"Hey, don't look so glum. Just because I can't help you doesn't mean we're out of options." Purple Menace said. "We just have to do some digging, just because there wasn't any trace spellwork 'here' doesn't mean there isn't any altogether," she tried to reassure me. A second later she rapped the side of her head with a hoof, startling me out of my reverie. "Duh! I never even checked your pack! I mean, I 'checked' it, but that was more of a cursory search before I got...distracted. Perhaps there was something in your belongings somepony attached a teleportation spell to?" It was a better plan than simply moping around, I guess.
"Sounds better than my plan." I muttered. I would have probably said something witty, but a certain cowpony came round the bend to say 'hi'.
"Hey, Twilight, have you seen Big Mac? I need him tah take a cart to town fer repair....Fluttershy?" Ah, wonder twin number two, here to be just as confused.
"Noop." I said, twitching my ears to try to drive home my point. They were...sorta like pony ears. Aesthetically though, they were more similar to bat ears. Gee, I wonder why. Applejack gave me a once over, then turned to Twilight.
"Not Fluttershy?"
"Uh-huh."
"Not Flutterbat?"
"Uh-huh."
"Human with the changeling powers?"
"Yes to the individual, no to the changeling powers. Its nothing like changeling transformation spells, and he calls it morphing."
"Came to apologize?"
"I...don't know? Apologize for what?" This got my attention. The heck did I do? She and her brother were the ones that attacked me, last time I was here.
"That pony," she shook a hoof at me and I could swear I heard venom dripping from her words. More of a 'gonna tan your hide' vibe than a 'gonna kill you dead' vibe though. "Broke the back wall in the barn, scared the cows in the west field to pieces, and sliced one 'o mah ropes tah shreds!" Oh. I guess that's what the heck I did. In my defense, I thought I was about to get cooked up in a soup or something by crazy hillbillies.
"In my defense-" I started.
"Ah don't want none 'o yer excuses missy-"
"-mister." I interrupted, gaining a scalding look. Seriously, the heck did I do to piss her off so much.
"...Missy,"she continued, apparently trying to get a rise out of me. "Ah just want yer word ain't none 'o this gonna happen again. And then ah want yall tah make it up by fixin' the wall, and payin' fer the rope ya done destroyed." She said with a satisfied nod.
H-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-h-heeeeeeellllllllllllll no.
"I'm sorry, but no." I wasn't going to take this. I may not be a saint, but I don't deserve this kinda shit. Applejack's face was filled with surprise that quickly turned to anger.
"You busted a hole in mah barn!"
"Your brother attacked me, and then tied me up." I said, trying to keep my voice as level as possible.
"You destroyed mah rope!"
"See my previous retort."
"That don' cut it! You gotta pay fer what yall wrecked!" By now, she was red in the face. And not the 'cute blush' red. The ohmygawdgonnabustacapinyoass red.
"Pay? I can pay? Oh gee, would you rather I payed in dirt clods or pocket lint? Cause I got tons of both of those!" I yelled the last part, and I will admit something at this point. Fluttershy's voice is adorable. Fluttershy yelling, is terrifying. Apparently both Purple and Appleprick weren't used to that, if the cowed looks they both wore were any indication. Purple managed to push through her trepidation though.
"Girls! Shouting at each other wont get anything done. How about we settle this over lunch?" I will admit, I stared openly at Purple menace. She seemed rather...calm overall? To see her flustered was...something new.
"Fine." I muttered, gaining me a look from Appleprick.
~----------------------------------------------------------------------------~
Where the hay did she get the nerve? She...HE trespassed on the farm, uninvited, and then caused damage to the property! Not to mention spooking her sis and the cows to bits. Mooriella said over half the herd was still too unsettled to even produce any milk! And then...AND THEN there was the matter of the slimy bellied snake ruining her favorite lasso. He cut it to pieces! And now she didn't even have the decency to clean up her...HIS own blooming mess!
Applejack shook her head, trying to clear it of her angry thoughts. Twilight had led them to a deli in town, and the three had sat down at one of the outside tables. Flutter-no, HE had seemed confused at the menu, even confessing he couldn't read it. Applejack had gotten a self-satisfied internal smirk at that. Even with how 'small-town' and 'backwards' most ponies thought her and her family (Rarity and all her uppity canterlot lot), even they weren't illiterate. He eventually settled on a Caesmare salad(having had Twilight read the selections off to him) and an iced tea. Applejack had gotten a triple lily wrap, and Twilight settled for a simple daisy sandwich.
Twilight tried to get them to talk, so Applejack leapt back into her main point. "Yall gotta pay for what yall done."
