offs from Luna, Celestia and Cadance. I’d seen those alicorns before, back in Appleloosa. Rumour had it that they were servants of Red Eye. I definitely hoped those rumours were wrong, a slaver with those things at his command... Anyway, I had seen them good enough to notice that there were some major differences between those alicorns, and this gargantuan. The lack of both wings and horn was a pretty big clue, as was her muscle structure. Where the feathered abominations had a sleek and delicate build, this mare was pretty much the opposite. She was almost completely muscle, and there was no doubt in my mind that if she was so inclined, the behemoth could lift a box cart. Quietly I sneaked past her to get a better look at the situation, and further inspection confirmed my suspicion of her not being one of the goddesses.

Because besides all of those other features, her coat colour was also a pretty big give-away, with its bright orange colour, topped off with a pink mane and tail. Every goddess I'd seen so far seemed to be sporting darker colours, and definitely not orange and pink. Then the final clue was the way the gargantuan talked. I was pretty sure that “Poly want candy! Puny pony give Poly candy!” was not very befitting for a goddess.

Still, I had to respect the sheriff for not giving in to the pony, even though she towered over him and was... well, she wasn't really angry or annoyed. She kind of reminded me of myself whenever I had demanded a glass of hot sauce from my mom. Yes, I drank hot sauce as a filly. Yes I know that it's weird. But normal drinks tasted pretty dull compared to it, though that might have had to do with the dull tingling sensation to my tongue every time I'd drank it. Looking back, I highly suspected it to be the feeling of my taste receptors burning away. Oh well, there was nothing I could do about it. And now I was craving the stuff. Damn.

Anyway, sheriff Blue Lamp did the right thing by putting his hoof down and shaking his head. “No Poly, you will get candy after you've fixed the hole. Really, between the attack and your tendency to walk through walls this mall is starting to look like Swiss cheese. Maybe that'll teach you to use the doors like everypony else.” He gave her a stern look, while having to stretch his neck in order to make eye-contact. “Now you go and fix that hole and then I will give you some nice sugar bombs.” He grew a small smirk before adding, “And if you fix all of the other holes in the walls I'll give you even more! How does that sound?”

Judging by the hopping of the massive mare, which caused a terminal to fall off of the sheriff's desk, she liked it. My sharp observation was confirmed when she scooped up the poor buck and nearly crushed him with a hug. “Ha! Poly fix holes! Poly get much much candy! Puny boss pony be much nice pony! Poly say thanks!”

I wasn't sure whether or not to be amused or worried about the sheriff. It was pretty funny to see the pony with seemingly the most authority here being picked up like a doll, and see him flail his limbs in a panicked attempt to get out of the hug. The flailing was also a cause of worry, together with his blue face becoming even more blue and his eyes bulging out of their sockets. Yeah, it'd be better to go and save him, he still was my best shot at getting some answers and it wasn't likely that I'd get much of a response from a pony who was hugged to death.

So I tapped the behemoth's leg. Well, I was aiming for the shoulder, but couldn't quite make it without stretching. I was glad to see that the tapping was enough for Poly to let her deadly hug slide a bit, giving Blue Lamp an opportunity to catch his breath again. Confusedly the pumpkin orange mare turned her head, looking around the room before apparently remembering that normal ponies were not at eye level and spotting me. She craned her neck towards me and sniffed, giving me a good look at her face. Apart from it being huge, as was expected, she had a deep scar running across her right eye, which was covered by a heavily dented piece of metal, held on by some string and acting as a makeshift eye patch. It made me briefly wonder what in the world could have done that to the huge pony.

While she was sniffing me, I rushed to think up something clever to tell Poly, so she would let go of the sheriff. All I could think of for the moment was, “Uhm, hi.” Not my brightest line.

It did the trick though, as I was rewarded by a big lick over the length of my face. “Poly say hi puny pony!”

While the term puny pony was debatable in my view, I did not let it deviate me from my rescue mission. After wiping my face with a fetlock to clear out most of the saliva, I smiled and made a nice suggestion. “Say, uhm, Poly. Well, the nice sheriff promised you candy after fixing the holes right? And it seems you really like candy, so why don't you leave the sheriff be and go and do what he said? The sooner you're done, the sooner you'll get candy!”

