Not\e/worthy

by YarnWeaver

Interlude: ABC

Sunday, P.E.08 - 9:34 A.M.
Santa Fe, TX - Someone Different

I don't remember when I fell asleep.

The pony show didn't really hold my attention. I lost count of how many episodes went by before my brain bit the dust. Sadly for me, falling asleep on the Family Room couch happens more often than I'd like.

Frankly, I've got a few issues with this show. For the time that I was awake, I felt like I was being subjected to something borderline offensive. Power only comes from one of two places: if it doesn't come from God, it comes from Satan. This show supporting the lie that power can come from within a person without regard to either of its true sources flies in the face of one of the founding principles of what I as a Believer adhere to.

And yet I heard Bartholomew laughing at some of the jokes he's doubtlessly heard before.

And yet I saw James struggling to hold in his outbursts over how cute he thinks the characters are.

And yet I felt my wife pull me closer and gasping during parts that she felt were more dramatic.

And yet I was reminded of some of the cartoons I saw when I was a child, with their morals employed to teach invaluable life lessons to those who needed to hear them.

After seeing the pilot for this show, I was ready to call it quits and just go to bed right then and there. It was clear as day to me that the show was going to continue to rely on those whatever gems of theirs to solve all of their problems. Magic seems to solve everything, after all. However, I was coaxed back into my seat, and, to my surprise, it seemed as though every last trace of the "magical powers" they went through two episodes searching for wasn't important anymore. The adventure was over, and they went back to their everyday lives.

The fact that the unicorns all have magic in and of themselves still bothers me, though; as does the fact that there isn't a single respectable male character in the show that isn't rendered ineffective or ridiculed.

However...

That they would choose to show one person doing all the work associated with running a farm struck a chord with me.

I know how that feels.

Though I may outsource several of the jobs that require specific skills that neither I nor my sons posses, nearly all of the maintenance work for Superior Mobile Home Park is done by me. Whether it be reflooring, repainting, or even just cleaning; whenever someone moves out, it's my job to make sure that the unit is ready for the next potential tenants as quickly as possible.

And I don't do hack jobs.

So I found it refreshing that the farmer pony, I think her name was Apple Jacks, learned a lesson that I have all too much experience with myself: the pitfalls of overextending yourself and the merits of asking for help when you need it.

And that was only four episodes in, if I recall correctly.
'
It was uncanny.

Despite all my misgivings, preconceptions and objections to the very idea that this show even exists, I somehow found myself...

...entertained.

The next couple episodes I vaguely remember each being about someone of the main cast being pitted against a new antagonist, but by then I was starting to doze off where I sat.

I awoke to later on to my wife shaking me and shouting my name.

"Damon! Damon, wake up!"

Something was wrong.

I felt like a rag doll in her hands.

I snorted awake to find the three of them gathered around me, seemingly aghast.

"I'm up. I'm-"

That...was most certainly not my voice.

Barty gets on his knees in front of the couch and looks me right in the eyes.

"Dad, I'm sorry to say this, but you've been ponified."

I sat there in uncomprehending disbelief for a few seconds before I remembered that this had just happened to Danny as well less than a day ago. I look down at myself...

...and am immediately reminded of individually wrapped slices of American Cheese.

"What?"