Pony Floor, or "How We Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Dosh"

by The card holder


Waves 2-3

Once Twilight had stopped hitting her head on the wall, she decided to go ahead and observe the six things (which one of the ponies in the crowd called humans, which is probably better than just calling them things all the time) with the rest of the Elements, in case they were needed.

It wasn't hard to find the humans, as they could just follow the sound of the gunshots. Once again, the six were grouped together, fighting off the monsters in quite a bloody way. However, alongside the gray and red things, there were now a few other creatures attacking them; small black things that crawled on all fours and had all kinds of useless limbs protruding from its back, large, slow, fat ones that tried to vomit what looked like acid on them, only to blow up in said acid, and things that looked horribly burnt and launched fireballs from a device on its arm at the humans.

As the ponies watched, they could hear something speaking close to them.

"Come on, give us a kiss..."

Twilight whirled around, looking for the source of the voice, and just barely saw the outline of something approaching the humans. The one holding the now-bloody axe walked forward and swung at seemingly nothing, resulting in the sudden appearance of another kind of creature, its head falling a bit farther away. Time slowed down again, yet the human kept swinging, each time connecting with an invisible monster, and each time the slow motion "reset". After four of the things fell, time finally returned to normal.

"I've never kissed a dead tart," the human quipped, now focusing on whatever was closest to him.

Meanwhile, a fireball landed in the middle of the group, setting all of them on fire. They split, and started leading the monsters in four different directions. Only two of the humans were on their own, the others sticking with one other. Of the two loners, one of them, the suit-wearing masculine one, looked to have more creatures focused on him than the others. He fired off what looked like red, miniature fireballs at them from a pair of handheld devices, but soon he seemed to run out of shots. He kept getting hit trying to back up, and soon the ponies could see that he was limping slightly.

"Do something, or I'm ground bread!" he shouted at his teammates, who were off fighting by themselves. Alas, something was not done, and one last fireball was enough to make him keel over, dead. The swarming monstrosities began feeding on his body, though this was quickly stopped by one of the others lobbing an explosive in the middle of them. The ponies were expecting the late savior to show some remorse for their fallen comrade, but instead...

"Need to borrow my specs, mate?"

The would-be hero just walked on, not caring of his fellow warrior's death. The ponies were aghast at this, Twilight in particular.

From another direction, one of the other humans said, "Time to stock up lads."

Soon, the remaining five were back together again. One of them was limping, and in response another jammed the red device from earlier into them.

"Stand still, do I look like I'm nicking stuff?" Soon, they started to move as one in a new direction, towards...

Twilight gasped. "They're going to the library!"

"Why would they do that?" Pinkie asked.

"I don't know, but-" The realization hit her like a brick. "The door!"

She began running to the library, her friends shrugging and following her.

At the tree in question, they found the five humans finishing off the last few creatures. The metal door opened, and they poured inside. The ponies followed, and Twilight immediately started to get her letter writing supplies. Once she found a quill, a parchment, and wrote out a quick letter to Celestia, she remembered a vital part of this process.

"Where's Spike?" she asked, completely forgetting about the young dragon amidst the chaos.

"I think he's back with the rest of the ponies," Rainbow said.

"Alright, now before we leave-" Twilight noticed too late that the humans were walking back outside, and found herself instantly out there, as well, alongside her friends. She let out a groan of frustration. "Not again!"

The others were incredibly disoriented. "Wha- But- Just what in the hay is going on?!" Applejack shouted, kicking the tree in anger and exasperation.

Twilight noticed she still had the letter with her. "Nevermind that! Let's just get this letter sent to the Princess!" She ran off, once again leaving her friends to catch up.

Back in the center of town, Spike was easily found. The situation was briefly explained to him, and the letter was sent.

Twilight let out a sigh of relief. Now they just had to wait.

And since they had to wait, Twilight decided to just watch the humans some more, to make sure nothing bad happened. Amazingly, the one that died earlier was back, and was fighting as if he was never hurt at all. The same kinds of creatures kept attacking them, so they performed the same plan, though this time they didn't split up. Occasionally, slow motion would kick in after one of them killed one of the monsters, but the ponies had more or less learned to ignore that by now.

Soon, once again, the creatures were all killed, and the humans started heading to another metal door, this time at Sugarcube Corner. Twilight took this chance to try and communicate with the humans when they weren't in the middle of fighting.

Walking up to one of the blue ones, she positioned herself in front of them and cleared her throat. "Uh, hello?"

The human just stood there, staring blankly into nothing. The knife in his hand was replaced by a large, partially wooden device, which he seemed to inspect for a second. "Boomstick time!"

Twilight tried again. "Hello?"

This time, she got a response in the form of the human looking at her, which was somewhat unnerving as he also pointed the thing at her. Then, a single glowing brick flew from him.

"It's raining money!"

Twilight flinched when it flew at her, then passed right through her. She looked at the thing, and saw that it was a glowing bunch of paper with some numbers and a picture of another human on it. Her study was interrupted by the same human then walking though her and over the money, making it vanish. He then went outside, where another two humans were swinging their knives at each other. Strangely, though they both had blood on the blades upon making contact, neither of them looked to be sustaining any injuries.

For the third time, Twilight was booted out of the building, and she sighed. This would be a long night.