"Gentlemen," Xeno said while walking back and forth in front of his clones in the newly created evil lair underneath the Sugarcube Corner. "We stand upon the precipice of a new age!"
Xeno reached the end of the clones, all of whom had been standing in a line so their progenitor could 'strut his stuff'. With each of them outfitted in a new uniform to differentiate them from their creator, they could easily be mistaken for a line of soldiers being inspected by a superior officer. Quite the inspiring sight, really...
Assuming, of course, that the superior officer was an evil mastermind determined to rule the world, and that such a sight would be inspiring at all.
Walking back down the line of 'troops', Xeno continued his speech.
"Not only have we successfully infiltrated the single group most responcible for the defence of the entirety of Equestria, but we have finally finished the construction of our new base within striking distance against our TRUE enemies..."
Xeno paused for dramatic effect, before leaning in conspiratorially towards his clones, stage whispering the dreaded name of their feared nemesis.
"T̗̪͍̮͇h͍̥͖̱̕é̮̜̮̘ͅ C̟̟̠̬̖͜r͜u҉̠͕͈͕s̰̫̫̲̖a͙̼̼ͅd͈̲ͅe̛̦͚̯͉̮̖͎r̸̝͎̳͔̝ş̗̝̗, harbingers of doom."
Quickly leaning back up, Xeno continued as though nothing happened.
"Now, to celebrate the inaugural use of the 'Doom Lair™', I propose that we do something to fully establish our presence in this area."
The clones waited with baited breath, eagerly awaiting their glorious leader's idea. This continued for a few minutes, until it soon became apparent that Xeno wasn't going to answer them.
"Umm..." One of the clones haltingly started after the scilene became too much to bear. "What, umm... What's your idea?"
"Actually," Xeno dismissively said while glancing between the clones, "I was hoping that one of you might have one."
A few more minutes of silence reigned.
"... Anyone?"
Yet more silence.
"Aww, comon! It can't be that difficult! There's seven of us for heaven's sake!"
"Six."
"What?"
"There are six of us. We never found that other clone that Sparklebutt chased after."
"... Reguardless! It shouldn't be this difficult! All we have to do is come up with an idea that is dastardly, Evil, makes our presence in this area known, spreads fear through the populus, and, if at all possible, gets back at Th̩̟̩͈͜ͅe̞̜͈̖͙̼͉ ̬̦͈Ćr͓̭͢u̥͉̹͝s̹̳̗a̮̬̤͍d̗̪e͓̬̠͝ṛs͕͘ for destroying our old lair."
The silence was once again made president of the world, as the villain and his clones thought. This time, the silence lasted for significantly longer.
Eventually, one of the clones spotted a weather schedule on the wall, before sighing.
"Well, if we can't decide on what we're going to do, can we at least decide who's going to shovel the snow next tuesday?"
"Snow?" Another clone inquired.
"Yeah," the first responded. With a gesture to the schedule, he continued by saying, "according to the schedule, we're suppose to get a good couple of inches. I guess it's going to be a white christmas this year."
"Wait!" Their progenitor cried out. "Say that again!"
"... We need to pick out who's going to shovel snow?"
"No, the other thing!"
"We're going to have a white christmas?"
Xenolance stared at his clone with glee. The confusion among the clones slowly disappeared as they too caught on to the idea. Soon, not a face in the Doom Lair™ lacked a cheshire grin.
"Perfect!"
Pinkie watched as Xeno and his clones were setting up something in the alley behind the Sugarcube corner. The noise they were making was what had originally brought her out, but what they were actually doing had her frozen to the spot. In the middle of the alley, the clones had set up some sort of wooden cart, but had long thin pieces of metal in place of wheels. To be honest, it kinda looked like someone had taken a set of ice skates, and attached the runners on the bottom to a wagon.
Or at least, thats what it looked like it had once been. The clones had made significant modifications to it, leaving it coated with a layer of machinery. What once might have been a rather nice looking whatever-it-was, now looked like something out of a Tetanophobic's nightmare.
"Uhh..."
"Not now, Pinkie!" Xeno, who was supervising the clone's efforts, was standing nearby. Waving dismissively towards the pink menace, he told her, "just--... Just go and make cupcakes or something. We're busy here."
