7
Semi-Charmed
I didn't sleep that night. There was no point. If the only dreams that are waiting for me either want to kill me or bring me heartbreak, then what's the point? I just laid there on the floor, staring at sleeping mare on the couch with me. Cherilee had stayed there with me that whole night. Of course she would fall asleep, but she did so while I was holding her. So, in which case, slapping me in the face.
Who knew dreams could break a pony's being apart in only one day? The first had just the right amount of bucked up settings to make me terrified of a song. The second reminded me no matter how hard I try, no matter how long we're together, and no matter how much she shows, she'll never love me the way I lover her. So, being wrapped up in an embrace with her for the long hours from the late night to early morning seems like vicious torture.
I tried to sit up to find the clock, but Cherilee had other ideas. She moved with me and acted as a blanket. She tightened her grip around me as she slept. Ugh! How come she doesn't have to go through this? I tried easing my way out of this constrictor-like hug. Only to wind up face to face with her.
She looked so beautiful. She had a look of pure bliss and innocence as she silently snored against my chest . She stirred a little when I pried her hooves from around my back and got up, but went back to sleep. I guess I'll head back home. There's not much to do and Cherilee needs to get up in a couple of hours to get to school. Before I left, turned to her. I felt bad leaving, but I couldn't take up all her time. I kissed her on the forehead and headed out.
-Park-
The sun was barely up so I assumed it was before six in the morning. The sky was grey and swelled with big, dark clouds, indicating that we might get some rain. Woe. Woe, woe, woe. This is stupid. I should be gardening and getting everything inside before the storm hits, but instead I'm walking to the only bar in Ponyville. It hid behind the park and stayed even more hidden as daytime rolled around. The only way to find it is to have actually been there. They probably expected me, like every morning or so.
The Golden Mare, it was called. Ironic, I know. At least, I see it as irony. Something so shiny and beautiful with whatever it goes with, and such a rare find at that, shares the name with me. Jacky D, the bartender, tells me not to worry so much on life, to not be so 'emo' as he says. Well I'm sorry, I haven't had a drink yet! So, at the moment, I give a buck about what's happening around me.
Halfway to the bar, I spotted something in the sky. It was going pretty fast, so I didn't pay it any mind. Wait...fast, flying...Shit! I broke into a gallop so I could probably get out of sight before that pegasus could see me. I wasn't in the mood to deal with her and/or Pinkie today. I've never have been! I got to this bush and hid. A light blue blur shot past and near ripped it from the ground. Before it passed again, I made my way to the bar.
The door to The Golden Mare had scratches around and covered the door knob, telling me Jacky got started with out me. I knocked on the door and shouted to him.
"Jacky! It's me, Golden! Let me in!" After a few minutes of knocking and paranoia that was telling me Rainbow was around, hoofsteps sounded behind the door. The knob jiggled and turned. The door slowly opened. What stood behind it was a beige stallion with orange mane, a mug of cider as a cutie mark, and grey eyes, that told me 'I'm glad to see you, but if you bang this door one more time, I'm clobbering you.'
"Golden!" He said through a slightly accented, raspy and high pitch voice. "How's it goin'?" He moved to hug me, which I welcomed. I'm glad that no matter what, I'll always have The Golden Mare. He stepped back and waved me in. I stepped through the door and was immediately welcomed by the smell of cider and cigars. He hopped over the bar and readied a bottle for me. I sat on the stool that faced him.
"So, why are you up so early? Had any nightmares?" He teased. If only he knew I thought.
"Just pour it, D! I've had a rough couple of days." I groaned and laid my head on the bar. He placed his hoof on top of my head and ruffled my mane.
"Oh why don't you tell old Uncle D' about it! After all, you helped me when Adriena left."
Oh, yeah. His wife left him a few years back and he dipped into a fit of binge drinking and shouting. He never cried. She took almost everything he had, until one day. He sat in this bar, all alone. Me and a couple of regulars got him riled up to the point of rushing home and telling Adriena, and I quote, "You lying, scummy tart! You can take me house, me kids, me dog, and me bar! I don't need em'! But don't you sit on your flank and not tell me face to face on how much of a piece of shit I am! Cuz, I know!..."
