CHAPTER 15
Recovery
When I reflect on the things I've done in my life so far, I like to imagine that I am a good, friendly, and caring pony, willing to help those out in need of it. But in the past five months of my life, that all changed, and my life took a steep downhill spiral into madness.
I had lost those close to me, seen my home destroyed, and committed horrendous acts that I thought I would never be able to forgive myself for. True, I had already killed General Brick with his own gun, but I like to think of that as self-defense, if I were not in that position, I’m sure I would not have done as I did.But my acts in the Everfree Forest, shocked me to my very core, true I had committed acts of violence as a colt, but they never got passed hitting a fellow schoolmate for taking my toy during playtime or something along those lines. But I had never committed such a hateful act, such as murder in cold-blood, which was something I always thought was beyond me.
The entire ride home from the wreck, I had remained silent as I stood at the window, watching the forest pass us by. On multiple occasions my friends had tried to comfort me, but my mind was too far gone to pay attention of them.
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After we had returned to the Monastery, we were greeted by Luna and Iron Star, who had congratulated us on our success, but they had not known what had really happened. After we had told them, the injured had been quickly escorted to the medical wing, where they would heal their injuries, despite almost all of us coming out of the battle relatively unharmed, aside from some bruises, cuts, and burns, not every pony had been unharmed.
Those of the crew who had been injured, had been taken to the infirmary where the doctors and uses used a combination of modern medical practices and magic to heal them. Vapor had been brought it so that her gash could be cleaned and stitched, which would prevent her from flying for a while. But River was immediately rushed into surgery to remove the bullets and stitch the wounds.
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As I lay there in my room, simply staring at the ceiling, my hoof toying with the medallion as I twirled it around. I suddenly heard a pecking sound coming from my window, I managed to sit up push myself out of the bed, and walk over there. As I removed the curtains I saw a familiar feathered friend sitting on the sill staring at me through the glass.
My eyes widened open as I recognized the feathery creature as the hawk that had come to start following me around. I opened the window and smiled lightly, “hey there, have you been following me this entire time, these past few months?” I asked her, she simply chirped at me and flew into the room, landing on the foot of my bed and chirped at me again. Despite the cool air coming in, I walked over to her and raised out my hoof, and much to my surprise, she nuzzled up to it, chirping softly.
I took my hoof away, “how did you find me here…winter?” I asked, calling her by the name I had given her when I first saw her. She chirped again, and even though I couldn't understand her, she made it known that she had been following me for quite some time after Ashen.
As I stroked her soft feathers some more, she chirped happily and rubbed my hoof, “you really like me don’t you? Well…I think I can talk to Luna and have she let me keep you, how does that sound?” I asked her. She simply shook her black and grey feathers at me, and squawked happily, only making me smile wider.
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Not long after that surprise visit, I left my room to go visit River in the clinic. I had been in the lounge area for hours on end asking about her, before Luna finally convinced me to get some sleep, which I had done before meeting Winter again. The young hawk stayed in my bedroom while I went down to the clinic. During my absence all my friends had been there to see her, but she had yet to wake up from the surgery, which only worried the doctors more.
As I walked into the clinic, I saw the doctor talking with one of the nurses, and as I walked in, he turned to me and smiled slightly. “Ah Frost, nice of you to come back, I take it you’re here to see River?” he asked with a smile, I nodded and walked with him. “Yes, how is she?” I asked him as we walked along the hall.
“Well, her vital signs have returned to normal, but she still hasn’t waked up yet. The drug we used during the surgery was only meant to keep her knocked out for a few hours, but she is still asleep. Maybe a visit from you will help, from what I hear, she is quite fond of you” he said with a sly smile, which only made me blush slightly.
After making my way down the hall, we came up to one of the rooms, he calmly opened the door and let me in, before closing it behind me. The room was fairly simplistic, filled with all the things a normal hospital room would have, there was the steady beeping of the monitors, as well as the sound of steady breathing. My gaze came up to her, she was lying on her back, dressed in a patient’s gown, various tubes connected to her fore hooves, her chest slowly heaving up and down.
