Chapter 4
Fluttershy’s head was swimming. She tried to remember what had happened, but the raging vortex of her mind refused a single thought to form. Sprawled out on the ground, she could not find the strength to move her legs. She attempted to open her eyes, but that, too, proved to be a fruitless effort. Until she could pick herself up, she decided to lie on the ground and rest.
She listened to the world around her as she cleared her head, but she could not hear a sound. That struck her as odd. Even in the dead of night there was always something making noise. It might be a cricket’s chirp, an owl’s hoot, or a wolf’s howl, but there should be at least a few stray noises. Instead she could hear nothing. She tried to think of a reason why the noises would vanish, but she kept drawing blanks. At the very least, the pure silence helped clear her mind.
Feeling her head calm down at last, she tried to open her eyes again, and though they may as well have been made of lead, she finally got them open. Her eyes were misty, probably from having woken up only a few moments ago. She blinked several times to clear away the mist, but after a few minutes, it was still there.
It was then that she realized that her eyes were not playing tricks on her. She lifted her head, and surprised herself with how easily she was able to move it. Her legs were not as cooperative, refusing to move an inch. Instead, she sat up by heaving her chest up and flapping her wings for balance. After some effort she was sitting upright in the mysterious mist. She swiveled her head left and right to figure out where she was.
She was sitting in a surreal, swirling white fog that reduced visibility to near zero. The fog was all around her; above, beneath, behind, everywhere. It was so thick she could almost choke on it, yet she could not feel it against her fur. There was also no visible source of light, everything was simply white. It was unnatural; nothing glowed or reflected any light at all. She stared straight into the slowly swirling mist for what felt like an hour, mesmerized by the bizarre nature of this place.
Then it dawned on her; she was completely alone. Neither Houndoom nor the spirit guide was with her. She franticly spun her head around searching for her companions.
She stopped turning and called out in her meek voice, “H-hello? Is somepony there?” Her voice echoed around her for miles, but nothing responded.
Her mind panicked as she tried to see through the fog, but her body did not respond. This only served to send her further into disarray. Why was her mind racing while her body was calm? She thought about running away, but she remembered her leg and shot the idea down. Her best bet was to wait here until something found her. She took a deep breath to calm herself and stared into the mist.
***
Time did not seem to pass in this place. Fluttershy felt like she had been sitting and waiting for days, but for all she knew it could only have been a few minutes. Sighing deeply, she tried for the hundredth time since she began waiting to call out for help.
“Hello?” Her voice carried far, but nothing happened. “Houndoom? Spirit guide? Are you there? Anypony? Please answer…”
After waiting for three entire minutes, she released a dry sob from her throat and cried into her hooves, though her body produced no tears.
“So you are awake at last.”
Startled by the sudden sound, Fluttershy whipped her head around so fast that her neck should have snapped. She found the grey spirit guide floating inches away from her, his arms crossed and his eye looking down at her curiously.
“And here I thought you were planning on starting your eternal sleep early.” The spirit chuckled softly at his clever remark as Fluttershy gathered a huge amount of air in her lungs.
“KYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!” Fluttershy’s sudden shriek made the spirit cringe.
Fluttershy sprang to her hooves faster than she ever had in her life and turned to flee from the horrid monster, but just as she did a thought streaked through the front of her mind like a bullet, freezing the blood in her veins and halting her in her tracks.
Fluttershy craned her neck to see her leg. She was both relieved and disturbed to see that, though her leg was still burned as before, it did not hurt in the slightest to move it. Staring at her limb, she kicked it a few times to test it out. Each kick brought absolutely no feeling to her body, as if it wasn’t even there. She turned back towards the spirit guide.
“You must be wondering why your terrible burn no longer pains you.” The spirit asked. Fluttershy nodded silently and the creature continued, “Your physical form is back at the clearing, the form you currently reside in is a spiritual manifestation of your physical being. Thus, you feel no pain, you cannot shed tears, and adrenaline or other bodily compounds will not affect you.”
Fluttershy continued looking over her spirit form as she asked, “Then why was it so difficult to move when I first woke up here, but now I can move without a problem?”
“Your soul was still adjusting to this realm. The process always takes some time to get used to. Rest assured, though, that your body should not come under any harm while your soul is here.”
Fluttershy cocked her head. “How can you be so sure of that?”
