Walking down the street, I was mumbling to myself about my coltfriend. He was being unusually jerkish about our anniversary. Normally he would apologize for forgetting, and bring me flowers he picked from the rosebush we had out front. This time shouldn't be any different. So why was it?
He had stalked off in a fit of rage. I had no idea where. When I confronted him about our 3-year-anniversay, he just got really pissed and broke my favorite lamp, and stomped out the door. Completely, 100% out of his mind.
I looked up at the sky, and stopped trotting to the local bar. The night sky made me pause and stare at the wonderful stars, the big, beautiful moon. Princess Luna was the best at what she did. She had definitely earned her right to be a princess. The stars were a glittering blanket of comfort and beauty. A pang of homesickness passed through me; when I was a filly, my mother and I used to camp in our backyard, and watch the night sky for hours until our campfire was nothing but gently glowing embers and we talked to each other about the latest gossip with my friends or her work until we fell asleep, snuggled up under Luna's sky.
And now I had nothing. No family, no friends. Only my coltfriend, Noteworthy. I had wanted to spend our anniversary camping under the stars and Luna's moon and tell him about what me and my mother used to do. I didn't talk about her much. It still hurts, even after twelve years. It did't make sense for him to storm off like that. I wasn't even particularly mad about it- him forgetting our anniversary, that is.
Something about his anger was peculiar.
But, as I continued trotting, I realized that it probably didn't matter. I was about to be drunk, too drunk to remember this, too drunk to remember that I was even drunk. I would be free.
Looking about as I came up to the bar doors, which were open, I realized that something was very strange, indeed. Something like Pinkie-Pie the Party Pony's Pinkie Sense told me that I should be careful. Let's call it intuition.
I was still standing at the doors like a confused filly when a glass shattered against the frame of the door, sprinkling the ground around me. A smile practically splitting my face in two, I yelled, "Hey, Jade, what are ya throwin' glasses at me for?" The deep green mare just nodded and beckoned me over.
I jumped over there, and we wrestled for a moment by the bar. She got me in a headlock and started giving me a rough noogie. "Hey, hey, hey! Ouch, you should have a hoof for your cutie mark instead of that wine bottle!" I yelled. Nothing could really start much of a stir in this place- it was more for wrestling on the tables and smashing glasses- stuff like that. You wouldn't find any of Manehatten's or Canterlot's fancy-schmancy ponies in here. They were wimps.
Sitting on a rough bar stool, I glanced around, not really looking for anything. Jade took her place behind the counter and started rubbing the inside of a glass with a rag. I swear those things are just props- all bartenders have them. "Might wanna look in the corner over there, by the arcade games," Jade said, seemingly talking to no one in particular. I knew the statement was directed at me, though. I looked in the corner- and froze.
Letting out the loudest shriek this bar has ever heard and ever will hear, I pounded over to the broken arcade games and smashed my hooves in them, glass breaking and my hooves and legs getting scraped by it. "Noteworthy," I hissed, aware that everypony had stopped and was watching with intense silence, and my legs were beginning to bleed. Beyond caring.
"Baby, I-I can explain!" Noteworthy said with a pleading tone slipping into his voice. I looked into his eyes. What I saw there wasn't what he wanted me to think he was feeling. There wasn't guilt, sadness, or even embarrassment. Only boredom. Apparently, this was a game.
"'Baby?' No, nonononono! Don't tell me that SHE is your marefriend!" a baby-pink mare cried. In any other circumstance, I would've thought she was pretty and asked her how she did her mane. But this was not the pony, the time, or the place to be friendly.
"Oh, no. I'm not his marefriend- ANYMORE, that is. I advise my EX-coltfriend to go buck himself up the ass with a very large knife," I hissed, storming off after I made my point. Everyone in the bar was gawking at me like I was a freaking goddess or something. I doubted they would've even had the nerve to talk to Noteworthy (him being a fancy-schmancy pony, and all) the way I just did.
I shoved my way through the small crowd that had gathered around the arcade area, tears stinging the back of my eyes. They parted slightly, a few giving me nods of sympathy and pats on the shoulder. I didn't need or want their pity- but at the same time it was comforting. It was comforting to know that these ponies that I had probably never seen before, let alone talked to, cared that I was sad. Bar-ponies really are the nicest ponies- MOST of them, anyway, I corrected myself, realizing that Noteworthy was probably a bar-pony. Apparently there was a lot about him that I didn't know.
Arriving at the door, I heard someone pushing their way to me. "Bea, don't go," I heard Jade say. I took a step out of the door, tears about to fall. "I've got to, Jade. I've got to before- before-" I started hiccupping, and Jade's comforting arms were draped around my neck, calming me down. "Before he realizes that he's won..." I'm sure that my eyes were red and puffy already. I turned to look into her maple-syrup eyes, which were sad and old and wise beyond her years.
"Then, yes. Go. You can crash at my place if you need to; key's under the doormat," she said, kindness evident in her eyes, her grip becoming loose.
