"You simply cannot trust wheels..."
Leiurus, disguised as a filly with a white coat and a short, straight black mane and tail, stood beside Trixie, and stared at the broken wheel on Trixie's cart. The wheel had broken apart. For Trixie's cart, this was a common occurrence. It happened once a trip, so she always kept a spare wheel, just in case. Sadly, she had left Ponyville in such a hurry that she had forgotten to pick up a new spare. Thankfully, the break wasn't too terrible, and could be repaired, once the wheel was removed. However, to add insult to injury, the wheel had broken on a muddy patch of road, where it would be practically impossible for Trixie's jack to be expected to safely hold up the cart.
Looking at the changeling, Trixie asked, "I don't suppose you know any spells that might help?"
Leiurus considered the issue briefly. "Three possible options. Option One, I use magic to hold up the cart while you work. Not a valid option: insufficient love reserves to maintain the elevation of the cart for the time period necessary. Option Two, use a spell to dry the mud sufficiently that the jack might safely be used. Not a valid option: the only spells I currently know would ignite the cart in the process of drying the mud. Option Three, a distress flare spell. Valid. While this road is not heavily traveled, there are population centers within visual range, but the probability of the flare being seen will be low until evening."
Trixie considered that: admittedly, that would leave them stranded here temporarily, but Trixie had three full canteens of water, as well as a sizable stock of food, so there was no problem regarding supplies. Since she was not on any sort of time-table, the delay would not cause her any real problems. In the meantime, she supposed she could get to know her little passenger better...
"Alright," Trixie said, nodding, "We'll wait until sunset, and then we'll see if we can get some help. In the meantime, make yourself comfortable, and we'll chat. Who knows, maybe we'll get lucky, and somepony will come by and give us a hoof."
"Affirmative," the disguised changeling said, then turned so that she could watch the road, and promptly sat down.
Leiurus was incredibly strange, Trixie reflected silently. She never complained, never complimented, never commented, and in fact, she never spoke unless spoken to first. The mare was uncertain if that was a result of her upbringing, or lack thereof, or simply because she was quiet by nature. The fact that Trixie had told the changeling that she could speak whenever she felt like it strongly implied the latter...
Trixie decided that the best question to ask was the one that had haunted her last night. "Leiurus, would you mind telling me why your father thought that the changelings needed some sort of living weapon?"
The changeling was silent for a few seconds, and when Trixie looked at the little filly, she saw that Leiurus had her face scrunched up, as if in ferocious concentration. After a moment, she said, "I do not mind. The information I have is limited: I was never directly informed of the reasoning behind the decision. Will that still be sufficient?"
"That's fine," Trixie said, with a nod.
The changeling nodded, then said, "The changelings have spent several centuries in the kingdoms across the great southern desert. The kingdoms there are sparse, and were constantly at odds, so they were not prone to uniting against a common threat. There was a great deal of wilderness there: plenty of room to hide even a large hive of changelings. However, as time passed, each kingdom began to improve their security, first on a purely physical level, then in terms of their infrastructure. This was not viewed as a major problem at first, but over time, we began having to expend greater amounts of love to take one of the kingdoms, yet the returns were, in a way, getting smaller: not in terms of volume, but in terms of the shares available for each changeling afterwards. Our numbers were growing, but the amount of love we were getting was not. Worse, our predations caused the various kingdoms to unite, and their hunger for new territory quickly reduced the amount of unexplored wilderness we could use as a refuge."
Trixie nodded, able to follow that much, at least. The main reason why the changelings had nearly taken Canterlot was due to the fact that nopony had heard anything of them before. Now that their existence was common knowledge, they'd have a much harder time pulling something like that again...
"There were two possible solutions to the problem: the first, and most popular, was to simply migrate to a location that lacked knowledge of our existence, and whose defenses were less substantial. The second, and held to only by a very small cabal of powerful figures within the aristocracy, was that a new weapon was needed, one that could devastate an entire city in a very short amount of time, exercising a very small amount of love energy. As I possessed an abnormally high innate magical potential, I was selected at birth to be the prototype for the project. The queen, however, felt the entire idea was disgusting, and overrode the cabal, instead demanding that we immediately migrate to this region. Braconidae was determined, however, and maintained the project in secret."
"And how," Trixie asked, a smile on her face at the absurdity of it, "Could you devastate a city? All on your own, I mean?"
Leiurus said, in the same flat monotone she always used, "All fortifications and structures have a weakness. Bricks and cement, wood and nails, even the buildings in the Crystal Empire are not immune to this: a properly tuned high frequency vibration spell would cause every building in the city to shatter. Iron rusts away in seconds under the Oxidation spell, and cement crumbles under the Enhanced Erosion spell. If the city must remain intact, but the populace neutralized, the Aggravating Itch spell, sufficiently enhanced, will force all armored defenders to shed their protection in an attempt to find relief, and the civilians can be effectively neutralized by a sufficiently enhanced Relentless Tickling spell afterwards. Anything that proves to be resistant to either, or both at once, can simply be blasted into submission. From there, the city is yours to do with as you wish."