"I ain't done shit." Flutterbat replied. Applejack flinched at the sight and sound of her usually demure friend not only cussing, but with her face twisted into a horrible grimace. It certainly was disquieting, to see her friends face used by another.
"Yall spooked the cows-"
"I never even so much as SAW any cows."
"Yall wrecked the back wall 'o the barn-"
"That wood was wrecked by termites to begin with, and I though I was about to be killed, so sue me."
"Why did you think you were about to be killed?" Twilight asked with worry filling her eyes and voice. Couldn't she see he was only trying to gain her support? Seriously, Twi' was a bright mare, but some times Applejack was sure she wouldn't even be able to tell it was wool what was pulled over her eyes.
"Oh, I dunno," Fluttershy's voice noted, sounding slightly bored. "Maybe it was because someone-"
"-pony" Applejack interjected, the least he could do is speak right, right?
"Some-ONE," Flutterbat frozily said. He was probably just trying to get a rise out of her. "-attacked me not a minute from my...from when I first got here. Then? When I woke up from your brother beating the shit out of me? I found myself tied to a post in a freaking barn. You know who does that where I'm from? Serial murderers and rapists." Flutterbats voice had dropped to a deadly pitch at this point, and Applejack could see a vein pulsing beneath the skin on her forehead. "So can you imagine how friggin scared I was at that point? So you can just take your sodding rope, your bloody wall, and shove that where the sun don't shine lady!"
Applejack sat there, stunned. Sure she hadn't put into account what he had been feeling at the moment, but that didn't mean he still didn't have to deal with what he had done. Applejack turned to Twilight to try and get her support, but stopped when she saw her face.
She had a terrified expression, her eyes wide with horror.
"Serial? But but but...that means...you not only have murders where you're from...you have ponys that kill more than once?"
"You don't have murders here? Lucky." Flutterbat stated(Applejack realized referring to him in such a manner wasn't normal, but he hadn't really seen fit to give them his name.). Twilights eyes teared up, and she worked hard to suppress a sniffle.
"Thats...thats horrible. And you...actually want to go back there?" Hoo waitaminute. He couldn't leave without fixin' what he broke!
"Hold on there, ya can't jes leave!"
"I swear." He said in a low growl, massaging the sides of his head with his hooves. "If you bring that shit up one more time I'm gonna hit you as hard as I freaking can, right in the face."
And now he openly threatened her? Well at least now she'd have Twilights support on this, no way she'd sit back and watch as she was openly threatened in such a fashion!
"There's no need for such language...uhhh.....Flutterbat."
Hah! Even Twilight called her that! Guess it weren't that much of a stretch.~ Wait, why is Twilight giving ME a disapproving look?
"But I do kinda have to side with him on this matter. He was in an unfamiliar location, and immediately attacked. If he really comes from a place where-" Twilight shivered as she tried to voice her concern. "where things like murderers are apparently common place?" She looked at Flutterbat, fishing for a response.
"They aren't uncommon, if that's what you're asking." He said as he sipped from his tea.
Twilight suppressed another shiver, continuing. "Then his response upon being rendered unconscious and tied up is rather lax. In my opinion. He cut the rope he was tied up with, so obviously he had access to some sort of weapon. If he had wanted to retaliate, he very easily could have. Instead, he apparently just decided to run. One thing I don't understand though..." she took a long sip from her lemonade, "From what Applejack told me, after they caught back up to you, you did a morph? Past that point, you had a sort of lackadaisical....attitude. What changed from being scared for your life to prancing around Ponyville without a care in the world?"
"Well...um." Hah, he looked like he was tryin' to spit out a frog. "Where I'm from, we have ponies...but they aren't...intelligent? Sentient? They can't talk, they only live out in the wild, in herds. My species is the only developed one." Well there was a laugh. Ponies not able to talk? That was a long lark.
"Are they sapient?"
"What?"
"Do they have the ability to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight, with good intentions?" Twilight rattled off. Flutterbat's face looked like she just tried to explain magix quasar mechanics to him. Applejack remembered how when she had explained to her on the train, she had fallen asleep. Gotten an earful, too. Applejack grinned to herself, knowing his next response was probably going to be 'what?' or 'huh?'.
"Um, no. They only have herd instinct, as far as I know. They graze, they move from place to place, and they make little babies to continue the cycle. They're just animals."
"Oh." Twilight looked down at the table. "I'm sorry, I kinda interrupted your explanation for your mood switch. If you'd please continue?"