Jacky went on and on like that for awhile. He had me and the guys cracking up as he let loose. Of course, however, he got arrested and lost the bar for a year, but it was worth it in my book. Now, he was all cheery and happy, just a ray of bucking sunshine. Come to think of it, I missed it when he was a wreck.
"I don't wanna talk about it..." I said circling my hoof on the bar. He saw through this little act though.
"Golden," He began. "How long have I know ya?"
"Well...uh, I don't know. Four? Five years?"
"Five? Try eight. And how often are you in here, drowning your sorrows in cider and whiskey?"
I blushed a little. "But I like whiskey..."
"Oh, I know. Anyway, ya come in here almost every week with the same sour look and the same sad eyes with bags bigger then Adriena's haunches..." He got a laugh out of me with that. "...and do the same thing." He held out a bottle to me and I took it. We opened our drinks and drank em' like it was water. He coughed a little then continued. "Ya bitch and moan over how much ya love that Cherilee mare..."
"That's none of your business!" I hissed through my cider.
"Oi, give it up, Gold! Everpony who's been in this bar while ya were around, got an ear full of your 'undying desire', or some shit or whatever, and love for that teacher!" He was right. When ever I had too much, I would spill more of my emotions on the bar then my alcohol.
He went back to his other points. "Ya would start a fight with any couple that walked in all kissy facing another..."
"And win." I added.
"And win, Goldie. And win, but that's not all." He walked over to a wall by where a band would play and pointed at it. "Ya see these holes?"
"Yeah...But I don't see-"
"Well one day, after an incident with a certain librarian, one of my customers had gotten piss drunk and battered the shit out of me wall!"
The holes on the wall were indeed my doing. After what Twilight did, I had to vent. And when whiskey doesn't help..."You know, D. This place looks better with them. You should re-name the bar to something like, The Plot Hole or The Rundown Shithole." I laughed, to which he flipped his hoof up at me.
"Oh, buck off! I think the name it has now suits it better then before if ya ask me." He shot back, getting a little more then a reaction from me.
"Buck you! I'm surprised you still have the stones to talk tough, after Adriena left you with nothin' but half of your savings, this dump, and half of what's between your legs!" I fired. I'll admit, I went a little too far, but to my surprise, he laughed it off.
"Ha! I can assure ye, there Goldy! This here is no half, but the beginning of something that would make Princess Luna cringe!" He bragged.
"Why? Why because of it's small stature, or it's battle scars?"
"Oh, buck you. Just drink! I like ye better drunk. Ya never would have came up with those taunts if ye weren't so sober."
"I wish I wasn't sober..." I sank my head down on the bar as Jacky sat on the bar stool next to me and wrapped an arm around me...
-Cherilee's-
Cherilee had just woken up, uncomfortably curled on the couch. She was cold and her back hurt. She was having the most wonderful dream. She dreamed about laying against a tall apple tree on a hill, in the arms of Golden, as they watched the sunrise. Cherilee fell asleep in her arms, but awoke alone.
"She left..." She said aloud. "I guess she had to be somewhere." Cherilee tried to play it off like it was nothing. But it wasn't. She was sad and wanted Golden to stay. She rose from the couch, stretching to pop joints that were knotted by the uncomfortable couch she laid shared with her best friend. Though having no real reason to get up and get to the school for class, Cherilee made her way to the bathroom and fumbled with the shower faucets. The water released, making the sound of it hitting porcine. She stepped into the small warm waterfall and shut the curtain. She didn't move. Just stood in the warm rain.
"Why is that getting to me...why does it hurt knowing she's not there when I wake up?" Cherilee thought, while sifted her hooves through her mane. She could have died last night. What was with that song...she was cold. She wasn't breathing. She was...Oh, Golden... She leaned against the cold shower wall, as tears ran down her cheeks with the shower. She held her hooves to her chest, her heart. All she saw was the image of her cradling a lifeless Golden after she blacked out from the song.