Pinkie continued to stare for a few moments more, before shaking her head and heading towards the door to regain entrance into the bakery. Just as she placed her hoof on the doorknob, a loud growl caused her to quickly turn around, and stare at the now living mechanical contraption. At this point, all four of her knees were pinchy, indicating something scary was about to happen.
"IT LIVES!" Cried out one of the clones, dancing a jig near the metal monster.
"Finally!" Exclaimed Xeno. "We don't have all night, so let's get this show on the road!"
As Xeno quickly climbed onto the front of the beast, the clones quickly piled in. Once comfortable, Xeno pointed with his arm, as though he was giving orders to some non-existent pulling team, while a clone next to him worked a console filled with buttons and switches.
"On Lancer, on Smasher!" The clone flipped a switch, causing the growling of the metal behemoth to grow exponentially as it slowly rose up into the air. "On Crasher and Linchpin!" Another flipped switch, and the mass began moving forward. "On Vomit, on Stupid, on Blunder and Blitze--AHH!"
With a suddenness belling it's frame, the craft suddenly shot forward with explosive speed as a literal explosion launched the craft far up into the air, its somewhat notorious crew screaming the entire way.
"... Huh..." Pinkie said after a moment, the pinchy sensation gone. "I wonder if they'll be back in time for my Hearth's warming eve party..."
In the middle of the town square, Ditzy Doo watched with her daughter as Xeno and his clones cut down the tree that had been magically planted for Hearth's warming. She thought it was quite the nice tree, but apparently Xenolance had taken offence to it. At least, that's what she guessed as she watched Xeno yell out orders to his clones chopped the tree down.
"Mommy, what are they doing?"
"I'm not sure, muffin..."
"Oh! Maybe they need a tree for something, and that was the only one available?"
Ditzy looked to her left, where one of the decorative, year round trees sat unmolested. After a moment of thought, during which time the villain and his henchmen had finished their task of chopping the tree down, she looked back to her daughter with slightly forced smile.
"Maybe..."
With another debatably-controlled explosion, the villainous sextuple launched back into the sky, tree in tow.
As Fluttershy sat drinking camomile tea on her couch, enjoying her Hearth's warming with her animal friends before she had to leave for Pinkie's party. Her animal friends were chattering amongst themselves, and the tea was calming her down nicely. In just a few short minutes, she might have mustered up enough courage to go out and face the world once again!
Or rather, she would have if a loud noise on the roof hadn't seen her relocated to below aforementioned piece of upholstery. Unsurprisingly, most of her animal friends had joined her, as it sounded like an angry wolf was up there, trying to get at them through the roof. The only ones to remain out in the open, were those that were unable to hide themselves in such a manner, leaving Harry the bear to ready a defence against the possible monster on the roof.
After a few moments, the fire that had been merrily burning away was suddenly extinguished by a gout of water. Quickly following it was one of Xeno's clones, who had the misfortune of landing on his head amongst the ashes. After righting himself with a groan, the clone looked back up the chimney with a glare, then refocused his attentions to the room at large.
His first reaction upon seeing Harry was to pause in shock. When no hostility was immediately directed against him from the bear, he gave a quick glance to the rest of the room, spotting the couch propped up on a mountain of animals, and a pegasus. This done, he kept his eyes on the bear as he yelled back up the chimney.
"Sir, they're still awake! What do I do?"
"What did he say?"
"He said they're still awake!"
"Maybe he could just ask them nicely for their presents?"
"What? No! That would never work!"
"At least I'm suggesting things!"
"Be quiet and let me think!"
A moment of silence from the chimney, during which the staring contest between Harry and the clone continued unabated.
"Alright, I got it! Just tell her to go to sleep! With a friend like Pinkie, she's gotta be tired out all the time!"
With a slow nod, the clone quickly glanced at Fluttershy and asked, "Out of curiosity, would you be willing to go to bed so we can steal all your christmas presents?"
Fluttershy, courage bolstered by being surrounded by her animal friends (and defended by a very large bear), asked the obvious question.
"W-what's christmas?"
"...What."
"W-what's christmas? I-if you don't mind me asking, that is..."
The clone just stared at her blankly for a few moments, before returning his attention to the chimney.