"Uh..yeah. Anyway, I thought some crazed hillbilly had tied me up in a barn somewhere, but when I saw you and your brother..." He trailed off, mimicking Fluttershys habit of hiding his face behind his mane. It might have been endearing, if Applejack wasn't still cross with him. "Well I...thought I was dreaming. Okay? Never actually seen a talking horse before, you know?"
"Your food, madams?" Said the waiter as he placed their meals on the table.
~---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------~
"Your food, madams?" The prissy dressed waiter asked in his french accent. How the hell do ponies have french accents? Whatever. He had brought our food, and by god my stomach was shouting at me to put something in it. I would excuse his lumping me in with the 'madams' just for that small grace. Twilight dug into her sandwich, levitating it with her freaky unicorn magic. Appleprick just lowered her surly face and bit into her wrap. They didn't provide me with a fork, so I just copied Appleprick.
Salad. Yummy.
Now I don't have anything against veggies. I freaking love broccoli. Pretty much anything but cooked spinach is fair game. Caesar salad is always good.(even with this worlds punned up version of the name) I guess I just kinda wanted...something like a pizza or something. The salad was good, but it was kinda bland. Oh, my kingdom, my horse for a savory meal.
"How the hey could yall think you was dreamin'?" Oh great, Applepricks trying to convince me I'm in the wrong again? joy.
"Again, you seemed like you were impossible. Like something I'd only be able to see while dreaming."
"So between then and now," Twilight started, wiping her mouth with a napkin(seriously? she eats fast.) "Whats happened to make you think this isn't a dream? If you have, that is."
"Uh...I think it was around the time that thing in the forest tore off my leg." I managed to get a queasy look out of both of them. "Pain doesn't happen in dreams right? That pretty much convinced me." I reasoned.
"Speaking of, I can't help but notice how you DON'T look like you're missing a limb..." she trailed off, and I could tell what the unasked question was.
"Morphing, as far as I know, " I muttered around a mouthful of greens. "uses the blood to make the form. Injuries aren't written on someones DNA, so they don't keep. Of course, that doesn't really track with hair and the like..." I batted a long lock of pink hair away from my eyes, "length and so on shouldn't be a factor either. All things considered, I should be bald."
Appleprick let out a snort, "Can yall say that again? When mah friend Rarity is around?" Ah yes, Rarity. The element of Generosity, and the only person who in my opinion shouldn't have her element out of the shows main six. She was a SHOPKEEPER. it was her JOB to be GREEDY. THATS THE POINT OF A SHOPKEEPER. To sell stuff. For MONEY. To continuously get MORE MONEY.
"Going to drop the wall and the rope?"
Her face immediately took a disgruntled tone again. "Yall fergot bout the cows, and no." Stubborn nag.
You know what? She wasn't going to drop this. She was going to continue to annoy me till I snapped. I don't like backing down, but I'd rather get this shit out of the way as opposed to having to deal with 'crazy mare'. I couldn't pay her for the rope, and I have no idea what the hell I was supposed to do about friggin cows. I only broke two boards though. Hammer, few nails, a couple new boards, and I'd have this whole mess behind me.
"Fine, you know what, here's the deal. Since I don't want to have to deal with your bullshit any longer than I have to," both of them seemed a little startled at my language,"I'll fix your damn wall. YOU will pay for the supplies and tools to fix said wall. Nails, and boards. I assume you have a hammer already, otherwise you will buy one of those too for me to use. I don't have any money to buy a new rope, and I have no idea what you expect me to do about your cows. We got a deal?"
She looked down at the table, and I could tell she was thinking about my offer. "You'll go an' talk to the cows, make 'em realize yer nothin' scary so they'll all calm down." Wait, were the cows people too? The hell were they doing in a field then? Were they slaves? Shit that's weird. "Then, yer gonna fix the hole in the barn. I'll supply yall with the tools and stuff, and then you'll paint the barn so it matches."
Hell no.
"Then yer gonna work off yer debt, got it?"
"Ahem. Yes to the cows, yes to the fixing, hell no to the painting and the additional work."There, my position was easily cemented.
"Fine, no painting, but you destroyed a top quality rope, you NEED to pay me back fer that. And iffin ya don't have any money, then yall gotta work it off, got it?" Sonova...fine. If it would get her bitching off of my back...
"Fine." I muttered through a mouthful of salad.
"Good, ah'll see yall tomorrow, back on the farm bright an' early." She said with a smile on her face.
Appleprick had by this point finished her food, so she gave Twilight her best goodbyes. She left and soon afterward Twilight and I were heading back to her crystal mansion, to look through my belongings. And If I was able to just up and leave before tomorrow, all the better.