“Because I placed your body under a safeguard, it will remain undetected, even in that open clearing, until I remove it.”
Fluttershy sighed in relief before returning her gaze to the ghost. “Thank you for finding me, mister. I was afraid I would be lost in this place forever and…” Fluttershy looked left and right into the white nothingness, but still nothing emerged. “Pardon me for asking, mister…”
“You may call me Dusknoir.” The creature replied with a nod of his head and a small dignified bow.
Fluttershy made a soft “oooo” at the sound of the creature’s name. It was ominous, but not hauntingly so, and it was strangely fitting for his role as a guide for souls. She shook her head.
“Right, Dusknoir, where am I?” She asked innocently.
If Dusknoir had an eyebrow, he would certainly be arching it.
“You haven’t figured it out yet?” He asked as if he were tutoring a foal in basic algebra. He spread his long arms apart and gestured to the infinite void that surrounded them. “This is the spirit world.” Fluttershy looked less scared and more confused at Dusknoir’s remark.
“But how can this place be the spirit world?” Fluttershy asked, “All the stories say that the spirit world is supposed to be an eternal paradise or something like that.”
Dusknoir did not answer her; instead, he held his right hand in front of the yellow pegasus and created a small blue fire that burned softly in the misty dreamscape. Focusing his concentration on the ball of fire, he held his open palm high above his head. As he did, the fire expanded violently into a massive fireball that burned like a beacon throughout the spirit world. Fluttershy stared at the ominous fire in silent wonder when Dusknoir’s voice called her back.
“There he is.” He stated while pointing a finger out to a seemingly random direction.
Fluttershy turned to face the same way and saw Houndoom walk out of the mist and towards the fire. The black dog kept walking until he was right in front of Dusknoir and Fluttershy. Once the three were all together, Dusknoir reduced the size of the flame until it was just large enough to fit comfortably in his palm.
Fluttershy trotted over to Houndoom and tilted her head slightly. “Why are you here Houndoom?” She asked, “Do you want to see Berry too?” She did not think that that was the real reason and the demon dog confirmed this with a shake of his head. “Oh. Then, why did you come here? Was there-” Fluttershy was interrupted as Dusknoir cleared his (throat?) rather loudly, bringing the other two’s attention back to him.
“If there are more questions that you wish to ask, you can do so as we travel.” He turned away from her and held the flame by his side so Fluttershy could see it. “Please follow me.” was the last thing he said before moving into the mist and out of sight. Even when his body disappeared into the void, the mysterious fire was clearly visible, and Fluttershy and Houndoom made haste to catch up with it.
****
The three had been moving side by side through the void for a while now, and the pegasus was starting to wonder if they were making any progress at all. Dusknoir was not one to begin a conversation it seemed, so they walked, or rather, he floated and she walked, in silence. Fluttershy decided to begin her questions, since there was no telling how long they would be walking. She tried to ask Houndoom why he had come here with her, but she stopped her line of inquiry immediately when she saw his face.
Houndoom’s entire body was a conflicting clash of emotion, leaving Fluttershy at a loss for words to directly describe his mood. The way his shoulders sagged with weariness made it seem as if he had been on a long journey and was almost home. At the same time, his walking pace was also a bit faster that Dusknoir’s. The way his muscles were tensing, she could tell that he was fighting back the urge to abandon them and sprint off blindly into the void and chase down whatever he was after. Deciding not to interrupt Houndoom’s thoughts, she walked closer to Dusknoir instead.
She turned her head to face the spirit, who did not seem to acknowledge her presence. “So, Mister Dusknoir,” She began nervously, “I thought the afterlife was supposed to be one big paradise where everything you could ever wish for is right in front of you, not this big empty wasteland.” She waved a forehoof at the void to emphasize her statement.
“This is a place for spirits to find peace, not joy.” Dusknoir stated curtly.
Fluttershy tilted her head in confusion and asked, “But what about all the stories I heard as a foal about the endless green fields and the crystal clear water and the singing birds and the nice breeze and Angel bunny and the-” Fluttershy cut herself off once she realized that she had been rambling, and waited quietly for the spirit’s answer.
