“Thanks again for adding the fireworks at the end Trixie. They really did add some extra flair to the performance.” Twilight said, opening the door to the Library.
“It was no trouble at all. And it was the least that Trixie could do, considering all that has happened.” Trixie replied, following Twilight in through the door.
“I’m so glad that we’re friends now. I was really glad that everything worked out in the end. What are you going to do now though, Trixie?” Twilight said, shelving a few books that she had left lying on the floor when she was rushing off to the ceremony for the delegates from Saddle Arabia.
Trixie felt an overwhelming urge that she really didn’t like, and fought it back. “Trixie is sorry,” She said, rubbing her temples. “Could you repeat that?”
“I said, what are you going to do now, Trixie?” Twilight replied, looking concerned for Trixie. “Are you ok?”
“Trixie just has a headache. You need not worry for her. As for what she will do next, Trixie doesn’t quite know. She does not have her caravan any longer, and her reputation as a showmare has recently taken a hit for…. Obvious reasons. Trixie has not a direction to wonder at this point.” She sighed.
“You know, it’s a little strange that you refer to yourself in third person,” Twilight laughed. “But it does have a unique charm to it. Anyway, if you need a place to stay, you’re more than welcome to stick around here for a while, while you get back on your hooves.”
Wanting to say ‘thank you,’ but not finding the words, Trixie felt a growing pain in her chest. She looked down, aghast at what she was seeing, for the alicorn amulet was in the place of the pain, not hung around her neck but imbedded into her very skin. Her eyes were glowing red as she looked back at the horrified Twilight and began to choke her with the evil magic coursing through her veins.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie, does not need your pity, nor your help, you talentless nopony!” Trixie bellowed proudly, then laughed maniacally.
“Trixie,” Twilight choked out, tears running down her face as she was suspended by the magic noose. “I thought we were friends.”
Slamming Twilight up against the wall, Trixie laughed. “The Great and Powerful Trixie has always been alone. She doesn’t need friends like a pathetic pony such as you. She stands above all others, proud and strong. Nopony is worthy of Trixie. Least of all, you, Twilight Sparkle!”
Trixie’s vision began to fade to black. Slowly, as the shadows crept in on the horrific scene, she could hear as though far in the distance, a desperate and elongated cry, “NOOOOOOOOoooooooo!” just as everything went dark.
………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Waking up in a cold sweat, Trixie found that it was herself that was crying out. She quickly bolted upright and wiped the tears from her eyes, to no avail, as they kept flowing like floodwaters that just couldn’t be held back. She buried her face into her hooves and began to cry.
“I’m sorry,” She bawled. “I’m so sorry Twilight. I’m sorry. I’m sorry….”
This continued for a minute before she was able to stop crying and wipe her face. Trixie sniffed once as she tried to compose herself and take in her surroundings. The Night had hardly even begun. Trixie lay upon the ground, up next to a large rock, with a tattered blanket over her body. Her saddlebags lay up against the rock, just as she had left them, her hat and cape neatly folded atop them. Trixie had chosen to make camp in a grassy field that night, alone and secluded far from any town or city. She got up and made her way to a nearby stream and splashed her face with the cold water, looking down at her reflection and examining her chest. The pain was still there, but no amulet to be found.
“It was only a dream.” She said to her reflection, hopping the words would change its worried expression. It didn’t.
The truth is that it wasn’t just a dream, it was a memory. At least, the first part was. Twilight had in fact invited Trixie to stay with her after the alicorn amulet incident. But Trixie felt the pain in her chest and could not help but feel as though something bad, like her dream, would happen if she had stayed. Instead, she made an excuse and set off on a journey of seclusion. It had been months since that night, and she had even heard rumors that Twilight ascended to being an alicorn princess. She really was far more talented than Trixie. But Trixie did not feel resentment for it. Rather, she was proud of her one and only friend for her success.
But night after night, Trixie is haunted by these nightmares and this pain in her chest. It’s not limited to incidences with the alicorn amulet either. Over the past few months, she had nightmares about all of the ponies that she had belittled, scorned, and humiliated. Naturally, as a performer, part of her performance is hyping herself up, but she realized now that she should never have put other ponies down in order to raise herself up. All of her mistakes and misdeeds haunted her dreams almost every night. She wondered for a moment, why, in all this time of these recurring nightmares, Princess Luna had not come to her to save her from them. Apparently, that was something that she did for her subjects.
“She probably feels that Trixie is not worth saving.” Trixie said, biting her lip and holding back more tears.
This was not something that Trixie actually thought that Luna would feel towards her. It was more or less, Trixie just kicking herself for her mistakes. She had gotten very familiar with doing that to herself over the past few months.