I sighed sadly as I walked up to her bed, I looked down at her hoof, one was draped alongside her, the other crossed over her chest, instantly my hoof reached and grabbed hers. I sat there for a moment as my eyes began to tear up, my mind flashing back to that moment, when she dived in the way and took two bullets for me. If only I had been more aware, she wouldn't be in this situation.
As I watched her sleep, I heard the door open again and a set of hooves cross the room, my first thought was that it was the doctor, but instead I heard a familiar voice. “Hmm…glad to see you finally came down, I thought I would find you here” Aurora said as she stepped beside me, placing a hoof on my shoulder, which made me tense up slightly. “Frost I’m sorry, this is my fault, don’t beat yourself up over something you had no power over” she said in a comforting tone. My mind immediately flashed back to my second encounter with Midnight star, who had said something similar.
“You cannot blame yourself for something you had no power over…for something you were not meant to stop” his words echoed in my mind.
Finally, after a few moments of silence, I found the right words to speak. “I promised her father I would be there for her, if only I had been more aware, I could have stopped this. If she were to die…I would never forgive myself” I said as a single tear draped down my cheek. Aurora sighed sadly and then reached out with her hoof, placing two badges on the bed, “I was talking with Iron Star and Luna, and we all believe that you and your friends are ready. I know you may not be in the mood to talk right now, but when you’re ready, Luna wishes to speak to you in her study. But for now…I’ll leave you two alone” she said as she made her way to the door, but before she could grasp the knob, I spoke up again.
“When we first met a few months ago…why didn't you tell us the truth then?” I asked her, looking back at her over my shoulder, I didn't need to see to know she stopped dead in her tracks, she froze for a minute but sighed sadly and looked down. “You should know that I’m not ashamed of who I am or my past. I’m ashamed that I haven’t lived up to the expectations that were set before me, like you, I've lost much of my family to this war” she said with her tone dripping with sorrow and regret.
I slowly stood up and turned to her, she looked back at me, her eyes glistening with decades of regret. “You saved Vapor from falling, I was suspicious at first, considering that your taller than a normal mare would be at your age. You’re no normal pony, are you? You a…an Alicorn” I said, she stared me in the eyes for a moment. Before she sighed and turned to face me, “your right, I should have told you and the others months ago, but I wasn't sure how you would react, not many ponies here know my secret” she said as she unhitched her coat and let it slid off her shoulders, revealing her full pink-coated body to me.
She took a deep breath, and expanded the appendages at her side, reaching a majestic length, they closely resembled that of the late Princess Cadence. As I watched in awe, she stared at me with a small, nervous smile, but I wasn't done. “Not just any Alicorn…you’re the daughter of Princess Cadence and Prince Shining Armor” I said in a confident tone. She frowned slightly and looked at her wings.
“It’s true…I am the living heir to the Crystal Empire’s throne. I fled with Princess Luna after my parents stayed behind to fight, until they were murdered in cold blood by the King himself. The reason I have kept it a secret from most…is because I feel ashamed that I haven’t lived up to my true purpose was meant to. Royal blood flows through my veins, but I have no throne or crown. I’m much like Luna, we have both been forced to leave our throne’s to survive, but until the King is stopped neither of us can return to our throne” she said tucking her wings back down and lowering her head.
I stared at her for a minute, and although I might never understand loss like she has, I smiled and walked up to her, lifting her face up to my level. “I know what it feels like to think you've let somepony down, but if there’s one thing I know, it’s that no matter how bad things can get, something good can come out of them” I said with a comforting smile. It felt weird that I was giving advice to a mare who surpassed my age by decades, but she smiled warmly at me and nodded.
With that, I walked back over to River’s bed, and held her hoof again. Aurora put on her coat again and walked over to me, smiling as I watched her sleep. “You care gratefully for her, don’t you?” she asked me, I chuckled lightly at her comment, “well, when your friends with somepony for so long, you can’t help but care for them, she’s my closest friend after all” I said with a warm smile, as I held her hoof in mine.
Aurora chuckled lightly back, “maybe it’s something more than that…” she said with a smug tone, I looked up to her with a confused glance. “What do you mean?” I asked her, she scoffed and looked at me and then her. “You are not very subtle. I may have only known you for a few months now, but I can tell when a pony is in love, and I've seen the way you look at her, and the way she looks at you too” she said with a calming tone. I would have said something smart at first, but then I realized she was telling the truth.
