I was taking a stroll in the park a few days ago. Silver Spoon was sick that day, so I decided to pay Apple Bloom a visit. I wasn’t planning on hanging out with her, I just wanted to mess with her and her friends as they crusaded for their cutie marks. After all, they’re always doing something dangerous and stupid, it’s great to watch if you’re looking for a quick laugh.
Eventually I spotted Apple Bloom, sitting on the park bench all by herself. Huh, I guess her friends finally dumped her, I thought with a smile. I wondered when they would finally abandon that third wheel. Tricycles after all are for babies, everypony knows real mares ride bicycles! That’s why I only hang out with one friend at a time! Granted, I only have one friend, but you get the point. Anyways, I was about to call out to her, when-
“Diamond Tiara?” Apple Bloom called out before I could. She quickly got up from the bench and trotted towards me as fast as she could. “Thank goodness, Diamond Tiara! Ah thought I would be so lonely today,” Apple Bloom cried as she nuzzled into my shoulder, like the little pervert she was.
“Uh...say what?”
Shut up you! I’m trying to tell a story here! Now, where was I? Oh yes. Feeling pity for the sobbing Apple Bloom, I massaged her shoulder, and like any good samaritan would do, asked her what’s wrong.
“Mah friends finally realized how much of a loser ah am! And they abandoned me to hang out with Twist!”
“Yeah no. Sweetie was busy ‘helping’ out her sister, and Scootaloo decided to go camping with Rainbow Dash. And ah did not call out for ya! Ya called out ta me-”
One more word out of you and I’ll hit you.
“...”
Now, after comforting Apple Bloom to the best of my abilities, I decided to hang out with her for the rest of the day. This would prove to be my undoing. Do you remember what you wanted to do, Apple Bloom?
“Uh...explore the Everfree Forest?”
Yes, you heard right, my friends! Apple Bloom, in all of her infinite wisdom, thought the funnest thing to do was explore the Everfree Forest!
“It wasn’t that bad of an idea, was it?”
Look at our situation. Now answer your own question.
“...”
Now, being the brilliant mare that I was, I suggested that we would at least prepare for our adventure together. What if we were attacked by wild animals? Or if we got lost? We needed to make sure we were properly prepared. So we went and bought our supplies at the local market and made our way to the Everfree Forest.
“Golly gee, Diamond Tiara! This place sure is scary!” Apple Bloom said as she cuddled against my body. I could have sworn she was smelling my mane. It was both creepy and exciting at the same time-
“Why was it exciting?”
YOU HEARD NOTHING! A-anyways, as I was saying, after calming Apple Bloom down we entered the forest. It was dark, dank, and scary. Everything Miss Cheerilee said it would be. Apple Bloom shivered beside me, but for some odd reason I felt no fear. I was ready for whatever came at me!
“Didn’t ya run into a dung beetle and skedaddled?”
...No. No I did not.
“Yeah, ya did! That’s how we got lost in the first place!” Apple Bloom said, not realizing she was five seconds away from getting a pimp slap across the face! “...Ah’ll shut up now.”
I thought so. As I was saying, all of a sudden we were attacked by a manticore! Apple Bloom ran off like a coward and left me to die. Thankfully, I had a whip in my saddlebag and was able to use it to fight off the vicious beast. After the beast fell, I quickly ran after Apple Bloom, worried that klutz might get herself killed. Eventually I found her by a cave, crying her eyes out, begging for her dead parents to save her-
“Alright, now yer just trying ta make me mad!”
I have no idea what you are talking about. Now, will you let me tell the story or wh-
“Uh..excuse me?” somepony called out to us. We both turned and found two ponies, a mare and a stallion, staring at us strangely.
“I-is that filly narrating to herself?” the mare asked her friend. She had a wonderful set of blue eyes, with a mane that obviously took hours to stylize. I must admit, I am quite bedazzled by her looks.
“Yes...yes she is,” her friend replied with a nod. He turned to look at Apple Bloom with a questioning glance. “Excuse me, little filly, but are you and your… ‘special’ friend lost?”
“Yes! Yes we are!” Apple Bloom replied giddily. “Ah don’t suppose ya’ll could give us a lift ta Ponyville?”
“Why, of course we can! Hop on in!” the stallion said with a smile.
I have a bad feeling about this, I thought to myself.
“Uh… what did you think to yourself, little filly?”
Nothing.
“Aw, come on, Diamond! Ah’m tired, let’s just go with ‘em already!”
Hmm… I don’t know. We have no idea who they are. Is it really safe for us to go with two complete strangers?
>Chance it, go with the strangers
>Take Apple Bloom’s hoof and make a run for it, they could be cannibals!