The spirit spoke out without turning his head, “I can tell you how those fantasies came to be.” Fluttershy perked her ears and listened intently as Dusknoir explained. “Once I bring souls here, I find them a place to rest, and they enter their eternal slumber. When they do so, they dream. They dream about whatever their mortal heart desired when they were alive. Whether that is a mountain of money or a beautiful view of the lake at night, or the constant presence of their friends, each soul sleeps forever in their own personal paradise.
“The stories of the spirit world being an eternal paradise were started long before your time. Thousands of years ago, when my mistress lent the zebras the power to summon me,” He was rudely cut off by Fluttershy asking another question.
“Your mistress? Who’s that?” Fluttershy chirped innocently.
Dusknoir felt a tear of nostalgia well up in his eye as he remembered his mistress, though he did not allow Fluttershy to see this.
“My mistress is the one who gave my existence reason.” He continued, “It is because of her that I am able to make sure each and every soul on this planet is given its chance at eternal slumber.”
“You seem very fond of her.” Fluttershy commented.
“Yes, I am.”
“What was she like?” Fluttershy’s ears opened up as she eagerly awaited his answer.
Dusknoir slowed his movement as he remembered the past. “She was… kind to me.” His tone was weighed down with nostalgia as he spoke. “My first memories begin abruptly, once upon a time I awoke to find myself as a spirit. Not with a spiritual form as you can see now, but simply a… conscience. I do not know what my life was before then-if I even had one. All that I knew… was that I was alone.
“I could think clearly, and though I lacked a physical body, my consciousness could move, so I traveled to the first settlement I could find. Eventually I found a small tribe of zebras in the southern plains. I knew what they were called as soon as I saw them, but I could not remember how I knew such a thing. Their language and way of life came instantly to me as well, and it tormented me. I longed to be with them, to talk with them, with something, anything. Unfortunately, as I was a simple mass of awareness, they could not see me, feel me, or hear me.
“I raged against the heavens above, cursing the gods for cursing me with this form. Why? I asked, why me? What had I done to deserve such torture? What was my purpose for being here? I begged and pleaded with the gods for an answer.” Dusknoir clenched his fist in rage, startling the mare walking beside him.
“I never received an answer. It seemed that, as the mortals below could not hear me, neither could the gods above. That is where I found my determination. If they would not grant me an answer, then I would find it myself. I left the zebra tribe that day and moved into the distance.
“I do not know how long I travelled. Time did not register with me as my mind was overrun with thoughts and questions. I traveled over mountains, under the oceans, through dense marshlands, watching the seasons change and the creatures die. I saw griffons soar on the high mountains, dragons sleeping in the darkest caves, and buffalo stampede across the endless plains.
“Their languages and cultures came to my mind effortlessly as well, and I could cycle through any language at a second’s notice. Though as I said earlier, it did me no good, and my ever expanding knowledge was useless in every way. I spent an eternity in thought, wandering the world, oblivious to everything around me, until someone broke my concentration.”
Fluttershy skipped lightly with anticipation as she asked, “Who was it?”
“In some forest, I heard the lamentations of a mare.” Dusknoir’s movements slowed even further as the memories came rushing back, until he stopped completely. “I followed the sound of her voice until I saw her sitting alone in a small clearing. Her fur was such a deep shade of blue that one would mistake it for the black of the night sky, and her mane drew me closer as it somehow twinkled with the light of a million stars.”
Fluttershy covered her mouth and gasped softly. He must be talking about the princess! She tried to speak up but the spirit was lost in his memories and his voice overpowered hers.
“I moved closer to her and was shocked to see both a majestic horn and a pair of angelic wings on her body. In all my travels across the world, I had never seen anything as beautiful as her. A diamond tiara rested behind her horn, giving me the impression that she was a royal of some sort. As I listened to her captivating voice, this thought was confirmed. She droned on about how her sister was the only one the citizens of the kingdom appreciated, that they only loved her sister’s sun, and not her moon. She would slam her hooves on the ground in despair, asking why she was always forgotten and left all alone.
“I instantly felt a connection between us. Neither of us had a purpose, existing all alone and being ignored by everything and everyone around us. Although I had long accepted that I could not speak with the living, I felt compelled to comfort her in any way I could. I reached out with my voice and reassured her that I appreciated the beauty of the night, and she thanked me, startling both of us.