"Boss, she doesn't know what christmas is."
"She what?"
"What did he say?"
"She doesn't know about christmas!"
"Maybe she's defective?"
"Ask her if she's sure!"
The clone glanced back to Fluttershy.
"Are you sure you don't know what christmas is?"
"Umm... That's not a bad thing, is it? Oh, I'm so sorry! I should know what it is, shouldn't I?"
The clone stared at her for a moment longer, before reporting back to the chimney.
"Yeah, she's sure."
A long silence was heard from the chimney, before a sigh rang out.
"Figures that the crazy cat lady doesn't celebrate it. Alright, get back up here and we'll go to the next place.
"... How?"
"What?"
"How do I get back up the chimney?"
"...Climb?"
The clone continued to stare up the chimney for a moment more, before returning his attention to Fluttershy one final time.
"I'm sorry, but can I borrow your ladder for a bit?"
Rainbow was just about to walk out the door when she heard a low growling noise. She hesitated as it rose in pitch and volume. Just as she thought it couldn't get any louder, a smashing noise was heard from her living room.
Rushing to the scene of the noise, she found a set of large holes in her ceiling and floor, and a strange mass of metal on the ground below. With a shrug, she quickly fixed the damage to the house. It's not like she used her living room that often anyway.
As she resumed her trek to the door, she made a mental note to ask Rarity for her old furniture. She seemed to buy new every three months anyway, and probably wouldn't mind getting rid of the 'old, out of date, and ugly'. Rarity might even use it as an excuse to try and redecorate her entire house. Again.
When she reached the door, she was silently glad that she had built her secret shrine to the Wonderbolts in her bedroom closet rather than making a basement for it. The stuff in there would have been MUCH harder to replace...
Twilight stared at the large mass of metal that had landed in front of her with confusion. Next to her, Rarity looked at the mass with disdain.
"Rarity, I know I don't really keep up to date with the current fads, but is it 'in' to almost hit somepony with large amounts of trash as they're walking by?"
"No, no it is not."
"Oh, good. Last time something like this happened, everypony had dyed their hair pink."
Distracted from the 'trash', Rarity shivered at the memory. "Don't remind me dear. I have no idea what we were thinking."
"You and me both!"
Both the friends stared at the metal for a few moments more, before Twilight's need to be punctual got the better of her.
"Come on, Rarity. I'll clean this up on my way home. If we don't leave now, we'll be late for Pinkie's party. Plus, if we get there early enough, I might be able to have a few much needed needed words with Xenolance about his past behavior."
With a small nod from Rarity, the mares walked around the metal and continued on their way. Moments after, they were joined by a rainbow maned pegasus from above, who joined them on their quest for entertainment.
"... Are they gone?"
"I think so, yes."
The Villain and his clones carefully pulled themselves out of the wreckage of what used to be their mode of transport. After ensuring that none of them were hurt, and that they were suitably free of dust, they discussed their current options.
"Soo... They're going to a Pinkie Pie party at Sugarcube Corner..." One of the clones said.
"Yup..." Said another.
"... We probably should avoid the Doom Lair™ for now. Sparklebutt's still apperently mad at us for ransacking her library for snacks." Yet another one stated.
"Perhaps we should just hide for the duration?" Suggested the fourth of their number.
"Hey, I think I know a spot she'll never look!" Spoke the fifth.
"Let me guess. Her library?" The progenitor said.
"How did you know?"
"Lucky guess," Xenolance said with a roll of his eyes. "Alright, let's go to the library. We can say hi to Spike again while we're there."
Various cheering could be heard from the Villain and his cohorts as they made their way to a place of higher learning soon to be defiled. Unfortunately for Spike, Pinkie's party suddenly turned into a slumber party halfway through the night, dooming him to the company of the infamous villain for the duration.
"And that's why I couldn't tell you a story last night!"
Pound and pumpkin, awoken far to early for their liking, gave Pinkie a sour look.
"What? I said I was sorry!"
The sour looks only got more sour at her incomprehension of their deep-seated hatred for getting up early.
"... Is this because I didn't save you any cake?"
"Pinkie, get down here!" Yelled a voice with a southern twang from below. "Ah made apple cinnamon waffles!"