Was I in love with River Blue?
For the longest time I had thought of her as a friend, but Aurora made a good point. “Plus, a pony only goes to lengths like that, if they care greatly for them. River nearly gave her life to save yours, and you went to such great lengths to protect her, trust me I know these things” she said as she walked towards the door and opened it and began walking out, but not before saying one last thing.
“Plus…being the daughter of the Princess of Love…does have its advantages” she said before closing the door behind her. With her words fresh in my mind, I looked back at River, her slowly rising form, her soft gentle breathing, and for the first time, I finally realized just how beautiful she truly was. I smiled to myself and grabbed her badge and placed it on the nightstand.
Just as I did so, I heard a small moan come from the bed, and I immediately turned around to see River’s eyes flutter open gently. I went back to her side and grabbed her hoof, “River?” I asked slowly, I watched as her eyes adjusted to the light, she slowly sat up in her bed and looked around, rubbing her head in pain. Soon, her gaze fell on me and she smiled widely. “Frost…” she said in a semi-weak voice, but I saw tears begin to form in her eyes.
As she fully adjusted herself on the bed, I lunged forward and wrapped her in a hug, as tears threatened to pour down my face, I smiled as I could feel tears hit my shoulder. “Thank Celestia you’re okay” I said as I pulled away from her, she smiled back and relaxed on her bed, the pillow providing proper support.
“Yeah…what happened?” she said rubbing her head, I smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding her hoof. “well….after you were shot, we managed to get out of there with the crew, we came back here and they rushed you into surgery, they managed to remove the bullets, but they said you would be weak for a few days.” I said with a smile, she frowned slightly and rubbed the scar on her chest and side.
“Weird…the last thing I remember was telling you to get out of the way…and then…” she said trailing off, but I squeezed her hoof slightly and she looked up at me and blushed slightly. “Listen River…the entire time you were asleep, I…I was going crazy at the thought of losing you…if I lost you, I don’t know what I would do, I would probably lose my mind” I said with a light chuckle, she chuckled in return and cleared her throat.
“Yeah…I guess I was feeling the same thing. When I saw those ponies about to shoot you, I guess I just acted on instinct, I was so afraid I was going to lose you…” she said as her blushed deepened. I moved a little closer, and sighed heavily and turned away, “”listen River…I don’t know if I could go through that kind of shock again…not with your or any of our friends. I care too much about you” I said with a slight frown on my face. I could see River gasps slightly and look at my hoof and squeeze it tightly, before looking back up at me again.
“You…you care about me that much…?” she asked with tears beginning to for in her eyes. I took a deep breath and nodded firmly. “River…I can’t imagine my life without you, and since neither of us know how long we can live out this war, there’s something I need to tell you” I said as I leaned in close to her, both our cheeks burning a bright red, but she instinctively leaned forward as well.
“River…I love you” I said as I leaned forward and pressed my lips to hers, I could tell she was shocked at first, but she eventually wrapped a hoof around my neck and deepened the kiss. This wasn't any friendly or congratulatory kiss, this was an honest to Celestia real kiss. I could feel tears trickle down my cheek with happiness. After a few minutes of that, we separated and looked into each other’s eyes, both finding the same thing.
Love and Passion.
“I love you too Frost, and I promise to always be with you” she said as we learned our foreheads together, rubbing our horns together, as was the traditional sign of unicorns in love. “And I promise to always be with you as well, and always look after you” I said as we both fell silent, and just fell into the moment.
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After I had left River to be tended to by the doctors, I made my way up to Luna’s quarters on the top floor, where we first met her. I had no idea what she wanted, but it had to be something to do with our next mission or something along those lines.
As I stood in front of the large door that lead to the old observatory, the guards that were usually there had gone, I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. Much to my surprise I opened quite easily, which could only mean one thing, she was expecting me.
As I slowly entered the room, I saw that the main room was empty, but the door to the side was open. On the desk there was an open journal and a pen which had just recently been put down. As I crept along the room, I made my way into the other offshoot, which was mostly likely Luna’s bedroom.