Trixie's eyes widened in shock. The changeling made it sound almost nightmarishly simple. After a moment, she said, "Leiurus, I want you to listen very carefully to me. Could you do that for me, please?"
The changeling turned her head towards Trixie and said, "Affirmative."
Trixie cleared her throat, and said, "Unless I tell you otherwise, you are not to tell anypony, or any creature in the entire world, that you know how to do that. Do you understand me?" If it ever got out that it was that simple for a magic user to devastate a city, Trixie shuddered to think of the panic that would ensue. Not even Sombra had exercised that kind of ruthless practicality...
The changeling nodded, and said, "Affirmative." After a moment, the changeling tilted her head to one side, and said, "Something is approaching. I hear... singing..."
Trixie's ears perked up, and she listened carefully. She could hear it as well...
"Sumer is icumen in, lhude sing, cuccu; Groweth sed and bloweth med, and springth the wode nu; Sing, cuccu!"
The Cuccou song? Odd. Sumer Is Icumen In, or Summer Has Arrived, was a very old song. Trixie hadn't heard it in ages: her grandmother used to sing it. It was one of the oldest songs in Equestria, dating back to even before the founding of the country. It even predated Modern Equestrian, dating back to before ponykind had agreed on a single language. It could easily be one of the oldest songs in the world.
A moment later, the singer came into view... and what a sight he was. Dressed hoof to head in red and black jester's motley, complete with a cap with little bells that jingled merrily as he walked, it was clear that, like Trixie, whoever he was, he was some sort of a performer. However, the mask he wore, a gleaming white piece of metal worked into a unicorn's cheerful smile, covered his face completely, and made it impossible to tell anything other than that about him... save for the fact that he liked to sing, apparently.
"Awe bleteth after lomb, lhouth after calue cu; Bulluc sterteth, Bucke uerteth..."
Behind him he pulled a sled, covered with stacks of luggage. Trixie would have wagered that the weight of the load would have made it impossible to pull, save that the sled in question hovered at least three hooves off the ground. It would be nice to have a setup like that: no more having to deal with wheels that would always break at the worst possible moment...
"Murie sing, cuccu! Cuccu, cuccu, wel singes thu, cuccu; Ne swic thu naver nu."
Perched atop the massive pile was a small monkey of some sort. Upon spying the pair, it began to dance wildly, while hooting excitedly. The monkey, as would be expected, wore a little jester's cap himself. The pony jester seemed to notice the pair, and their damaged cart, and began to slow as he approached.
"Sing, cuccu, nu; sing, cuccu; Sing, cuccu; sing, cuccu, nu!"
Reaching the end of his song, the unicorn's horn flashed, and the sled gently lowered to the ground with a thud. The monkey leapt off of the piled luggage, and landed nimbly upon the stallion's back. The jester's voice, a strong bass-baritone, came from the mask, asking, "Need some help, ladies?"
Trixie bit back any sort of sarcastic response. First off, she was trying to be nicer, and it wouldn't do to snark at a good samaritan. Second, and perhaps more importantly, she was going to need to start being a good example to Leiurus, so she may as well start now. "We certainly could use some help. I'm afraid a wheel on my cart broke, and while I think I could fix it, my jack won't work on this muddy road." Noting the unicorn's sled with a raised eyebrow, she noted, "I doubt you have that kind of trouble very often."
A pleasant chuckle emerged from the mask, and the jester said, "Not often, no. Well, I can certainly help the two of you out." The unicorn's horn flashed briefly, then with one hoof, he raised the cart up to where the wheel could easily be removed and replaced... then promptly let it go...
Trixie had expected the cart to fall back down with a crash, but instead, it simply hung there, as though weightless. While Trixie wasn't a very strong spell caster, she had a pretty good knowledge of spells in general, and she could recognize a gravity-manipulation spell when she saw one. Impressive.
Smiling in gratitude, Trixie said, "Thank you. I'll need just a few minutes." She promptly went to work, removing the wheel so that it could be fixed.
---------------------
Leiurus studied the newcomer intently. This... individual was strangely garbed, and while he certainly seemed friendly enough, she had no idea how to classify him. He was a couple of inches taller than Trixie, maybe a bit heavier, but asides from that, she had nothing she could use to help place him in the hierarchy of the world.
And the fact that there was a monkey dancing atop his head was distracting...
After a moment, the changeling asked, "Why is there a monkey atop your head?"
The newcomer asked, "What monkey?"
Leiurus, her expression neutral, said, "The one atop your head."
The stallion promptly looked up, but not before the monkey had already leapt off of the pony's head and onto his back. "Huh," he said, "Nothing there. Strange."
"It is on your back now," the changeling said, as Trixie, still working on the wheel, laughed to herself, just loud enough to be heard.
The stallion turned to look behind him, but the monkey had slipped around, and now clung to the pony's belly. "Still nothing," the newcomer said, "Weird. I could almost swear I felt something there a moment ago."