“Is that so?” said a voice that seemed to come from everywhere.
Trixie was startled at first, but then yelled at the voice, thinking it was her own guilty conscious. “Yes, it is! Trixie accepts that she has been horrible to others in the past and she has not earned the right to be forgiven. Whatever you are, Trixie does not need you to remind her of this!”
“Rest assured,” The voice said, now from a fixed location. “The only one here who seems intent on putting you down, is yourself.”
Trixie turned in the direction of the voice to see, laying atop the large rock that she had been camping up against, was a white and black pegasus. Three things stood out about him to Trixie. The first thing was the black fire markings upon his hooves, matching his cutie mark of three black flames. The second was the sheer size of him, for he seemed nearly as tall as Princess Celestia herself, yet looked proportionately the same as the average male pegasus. And lastly was his eyes. As though their color scheme had been inverted, his irises were white while the sclera were black.
“Who are you?” Trixie said with a trembling voice as she stumbled backwards from the overwhelming presence of this pony.
“Overwhelmed, but not frightened? I’m impressed. Though, that’s probably the result of that unusual energy you carry.” The large pegasus smiled in amusement. “As for your question, I am but a humble Shadow, and you may refer to me as such.”
“Shadow?” Trixie said in awe, losing strength in her hind legs and falling down into a sitting position, not taking her gaze from him.
“Now, child, it would seem as though you are suffering from a problem of sorts.” Shadow said, gazing into Trixie’s eyes as though reading her very soul. “Care to share with me your troubles?”
Trixie’s throat went dry, but she felt unnaturally compelled to comply with his will. So, with a shaky voice and heavy heart, she bore her shame and began her story.
“Trixie supposes that her problems first arose, the day that she went to perform in Ponyville…” She began.
Much time passed through the night, as Trixie told her story, in as much detail as she could. Not leaving out anything, or any opportunity to beat herself up about her mistakes. Midnight had only recently waned when she finished her tale.
“…. And the worst of it is that Trixie can still feel the Alicorn Amulet hanging around her neck, resting on her chest and corrupting her heart. That twisted power feels like it’s still there, and Trixie is…” Trixie placed her hoof on her chest and she felt a chill to her bones. “I am terrified that I’m going to lose control. I don’t want to hurt anypony again.”
“Hmmm,” Shadow said, standing up and gliding down to Trixie. He was already big, but being closer made Trixie feel so small. “I’m afraid that I may have been partially to blame.”
Trixie had a terrible feeling in her throat. “In what way?” She inquired, tempted to back away, but she stayed cemented in place.
“I was charged with the task of keeping the ancient and dangerous artifacts that the old mage had collected, safe and out of the possession of those who may misuse them, as you have. The amulet had fallen out of my possession around a hundred years ago when a thief happened to get lucky and made off with it while I was distracted with other things. I’m afraid, I failed as a guardian of the relic.” Shadow bowed his mighty head. “I am deeply sorry.”
Completely taken off guard by this revelation and the fact that this very mighty and intimidating pony had bowed his head and asked for her forgiveness, Trixie fumbled for words. “Oh, um. Trixie supposes that it is quite alright. She is sure that you had done your best. But if you are the guardian of the amulet, is there not something that you can do about it?”
Shadow had a sorrowful look in his eyes as he shook his head. “There is but one thing that I can do for you, but neither you nor I would wish it. The amulet’s energy bonded to your soul. Simply removing the amulet, as you have done, will only diminish its hold over you, but not remove it completely.” Shadow stretched out his hoof towards Trixie, an unusual and intricate glowing magic circle formed at the end. “With your permission, of course,” he said, stopping about a hoof width away from her chest.
Trixie didn’t know what to make of it, but nodded her head in approval. Suddenly, the magic glow from the circle brightened and then disappeared. Then, a glowing orb, the size of a golf ball, floated out of Trixie’s chest in a lava lamp mix of blood red and light pink colors.
Looking in awe at the orb, Trixie said, “What is this?” with a sense of wonder.
“This is your soul, Trixie.” Shadow replied. Suddenly, Trixie went pale and nearly fainted. “Don’t worry,” Shadow quickly said. “It’s perfectly safe. You didn’t just relinquish your soul to this demon, I promise. We’re just looking at it.”
“A demon?” Trixie said, horrified.
“A good one, if that need be clarified.” Shadow said, trying to give a warm smile.
“There is such a thing?” Trixie shook her head.
“Of course. I could tell you many a tale of demons more virtuous than most ponies that you may know. And that’s not to say that ponies are not virtuous. ‘Demon’ is just a term used to specify a type of creature. Black sclera are the mark of a demonic creature. But just like every other creature out there, there are good ones and there are bad ones. The easiest way to tell is by the color of their irises. The lighter the color, the more good you can expect that demon to be.”