"Thank you, Jade," I said, tears welling up. I blinked them away, turned and took a few steps forward, her arms falling away. And I galloped as fast as I could. To the bar down the street. So I could do what I had planned to do; get insanely drunk.
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"And then I kicked his bucking ass," I warbled, downing my sixth shot and taking a gulp of my fourteenth beer. "Another shot," I demanded.
Pouring and passing me another shot, this bartender had raised his eyebrows. Was he surprised that I was kicking flank? I mean, I'm pretty, but I'm not a pansy. "Sounds like you've got an adventurous life," he commented, pulling out the prop (the glass with the rag) and started rubbing it.
"Well, nothing special," I said, inspecting my hoof as I wobbled on my stool. This was one of the classier bars. They didn't have many bar fights. Maybe once or twice a month. Damn, the one that I usually went to had bar fights once or twice a night.
"Hey, could you turn the music down?" I half yelled, half dribbled. For some reason my mouth wasn't working properly. Wasn't obeying my commands. I closed it with a snap. There was this awful music blaring in my ears. I downed my next shot and started hiccupping. "There's no music playing," the bartender stated. He must be insane. Or drunk. Only insane or drunk ponies would say that I was lying about music being played.
"Of course there is," I stated, very loudly, and very drunk-like. I got up and started to dance to the beat, even if it was awful. I have a feeling that I mostly just wobbled around.
A strange feeling came over me, and I tossed some bits that I was sure was more than enough to pay for my drinks, and stumbled out the door.
My body carried me, not very steadily, but it carried me. The moon guided me as I followed the beat of the music.
It carried me to a house. No, not 'a' house. The house. Vinyl Scratch's house. I was at THE house! How in the buck did I get here?
The beat.
It carried me to her door, then it stopped. I pounded on the white door. The paint was chipping. She needed someone to repaint. I pounded again, and a very disgruntled white mare with spikey blue hair opened the door. Without hesitating, she pulled me in the house.
Vinyl. Vinyl bucking Scratch.
Was I so drunk that I was hallucinating? I didn't think so. Maybe.
"Will you stop starin' at me like that?" Vinyl asked. "It's not like I'm an extrater- extraterres- alien thing or anything." I pulled in a sudden intake of air, and released my brain-vomit.
"OhMyGoshOhMyGoshOhMyGosh! You'reVinylScratch,TheBestDJInTheEntireFreakingMultiverse,ILoveYouSoMuch!!WillYouAutographMyHooves??OhMyGoshOhMyGoshOhMyGosh!!!" And I was suddenly shut up by a white hoof clamping down on my mouth.
"Shut the buck up!" Hissed Vinyl. "But You're Vinyl Scratch!" I tried to protest, but I have a feeling that the only thing that she heard was, "Mmf Mmmmf MmMm Mmft," because her hoof was still on my mouth. "Promise that you'll be quiet so I can explain to you what I need you to do?" I tried to say yes, but all that was coming out of my mouth was, "Mmmft," so I frantically nodded.
Slowly, she took her hoof off of my mouth and said, "Okay, here's what I need you to do. Listen to this record, and tell me what you think." She marched over to her DJ equipment while I stared in awe. She was going to spin a record so that I could listen to it? Just for me? I'm not crazy or anything, or a fillyfooler, but I was drunk, so I thought this was really sweet. Not creepy. If I was sober, I would have realized how insanely creepy it was that Vinyl Scratch just pulled a stranger into her home and was about to spin records for her.
She nodded at me, and I smiled goofily. She was my IDOL!
And she began to spin the most disgusting music I've ever heard.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold it!" I shouted over the music. She glared at me and took the needle off of the record. "Could you BE any louder?" She said sarcastically, her red eyes burning through her purple glasses. "I swear to Celestia, if you wake up my marefriend, I will buck you up. Twice."
"But the music was awful, and if you don't want to wake up your marefriend, then why are you playing it so loud?" I reasoned. "I was playing it insanely quiet, if you didn't notice," Vinyl spit the words at me. "Why are you so mad?" I wondered. "Because you are being loud, and criticizing my work," she said. "But why am I here, then, if not to help you make it better?" I said, realizing that it must be true.
"I don't know why you're here. You started banging on the door, and I pulled you inside before you could wake 'Tavi up. I see now that it might've been a mistake," She said very calmly. Sheesh, bipolar much?
"Look, I dunno why I'm here," I slurred. "But this music is awful, and I need to fix it. 'Kay?" I said as I stumbled to her DJ system and started screwing around with it. Somehow, I knew what I was doing, and with a few adjustments, I let the record spin.
It was perfect now.
And my flank started burning. I looked at it and realized with a shock, that I had just gotten my cutie mark. Finally. A deep red set of headphones were imprinted on my dark purple flank. Awesome.
"You-you-" Vinyl sputtered. "It's amazing..." She said, in awe. Well, she wasn't the only one. I had surprised my drunk self with my ability to do whatever it was that I just did. And I knew I could do it again. "Yeah, well, that's me. Amazing," I said.
All of a sudden, Vinyl said, "How would you like a job as the main sound tester for me?'