“Against all odds, she could hear me, and sense my consciousness. I told her of my plea; how I longed to be with the living again, to talk with them and interact with them and share their emotions. I told her that I wanted a purpose but I was trapped in this ethereal form with no way of escape. Sensing that I was sincere, she offered me a deal.
“She told me that she would construct a body for my consciousness to reside in and grant me a purpose under one condition; that I would forever be her loyal friend and servant.”
“And did you accept?” Fluttershy asked softly, leaning in as she awaited an answer.
Although Dusknoir lacked a mouth, his face moved in such a way that the Pegasus could see that he was trying his best to smile.
“Of course I did.” He said proudly. “Using powerful magic with the likes of which I had never thought possible, she created a vessel for my soul out of the purest shadows. The moment my soul entered that empty husk, my life was changed forever…forever…for…ever.”
Dusknoir suddenly started convulsing and he clutched at his stomach as though it was fit to explode. He doubled over as the antennae on his head overloaded his mind with electric currents. He groaned in agony and his red eye faded from his socket, leaving his body an empty shell as his vision turned to black.
****
His eye suddenly snapped open, revealing the pure white of his spirit world. He looked down and saw the yellow pegasus standing in front of him, waving a hoof in his face and asking, “Are you all right?” Dusknoir was surprised that she was genuinely concerned about his wellbeing, despite him being a complete stranger. He assured her that he was fine, and shook his head to rid himself of the horrible after-image that plagued his thoughts.
“What happened mister Dusknoir?” Fluttershy asked softly. “You were about to say something about your mistress and then you just passed out.”
“I am perfectly fine, truly.” He replied shakily. “Suffice to say that though my lifetime with my mistress was wonderful, there are some things I would rather forget.” He reached his hand up to inspect his antennae for any damage and after assuring himself that nothing was wrong, brought his gaze back to Fluttershy.
“Um, if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay. I don’t want to do anything if you don’t want to.” She traced a circle in the ground with her hoof and looked away sheepishly as she said, “We can talk about something else instead, if that would make you feel better.”
“I appreciate that, thank you.”
Dusknoir turned to Houndoom, who was getting very antsy waiting for the guide to regain his composure.
“I apologize for my momentary lack of control.” He summoned forth the blue ball of fire once more, and repeated his earlier statement, “Please follow me. Our destination is not too far away.” He glided forward. Fluttershy trotted to his side and threw him a warm smile. He nodded and asked, “What were we discussing before?”
“You were saying that zebras used to summon you a long time ago.”
“Ah yes!” He replied, eager to return to the previous topic.
“The zebras would frequently ask to speak with their dead relatives, who would tell them of how wondrous a place their dreams in the afterlife were. As the years passed and I was summoned less frequently, the exact details started to slip through the cracks, and soon all anyone ever knew of the afterlife was some beautiful paradise.”
Fluttershy looked innocently at Dusknoir as she asked, “But I thought you were terribly busy with transporting souls here, how did you have the time to let all those zebras visit their relatives?”
Dusknoir at last tilted his head toward Fluttershy, giving her a minimal view of his face. If she stared hard enough, she could almost see the tiniest hint of a blush on the spirit’s face.
“That was a ruse.” Dusknoir said, sounding like a magician finally revealing the secret of his tricks.
Fluttershy slowed down her walking speed as she tried to comprehend that statement.
“What do you mean?” She asked, remembering how scary he had been as he yelled at her in the clearing. He sounded so serious when he said how busy his schedule was, why would he lie to her?
The phantom slowed its pace so as to not leave Fluttershy behind. Houndoom slowed his pace too, though he clearly showed signs of impatience with this delay, walking a few feet ahead, turning his head back and whimpering. Ignoring him, Dusknoir continued, “Time does not flow here the same way it does in the mortal realm. Here, I am omnipotent; I have as much time as I wish to make sure each and every soul finds its resting place.”
“You make sure every single soul of every single creature finds its own place to rest in this infinitely expansive world?” Fluttershy asked.
The ghost nodded.
“By yourself?” She added with disbelief.
“Yes. This is my eternal duty. To shepherd the souls to this realm, and ensure they are at peace.”
“But don’t you ever get lonely?”
As the words breached his consciousness, Dusknoir stopped moving for a second time. Staring off into space, the word reverberated inside his mind. Loneliness… How could he possibly forget this feeling?