Trixie giggled a bit more loudly than before.
"It is now clinging to your stomach," Leiurus said, now getting a little bit confused. What in the world was going on here? Couldn't he feel it moving about?
The stallion looked down towards his belly, but the monkey was now climbing up the stallion's tail. "Huh," the stallion said, "I don't see it." The stallion turned back towards Leiurus just in time for the monkey to climb back atop the stallion's head. "Are you sure," the stallion asked, genuine concern in his voice, "That you're not seeing things?"
Leiurus was about to say something, but just then, Trixie burst out laughing. Clapping her hooves together, the mare said, "Very well done. I've seen that routine before, but it's always fun to see. Tell me, how long did it take to train your monkey to do all of that?"
A routine? That was a performance? And he had intentionally trained his monkey to do that? How curious...
-------------------------
Chuckling, the stallion reached atop his head, and pulled off the monkey, holding the creature in his hooves and setting it on the ground. "Training him to do it was the easy part. Training him to do it quietly was a bit tricky. Biscuits here is a bit of a chatterbox."
The monkey started dancing about excitedly, clapping it's hands together.
Looking down at the miniscule primate, the stallion laughed, and said, "I haven't forgotten, Biscuits." The stallion's horn flashed, and a banana emerged from a bag in the pile, and sailed over to the monkey. The creature immediately set to eating it enthusiastically.
Trixie put the repaired wheel back in place, then set the cart back down into it's proper place, then turned, an eyebrow raised, and asked, "Why in the wide, weird world of Equestria would you name a monkey Biscuits?"
The stallion seemed confused for a moment, then abruptly thumped himself on the forehead. He asked, theatrically, "Where are my manners? I forgot to introduce myself. You can call me Gravy." The stallion extended a hoof. "I hope you get the joke."
Trixie took it and shook it, laughing. "Trixie Lulamoon. And this," she paused briefly and gestured to Leiurus, remembered just in time the assumed name they'd agreed on, and continued, "Is Elle. Pleased to make your acquaintance."
Gravy gave an extravagant bow, and said, "Think nothing of it. I am always happy to help a pony in need. Tell me, though, what brings the two of you out here?"
As the stallion removed the gravity spell on the cart, Trixie explained, "We were heading north, towards the Crystal Empire. I was hoping to put on a few performances there, and earn enough bits to see me through the winter."
The stallion tsk-tsked, and asked, "Then I guess you haven't heard?"
"Heard what?" the mare asked, an eyebrow raising. "Is there a problem?"
Gravy sighed theatrically, and said, "The Crystal Empire is currently closed to all comers, save for those with a royal permit to travel there. It seems that just after the city's return, two con-artists, Flim and Flam, sneaked in, and tried to scam the residents out of their hard-earned bits, selling items that were not available a thousand years ago... at absurdly inflated prices. After they were caught, and required to return the lion's share of their profits, the princesses decided to restrict travel to the city until such time as the populace could be a little better educated in the ways of the modern world."
Trixie sighed sadly. She should have known something like this would happen. It was just her luck...
"However!" Gravy's sudden exclamation caught Trixie's attention. "I have a permit to enter the city, and happen to be on my way over there now." The stallion pulled out a scroll from one of his bags. He unfurled it, and let Trixie have a look. It definitely appeared to be the genuine article: it had the royal seal upon it, and it had the easily recognizable signature of Princess Celestia as well. "The permit doesn't restrict how many ponies may come in with me, so I think I could sweet talk the guards into letting you enter as well."
Trixie smiled in gratitude, but then reality came crashing in. Nothing in life is ever this easy. "Not to sound rude," she began, not wanting to scare this good fortune away if it really was what it seemed, "But what's in it for you?"
"Ah, an excellent question," Gravy said, his voice merry. "Asides from the joy of being escorted by two delightful ladies such as yourselves, I do confess to having an ulterior motive. You see, I've been invited over for a long term engagement at the Crystal Empire, one that will keep me there over the winter, possibly longer. I can explain the details more fully once we reach our destination, but I could use an assistant or two: the entire affair is a bit complex, and many hooves would help make the work lighter. I will be happy to pay for your assistance, naturally. Say, a fifty-fifty cut?"
Blushing slightly from the compliment, Trixie raised an eyebrow at the offer: a fifty-fifty cut would be nothing to sneeze at, especially for a long term contract. While she expected that there was a lot that Gravy wasn't saying, it didn't seem like he was being intentionally deceitful. She could certainly use the money...
"Tell you what," Trixie said, nodding, "I can't make a promise until I hear all the details, but if, after you've gotten us into the city, and you've told me everything, I decide that I don't want to be a part of it, will I be free to say no?"
With a cheerful gesture, Gravy said, "Of course! I wouldn't think of forcing you to do anything you didn't want to do. If, after you've heard the whole story, you decide you don't want to take part, you're free to go your own way, with nary a complaint from me." The stallion extended a hoof, and asked, "Deal?"
Trixie took it, and shook it once again. "Deal."