Cherilee hadn't felt this deep about losing somepony since she lost her mother. That had been the hardest and most painful experience of her life. She remembered the countless nights she would spend in the hospital, right by her mother's side. She didn't go to school, didn't eat unless her mother ate, and always slept there. After the first week, her sickness had only gotten worse and time was running out. The doctors couldn't get her to leave, but Golden somehow got her to.
The following week...
Cherilee collapsed in the shower and curled up into a ball. The shower rained on her, but she didn't care. Those memories, they haunted her within her dreams, her thoughts. Her mother had always been there for her. But then her time came, and Cherilee never got over it. She promised to always be there for anypony who needed her...And nopony needs her more right now then Golden. She got off the floor of the tub and turned the water off.
After drying off, Cherilee grabbed her coat and key.
-The Golden Mare-
After several bottles of cider, mixed with whiskey by Jacky, I was leaning on him and spilling my guts about the past few days...
"...And that song...*sob* It haunts me, D. *sniff* It brings back memories of things I've been trying to forget for YEARS now!" I cried into his shoulder. He laid his head on mine.
"There, there, lassie. You're not alone in this! Ya have got me, Rainbow, Sparkle, that shy pony, that crazy pink mare, and most of all," He tilted my head so I faced him. "Ya got Cherilee." He said with a warm smile. It didn't help though. Cherilee didn't love me. That bucking dream told me so.
"No, I don't" I slammed my hoof on the bar. "Yeah, she helps me and keeps me company! So what?! I need more than that, Jacky...I want her to love me."
"Who?"
Jacky and I looked towards the door and saw a familiar rainbow haired pegasus. She had flight goggles on her head and was nursing her arm. I sighed, knowing that now she was about to know about my problems. I took my bottle of whiskey and chugged it down, with Jacky and Rainbow gawking at me.
"Dash! Where have you been?" Jacky asked, looking away from me binging.
"I've been flying around. Pegasus, DUH!" She said. Dash was always such a smart-flank. I didn't hate her, but I hated her personality. She looked back at me and she rushed over. "Carrot Top! Have you been crying?"
I could sense the worry in her voice, but didn't really want to give her any notice seeing how she still called me 'Carrot Top'. I looked at her, smiling. "Me? I've never felt better!" She didn't by it.
"Jacky." She said sternly. Jacky D couldn't really keep a secret from Dash, because he knew that she could force it out of him. With out hesitating, he told her.
"She's been having some troubles, Rainbow. One of em', is Cherilee." He said pulling me close.
"Cherilee? I can see that." She said with her hoof to her chin. "Why don't you just tell her?"
"Just tell her? Just tell her?! Do you know the shit I've had to go through?!" I stumbled off the bar stool to stare into her violet eyes. She backed away as a vented. "I had attempted suicide, had the shit kicked out of me by somepony I love, kissed and almost made it with Twilight, had a dream that left a scar on my psyche, had another dream to remind me of how lonely I am, and now, I've just realized! I've spent eight Celestia damn years drinking to forget about how low I've gotten!"
"Whoa...Calm down, Carrot Top-"
"And my name's NOT Carrot Top! It's Golden! I don't know where the BUCK you ponies came up with 'Carrot Top' but I can't stand it! My sister used to call-" I stopped. And didn't move. Jacky and Dash came closer after I froze in mid-sentence.
"Golden?" Jacky poked me. I fell backwards with a loud thud. Most of the impact went to my head. I was losing consciousness and I heard fuzzy voices, both very worried. They belonged to Rainbow and Jacky, and I thought I heard something out of place though...Did...Did I just hear one of them say 'blood'? I tried desperately to move my hoof to the back of my head. When I pulled it away, there was indeed blood, and all over. I couldn't take it and felt woozy. Before I fell into shock, the last things I heard was Jacky saying telling Rainbow to get help and me pulling them and whispering 'Don't tell Cherilee.' But the last thing I saw, was completely out of the ordinary. A pony, besides Rainbow and Jacky, was there. That figure from my dream. It's face came closer and whispered into my ear.
'Goodnight, Sis...'