Trixie looked at Shadow’s white irises. “Then you must be some sort of paragon of good demons.”
“So they say,” Shadow smiled. “Back to the business at hoof. As you can see, your soul has two colors. That of the magic that you were born with, and that of the amulet. It looks as though the amulet has merged with about a quarter of your soul, which is why you remain in control.”
“Isn’t there anything Trixie can do to be rid of it?” Trixie said, looking at her soul in worry.
Shadow pushed the soul back towards Trixie, and it found its place in her chest. “There are three options before you, though I strongly suggest ignoring one of them.”
“Why?” Trixie quickly said. “Is it dangerous? Trixie is willing to face whatever danger may be necessary.”
“Of that, I have no doubt.” Shadow said, raising a hoof to calm Trixie. “But you do not want me to strip you of your magic, which is the option I say that you should ignore.” Trixie’s eyes grew wide, and she was about to ask, but Shadow held his hoof up again and continued. “Yes, I can strip out the alicorn amulet’s magic in your soul, but I don’t know how to filter it from your own magic. Not only would you be stripped of the amulet’s energy, you would also lose the ability to perform magic. Even worse, you would lose all of the natural energy inside of you. Alive, with a pure soul, but practically a withered husk of your former self. I don’t want to do that to you, and you don’t want me to either.”
Taking a moment to process this, Trixie took a deep breath. “So, there are only two options for Trixie. What are they?”
Shadow sighed in relief that he was able to eliminate any desire that she might have had to ask him to do it regardless. “The amulet only contains a tainted power and doesn’t actually have a will of its own. It’s not so much trying to control you, as it is simply amplifying your negative side. This means that it is only a matter of willpower for you. You’re not at odds with another malicious entity, you’re only at odds with yourself. This makes things simple. Your two options are to either purge yourself of the negative power of the amulet, or conquer it and make it your own. Both options are extremely difficult, but bear different hardships. To purge yourself of the negative power, you need to go back to the life you lived before, and resist the urge to do anything that you know to be negative. Embody humbleness and kindness. It would be a very long process, but over time you would find that the negative urges slowly go away until they are gone completely. Conquering the power is more risky, but also the more expedient rout. Find this, Zecora, and she may help you face and conquer your inner…. demons, so to speak. When you are ready, place the amulet upon yourself once more, and bend it to your positive will. Purify it and make that power yours. In both cases, should your will falter, the amulet will infect more, if not all of your soul.”
Trixie looked at her cape and hat. She had been carrying them with her on her travels, but for weeks had been too ashamed to wear them. “At one time, Trixie would have jumped at the chance to make that power hers. But back then, she wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Even now, I don’t think I could. But more importantly, I don’t really want it now,” she said, walking over to her cape and hat. Levitating the hat in front of herself she continued. “But I’m not even sure if I have what it takes to be a stage magician anymore. Not only would I have to fight back the amulet, I’d also have to deal with all of the baggage of my past mistakes and all of the ponies that I’ve wronged. There’s nowhere I could perform where they wouldn’t be in the crowd, glaring at me.”
“You haven’t performed in all locations in Equestria, have you?” Shadow asked, hinting that he had a place in mind.
Thinking for a moment, Trixie’s ears shot up. “The Crystal Empire! It was not around when Trixie was performing around Equestria,” She looked sadly at her hat. “But can Trixie keep herself from doing somepony wrong there?”
“Try your best and have a little faith in yourself. I think you can do great if you put your mind to it.” Shadow reassured her.
“Shadow!” yelled a strange little creature who came quickly flying through the woods and over to the two of them. “We need to get going now. No more detours.”
“What is that?” Trixie said, looking at the little creature.
“This is Aislin. She’s a pixie, another form of demon. And she has been very patient with me. I must away to lands far off on some urgent business Trixie. In fact, that is where I was on my way towards when I stumbled across you out here. Funny how coincidences work like that.” Shadow smiled, though Aislin was clearly running out of patience with him. “I should be back in a few months. I’ll check in on you when I return, and I’ll see about recovering the amulet then.” Shadow began to ascend into the air. Hovering above the field, he shouted down, “Make me proud, Trixie.” And in a burst of black fire, Shadow rocketed off towards the east, the pixie keeping pace.
Trixie looked towards the north, as though she could see the Crystal Empire in the distance. With a swift motion of her horn and a flash of light pink magical energy, Trixie’s hat and cape were proudly in place upon her person.
“I will,” she declared, though Shadow was already far away, she stamped her hoof to solidify her resolve and yelled out to him, “Trixie will not fail!”