Poly's jaw dropped slightly upon the revelation and she forgot all about squishing Blue Lamp, instead opting to get started on fixing the walls as soon as possible. Unfortunately though, she took the shortest route out of the office, which happened to be a straight line through the wall. I myself was barely able to roll out of the way, causing me to end up on my back as I was covered in dust and rubble from what used to be a wall. If Poly kept it up, I doubted she'd ever finish repairing the mall.

Coughing from the dust I turned to Blue Lamp, who was busy picking himself up again. “What just happened?” I asked, figuring I deserved an explanation at least.

“That.” The sheriff pointed at the freshly made hole. “That was Pumpkin Polypheme. Or Poly, as everyone calls her. She's a walking disaster she is. Sure she's got the biggest heart I've ever seen, but she doesn't know her own strength and is pretty stupid to say the least. I'm just glad I can easily bribe her with candy.” He let out a deep sigh. “Anyway, thank you for stopping her from crushing me to death. Now, what did you came here for?”

I chuckled a bit before going into serious mode. “Ah, well, I haven't seen my friends yesterday all day, and not today either. And Sensei told me that I should go and rescue them or something. So, do you happen to know where they are?”

Blue blinked. “Sensei who? Nevermind, they didn't tell you? Huh, figures. Well, you know them Timberwolves and the reward I put on their heads?” I nodded. “Well, your palls decided to go and get that reward.”

Now it was my turn to blink and stare. “Wait what? No, you must be mistaken or something. I mean, why would they ever do that? Are you sure it wasn't some other group?” I knew that the chances of another group with the same types of ponies probably didn't exist, but maybe there was! And maybe they had come along, and perhaps kidnapped all of them! And then, and then... But the sheriff shook his head.

“Sorry ma’am. Looks like they ditched you. I was kinda surprised you weren't going with them too. But when I asked they said you were too tired still, and didn't want to wake you up. You gotta understand though, the sooner those bandits are cleaned up, the better. And besides, they said they'd be back by noon.”

I took a couple of deep breaths, letting the words sink in. Okay, so they didn't want to wake me. That was pretty considerate of them. And they'd been planning on coming back by noon. Which they hadn't. “Wait, back by noon? That was yesterday! And how far is that camp anyway?”

The blue buck rubbed his temples with a hoof before trotting over to his small desk on the other side of the room. I followed along, passing by three empty cells on my way. He sat down and put down a map on the desk. “Look, they left really early yesterday. I think they were still drunk even from the night before. The camp is about two hours away from here. An hour and a half if you gallop. If they'd been successful, they'd come back by now. I told them to not underestimate those bandits. Sure, the ones that invaded my mall had been idiots, but so far, nopony I ever sent there has come back. And yes, I did tell them that beforehand.”

I looked at the map and tried to memorize as much of it as I could. “I'll go. I need to save them. Also, why didn't you tell anyone that they were missing?!”

He shrugged. “Well, sure, go ahead if you want to. There's still a big reward, but don't say I didn't warn you okay? And who should I have told it to? I don't have any more deputies, nopony to send anymore. And I'm not sending ponies from this town to rescue a bunch of drunks okay? Even though you lot did help save my town doesn't mean I'm gonna give that all up again for them.”

I groaned, this wasn't a discussion I wanted to have right now. “Look. I'll just go, and save them. Okay? Now, is there anything you can tell me about the place that could help me?”

The sheriff shook his head. “I know jack shit about them, besides the general location of their place. They seem to have holed up in a small forest, lots of cover and obstacles. Also, you'll get yourself killed. By the time you get close enough for your flamer to work you'd be shot to death thrice over.” He put his hoof on my shoulder. “Look, maybe they'll use them as hostages. Then you can go and pay their price and everything will be okay.”

That last plan sounded good, except for the fact that I didn't have any caps. “Okay. Got no caps, and for some reason I doubt you'll be paying them anything.” Blue Lamp nodded in confirmation. “Ugh, fine. I'll have to go in then. So. Lots of cover and obstacles huh? And I need to find a way to get in there quick, probably catch them by surprise.” I sighed and looked over the sheriff's office, until my gaze rested on the fresh hole in the wall. A small grin spread over my face as a plan started to form in my head. “So, I need a quick and hard hit-and-run action.” I swished back to the sheriff and put up my most innocent face. “Say, do you have some sugar bombs for me? I could really use the sugar right now.”