“I am always alone. Even when I am surrounded by countless faces, I am alone.” He faced Fluttershy again and she saw that his face was twisted in sorrow. “When my mistress left me so many years ago, she left a void in my chest, a void that no amount of souls could fill. It pains me, even now, to continue on without her. But I made a promise to her, and no matter what happens to me, I will uphold that promise.”
Fluttershy sounded like a child begging their grandparents to tell them a story when she asked, “What did you promise her?”
“There is a small story behind this promise, so we must continue on while I tell you.” Dusknoir turned and beckoned for the other two to follow him. Fluttershy quickly returned to his side, but Houndoom was indifferent to the story.
“I told you before that I am the creature responsible for bringing souls to the afterlife, correct? Well, whose duty was it before me?”
Fluttershy shook her head and guessed, “Luna’s?”
Dusknoir showed his quasi grin again and said, “Correct. She told me that she was busy with so many duties; raising the stars and moon, attending night courts, filling paperwork, and on top of all that, she had to take the souls of her subjects to the afterlife.” He moved the hand containing the purple fire closer to Fluttershy, so her attention would be focused on it. When he had her attention, he threw the ball of fire into the air in front of them. The fire stayed the same distance from them, even as they trekked through the spirit world.
As the spirit spoke, the flame began curving upward like the rising sun, growing slowly brighter as it did until it peaked above them. “When the sun dawns on their lives, they are under the elder sister’s watch. But when the sun sets on their mortal lives,” The burning light faded as it began its descending arc. “The younger sister takes her place and keeps them safe.” The fire found its way back into Dusknoir’s broad palm and he stared at it solemnly.
“With so much work for one mare to do, she told me that she was overworked and stressed. She had grown quick to anger and agitation around her servants and subjects, and so they rejected her. She was always tired and depressed. I hated to see her suffer, so I offered to take the souls to the spirit world myself. That way, she might have more time to gain the admiration of her subjects, or at least rest more.
“She agreed to pass on the duty to me, but there were a few problems. For one thing, only she could open the gate to the spirit world. So we created a system, she told me to find some lost souls during the day, and guide them back to the spot in the forest where we first met. That first night, I only found one soul, a recently deceased unicorn stallion named…”
Dusknoir slowed his pace as he wracked his brain for an answer. He rubbed the side of his head as he ran through his memories. “I know there was a Star in his name somewhere. Was it Star… whirl? No, that’s not it.” Dusknoir forgot about the pegasus as he mumbled to himself.
Fluttershy thought recognized that name, so she looked through her memories as well. Who would know about old unicorns? Twilight probably would. Yes! Twilight told me about him once! She said his name was…
“Star Swirl the Bearded!” The two shouted at once. They stopped moving and looked at each other silently for a moment.
“You recognize his name?” Dusknoir asked. “It was such a long time ago; I thought his teachings had been lost.”
Fluttershy shook her head. “Oh I don’t really know anything about him, but my friend Twilight showed me this book of unicorn history once, she said he was really important.”
“Indeed he was,” the spirit confirmed, “you see, he was the first unicorn to-”
“WOOF! WOOF!” Houndoom’s shrill call pierced the air of the conversation like a javelin. When they turned to face him, he began growling menacingly, lowering his head and pulling his lips back into the most gruesome snarl Fluttershy had ever seen. His anger was clearly aimed at the spirit alone, but she could not help but be intimidated by the dog’s unexpected ferocity.
Dusknoir rolled his eye sarcastically and called out, “Oh you mortals are all the same,” He casually pushed the snarling dog aside, causing it to yelp in surprise, and began moving forward again. “Impatient!” He added with a loud huff. Houndoom glared at the ghost for another moment before bouncing back into the lead. Fluttershy trotted back beside him and reminded him of the more important story. The spirit apologized for getting off track and continued his tale.
“As you could guess, one spirit a night was not a sufficient speed for the shepherd of souls. Not to be discouraged, she told me to keep trying, granting me powers to locate souls and to gather them more efficiently. Progress was slow but steady and enjoyable.
“We would meet at midnight in the clearing every night. I would show her my collection of souls, she would tell me of her day, and we would talk as we brought the souls to rest. Over time, as I became more and more skilled at my task, the bond between us grew ever stronger.