As I walked in, I saw her massive bed, which was currently unoccupied by anypony, but my gaze slowly shifted to the other side of the room, where I saw Luna standing on a balcony, her eyes closed and she horn glowing brightly. “Luna…” I asked walking partially into the room, but then I stopped to see that she was actually raising the moon, the one thing that still remained of her old duties.
As amazing as it was to watch, I knew it would not be best to interrupt her, so I slowly began to walk back to the door, but her voice stopped me. “It’s alright Frost, I know it’s you. You weren't disturbing me, if that’s what you were worried about” she said as she turned to smile at me, I stopped in my tracks and chuckled nervously. “I’m sorry, I didn't know you were in the middle of something important, it’s just that…Aurora said you wanted to see me” I said with a nervous smile, but her comforting gaze and chuckle was gentle and graceful.
“Indeed, please…come and see” she said as she turned around, I gulped nervously but walked out into the balcony and looked up. My eyes widened in wonder as I stared into the freshly risen starry night sky, which twinkled bright than usual. I sighed in wonder as I stepped next to her, she simply looked at me with a charming smile. “It’s beautiful…” I said as I stared in wonder and amazement, she chuckled lightly, “thank you, I used to think nopony enjoyed my night, but I learned from my mistakes as we all must do. But since my sister’s passing, I have been tasked of controlling both the sun and the moon, just like she did during my banishment” she said looking away with a sad look. I frowned slightly and placed a hoof on her shoulder in comfort.
“Is it hard to do..?” I asked her, she took a deep breath and looked up, a strong expression on her face. “It was at first, but over the years, I have gotten used to it, but it still brings back memories” she said in a somber tone, I looked away for a second. “I’m sorry…I didn't mean to make you think of bad memories” I said as I shrunk back a little. She chuckled and looked back at me, with a confident smile, “thee is no need to apologize, I have shed my tears for my sister and others, but it does not bring them back. That is why I formed the Night Ranger’s. so that we can fight to bring back that once peaceful land. I owe that to her, she died to protect that dream, but the king has corrupted that vision and continues to ruin my beloved kingdom” she said as she turned to me.
As fun as it was to talk with her about the night and the old days, there was still the matter that she called me here for. “With respect Luna, why did you call me here?” I asked her in a sincere tone, she smiled at me and placed a hoof on my shoulder, “I wanted to thank you…those ponies owe you and your friends their lives, thanks to you we managed to get them back safely” she said with a warming tone, but I sighed and looked down.
“Is something troubling you Frost?” she asked me, lifting my face up to hers. I sighed and looked up at her. “I’m not so sure it went so well. Because of me, River was nearly killed, and it would have been my fault” I said as I looked down. She smiled again and spoke up, “if I recall correctly, River risked her life to save you, and I’m sure your friends Dust and Vapor would have done the same. You may not realize it, but your friends will stand by you through any battle, and just you would for them, they would risk their lives for you” she said as she stepped next to me.
A few moments of silence passed before she spoke again. “I knew a mare once who would constantly worry for the safety of her friends, putting them before herself, and would risk her life for them. Twilight Sparkle was much like you, always caring for her friends and going to great lengths to save them and keep them from harm, and they returned it in kind. What I’m trying to say…is that your friends will always be by your side and they will always be there for you, through thick and thin” she said as I looked up at her with tears forming. She smiled calmly at me, and looked up at the sky above us.
She slowly unfurled one of her wings and wrapped it around me. “You showed great courage that day, and your commitment to your friends is undeniable, in my opinion, you may be one step closer to finding the truth behind your medallion. And I’m, sure your friends will be there on your path” she said as she smiled and walked into the room.
I stood there for a moment longer, my hoof grabbing hold of the medallion and twirling it around, I breathed deeply and looked up into the sky one last time. I thought of what I had been through recently, and what would come next. And Luna’s was right, my friends would be there for me, and I would be there for them.
With a broad smile on my face, I slipped the medallion in my coat and walked inside.
As the night twinkled with hope. Hope for a better day.
To Be Continued…