“One night, however, something changed.” Dusknoir’s tone became dour as the less savory memories resurfaced.
“She arrived on time, but without her usual look of joy. I asked her what was wrong and she told me that she had gotten into another fight with her sister. She told me that none of her plans to become closer to her subjects had worked, and that they still shunned her.” Dusknoir’s shoulders sank as he recalled the terrible news.
“In fact, she lamented that the situation had gotten worse. She had even overheard some ponies talking of an evil demon they called Nightmare Moon that flies to the middle of the forest every night at midnight to feast on the souls of the dead!”
Fluttershy gasped and most likely would have fainted if her spirit form allowed it.
“I still do not know who or what started those horrible rumors,” Dusknoir clenched his fist in rage, “But after we laid that night’s souls to rest, she told me that it was the time for action. I told her that no matter what happens, I would always appreciate her night above all else. She thanked me, but told me that it was too little too late… A week passed before I saw her again.
The spirit’s eye narrowed and his movements slowed once more, to the annoyance of Houndoom, who whined with impatience. Dusknoir ignored him completely.
“When she finally returned she looked almost unrecognizable. Her fur was the color of perfect darkness, her eyes gleamed like a dragon’s, and her teeth had grown into vicious fangs. She was fitted with diamond plated armor and she was noticeably taller. I wanted to ask why she looked like she was prepared for war, but she did not allow me to speak as she gave me her last orders.
“She told me that she had spent the last week planning to overthrow her sister. She would eliminate the day, and force her subjects to bask in her glorious night for eternity. I thought that she had lost her mind, but she proved me wrong.
“She explained that she had written down a spell to summon my specific soul into a book and given it to a zebra tribe leader that was loyal to her. This way, even if she should die, her magic and knowledge would not be lost.
“She also told me that if she should fail in this attempt, that there would be no other way to enter the spirit realm and uncountable souls would be trapped in a state of unrest. Even in her current, twisted state of mind, she did not wish such torture on her subjects, and gave me her cloak. She told me that she had imbued it with her most ancient and powerful magic. Simply being near the cloth nearly overwhelmed my being.”
Dusknoir stopped moving altogether and said softly, “In fact, I still have it with me.” Fluttershy felt her blood freeze as a familiar *click* echoed into her ears. Dusknoir’s body cracked open like before, and this time Fluttershy wished she could faint at the horrifying sight.
Using its long arms, the spirit reached inside its own stomach. The arm’s length disappeared inside the infinite void of its zigzagged mouth, and Dusknoir was left hunched over as though he were trying to rip his own heart out. After a terribly long time, he began pulling his arm back out. As his hand became free of the jagged jaws, they snapped shut, and Fluttershy almost thought she saw the pseudo face grin at her.
Fluttershy looked on curiously as the spirit held the princess’ cloak before her, or rather, what was left of it. It seems that even with the upmost care and protection, material things do not last, for all that remained of the regal cloak was a tattered, rugged piece of cloth. Despite its appearance, it was evident by the way the spirit gently held it that it carried a huge importance for him. Though why he would carry it inside himself was beyond her understanding.
“She warned me that whether she failed to overthrow her sister or not, that there would be a great number of pony souls to bring to the afterlife, far too many to bring all at once. She told me to take the cloth’s powers and bring every last soul to the other side. She told me that the powers imbued in the cloth would allow me to enter the spirit world of my own free will.
“I accepted, and the horrific power of her cloak became my own, transforming me into what you see now.” He stretched his arms wide to display himself. “As I was awestruck by my newfound powers, she made me promise her something.” Dusknoir closed his eye and envisioned his mistress standing tall before him. Even the thought of her humbled him and he fell into reverence. “She made me swear that no matter what happens that night that I will always fulfill my duty as the guide to the spirit world.
Dusknoir erected his spine and crushed the fireball into his palm, setting his whole fist on fire. He held his flaming fist in front of his eye and his voice overflowed with passion as he spoke. “I promised her that I would always fulfill my duty. Until the end of all things I promised to make sure that the souls of all living creatures large or small, intelligent or ignorant, herbivore or carnivore, find their peace in the spirit world. She looked at me endearingly one last time and took off.”
The fire vanished from the phantom’s grip and his gaze returned to the remnant of Luna’s cloak. He sighed deeply, “I never saw her again.”